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Thirteen-year-old big brother Dylan feels like he's forced to spend time with his younger siblings and wants his time alone & also with his parents. He just locks his bedroom door so that his siblings can't get in his bedroom. Have you ever felt the same?
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00:00Let's take a look and see what family we've got here.
00:03Hi, we're the Young Family.
00:04I'm Joelle.
00:05I'm Sherman.
00:06And we have three children.
00:07Dylan, who's 13, Shermie, who's 5, and Shelby, who's almost 4.
00:12I'm a customer service representative.
00:14Sherman is a concierge.
00:16So most of the time, I have the kids at night,
00:18and Sherman has them during the day.
00:20When it's time for me to go to work,
00:22I have to take them to Joelle's work, and then we switch out.
00:25Kids are just out of control.
00:26Watch my other game!
00:30Stupid!
00:31Sherman, that's enough.
00:33You sit down.
00:33She was kicking at me!
00:35That seems frantic.
00:37Come on out there and play.
00:39Shermie is very aggressive.
00:41Hey!
00:42Shermie believes that it's his way or the highway.
00:44If he doesn't get his way, everybody's going to pay for it.
00:48Definitely very physical.
00:50Hitting, hitting, hitting.
00:52Shermie tells me he hates me and kicks me.
00:54Do not kick me!
00:56Shermie tends to be very aggressive with Shelby.
00:58He has hit her.
01:00There!
01:01Choked her.
01:02Shermie!
01:03Shermie!
01:04Whenever he wants to.
01:05That is one angry little boy.
01:06Let go of it, Shelby.
01:08Shelby can be very dramatic.
01:10She's stubborn.
01:12She does cry a lot.
01:13If you're playing a game and she decides she doesn't want to play it anymore,
01:16she'll throw it away.
01:17Shelby Murray!
01:18Ever since Shelby was seven months old, she's been climbing.
01:21No, no, no.
01:22Get down.
01:23Anything she can climb on, she climbs on.
01:25I think a lot of that comes from Shermie.
01:27He does the same thing.
01:28One of my biggest issues with Dylan is he's not very patient with the kids.
01:32He tends to go in his room a lot.
01:34Shermie wants to be with me all the time, but I'd like to have my alone time away from everyone.
01:39Come on, Shermie.
01:40You've got to come out.
01:41I'm exhausted, I'm physically exhausted.
01:43I know kids are going to be kids, but I would really like to just come home and have a happy family.
01:48We really need the Super Nanny's help.
01:50If we continue to yell and scream, I mean, nothing's going to change.
01:53You need to settle down!
01:55Super Nanny, we really need your help.
01:57Please.
01:58Oh yes, you do need my help.
02:01I'm on my way.
02:11Hiya.
02:12Morning.
02:13How are you?
02:14Good, how are you?
02:15Very well, thank you.
02:16Pleased to meet you.
02:17I'm Shermie.
02:18Come on, I'm Sherman.
02:19Nice to meet you.
02:20Who's these two little ones underneath here?
02:22Shermie and Shelby.
02:23When Jo first came in, I saw her focus was right on the kids.
02:28It kind of made me at ease.
02:29I'm Jojo.
02:30What's your name?
02:31Shermie.
02:32Shermie.
02:33What's your name?
02:34Get off me.
02:35Get off me.
02:36The children were just reserved.
02:38Hi, Shelby.
02:39They were just reserved.
02:40They were just observing me and doing what I normally do when I arrive in a family.
02:45Sherman, you know that I'm here today to be able to observe your family and I'm going
02:49to watch you throughout the day.
02:51Great, thank you.
02:52So where's your wife is?
02:54She's at work right now.
02:55Okay.
02:56So then she takes the kids back home.
02:58I go to work for the night.
03:00All right, so just switching over the pair of you all the time.
03:02It's like a kiss and bye.
03:05So it was Dad's time to look after the kids, but they were left to entertain themselves.
03:09These kids are bored.
03:10Dad was in his own little world on that computer.
03:24Shelby, stop!
03:25Hey!
03:26I'm going to beat you!
03:27Hey!
03:28You can't do that!
03:29Woo!
03:30Shelby, you better start going.
03:31It's all right, baby.
03:32I guess the yelling got loud enough because Dad got off from the computer and went and
03:37checked on the children.
03:38Sherm?
03:39I didn't do that!
03:40Why don't you make up the other one?
03:41You have to help me with some!
03:42The kids really wanted Dad to play with them, but he was just so reluctant to just join
03:47in and have fun.
03:48Can you help me with my children?
03:49Well, you know how to do it.
03:50And he passes them off with, oh, you can do it, you can do it.
03:55Uh-oh!
03:56You're going to break it!
03:57Please stop!
03:58Why do you do that to her?
03:59Would you go on time out?
04:00One, two, three.
04:02Okay.
04:03You want to apologize to your sister for hitting her?
04:04You say you're sorry?
04:05Enough!
04:06I'm a little bit confused here.
04:07Is he on time out or is he just refusing to kind of talk to you and be in his bed?
04:26Right.
04:27Yes.
04:28I don't think that I was the only one that was confused because discipline in this
04:31house seems make it up as you go along.
04:36Yes, so I can see the climbing monkeys.
04:40They climb up the door frames within the house.
04:44Uh-huh.
04:45They climb on the countertops.
04:47They generally do not listen to their father when he's asking them to get down.
04:52Please stop.
04:54They think it's a game, but this house is not a playground.
04:57Daddy, did you do it?
04:59All right.
05:00What do you find challenging for you as a father being at home with the kids?
05:03Joel can sit down with the kids and color with them.
05:06I'm not real big on that.
05:07I wasn't quite sure what he meant by that, but I can see that occupying the children indoors
05:11is a real challenge for him.
05:13You recognize how challenging it can be?
05:15Absolutely.
05:16I could sense with Dad that he's just trying to get through the morning and he's robbing
05:22himself of having fun with his children.
05:25And that's what I find a real big shame.
05:32Ready?
05:33Let's go get Mommy.
05:35Every day, Mom and Dad hand off the kids.
05:39In I go.
05:43Buckle up, champ.
05:44There's a lot of time pressure when we switch the cars over with the kids, because I have
05:48to be at work at a certain time.
05:50Boy!
05:51Mama!
05:52This exchange was absolutely crazy.
05:55Mom and Dad don't have time to talk.
05:56The kids were out of the car.
05:58I just can't believe they do this every day.
06:00Nice to meet you.
06:01Nice to meet you.
06:02My first time I see Jo, she's stuck in the back of my van with my kids.
06:06It was just a little funny to see that situation.
06:09Better get strapped in, please.
06:11Come on in, you guys.
06:15When we got back to the house, I had the pleasure of meeting Dylan, who is a very sweet
06:21boy.
06:22He really is.
06:23Hi, Dylan.
06:24Hello.
06:25Nice to meet you.
06:26Nice to meet you.
06:27Joelle, it's five o'clock.
06:30What goes on now?
06:31I'll do dinner and I try to either get Dylan to entertain the kids or they just kind of
06:35entertain themselves in the house.
06:36Okay.
06:37For now, I'm going to carry on and just watch you.
06:39No!
06:40Um, excuse me.
06:41Trouble started straight away.
06:43I'll get out.
06:44No.
06:45Shermie was doing absolutely everything to get into his brother's room, but Dylan didn't
06:49want him in there.
06:50Dylan doesn't want to play with you.
06:51Now, come on.
06:52Out.
06:53Out of Dylan's room for now until after dinner.
06:55Now, let's go.
06:56Out now.
06:57Out.
06:58Yeah!
06:59Well, then you don't get to come back after dinner.
07:01I just want to finish making dinner for the family.
07:05Had enough.
07:06Coming up on Super Nanny.
07:08Shelby!
07:09The kids push mom too far.
07:10In a minute, you're going to get a spanking.
07:12Now, that's not nice.
07:13Stop it.
07:14She's ready to call it quits.
07:16Now, let's go.
07:17Where you at right now?
07:21I'm ready to cry.
07:22When Super Nanny returns.
07:23When Super Nanny returns.
07:24Shermie clearly doesn't respect Dylan's space, but I wanted to speak to Dylan about how
07:33he felt about this.
07:34I thought I'd have a quick chat with you.
07:36Okay.
07:37Without the other little terrors in there.
07:40Yes.
07:41Disrupting our conversation.
07:44Shelby and Shermie are always coming in.
07:46You're like, oh, I want to play too.
07:48That must just really get on your nerves.
07:50It does.
07:51Really.
07:52A whole lot.
07:53Who deals with the children, then, when they're in and out, in and out?
07:57Mostly me.
07:58Mum and dad take care of it?
08:00Iffy, iffy situation.
08:03He does need his own space.
08:05He's a teenager.
08:06He's 13 years old and he's entitled to that.
08:09Do you feel you get enough time with mum and dad?
08:12Do you feel like you have enough time?
08:14I don't really think we have enough time because dealing with Shelby and Shermie cuts out of
08:18family time.
08:19Say, like, we're going to watch a movie and we don't get to.
08:22Dylan told me that he would really like to spend more time with his parents and that
08:27he doesn't get the opportunity to do so because they're so busy having to deal with his younger
08:33siblings.
08:34Now that's not nice.
08:36Stop it.
08:37And it doesn't surprise me.
08:38In a minute, you're going to get a spanking.
08:40Do you want a spanking?
08:41Speak to you later.
08:42Okay.
08:43Bye.
08:44Bye.
08:45That's very beautiful.
08:47Whilst I was in Dylan's room, Shelby made Shermie a really pretty picture.
08:52That's not nice.
08:54She made you a nice picture on her own.
08:56Sherman, that's enough.
08:59Do not rip.
09:02Sherman, Ray.
09:03Shermie held up a picture that Shelby drew for him and he mocked as if he was going to
09:09rip it.
09:10Put it down.
09:11Now.
09:19Sherman.
09:20Why did you do that?
09:22It's so typical of Shermie.
09:25He does that and hoping to hurt Shelby's feelings.
09:28Sherman, I'm going to spank you.
09:30No.
09:31You stay right there.
09:32You do not need to treat me like this.
09:35And I mean it.
09:36I felt like I was watching a wrestling match.
09:43I did not tell you to come out.
09:45The energy that was put into this fight was really sad.
09:48It was that bad that it was sad to watch.
09:51You are not coming out until you stay in here and you can behave.
09:52Get out.
09:53I beat.
09:54I'm just exhausted but I'm also very hurt.
10:06It starts to make me feel really, really bad.
10:13Where you at right now?
10:15I'm ready to cry.
10:17It kills me.
10:18Shermie drives his mother to despair.
10:21I feel like he hates me.
10:23You know?
10:24That's enough!
10:26And I don't know what else to think.
10:28I hate you.
10:29I wish you were dead.
10:30That comes out.
10:31How does that make you feel when he says that?
10:32You hear it enough times.
10:34It hurts.
10:35It kills you.
10:36It kills you.
10:39What time is dinner normally?
10:40Usually 6, 6.30.
10:42Finally the children settled down and the family gathered together to have dinner.
10:47But Shelby was in front of the television by herself.
10:50Why does Shelby sit at this table when you lot are at that table?
10:54We'd like her to sit up here but she'll eat her supper usually if she's there.
10:57So is it the chair or is it the television?
11:00I think it's both.
11:01This family are missing out on such an opportunity to come together and exchange words about how their day's been.
11:09I need to be able to change this as soon as possible.
11:15I'm pretty nervous what Jo's going to say to me because I already know what some of the issues are.
11:20But I know that I'm going to hear it straight from her which is a little more intimidating.
11:25You both work different schedules and I can very clearly see the sacrifices that you have made for making sure that you can provide that stability for your home.
11:41But the lack of respect towards the pair of you is never followed through with discipline.
11:54I see you Joelle fight with Shermie for over 30 minutes.
12:01Sherman.
12:02I'm going to count to five.
12:04One, two, three, four.
12:08The games you play with yourself are ridiculous.
12:12Your children don't know what discipline is.
12:15Is it the bedroom?
12:16Is it a spanking?
12:17Or is it one, two, three, four?
12:19What is it?
12:20Because I don't know.
12:21I never saw any.
12:22It's whatever seems to work which is nothing most of the time.
12:26How can you expect your children to meet lines of expectations when you set no boundaries?
12:32Your children climb up on the walls.
12:34They go on the countertops.
12:36They're aggressive with one another.
12:38They're in and out of Dylan's room.
12:40Constantly.
12:41That's why we put some locks on the doors which maybe isn't the right thing to do but it's very disheartening.
12:48But it's having to be done because you guys are not stepping up.
12:51They watch television when they want to watch television.
12:53They actually do what they want when they want to do what they want to do.
12:56Absolutely.
12:57Dad, I heard Shermie say at least five times yesterday,
13:03Dad, come and help me with the train track.
13:05Come and help me.
13:06And you were like, you can do it.
13:07You can do it.
13:08Now where was that coming from?
13:10I don't know.
13:11I just, I guess my priorities are not there.
13:14You have two young children standing in front of you saying, Daddy, give me some of your time.
13:22That's your role as a father.
13:27Mum, when you come home, it's like you've got boxing gloves on.
13:33You're ready for a fight.
13:35I think I'm just expecting one.
13:36You're like, right, I've got to get this done, I've got to get that done.
13:39It's about what you need to get done.
13:41But what you're failing to see is what your children need from you as well.
13:45And that is your quality time.
13:48And they don't get it.
13:52How does that make you feel then?
13:54Well, it makes me feel very guilty.
13:58Let's recognise what is the most important priority.
14:03And that is you spending quality time with your children.
14:08The question is, do you want to spend that time or not?
14:12I do.
14:14We do.
14:15We have three great kids.
14:17Very much so.
14:18But it takes hard work, it takes commitment, and it takes the pair of you working together.
14:25Right.
14:26Are we prepared to turn over a new leaf today?
14:28Absolutely.
14:29And start changing that for the better?
14:30Absolutely.
14:32That's what we want.
14:33Good.
14:34OK.
14:35So let's get started straight away.
14:36OK.
14:37OK, good.
14:38My feelings were hurt, but not because I took it personally what she said, just because I
14:42know a lot of the issues in my family are mine and Sherman's fault.
14:47Coming up on Supernanny, when it comes to discipline, Sherman's winning the battle.
14:53I don't know what to do.
14:54Now I'm going to end up chasing them through the whole neighborhood.
14:57Leaving Mom and Joe barking up the wrong tree.
15:00Sherman, I want you to come in the house right now.
15:05When Supernanny returns.
15:07But first, a tip from Supernanny.
15:10Hey, you listening to me?
15:12Shouting across a room isn't a very clear way of communicating or getting your point across
15:17now, is it?
15:18But coming down onto your knees and using eye-to-eye contact is to ensure that your children
15:23take you seriously.
15:36Hello?
15:37Hi.
15:39Hiya.
15:40Look what JoJo's got here for you all.
15:42The young family routine.
15:45That's right, Mum.
15:46So, Dad, when you're at home in the morning, your day's going to start from 8 to 9.30.
15:53And that's your time with Shelby.
15:55Take her to an activity, take her to the park, but let's see you getting out, alright?
15:59Okay.
16:00And then 4 to 5, the switch off with Mum.
16:04It's you guys switching over, and we are also going to make sure that you guys have got
16:10deeper communication by letting each other know exactly what's been going on in each
16:14other's days.
16:15Okay.
16:16Alright?
16:17And we will get to that as a technique.
16:18Okay.
16:19From 5 to 5.30, when you get back with Mummy, okay, into the house, you're going to have
16:26TV and video games.
16:27So you can watch television, and you can play video games.
16:30But if your behaviour is naughty, and you misbehave, alright, then it's going to be taken
16:37away.
16:38You understand?
16:39Yes.
16:40Sherby?
16:41Good.
16:42What I've got here are some no-zone areas.
16:48Okay?
16:49These kids climb on just about everything, like they're in a gymnastics hall, and I need
16:54to be able to change this as soon as possible.
16:56You guys are going to put these up in your no-zone area, where you're not allowed to go,
17:02and together you're going to decide where they are.
17:05No-go zones are a great idea.
17:08My kids are climbers.
17:10They climb on everything.
17:12You can't get up here to get into this.
17:15No counter.
17:16If you can reach it, that's great, but I don't want you to put your feet on here.
17:20You let Mommy and Daddy open up the door.
17:22And you don't run outside and just take off running.
17:25Dylan's bedroom is a no-zone spot, and Sherby and Shelby have got to learn to respect Dylan's
17:31privacy.
17:32When you see the red circle up here, it means that you're not allowed to go into Dylan's
17:39room.
17:40If you see this one, and it says, come in, you must not first and wait for Dylan to say,
17:48come in, or who is it?
17:50Not long after we put up the no-zone markers, Sherby decided to test them out.
17:59When he comes out for dinner, we can.
18:03Oh, the sign?
18:04Oh, the sign?
18:05Okay.
18:06Yeah.
18:07It is.
18:08It is?
18:09Okay.
18:10That's a good boy for not knocking them.
18:11Good job.
18:12At first, I wasn't sure if the kids would just think they were a toy and they could pick
18:16them and take them away, but they are paying attention to them.
18:20Later on that afternoon, Sherby was refusing to respect his mother and didn't come up from
18:28underneath that table.
18:29If you come here and talk to mommy...
18:30Mom, mom, stop.
18:31Right there.
18:32Okay.
18:33We're nipping this straight in the bud, and you're teaching your children right now how
18:38to talk to you and address you.
18:40Sherby, I want you to come into the kitchen and talk to mommy.
18:44If you don't, you will go in the naughty corner.
18:47For not listening to mommy.
18:48For not listening to mommy.
18:50So, take them to the corner, you explain, and you walk away.
18:56Come on, Sherby.
19:06Firm voice, mom.
19:07Sherby, I'm putting you in the naughty corner because you did not listen.
19:12You will stay here for five minutes.
19:14Sherby wasn't in the naughty corner for a minute, and he just bolted off again and refused
19:20to sit there.
19:21I don't know what to do.
19:25Now I'm going to end up chasing him through the whole neighborhood.
19:28I was really wondering if this was going to work for Sherby or not, because he's very
19:33strong-willed.
19:34And when I saw him bolt outside, even though Joe was there with me, I was thinking, oh,
19:41my goodness, this is going to be rough.
19:44I can climb the tree real fast because I'm a monkey.
19:50Sherman, I want you to come in the house right now.
20:02No.
20:03You tell him that if he doesn't get down from the tree, and if he doesn't come into the
20:07house, he's automatically going to lose his video game time, okay?
20:12Sherman, if you do not come into the house right now, you automatically lose your video
20:17time.
20:21Sherman, if you do not go back there, you will lose your video game privileges.
20:29Sherman got up, and he sat straight into that naughty corner.
20:33No chair on the corner.
20:35This is not a comfort spot here.
20:37It's not for your comfort.
20:38All right, Mom set the timer for five minutes.
20:43For the first time, he knew Mom meant business.
20:46I was completely surprised when actually it worked out where he did stay on that naughty
20:52corner for that whole five minutes.
20:54Sherman, Mommy put you in the naughty corner because you were not behaving like that.
20:58Because you were not behaving nicely.
21:00Now, I would like an apology, please and I will let you up.
21:05In the end, she did go back and get an apology from show me that was resolved.
21:10Coming up on super nanny.
21:12When it comes to getting the family outside.
21:15Shelby, should we get daddy to roll down the hill.
21:17Joe has dad on a roll.
21:19Roll, roll, roll, roll.
21:22When super nanny returns.
21:24When dad gets home, he normally ends up in front of that computer.
21:31So I wanted to make sure that he gave his children full focus and I sent them all to the park.
21:36They want to climb on the monkey bars.
21:41They want to swing on the swings.
21:43They want to do what they want to do here.
21:44Let them get it out of the system.
21:45Sherman and Shelby climb on absolutely everything because they need an outlet for their physical energy.
21:50So this is their playground, not the home.
21:53You could always say to her, I saw you on that.
21:55That was fantastic.
21:56You balanced really well.
21:57Shelby.
21:58I saw you do that, baby.
21:59Good girl.
22:00Yes.
22:01Shermie, Shelby, can you come with me?
22:07Because we're going to go over to that big hill over there.
22:09The kids were having great fun in the park and dad was looking on at them.
22:14So I gave them a nod and said, go and have fun with them as well.
22:17Shelby, should we get daddy to roll down the hill?
22:19Daddy, roll down the hill.
22:20Should we get daddy to roll down the hill?
22:21Roll down the hill.
22:22Roll down the hill.
22:23Roll.
22:24Roll.
22:25Roll.
22:26Roll.
22:27I think Joe was trying to get me to be a little more active with the kids.
22:31I can do what they can do.
22:33Oh.
22:35You know, I can get out there and play with them like the best of them.
22:38Come on, baby.
22:39And we put daddy down the hill.
22:43And he saw that they enjoyed it.
22:44So I'm hoping that it will encourage him to just be himself.
22:48Do what he wants.
22:49Because that's what matters at the end of the day.
22:51It was very fun.
22:52I mean, like I said, I did some things I haven't done in years.
22:59Okay, so between four and five, we've got the switch off.
23:04There isn't any time to communicate about your day.
23:09So we have this.
23:10Okay.
23:11It's a very simple idea.
23:12Before dad leaves, he reports about the day.
23:15He lets them know exactly what's going on.
23:18And then he leaves it with mom in the car to listen on the way back.
23:22Hi, honey.
23:23It's me.
23:24Just wanted to let you know we had a great day today.
23:26Breakfast went good.
23:27Went to the park.
23:28That was great.
23:29Shelby did take a nap.
23:30Shelby ate his snack.
23:31And Shelby did not eat her snack because I woke her up and went on her way out the door.
23:36I'll talk to you soon.
23:37I love you.
23:38Bye-bye.
23:39I think it's very important for Joel to know if they've had any privileges taken away.
23:43If they ate everything, you know, at their snack times.
23:45So she can go by that.
23:47How are you?
23:48Good.
23:49Hi.
23:50Hello.
23:51Oh, what's this?
23:52Communication device.
23:53Oh, it just lets me know what you did for the day?
23:55How cool.
23:56I was a little surprised when he handed me a tape recorder.
24:00And he told me that he kind of recorded what him and the children did during the day.
24:05And it was for me to listen to on the way home.
24:08We're at the park today.
24:09I got to roll down the hill about six times.
24:12But that was fun.
24:13I'll talk to you soon.
24:14I love you.
24:15Bye-bye.
24:16Daddy went down a hill today at the park.
24:18Did you have fun at that park?
24:19Yeah, I turned it on again.
24:21Okay.
24:22It's pretty useful, actually.
24:24Being so rushed, I am able to get a lot of information from Sherman on that tape.
24:29When the young families sit down to have dinner, they're all really quiet.
24:34So I'm giving them an opportunity to come together to open up conversation with a talking stick.
24:40What is this?
24:42That's something very special at dinner time.
24:45Is it magic?
24:46Sort of.
24:47Shelby, you want to help Mommy set the table?
24:49I want to do it.
24:50The children were so excited for the talking stick.
24:52Shelby left a little table to come up to the main table.
24:55Shelby's going to sit with us tonight.
24:57I was really surprised.
24:58Shelby sat at that dinner table and didn't even want to go sit at her little table.
25:01That was great.
25:03That is the talking stick.
25:06Okay.
25:07And every night, I'm going to give that to somebody.
25:10And they are going to think of a topic they would like to talk about.
25:13Dylan, I'm going to give it to you tonight.
25:15What is he doing?
25:16Well, you might be tomorrow night, okay?
25:18Me too?
25:19Yeah.
25:20Whatever he wants to talk about tonight, we're going to talk about, okay?
25:23School.
25:24What happened at school today then, Dylan?
25:26We watched like a movie and science and stuff.
25:28About?
25:29Parameciums.
25:30What is that?
25:31It's like these little cell things and they like swim around in pond water.
25:35What a change from the last meal time.
25:37Everybody was talking and listening and enjoying the conversation.
25:41Dinner with all five of us sitting at the table is really nice.
25:45With no TV on, just us talking is really good.
25:49It's great.
25:52When I was speaking to Dylan, he was saying how he would love to be able to spend more time
25:57with a pair of you.
25:58And because of the circumstances, it hasn't allowed him to do that.
26:02Before I leave, I think it's really important that Joelle and Sherman recognize that Dylan
26:07needs their time too, because he can't be looking after Shermie and Shelby all the time,
26:12so I'm going to set them a homework assignment.
26:14I'm going to do something fun, all right?
26:16I thought it might be quite a funny idea to just write an invitation down to him,
26:22like, Mum and Dad invite you to bowling, for instance, you know, for the evening.
26:27You know, just something quirky, but he may find that amusing.
26:30Okay.
26:31That'd be fun.
26:33Shermie, come and see me at the door and say goodbye to me.
26:37Shelby, come on.
26:38Come and give me a big hug.
26:41I'm pretty sure that while Joelle's gone, I think we will be able to pull it off.
26:45Dylan, I'll see you in a couple of days.
26:47Get back.
26:48I will.
26:49See you soon.
26:50Joelle?
26:51Bye.
26:52See you soon.
26:53All right?
26:54Yeah.
26:55Work together.
26:56Keep strong.
26:57You know you've got to be doing the Naughty Corner.
26:58Lots of praise.
26:59Okay.
27:00Okay?
27:01And remember, no confrontation.
27:02Okay.
27:03All right?
27:04Follow through.
27:05Be consistent.
27:06See you soon.
27:07Okay.
27:08All right.
27:10Bye-bye.
27:11Bye, guys.
27:12Bye.
27:13Those younger children are going to test Sherman and Joelle, but I hope that they really
27:15do stick to the techniques and take a little time out for Dylan, too.
27:18Coming up on Supernanny.
27:21Dylan puts the brakes on Sherman.
27:23I suggest you stop it.
27:25While Shelby's bad behavior goes full speed ahead.
27:29You do not hit me in the face with a doll.
27:32When Supernanny returns.
27:34But first, a tip from Supernanny.
27:36When you have children with a large age difference, it's all too easy to make your eldest a babysitter.
27:41But do remember, your teenagers need your quality time away from the little ones, as well as space on their own, too.
27:49Let's see if mum and dad are working on that homework assignment I gave them.
27:57When mum and dad came in my room, they had a makeshift invitation for me.
28:01And it said, Dylan, you are invited to bowling with mum and dad.
28:05It was really nice that they just decided to throw that card together instead of just asking me.
28:11Will you accept the challenge?
28:13Sure.
28:14Sure.
28:15That's really wonderful because Dylan seems so excited.
28:20You're first up, buddy.
28:25Ah!
28:27Almost.
28:32Bring it on.
28:34Oh, my God.
28:35Do we need to put the bumper thing on?
28:36Yes.
28:37The bumper lanes would be good.
28:39Oh, jeez.
28:40Yeah, mum.
28:41No one's smoking up.
28:42Uh-oh.
28:43That was good, Dylan.
28:45Perfect all the way.
28:46The thing that I enjoy about my parents is that whenever we get a chance to go out together, we have a blast.
28:52They just like to have fun.
28:53That couldn't have gone any better.
28:54Fantastic.
28:58It's really good to see the boys out together.
29:00I didn't call him a baby.
29:02Dylan, and Shermie, you guys are not supposed to fight with each other.
29:06I want you guys to play together.
29:07Maybe Dylan doesn't want to play.
29:09I think I'm forced to spend more time with Shelby and Shermie, and it gets a little frustrating after a while.
29:16You was being a little baby, and I got it first.
29:18Okay, Dylan.
29:19That's enough, son.
29:20You don't have to keep going on and on.
29:22I would just like to maybe have my own time.
29:25I suggest you stop it.
29:28You're not supposed to run into people.
29:31Oh, yeah.
29:32You said I could ride it.
29:33I went back there.
29:34Fine, whatever.
29:35Go ahead.
29:36I don't really know.
29:37I can see that Shermie's getting on Dylan's nerves.
29:39I don't even want you around me.
29:40Dad, maybe you should hang with Shermie and give Dylan a break.
29:48Pretty cool.
29:49That's good to see you spending time with the kids, Mom.
29:51Out of my way!
29:52Oh, no.
29:53You're going to sit here in this corner for four minutes because you broke one of our house rules, and that is no hitting at any time.
30:01Shermie was trying because I put him in the eye.
30:04Do not get up.
30:10Oh, boy.
30:14Is she trying to test you, Joelle.
30:17This is a naughty corner, not a playtime.
30:22Shelby, you go to that naughty corner right now.
30:28Shelby, I am not playing chasing you around this house.
30:33Don't engage with her, Mom.
30:34Just put her back.
30:35Shelby, to the naughty corner right now.
30:38You do not hit me in the face with a doll.
30:55Get in this naughty corner, and you stay here for hitting Mommy and for hitting your brother.
31:01Shelby's overriding your authority, Mom.
31:07You need to step up and sort this out.
31:09You throw one more book, Shelby Marie.
31:12Okay.
31:13No playing videos or watching TV.
31:15Mom, these empty threats are getting you nowhere.
31:22Don't.
31:23You.
31:24Dare.
31:25Hmm.
31:26Looks like she's got plenty to read.
31:35I knew when I came into the house and I saw Joelle's face, she was very upset.
31:39She was at the end of her line.
31:41I've done everything that I thought I should do or could do.
31:44And, um, I don't even know what to do anymore.
31:47Joelle, don't give up because I'm heading back and we'll sort it out.
31:54I'm pretty nervous about what Jo's going to have to say about the DVD.
31:57Because I went back into my old mode of being on the defensive.
32:01Let's take a look and see what we've got here.
32:03Okay.
32:04Whoa!
32:05Whoa!
32:06That was good, Dylan.
32:07We had a good time.
32:08It was funny.
32:09You so badly needed it.
32:10Great.
32:11Absolutely great for you guys following through with that.
32:12Thanks.
32:13I suggest you stop it.
32:14You said I could write it.
32:15I went back there.
32:16Fine, whatever.
32:17I don't even want you around me.
32:18What do you think about that piece of footage you've seen there?
32:19Jeremy wants to be around Dylan.
32:20He wants to be with Dylan all the time.
32:23And we understand that, you know, Dylan needs a space too.
32:24There's nothing wrong in Dylan having the children for an hour to play.
32:28But at the same time, we don't want Dylan to feel forced to be in the room.
32:33And we understand that Dylan needs a space too.
32:38There's nothing wrong in Dylan having the children for an hour to play.
32:43But at the same time, we don't want Dylan to feel forced to have to do so.
32:48Right.
32:49And he does need his space.
32:51If you throw one more book, Shelby Marie.
32:54Okay.
32:55No playing videos or watching TV.
32:58She's being very naughty there.
33:00But what she's trying to do is to get a reaction.
33:03Mom loves a bit of confrontation.
33:05She'll feed into it.
33:07Oh, and I did.
33:08I have no problem with you actually turning around and saying to her
33:11that she's going to lose the privilege of television.
33:14But what I am seeing here is you just, excuse the pun,
33:17but you're throwing the book at her.
33:18Absolutely.
33:19I was just trying to do anything to get that to stop.
33:22And, I mean, it just didn't work.
33:25Ultimately, what you wanted to do was to stop her from throwing everything on those shelves.
33:29You should have moved her away from that play area
33:32and put her into the corner in the kitchen there or by the back wall
33:37and carried on to what you were doing.
33:39Yes.
33:40Watching myself on the DVD was really a little bit of an eye-opener.
33:44So that's what I'm going to be working with today with the pair of you.
33:48Tweaking the techniques, put everybody back onto a positive level again.
33:52Great.
33:53All right.
33:54Any more questions?
33:56Okay.
33:57Let's start working again then.
33:58Okay, great.
33:59Thanks.
34:00On Supernanny, Shelby's at it again.
34:03You will stay here for four minutes.
34:05You need to sit down.
34:07But this time, will mom carry out Joe's plan?
34:11When Supernanny returns.
34:19Dylan has expressed to me that he feels totally obligated to look after Shermie and Shelby.
34:25So I wanted to make sure that he could express himself to his parents and I encouraged him to do so.
34:30I think it's really important, Dylan, that they know how you feel.
34:32Just to say to them, look, I'd like a bit of free time and stuff.
34:36And just tell them how you've generally been feeling.
34:39I had a lot of trouble talking with my parents.
34:41If I had problems, I'd keep it to myself.
34:44And I would hold it inside.
34:46The thing is, Dylan, is that when you tell your parents how you're feeling,
34:49you give them a chance to be able to change it for you.
34:52Mom and dad were eager to listen and Dylan was ready to talk.
34:55So I gathered them all together for a conversation.
34:58We can tell that you're very frustrated with Shelby and Shermie.
35:01And, you know, we understand that a lot of that is because we had you take care of the children for us.
35:06So how are you feeling about it all?
35:08As soon as you get home, I go out and give you a hug and come straight back in, you know?
35:13Because I think, well, I'm going to probably have to watch Shelby and Shermie and I don't want to do that.
35:19It's like coming here.
35:21Yeah, I understand that completely.
35:22And we really want to try to make things better for you.
35:25And that, you know, you're not forced or feel forced to take care of them.
35:29We're trying to teach them how to play together without fighting.
35:32And we're going to do everything we can to, you know, make everything better.
35:36I think he knows now that we're committed.
35:38Committed to making his life easier and, you know, the children's life easier as well.
35:43When it was time for dinner, everybody was ready to eat except for Shelby because she wasn't happy with the seat she was given.
35:51Shelby, do you want to sit there like a big girl?
35:53How do I make everybody happy in this seat?
35:57You can't. So you know what you do? I'm sitting here and Daddy's sitting here and that's how it is.
36:02And Mum was totally on top of it and she gave Shelby a firm warning.
36:07Shelby, this is your warning. You need to sit down and eat some dinner or you can go right back to the naughty corner.
36:16Come on, sit down.
36:18OK. Mum, I'm going to ask you to follow through with this.
36:20I think it's very important that you and I work together on dealing with Shelby.
36:25If Shelby started to throw those books again, then we were going to have to move that naughty corner.
36:31Once she was in the naughty corner, I don't even think it was just a few seconds even maybe, she started throwing books.
36:39So we're going to straight over and set her down in this corner.
36:41OK.
36:44So you're going to have to bring her straight down this pole here, straight down here.
36:48And she stays here.
36:49Mum is getting more confident at discipline.
36:52She's now recognizing what she needs to do.
36:55You will stay here until you are ready to tell me that you're sorry.
36:59Hoppy cat.
37:01I was very relieved that now I know what to do when Shelby starts her little temper tantrum in the naughty corner.
37:08And eventually she's going to learn. It doesn't matter what she does.
37:11I'm going to find a corner where she's going to go and she's going to stay there.
37:15Mummy would like you to tell me you're sorry. Come on.
37:18Come on. That's a good girl.
37:20That's a good girl.
37:21Right that long before mum has got Shelby behaving accordingly and diffuses those temper tantrums dramatically, she was calm.
37:30She was confident that she was going to be in control of the situation.
37:33And that reflected in her actions tonight. And so she got the positive result that she wanted.
37:40JoJo's leaving now. And I would love some little troops to come to the door and give me some big hugs.
37:46A big, big, big, big hug.
37:50Shermie. Bye-bye.
37:53Dylan, take care.
37:55I'm going to miss having Jo around. She was a lot of fun and we all love her.
38:02Dad, keep rolling down those hills.
38:04Yay!
38:06And mum, just keep stepping back, all right, and recognize. Don't fight every battle.
38:11Yeah.
38:12All right.
38:13Take care.
38:14Thank you very much.
38:15Take care.
38:16When Jo was leaving, it was sad because it was nice having her here for the support.
38:20But I know that it's okay because since she's been here, our lives have been a lot less stressful.
38:25Take care.
38:26Bye-bye.
38:27The family really took to Jo, and that's something we'll always remember.
38:31Bye.
38:32Bye.
38:33Bye-bye.
38:34Bye-bye.
38:36I'd like to say to Joelle and Sherman that I am very, very proud of your hard work.
38:41For your patience, your perseverance, and your courage, you've been able to change your family for the better.
38:49Joelle and Sherman are moving in the right direction, no doubt about that.
38:57Hey, Shelby.
38:58Here, put it up there, baby.
38:59Things in my family are beginning to change.
39:00The kids aren't as combative.
39:01You win!
39:02Before it was, put them in front of the television, and then that's where they stayed.
39:03All right, I'm going to count to ten, and then you guys all have to hide.
39:19Ready?
39:20Now we've got interaction with the kids.
39:22One, two, where could Shelby be?
39:26Shelby be.
39:27Shelby and Sherman are respecting my privacy a lot more.
39:30Mommy, the green sign's on there.
39:32I mean, they're paying attention to the signs.
39:35Whatcha doing?
39:36Homework.
39:37Doing his homework.
39:38I am good, and I'm going to listen.
39:41All right, Sherman.
39:42I learned a lot about Dylan, and now he's going to be more open with us.
39:46And I think I've done a lot, you know, with him, and molded him to what he's doing now.
39:51You know, he's a very mature, young individual.
39:54Start getting in the gym and working out?
39:55Yeah.
39:56Yeah.
39:57Hi, babe.
39:58I think I've changed by, you know, lightening up.
40:01Go to work, go to work.
40:02I notice I'm smiling more.
40:05I think it's a big improvement that the whole family sits at the table together and just enjoys
40:11everyone and has a really nice conversation.
40:14Very good.
40:15Happy play.
40:16I'm looking forward to enjoying our kids.
40:18Be very careful, though.
40:19And our children are enjoying us.
40:21That's the way.
40:22My stress level has dropped big time.
40:26Jojo, thank you.
40:28I definitely feel there's been huge improvements in our family.
40:32I think that it's definitely going in the right direction.
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