- 03/07/2025
Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00I'm not gonna dance for them today
00:07I might shake my feet to the beat
00:12But I'll shake them my way
00:14Cause sometimes they make me run too fast
00:18Sometimes they make me sing too loud
00:22But I'm only singing out
00:25To get to the crowd
00:28Excuse me
00:32Hi
00:34How much are these?
00:36They're $13.90 each
00:37Okay, could we have...
00:39Nine or ten
00:40Yeah, nine or ten, same as that, please
00:41No problem, what's the occasion?
00:43We're getting married
00:44Oh, congratulations, you should have said
00:47These are wedding flowers
00:49Oh, they're lovely
00:51They're $46.70, not including VAT
00:55But they're the same, aren't they?
01:00No
01:00These are wedding flowers
01:04Yeah, but they're exactly the same flowers
01:07No, okay, let me explain
01:10These are normal flowers, just normal
01:13Oh, these are wedding flowers
01:15Like, yay
01:16Oh, I see
01:17So you just put the word wedding in front and charge four times more, is that it?
01:24No, it's just, it's just they're wedding flowers
01:26So what do you do to justify the price?
01:28Do they, uh, do they, uh, I don't know, do they, do they play the organ in church as well or something?
01:33Um, no, um, flowers can't play the organ, so
01:37Well, I'll have these instead then
01:39Wait, I mean, you can't, because I know they're for a wedding now
01:41They're exactly the same flowers
01:42I want wedding flowers
01:44Fine, we'll have wedding flowers
01:46Honestly, it is like your special day
01:49What?
01:50I know
01:50Oi, oi, you muppets
01:55Ooh, big night last night
01:59Massive
01:59Seriously, I think I might be approaching death
02:01Little liquid lunch, you'll be back in the land of living in no time, John
02:04I can't remember how I got home or anything
02:06Harry's in late, you notice that, eh?
02:09He's usually here by now
02:10Yeah, usually
02:11Hey, Pete, mate
02:13You seen Harry?
02:13What's up, mate?
02:14Harry, have you seen him this morning?
02:16Don't you remember?
02:18Er, I remember he was slaughtered
02:19Like we all were
02:21Hey
02:22Yeah, well, Harry was slightly more slaughtered than the rest of us, wasn't he, eh?
02:25Ah
02:25Don't understand
02:27Well, we had him, didn't we?
02:31We what?
02:33We had him, you muppet
02:34Oh, you muppet
02:35It wasn't easy, he was a big man, Harry
02:38I don't remember this
02:39Well, you wouldn't, would you?
02:41You were more hammered than the rest of us, eh?
02:43It's true
02:43He bet you you couldn't eat Harry's head
02:45He did it
02:46He ate his head?
02:48Yep
02:49Hey, no one in the office knows, do they?
02:53Good night last night, John
02:54Oh, I don't believe that
02:57That is, oh, God
02:58First week on a new job
03:00And I end up eating my supervisor
03:02That's, oh
03:02Hey, hey, hey, hey
03:04You were a man
03:05We've all done it
03:06What goes on tour, eh?
03:09Sweet
03:09That's my phone
03:10Um, a few beers again tonight, boys, yeah?
03:12Ho, ho!
03:14Go on, then
03:14See you down there
03:15Oh, wow, you've got so much equipment
03:25Yeah, do you mind if I put some music on?
03:27Oh, no, please do, yeah
03:28Okay
03:31Um, this is something I put together myself
03:37Brilliant
03:38The music starts
03:40The lights are on
03:43Are we ready?
03:45Are we ready?
03:47Are we ready?
03:49Break it down
03:50Mike makes love
03:54He likes to make love
03:57He winks at her
04:00She loves it
04:02She purrs
04:04He touches her breast
04:08It feels good
04:11It's made his winky go bigger
04:15His winky is bigger
04:18Oh, oh, yeah
04:19Now Mike's gonna come
04:22Mmmmm
04:23Mmmmm
04:24Mmmmm
04:26Mmmmm
04:28Mmmmm
04:29Mmmmm
04:30Mmmmm
04:31Mmmmm
04:32There we go, there we go.
04:36Thanks a lot for that.
04:38Huh?
04:38Mike is sleeping now.
04:40Please make your way from the house quietly.
04:42This is a residential area.
04:45Bye-bye.
04:46Um.
04:49Ooh, chocolate cake.
04:51Yes, please.
04:53I know it's a cliche, but it's true.
04:55All women like chocolate.
04:57Or not all women, obviously.
05:00How do you mean?
05:01No, I don't like chocolate.
05:03Um.
05:04I bet you do, really, though.
05:06No, I don't hate it, but I don't like it either.
05:09Okay, um, so you're really stressed out.
05:12You need some serious comfort eating.
05:14What are you going to have?
05:15Maybe I'd have a sandwich?
05:16No!
05:18I mean, you'd have some chocolate.
05:21I wouldn't.
05:21Yeah, yeah, I think you probably would.
05:24I really wouldn't.
05:25Yeah, you would!
05:25I'm sorry, I don't want to make an argument out of this.
05:34I just, I happen to be one of those women, probably in the minority, I admit, who just
05:38doesn't like to eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it.
05:48I don't like to...
05:49Don't wait, sit, no!
05:52Into my hand, into my hand, into my hand, in my hand, all of that.
05:55Put it in.
05:56Please, I don't.
06:00Oh.
06:01So I wanted to wear a flower in my hair, but then I started to think, oh, no, no, don't
06:16do that, because you'll look like a hippie.
06:17But then I thought, hang on a minute, this is our barbecue, and I'll wear a flower in my
06:21hair if I want to.
06:25Great.
06:26I'm not too sure about the dress.
06:27What do you think?
06:28The dress is great.
06:28You don't like it, do you?
06:31Of course I like it.
06:33The whole thing has a very summery vibe.
06:36It's a lovely thought for the summer.
06:39It, it's just...
06:40What?
06:41Well, it's just the, the, the, the, the flower is actually still in a pot.
06:51I beg your pardon?
06:53You have a flower pot on your head.
06:55You can never just say I look nice, can you?
07:04And one, two, three, four, five, and six, seven, eight.
07:08One, two, three, four, five, and six, seven, eight, four.
07:12One, two, three, four, step, step, step, step, step, push, one, stop, stop, stop, stop.
07:19Please, guys.
07:21You haven't got a clue what we're doing.
07:23Yes, you fatty.
07:25And big nose.
07:27You're spoiling it.
07:28Come to the front on your own.
07:30Come on.
07:30You said there'd be girls here.
07:36Hi.
07:37You all right?
07:38You got a pass?
07:39What?
07:40Oh, no.
07:41I, I left on the table.
07:43All right.
07:43Sorry, darling.
07:45You ain't going in.
07:46Look, Rob, don't do this.
07:47I have to pee.
07:47Oi, oi, oi.
07:49Unless you've got one of these, I ain't nothing I can do.
07:53Thanks a lot, Rob.
07:54Thank you very much.
07:56I wish I never bought you that stupid laminator.
08:00Oi, oi.
08:01What's that?
08:03Yeah, go on.
08:04In you go.
08:05Go on.
08:08Behave yourself.
08:11Just, um, just saying to Neil, actually, we were just talking.
08:14Do you remember that time we all piled in the fiesta and went down to Cornwall?
08:18Do you remember?
08:20It was just the absolute, you weren't there, Rob, but it was just the best holiday.
08:23And, um, and you had just had your hair cut and you hated it and you wore a hat for the whole holiday.
08:30Didn't you?
08:31Aw.
08:31I remember that.
08:32It was just the best days of my life.
08:34I know.
08:35Oh, yeah.
08:36I know.
08:37Oh, yeah.
08:38Do you sure?
08:39Well, I think you're going to say about the moniker taking the thing.
08:41Oh, I think.
08:42Sorry?
08:43Enjoy.
08:44Enjoy.
08:45Enjoy.
08:46Enjoy.
08:47Enjoy.
08:48Enjoy.
08:49Enjoy.
08:50Enjoy.
08:51Enjoy the moniker taking the thing.
08:52Enjoy.
08:53Enjoy.
08:54Enjoy.
08:55Enjoy the moniker taking the thing.
08:56Enjoy.
08:57The diesel engine.
08:58Enjoy.
08:59Enjoy.
09:00Darwinism.
09:01Enjoy.
09:02No.
09:03Daydream.
09:04Dance.
09:05That's right.
09:06Enjoy the moniker taking the thing.
09:08And then the robot dance.
09:11I have dismantled the robot professor and this is my victory dance.
09:18No.
09:19No.
09:20Oh, no.
09:21No.
09:22No.
09:23No.
09:24No.
09:25No.
09:26No.
09:27No.
09:28No.
09:29No.
09:30So, imagine the ball going through the middle of the posts and drive-through.
09:43Who's got a clever daddy, then, eh, Josh?
09:48Where's Josh?
09:50Johnny!
10:01How are you?
10:03Johnny, are you OK?
10:05Oh, sorry. Sorry, yeah.
10:06You do remember me, don't you?
10:08Yeah, yeah.
10:09Oh, my God, I hadn't seen you in age and I was just...
10:12What?
10:14Oh, no, no, no. It's silly.
10:15I thought about you and I was wanking this morning.
10:20Oh, right.
10:30So, er, what have you been up to, anyway?
10:34How long has it been? Is it five years?
10:37Five years, yeah, that's what I mean. That's why it's such a coincidence.
10:41What?
10:41Well, you know,
10:43I don't know.
10:45And half an hour later, I'll run into you on the street.
10:47Yeah, that is a bit of a coincidence.
10:54So, how is your mum?
10:57Fine.
10:58Do you know, cos I haven't seen you in so long,
10:59I had to try and remember what you looked like when we were in sixth form together.
11:02But now, wow.
11:04Tonight's going to be...
11:06No problem.
11:06Thank you. That's interesting.
11:10Oh, no, thank you.
11:12I won't go.
11:13That is weird.
11:21I'm going to ask him.
11:22Are you coming?
11:23Not a chance.
11:25But you can't say no, Simon.
11:27Not after my sales last month, you can't.
11:29Er, rubbish.
11:30Two years and no raise, it's rubbish.
11:33Don't say I didn't warn you.
11:34Yeah, well, there's nothing a little won't accomplish, so...
11:52Told you.
11:57Hey.
11:58What's with those guys?
12:01Oh.
12:02Yeah, they're fishing.
12:04To what?
12:08Fish.
12:09What?
12:11To eat them.
12:13What?
12:14When did they start?
12:16What?
12:17Fish, isn't it?
12:18Yeah.
12:24A while back?
12:26I've heard of it.
12:28Look, shit.
12:30Done it.
12:30Where did you think fish came from?
12:35Sorry.
12:36Hang on.
12:37What the fuck is a fish?
12:39You've been fished before.
12:42What?
12:43No, I have.
12:45Yeah, you have.
12:45On Monday night.
12:47The white meat with the batter.
12:49Don't we...
12:50We share a whiting.
12:52Whiting.
12:56Whiting.
12:56Whiting.
13:00Do I look like an idiot?
13:01Ha, ha, ha.
13:02Ha, ha.
13:03Ha, ha.
13:05Jesus, what's that?
13:09You...
13:09Come on.
13:10What you doing?
13:11It's got eyes, man.
13:15Hello.
13:16Hello.
13:16Hi, we're looking for a fairly large cake for a...
13:20Party.
13:21What kind of party is it?
13:22Just a normal run-of-the-mill normal party.
13:24Well, this one here should be suitable.
13:27Serves around 40.
13:29Um, how many people have we got coming?
13:31Do you mean to our wedding?
13:32Sure.
13:33Oh, my God.
13:35Oh, congratulations.
13:37Oh, no, you should have said...
13:38Hang on.
13:39There we go.
13:40That's, uh, 298 pounds.
13:43Isn't it lovely?
13:43Yeah, um, this appears to be exactly the same cake.
13:48Oh, no, no, sorry.
13:49No, this is our wedding cake.
13:50You see, it's even got the little tiny bride and groom on the top.
13:54Getting my look.
13:55Oh, my goodness.
13:56I don't want the plastic bride and groom.
13:58I just want the other cake.
13:59Right, no, sorry.
14:00This is our normal cake.
14:03And this one here, this is our wedding cake.
14:06I know.
14:07But all you've done is put a little plastic bride and groom on top
14:11and raised the price from 74 to 298 pounds.
14:15Well, no, because there is a ribbon round the edge.
14:17Don't want the ribbon.
14:18It's a wedding ribbon.
14:19It's just a ribbon.
14:20The ribbon is shit.
14:22So is the shitty little plastic bride and groom.
14:24Okay, do you understand?
14:25I want this cake here.
14:27Well, you can't now, because you've already told me it's for a wedding.
14:31Give me one reason, one reason, other than the shit ribbon,
14:34the shit man and the shit lady, why I should buy the same cake.
14:38It's not the same cake.
14:39The same cake at precisely four times the price of the other one.
14:43No, you see, this is a wedding cake.
14:44You see...
14:45It's exactly the same cake.
14:49Oh, no, do you remember we talked about the ribbon?
14:50I don't want the ribbon.
14:51I want the wedding cake!
14:53Fine, yeah, we'll...
14:57We'll take the wedding cake, please.
15:00He's so...
15:02I know he is a bit, isn't he?
15:03What?
15:03Nothing.
15:04I didn't say anything.
15:05I was just talking about the cake.
15:06It's a good choice.
15:09Hi.
15:10Frank and gentle.
15:13The environment.
15:18David Attenborough.
15:20No.
15:20It's not, it's not.
15:22Did you have a good time tonight?
15:27You completely embarrassed me in front of all of my friends.
15:30How's your little girlfriend, Laura?
15:31Hmm?
15:32Once you got in the garden, hmm?
15:33Oh, Laura, 45 minutes.
15:35Oh, Laura, oh, ha, ha, you're so funny, Laura.
15:38Oh, ha, look at your big tits, Laura.
15:40An old family friend I've known her for years.
15:42Have you?
15:43You are so predictable.
15:47I need your...
15:48Pit!
15:49Oh, I've got it here first.
16:01Oh, oh.
16:04You've a...
16:04You've a little bit of spit on your face.
16:06All the proceeds to the llama sanctuary go directly to the cause of making the llamas' lives more comfortable here in the llama sanctuary.
16:16It's great.
16:18It's great.
16:20Now, this llama's called Peter.
16:25He's not a very old llama.
16:28Well, sometimes he behaves as though he is.
16:32Say hello to Peter.
16:35Hello.
16:35Well, say it properly.
16:38Hi, Peter.
16:40Hello, Peter.
16:41How are you?
16:43Now, I'll introduce you to all the other llamas.
16:48One by one.
16:50That one's Gavin.
16:54He said there'd be girls here.
16:55That one's Adrian.
16:57That one's Keith.
16:58Why did he have to become so nice?
17:01Well, look, maybe the honeymoon period's over or something.
17:04Oh, exactly the same as me and Andy.
17:05Wasn't it?
17:06Six weeks are really horrible.
17:08It made me feel worthless, slept around, too busy to see me.
17:10And then all of a sudden, what happens?
17:12He becomes kind and considerate.
17:14Oh, God.
17:17Carl's never going to forget my birthday again.
17:19No, of course he will, Sophie.
17:21Come on.
17:21Oh, no, he won't.
17:22He'll remember it.
17:23And he'll probably plan a really nice day for me with really, you know, thoughtful presents.
17:28No, no, but he will still cheat on you, definitely.
17:30No, he won't.
17:32He won't.
17:33Oh, God, I just, I thought I'd finally found my bastard.
17:36And now he's become all romantic and loving.
17:39I mean, today, yeah, he called me from work and he loved me.
17:44Oh, my God, that's awful.
17:46Okay, so if I'm going to tell you something right now, you're going to have to walk away.
17:49Yeah.
17:50You know why?
17:50Because you are worth so much less than that.
17:53I know.
17:54All right, girls.
17:56Hello, babe.
17:58I've got you some wine on the way back.
18:01Rioja, your favourite.
18:02I took the liberty of ordering your favourite Chinese meal.
18:07So I'll just have to go and pick it up.
18:10All right.
18:11See you in a bit.
18:13See you in a bit.
18:13Oh, my God.
18:14Oh, my God.
18:14Shh.
18:17I'm back.
18:19How was it?
18:21Pretty good, actually.
18:22I've gone for something slightly different.
18:25What do you think?
18:28Yeah.
18:29I've had it coloured.
18:30Great.
18:33You don't like it, do you?
18:34Do like it.
18:37Colours, the colour's really good.
18:39You know, you know I like you, blonde.
18:41It's really nice of you to indulge me.
18:43Uh, maybe, uh, just around the ears.
18:49It sort of carries on down.
18:53Not sure I like the sideburns.
18:56You can never just say I look nice, can you?
19:05I am a Louise Parker.
19:07Take the...
19:08Oh, are you all right?
19:14Yeah, fine.
19:17Just give me a minute.
19:17OK, go for it.
19:27Um, I...
19:30Dad?
19:32Oh, don't you dare!
19:34Come back in!
19:40Colbertate!
19:41Feet!
19:42Fossil?
19:43Chrysanthemum.
19:44Cacophony.
19:44Cumulonimbus.
19:45Scalpel.
19:46Tippex.
19:47Musket.
19:47Durkin.
19:48Pickled durkin.
19:49Rice.
19:49Frame.
19:50Swing.
19:54Hmm.
19:55Oh.
19:56Hello.
19:57Hey!
19:57Um...
19:58I'm looking to buy a palm top.
20:00OK.
20:00Um...
20:02Oh, this is the smallest and most affordable of our devices.
20:06Um, I think it's really popular because of the...
20:08Ah!
20:08Ooh!
20:09Ooh!
20:09Ooh!
20:10Ooh!
20:10Ooh!
20:11Ooh!
20:11Ooh!
20:12Ooh!
20:12Ooh!
20:13Ooh!
20:13Ooh!
20:14Ooh!
20:14Ooh!
20:15Ooh!
20:15Ooh!
20:16Ooh!
20:16Right.
20:17Er...
20:17Do you mind if I...?
20:18Please do.
20:19I mean, it's fine, but it's just not really what I'm looking for, to be honest.
20:32OK, fine, fine.
20:33Let's have a look at this one. It's, uh, slightly more expensive, um, but it has got...
20:39Ooh!
20:40Ooh!
20:40Ooh!
20:41Ooh!
20:41Ooh!
20:42Mama caca!
20:43Ooh!
20:44Ooh!
20:45Mama!
20:46Can I compare the two?
20:47Please do.
20:48Arrgh!
20:49Arrgh!
20:50Arrgh!
20:51Arrgh!
20:52Arrgh!
20:53Arrgh!
20:54Arrgh!
20:55Arrgh!
20:56Arrgh!
20:57Arrgh!
20:58Arrgh!
20:59Arrgh!
21:00Arrgh!
21:02I think this one's better.
21:03Mmm!
21:04Mm!
21:05Do, Jackie, just to say, oh look, you're wonderful in every single way and tell you that I love
21:12you upon this special day!
21:13Oh!
21:14Mwah!
21:15Thank you, darling!
21:16What's that right?
21:17I must be the luckiest woman in the world.
21:20Mmm!
21:21I don't know how you do it every time you show your emotions in poetry like that.
21:27Look, to tell you that I love you upon this special day, I mean, wow!
21:31It just sums our whole relationship up.
21:35No, you're not actually getting this, Jack.
21:38I didn't write the poem. It was already in the card.
21:47What?
21:51That bit is typed.
21:55So you just wrote to Jackie, love, rich, kiss, kiss.
22:02Yeah.
22:02Oh, stupid, Jackie! Stupid, stupid, stupid!
22:07How long have you been passing this stuff off as your own work?
22:13I haven't. Oh, baby, come here. Come on.
22:17Oh.
22:18Oh. I'm sorry I upset you. Makes me sad and blue.
22:25My love is now and forever.
22:28To you, I am always true.
22:31Oh.
22:31Oh.
22:32Okay.
22:33Mm-mm.
22:34Yeah.
22:35Oh.
22:35Yeah.
22:36Yeah.
22:42Come on, man.
22:43Thanks very much.
22:46Excuse me.
22:47Hi. I just want to say I thought you guys were great.
22:51Um, and we were just kind of wondering if you're available for private hire, you know, for, er, for, er, parties.
22:58What sort of party, is it, mate?
22:59It's just, er, just a normal, normal party.
23:00It's, er, 150, flat rate.
23:02Brilliant. And can you play, er, Al Green's Let's Stay Together, like you did tonight?
23:06Oh, yeah.
23:07Oh, yeah.
23:08I've just always wanted to be played at my wedding.
23:09Shit.
23:10Oh, congratulations. Should have said, mate.
23:12Ooh.
23:13Right. So now you know it's my wedding, you can probably hike the price up to 900 quid.
23:17And even though you'll play the same bloody song...
23:19Calm down, mate. Calm down, all right? Don't charge any extra for weddings.
23:22Really? You don't?
23:23But you will get special songs, mate. You know, er, Lady in Red, Nice Day for a White Wedding, or, of course, a high horse, silver lining, everywhere we go.
23:36I don't really want any of those songs. They're a little bit, erm, shit.
23:40We know, but it's a wedding.
23:42It doesn't matter, because I just want the songs that you play tonight.
23:45What about the birdie song?
23:48No, absolutely no way. I don't want the birdie song, or the Lady in Bloody Red, or any other shit like that.
23:55I want Lady in Red!
23:57You don't even like Lady in Red.
23:59It's my wedding, and I want Lady in Red.
24:01Honestly, it's your special day, love.
24:04Yeah.
24:09Selfish.
24:10What?
24:13Come on, you Tay.
24:14Tay, have a sweetie matamash.
24:19Thank you!
24:26You said there'd be girls here.
24:36God, I'm so sorry I'm late.
24:40That's okay. We'll be late.
24:43Okay.
24:44Ooh!
24:45It's a bit chilly, actually.
24:46I'm sorry, I'm a jacket.
24:47Okay.
24:48Still a bit chilly.
24:49Oh!
24:50Oh!
24:51Oh!
24:52Oh!
24:53Oh!
24:54Oh!
24:55Oh!
24:56Oh!
24:57Oh!
24:58Oh!
24:59Oh!
25:00Oh!
25:01Oh!
25:02Oh!
25:03Oh!
25:04Oh!
25:05Oh!
25:06Oh!
25:07Oh!
25:08Oh!
25:09Oh!
25:10Oh!
25:11Oh!
25:12Oh!
25:13Oh!
25:14Oh!
25:16You're great.
25:17Thanks!
25:19Norm enough now?
25:21Yeah!
25:22Actually, you know, no!
25:23Er, it's my legs.
25:24They're freezing.
25:25Er, Jag, aw, son!
25:27Your leg.
25:28Your legs?
25:32Yeah, no!
25:34It's just...
25:35I keep there with my little hands.
25:37Give me the socks!
25:41I won't be late again.
25:45Can I just get some black eyeliner, please?
25:57Oh, sorry, I'm in a bit of a rush.
26:01Oh, for God's sake. Don't be silly.
26:05Let's just give the lady her eyeliner. Sorry, there.
26:09Oh, too slow. Try again.
26:11Do you want to take that? Will you just give it to me, please?
26:13Yes, sorry, yes. Oh, it's there.
26:15It's just one tip.
26:17Oh!
26:19See?
26:21Quickly. Will you just give it to me?
26:23Like a cat. Like a cat. Like a cat.
26:25Quickly. Quickly. Quickly. Quickly.
26:27Oh, close. Just grow up.
26:31That's it. Where's your manager? I want to speak to your manager.
26:33Yes. Man out.
26:37Hello, Ange. Yeah, there's a lady that wants to speak to you right away.
26:45Hi. Can I help you?
26:47Yeah, I've come to buy some black eyeliner and, er...
26:49...these two idiots...
26:51Won't let me have it.
26:53You two, you're always up to something.
26:55Now, what was it? A black eyeliner?
26:57Yes, please.
26:59Can I have that, please? Thank you very much.
27:01Whoa!
27:05Close. That's embarrassing, now.
27:07For you. Can you...
27:09Can you... It's over here. Could you just take it and...
27:11Oh, the boobs, boobs, boobs.
27:13Just piss off this.
27:15Oh, the lot of you.
27:17Oh!
27:19Look at this!
27:21You'll blow up.
27:22Throw it.
27:23Ha, ha, ha, ha.
27:25Ta-da-duck, ta-da-da-da-da-da- Laborator.
27:26Yeah, Dad is about too long...
27:27Yeah, this is the madman.
27:29I'll see you next time.
27:30forbidden saint
Recommended
27:58
|
Up next
27:49
27:54
27:39
24:32
29:44
29:00
1:04:05
1:06:12
50:02