Parentification Explained: What Happens When Kids Become Caregivers!

SunBro Health

Ever feel like you were the adult in your family as a kid? That might be parentification—when children take on roles meant for parents. This video breaks down the two types of parentification (emotional and instrumental), the signs to look out for, long-term effects, causes, and how to start healing. You’ll learn how parentification shapes your mental health, relationships, and self-worth—and what steps you can take to recover. Whether you’re realizing this now or supporting someone who went through it, this video will help you understand the impact and begin the journey toward self-compassion and healing.  References: https://www.webmd.com/parenting/what-is-parentification

Transcript

00:00Welcome back Sunbro, we hope you all in great health and great money.

00:04Before we start, please at least subscribe so we can have little money for food and paying bills.

00:09Alright, today we are going to talk about parentification explained,

00:14what happens when kids become caregivers. If you had to act like the adult in your family as a kid,

00:19that's called parentification. It happens when you take on responsibilities, emotionally or

00:23physically, for your parents or siblings. This can harm your mental health and lead to anxiety

00:28or depression later in life. 1. Types of parentification.

00:32Emotional parentification where you were expected to support your parent emotionally,

00:36listening to their problems, comforting them or keeping secrets. This is often the most harmful

00:41type. And instrumental parentification where you handled adult tasks like cooking, cleaning,

00:46paying bills or caring for others. It usually happens alongside emotional parentification.

00:512. Signs and symptoms. You might notice stress, anxiety, headaches or stomachaches,

00:57anger, aggression or depression, trouble at school or with friends, feeling guilty or blaming

01:02yourself, hiding emotions to avoid upsetting others, losing interest in fun or age-appropriate

01:07activities, substance use or emotional numbness, feeling more mature than your parent and being

01:13praised for being so responsible. 3. Causes.

01:16Parentification usually happens when a parent can't care for you properly due to

01:20divorce or death, illness, disability or addiction, abuse, emotional neglect or immaturity,

01:26financial stress and inappropriate emotional or sexual behavior. 4. Long-term effects.

01:32As an adult, you may struggle with trust or emotional connection, have low self-worth or

01:37unstable relationships, experience anxiety, depression or addiction and form unhealthy

01:42attachments or avoid expressing needs. 5. Real-life examples. Taking care of younger siblings,

01:48feeding, bathing, helping with school, managing the home, shopping, cooking, paying bills, caring for

01:54yourself, handling appointments or basic needs alone, mediating between parents and acting as your

02:00parents' emotional support or secret keeper. 6. Healing and moving on. Many people only realize

02:05the impact of parentification later. Therapy can help you process your experience, build healthy

02:10boundaries and reconnect with yourself. Helpful steps.

02:13a. Set clear boundaries. Know what you will and won't do for your parents. b. Tell your story. Speak

02:20about your past in therapy or support groups. c. Practice self-compassion. Let go of guilt and remind

02:25yourself it wasn't your fault. b. Reconnect with your inner child. Give yourself what you missed,

02:31freedom, care and the right to say no. You didn't choose that role, but you can choose to heal now.

02:36Thanks for watching, sunbro. Please subscribe, like, comment and share if you find this helpful.

02:43Come again to our next meeting sunbro.

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