Robot Chicken Season 1 Episode 18X01 Adultizzle Swizzle

iCarly

Transcript

00:00It's Alive!

00:30Welcome back to First Date, where we've already matched up some unlikely couples.

00:48A geek with a beauty queen, a basketball player with a dwarf, and jackass star Steve-o with someone who isn't a loser.

00:56But this time, we've outdone ourselves.

00:59Susan hails from Los Angeles, and like all of us, she's looking to be bitten, that is, smitten, by love.

01:06So, I was like, raised Jewish, and family's very important to me.

01:12If my dad knew how important sex was to me, I would die.

01:17Daddy's little princess has a wild streak. Think we can find someone to tame her?

01:22Douglas is a predator from Newark, New Jersey, who prides himself on his trophy collection.

01:27But are women just part of the hunt for him?

01:29I'm sure I respect women. One time, this girl I knew had big boobs, and I respect that.

01:36I'm a gentleman. If someone disrespects my girl, I'll skin him. You know how sweet like that.

01:42One's an alien, the other's a predator. Will they have chemistry, or is this a case of science friction?

01:49Oh, hi.

01:54Oh, hi.

01:55Are you Susan?

01:56Yes, nice to meet you.

01:58I'm Douglas.

02:01Hmm, yeah. Beautiful day we're having.

02:05Yeah, yeah, it's great.

02:07So, what kind of guys do you usually date?

02:13Oh, I don't know. I don't really have a type.

02:17My father may not approve of you, though, since I'm Jewish and you're Predator American.

02:23Oh, he's kind of protective, huh?

02:25Yeah, totally. He's kind of tough.

02:28So, how important is sex to you in a relationship?

02:36Oh, I don't know. Pretty important, I guess.

02:40Yeah, I don't know what I'd do without sex. I gotta have it all the time.

02:44All the time, huh?

02:45Hot tubs and lights, aren't they? I also love the way the moonlight on the water brings out the shine on your chitinous shell.

02:59Aww.

03:01Oh, no.

03:03Don't do it.

03:04You can do better.

03:07Ew.

03:08So, it was really nice meeting you.

03:12You're, um, you're a really nice person.

03:17Oh, my God, I'm so sorry.

03:20Are you okay?

03:22Um, uh, you want a band-aid?

03:29Oh, that date didn't end well, did it, folks?

03:32Think they'll ever go on again?

03:34Let's check back and ask them.

03:38Guess not.

03:42Now's our chance, boys!

03:58Oh, my God!

03:59Look at him!

04:00Back traffic!

04:01You gotta get out of the car!

04:03Tetsuo!

04:09Welcome back to the Carousel of Tomorrow, where we look at humanity's march into the future.

04:15Can you imagine, excited viewers, what marvels the 21st century holds?

04:20Why, just imagine, the Chinese say they're going to land a man on the moon by the year 2020.

04:28What would that be like, do you think?

04:30No.

04:31No.

04:32No!

04:35Inspiring.

04:37As we reach towards space, we also look inward.

04:41The unlocking of the human genome will allow the birth of perfect babies in the future.

04:46Why, think of a world without disease, or midgets, where every child is perfect in every way.

04:55See how?

04:56Well, and would you believe that as high-speed internet access improves, doctors can perform complicated surgeries without leaving the beach?

05:06You will.

05:10And in the future, virtual reality sex will be perfected, and society will be forever changed.

05:18Mr. Wembley?

05:26You like that, don't you, bitch?

05:28Wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up.

05:31Mayor McCheese!

05:32Mayor McCheese!

05:33How do your views differ from Governor Schwarzenegger, given that he's a Republican, and you have a cheeseburger for a head?

05:39It's a birth defect!

05:42Oh, I've dealt with prejudice all my life.

05:46Mr. Mayor!

05:47Mr. Mayor!

05:48There have been allegations that you have taken women to motel rooms and paid them to go to the bathroom on your chest.

05:56Uh, uh, uh, uh, rawrrawrrawrrawr!

05:58Oh, don't get any blood on the new carpet!

06:12America's number one today in Super Spy is back in action!

06:16Never mess with a man's raw thigh array!

06:20The hood-mounted gatling guns are quite deadly when...

06:24How many miles per gallon?

06:25Uh, 25 or so.

06:27Now the smokescreen generator...

06:29Is that highway or city mileage?

06:37Do you expect me to talk, Goyfinger?

06:40No, Mr. Hashana.

06:42I expect you to eat this VLT!

06:45That's not car-

06:46This summer, get chillin' with the tefillin!

06:50Ross Hashana!

06:51I would gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today...

06:58Good morning, everyone!

07:03I would gladly pay you Tuesday...

07:06No deal, Wimpy!

07:07Oh, no!

07:08No more hamburgers for old Wimpy!

07:15Don't do that, dear boy!

07:17Why not?

07:18Why, just look at what everyone's lives would be like without you!

07:22Without you!

07:24Good job, Bluto!

07:26Nice hair, a bird!

07:29Bounce!

07:30Bounce!

07:32Thanks for curing cancer, Alice the Goon!

07:46Oh, well.

07:47Sorry for wasting your time!

07:48Huuu-

07:49OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

07:51HAMBURGAS!

07:52No-

07:53AaaAY!

07:53Im픈

07:54LIMPLE

07:54Uhhh!

07:54Let's go!

09:06Ooh, stick cereal.

09:09I gotta have some.

09:11Stupid bunny.

09:12Sticks are intended for children.

09:14Just give me a little.

09:15He touched me inappropriately.

09:16Couldn't stay off the sugar, right?

09:23But I can't help myself.

09:25My mother ate sugar when she was pregnant with me.

09:30You want to control the sugar?

09:32Stop using and start selling.

09:35Here, look this guy up when you're out.

09:37Rabbit, you're out.

09:39Really?

09:40But it's only been an hour.

09:42You in Alabama, fool.

09:44An hour's all you get for touching a child.

09:49Selling's a dangerous business, Rabbit.

09:52Killed the fruit brute, yummy mummy, even the cinnamonkey.

09:55I can handle it.

09:57Where's the stuff?

09:58Well, just follow my snout.

10:00It's never in doubt.

10:02Snout that big, it should know more than Einstein.

10:05Kill that mother f*****er!

10:29We'll just follow my snout.

10:35Wow.

10:36Do you have any idea how rich I'm going to be selling all this cocaine, sugar?

10:43I meant to say sugar.

10:46Sugar.

10:48Okay?

10:50Okay.

10:51Okay.

10:51I'm telling the bleeding boards will follow me around.

11:16And one little brother says, we're after your charms.

11:20So I says, forget about me blue diamonds.

11:24And worry about me blue balls, you whore.

11:28I never have any idea what you're saying.

11:36Bad news, boss.

11:37The Rice Boys are talking to the cops.

11:39Better to always talking.

11:41Okay, okay.

11:43I'll crink.

11:44I'll crinkle.

11:45I'll plop.

11:46The sticks rabbit made us sell the stuff.

11:50Uh, we only brought you in here because someone turned in your wallet.

11:59I must have lost it.

12:02Use the hollow point bullets.

12:10They're groovy.

12:17Their bones will stay crunchy even when soaked in blood.

12:21Ha ha ha!

12:22Don't shoot!

12:31I give up!

12:32He's giving up!

12:33Shoot him!

12:38Wait, wait, wait, wait.

12:41Oh.

12:44Finally.

12:46Stupid bunny.

12:47Sticks are intended for children.

12:50No!

12:52No!

13:14Fuck.

13:20Stupid monkey.

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