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  • 4/28/2025

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Fun
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00:00Good evening, everybody, and welcome to Whose Line Is It Anyway?
00:04On tonight's show, Yamadaba Wayne Broidy!
00:08I Taught I Taught Chip Astin!
00:10That's despicable!
00:12Colin Mochrie!
00:13And, blow me down, Ryan Stiles!
00:17And I'm your host, Drew Carey, come on down and have some fun!
00:24Hello!
00:28Thank you!
00:30Welcome to Whose Line Is It Anyway?
00:34The show where everything's made up and the points don't matter.
00:36That's right, the points are as worthless as the phrase, campaign finance reform.
00:43Doesn't matter, if you've never saw this show before, what happens is, uh,
00:45these guys are going to make up everything you see right here in front of you, right off the top of their heads.
00:48Then, after every game, I give them a lot of these fakey points.
00:51Just to keep the show going, at the end of the show, we pick a fake winner.
00:54Winner gets to sit at my desk. Winner gets to sit at my desk and do nothing.
00:56And, uh, the loser has to teach George W. Bush to say subliminal.
01:01Let's go on, uh, let's go on with the game called, yeah.
01:07Speaking of guys who can't talk, let's start the show with a game called Superheroes.
01:16This is for all four of you. You're going to act out as soon as an unlikely superhero.
01:22Colin's going to start.
01:23So he's going to, uh, we're going to think of a name for him,
01:25then they're going to name each other as they come in, try to screw each other up.
01:28Uh, what do we need is an unlikely superhero name for Colin.
01:34Staple Gun Kid.
01:37The Staple Gun Kid.
01:39And what's the big emergency for the Staple Gun Kid?
01:41No paper, okay.
01:45Uh, so there's no paper, Staple Gun Kid.
01:47What are you going to do?
01:53Whoa!
01:54Holy sharp things!
01:57There seems to be a crisis in the world.
01:59There's no paper!
02:00Oh!
02:02It doesn't seem that bad, but no, it could be horrible.
02:05What will I staple together when I write my script for Geppetto 2?
02:11I hope my super friends get here soon.
02:19Thank you. Sorry I'm late.
02:23Thank God you're here, malfunctioning robot with an attitude boy.
02:28I couldn't get in your door.
02:30What is wrong with your door?
02:33Look, there's no paper in the world.
02:34Is that my problem?
02:37What are you looking at?
02:38I'm sorry, you seem to be malfunctioning.
02:40I got here just in time.
02:46Thank God, the Richard Simmons Kid.
02:52Because you people are fat!
02:56You're fat!
02:58Come on!
02:59Work the arms!
03:00Work the arms!
03:01You work your arms!
03:02Work the arms!
03:02I don't need this!
03:03If I could form a finger, I'd give you one.
03:06I will deal you a meal so quickly your head will spin!
03:11Sorry, I'm late.
03:12Oh, thank God!
03:13It's the South Park Kid!
03:14Hey!
03:16Hey!
03:16What the hell you calling me for?
03:22Oh, my God!
03:23You killed Kenny!
03:25He ate too much and you are really fat.
03:27Hey!
03:27Shut up!
03:28I'm not fat!
03:29I'm big bald anyway!
03:32Take that, clear the paper!
03:33I know what you do!
03:36Why don't you go down to the store and get some paper yourself, big bald!
03:39Blame Canada!
03:41Blame Canada!
03:42Cosmo!
03:54Well, thanks for your help.
03:56Cosmo points, it's everybody but Colin for that one.
04:24Colin, I'll give you your points.
04:26Oh!
04:26I'm going to give him his points after the show.
04:28I'm going to sing them to you.
04:30I love you.
04:32What?
04:32I can't hear you.
04:33Your shirt's too loud.
04:38What happened to us?
04:38Now, let's go on to a game.
04:39Sorry, I can't hear you.
04:40What?
04:40I can't hear you.
04:41Now, let's go on to a game called Dweck.
04:43This is for Chip and Wayne with Laura Hall, Linda Taylor, and Cece Roy.
04:48Can you come over here?
04:51Follow me and I'll pick you.
04:53What's your name?
04:54Lena.
04:55Lena, what do you do for a living?
04:56I'm a camp counselor.
04:57Camp counselor?
04:58Come on, I'm Lena.
04:59Lena's a camp counselor.
05:02Have a seat.
05:06I was a camp counselor.
05:07Really?
05:07Yeah, I was Camp Winoa in Akron, Ohio.
05:10When I was in college, the soapbox derby champ stayed there every year.
05:12It was really exciting.
05:14And a lot of money in that.
05:15Oh, yeah.
05:16Yeah.
05:18Man, you make tons of money being a camp counselor.
05:20So, Lena's a camp counselor, and you're going to sing a song to her in the style of the Munchkins.
05:26So, um, whenever you're ready, take it away.
05:38Come from across the scene.
05:40The camp to help me.
05:45She knows just what she's doing when she teaches us canoeing.
05:50She's a counselor.
05:53Welcome.
05:57We are.
06:01We are the kids at the camp.
06:04You teach us how to climb a rope.
06:06You give us lots of skills, and you give us hope.
06:12Ha, ha, ha.
06:13We think that it's fun.
06:15We think that we're taller.
06:18When we are with Lena.
06:21At Camp Mini Winnie Wally hollered.
06:25She banquists the evil witch.
06:28By teaching her how to swim.
06:30That's true.
06:31And everybody knows witches cannot swim.
06:38Oh, but you're such a good counselor.
06:41Welcome to the camp.
06:43Welcome to the camp.
06:43Welcome to the camp.
06:44Welcome to the camp.
06:45Welcome to the camp.
06:47Welcome to the camp.
06:50When I got poison ivy from that wicked witch.
06:55She gave me Columbine lotion.
06:57Lotion, so I would no longer eat.
07:01She banquished the evil witch.
07:04And she told me best-time stories and a joke.
07:06And she even mended my leg.
07:10When I broke it when I fell out of the oak.
07:12Oh, Lena.
07:18Lena.
07:27I like that last little tableau at the end.
07:49That was nice.
07:50That was two married guys.
07:51Clinging to that last bit of hope.
07:55Honey, I was acting.
07:57Now, let's go on to a game.
08:00This is a really good game.
08:01Called Good Cop, Bad Cop.
08:03For Wayne, Ryan, and Colin.
08:04Now, one of these in the audience.
08:07Somebody from this section of the audience.
08:09Tell me the last thing that broke down in your house.
08:12Dishwasher.
08:13Dishwasher.
08:13Okay.
08:14Dishwasher.
08:15So, what happened is, Wayne has called Ryan and Colin over to his house to repair the dishwasher.
08:20What they don't know is that Ryan and Colin used to be partners on the police force
08:23who employed the good cop, bad cop method of interrogation.
08:27Ryan was the good cop.
08:29Colin was the bad cop.
08:30That's what Wayne doesn't know.
08:32And whenever you're ready, take it away.
08:34I hope those guys arrive soon.
08:38Oh.
08:39Hey.
08:40Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
08:41Hey, hey, hey.
08:43Hey, hey, hey.
08:44How did this happen?
08:47How did this happen?
08:48Let me handle this.
08:52All right, I'm Inspector Phillips.
08:53I understand your dishwasher broke down.
08:56Yeah.
08:56Well, let me have a look at it, would you?
08:58I had a big party last night.
08:59You know, I've got to ask you one thing.
09:01Come over here, if you will.
09:02Between you and me.
09:03Yeah.
09:04You don't think you might have overloaded it, do you?
09:07Well, I'm not sure.
09:08I mean, it was a big problem.
09:09You're not sure?
09:10You're not sure?
09:10You don't remember?
09:12You don't remember?
09:13Hey, hey, hey.
09:14Hey, hey.
09:14Hey, hey, hey.
09:23Look, I'd like to help you out.
09:26I noticed the place where you put your detergent at your clothes.
09:30It seems to be stuck.
09:31What?
09:32You should have checked.
09:32Well, I didn't mean because my wife's away.
09:35I know.
09:35No.
09:36No, no, no.
09:38No, no, no.
09:39Get back.
09:39Get back.
09:41I'll handle this.
09:44I know, I know, I know, I know.
09:51I just put the plates in it.
09:54I know.
09:55You put the plates in and you put the detergent in.
09:58I normally don't.
09:59My wife does it.
09:59I know.
10:00And you set it for a short wash, didn't you?
10:02Because there's not many plates in there.
10:03Did you set it for a short wash?
10:04I thought, I thought the longer.
10:07I thought your mother said it for a short wash.
10:09No, I just thought the longer that she said it.
10:09No, no, no.
10:10I just didn't know.
10:10No, no, no.
10:11I just didn't know.
10:11I thought your mother said it.
10:12No, no, no, no.
10:13No, no, no.
10:13No, please.
10:14I don't know.
10:14Oh, big pot.
10:16No.
10:16Oh, hey, hey, hey.
10:20Look, when he gets a big pot in his hand, I can't control him.
10:24I didn't mean.
10:24I just can't.
10:25You just fix it.
10:26It's just a dishwasher.
10:27Maybe you can help us fix it.
10:31Okay.
10:32Why don't we get in the machine, get inside and take a look at it?
10:35How are you going to get inside?
10:37How are you going to?
10:38You're asking me questions?
10:39Well, I don't know what to do now.
10:40No.
10:40Okay, hey, look.
10:43Maybe there's a problem from the inside.
10:44No.
10:45No, no.
10:48No.
10:53Yes, look.
10:54Welcome back to Who's Lines at Anyway?
11:07And, boy, you know we've got a sister show coming.
11:09We've got a spin-off of the show.
11:10It's from the Ford Motor Company and Firestone Tires.
11:12It's called Whose Fault is it Anyway?
11:16Let's go on to a game called Sound Effects.
11:18This is for Ryan and Colin.
11:20I'm going to go up to the audience.
11:26What's your name, please?
11:27Kimberly.
11:28Kimberly, what's going on here?
11:29Kimberly, say hi to one of these guys.
11:31Say hello.
11:33Say hello to Clark.
11:35And we walk around with this sound.
11:41What's your name, please?
11:43Ashley.
11:44Come down here, Ashley.
11:45Say hello.
11:47Give it up, Kimberly.
11:47Kimberly.
11:50Stand up over here.
11:53We'll give you a microphone.
11:55And, Ashley, here's your microphone.
11:57Kimberly and Ashley, you're going to really help us out on the scene.
12:01These guys are going to do a scene for us, and you're going to provide the sound effects.
12:05Kimberly's going to provide the sound effects for Colin, and Ashley's going to provide the
12:08sound effects for Ryan.
12:10And the scene is, Ryan is Noah, and Colin is Mrs. Noah, yeah.
12:20Colin knows his role in every scene.
12:22Now, they get the message to build and load the ark just before the big storm hits.
12:27So, take it away, and you guys are going to do the sound effects one.
12:28What was that?
12:35What was that, dear?
12:37Sorry.
12:37Oh.
12:40I'm expecting rain soon.
12:42Why?
12:42What have you heard?
12:46I'm hungry.
12:47Really?
12:48Oh.
12:51Well, go cook up one of those goats first.
12:53There's three over there anyway.
12:54I hate when they make the noise just as you cut their head off.
13:00I know.
13:01I know.
13:02Honey, we're going to have to collect two of every animal and get them on the ark.
13:06I'm about to build before the rain starts.
13:09And we haven't got much time, so I'm going to build a very small ark.
13:12All right.
13:12Do you need some help?
13:13Would you mind?
13:14All right.
13:14Get some lumber for me, would you?
13:16Well, I'll just cut down this tree.
13:17All right.
13:22Don't use the hose.
13:23Use the axe.
13:24Oh, it's not like I've ever done it before.
13:32Maybe you should put the blade on.
13:34Yes.
13:36Crick, crick, crick, crick, crick, crick, crick.
13:38I've got a crick.
13:43Oh, you got it.
13:45All right.
13:46Now, go assemble all the animals.
13:47I want all of them.
13:48All right.
13:52Oh, okay.
13:53Hey, hey, hey.
13:54Why are those two?
13:55You know what?
13:55They're bossy, the cows.
13:57They just keep budding in line.
13:59Was that thunder?
14:00Boom.
14:01No.
14:03No, I think it was the band next door practicing.
14:05I thought I felt a drop of rain.
14:13Good.
14:13You got the mice.
14:14Get them aboard.
14:17Oh, here comes some hippos.
14:22We better get some throat lozenges.
14:23I don't have time for the arches.
14:25Put them on the log.
14:26We'll get them all on the log.
14:28And we'll float away.
14:29Won't we need a bigger log?
14:32Who's Noah and who's Noah's wife?
14:38I'm sorry.
14:39I didn't mean that.
14:40Give us a kiss.
14:40I've been practicing my ventriloquism so I can talk while we're kissing.
14:54That's right.
14:55All right.
14:57All the animals seem to be aboard.
14:59Except the unicorn.
15:02Don't find two unicorns.
15:07Look.
15:07Look at the sheep with the cone attached to his head.
15:10He's trying to fool us.
15:11Good enough.
15:12Get it on.
15:15Oh, that's thunder.
15:17Boom.
15:19That time they're lost.
15:20They're lost.
15:22We've got them all, I think.
15:23We've got them all.
15:24We better hurry.
15:25The wind's picking up.
15:28I hope that's the wind.
15:30Quick, onto the log.
15:33Don't sit on any of the animals.
15:35Meow.
15:40It can't sit anywhere without...
15:41Noah, what are you...
15:42Oh, my God.
15:43It's floating off by itself.
15:45We have no way of getting away now.
15:47Look, that.
15:52What is that?
15:53No, I meant the thing beside it.
15:54Oh.
15:55This is never going to work.
15:58I guess we're going to die.
16:00Well, that seems awfully harsh.
16:03I guess it's the way the Lord intended it.
16:06Right, my Lord?
16:07Yeah.
16:07Yeah.
16:07I especially enjoyed the voice of God.
16:36So let's move on to a game called, I'm just warming you up, because now you have to do
16:42the Irish drinking song.
16:46I've got a little haul on the piano.
16:50Guess how could I miss you with that top you're wearing.
16:53Sparkle, sparkle, sparkle, sparkle, sparkle.
16:56Liberace's sister.
17:01What?
17:02I'm sorry, are the Liberace's here tonight?
17:06Geez, oh man, I don't even know him.
17:08Quiet down.
17:10What I need from this section over here is something or somebody you really love to be.
17:15Survivor!
17:16Drew Carey.
17:17God.
17:19Drew Carey, all right.
17:25Remembering who signs the checks around here, let's hear the Irish drinking song about Drew Carey.
17:30Oh, if I were Drew, I'm handsome as a god.
17:41I would be so happy, my face looks like a cod.
17:44All the women love me, and all the guys do too.
17:49Everybody loves me.
17:52I think I'll go and get a show.
17:58I'm very successful, you know.
17:59I'll take my glasses off right now.
18:01And look at me, I glow.
18:03I'll get some laser surgery.
18:05I'll make everyone laugh.
18:07I'll run around with my clothes off.
18:08Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
18:10Oh, I-di-di-di-di-di-di-di-di-di-di-di-di-di.
18:14I'm generous to a fault.
18:16Give my money away.
18:18I throw it by the bucket full.
18:20Hey, there's some right today.
18:22Here, all my friends.
18:24Come live in my house.
18:25Hey, come on now, you.
18:27We're all hung like a mouse.
18:29Oh, I-di-di-di-di-di-di-di-di-di-di.
18:31I'll put them all a raise now.
18:35And then I'll hug them.
18:36And then I'll say, you're lovely.
18:38I'll never, never buck them.
18:40I'll give them all my cars.
18:42I'll let them sleep in my beds.
18:44Because I'm the greatest boss there is.
18:46I'll rub Colin's head.
18:48Oh, I-di-di-di-di-di-di-di-di-di-di-di.
18:51Oh, I-di-di-di-di-di-di-di-di-di-di-di.
18:55I-di-di-di-di-di.
19:02I was great.
19:03We'll be right back with more Who's Line.
19:05Don't go away.
19:10Welcome back to Who's Line is it anyway?
19:11Tonight's winner, Colin Mockery.
19:13Colin Mockery.
19:16I don't know how it happened either.
19:17There's some kind of mixed up.
19:18So, the rest of these, let's relax.
19:21The rest of us are going to do props for you.
19:22Can we have our props?
19:24For you and Ryan?
19:25Seriously?
19:25Yeah.
19:26This is for me and Ryan?
19:27That's for you guys.
19:30I have a hundred ideas for both of them.
19:32But, oh well.
19:32What we have to do is we have to go back and forth
19:37and think of as many ideas as we can
19:38with using these props.
19:39Starting with Rain and Chip.
19:48If we were thinner, we'd be dry.
19:52Rose!
19:53Rose!
19:54My heart will go on!
19:58Today's show brought to you by the number eight.
20:09And there's your cotton candy.
20:13I wonder what it's like up there on the land.
20:16You must tell the English to leave now.
20:23While I make the butter.
20:34What's up, Duff?
20:39Oui.
20:39I am from France.
20:43I hope you like this ring.
20:45It's one carat.
20:50Oh!
20:50Welcome back to Who's Got It Anyway?
20:57Tonight.
20:58Colin and Chip are going to read the credits for you.
21:01And Colin and Chip, I want you to read the credits
21:02as two chorus line girls in rehearsal about their jobs.
21:06Thanks for watching, everybody, tonight.
21:08My dogs are barking.
21:10I'm telling you, that Dan Patterson is after our job.
21:12I know.
21:13And if Jimmy Melville will not keep his hands...
21:14Oh my God, Bruce Gowers.
21:16Oh, I've got a track.
21:21All right, Bruce, I've got a track.
21:22But Tim Kenningsworth says that I don't have to do it.
21:25Oh my God.
21:26Oh, dear.
21:29Oh, no, she's down, she's down.
21:31Get Michelle Pershing, she knows what to do.
21:34Mr. Ziegfeld's in the audience tonight.
21:36Let's go, girls.

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