- 18/05/2025
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FunTranscript
00:00When we got married
00:30In 60's Sanneilf, I love you
00:31In 60's Sanneilf, I said I'll do
00:37That's make me look younger, though.
00:53Take it off, that belongs to Rita.
00:55I always thought hair would suit me.
01:02When I look back, and I remember back, it did suit me.
01:08It does suit me.
01:13You remember when I had hair?
01:14I can't.
01:17My memory's not that good, I'm afraid.
01:21When I first met you, I had hair.
01:24Lots of it.
01:25So you say.
01:26I did, I did.
01:31Very black it was.
01:35Very black.
01:38And very shiny.
01:39It was greasy.
01:40You used to think I looked a bit like Clark Gable in them days.
01:48I never did.
01:50Clark Gable was a handsome man.
01:53I didn't say a lot like him, did I?
01:55I said a bit like him.
02:02Bigger than the both of us.
02:03I don't give a damn.
02:09Here.
02:12Look at that.
02:12With the glasses.
02:13John Lennon.
02:14She loves you.
02:17Anyway.
02:18People did say that I looked a bit like Clark Gable in them days.
02:23When I was younger.
02:25People used to say a lot of things about you when you was younger.
02:29If I'd had any sense, I'd have listened to them.
02:33I look a lot younger with one of these.
02:35I look 10, 20 years younger with this.
02:38I'll crack that mirror in a minute, we'll have bad luck.
02:43I could die the moustache, I suppose.
02:46Looks like it's dead already.
02:48No, it's a giveaway, that is.
02:56It's a dead giveaway to me, hey, Tess.
02:58No, I'd look a lot younger man if I'd one of these.
03:02I'm worried about Rita.
03:04I wouldn't have girls giving up the seats on buses for me if I'd one of these.
03:08She wrote to say she was coming down to see us and I haven't heard since.
03:12Well, phone her.
03:13She's not on the phone.
03:15Well, phone her at all of us.
03:16She only lives around the corner from them.
03:17She's always saying she'd take messages.
03:19In emergency?
03:21Well, it is an emergency.
03:24Where are you going?
03:25I am going over the road.
03:28They said we could use their phone.
03:30In emergency.
03:31So what's emergency?
03:38You'd let me go out looking like that, wouldn't you?
03:44What happened to Clark Gable?
03:46Oh, sorry.
03:47Oh, it's Mr. Garnet, dear.
03:50He wants to use the telephone.
03:53Yeah.
03:53Don't mind, do you?
03:54Is it the doctor you want?
03:56Is Mrs. Garnet poorly?
03:58No, no, no.
03:59Just want to phone my daughter, Rita, up in Liverpool.
04:01Liverpool?
04:02Yeah.
04:02Well, the missus said you wouldn't mind.
04:05Well, the missus said you wouldn't mind.
04:05You don't mind, do you?
04:07Of course you don't.
04:10I knew you wouldn't mind.
04:13No, the missus, she said you wouldn't mind.
04:15She said they're very nice people, them Johnsons.
04:18They won't mind.
04:20Very neighbourly they are, she said.
04:23Look like some people round here.
04:25At least they're Liverpool.
04:26Well, I did say if it was emergency.
04:28Oh, they're phoning Liverpool.
04:31Marvellous season, eh?
04:33Get through to anywhere on these now, can't you?
04:35Don't have to go for the up rate or nothing.
04:37Let's dance straight through.
04:44Marvellous.
04:45Yeah, brr-brr-brr.
04:48Liverpool.
04:49Brr-brr-brr.
04:52She loves you, yeah, yeah.
04:54Come on, come on, answer.
04:56They're marvellous.
04:57I mean, that's over 250 miles away, that is.
05:00I'd take you over four hours in a train with this.
05:02Straight through.
05:03Brr-brr.
05:04Unless you've got someone who's deaf when the other end.
05:06Come on.
05:08That's his aunt, that is.
05:10If she's anything like him, she's thick.
05:12We're all bloody thick up there in Liverpool, isn't they?
05:15It's the Irish.
05:16He's got all this Irish blood in them.
05:19Come on, come on.
05:21Probably searching all over the house for the phone.
05:27Probably forgotten where she's put it, eh?
05:30Oh, hello.
05:32Oh, yes.
05:33Who's this?
05:34Oh, yeah.
05:35It's Mr. Carney.
05:36Rita's dad.
05:37Can I talk to Miss Thompson?
05:40Your mum?
05:42Yeah, all right.
05:44Yeah, we'll go and fetch her.
05:46Yeah, all right, sonny.
05:47I'll talk to your mum.
05:48Yeah.
05:49There's a clown up for a book, innit?
05:50She ain't supposed to have children, she's supposed to be a spinster, maiden aunt, that one.
05:56Catholic, too.
05:57God, blimey.
05:58Before a priest finds out, she'll be on her knees the rest of her life, she will.
06:01Oh, hello.
06:02Oh, hello.
06:04Um, I want to talk to Rita Rawlings, please.
06:07Rita Rawlings?
06:08Your nephew's wife?
06:10Yeah, I know she don't live there.
06:12Um, can you...
06:13We'll pick up the...
06:14No, she...
06:14Turn it down.
06:16I know, I know she...
06:17She lives round the corner.
06:19Turn it down.
06:21No, not you.
06:22I'm asking them.
06:23I'm asking them to turn the telly down.
06:26No, I know you ain't got that telly on.
06:29It's here.
06:29The bloody telly's here.
06:32I told you I want to talk to Rawlings.
06:34Rita Rawlings, your nephew's wife.
06:37I know she don't live there.
06:39She lives round the corner with her husband, doesn't she?
06:42Stupid scut-lip.
06:45Well, I told you they were thick up there.
06:46The thickest two balls they are.
06:49When I brought in decimalisation in Liverpool,
06:51out to raise the school even though, he's a 35.
06:53No, I've not got the wrong...
06:57I have not got the wrong number.
06:59No, I haven't.
06:59It's the right number.
07:01I've got it written...
07:01Liverpool, 2550.
07:04That's not the wrong...
07:05It's the right number.
07:07I've got it written down in front of me.
07:09You dialled it wrong.
07:11Shh!
07:11What?
07:12No, I didn't dial it wrong, did I?
07:14I dial it...
07:15I know what I dial.
07:16I dial 051.
07:17That is a code for Liverpool, right?
07:19I'm calling from London, aren't I?
07:20I'll dial 051-25-50.
07:25You're what?
07:27You're 2...
07:282-5-6-0?
07:30Oh, no, you're not.
07:33No, you can't be.
07:36Look, I know what I've...
07:38I know what I've...
07:40Well, then, you've got the wrong number, haven't you?
07:43You are the wrong number.
07:45Look, I know what I've...
07:46I've dialed...
07:47I've dialed 2-5...
07:49Why would I dial 2-5-6-0 if I don't want 2-5-6-0?
07:53I know what I've bloody dialed!
07:55Well, there's something wrong with your phone, then, isn't there?
07:58I should.
07:59I should get it reported off, are we?
08:00Well, it's...
08:01It's not my fault, is it, if you was in bed?
08:04Well, I can't see into your house, can I?
08:06How did I know you was in bed?
08:07I didn't want to talk to you in the first place.
08:10Anyway...
08:11You've got to bed early, didn't you?
08:13It's only 8 o'clock.
08:14Well, I didn't know you was ill, did I?
08:20You don't sound ill to me, stupid, scarce geek.
08:25Wrong number, she says, wrong number.
08:27Look, I've got the bloody thing written down here.
08:30Well, she meant you dialed it wrong.
08:33Now, come on, Mrs. Dahl, Miss, really.
08:35I mean, I know how to dial a number, don't I?
08:38I wouldn't do that, would I?
08:39Dial it wrong.
08:40Here, Fred, you've got to come and check up on me.
08:42I've dialed it wrong.
08:43Make sure I put my finger in the right hole.
08:45Come on.
08:462, 5, 1, 2, 5, 5.
08:51Oh, dial it wrong, blimey.
08:53I didn't go to university.
08:54I can't dial a phone, can I?
08:55Hello?
08:55Oh, Miss Thompson.
08:57All right, Ms.
09:00Look, I want to talk to Rita, Rita Rawlings.
09:03Yeah, it's her dad, Mr. Garnet.
09:07Yeah, but I mean, can you nip round there?
09:10Well, it won't take you a minute, will it?
09:12Well, it's about her mum.
09:15Yeah.
09:16Well, take an umbrella.
09:18Well, you've got a raincoat.
09:23Where have you been living all summer, then?
09:28She's going round to fetch her.
09:30Wrong number.
09:31That's the right number, innit?
09:33Hey?
09:34Relations, I don't know.
09:35Supposed to be relations.
09:36Well, in-laws.
09:37Moaning, because it's raining, and I've asked her to pop round the corner.
09:40You can turn the telly up now, if you like.
09:42Oh, no, no, it's Des O'Connor.
09:43Turn it over to the other side.
09:48Oh, I like this.
09:54That's a nice fruit bowl.
09:59Them apples look very nice.
10:03Would you like an apple?
10:04I'll soon have a banana.
10:07Well...
10:08Them apples do look very nice, though.
10:11Oh, you are.
10:12You are.
10:18Here.
10:20That is a big box of chocolates, innit?
10:24Mr Garnett?
10:26Oh, thanks so much.
10:27Oh, they look lovely.
10:28Hold the mat up.
10:29Make sure we get the right now.
10:30The one with the squiggle, like the name, Nesta Coffee Cream.
10:32I like them.
10:34Right.
10:36Wrong.
10:36Excuse me, will she be long?
10:47What?
10:47Blimey, so the cure ain't them.
10:49It's all, like, liquid in who?
10:50So will she be long?
10:52Who?
10:53Oh, that!
10:53Oh, I forgot all about her.
10:57No, no, no.
10:58Shouldn't think so.
10:59It's only a couple of streets away.
11:02That's Liverpool, that is, you know.
11:04That costs a lot of money.
11:05Not anymore, it don't.
11:07No, no.
11:09Phone a friend, make someone happy.
11:12It's a lot I have, but I'm telling you, what was that?
11:14Busby, wasn't it?
11:15And what's her name, that?
11:17Irene.
11:18It's a...
11:18Tuck off all them funny voices.
11:20Andal.
11:21No.
11:23No, write a letter.
11:24Don't make a phone call.
11:26That's the other way round, isn't it?
11:27Yeah.
11:28Don't write a letter, make a phone call.
11:30Well, it costs a lot cheaper now, doesn't it?
11:33Don't have to get through the operate, you see?
11:36Anyway, operate, there's no bloody use of what was getting to your wrong numbers, wouldn't they?
11:39Dad!
11:40You're right, there's someone talking on there.
11:42Trying to get through it.
11:44Hello?
11:45Rita!
11:46That's your dad.
11:48Yeah, Mum, no, she's all right.
11:50Write as rain.
11:51Yeah.
11:53Got wet, did you?
11:55It's not raining here, first time in months.
11:59Hold on, darling, I'll go and get her for you.
12:01Hold on.
12:04Well, I'll just go and get the missus.
12:07It's my daughter, Rita.
12:09We'll talk to you if you like.
12:11I won't be a jiff.
12:11Where's he gone?
12:16He's gone to fetch his wife.
12:17He said that phone's connected up to Liverpool.
12:20She might hear you.
12:21What do I care?
12:21Is he playing for this call?
12:22I don't know.
12:23Ask him.
12:24I'm going to put it back.
12:25Oh, no, no, don't do that.
12:26Yeah, I'm going to put it back.
12:27No, don't.
12:28She's saying something.
12:29Well, answer her then.
12:31No, you answer it.
12:32No, you answer it.
12:32Now go and answer it!
12:34Hello?
12:35Rita?
12:37Oh, I know that's all right.
12:38It's not all right, it's not all right.
12:40Don't tell her it's not all right.
12:40No, tell her it's not all right.
12:42Oh, no, of course we don't mind.
12:45We do mind.
12:46Did it?
12:46We do mind.
12:48I don't mind.
12:49Did it?
12:49I don't mind so much I'm banging my head against the wall.
12:53No, at any time.
12:54Not any time.
12:55Never.
12:56Never, no time.
12:57They're coming.
13:00Well, blimey, let's go all the paint off our front door and all.
13:05I'm sorry about this, it's all right, you don't mind.
13:12Frank?
13:13Well, talk then.
13:16How long can I speak for?
13:19It's all right, Fred don't mind, do you, Fred?
13:22Here, Fred.
13:23I'd like to repay you for this, you know.
13:27Buy a drink or something, you know.
13:29How are you?
13:30Only, I don't like to offer you money, you know, because some people take that as an insult.
13:39I think a good neighbour should be appreciated, you know what I mean?
13:45And not took a varnish off.
13:48All right, look at her, enjoying herself, do you?
13:53Yeah, just give me a box of drinks.
13:55Walking away, loving it.
13:58Nice to see that is.
14:07Rabbit, rabbit, rabbit.
14:09Very nice of you.
14:13Nah, she's all right.
14:16She could be worse, eh?
14:18She's got stamina.
14:20She's after her.
14:22Good constitution, see that.
14:27In the long run, that is better than beauty.
14:30Any old day of the week.
14:31Yeah.
14:32But, listen, she's cost me money, you know that.
14:34She is, I'm out of pocket over her.
14:36I mean, if she'd have gone the same time as her sister Maud went.
14:39I mean, I'd have been a winner with the insurance that I've got on her, see.
14:44Really?
14:45Yeah, I'd have been laughing.
14:47Well, not laughing, is it?
14:48No, no.
14:49Nah.
14:50I mean, that is the gamble you take, innit?
14:53Yeah.
14:54I have paid out more on her now than I ever get back, but...
15:00I've got her, and I've got my little darling.
15:02See?
15:03Mind you, I wish I'd had a few bob on that sister of hers, that bloody Maud.
15:08I couldn't bloody stand her.
15:09What a cow she was.
15:10Oh, Christ.
15:11Well, I mean, I'd get on with most people, don't I?
15:12Yeah.
15:13Yes, I bloody do.
15:14We had nothing in common, me and her sister Maud.
15:15Well, I tell a lie.
15:16We had one thing in common.
15:17I hated her, and she hated me.
15:18She hated you much more than you hated her?
15:19Of course.
15:20No one hated her as much as her husband Wally hated her.
15:21I knew her.
15:22I knew her.
15:23I knew her sister, went to school with her.
15:24What's her real?
15:25Show you her knickers for a bite of your toffee.
15:26What's she doing?
15:27I mean, her funeral, her sister Maud shot, I don't think I've ever sat for anything
15:44what gave me more pleasure.
15:45I don't think it was the happiest man here, me or her husband.
15:49I don't know if it was the happiest man there, me or her husband.
15:52He was her husband, he must have been.
15:54Do you know what he done?
15:55Her old man, her wallet, he bought her the biggest bloody tombstone you've ever seen
15:59in your life.
16:00Must have weighed a ton.
16:01He said to me, Alfie said, do you know why I've bought her that?
16:05Right.
16:06Right.
16:07He said, because comes the day of judgement, he says, comes the day of reckoning we're
16:11all up there enjoying ourselves, I hope it's going to take a month's bloody years to shift
16:16that thing.
16:17Buy in time, that's why I'm doing it, Alfie said, buy in time, hoping Brian I'll have
16:22a little while up there in eternity, without her up there the bloody will ruin it, because
16:26I'll tell you something, Alfie said, you know, and he had tears in his eyes, honest.
16:29He said, Alfie said, heaven is all most of us poor people's got to hope for, he said, but
16:35if she do succeed in shifting that heavy piece of granny, that expensive piece of monumental
16:41machine that I've weighed her down with and gets up there to her and it won't be heaven
16:45anymore.
16:48She'll ruin it.
16:49So if she's ruined her, two up, two down there, so it's all it pissing all over the
16:51lavatory stuff.
16:53Oh, yes, and I'm sure, I'm sure God's going to put up with her.
16:56I mean, he may be a Christian, Alf, but if he's got any kind of class at all, he ain't
17:00going to put up with bloody mould up there.
17:02Well, I'll tell you something else, Alfie said.
17:04If he's prepared to put up with her, I ain't.
17:06I'm sad enough to have me have a place.
17:08I wish you would.
17:12The best funeral we had was down our street, was when old Mrs Fairclough at number 13 went.
17:19Well, she couldn't grumble, she had a good run.
17:22Ninety-five?
17:23Yeah, she was.
17:24Had her share of the old age pension before she went for his son.
17:27She did.
17:28It's an amazing coincidence, because I'll see her down the cemetery just a month before
17:33she went herself.
17:34Burying her eldest daughter, she was.
17:37Yeah, Winnie.
17:38That's right.
17:39I went up behind her.
17:40I had a little joke with her, because she liked her jokes.
17:42I went up behind her at the graveside and I said, here, Mrs F. I said, it's hardly worth
17:46you going home again, isn't it?
17:51She laughed.
17:52She bloody nearly fell in the graves.
17:56Don't you grab a smile, wouldn't you?
17:59What's the matter with you?
18:00Well, that's the true word spoken out.
18:03She had a good send-off, though.
18:06Went off in the rolls.
18:08That's right.
18:09Of course, she'd have preferred the horses, because she never liked cars.
18:13Yeah, well, I mean, it was grand in them days, wasn't it, Els?
18:16All them horses, four to a carriage.
18:20Black they was, Belgians.
18:21That's right.
18:22With them things sticking out of the top of their heads.
18:24Ears.
18:25Not ears!
18:26It ain't Els.
18:27On your leg.
18:28Goons.
18:29Yeah.
18:30Brits of Wales feathers.
18:32That's right.
18:33Everyone lining the streets.
18:35Caps off.
18:36Lines drawn.
18:37And they never started the horses trotting until they was at least three streets away.
18:46Not like it now.
18:49No.
18:50Now they can't wait.
18:52They just rush you off now.
18:54They even go through red lights.
18:57You know, if the corpse...
18:59Deceased?
19:00Or your deceased...
19:02No.
19:03...had a favourite pub, they'd pull up right outside and all go in and drink your health.
19:07That's right.
19:08Well, that wouldn't happen today.
19:09No.
19:10All them traffic wardens will give you a parking ticket.
19:13I'll never have any trouble with parking tickets from traffic wardens.
19:16Why is that?
19:17Why not?
19:18Ain't got a car.
19:20I can't hear you.
19:21Shout out and drink your pills.
19:23I had a good send-off, though.
19:26What?
19:27Mrs. Faikler.
19:28Yeah, go Mr. Salton.
19:29Yeah.
19:30Nugent's erased it very nicely.
19:32Yeah.
19:33Tea afterwards.
19:34Everything.
19:35Mm.
19:36Marvellous time to take old Nugent was, wasn't he?
19:39When you look back.
19:40He only had one drawback, old Nugent.
19:41What's that?
19:42Do you remember?
19:43He used to have a blooming great dewdrop hanging off his hands.
19:45Yeah.
19:46Yeah.
19:47He used to get longer and longer and longer.
19:49Scared the living daylights out of you, that didn't?
19:54Especially when he was slicing a ball down for the tea-hole.
19:58Tea-hole.
19:59He used to crack on me, haven't he?
20:02I always said, when it comes to a funeral,
20:05you've got a long way to beat old Nugent.
20:08Yeah.
20:09She laid in the house for a week before they screwed her down.
20:14And old Nugent, he made her look lovely.
20:17We did.
20:18Oh, Mrs Fairclough.
20:19She put her teeth in everything, didn't she?
20:21Yeah.
20:22Best I've ever seen her.
20:26Lying here, Arthur, in a lovely oak coffin.
20:30French polished beyond.
20:32Yeah.
20:33Glass handles.
20:34See your face in them.
20:36Little bit of blue velvet.
20:38Lined throughout.
20:39What a wonderful way to go.
20:42Yeah.
20:43See, they'd agreed it all beforehand before she snuffed it.
20:46Well, you could do that in them days.
20:47Yeah.
20:48Your funeral club.
20:49That's right.
20:50Yeah, well, you could plan them yourself, you see.
20:52Tell them how you wanted it.
20:53Oh, yeah.
20:54I mean, they used to say to them, do you want to be burnt or buried?
20:57Right.
20:58Because burnt's cheaper.
20:59Of course.
21:00Yeah, well, all the land values have gone up, you see.
21:02Oh, yeah, that's right.
21:03It's more profitable building houses than it is graves.
21:05Oh, no.
21:06I mean, houses create wealth.
21:07That's right.
21:08People are always buying and selling and moving in and out.
21:10Don't do that with graves.
21:12No movement of graves.
21:13No movement of graves.
21:14It's a dead business.
21:15We had a plot for my mother.
21:20Yeah?
21:21Yeah.
21:22It was smart, clean and decent when we first come.
21:27When we buried my father in it.
21:29Yeah.
21:30You should see it now.
21:32We had to bury my mother in it a few weeks ago.
21:35Oh, you should see it now.
21:37Disgusting it is.
21:39You think it was pigs buried there.
21:41No, aren't you?
21:42No, aren't you?
21:43No, aren't you?
21:44No, aren't you?
21:45No, aren't you?
21:46Cremation's best.
21:47That's what I say.
21:48Yeah.
21:49At least you'll get your own jar.
21:50Yeah.
21:51All right.
21:52Earn.
21:53At least you're on your own.
21:58I'm Catholic.
22:00Yeah.
22:01And we don't have cremation.
22:04We're not allowed it, see.
22:06No.
22:07Well, if you're a Catholic, you've got to go up to heaven
22:10as you was down here.
22:12All in one piece, like.
22:14Well, you can't have transplants, then.
22:16Not if you're Catholic.
22:19Well, I don't know.
22:21No, I mean, not if you've got to go up there in one piece,
22:24you know.
22:25As you was down here.
22:26I mean, you go up there with borrowed bits of someone else.
22:28Whoa.
22:29Ain't you, is it?
22:31Well, I mean, as long as he can see it's you,
22:41as long as he can see it's you, if you've lived a life of grace and purity.
22:46Like you.
22:47Grace and purity, according to his teachings down here.
22:51Yeah.
22:52Well, I mean, when you go to heaven to get your reward, like,
22:56well, you want to be recognised, don't you?
22:59Well, you're right.
23:00She is right.
23:01Well, so as long as he's able to see that it's you,
23:04you see,
23:06as long as he can see it's you,
23:09well, I mean, you don't want to get what you've earned
23:12been given to somebody else, do you, like?
23:14No, that is right.
23:15That's right, Millie.
23:16Well, what about pacemakers then, Alfred?
23:18Well, they can't.
23:19What do you mean, like, that's part of yourself, Alfred?
23:21Yeah.
23:22Well, no, I mean, I think,
23:25no, they'd take them out before they bury you, wouldn't they?
23:28They would, or before they barbecue you.
23:30I mean, it's like...
23:32It's like a car, you see.
23:34I mean, when you're going to scrap a car,
23:35well, they take all the good bits out,
23:37any bits that are still working,
23:38and bung them into something else.
23:39Of course not.
23:40You ain't got a pacemaker, have you, Alfred?
23:42No, no, no,
23:43but they're talking about giving the missus one.
23:45Are they?
23:46Well, listen,
23:47before you lay out any money on that,
23:49you let them give her a trial run with it, you know?
23:51Yeah, right.
23:52I mean, you know,
23:53let her go up and down a few hills,
23:54put her out a bit of steel,
23:55put her out,
23:56put her out jogging, you know?
23:58I mean,
23:59why don't you go see some of the undertakers?
24:02Undertakers?
24:03Yeah, see,
24:04see if you can get a good second-hand one, you know?
24:07We'll get it reconditioned, M.O.T.,
24:09but, I mean,
24:10you can't start paying out top prices,
24:13not her age.
24:14Oh, we're gonna get it on the National Elf.
24:16What, free?
24:17Oh, yeah.
24:18Oh, we'll bang it into her, then.
24:20Get a few more years out of her, eh?
24:22Yeah, yeah, yeah.
24:23I mean, she still gets around the house,
24:24you know,
24:25cooking, scrubbing, a bit of that.
24:26Oh, yeah, yeah,
24:27she's all right, Elf, you know,
24:28but she's slow Elf.
24:30Slow.
24:31Very, very slow.
24:32Well,
24:33bun the pace might win a speeder up a bit,
24:35won't it?
24:36Yeah, yeah,
24:37I'll do that.
24:38Here.
24:39What about Bill there?
24:40He won't be going up to heaven all in one piece.
24:43What is that?
24:44Well,
24:45he's a leg short down here,
24:48so he'll be a leg short up there.
24:51No, no, no, no, no.
24:53Eh, that'll be up there waiting for him.
24:55Oh, that'll be kept in storage for him.
24:58Oh, yes, you see,
25:00if you're a good man down here,
25:02with a reserved place up there,
25:05anything that arrives in heaven before you
25:08is labelled and stored
25:10to be collected on arrival.
25:12He won't go through eternity on a stump.
25:16No, no, no, no, no.
25:19No, when he arrives at the pearly gates,
25:22he'll have all his particulars.
25:24Where he comes from,
25:25what address,
25:26what house,
25:28what street,
25:29what town,
25:30who his family are,
25:31and where they're living up there in eternity,
25:33etc., etc.,
25:35directions on how to find him, aye,
25:37travel news on how to get there,
25:39and train times and travel vouchers,
25:41if necessary.
25:43Aye, yes.
25:44Aye,
25:45and a ticket
25:46to collect his own leg.
25:48Brand new and reconditioned
25:50and in perfect working order.
25:52Oh,
25:53you'll be back on your own two feet then.
25:56Yeah, yeah, Phil,
25:57as you get on with that wooden leg of yours,
25:59I mean,
26:00do you get your old rent-a-kill on a national elf?
26:02LAUGHTER
26:06It's chin elf.
26:08It's alloy, not wood.
26:10I wished it was wood.
26:12Last winter,
26:15with all that cold
26:17and fueler short as it was,
26:19I wished it was wood.
26:21It'd been on the fire many a night if it was wood.
26:24You wouldn't.
26:25I would.
26:26You wouldn't.
26:27Aye.
26:28No,
26:29no,
26:30no,
26:31no,
26:32no,
26:33no,
26:34no,
26:35no,
26:36no.
26:37not near neighbours.
26:38Don't want to charge near neighbours.
26:40That only creates bad feelings, eh?
26:42No,
26:43it doesn't create bad feelings.
26:44Charge a stranger.
26:45Charge all your parking strangers.
26:47Charge...
26:48That's as strange as I know I've got the phone.
26:51That's what I'm saying.
26:52Have a first sign in the window.
26:54You made telephones from here.
26:56That's what I'm saying.
26:57I'll run it for you.
26:58Hold on,
26:59I've got to have a gym.
27:00Hey, hey, hey.
27:01Oh!
27:02Oh!
27:03Oh!
27:04Oh!
27:05Oh!
27:06Hey!
27:07Hey!
27:08Hey!
27:09Hey!
27:10Hey!
27:11Hey!
27:12Hey!
27:13Hey!
27:14Hey!
27:15Hey!
27:16Hey!
27:17Hey!
27:18Hey!
27:19Hey!
27:20Hey!
27:21Hey!
27:22Hey!
27:23Hey!
27:24Hey!
27:25Hey!
27:26Hey!
27:27Hey!
27:28Hey!
27:29Hey!
27:30Hey!
27:31Hey!
27:32Hey!
27:33Hey!
27:34Hey!
27:35Hey!
27:36Hey!
27:37Hey!
27:38Hey!
27:39Hey!
27:40Hey!
27:41Hey!
27:42Hey!
27:43Hey!
27:44Hey!
27:45Hey!
27:46Hey!
27:47Hey!
27:48Hey!
27:49Hey!
27:50Hey!
27:51Hey!
27:52Hey!
27:53Well, here you are, up there in the forest.
28:02Shut up. I've got to get to sleep.
28:07Horatia, I can't. Horatia!
28:11Wait my kids up.
28:13All right, what's the matter with you?
28:15Just take your mummy out for a drink, all right?
28:18She's in time to enjoy herself, just because she's in a wheelchair.
28:21Let me say she can't enjoy herself.
28:24I can't pay the bills. Shut up.
28:51Everybody wants to carry on to her.
28:53She's out.
28:54We can't do everything.
28:56That's what I'm gonna do with that food.
28:58Now, I'm sorry.
29:00We can't do everything we can do with that.
29:02We can't do everything.
29:03We can't do everything.
29:07We can't do everything.
29:09I'll pass it off.
Recommended
31:02
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