Sperm City Curbside Service

Beasley Digital

Dave & Chuck the Freak talk about a sperm bank in California that is now offering curbside service and wonder what it would be like if Buffalo Bill dropped off a sample.

Transcript

00:00you don't see something like this too often sperm bank curbside service

00:10everything's curbside nowadays that's pretty gross

00:12california man saw something interesting while driving and decided to share his curiosity with

00:18the world he saw a local sperm bank calling itself sperm city jeez great name that is a

00:25great and it is now as you can see they're now offering curbside service look at the

00:28how they dot their eye unbelievable bitch they do they dot their eye with a sperm yeah

00:34sperm city is not a city i want to go to no i'm thinking that song rack city sperm

00:40now logic says donors would shoot their goods into a cup and drop it off curbside to helpful

00:49staff but those who responded to his tweet saw it differently one guy said takes a hell of a shot

00:53to make it to the curb for drop off or pick up oh yeah uh someone said sperm city's hired hands

00:58stay busy satisfying curbside clientele and someone else said as long as the donor is wearing a mask

01:04what could possibly be questionable about curbside sperm donation yeah imagine like when buffalo bill

01:11comes up with his all right i was wondering if i could give you guys some stuff

01:14hi back again oh no more stuff mr bill i can't you know what let me just go run around the corner

01:26those aren't properly sealed and i'll whip up another batch for you oh we would prefer you not

01:32already did oh god oh geez you're not wearing a mask no gloves you're not big on germs buffalo

01:41no the poor collector oh yeah poor collector what do you do i work at sperm city bad enough you

01:50work at sperm city on a regular basis i brought you my sperm oh god damn it i'm going to lunch

01:55take it from me you're always bringing it we don't need that much nobody's looking to make babies from

02:04you 10 years later you

02:0610 years later though you find out that like buffalo bill has has like 150 kids

02:13i'm a dad somehow i'm actually attractive to women

02:17in a photo form kids kids kids and pets

02:21i mean a hell of a thing like buffalo bill has actually got great facial structure right somehow

02:28and in a photo it's like yeah that that guy i'm not a great big fat person

02:32yeah exactly i'm reaching that's scary to think that now you're raising a generation of bills

02:38oh that is i never want like well it's like like true like people with that are like murderous and

02:45they have some kind of gene in them and then they somehow are hot no like you don't know like a

02:49bunch of ted bundy kids you don't know nope you just don't know it's part of that's that's part of

02:55their you know devious plan is to procreate and raise a bunch of little oh so like they go in and

03:02they're like yeah i went to harvard right uh you know they're supposed to do big background checks

03:08and everything yeah you hope so right then there was like wasn't that one it was like a doctor was

03:13like inseminating people with his own yes yeah so he had like a million kids yeah but there was another

03:19thing where a guy had like 50 or 60 kids and he was like fine with it and they all meet him and

03:26yeah that guy was like an actual donor that people wanted yeah but like this doctor was just like

03:30like sliding his sliding his in there yeah imagine times are tough and lisa's got to take a job at

03:37sperm city oh my god like how do you even tell your family i would never work at sperm city

03:42she got a job at a medical clinic dave is that what you say that's what i would say you can't

03:49tell anyone you work at sperm city no hey listen i'm gonna drop some lunch off to you where's your

03:54uh location you know what no i'm okay today i'm not that hungry i'm all right i'll meet you there

03:59yeah yeah yeah you don't want to see him like eating like subs and stuff around the office no like

04:05egg salad or oh imagine a lot of people be fine with saying they work there though right oh yeah sure

04:11i'm a manager at sperm city well it's available if you're looking to donate sperm and now curbside

04:26service at least at sperm city maybe other sperm banks offer the same yeah conveniences who knows

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