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Short filmTranscript
00:00For more information, visit www.fema.org
00:30speak are you awake come on speak speak up come on boy talk to me like you did in the wilds of
00:41mexico oh i can see it in your red-rimmed eyes speak you're a righteous firebrand speak
00:52we need a furry moist avenger like you on the team come on man let's bark up the right
00:59tree together tick you know he's never gonna come out if you just sit there traumatizing him day
01:07after day he needs time to adjust to his new environment but arthur we need him on the team
01:13a stalwart hound to bring up the rear and bark out the clarion call of justice this is becoming one
01:20of those tick things again isn't it excuse me you know one of those tick things yeah where you get
01:28all excited about something and suddenly it's all you can think about and the next thing you know
01:33you're way out of touch with reality yeah arthur what are you saying you've already done it yeah
01:40you've constructed one of your elaborate fantasy worlds around that poor animal how do you know
01:45you can't just peer into a person's mind and know their secret dreams no well let me just try okay
01:52uh all right it starts with something ridiculous like um oh i don't know the united nations
01:59bullseye uh-huh and speak the uberhunt is addressing the assembled delegates hammering out a peace treaty
02:07between warring nations
02:08uh uncanny
02:11to limon some les amis
02:14here speak come on boy
02:16oh i beg your pardon ladies and gentlemen but i have to go
02:20the tick needs me
02:22what a dog
02:24help help
02:29good boy speak i love you right on
02:38help help save me monster monster bad monster
02:43looks like arthur's got himself into trouble again
02:47you know it come on let's go
02:51oh no it's the chick and his incredible dog speak
02:58well you're just like little jack horner you've stuck your thumb into the christmas pie of my brain
03:07and pulled out the plum of my innermost dreams
03:10how do you do it
03:13well you're not exactly a closed book tick
03:16i mean you've been haranguing speak about it all week
03:19i've loosed my lips and sunk the ship of my own privacy
03:23that began the reign of barren violence
03:38marry marlin
03:39marry marlin
03:45whoa that's tampering with u.s mail
03:48a federal offense
03:50okay gang
03:51let's make a difference
03:54mister the civic-minded five will put an end to your shenanigans
03:59oh a fight
04:03come on
04:05try me
04:06carpeted men
04:08by rubbing my carpeted feet over any surface
04:12i can create a powerful charge of static electric
04:15i'll give you some static
04:18you deep pile rock rat
04:20static
04:21cling
04:22too strong
04:23can't move
04:23move
04:24let's get sticky
04:26he's got captain mucilage
04:29hmm looks bad for the five
04:35hatch
04:37hatch
04:42welcome to week two of the doctor food food foam diet
04:47it's time to drink down your first delicious diet shake of the day
04:50100% synthetic with absolutely no nutritional value
04:57okay speak
05:02to fetch you've got to
05:04you've got to move
05:05huh
05:06what's that boy
05:07oh of course
05:10silly me
05:11you've got to get the scent of the prey before the hunt begins
05:14all righty
05:16here you go
05:17mmm
05:20fresh ball
05:22speak
05:23the ball fears you
05:24listen to its cry
05:26smell
05:28its fear
05:29no
05:31bitch
05:33yes after a week of nothing but doctor food's food foam
05:36your body has begun dining on itself
05:39eating away that unsightly fat
05:41leaving a trim new you
05:43hello
05:46hello tick
05:48four-legged man here
05:49we're downtown battling a maniac
05:50and um
05:51the maniac's ahead by three
05:53oops
05:55make that four
05:56could you lend us a hand
05:58roger
05:58we'll be right down
06:00great
06:00great
06:01gotta go
06:02arthur
06:05speak
06:05into the fray
06:07i'm very disappointed in you
06:09here i am
06:10new to this town
06:11looking for a little violence
06:13and this is the fight that i get
06:15you wilted like lilies
06:17and i'm only on six
06:18enjoy your victory while you can violent
06:21the tick is on his way
06:23and he's stronger than all of us put together
06:25that is correct
06:26he is i've seen him he's big
06:28really
06:28good
06:29then i'll go up to seven
06:32the bigger i am the harder they fall
06:40onward swift speak to the scene of the crime
07:02to your first taste of villain breed
07:05now there's a man who's in touch with his rage
07:15all right mr knock everything over that'll be just about enough of that
07:27says who
07:29says the tick
07:31and his incredible dog
07:33speak
07:34are you guys okay
07:48we're fine lad
07:49arthur get his belt
07:51it's the source of his strength
07:53oh great
07:54now speak
07:59in crime fighting it's crucial to keep your eye on the criminal
08:02they're a tricky vicious lot
08:04case in point
08:07speak
08:15speak
08:16don't mind me
08:28i'm harmless
08:29just just arthur
08:30i'm fluttering around
08:32come on fight like a man
08:35thank you i'd rather not
08:37what
08:40that's mine
08:46give it back
08:47no
08:48speak
08:58speak
08:59speak
09:00speak
09:00oh no
09:05he looks terrible
09:07tick that's the way he always looks
09:10no but but his his eyes are all gooey
09:13and he's moist all over
09:15he's always moist
09:16yeah but look at his fur
09:18he's unraveling like a cheap sweater
09:20i've got to get him to the vet
09:23tick
09:23i've been telling you that for a week
09:25okay tick
09:27you take him to dr sniff
09:28i'll help the civic-minded five
09:30and we'll meet back at home okay
09:32emergency emergency emergency emergency emergency emergency emergency
09:36bad man hit doug with street
09:46i need two thugs
10:01i've got money
10:03we are two thugs
10:05how do i know you're any good
10:07you're good
10:15oh you're good
10:16okay
10:17now here's what i need
10:19oh no
10:33hello
10:52carmelita
10:54hola
10:55what are you doing tonight
10:56tick
11:05about speak
11:06yes
11:07i've got some good news
11:09and some bad news
11:10no
11:11i'll do anything duck
11:13money is no object
11:14does he need my kidneys
11:16no
11:17no
11:17speak's fine
11:18except for a little eczema
11:19some worms in the mange
11:21then what's the bad news
11:22what's wrong with my dog
11:25tick
11:26tick
11:26that's just it
11:27you don't have a dog
11:28i don't
11:30you've got a hydrochorus
11:31hydrochorus
11:33huh
11:34capybara tick
11:35speak is a rodent
11:37whoo
11:39but he's one of the world's largest
11:41all right
11:43go speak
11:45arthur
11:47that diet of yours is amazing
11:49i just can't get over how different you look
11:52yeah
11:52i know
11:53and i gotta tell you carmelita
11:55i feel great
11:56and from now on everything's gonna be different
11:58what are you talking about
12:00hey bunny boy
12:01i think you're wearing something that doesn't belong to you
12:04oh okay
12:05this is great
12:06now you see
12:06this is a perfect example
12:08i'm in a restaurant
12:09minding my own business
12:11right
12:11and a couple of thugs start picking on me
12:13now
12:13what would the old arthur do in a situation like this
12:16oh arthur
12:17i don't think
12:18no no no really seriously
12:19and be honest now
12:21well
12:22i guess he'd
12:23he'd cringe
12:24and
12:24i don't know
12:25scream something like
12:26not in the face
12:27not in the face
12:28exactly
12:29and then i guess they'd beat him up
12:32yeah
12:33right
12:33right
12:34okay
12:34now
12:34here's where the new arthur is different
12:37arthur
12:42look at me
12:46no no no
12:49oh yeah
12:55that's just great
12:56oh that felt so right
13:02so good
13:04arthur what's happening to you
13:06hey you
13:09i know what you're after
13:18and you're not gonna get it
13:21in fact
13:22if i see your face again
13:25i'll rearrange it for you
13:27got it
13:29yes
13:29and get
13:30faster
13:33i love it
13:45tropical parasites
13:56your carefree infestation ends here
13:59tonight
14:00you swim in ointments of righteous hygiene
14:03flee before the might of modern medicine
14:06might slice and chiggers
14:09your days are numbered
14:11yes in this house
14:13cleanliness
14:14is next to
14:16dogliness
14:17oh
14:19speak
14:20speak
14:20i'm sorry i didn't mean it
14:22oh
14:23of course you're not a dog
14:25you're a wonderful lovable rodent
14:28and there's nothing wrong with that
14:30no if that's your lifestyle choice
14:33then we'll stand behind you all the way
14:36tick
14:36i need your help
14:37carmelita guess what
14:39speak's not a dog at all
14:40he's the world's biggest rat
14:42i don't know about that
14:44have you seen arthur lately
14:46hmm
14:49wait
14:53hey
14:54pretentious little french guy
14:56we
14:57uh bring me more of that um
14:59oh
15:00meat
15:01oh hey that looks good
15:02let me try some of that
15:03oh
15:05thank heaven
15:06please
15:07your friend arthur
15:08does not see
15:09himself tonight
15:10really
15:11eat
15:12get
15:14arthur
15:15well
15:16well
15:17if it isn't the tick
15:18arthur
15:19what in the wor
15:20hey
15:21you're wearing that violent guy's belt
15:23you got a problem with that
15:25tick
15:26indeed i do mister
15:28that belt is a fashion accessory of evil
15:30and evil is never in fashion
15:33you're just jealous
15:35come on chum just hand over the belt
15:39arthur
15:40arthur
15:41please
15:42listen to the tick
15:43no
15:44all right then
15:45i'll just
15:46no
15:47no
15:48no
15:49no
15:50no
15:51oh yeah
15:52i see how the system works
15:53well i'll tell you something i am through being your sidekick i'm through being your pudgy comic relief
15:59arthur
16:00arthur
16:01stop it
16:02you know i'm my own comic relief
16:04no
16:05come on man
16:06ah
16:07okay
16:08you
16:09asked for it
16:14whoa
16:15gentlemen please
16:16could you take it outside
16:17sure
16:18sure
16:19i'll take it outside
16:24come on carmelita
16:25let's hit the town
16:27haven't you hit enough stuff tonight
16:30superheros
16:37okay buddy
16:38i'm taking off the kid gloves
16:40and putting on the very mad gloves
16:53come on come on
16:54i don't know what you've done with the real arthur but you're a great big jerk
17:04well you see babe that's the problem with having friends they never let you grow as a person
17:13arthur please your brain is drowning in muscle give me the belt
17:19you want a piece of me
17:20we'll take your best shot
17:22i never thought i'd be saying this to you
17:25but
17:26spoon
17:28spoon this
17:30no
17:39arthur
17:40you've got to make yourself smaller
17:42your ears won't hold you
17:45turn off the belt
17:49i can't reach it
17:51too many muscles
17:52no
17:55no
18:06get off of me
18:08oh arthur it's you
18:12nice catch moth girl
18:15oh
18:22i must thank you for your kindness
18:24most of the heroes when they have their brawls they just leave a mess
18:28happy to do it prim king of waiters
18:30yes
18:31and i have to just say again
18:33i am really really sorry
18:36tick carmelita
18:38tick carmelita
18:40i'm sorry
18:41oh arthur
18:42we're just happy to have the real you back
18:45yes chum but let your journey into hugeness teach us all a lesson
18:49absolute power is a sticky wicket and arthur chum you are the stickiest
18:55don't you get it good friend some of the best things come in small packages but large things can't unless they're inflatable or require some assembly or unless they're hearts
19:08yes
19:09yes giant juicy loving hearts big as the moon but much much warmer right speak
19:21hey gang tammy fig writes dear tick why do trees only grow upwards and what can we do to help save the trees
19:28why trees grow in all kinds of ways tammy up is just the one we notice most their roots grow downwards into rich earth and their branches grow sideways to to mingle
19:39now what can tammy fig do to help save the trees well number one stop writing letters they're made of trees
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