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Supernanny is here to tackle tantrums, fights and naughty kids all over the world! Have you ever given your parents a hard time? How do you compare to these kids?
Supernanny will help families get their behavior back on track- but it won’t be easy!! 😭 Expect lots of extreme tantrums, fighting kids and broken rules!
Supernanny will help families get their behavior back on track- but it won’t be easy!! 😭 Expect lots of extreme tantrums, fighting kids and broken rules!
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TVTranscrição
00:01Let's see what I'm in for this week.
00:04Hi, we're the Duan An family.
00:07I'm Forrest.
00:09I'm Angela.
00:10We have five kids.
00:12Christopher, who's nine.
00:14I'm breaking her heart.
00:16Don't you dare, Christopher.
00:18Isabella, who's eight years old.
00:24A set of twin boys, Lawrence and Benjamin, who are six.
00:30You got me, you stupid idiot.
00:33And little Charlotte, who's just turned five.
00:38The dynamics between the three boys is just constant fighting.
00:42Just very tense.
00:48Stop.
00:51Now that's bullying.
00:53Did you see that?
00:55Go to the car.
00:56The toughest time with the children is right after school.
00:59They go to Chinese school.
01:01They have soccer, golf, tennis.
01:04They also have art class.
01:06The older two have private piano lessons.
01:08Christopher also has another writer's workshop.
01:11There's a lot of pressure in getting them to the next place on time.
01:15I'm constantly on the road driving them around.
01:19Here's the plan, kids.
01:20When we get home, you wash your hands and do your homework.
01:23And I'm going to make dinner.
01:25And then I'll put your dinner in containers.
01:28And we can eat on our way to go pick up brother.
01:30Okay, guys.
01:31Go get in the car.
01:32We're going to eat.
01:33So do these kids live in the house or the van?
01:35So many kids, so little time, so many things to do.
01:40I end up having to yell and scream before they'll actually listen.
01:44Laurence, stop it.
01:45I mean it.
01:46Stop it.
01:47I mean it.
01:48You don't hate your mother.
01:49Stop it.
01:50Mom looks stressed.
01:52Forrest and I are both dentists and we own four offices.
01:57My working schedule is from Monday through Saturday.
02:01And I wish I'd have more time to spend with the kids to watch them grow.
02:05Hello.
02:06Hi, honey.
02:07Hi, Charlie.
02:12Because of his work and the other projects that he's doing, he is really hardly ever home.
02:17Okay, honey, I'm going to go upstairs.
02:19As soon as Forrest finishes dinner, he'll be like, okay, I'm done.
02:23See you guys, kid.
02:24And then just walked into the computer room and finds himself with things to do up there.
02:32We filled the house three years ago and we haven't moved in because Forrest is afraid that the children will tear up the new house.
02:40Like how they've torn up this house.
02:45Christmas!
02:46There's really something wrong here.
02:50I'm always mad at them and I look at their little faces.
02:53They're mad at one another.
02:54I need a miracle.
02:56Super Nanny, we need your help.
02:59Come now.
03:01Five children, over-scheduled and stressed.
03:05Yes, you do need my help and I'm on my way.
03:17Hi, Jo.
03:18Hello.
03:19Welcome.
03:20Hi.
03:21Come on in.
03:22Hi.
03:23Pleased to meet you.
03:24Welcome.
03:25Nice to meet you.
03:26Nice to meet you.
03:27Forrest.
03:28When I first arrived, I met Angela and Forrest.
03:30You have a beautiful teeth.
03:31Oh, thank you.
03:33That's the first thing I noticed.
03:35A smile.
03:36Yeah.
03:37Beautiful smile.
03:38There you go.
03:40You're gonna be on your way then, huh?
03:41Yes.
03:42Bye.
03:43When Forrest was on his way to work, Mum then informed me that we were all going to pick
03:48up the kids and so I got in the back of the car and decided that I would meet the children
03:53on their way home from school.
03:55She was a little bit worried, to say the least.
04:01Here we go.
04:02We pull up by the school and I wait patiently in the car.
04:06I learned.
04:07I learned.
04:08Close your eyes.
04:09I asked them to put their seat belts on and to turn around and nobody listened.
04:14Benjamin, sit down.
04:15Lauren, sit down.
04:16Turn around.
04:17You know what, Charlotte?
04:18Sit down.
04:19Put down the seat belt, please.
04:22Don't exit that way.
04:24So I sat there patiently, watching them all.
04:27Sit down.
04:28Hey, you sit down first.
04:31And then they really started to mess around.
04:34You're a liar.
04:36You're not.
04:37Laurence, if you're not going to buckle, you're getting out of the car.
04:40I told you.
04:41Hey.
04:42Because, Mum, because I can do everything I want.
04:48With that, Mum tries to distract them with a box of pears.
04:52Mum, I want pears!
04:54Mummy!
04:55Don't grab it from your sister.
04:57But, Laurence, give it back.
04:58Don't do that.
04:59In which they start throwing the pears at one another.
05:02And I realized this woman had no control.
05:07You're a liar!
05:08You're not!
05:09You know what?
05:10We need to go.
05:11Would you guys buckle up so we can leave?
05:12It's 15 minutes and we're still stationary.
05:17Stop it!
05:18Stop it!
05:19Stop it!
05:20Stop it!
05:21Stop it!
05:22Stop it!
05:23And then she starts to shout at the kids and tell them to behave themselves.
05:27And they end up laughing.
05:28Stop!
05:33When you've got your child at school all day and then having to race from one activity to
05:39the next, it becomes very tiresome day in and day out.
05:44Christopher is nine.
05:45After school activities a week.
05:47Golf, soccer, maths, Chinese class, piano and club scouts.
05:53That's 16 additional hours on top of school plus homework.
05:58That's so much!
06:00Honey, it's not this backpack.
06:02It's the other backpack.
06:03Going from activity to activity is quite stressful.
06:09And then I see Christopher arguing with Isabella and he spits straight into her face.
06:23Christopher, don't spit on your sister!
06:26She just broke down in humiliation, so upset at his behaviour and Christopher really didn't
06:35have any remorse.
06:36Then why did it spit on me?
06:38Because I kept my hands to myself.
06:41Christopher, that's...
06:42It's so cute!
06:43No, it doesn't.
06:45Isabella, just ignore him.
06:47And yet mum did nothing.
06:49Mum just continued to drive the car.
06:51I have no idea how to...
06:54Stop!
06:55Dad!
06:56I was just wondering, you spend so much time looking in your rear mirror, but how much
07:01time do you spend looking forward and driving?
07:04Do you feel safe?
07:05I feel safe.
07:06Really?
07:07Yes.
07:08Because right now I don't.
07:09Get it off!
07:13I saw the kids in the car behaving the way they were, and so I wasn't surprised when
07:25we got back to the house because their behaviour just got worse.
07:30And mum did nothing about it.
07:32Nothing.
07:33I don't think that Forrest really knows how hard it is for me, because he has gone to work
07:40most of the day.
07:41Just rinse it off.
07:42Stay right here and rinse it off.
07:44You feeling frustrated?
07:45You're feeling...
07:46Angry?
07:47Angry?
07:48I'm feeling...
07:49helpless.
07:50There's something very important from this piece of paper that's missing.
08:03So what kind of happens now?
08:05It's like nine o'clock and what would they do?
08:07Finish the homework?
08:08Finish the homework and I get them to bed.
08:09And then you get to bed.
08:10Right.
08:11Right.
08:12So no real kind of schedule, just finish the homework and then...
08:16Ideally I like them to go to bed right about now, nine o'clock, 8.30, nine o'clock.
08:21That would be ideal but we always seem to run late and so it probably gets really done
08:26about ten o'clock.
08:27Right.
08:28I think we can say that Americans are extremely enthusiastic in making sure that their kids
08:34do far too many activities.
08:36The reason these kids are up so late from finishing their homework is because they don't
08:39get home to at least 8pm from all their other activities.
08:43That's way too late.
08:45What do you do when you're not doing your homework?
08:49I don't know.
08:50Play.
08:51You get much time to do that?
08:52No.
08:53No?
08:54Why's that?
08:55My mum gives me too much stuff to do.
08:56She gives you too much to do?
08:58I'm always worried that the next day when the homework is due but I can't finish it because
09:04I have other activities that the teacher might get really mad at me.
09:09So do you get to do what your friends do?
09:11Do you get to hang out and have play dates as well?
09:14Uh, almost sometimes.
09:16Yeah.
09:17Yeah.
09:18Seeing the kids so stressed out with so much work that they had to do after doing a day
09:24at school was a real concern for me because I could see the impact it was having on the
09:28kids with the temper tantrums, the attitude, the tiredness, the crying.
09:33There's no room to breathe.
09:35There's no g-pad.
09:40Hello.
09:41Hi.
09:42How are you?
09:43I wish Dad didn't work so much.
09:48So eventually Dad comes home and Dad becomes the human jungle gym and it's nearly time for
09:56it.
09:58A lot of times that's pushing us late finishing homework and finishing all the work that they
10:02need to do before they can go to bed.
10:04Go finish your homework.
10:06I'm not going to pull you.
10:07Go finish your homework.
10:09The kids have so much activities.
10:11So when they came home, they still have to deal with a lot of homework.
10:15Then it creates a lot of emotion, a lot of temper.
10:19The kids are not listening.
10:21I don't want more.
10:22Can I ask, who disciplines them when it's the pair of you, but you don't discipline,
10:31you do then?
10:32I really usually do.
10:34What do you make of what she's just said?
10:36I don't see them that much.
10:38Yeah.
10:39I only see them like a half hour or an hour each day.
10:42So I think they might have some excuse to be a little bit wild.
10:49He told me how he doesn't have the time.
10:52Time is something that you have to carve in.
10:55And I don't really feel that Forrest understands that.
10:59OK, honey, I'm going to go do my, do my paperwork.
11:03OK.
11:04Because you said you wouldn't, you didn't.
11:11It's 10 o'clock.
11:12Already an hour past their bedtime.
11:14And they still haven't even finished their homework yet.
11:16It's going to be a late night for this family.
11:19So I'm heading out now.
11:20So guys, I'll see you all tomorrow, OK?
11:22See you all.
11:23Good night.
11:24Good night.
11:25Good night.
11:26Good night, Angela.
11:27Good night, Forrest.
11:28See you tomorrow.
11:29Having spent a day with this family, Mum's stressed out.
11:32The kids are stressed out.
11:34There's no discipline.
11:35Dad works too long a day.
11:38And the schedule is ridiculous.
11:41Absolutely ridiculous.
11:42And these guys need some structure and a good framework.
11:46And I can't wait to actually get talking to them
11:49and straighten this out.
11:57The first thing that I do want to discuss is the behaviour
12:06is out of control in this house.
12:08Completely out of control.
12:10They won't listen.
12:12They smart mouth.
12:13They have attitude.
12:15They hit.
12:16They punch.
12:17They do what they want.
12:18All of that's got to stop.
12:20Travelling in the car yesterday was the journey to hell and back.
12:25Christopher spat in Isabella's face yesterday and it turned my stomach.
12:36There is no discipline.
12:38There's no technique in place that follows through the lessons to be learnt.
12:44You act like this, this is the consequence.
12:48Because that is your job as a parent.
12:51And you're not doing it right now.
12:55We already know, Forrest, that you've said,
12:57it's because the last thing you want to do when you get home from work, right?
13:02Is discipline the kids.
13:03Mm-hm.
13:04You work very hard.
13:06You run your practices.
13:09Supporting the family.
13:11Financially.
13:12What are you giving emotionally?
13:15Try to just show them as much love as I can.
13:19And I try to put in as much time as possible as soon as I get home.
13:24Those kids don't get that time from you.
13:26They get half an hour if they're lucky.
13:30How much time do you spend sitting down with them?
13:34How much time do you spend up in the office?
13:36When actually, office should be finished.
13:40And now it's about you being home.
13:43I just need to cut back my working schedule.
13:47I think that's the only thing I can.
13:49And that's what's important here.
13:51Priorities, Forrest, right?
13:54Angela, why is it so important for you as a mother
13:58to have your children do so many activities in one week?
14:02Each child only has a few activities.
14:05Christopher has nine.
14:07Okay.
14:08And Isabella has seven.
14:10We both would like them to be exposed to extracurricular sports.
14:17It is good that you are exposing them to the opportunities
14:22that the world has to offer for them.
14:25But you've been unrealistic with your expectations.
14:28The kids are getting stressed out.
14:30We didn't realize that we're putting the pressure on the kids.
14:33We thought that we're doing a favor,
14:36making sure they're totally occupied.
14:38Making sure they're occupied so that we don't have to do
14:41what's expected of us as parents.
14:45You've used the classes as...
14:49Substitute.
14:51Yeah.
14:54But let's talk about the new house,
14:56not the one we're in now.
14:58To work so hard and to not move into your dream home
15:02for three years is ludicrous.
15:05I think it's kind of crazy.
15:07Yeah.
15:08But I really feel the reason behind that
15:11is because of how things are at home.
15:15I'm asking you to admit things about yourself right now
15:19that you need to change.
15:21So I'm here to help you and support you guys in doing that
15:23if you are ready for it.
15:25I'm ready.
15:26Definitely.
15:27Right.
15:28Let's go and start some work.
15:34I think it's absolute madness these parents are afraid to move
15:38because of their children's behavior.
15:40So this morning I've got a big surprise for them.
15:42Hi.
15:43Hi.
15:44How are we all?
15:45Really good.
15:46Are you ready for some news?
15:47Yeah.
15:48Yes.
15:49This is what we are doing right now.
15:58We are going to move into the new house.
16:02Yes!
16:03All right, good.
16:04Yeah.
16:05Fresh change, new house.
16:07Gonna fear the fear and do it anyway.
16:09I know that, you know, we do have to move.
16:11It just seems like it's such a huge task.
16:14I'm just dreading it.
16:16So what I have brought to you all are these.
16:20These are get-go bags, all right?
16:23And this one's got Benjamin's name on it.
16:25You all have one.
16:26What I want you to do is to put your special things into this bag
16:31so that tonight when you're sleeping there, okay,
16:35at least you have the familiar things around you that are special to you
16:39until all the rest of the boxes get unpacked.
16:41Moving home is one of the most stressful things a family can do.
16:43The get-go bag is a fantastic idea in allowing them to feel a part of the process.
16:56I know that Angela and Forrest are afraid to move,
16:58but this is their chance to put structure into their new home.
17:01Oh, look at you lot.
17:02Look!
17:03Oh, look at Charlotte.
17:04Somebody help Charlotte.
17:05She's struggling.
17:07I'm glad to move in a new house.
17:08I feel like dancing.
17:12Okay, you go over there and tuck it in more.
17:13Okay, you go over there and tuck it in more.
17:14I'm really excited to move into our new house.
17:19Because we have a larger space.
17:20Okay, let's go over to the house rules.
17:21Okay, let's go over there and tuck it in more.
17:24Okay, let's go over to the house rules.
17:25The children are very excited about moving into the new house.
17:30They don't know that we're going to have new rules and new expectations.
17:43I think that the kids are going to be in a bit of a shock.
17:46This here says house rules.
17:48This is what we are all going to follow in this house.
17:53In our new house, this is what Gary-
18:08Lawrence?
18:10Laurence come here dad the children over please
18:15I'd like you all to look at me, please because I'm going to say something
18:19Mom and dad are talking to you about the house rules. I'd like you to listen stay in one place and do as you're told
18:26Okay, this is your warning if you choose to not to listen
18:32To what I am saying right now that I am putting you straight into discipline quite stand up all of you, please
18:37Yeah, we are going through the house rules
18:43You don't have to respect the exterior we have to respect every corner of this house
18:52How's Christopher gonna listen to you Christopher listen here what I'm awesome. So look at you, okay?
18:59Look at daddy while I'm talking to you
19:01That's not right Christopher
19:05That's not right when dad mom talk to you you don't let's be this way
19:10Let me keep
19:11Disrespectful is he being disrespectful to you like that? All right
19:15So look at your father like that and support that face is being disrespectful. I'd like you to look at me, please
19:23You're gonna end up sitting on the reflection chair and being disciplined
19:28Christopher still showed attitude even after a warning. So now it was time for discipline
19:34Come down, please
19:35I'd like you to explain to Christopher why he's in this reflection chair. What is it that he didn't do?
19:41We want you to be a good kid
19:44We want you to grow up properly be a useful person to this up for the society
19:50That is that's definitely great stuff, but for now he needs to know what why are you saying here?
19:55You stay here for nine minutes you're here because you didn't listen to me. There's your book in there
19:59I'd like you to write down why and the effects of it, please, you know better
20:07The children do one minute per their age in the reflection chair writing about what they did wrong
20:13After the reflection chair the children go to the communication couch to talk about what they wrote
20:22Okay, when Jojo tell you when Jojo's talking and tell you to do something and you're not listening you do your own things
20:29Do you think it's the right thing to do no okay if that's the same thing you want people do to you when you're talking?
20:36Do you want to see that happen?
20:42What do you think now and what are you gonna do in the future Christopher?
20:46I'm gonna listen to Jojo and do what she says and what do what you and mom says and
20:54Again, let's hug
20:56Ah yeah
21:00Well done
21:03Thank you. That was a fantastic analogy. Thank you. And you sat down and explained and you asked him to look at you when you were talking
21:10That was fantastic. Thank you wonderful communication couch wonderful wonderful
21:16The rules and discipline firmly in place in the new home. It's now time to tackle the schedule this mom
21:27She's so over stressed and over scheduled
21:30But she doesn't even realize that her kids have over 40 activities a week
21:35That's the next thing I want to address you see that big mountain over there. I tell you what we're gonna do
21:40We're gonna see if we can hold what we do during the week, so mom and dad
21:46I want you to take what you see here and whoever it belongs to you have to give it to the child
21:52And you have to try to hold it, okay
22:07When Joe had the kids get all piled up with their activities and I looked at these poor kids and I said to myself
22:14What parent am I?
22:16Overloading the kids with so many things to do
22:19This exercise was to set up exactly how many?
22:25Classes you put your kids through every week. Can I ask you a question? Do we need to change the activities?
22:37The next thing I wanted to do was to come up with a new manageable schedule we are going to strip
22:43Some of those activities to create a new routine a schedule that allows
22:48Some fun time some down time some family time some rest no stress
22:53Okay, okay, but there will be some that you will have to keep and they'll be important that you do keep a mom and dad will explain why
23:01Okay, I'd like to ask you both
23:05To decide which are the mandatory ones the ones that they must do I think in Chinese you should keep right Chinese
23:15I hate Chinese school
23:17We are going to keep Chinese because it is part of who we are
23:22I know and I know what they will keep
23:23One day there. Thank you for it. One day
23:26They really want their kids to go to Chinese school so they can learn Chinese language and culture and be in touch with their Chinese heritage
23:34So now it's time for the kids to choose a few activities for themselves
23:38Isabella what are the lessons that you want to keep?
23:40Ballet
23:41You like ballet?
23:42What would you like to take up?
23:44Yeah, I like drum
23:45You want to do drum?
23:48You guys doing Cub Scouts?
23:49Yeah, I'm doing Cub Scouts and skating
23:51Even though the schedule is going to make everybody's life more manageable
23:57Mum's still struggling
23:59One thing we haven't discussed is the tutoring the language art tutor
24:03Which I think is important
24:07It's all too much work on top of eight hours of school work
24:11For him his his his English is pretty advanced
24:15But when it comes to individual writing nice sentences descriptive paragraph he's not doing it
24:21I know but it's nine years old it's not even in middle school yet
24:28It needs some breathing space
24:30As much as you're torn sitting there thinking I need him to do this I need him to do that
24:35If if we go ahead with that we're gonna be back to square one again
24:39It was a bit hard to give up a lot of these great activities
24:43But we're both willing to give it a try
24:47You know it is going to create more harmony not so much stress for all of you
24:51And you know you're it's not something that you're actually going to see in four weeks or five weeks
24:55You'll see that straight away
24:57And you're allowing space for you to spend time with the children
25:00So they can be around their mother so that you can enjoy
25:04Motherhood you know enjoy it because you wasn't enjoying it
25:09With the activity sorted out the family's going to be spending much less time on the road
25:14But the kids still need to behave with the time that they do spend in the car
25:18So I introduced mum to the car drill
25:20Why do we need to do this?
25:22You need to do this because your behaviour has been incredibly naughty
25:26And very unsafe in the car when mum's been driving you to your lessons
25:31So bad that you are very lucky that there has not been a car accident
25:36So with good behaviour and you listening to the car drill
25:40It means that we'll be able to have safe journeys to wherever we're going
25:45Okay, we're going to do one at a time
25:49Number one, where the kids sit
25:51Okay, I'd like you to give direction to the children where they're to sit
25:54Lawrence, I want you to sit in the seat behind mummy
25:59The main goal of the car drill is to make sure that mum's in control of the journey
26:03From start to finish
26:04And you establish this by going over the routine over and over again
26:08Once that's done, the children will know what's expected of them
26:12And they'll start to behave better
26:14Number two, take one game or toy with you, okay?
26:19Parents should always make sure that they've got something to keep their kids entertained
26:22When they're in the car, full stop
26:24Okay, number three is seat belts on and no standing up
26:28So, back in the car we're going to do one, two and three
26:31Right, the next one is going to be for you, okay?
26:33You're going to lay down the expectations of behaviour once you're in the car
26:37All of the house rules apply in the car as we're at home
26:44Can somebody else have any suggestions?
26:46No, you have to suggest, they're your rules, your driving
26:49There's no suggestions coming from them, it's all coming from you
26:52You need to make sure that you take your five kids to where they need to go safe
26:57They do as they're told
26:58Do you remember how manic it was?
27:00Do you remember how unsafe I felt?
27:03The idea is that setting rules will help the parents regain control
27:07But of course these parents have got to step up as well
27:10You're only in control if you behave like you're in control
27:15The last one is for you mum, okay?
27:19Stop the car if you are losing control
27:23So if these kids are kicking off in the back and you need to give a warning
27:27You're going to stop the car and you're going to turn around
27:30And look at whoever needs a warning
27:33Alright, so that they know, okay?
27:35Okay
27:40Listen, have fun whilst Jojo's away for a few days, okay?
27:43I want you guys to implement everything that we've learnt
27:46Make sure that we are following the routine that we have down
27:50Take care and I'll see when I get back
27:52Now it's in their hands
27:54Whether they step up and take control
27:56It's down to them
28:04After a few days without me
28:05I'm really excited to see how well they've done with the kids
28:08I hope that the new home has given them the fresh start
28:11That they've been waiting for
28:12Are we ready to take a look?
28:14Yes
28:15Right, okay
28:16I think what we should do
28:21Is we should
28:22We should make this really, really thick dough
28:25I think it's not too wet now
28:27We should probably put more flour in it
28:29There's more flour at the bottom
28:31Not the whole...
28:33Whoa!
28:34Look at it, it's erupting
28:37Look at it, it's erupting
28:38Look at it
28:39Look at it
28:40Look at it
28:41It's baking soda and vinegar
28:42That's fantastic
28:43The kids had fun
28:45They were able just to come together as siblings
28:48And hang out with you guys
28:50It's a lot of fun
28:51I haven't done this for a long time, quite a long time
28:53So you felt very rewarded yourself
28:55Yes
28:56Made it all worth it
28:57I feel like have a family life back
29:00There's a massive difference in the children's behaviour
29:05We've seen a dramatic improvement with Christopher's behaviour
29:09Because the activities have been taken out of the schedule
29:12Which has created a lot more contentment
29:15And yet, let's not forget about the major, major reasons that brought this all together
29:23And that is because we are now in a new environment as well
29:27We are now in the home that we wanted to be in
29:30You can just see, you know, how much more relaxed the kids are for it
29:34And you both as well
29:36And it's really made a difference
29:37You'd be very proud
29:41Lawrence, next time I do not need your help
29:44I want help
29:45Christopher
29:46When people have an intention coming to help you
29:48You don't talk to you that way
29:50You tell them nice
29:52They say, well, Lawrence, I can handle it
29:53It's okay
29:56Hey, hey, buddy, you need to take a deep breath
30:00What did you say?
30:01If her eye is at the front of her eye
30:03This eye is at the front of her eye
30:05Don't point at a mom
30:06It's a little bit this way
30:08No, we're not joking
30:09Christopher, you need to go into the reflection chair
30:12Okay
30:13Go
30:15Okay
30:16Maybe more consistent
30:18More consistent
30:19You talk to him, it's fine
30:20I don't mind to do it
30:22But if you
30:23Lawrence need reading
30:24Okay
30:25I go upstairs and you talk to him
30:28Love it
30:29You're both working together here
30:31You're both coming from the same place
30:32And Christopher is able to see that in full force
30:36Which is a major step for the pair of you
30:38So well done to the pair of you
30:39I'm very proud
30:40I'm just reminding you about what we do when we get into the car
30:45In the trunk
30:46Benjamin
30:47Now we have gotten into the car
30:49What do we do next?
30:51You can read this book
30:53Or you can wait until your sister is finished
30:55Which one would you rather have?
30:57Okay, I'm liking this
30:59You've kept nice and cool here
31:02There was some praise in the beginning
31:04And you've given the children choice
31:06Which is lovely
31:08Christopher, was she grabbing the book away from you?
31:11Okay, Charlotte
31:12That's a warning for you, Charlotte
31:14You need to ask nicely
31:16Okay, good to see
31:17Good to see
31:18Straight away
31:19You nipped it in the bud
31:20And you're given a warning
31:22What can I say?
31:23Fantastic
31:24Well done
31:25Let's move on to the next bit
31:26You're in the reflection chair right now
31:28Because you were yelling at your brothers
31:30Sisters
31:31No!
31:32I'm talking to you
31:33Alright
31:34I'm going to sit here
31:35And think about what it is that you did
31:37And how it affected other people
31:39You're going to write it down
31:40Okay
31:41I need to question here
31:42Because he's in the chair
31:43And you're talking to him
31:45Which is not part of the discipline
31:48Don't be talking with him in the reflection chair
31:51Correct
31:52If you ignore what he's saying
31:53Then he realizes your words final
31:55As soon as you start to talk back
31:57You show him you don't have that control
31:59It's a power and control thing
32:01With you and Christopher
32:02Power and control
32:03Okay, so this is our last clip
32:05I want my hot dog from yesterday
32:09You don't have to push my backpack
32:12I'm already done
32:14What?
32:16That is about all the other way it works
32:20But no one said you could do that
32:22Oh dear, let's just stop it for a moment
32:24It's enough to drive anyone bonkers
32:27He has learnt to communicate through whining
32:30And he needs to be set a very good example
32:34Of how to be able to use his normal voice
32:37To communicate
32:38So how would you show him the example?
32:41What does Christopher sound like when he whines?
32:43Mom, I want a sandwich
32:46I said it many times
32:48Exactly
32:49Exactly
32:50As soon as they see a grown adult
32:53Behaving how they do
32:55It becomes a comedy show
32:56But it allows us to set the example
32:58And show them exactly how they sound
33:00And then for you guys
33:02To only accept what he's saying
33:04When he does change his voice
33:06So having seen all of these clips
33:09Today what I would like to do
33:11Is to work with the pair of you
33:12And just really tweak everything
33:14So are we ready to get going?
33:16Mm-hmm
33:17Brilliant, okay
33:18So let's go
33:19So it's my last day with the Douart Arms
33:23But there's still a few things that I need to change
33:25First, Mom's still having problems with Christopher
33:28In the reflection chair
33:29Christopher
33:30Mom, I want to know what time it is
33:33There was a lot of communication happening on the chair
33:36Rather than the communication happening on the couch
33:39Mom was really feeding in to this back talk from Christopher
33:43At 54, he's finished
33:46So what time is it?
33:48And they really struggle the pair of them
33:51With this power and control
33:53Let's go to the communication couch
33:55And talk about what you wrote down
33:59Today I said everything to my mom
34:03So she sent me to my reflection chair
34:07So what was the last part of that Christopher?
34:09What did you write down?
34:10That made other people feel frustrated and angry
34:13When I had that behaviour
34:15Hmm
34:16I'm curious to know why
34:18Why don't you actually want your mother to feel frustrated or angry with you?
34:22Because it makes her mad?
34:26Oh no
34:27Your anger is now making people frustrated and mad
34:33So I am pleased to see because it shows me
34:36That you are fully aware
34:38This communication couch is incredibly important for the pair of you
34:43These are the conversations on this couch that allow our children to ask questions
34:48And for us to answer honestly
34:50It allows room for our children to realise that we're not unfair
34:55We're just doing what we feel is right as parents that we must do
34:59Good?
35:01Yes
35:02I'm very impressed with the progress this family have made
35:08However, just before I leave
35:10There's one little thing I need to fix
35:12What I want you guys all to really think hard about is the way that we speak to one another
35:19This is what Jojo hears all the time
35:22I want a drink
35:25I want my bath
35:27I think that my kids sometimes do whine to get attention
35:32I mean, isn't that what you hear?
35:34What do you hear, Forrest, from your children?
35:35What do they say?
35:36Mum, I want to drink you
35:38But I want to wear this dress
35:44It's easy for a child to adopt that whining tone
35:50When they are emotionally feeling upset
35:53Or feel that there's an injustice going on
35:56But then what happens very easily is that the child starts to adopt that as their normal voice
36:02Now, is that talking properly or is that whining?
36:05Yeah, whining
36:07So let's think about how we talk to one another
36:12And if you sound like this
36:15Then what mum and dad are going to say to you
36:18Okay, use your normal voice
36:21The kids laughed and we laughed ourselves
36:24So we realise it's unacceptable behaviour
36:28So can I get a big group hug before I leave?
36:32A big group hug!
36:34Thank you, Jo
36:36Thank you so much for helping us to make the whole family happier
36:41Ever more smiling on each body's face
36:44Thank you so much
36:46You're welcome
36:47Listen, keep up the work
36:48You know, you've seen what a difference that you've made already
36:52And just keep going with it
36:53Look at this little one, look
36:54She's passed out
36:55She's fast asleep
36:57Angela
36:58Thank you
36:59Take care, you're welcome
37:00Oh!
37:01Take care of yourself, okay?
37:03And just keep it up, keep it up
37:05I would like to thank Jo
37:07For coming to our house to help with all of us
37:11Bye!
37:12Bye!
37:13Bye!
37:14Bye Christopher
37:16Bye Benjamin
37:17Bye Phoebe
37:18Have fun in your new classes, alright?
37:20Enjoy them
37:21What?
37:22Enjoy them
37:23Bye bye
37:24I'll miss you JoJo
37:25Bye!
37:26Thank you
37:27Bye darling
37:28Bye bye
37:29Take care
37:30Take care
37:31I can
37:32Dinner time!
37:33Well mom, Sylvia, what do you say?
37:34Thank you mommy
37:35Thank you mommy
37:36Thank you mommy
37:37Forrest and I are together on the same page when it comes to parenting the children
37:51That there's a lot more communication
37:53We're definitely glad that we did move and everything else is behind us
37:57Wow Christopher, you have a good appetite
37:59I haven't eaten a so delicious thing in a long time
38:02Since Jo came in, the kids have been changed quite a bit, especially Christopher
38:08Grandma, you know what? Christopher was not in the reflection tree at all today
38:12Wonderful
38:13His temper is getting much better, Angela and I, we can see the change
38:18I think giving up those activities has been worthwhile because the children are a lot happier and we're having time that we can spend together
38:33These are the things that we've actually never done before, so it's a great experience
38:37I like JoJo
38:42I think JoJo is cool because she really helps our family to make a difference
38:51This family wanted the help, they were willing to really motivate themselves to make those changes
38:58So I walk away a happy nanny
39:01Thank you so much for helping us to make the whole family happier, ever more smiling on each body's face
39:10through the day in LA
39:12formerly cultivated
39:15We're in 1899
39:17We're in 1899
39:20We're in 1899
39:22We're outdoors
39:24eping
39:26We're in 1899
39:27We're in 14 Deus
39:29os
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