- 03/07/2025
Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00I'm not gonna dance for help today
00:07I might shake my feet to the beat
00:12But I'll shake them my way
00:14Cause sometimes they make me run too fast
00:18Sometimes they make me sing too loud
00:22But I'm only singing hard
00:25To kiss through the crowd
00:28I can do it
00:33Oh Pete, don't just guess
00:35I'm not guessing, I'm using common sense
00:37If you were using common sense, you would read the manual
00:40Mandy, I think I know how to tune a TV improperly
00:44All I gotta do is turn it from AV1 to TV
00:48Et voila
00:49Ooh
00:52I'm gonna have to look at that
01:11I've got waterproofs, I've got boots, gloves, what else do I need?
01:26Um, sunblock and some headgear
01:28Cause it'll be cold once we get out on the water
01:30Ooh, goodie
01:31That'll give me a chance to christen my new bobble hat
01:34Whoa
01:35So you liking it then?
01:40Yeah, it's cosy
01:41Right, you don't like it, you think it's nasty and horrid
01:43Not true
01:44I think it's amazing that you've managed to make a hat
01:48Like
01:49In such a short space of time
01:52Not many people knit nowadays
01:55Not many old people
01:56What?
01:57Um, it's just the
01:59Sorry, it's just what?
02:02Well, um
02:03It's just a little bit
02:05What?
02:07The biggest hat I've ever seen
02:09You can never just say I look nice, can you?
02:14Ow
02:18Hi, Ian
02:22Come on
02:23Come and look at Freddie's outfit
02:24Aw
02:26No, no, look at George's
02:28Look at his little ears
02:29Oh, look at your little panda ears
02:32Oh, hilarious
02:33Kind of got a bit creative myself
02:36Check him out
02:40He looks ridiculous
02:42That's really mean, you know
02:44That's taking it too far
02:45Yeah, you're totally taking advantage, Ian
02:46Oh
02:47Fine
02:51I'll go and change him then
02:53If only when you two did it
02:55When old Ian does it
02:57He's going too far
02:58Don't look at them
03:00Look at me
03:01Bravo, Zulu nine
03:05Bravo, zero nine, receiving
03:08Yeah, just to confirm
03:10I have a walkie-talkie over
03:11Roger
03:12Roger
03:13We are the fucking boys
03:17Over and out
03:18This guy pulls up in his mum's Cortina
03:22Yeah
03:22We spend the most amazing couple of weeks in France
03:24You're clearly a quick thinker, Andy
03:26It's not often you get to meet a superhero who drives a Cortina
03:30Girlfriend must be a very happy lady
03:32Actually, I'm single at the moment, you know, I mean, there was someone, but I thought we'd be together for a...
03:45Oh, yeah, of course she would, look at me, of course she would
03:58Pretty much
04:00He's so...
04:01Don't. Don't go away so well
04:03Take it to biggitig the ass!
04:07Sorry, mate!
04:09Take it to biggitig the ass!
04:11Limee-see!
04:14Limerick.
04:15Limee-see!
04:17Like!
04:23Do you like wildlife programs?
04:26I am filming documentary about the Emperor Penguin.
04:31Shhh! All of that!
04:37James, can we talk?
04:39Erm... Look, I'm really sorry,
04:42but I don't think that things are working out between us.
04:46What do you mean?
04:48I don't know what to say, really. Erm...
04:51But, well, the spark's gone, and I think that we should end it.
04:55I think it's been fine.
04:57Well, no, not really.
05:01I really... I think that we should look for somewhere else to live.
05:04Yeah, it's... it's great, yeah?
05:06I'm... I'm being deadly serious.
05:08I think that we should split up.
05:10No, you don't!
05:11I do!
05:13OK, it's not... it's not you, it's me.
05:16Yeah, that is rubbish. You are great.
05:19OK, then, actually, you know what? That is not true.
05:21It's not me, it's you.
05:22You sit around here all day playing these stupid computer games.
05:26I've got to see the screen.
05:28Just forget it. Forget it, cos I'm leaving.
05:30I'll see you later, babe.
05:33No! No, you won't see me later. That is the whole bloody point!
05:41Actually, why am I leaving? It's my house.
05:44Yeah, babe, did you have a nice time?
05:45Oh, for fuck...
05:48Don't you understand? It is over!
05:50Grrr, I am a monster!
05:52Grrr!
05:53Grrr!
05:54Oh, God! I could kill you!
05:55Oh, I could kill you first, and I'm gonna...
05:57Hmm...
05:59Mummy said we couldn't get you back for tea time.
06:01But we showed her, didn't we, Josh?
06:03Yes!
06:04So let's get this buggy packed up,
06:07and we can take you through to Mummy for your afternoon feed.
06:09Thanks, Josh.
06:10Where's Josh?
06:11Hi, can you see my bra through this?
06:12Uh, yeah.
06:13Can you see my knickers through this dress?
06:14Yeah.
06:15Okay, let's go.
06:16Okay.
06:17Let's go.
06:18Let's go.
06:19Let's go.
06:20We've got to be there by eight.
06:21Yeah, well, it takes time for a woman to get ready, you know.
06:22It's all right for you lot.
06:23You just whack on a deal.
06:24I'm going to take you through to Mummy for your afternoon feed.
06:25I'm going to take you through to Mummy for your afternoon feed.
06:26Where's Josh?
06:27Hey, can you see my bra through this?
06:30Uh, yeah.
06:31Can you see my knickers through this dress?
06:32Yeah.
06:33Can you see my knickers through this dress?
06:34Yeah.
06:35Okay.
06:36Let's go.
06:37We've got to be there by eight.
06:38Yeah, well, it takes time for a woman to get ready, you know.
06:40It's all right for you lot.
06:41You just whack on a DJ and you're done.
06:44Wow.
06:45New shoes.
06:46New necklace.
06:47You look quite spectacular.
06:50Thank you, my darling.
06:52What about the other thing?
06:53I don't know.
06:54I don't know.
06:55I don't know.
06:56I don't know.
06:57I don't know.
06:58I don't know.
06:59I don't know.
07:00I don't know.
07:01I don't know.
07:02I don't know.
07:03I don't know.
07:04I don't know.
07:05Darling.
07:06What about the earrings?
07:08Great.
07:09Superb.
07:10What?
07:11Just said they look great, didn't I?
07:13Yes, but you said it with that look on your face like you don't like my dress.
07:17Of course I like the dress.
07:19Um, maybe, maybe the earrings.
07:22What?
07:23Uh, maybe they're worth a little reconsider.
07:26I don't know much about fashion.
07:28Um, they, they look very classy, uh, and expensive.
07:33Um, they're just, just a little bit.
07:36Uh, don't take this the wrong way.
07:38Uh, not by much.
07:39Just a, a little bit closer to, to chandeliers than earrings.
07:51You can never just say I look nice, can you?
07:54Yeah.
07:55Oh.
07:56Do you want me to do it or not?
07:57Yeah.
07:58No.
07:59Yeah.
08:00No.
08:01Ow!
08:02Stop being such a baby!
08:03Bloody hell!
08:04I'm not being a baby, but come on, I'm a bloke.
08:05This is wrong.
08:06I know.
08:07Wax on.
08:08Wax off.
08:09Wax off.
08:10Wax off.
08:11Wax on.
08:12Wax off.
08:13Is that better?
08:14Yes, it's much better.
08:15Thank you, master.
08:16Wax on.
08:17Wax on.
08:18Wax off.
08:19Wax off.
08:20Wax off.
08:21Wax off.
08:22Wax off.
08:23Wax off.
08:24Wax off.
08:25Wax off.
08:26Wax off.
08:27Wax off.
08:28Is that better?
08:29Yes, it's much better.
08:30Thank you, master.
08:31Wax on.
08:32Wax off.
08:33Do you want to spend the night?
08:35Wax off.
08:36Wax off.
08:37Wax off.
08:38Wax off.
08:39Wax off.
08:40Do you want to spend the night?
08:41Yeah.
08:42Actually, I haven't got enough cash to get home, so...
08:46I haven't got enough cash to get home.
08:47I haven't got enough cash to get home.
08:48I haven't got enough cash to get home.
08:49I haven't got enough cash to get home.
08:50I haven't got enough cash to get home.
08:51I haven't got enough cash to get home.
08:52I haven't got enough cash to get home.
08:53I haven't got enough cash to get home.
08:54I haven't got enough cash to get home.
08:55I haven't got enough cash to get home.
08:56I haven't got enough cash to get home.
08:57I haven't got enough cash to get home.
08:58I haven't got enough cash to get home.
08:59I haven't got enough cash to get home.
09:00I haven't got enough cash to get home.
09:01I haven't got enough cash to get home.
09:02I haven't got enough cash to get home.
09:03I haven't got enough cash to get home.
09:04Actually, I think I'm a gay wife and I've got a child, he's blind, handicapped.
09:34Aye, aye. I know that look. Time for a bit of the old hanky-panky, if I'm not mistaken.
09:46No! No, it's not time for a bit of hanky-panky. In case you haven't noticed, we haven't had
09:53any hanky-panky for about five months now.
09:56Yeah, we haven't.
09:57No, we haven't, because I don't find you remotely attractive any more.
10:00Don't be daft. Come here.
10:02Christ! OK. Just look. Just look. Look at me. Look at me.
10:09Hello, gorgeous.
10:11You and I are finished. It's over. We are no longer.
10:16Don't muck about.
10:18Oh, James, please. Will you please just listen to me, please?
10:22I get it.
10:23You do?
10:24Yeah. I understand what you need.
10:29Thank God.
10:31You need a nice little massage.
10:38I don't want a massage. All I want is for you.
10:43Oh, you want something a bit more, yeah? Oh, I knew it.
10:46Oh, get out!
10:48Mwah!
10:49Bravo, Zulu Nine.
10:52Bravo, Zulu Nine receiving. Go ahead.
10:55Yeah, bravo, Zulu Nine. Just to reconfirm, still got my walkie-talkie. Over.
11:00Roger that. I also still have my walkie-talkie.
11:03Roger, roger. We are still the fucking boys. Over and out.
11:09Sorry, darling. I might have made a bit of a mess last night. I was pretty pissed.
11:20Christ, Susie, I'm so sorry.
11:28I have a Tipex pen hidden in my ass.
11:31Oh, we've heard that one already.
11:33Er, the sport of basketball.
11:39Lacrosse!
11:40No!
11:41Table tennis!
11:42Rally the way!
11:44Crazy golf!
11:45Oh, I love it!
11:47Millions!
11:48Ultimate frisbee!
11:49I have motorbike people driving in my trousers!
11:53I have motorbike people driving in my trousers!
11:56Thank you for fucking me!
11:58No.
11:59Oh, thanks.
12:00Take this left, actually.
12:01OK.
12:02Got a bit of fluff when you look.
12:03It's what you're doing, yeah?
12:04You've got a cat here, aren't you? It's right. It's completely massive.
12:05Please stop picking at me.
12:06I'm just saying you could have at least made an effort, that's all.
12:07Right.
12:08You know you've got newspaper print all over your face. There, there, and I think around the
12:14other side.
12:15Yeah.
12:16Yeah.
12:17Yeah.
12:18Yeah.
12:19Yeah.
12:20Yeah.
12:21Yeah.
12:22Yeah.
12:23Yeah.
12:24Yeah.
12:25Yeah.
12:26Yeah.
12:27Yeah.
12:28Yeah.
12:29Yeah.
12:30Yeah.
12:31Yeah.
12:32Yeah.
12:33Okay.
12:34Exactly.
12:35Yeah.
12:36Yeah.
12:37Yeah.
12:38Yeah.
12:39Yeah.
12:40Well, you've got newspaper print all over your face. There. There and I think round the
12:42other side.
12:43She looks a little bit like a street urchin as well.
12:44Park. Park here. Park up.
12:50That concludes the practical section of your driving examination.
12:54Have I passed?
12:55No.
12:59Don't.
13:01This has been sweet.
13:06He's not doing everything I want him to.
13:09The technology's quite new.
13:14Oh, God, I am controlling him with my mind, though, right?
13:17Yeah, yeah, yeah, definitely.
13:23Ha!
13:24I got you!
13:25Yeah, yeah, you did.
13:26You're big! You're big! You're big!
13:31Oh.
13:32And you should mention, actually, cos, er, Mum's been doing our family tree
13:36and, er, turns out I'm related to someone, too.
13:39Who?
13:40No, I don't want to say. I'm being a bit big-headed.
13:43Well, is it someone big?
13:45Kind of.
13:46Go on, mate. Who is it?
13:47Oh, fine. All right.
13:49Turns out that I am related to Jesus Christ.
13:54Jesus Christ? The Son of God?
13:57Amen.
13:58Oh, well, respect, man. That's all I can say.
14:01Respect.
14:02You must be well chuffed, you know?
14:03Whoa, sorry. No, Ed.
14:04You call me a cynic, but I don't think that Penny is telling us the truth.
14:08Whoa!
14:09Er, I'm sorry, Andy.
14:11Oh, OK. So you can walk on water.
14:14Don't take the piss.
14:16I'm not saying I've got the same powers as Jesus.
14:19I'm saying I'm his representative here on Earth.
14:21Right.
14:22And what I'm saying is that that is impossible.
14:24Nothing's impossible.
14:25Well, clearly, that is.
14:26Well...
14:30Clearly not.
14:31I've always felt there's a presence.
14:33Someone watching over me and protecting me.
14:37And now I know it's my ancestor, Jesus Christ, the Son of God.
14:43Ah.
14:44You know what, Andy? You're a bit like Judas Iscariot.
14:46Similar kind of vibe.
14:47Yeah.
14:48Why do you lot always have to hang around with people like us?
14:58Oh, don't be such a prude.
15:00I'm only having a wee, for God's sake.
15:03But...
15:04Oh, come on!
15:05When two people can share a bathroom without feeling embarrassed or uncomfortable,
15:09it's a sign of trust and mutual acceptance.
15:13OK.
15:14But who are you?
15:16Pamela.
15:17I live next door, number 12.
15:19Would you mind leaving?
15:21But I haven't brushed my teeth yet.
15:22Now!
15:23What colour tiles do you like?
15:24Uh...
15:25Any.
15:26What other ones?
15:27No.
15:28Why don't you use this together?
15:29All right.
15:30All right.
15:31Let me...
15:32Great.
15:33I like the blue ones.
15:34I just want the blue ones.
15:35I want...
15:36I want blue.
15:37Blue!
15:38Blue!
15:39I like blue!
15:40Blue!
15:41Blue!
15:42Blue!
15:43Blue!
15:44Blue!
15:45Blue!
15:46Blue!
15:47Blue!
15:48Blue!
15:49Blue!
15:50I like blue!
15:51Blue!
15:52Blue!
15:53Blue!
15:54Blue!
15:55Blue!
15:56Blue!
15:57Blue!
15:58Blue!
15:59Blue!
16:00Yeah.
16:01Yeah.
16:02All right.
16:03Blue.
16:04Yeah.
16:05We both like blue, don't we?
16:06OK.
16:07Um, now for the pink.
16:08What colour?
16:10Also blue
16:15I've got a ball for the outside light great great. Yeah, well, I'll fit it when we get back
16:27I got us a couple of steaks for dinner. Oh, ah great like steak matter be nice
16:35Oh
16:38Yes
16:40Um, I got my results back from the clinic
16:43They say I'm telepathic
16:46No way. No, that's mental. No, I'm telepathic the doctor told me this morning. You are joking
16:53I'm not honest. I'm telling you that
16:55That
16:57Hey
17:03Do you do you want to? No, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, you go first. Yes, okay
17:25Oh
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