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  • 4/28/2025

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Fun
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00:01Good evening and welcome to Whose Line Is It Anyway?
00:04On tonight's show, shaken, not stirred.
00:06Greg Proops with a twist of line.
00:09Wayne Brady on the rocks.
00:11Colin Mochrie.
00:13And in a coconut shell with a little umbrella,
00:15Ryan Style!
00:17I'm Drew Carey, your host. Come on down, let's have some fun.
00:24Hello.
00:27Welcome to Whose Line Is It Anyway?
00:29The show where everything's made up and the points don't matter.
00:31That's right, the points are useless.
00:33Like Keith Richards to a vampire.
00:39Let's show you how funny it gets by playing the game called Let's Make a Date.
00:43This is for all four of you.
00:44Wayne, you're gonna be appearing on a dating type show.
00:46Ryan, Colin, and Greg are the contestants hoping to be picked by you,
00:48but we've given them each a strange quirk or identity.
00:51And you have to guess who they are by the end of the game.
00:53So whenever you're ready, off you go.
00:55Bachelor number one.
00:56Yeah.
00:57I...
01:03I love a man who's physically fit, who has it in all the right places.
01:06Well, isn't that great for you?
01:12Halla-bloody-luia.
01:14I'd like to know what you do and what type of physical regimen you use to keep your body in shape.
01:21Well, I'll work and no play.
01:23Makes for a dull time.
01:27That's number two.
01:28Woo-hoo!
01:29Yeah.
01:30After I finish with a hard day's work, I enjoy...
01:32Excuse me.
01:33Excuse me.
01:34Mm-hmm.
01:35You wanna get out from in front of me?
01:36Sorry.
01:37Oh, sorry, I...
01:38Yeah, I'm sorry.
01:39What were you saying?
01:40After I finish with work, I enjoy doing pottery to unwind.
01:43How do you unwind after a long, hard day working nine to five?
01:44Oh, you know.
01:45I don't know.
01:46This sucks!
01:52This sucks!
02:18Catcher number three.
02:19Yes, I can hear you.
02:20When I was the darkest child in my village in Sweden growing up, we used to drink cocoa
02:40and celebrate our ancestors that came before us.
02:43What did your ancestors do and how would you emulate them?
02:45They took a bullet for me.
02:47Well, bachelor number...
02:48Sit down.
02:49Bachelor number one.
02:50You're back to me, Wendy.
02:51How great.
02:52When I was a small child, my mother told me to be with a man who would take care of me.
03:10How would you take care of me?
03:11Oh, I'd take care of you real good.
03:16Here's your boyfriend.
03:17Chapter number two.
03:18Yeah.
03:19Yeah.
03:20Yeah.
03:21What?
03:22I'll be there.
03:23Yeah?
03:24Yeah?
03:25Yeah?
03:26Yeah?
03:27Yeah?
03:28Yeah?
03:29Yeah?
03:30Yeah?
03:31Yeah?
03:32Yeah?
03:33Yeah?
03:34Yeah?
03:35Yeah?
03:36Yeah?
03:37Yeah?
03:38Yeah?
03:39That's number three.
03:40That's number three?
03:41Yes?
03:42Three, three, three, three, three.
03:46Yeah.
03:47What? I'll be there.
03:47Yeah. Go ahead. Go ahead.
03:48Yeah.
03:50Yeah.
03:51Yeah.
03:53Yeah.
03:54That's number three.
03:55That's number three?
03:56Yes.
03:57I love America.
03:59What do you love?
04:00I love a good cigar, just like my number one guy here.
04:03Did someone say black leather?
04:14I don't know how you're going to guess who they are, but try, won't you?
04:22Bachelor number one is, uh, oh my gosh.
04:25Well, take your guess.
04:30No. Oh, Jack Nicholson.
04:32Jack Nicholson.
04:33I really can't, God.
04:38Bachelor number two is a really rude moviegoer.
04:42Yes.
04:46And, uh, Ryan, as Bachelor number three is a, um, is, is, uh, is secret service to the president.
04:53Yes.
05:00All right. That was great.
05:02I'm going to give you, uh, 1,000 worthless points.
05:04Ooh.
05:05Let's go on to a game call.
05:07Let's make a date.
05:08Those are all four of you.
05:09Wayne, you're going to be appearing on a dating show.
05:10Oh.
05:11Okay.
05:12Fuck it.
05:13Excuse me, Captain Alzheimer.
05:15Go to the third card, Drew.
05:22Go to the third card.
05:24Go to the third card.
05:26What is?
05:29Greg's next job.
05:31So, uh, let's go on to a game called, uh, Phil Dub.
05:38This is for Ryan, Greg, and Colin.
05:39They're going to supply their own soundtrack to a, uh, film we picked out for them.
05:43And, uh, you guys can see the screen.
05:46The scene I like to improvise is a marriage in trouble.
05:49You're going to make up all the, uh, words for the people on the screen there.
05:51It's, uh, a marriage in trouble.
05:54Hello, darling.
05:55How was your day?
05:57Yeah.
05:58I've been very busy.
05:59Very good.
06:00Thank you for asking.
06:01Did you go out shopping?
06:02Get around much?
06:04I've been busy.
06:05Busy being a mad scientist.
06:06But you don't respect that, do you?
06:08You just lay there in your dish of liquid and laugh at me.
06:10You scoff at me.
06:11Tell me now where you put the rest of my body.
06:13Oh, yes.
06:14Well, I've had enough of you.
06:15You and your whining.
06:16I'm going to make a pizza.
06:17I used to make pizza for you long, long ago.
06:20Yes, and I know.
06:21Ah!
06:22Buy an encyclopedia!
06:23Buy an encyclopedia!
06:24Buy an encyclopedia!
06:25Buy an encyclopedia.
06:26You must!
06:27I got him!
06:28I'm working my way through choreography school!
06:31Jimmy!
06:32Olé!
06:33It's that damn neighbor kid.
06:34Ugh.
06:35Ugh.
06:36Ugh.
06:37Well, now you know how I feel.
06:38Ha, ha, ha, ha.
06:39Ugh.
06:40Sorry, darling.
06:41Just trying to be disarming.
06:43Ho, ho, ho.
06:46All right.
06:50That was fantastic.
06:54I'm going to give you 1,000 points.
06:55You know why?
06:56Because at home, some idiot's keeping score and he wants to know what the points are.
07:00We get letters, folks.
07:01I'm telling you.
07:02I can't believe it.
07:03Now, let's go on to a game called Film and TV and Theater Styles.
07:06This is for Ryan, Colin, and Wayne.
07:08And what I need for the audience is different styles of television, styles of movies, or
07:12styles of TV.
07:13Porno, Star Trek, Animal Planet.
07:14Oh, Mexican soap opera, yeah.
07:15Novelas.
07:16Anybody else?
07:17Oh, Gladiator movie.
07:18That's a good one.
07:19Okay, we got enough.
07:20That's good.
07:21What's going to happen is you guys are going to start out a scene normally, then I'm going
07:22to interrupt you and make you do these different styles.
07:24And the scene is Ryan is a speeding motorist and you're pulled over by Wayne, a motorcycle
07:29cop, Officer Wayne, who discovers Colin tied up in the back.
07:47That's a frightening.
07:48Yeah, as usual, yeah.
07:52Whenever you're ready, go ahead and start.
07:59What the?
08:19Mexican soap opera.
08:21My name is Officer Big Bob.
08:31What?
08:34My name is Officer Big Bob.
08:37Welcome to County of Orange.
08:42What?
08:45Freeze!
08:48Oh.
08:55Gladiator movie.
09:05Why don't I escape from you, Glador?
09:08You will die!
09:09You'll never catch me!
09:11Quickly!
09:12Yah!
09:13Yah!
09:14Yah!
09:15Yah!
09:16Ah!
09:17Porno.
09:18Ugh!
09:19I'm sorry I dropped the law.
09:22You, are you okay?
09:23I'm feeling much better now, Officer.
09:29I have a...
09:30I have a...
09:31I have a...
09:32I don't know why I'm drawn to this ain't a Dr.
09:34I don't know why I'm drawn to this one, but, uh, Animal Planet.
10:04I've been tracking this guy for the last five miles.
10:16He's had my good friend Colin locked up in the back of his boot.
10:19I'm going to attempt to sneak up behind him and wrap a rope around him.
10:22I hope he doesn't bite me.
10:25Star Trek.
10:32It's all right.
10:38We'll be right back with our Who's Highs.
10:39What's wrong with this?
10:40Don't go away.
10:41Hey, welcome back to Who's Highs in Anyway, the show where everything is made up and the
11:00points don't matter.
11:01I had a rough night last night.
11:02Huh?
11:03Yeah, my blow-up doll ran off with my air mattress.
11:07Quite a, uh, quite a night.
11:10Moving on to a game called Themed Restaurant.
11:13This is for all four of you.
11:14Colin and Wayne, your two businessmen, having a power lunch in a themed restaurant.
11:18And Greg and Ryan are the maitre d' and the waiter.
11:21The theme of the restaurant is an emergency room.
11:24Boom.
11:25Go ahead whenever you're ready.
11:27Uh-huh.
11:28Right.
11:29Gotcha.
11:30Okay.
11:31Listen, Johnson, I'll make it flat.
11:32I'll put it on the table and you take it.
11:33All right.
11:34Let me call you about that.
11:35Okay, fine.
11:36It's you.
11:37Hello?
11:38Oh, yes.
11:39We would like some wine.
11:40Gentlemen, have you been served yet?
11:41I know we haven't.
11:42You haven't been served yet?
11:43This table's stacked now.
11:44Let's get some more service over here.
11:45Have you had menus yet?
11:46All right, no.
11:47Can someone order wine?
11:48Sure, I'll take some.
11:54Is everything to your liking so far?
11:58Well, so far.
11:59So far?
12:00Well...
12:01Not excited?
12:02Clear!
12:03I need 15 hemoglobins of scleboglobin for this man right here.
12:07Right.
12:08Here's our specials.
12:10My God!
12:11You've got a spot on your lung.
12:13What?
12:14Oh, my God.
12:15Quick, get a liver in here.
12:17Let's take out his.
12:18All right.
12:19What the hell?
12:20How would you like your liver done?
12:21Uh, well?
12:22Well done?
12:23Oh!
12:24Pfft!
12:25Pfft!
12:26Pfft!
12:27Pfft!
12:28Pfft!
12:29Pfft!
12:30Pfft!
12:31Pfft!
12:32Pfft!
12:33Pfft!
12:34Pfft!
12:35Pfft!
12:36Pfft!
12:37Pfft!
12:38Pfft!
12:39Oh!
12:40There we go.
12:41I just want some salad.
12:42Salad?
12:43My God, the man's got the Heimlich...
12:44He needs a Heimlich maneuver this instant!
12:45Off to the salad bar!
12:46Out of the way!
12:47Out of the way!
12:48Out of the way!
12:49It's all right!
12:51Never mind about him. He he lost his dessert. That's right. I wanted some chicken. Here's your bill. It's $25,000
13:00What? Who? He's gone. He's gone. I'm off duty now.
13:15Give you, uh, 300 points apiece for that. I give you more. I'm already dipping into my own stash.
13:23Let's go on to a game now called Song Styles. Greatest Hits.
13:30Man, I have one step behind. This one's for all four contestants.
13:33Wayne will be choosing a date, but they're not exactly what you think.
13:43Well, let's go on to a game called Greatest Hits.
13:46This is for Colin, Ryan and Wayne with Laura and Linda and Cece.
13:53Colin and Ryan are TV voiceover guys. They're going to be talking about the latest compilation album they're trying to sell.
13:58Wayne is going to try to sing the songs that they make up for him.
14:01What we need for the audience is a job or you would wear a uniform.
14:06Zookeeper. That's good. Let's do songs of the zookeeper.
14:10Hi. We'll be back to your movie out of Africa in just a moment.
14:13But first, have we got a deal for you.
14:16You know, since Noah, there have been songs about animals, zoos and zookeepers.
14:22And we have compiled the best of all possible animal related songs on this.
14:31A very little CD that has over 150,000 songs on it.
14:36That's right, Colin, including that number one, Miami.
14:43Wait.
14:45Apparently we have a special bonus.
14:49It's one of Drew Carey's cue cards, which has never been read.
14:53Some of these songs say a lot.
15:03Oh.
15:04I remember a protest song out of the 60s that I had on a record in the 60s.
15:10Wow.
15:11What kind of strange coincidence is that?
15:13What?
15:14That 1960s protest song, simply titled...
15:32Yeah, people just say that you just can't learn.
15:38But my best friend, he's a big pack-a-dun.
15:43Ah, what can, what can I do?
15:46But I'll tell you what.
15:49Horton heard a who.
15:52Here they go.
15:54Oh, yeah, yeah.
15:55Save my friends, because my friends go.
16:03Save the elephant.
16:05Thank you very much.
16:08Oh, it's wonderful, isn't it?
16:16Yeah.
16:17And if you order right now, it'll still take four to six weeks to get it.
16:22You know, animals and zookeepers have not only inspired the tango,
16:26the Macarena, and a waltz somewhere in Pismo,
16:31but who could forget the 1953 poker hit...
16:37Poker hit...
16:39Beers and Sloths.
16:41All the animals jumping in.
16:51Come on!
16:52Come on!
16:53Come on!
16:55The only way to fill the trot
16:58Is get all the beer invite over the Sloths.
17:01Sloths are very fun-loving guys.
17:04guys, they love to hear
17:06the animal cries.
17:08Slavs like, oink! And Slavs like,
17:10woo! And Slavs like,
17:12hur, hur, hur! But
17:14most of all, when you
17:16come near, the Slavs, they love
17:18their beer. Hey, hey!
17:20Good night!
17:25You know,
17:26Colin, there's a lot of great artists
17:28on this CD set, but there's only
17:30one that earns the name of
17:32Diva. I'm talking
17:34about Miss Diana
17:36Ross and
17:38her rendition of
17:39Please Don't Feed.
17:54I know.
17:55I know when you come to the zoo.
17:58I know you want to feed
17:59everything, but don't.
18:02I'll hurt you.
18:04Baby, baby, don't you
18:06know it's no bull?
18:08Baby, baby, baby,
18:10don't feed the animals.
18:13If you do,
18:15I would get
18:16real pissed.
18:18Just like the other day
18:19when I got frisks.
18:23Don't feed the animals,
18:24it's not a thing.
18:26No, not the lion, because he's the king.
18:28Don't feed the bear, because he'll take off
18:30your arms.
18:31You feed the hippo, you'll come to
18:32Bobby Hawk.
18:33Don't feed the monkeys,
18:34no matter what you do.
18:35He might get irate, start slinging poop.
18:38Don't feed the giraffe, because he's too tall.
18:40I think I've done them all.
18:42You have to feed the animals.
18:44Stop!
18:45Feed the animals.
18:46Don't go away, we're going to find out who the winner is right after this.
18:59Hey, welcome back.
19:00Tonight's winner is
19:03everyone but Greg.
19:06So, we're going to do
19:07props for you. We're going to do a little game called
19:09props, and we're going to divide up. Me and Ryan are going to be together
19:11and you guys are going to be together. And we've got to get some
19:13props. Why don't you give us our props?
19:15Ryan and Drew.
19:16And we have to come up with, uh, we have to come up with as many ideas
19:19as we can for these props.
19:21Going back and forth. And,
19:23uh, we'll start.
19:25Oh, that joke is about as funny as
19:27Oh, oh!
19:28Put them off! Put them off!
19:34Ooh, it is cold in here.
19:39I would like to return my pasta maker.
19:44You killed the witch.
19:48So then, I told Mrs. Shisha
19:50that she better shut her mouth.
19:52Oh! Oh, that's right.
19:53I'm telling her, I'm going to kill her.
19:56Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding,
19:58You're not the first, madam.
20:02We get squid stuck in vacuums every day.
20:08I'm the song.
20:09He's the dance.
20:13Mind if I join you in the shower?
20:15No, come on.
20:18I don't believe we've met.
20:19Hi, Captain Hat.
20:20Nice to meet you.
20:20Oh, very nice to meet you.
20:23Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun.
20:26Oh!
20:26No!
20:31Titanic will never sing.
20:33Titanic will never sing.
20:34Oh, hey, we'll be right back for Who's Line in the mix.
20:39I'm going to work.
20:46Hey, welcome back to Who's Line in the mix.
20:48Anyway, tonight, we're going to end the show with Greg and Wayne.
20:52Need the credits?
20:52I want you to do the credits as a hillbilly couple backstage at the Jerry Springer Show.
20:56Thanks for watching, everybody.
20:59Have a good night.
21:00Woo!
21:01You did, too.
21:03You were with Denise O'Donoghue.
21:05No, I wasn't.
21:05Yes, you were.
21:06Just like Mark Levinson.
21:07No, you're the one.
21:08You was with Drew Carey.
21:09I'll tell you, backstage.
21:11And another thing.
21:12If you touch that Eric Wilker again, you...
21:15I'll tell you something.
21:21Keith Winterkopf is a better lady than you ever were.
21:23Oh, is that so?
21:24That's true.
21:24That's true, because I've been with your cousin.
21:26My what?
21:27Your cousin.
21:27That's my mama.

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