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oresinho
  • 5/11/2025

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Fun
Transcript
00:01Good evening and welcome to Whose Line Is It Anyway?
00:05Tonight's performers, his name rhymes with Gerwood, Brad Sherwood.
00:09Her name rhymes with Gilmama, Karen Maruyama.
00:12His name rhymes with Orange, Colin Macri.
00:15And the world's tallest short guy, Ryan Stiles.
00:18And I'm your host, Drew Carey. Come on, let's have some fun.
00:21Hi, welcome to Whose Line Is It Anyway?
00:31The show where everything's made up and the points don't matter.
00:34For those of you unfamiliar with the show, what happens is our four performers are going to come down here
00:38and they're going to totally improvise everything you're going to see tonight.
00:41It's all made up right on the spot. They haven't seen any of the suggestions before the show.
00:44And we also get suggestions from the audience during the show.
00:46And at the end of each game, I give them points, which don't mean a thing,
00:48because at the end I'm just going to pick the guy I like the best or the girl I like the best.
00:52And they get to do a little something with me.
01:01You ready to get it started?
01:07First thing we're going to do is a game called Let's Make a Date.
01:09This is for all four of you.
01:10And Ryan, Colin and Brad are going to be contestants on a dating type show,
01:13hoping to be picked by the beautiful and lovely Karen.
01:15And each of them has been given a strange characteristic or identity.
01:19This is the first time they're seeing whatever's in these envelopes here.
01:21And Karen's going to ask them questions about whether you go on a date or not
01:24and try to guess where they are at the end of the round.
01:26So if you're ready, Karen, off you go.
01:28Hi, bachelor number one. I'm a really fun-loving person.
01:32If you were a MAC lipstick color, what would you be?
01:36I would be brown like the earth.
01:43A good solid earth tone, but you shouldn't wear so much makeup, you harpy.
01:48You're funny. You use big words.
01:53Bachelor number two, if I were Monica Lewinsky, where would you take me?
01:59Um, well, it's so many questions, I know.
02:09I'm going to see you. I'm going to see you. I'm going to see you.
02:12I'm going to see you. I'm just...
02:18God, you sound sexy.
02:20Um, bachelor number three?
02:22Yes.
02:23What's your idea of a really fun afternoon-daytime kind of date?
02:28Oh, I'd just like to, you know, spend some time with you.
02:31I think that's the main thing.
02:32You seem like kind of a hard egg, but I think I could crack you.
02:36Cracker? Cracker? Cracker?
02:38Oh!
02:43God, you...
02:44I can't wait to get back to you.
02:52Um, bachelor number one, what's your favorite color and why?
02:56Another color question, boy.
02:58I'll tell you, the color of a willow switch across your behind is what you need.
03:04I'll raise your bond if you know what I'm talking about.
03:07Okay, I like it, Bob.
03:09Okay.
03:10Um, gosh, you know what?
03:13Bachelor number two, favorite garden plant?
03:15OI-YAH!
03:17OI-YAH!
03:18OI-YAH!
03:19OOOF!
03:21OOOF!
03:22OOOF!
03:23OOOF!
03:24OOOF!
03:25OOOF!
03:26OOOF!
03:27OOOF!
03:28OOOF!
03:29OOOF!
03:30OOOF!
03:31OOOF!
03:32OOOF!
03:33OOOF!
03:34OOOF!
03:35Oh, yoooh!
03:36He's speaking in tongues!
03:37OOOF!
03:38OOOF!
03:39And finally, bachelor number three,
03:40Hello!
03:41Bloomingdale,
03:42Hello! Who's a pretty girl?
03:46Hi! Who's a pretty girl? Me!
03:50I like that answer! I didn't even ask a question! I like that answer!
03:54I like that answer! I like that answer! Hello!
04:06Hey Karen, you want to guess who they are? Uh, I think bachelor number one thought he was Sean Connery, yeah?
04:10No! No! No! You want to try it one more time
04:14so he won't look so bad? He was Sean Connery! James Bond!
04:18He was an Amish guy. It's so easy to get him
04:22confused, I know. James Bond.
04:26My wagon turns into a baroque.
04:32Uh, number two had no jaw.
04:34No, he was a guy in a dentist chair.
04:38That was close. Okay, and number three thought he was a parrot.
04:42Yeah!
04:44Alright!
04:50Well, a thousand points to Karen for that round.
04:52Even though she got two wrong, I think she's cute.
04:58Now we go on to a game called, uh, Song Styles.
05:00This is for Brad with Laura Hall on the piano.
05:02Laura Hall, how about it?
05:08Brad is going to make up a song about somebody in the audience.
05:10Let's turn right behind me, and is there anybody here in the audience who would like a song made up about them?
05:14You, ma'am, with your hand raised. What's your name?
05:16Neroshi.
05:18Neroshi!
05:20What do you do, Neroshi?
05:22What do you do?
05:24I go to UC San Diego.
05:26You go to UC San Diego, and what's your major?
05:28Um, Political Science and Economics.
05:30So Neroshi, who majors in Political Science and Economics.
05:34Neroshi?
05:36Yeah, Neroshi.
05:38Neroshi?
05:39Yeah, Neroshi.
05:40Try rhyming that.
05:43And, uh, he'll be singing in the style of a rock love ballad.
05:59I don't know what to do
06:01I'm failing out of political science
06:07Neroshi.
06:09Neroshi.
06:10I don't know what to say
06:15But let us two go away to France
06:20And sail on the reef goshi
06:24Neroshi!
06:29Let's cook some brioche
06:32Neroshi!
06:36I'll put on some suntan ocean
06:41Neroshi!
06:43I love you
06:46It's true
06:48I really do
06:53I wanna sail across the seven seas
06:57In the Pacific Ocean
07:01Neroshi!
07:03Uh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
07:09Why?!
07:10Couldn't you have an easy robin' name?
07:14Why?!
07:16I'd have an easier job in this game!
07:20Neroshi
07:21We're so closey
07:23Thank you Narossi, that was great, thank you very much.
07:53A hundred points for Pacific Oshie.
08:01Now we're going to a game called Daytime Talk Show.
08:03This is for all four performers.
08:04Brad, you're going to be the host of a daytime talk show.
08:06Ryan and Karen, you're going to be members of the public appearing on the show.
08:09And Colin, you're going to be a guy in the audience who asks questions.
08:12However, the subject isn't a normal talk show subject.
08:16We're going to do...
08:17We need a fairy tale or a nursery rhyme from the audience.
08:20Alice in Wonderland!
08:23Okay, that's fine. That's fine. Alice in Wonderland, that's a good one.
08:26Brad, Alice in Wonderland is a subject, so whenever you're ready, go ahead.
08:30Hello and welcome to Alice Doesn't Live Here Anymore.
08:33Where does she live? We're not really sure. We're trying to track her down.
08:37So let's go to our first guest and find out what you know about Alice and or Wonderland.
08:41Sir, I'm Lyle Moon. I own Lyle's Glassware.
08:45And where's that located, sir?
08:47Fifth and Johnson.
08:48And how do you relate?
08:50I sold her the mirror.
08:51Ah, the looking glass, as it were.
08:53Well, I didn't know that when I sold it to her.
08:55I thought it was a mirror, otherwise I would have charged her more.
08:58Now, how tall was she at the time? Five inches or 14 feet?
09:01Well, I'm 6'6", so it's hard to judge.
09:03Ah, right then.
09:05We'll get back to you in just a minute.
09:07Please tell us who you are and why you're here.
09:09Yeah, I'm Lily Ha.
09:10She lives in my building and she has not paid her rent.
09:22She's always popping down rabbit hole.
09:24Lily, I don't have it.
09:25I'm in a rabbit hole.
09:26Yeah, right.
09:27Let me ask you, if I could ask you a question, sir.
09:31Where in town do you have this building?
09:34Sir, I'll wait till I tell my husband you call me a him.
09:37Oh.
09:39I got confused by the mustache.
09:41I'm sorry.
09:42Actually, Alice still owes me for half the mirror as well,
09:44so I would have to agree with the Dutch girl.
09:46Yeah.
09:52Actually, I'm Flemish.
09:54Are you Flemish?
09:55Yeah.
09:56Maybe you could get a hanky.
09:57Alright, let's go to the audience, shall we?
09:59Oh, let's see.
10:00I'm going to take some questions.
10:01Yes, the effeminate man right there.
10:05Hi.
10:07I just want to say I think it's horrible
10:09that Tweedledum and Tweedledum are over there.
10:11I've lured this poor girl into a life of going through mirrors
10:15and meeting strange people.
10:16I mean, what is that?
10:17What is that?
10:18I have a good mind to come down there.
10:20Yeah, you come and do.
10:21You want a piece?
10:22You want a piece?
10:23You want a piece?
10:24You want a piece?
10:25You want a piece?
10:26You want a piece?
10:27You want a piece?
10:28You want a piece?
10:29You want a piece?
10:30You want a piece?
10:31You want a piece?
10:32You want a piece?
10:33You want a piece?
10:34You want a piece?
10:35You want a piece?
10:36Well, I have to compete.
10:37I don't think we're going to be able to solve this today.
10:39Tune in next week if Alice doesn't live here anymore.
10:47Hey, take your way.
10:48We'll be right back with more Whose Line Is It Anyway?
10:50Stay right where you are.
10:54Hey, welcome back to Whose Line Is It Anyway?
11:09And as a special treat for all you people watching on an American-made television, we're
11:12in 3D.
11:14Now we've come to a game called Props.
11:17Now we're going to invite you into two pairs.
11:19Colin and Ryan, this is your prop right here.
11:24I know.
11:25And Karen and Brad, this is your prop.
11:29And the idea is they're going to make up as many things as they can with these things
11:32and I'll buzz them off in between.
11:33And Ryan and Colin, whenever you're ready, you can go ahead and start.
11:36Well, you've got a table for Elvis.
11:37I'll tell you something about it.
11:38Ice bird!
11:39Cling, cling!
11:40Cling, cling!
11:41Because it is the people's money.
11:42Cling, cling, cling!
11:43I'll warn the other beavers.
11:44Because it is the people's money.
11:57I'll warn the other beavers.
12:04I think they look very natural.
12:10Do you have a table for Madonna?
12:14It must have been a heavy car.
12:31Spock, put the dribbles down and help me with the ship.
12:40Thank you very much.
12:44I was going to give points to Brad, but he gave me a dirty look.
12:46I'm not.
12:47In case you were wondering, I was using the doorbell instead of the buzzer.
12:51Because the buzzer is broken.
12:55Now let's go on to a game called Film Dub.
12:57This is for Ryan, Karen, and Colin.
12:59You're going to make up dialogue for a film scene.
13:01You'll be able to see it on the monitor here.
13:03You'll be able to see it at home.
13:04You're going to make up lines for all the characters.
13:05And the scene I'd like you to improvise is One Day in the West.
13:10It's because I love you.
13:12I've always loved you, and you know that.
13:14As long...
13:15Well, you say that a lot.
13:16But you know what?
13:16I'm worried about Bob.
13:18I really wish you wouldn't interrupt me in the middle of a sentence.
13:20I was saying how much I love you.
13:22I love you more than the sun comes...
13:25Yeah, that's right.
13:26I love you.
13:27There's something wrong with Bob.
13:28I tell you, he's not himself.
13:29He's...
13:30Forget about Bob.
13:33It's you and me, baby.
13:35I'm the sheriff.
13:36I can do whatever I want in this town.
13:38I love you.
13:40I...
13:40I love you.
13:46Look at this haircut you gave me.
13:50Look what he did.
13:52Look what he did.
13:53I love it.
13:54I asked for a perm.
13:55A perm, a perm, a perm.
13:57I'm not a...
13:58Oh, I'm a star.
13:59You let the long rods in too long.
14:02Oh, I'm sorry.
14:05I guess I just got excited.
14:07Oh, God.
14:08Hey, hello.
14:09Oh, my God.
14:09Oh, that was some kiss.
14:11And your hat's...
14:11Oh, man.
14:19I'll give 100 points to Colin, because he doesn't get to talk about perms often.
14:27Wow, man.
14:31Oh, man.
14:32Now we go...
14:33Now we go on to a game called Sportscasters.
14:36This is for all four of you.
14:38Brad and Karen, you're going to be sportscasters, like an ESPN type thing.
14:41And you're going to be commentating on an everyday event acted out by Ryan and Colin.
14:45We'll act out the event in slow motion.
14:47Uh, Ryan and Colin, you are rival waders.
14:54Brad and Karen, whenever you're ready, go ahead and start.
14:55Hello, and welcome to ESPN's Waiting Tables Championships.
15:00I'm Carl Orangutang, here with Karen Chimpanzee.
15:04And it's going to be quite the competition today.
15:08Isn't it, Karen?
15:08That's right.
15:09We're really excited.
15:10So, let's find out where the competition is going to start.
15:15Oh, looks like they're already setting down the beverages.
15:18They've got water.
15:19And, oh, looks like Ryan has something up his sleeve.
15:23Uh-oh.
15:23He does.
15:24A fist.
15:25Ouch.
15:25That's right.
15:26He's doing the nose corkscrew trick.
15:29That's right.
15:30Colin's got a loose grip on his potato skins.
15:33Yowza, yowza.
15:35Oh, it looks like he's doing the old doctoring the drink trick.
15:38Yes, he learned this when he was butter-turning on an Amish farm.
15:41Ouch.
15:42That's right.
15:42Oh.
15:44They don't teach this in Somalia school.
15:46I've never seen that.
15:48Oh, it's the carbonation mind freeze.
15:51That's right.
15:52There it goes.
15:53Oh.
15:56I must say that Colin is a brute, and so is the champagne.
15:59That's right.
16:00Colin's going for the zucchini.
16:02Oh.
16:03Oh, he's gotten surprised for the back.
16:05Hot hors d'oeuvres cheese, and luckily there's a microwave oven.
16:07He came up in there.
16:08Reheat his head.
16:09That's right.
16:10Oh.
16:11Hope he has no metal in his skull.
16:14Oh.
16:15He sent it off the lid.
16:22He looks like Sweeney Todd from the Broadway musical.
16:25That's going to be painful.
16:26That's going to hurt.
16:27What has he got here?
16:28Oh, he's laying down some very expensive cutlery.
16:33And what's he got?
16:34Oh.
16:36Speaking of cutlery.
16:37Cutlery.
16:37Oh, all hands on.
16:38Oh.
16:41The old back door crack.
16:43Oh.
16:44And the front.
16:45Oh.
16:53Hey, what do you know?
16:54Now that we finally found an American one, it's working again.
16:57God bless America.
17:03Okay, now we go on to a game called Hoedown.
17:11Everybody's favorite game, with the help of Laura Hall on the piano.
17:14What do you need from the audience?
17:15Let's take the ignored section over there.
17:17They never get that.
17:17They never get that.
17:18I need something about modern life that annoys you.
17:25Something about modern life that annoys you.
17:30Kids at a movie theater.
17:32It's pretty good.
17:35I heard tourists.
17:37That's a pretty good one.
17:38Tourists.
17:39So, Laura, why don't you start the tourists or kids at a movie theater.
17:42Hoedown.
17:42Tourists are the one in shorts with sandals on their feet.
17:54When I drive around, I run them over in the street.
17:59I do that for my town's own protection.
18:02I am singing this song for the ignored section.
18:06Tourists from Japan are really the best.
18:18They're used to traveling without any rest.
18:22I look just like them.
18:24Oh, what the heck?
18:25Except that I don't have a great big camera on my neck.
18:29The other day, I was at a movie.
18:39The kids were all loud.
18:41They were making noise and throwing stuff.
18:43What an ugly crowd.
18:45I told them there was something, and then they all cried.
18:49I ruined the movie.
18:50I told them Bambi's mother died.
18:59I hate it at the movies when all the kids scream.
19:08I have to admit that is really not my scene.
19:12But one thing's for sure, an usher I will not call.
19:16I just sit in front of them.
19:18I'm over six feet tall.
19:25Hey, Smith, don't go away.
19:26We'll be right back with more Who's Line Is It Anyway?
19:28We're right up to these commercials.
19:34Hey, welcome back to Who's Line Is It Anyway?
19:36Tonight's winner is Colin Ryan.
19:38Colin and Ryan, everybody?
19:41Had nothing at all to do with the points.
19:42I just like them best.
19:44And we're going to play a game called Stand, Sit, Bend.
19:46In this game, one of us must always be standing.
19:47One must always be sitting.
19:48One must always be bending over.
19:50And if anybody changes the positions, the other ones have to make up for it.
19:53And Brad, what's our scene?
19:54You are having a showdown in a Wild West saloon.
19:58All righty.
20:02Tiddling, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding.
20:05Town's not big enough for the two of us.
20:06Tindling, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding.
20:09So what are you saying?
20:09I'm saying we ought to settle this like men, you know?
20:14Wait a minute.
20:14I don't want any fights in here.
20:16I want you to be the ref.
20:18All right.
20:19I'll accept that job.
20:20But I ain't going to be fair, I'll tell you that.
20:22All right.
20:25Now, I don't want any problems in the bar.
20:27I'm just going to put away all the liquor.
20:29We'll go up the count of three.
20:30You cheat.
20:31Okay.
20:32Tiddly, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding.
20:41Please, you thank me enough.
20:43Stop bowing.
20:44All right.
20:45Are you ready?
20:46Yeah, I'm ready.
20:47All right.
20:47On the count of three.
20:49You both turn around and walk the opposite ways.
20:53What?
20:53On the count of three?
20:55On the count of three.
20:56I don't understand.
20:56You stand back to back and you both go opposite ways.
20:59So on the count of three, we walk that way.
21:02You wear it.
21:02Okay.
21:03Let me be here.
21:04You've got to stand back to back.
21:05Don't you understand me?
21:06We stand back to back.
21:07Yes.
21:07All right.
21:07How much clearer can I make this?
21:09All right.
21:10Back to back.
21:13I'm back to back.
21:15What a chance in my way.
21:17Take three paces.
21:18One, two, three, turn around and fire.
21:22Oh, God, you got me there.
21:24Oh, oh, that got me bad.
21:27Hey, thanks for watching.
21:28Who found this in my way?
21:29We'll see you another time.
21:30Good night.
21:30Good night.
21:42Go!