- 7/11/2025
When Joey goes to Hollywood to pursue his dream of being an actor, he meets his nephew Michael and ends up sharing a unique camaraderie with him.
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Short filmTranscript
00:00you're probably wondering why I'm getting a gift basket not really I was nominated for a daytime
00:08soap award again that's great you're right it is weird you know cuz cuz now I'm on prime time but
00:16I'm nominated for my work on days of our lives I'm up for best death scene can I go I wish I
00:24could take you but seating's limited oh it takes it out of you but you got to do it for the vans
00:32oh uh Gina I meant to tell you I get to bring a guest to the award show and I thought it'd be
00:37nice if I took my sister really you don't want to bring a date nah I could bring a nice girl but
00:43I'd rather bring you I know exactly what to wear I got this new outfit the top is just suspenders no
00:50no Gina this is a big night for me I'm up for an award you know maybe you can dress up people
00:55will be in fancy gowns oh I have a very special gown requires 4c batteries I haven't seen it but
01:05maybe that's not the one if you want I can loan you a dress no I have one that my husband always
01:12says would look great on you is that weird okay I'll do it I could still be dirty on the inside
01:22that's the spirit so who's the basket from oh uh
01:28Alex Gina and Michael oh that's three names on a pretty small basket
01:38come on
01:49yeah
01:53you wanna be alright you gotta watch
02:04you wanna be alright you gotta watch
02:06Hey, hey, they just sent me a copy of the clip.
02:20They're going to play at the awards show.
02:21You want to see it?
02:22Sure.
02:23All right.
02:23Let me set the scene up for you.
02:30It's been a while since I've seen it.
02:31Let's just watch.
02:34Four seconds.
02:36Retractor.
02:42Scalpel.
02:47Morgan, why?
02:49Because the man you're operating on is my husband.
02:53I need 20 cc's of...
02:56Betrayal.
02:57Well, that's, uh, I'm not sure what to say.
03:09Then I'll say it.
03:11Wow.
03:13Yeah.
03:15All right.
03:15I'll see you later.
03:16All right.
03:16Where are you going?
03:17I got to get to the gym.
03:18I want to get a workout in before the awards show.
03:20You know, do a little run and maybe some push-ups.
03:21How many push-ups are you going to do?
03:23I don't know.
03:2350.
03:2450?
03:24That's impressive.
03:25Except with or without your skirt on.
03:30Are you trash-talking me?
03:32Me?
03:33No, no, no.
03:3450 is a lot of push-ups.
03:36For someone without a Y chromosome.
03:39Seriously.
03:40It's not clear what you're doing.
03:41I just want to be sure before I hit you.
03:43No.
03:44I'm just saying.
03:45I could do at least 100 push-ups, man.
03:47I'm doing 50 in a row.
03:48Not over the course of my lifetime.
03:49Okay.
03:52All right, big guy.
03:53I didn't want to make you feel bad.
03:54Okay?
03:56But watch this.
03:59One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, 11, 14, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19,
04:1120, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 25.
04:14What the hell are you doing?
04:15Oh, you're jealous, buddy?
04:17It doesn't stop there.
04:18Twenty-seven, twenty-eight, twenty-nine, thirty.
04:20Let me guess. Let me guess.
04:21Your mom showed you how to do a push-up, didn't she?
04:24Yeah, that's right, bitch.
04:28That's not how men do push-ups, okay?
04:30When you do a real push-up, your knees are off the ground
04:33and you're holding yourself up by your hands on your toes.
04:36Okay. That's physically impossible.
04:40It's not that hard. Just try it.
04:42Okay, all right. You know what?
04:43I should be able to do a bunch of these.
04:47Okay. It's very funny, Joey.
04:50Get your foot off my back.
05:00Hey.
05:01Hey.
05:01Oh, you look so nice.
05:03I just wanted to tell you good luck tonight.
05:05Oh.
05:05Um, if you win, are you going to thank me?
05:08Uh, not by name, no, but I am going to thank
05:10a certain special lady to cover all my bases.
05:14And if you want to think that that applies to you,
05:16you go right ahead.
05:19Is that your speech?
05:20No, no. I'm presenting Best Supporting Actress.
05:22I just got the list of nominees
05:23and I'm having trouble with this one name.
05:25How do you say this?
05:26I think it's Mariska Sekretopovich.
05:29I think we have a problem.
05:34Okay.
05:34I'm coming in, but I don't want anyone to laugh at me.
05:36Oh, my God.
05:40Gina.
05:41You look beautiful.
05:43Shut up.
05:45I'm not ridiculous.
05:47No, no.
05:47You look great.
05:48I don't know if I can do this.
05:50She looks so uncomfortable.
05:53Oh, I know that look.
05:54She's wearing underwear.
05:55Okay.
06:00All right, Joey.
06:02I'll admit it.
06:02I did kind of embarrass myself before with the push-ups,
06:05but I do have great upper body strength.
06:08Watch me do a chin-up.
06:10Oh, my God.
06:10Mom, look at you.
06:11No cleavage.
06:14Where are you going to keep your car keys and your flask?
06:18I have to carry a handbag.
06:21Okay, so, Joey, how many chin-ups can you do?
06:27I don't know.
06:27Ten, 20.
06:28Is that the number of boobs you have because you're a girl?
06:33Is that supposed to be trash talk?
06:36It makes me sad.
06:39Because there's something I'd like to show you.
06:41You see, I happen to be very good at doing chin-ups,
06:43so prepare to be impressed.
06:46Mom, do my legs.
06:51Oh, yeah.
06:55Oh, yeah.
06:56Oh, yes!
06:57I'm feeling strong today.
06:59What's the matter, Joey?
07:00Too shocked to count out loud.
07:02What's that?
07:03Oh, good job, hon.
07:04It's all you, Michael.
07:06Oh, yeah.
07:14All right, Mr. Tribbiani.
07:15I'll come get you when it's time to present.
07:18Please allow me, ma'am.
07:20Ma'am?
07:21Oh, thank you, Your Honor.
07:25Oh, it's weird to be back with this crowd.
07:28You know, I know a lot of these people from days of our lives.
07:31Hey, Paul, how's the soap world treating you?
07:33Soap world, huh?
07:34Guess you think you're a big man now because you moved on to prime time?
07:38Guess you think you're better than me?
07:40Well, I hadn't really thought about it, but, yeah, I do a little bit.
07:44Good seeing you, buddy.
07:45Oh, hot girl.
07:50Two o'clock.
07:50Oh, no, no, no.
07:51That's one of the women in the category I'm presenting.
07:53I cannot get her name right.
07:55How do you say this?
07:58Nomine...
07:58Nominees.
07:59That's not what I was asking, and it took you way too long.
08:05Hey, you're Joey Tribbiani, right?
08:07I'm Arishka.
08:08Oh, nice to meet you.
08:09Yeah, this is my sister, Gina.
08:11Hey, nice dress.
08:12Oh, yeah?
08:13Nice face.
08:14Yeah, Gina.
08:14She was complimenting you.
08:18Oh, I'm sorry.
08:19Um, thank you, dear.
08:21If you'll excuse me, I'm going to go get a drink.
08:30Say, that last name of yours is pretty tough.
08:33How do you pronounce it?
08:35Sekretopovich.
08:36It's simple.
08:37It starts with a soft C, and then the C-H is pronounced like a hard K, and then the accent's
08:40on Po.
08:41The fourth syllable?
08:42Oh, get a crotch-a-pole.
08:51Okay, Mr. Tribbiani, you're on in ten seconds.
08:54Okay, wait, real quick.
08:55How do you say this name?
08:57Oh, here's a way to remember.
08:58The first name's Mariska, like Mariska Hargitay, and the second Sekretopovich, like Magdalena Sekretopovich,
09:03the Chechenian tennis player.
09:05What?
09:07You're on.
09:07Now presenting for Best Supporting Actress in a Daytime Drama, and nomineing himself
09:12tonight, Joey Tribbiani.
09:15When I played Dr. Drake Remore, I had a lot of patience.
09:19These nominees tonight also have a lot of patience in waiting for their award.
09:27That's solid.
09:28And now the nominees, from Passions, Kimberly Evans, from One Life to Live, Sherry Teasdale,
09:38and from General Hospital, Mariska Sekretopovich.
09:45Yes, Mariska Sekretopovich.
09:47Oh, my God.
09:49Oh, no, no, no, no.
09:52Well, maybe, yeah.
09:54No, no, no, no.
09:54No, no, no.
09:56Oh, my gosh, I don't know who to thank.
09:59I mean, I didn't prepare a speech.
10:00I was such a long shot.
10:02Can I talk to you for a second?
10:06Grandma, I know you're up there watching, and you said I could do it, and you were right.
10:11Oh.
10:14This means so much to me, mostly because I was nominated with two brilliant actresses
10:19who deserve this so much more than I do.
10:21Especially Kimberly Evans of Passion.
10:34I'm so excited.
10:35I mean, I can't believe I won.
10:37This is amazing.
10:38Although, you did slightly mispronounce my name.
10:41Well, must have been close.
10:42You ran up there pretty damn quick.
10:45Congrats, Mariska.
10:46Joey, can I talk to you for a second?
10:50What happened out there?
10:51You said the wrong name.
10:53Oh, no, I didn't.
10:54Just you did.
10:56I know the names of all the winners.
10:57Really?
10:58Come on.
10:59Is the J-man bringing home the hardware?
11:01This is a serious problem.
11:04Look, I know.
11:05I'm sorry.
11:05But can't we just announce that I made a mistake and give the real winner the award?
11:08Are you crazy?
11:10That would call into question the credibility of this show.
11:12Every award would be suspect.
11:14Sexiest couple.
11:15Best smile.
11:17Favorite ghost.
11:18Least favorite ghost.
11:20I feel so bad for Kimberly Evans.
11:23Look!
11:24I know people.
11:25And if you say anything, I'll have you banned from every award show.
11:29On TBS.
11:30Ladies and gentlemen, we'll be returning from commercial break in two minutes.
11:40Hey, Kimberly Evans.
11:42Hi, I'm Joey Tribbiani.
11:44I'm sorry you didn't win before.
11:46Are you okay?
11:47I've been better.
11:48Oh.
11:49Well, it's probably not about the award.
11:51Maybe you have a disease.
11:53I never should have gotten my hopes up, but it makes sense that Mariska won.
12:00After all, I only studied at Juilliard, and she was the loose one on real-world Seattle.
12:07Uh, hey, look at it this way.
12:09There's always next year, huh?
12:11I don't think so.
12:12My character died.
12:14Of natural causes.
12:16That felt good.
12:17Well, I mean, you probably have lots of other opportunities.
12:21Oh, sure.
12:22I'm a 51-year-old actress in Hollywood.
12:24The doors are flying wide open for me.
12:27My agent submitted me for a lifeguard on an Ashton Kutcher movie, and I've got a really
12:32good feeling.
12:36Kimberly, I'm so sorry you didn't win.
12:39Oh, please.
12:40I guess I'm just not good enough.
12:43Oh, no, you are good.
12:44You don't need some trophy to tell you that.
12:47It's not about the trophy.
12:48It's what it represents.
12:51What do you mean?
12:52It would have been an opportunity for me to stand in front of my peers and finally be
12:57recognized for 25 years of hard work and sacrifice.
13:02That's why I'm upset.
13:07Would it, uh...
13:11Would it help if we made out?
13:18No.
13:18Fair enough.
13:27Wow.
13:28That is a beautiful gown.
13:30You like my dress.
13:31What's not to like?
13:33Grindstone, spandex, that chain that starts there, ends there.
13:36Awesome.
13:38Can I just say something?
13:39I don't get chicks like you.
13:41I mean, you've got this great body.
13:42Why do you want to hide it?
13:44I dressed like this because my brother wanted me to.
13:46Who's he?
13:47Joey Tribbiani.
13:48The actor?
13:49Oh, I would so do him.
13:51Oh, thank you.
13:55They were my manners.
13:56I'm sure I'd do you a brother, too.
14:01Um, just so you know, if Joey wins his award tonight, he's gonna thank a certain special
14:06lady.
14:07That's me.
14:07I just did one.
14:14No, you didn't.
14:16I can't do it.
14:17I can't do it.
14:18I'm not a man.
14:20Don't feel bad.
14:22These things are impossible.
14:24I don't know how anyone ever...
14:26Oh, wow, look at that.
14:29Hey, I'm pretty good at this.
14:33I mean, oh, it's so hard.
14:35This is so humiliating.
14:39Why can't I just do it?
14:40The only reason I can do it is because I weigh less.
14:43You're a man.
14:45You're big and strong.
14:47Are those your bones?
14:48You feel elderly.
14:53Hey, you are.
14:53The producer was looking for you.
14:54They didn't announce your award in, like, 15 minutes.
14:57I can't think about that right now.
14:58I feel too guilty.
14:59Wah, wah, wah, wah, wah.
15:02Well, you can change the outfit, but you're still the same old pain in the ass.
15:05I just wish it was something I could do to fix this.
15:11Well, maybe you could convince Mariska to give up her award.
15:15How am I going to do that?
15:16Come on.
15:17You're good with women.
15:18Use your charm.
15:20Oh, yeah, you're right.
15:22Maybe I'll win it over with some witty conversation.
15:25What?
15:25Nah, I'm just kidding.
15:26I'm going to hit her with my sex ray.
15:31Hey, there's my good luck charm.
15:33Hey, Mariska, can I talk to you for a second?
15:35Whoa, Chief.
15:36I'm in the middle of the conversation here.
15:39Or do you think I should just walk away because you're on a big-time show?
15:42That'd be great.
15:43Thanks, buddy.
15:50Uh, look.
15:52I don't know about you, but when we were up on that stage together, I felt a real connection.
15:59Now, we could play a lot of games, but I'm not about that.
16:03So let me just put this out there.
16:06We owe it to ourselves as two beautiful people to seize this moment.
16:12So let me ask you.
16:14You want to do something wild?
16:15Something crazy?
16:17Something you'll never forget?
16:19Yes.
16:20Yes, I do.
16:23Give your award to Kimberly Evans.
16:28What?
16:29That would be so hot.
16:33What are you talking about?
16:35Okay.
16:36Look, I said the wrong name up there before.
16:39You didn't really win.
16:40Oh, my God.
16:41I didn't win?
16:42No.
16:44So...
16:44Not so fast.
16:46Everyone thinks I won this award, and that's not going to change.
16:49What do you mean?
16:50If you tell anyone what happened, I'm going to tell them you said my name on purpose because
16:54you want to sleep with me.
16:55That's blackmail.
16:56That's right.
16:57You don't work on a soap opera without picking up a few things.
17:00Well, I've picked up a few things, too.
17:03If you don't give that back, I'm not going to operate on your husband.
17:05What?
17:08I got nothing.
17:13I am going to get a drink.
17:15Do you like tequila?
17:16Do I?
17:17You are like a sister.
17:18When I first saw you, I had no idea you were going to be this much fun.
17:24Well, it's funny the way people judge.
17:26Tonight, I dress like this for once, and people think I'm all fancy.
17:29But if I dress the way I normally do, people would think we were prostitutes.
17:34The lesson is, don't judge people by the way they dress.
17:37Actually, I am a prostitute.
17:40Oh.
17:41And the lesson is, maybe I should dress different.
17:44Hey, how you doing, honey?
17:50I'm okay.
17:51It's been kind of a rough night, you know?
17:53Said the wrong name up there.
17:56Sex rays on the fritz.
17:59Ladies and gentlemen, please take your seats.
18:01We're back from commercial in 30 seconds.
18:04I just wanted to thank you for being so nice to me earlier.
18:07But I have to get home now so I can catch my 16-year-old smoking weed in the basement.
18:11Hey, hey, uh, please sit.
18:15Ladies and gentlemen, from General Hospital, Jack Wilson.
18:19Nominees for Best Death Scene are...
18:23From One Life to Live, Gerard St. Clair.
18:27From Passions, Mitch O'Leary.
18:31And from Days of Our Lives, Joey Tribbiani.
18:36Good luck. I hope you win.
18:38Oh, I told you before, it doesn't matter what they think.
18:42And the winner is...
18:43Joey Tribbiani.
18:44Oh!
18:45Wow!
18:47Yes!
18:48Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
18:49Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
18:51Oh, my God, I can't believe I won this!
18:57And again, some big competition.
19:00Gerard, eaten by wolves.
19:02Bravo!
19:03And Mitch, you were smothered by a pillow, but great leg acting.
19:10And also, there's a certain special someone out there I would like to thank.
19:16You know who you are.
19:22It's just so amazing to be up here finally getting recognized for my work.
19:26It really, really does feel good.
19:33But, you know, there's someone here who really deserved an award tonight and didn't get one.
19:44So, I'd like to give this trophy to Kimberly Evans.
19:49Kimberly, come on up here.
19:51What?
19:51Let's clap her up here, everybody.
19:56Come on.
19:58That's more applause than I got.
20:02This is in recognition of a career full of wonderful performances.
20:09You are truly loved.
20:10This belongs to you.
20:11I don't know what to say to be standing up here in front of all you beautiful people.
20:21So many friends.
20:22So many memories.
20:24It's just wonderful.
20:27And what a generous gesture from Joey Tribbiani.
20:31No, no, no, no, no.
20:32This isn't about me.
20:34This is about you.
20:36Come on, everybody.
20:37You know her.
20:39You love her.
20:40Let's give it up one more time for Mariska Sekretukovic.
20:47Hey.
20:58Hey, Josephine.
21:01What?
21:02Okay, so I may not have been able to do a chin-up or a push-up,
21:06but I just beat Alex at arm wrestling.
21:09Unimpressive, and yet I doubt it.
21:13Okay, I'll prove it to you.
21:15Let's go.
21:17Fine.
21:19All right, you ready?
21:20Mm-hmm.
21:21One, two, three, go.
21:27Oh, yeah.
21:28Nice playing with you, ma'am.
21:33Right down.
21:33It's over.
21:34It's over.
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