Skip to playerSkip to main contentSkip to footer
  • 5/19/2025
Robot Chicken Season 2 Episode 10 Password Swordfish

Category

📺
TV
Transcript
00:00It's a boy!
00:30One, two, three!
00:38Ha!
00:39Paper beads fade!
00:40One, two, three!
00:42Ha!
00:43Rock punches nuts!
00:45One, two, three!
00:47Yaw!
00:48Scissors in your anus!
00:50I hate this game.
00:52Our Care Bear franchise is on the brink of collapse, corrupted by impure creatures
00:59that leech off our sunshine land.
01:03I'm talking, of course, about the Care Bear cousin.
01:06Care Bear cousin sucks!
01:08I may be love-a-lot bear, but I can hate-a-lot, too.
01:12We can no longer ignore the elephants in the room.
01:16Did I, uh, miss something?
01:18We must send them all to the great cloud keeper in the sky.
01:23Bedtime bear!
01:24Y'all know what time it is?
01:25It's bed time!
01:27And by bed, I mean ethnic!
01:29And by time, I mean cleansing!
01:31Care-a-lot!
01:32Care-a-lot!
01:33Care-a-lot!
01:34Care-a-lot!
01:35Stop!
01:36Wow!
01:37Famous character actor, Don Cheadle!
01:38You don't have to do this!
01:39I've built a hotel where the cousins can be safe!
01:40Yeah!
01:41We can keep the corpses in there!
01:42No!
01:43That's not what I meant at all!
01:44I loved you in swordfish, Mr. Cheadle!
01:45Can I have your autograph?
01:46Ah!
01:47Okay!
01:48I'm lots of laughs bear!
01:49And I've gathered y'all here today for a special happy celebration!
01:53If it's a special happy celebration, then why am I crapping a load in my drawers?
02:00We did it!
02:01We killed all the Care Bear Coffins!
02:02We killed all the Care Bear Coffins!
02:03Hurray for murder!
02:04Hurray for murder!
02:05Now let us start with the game!
02:06We have to do it!
02:07We killed all the Care Bear Coffins!
02:08I've gathered y'all here today for a special happy celebration!
02:11If it's a special happy celebration, then why am I crapping a load in my drawers?
02:20We did it!
02:27We killed all the Care Bear Coffins!
02:29Hurray for murder!
02:31Now let us celebrate our genocide!
02:35Get your party off!
02:37Whoo! Everyone eat some rainbow!
02:41Mmm, that's good rainbow.
02:47Jesus fucking Christ! It's the Great Cloud Gaper in the sky!
02:53Care Bears! I have watched your actions with great displeasure.
02:58But we purified the land of Care-A-Lot.
03:01For your dark and terrible deeds, I shall turn Care-A-Lot into a dark and terrible place.
03:08A hell on earth, I shall turn Care-A-Lot into New Jersey.
03:20Hello, I'm New Jersey's Governor John Corzine.
03:24I hope you've enjoyed this reenactment of our state's proud history.
03:28The Garden State.
03:30Come get in on some of this rainbow.
03:33Did you get it?
03:35Hey, nice shoes!
03:37Bet they'd look much better in my pants.
03:41Wait.
03:42I mean, are you from Heaven?
03:43No!
03:44No!
03:45No!
03:46No!
03:47No!
03:48No!
03:49No!
03:50No!
03:51No!
03:52No!
03:53No!
03:54No!
03:55No!
03:56Did you get it?
04:00Hey, nice shoes.
04:03Bet they'd look much better in my pants.
04:07Wait.
04:08I mean, are you from heaven?
04:11Because I've got an erection.
04:22Ach, Rob Schneider.
04:25If he wasn't so handsome, I would stop seeing his movies.
04:29Don't you agree, little Heimlich?
04:31Yeah, Papa.
04:38Look out, my Papa.
04:44Papa.
04:51Papa.
04:52No.
04:55And punch, and kick, and punch, and kick, and punch, and kick, and jazz hands, and punch,
05:07and good.
05:08Good, young Heimlich.
05:09You are learning very fast.
05:11Are you ready to face your deepest fear?
05:14Yeah.
05:19He's choking.
05:20He's a goner, Heimlich.
05:22Nein.
05:23He's practice.
05:26Hi-ya!
05:33Heimlich, that maneuver is the key to your greatness.
05:36You are ready.
05:37Heimlich, do the maneuver.
05:53Heimlich, do the maneuver.
05:57Heimlich, how can we ever thank you?
06:09Meat bratwurst and beer.
06:11And that is how I, Joel Schumacher, see it.
06:15It's always sausage with you, isn't it?
06:18Mary had a little lamb.
06:23Mary had a little lamb.
06:29Mary had a...
06:31...little lamb.
06:34Ricky, the doctors say the accident left you mute.
06:45Do you know what that means?
06:48It means you can't talk no more.
06:52But just because you can't talk, don't mean you can't communicate.
06:56Look what I got you.
06:57You'll wear this everywhere you go.
06:59Kick it over here.
07:04Hi, my name is Ricky.
07:07Nice job on defense.
07:09Hi, my name is Ricky.
07:10You suck.
07:12You seriously fucking suck, dude.
07:21Ricky, the doctors say the accident left you mostly deaf.
07:26Do you know what that means?
07:27I said, do you know what that means?
07:31Well, anyway, this is just another challenge, huh, champo?
07:35I got you these hearing aids.
07:40Hey, nice hustle.
07:41Hello, I'm hearing impaired.
07:45You kind of suck.
07:46Hello, I'm hearing impaired.
07:48Ricky, the doctors say the accident affected your brain.
08:00We don't really know what that means yet.
08:03But I got you these googly eyeglasses.
08:09We won!
08:11Howdy, I have brain damage?
08:12Three cheers for Howdy, I have brain damage.
08:15Hip, hip, hooray!
08:17Hip, hip, hooray!
08:19Wow, that was really something.
08:21Which kid is yours?
08:22Um, that fat Asian kid.
08:27Oh, my God!
08:29Jeffrey, we're out of ice cream.
08:32Look, Potter, I've taught the sorting hat a new trick.
08:50Virgin!
08:52Looks like Potter is he who shall not be laid.
08:57Guess the monster, Pubertus, hasn't caught up with you yet.
09:00Pubertus is just a myth, Malfoy.
09:03Second phase.
09:06Class, today we shall be learning spells which give objects the property of wood.
09:12Property of wood?
09:13That's happening to me right now.
09:16Pubertus.
09:17Professor Dumbledore, I think the monster Pubertus has cursed me.
09:22Yo!
09:23Who are you?
09:24Oh, Harry, it's me, Dumbledore.
09:26But Dumbledore isn't...
09:28Listen, I'm a different actor in every movie.
09:31Here, this might age you.
09:33It was your dad's.
09:34It's engraved.
09:36This handy stone fits in your palm, but only heat will turn it on.
09:41I know what turns me or Halle Berry is swordfish.
09:45D.V.D.ers pauses.
09:47Oh, no.
09:50What is it, Ron?
09:51The monster Pubertus has cursed me, too.
09:55He's even cursed scabbers.
09:57All right, you can stop now.
09:59What are we going to do?
10:00Let's ask Hagrid for help.
10:01Don't be ridiculous, Hermione.
10:03We need to confront the terrible horror ourselves and potentially end up hospitalized, like always.
10:09All right, just finish.
10:11Professor Snape, Perry and Ron have been cursed by the monster Pubertus.
10:16Pubertus, eh?
10:18Let's discuss this further in my magical jacuzzi.
10:24Barry White's scandal-litus girl excited.
10:29Get into my cellar.
10:31So, shall we play Put the Sorting Hat on the Slytherin?
10:39Pedophilius repel us.
10:41According to legend, Pubertus lives in this dungeon.
10:45Harry, I'm scared.
10:48You're always scared, you chicken shit.
10:50I can't help it.
10:52I'm a scared, pimple-faced, red-headed, chicken shit virgin.
10:56Ron, shush.
10:57Do you hear that noise?
10:59Here, Pertus!
11:02Hormonis Contrullus!
11:05Only heat will turn it on.
11:07I must have to rub the stone.
11:15It's worked!
11:18Quickly, hurry, rub it out again!
11:21Harry, rub another one out!
11:31Quickly!
11:32I'm rubbing as hard as I can.
11:34The stone is getting all chafed!
11:37Harry, I forgot to explain.
11:40The rubbing stone can only be used three times in a day.
11:44Four if you take a week off.
11:47Then how do we defeat Pubertus?
11:49Man, you can't defeat Pubertus.
11:52He lives inside y'all.
11:54Just as my own demon, Wanda Slimpus, prevents me from having meaningful relationships.
12:00Fuck.
12:27Fuck.
12:28Stupid monkey.

Recommended