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The Dick Emery Show S17E07 The Best of Dick Emery
Category
🦄
CreativityTranscript
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00:56Good morning, sir. Good morning, sir. Good morning, Miss Williams.
01:26Good morning, Miss Williams.
01:55Oh, my God.
02:25Oh, my God.
02:55Oh, my God.
03:13Good morning, Mr. Schrodinger.
03:37Good morning, sir. Good morning.
03:43LAUGHTER
04:06Blimey! Who was that? Him?
04:08Oh, that's Mr. Maynard. He's in charge of the accident department.
04:13LAUGHTER
04:15Good afternoon, Chief.
04:17I wonder if you would be kind enough
04:18to direct me and my son to the claims department.
04:21LAUGHTER
04:24Good afternoon, Chief.
04:26I wonder if you would be kind enough
04:28to direct me and my son to the claims department.
04:30Fist long.
04:31LAUGHTER
04:32My son wants to know where it is.
04:34I've just told you it's on the fifth floor.
04:35Oh, Dave.
04:36Er, no, we're not talking about the claims department.
04:38My son rather urgently requires to...
04:40Oh, Dave.
04:41Oh, Dave.
04:42Er, no, we're not talking about the claims department.
04:44My son rather urgently requires to...
04:45What's his hands?
04:46Yeah.
04:47What's his hands?
04:48Yeah.
04:49What's his hands?
04:50What?
04:51Dirty, are they?
04:52Dirty.
04:53You mistake my meaning.
04:54He wants to see a man about a dog.
04:55Dog?
04:56Don't allow no dogs in here, sir.
04:57What I'm trying to say is, er, not to put too far a point on it,
04:59to put it in place with a dog.
05:00Well, er, no, we're not talking about a claims department.
05:01Well, er, no, we're not talking about a claims department.
05:02My son rather urgently requires to...
05:03What's his hands?
05:04What's his hands?
05:05Yeah.
05:06What, dirty, are they?
05:07Dirty?
05:08You mistake my meaning.
05:09He wants to, er, see a man about a dog.
05:11Dog?
05:12Don't allow no dogs in here, sir.
05:13LAUGHTER
05:24He's got to beat about a bush.
05:25Yeah, Dad.
05:26He wants to turn his bike round.
05:29LAUGHTER
05:30Done well.
05:31Hey, Dad!
05:33Oh, yeah!
05:34I'm not getting through to you, am I?
05:36My son...
05:38What's his doing?
05:39Strain his greens!
05:41LAUGHTER
05:42Some kind of hook, is he?
05:45I want a carsey!
05:47A carsey, that's what I want!
05:49Through the door and on the right.
05:50OK, right.
05:51Get out of the way!
05:56Won't you say so in the first place?
06:03All right, Shirley.
06:06Blimey!
06:07He's in a bit of a hurry, isn't he?
06:08That serves him right.
06:09Plain speaking, is my motto.
06:10Come straight up with it.
06:11Call a spade a spade.
06:14Take care of all of it, George.
06:16I must go and point Percy at the porcelain.
06:18LAUGHTER
06:21Yes, madam?
06:34Miss.
06:35Miss?
06:36Can I help you?
06:37Well, I've got £100 and I want to take out an insurance.
06:41Oh, yes.
06:42Exactly what sort of insurance?
06:44Well, you read about these terrible things that happen in the Sunday papers.
06:49I go for a walk every afternoon and just suppose some tall, muscular man should suddenly seize me in his arms and smother me in hot, passionate kisses, then drag me in the bushes to have his wicked way with me.
07:03Oh, I see, Miss.
07:04Do you want to insure against that sort of thing happening?
07:07For £100, I want to insure that it does.
07:10LAUGHTER
07:12I'm very happy.
07:13Yes.
07:14Very happy.
07:15Looking for a nice young man.
07:16I'm terribly happy.
07:17I'm very happy.
07:18Can you just go up to the fourth floor, Matty, please?
07:26All right, son?
07:27Feeling better?
07:28Yes, thanks, Dad.
07:29I hope you remember to wash your hands.
07:30Oh, I did.
07:31Yes, I did.
07:32Yeah.
07:33Good.
07:34Not only that.
07:35What?
07:36I nicked the soap as well.
07:37Oh, you want to tip off the old block, ain't you?
07:38Yeah.
07:39OK, slip it in your pocket.
07:40I can't do that, Dad.
07:42Why not?
07:43I won't go in.
07:45LAUGHTER
07:48Take that crap in my head!
07:52Stay in your stumps.
07:53Get a move on.
07:54Shift yourself.
07:56Don't let go of my bag.
07:58Call yourself a man.
07:59You're pathetic.
08:00Just walking from the car park has ruined you.
08:03Weedy.
08:05Not just buffed.
08:06You're exhausted.
08:07No, no, my dear.
08:08Not really.
08:09Don't argue with me.
08:10When they took out your tonsils,
08:11they threw away the wrong bit.
08:13LAUGHTER
08:18Hey, you.
08:19Where do we go to get life insurance?
08:22Third floor, madam.
08:24Go on.
08:25Press the lift button if you've got the strength.
08:27Oh, you twisted my arm and forced me to marry you.
08:31I'll never know.
08:32My mother always said you were only after me body.
08:35LAUGHTER
08:36And I still don't know whether she was right or wrong.
08:3925 years and the marriage still hasn't been consummated.
08:43LAUGHTER
08:45Oh, not now, sexy lady!
08:49Listen, are you sure you've got the story right
08:52when we meet the bloke from the claims department?
08:54Of course I am.
08:55You know me.
08:56Yeah.
08:58That's why I'm asking.
09:00Let's just run through it again, just to make sure.
09:03Now, what are we claiming for?
09:06Our...
09:07Our garden shed got burned down.
09:09Right, right.
09:10Of course.
09:11How did it happen?
09:12You set fire to it.
09:14LAUGHTER
09:18No.
09:20No.
09:21Um...
09:23A spark?
09:24Hey.
09:25A spark from a...
09:27Oh, a spark.
09:28Oh, a spark from a neighbour's bonfire.
09:31Flew over the fence.
09:32Yeah.
09:33Try not to forget it, sir.
09:36Right, sir.
09:37If you will forward your policy, we'll take out your claim.
09:50Oh, sorry.
09:51Sorry.
09:55Can I help you, sir?
09:56Good day to you, Mr... Blackburn.
09:58Yes.
09:59My name's Scroosby, and this is Gaylord, my son.
10:03Yeah.
10:04This is my dad, Cyril.
10:06And his mum calls him Fat Bump.
10:12Yes.
10:13Well, um...
10:14What can I do for you, sir?
10:15We'd like to make a claim on a policy, what we have with your company.
10:19Yeah.
10:20Certainly.
10:21In what respect, sir?
10:22We had a fire.
10:24Our garden shed burnt down.
10:27To the ground.
10:29I see.
10:30And what was in the shed?
10:31Um...
10:32My Spider-Man comics.
10:34Next door's old, old ma.
10:36Oh.
10:37And, of course, my valuable collection of medieval brass rubbings.
10:41I see.
10:42And have you any idea how it happened?
10:44Um...
10:45A spark from a next-door neighbour's bonfire flew over and started it.
10:56I said it right, Dad.
10:59You said it right because it was right.
11:01That's exactly how it happened.
11:02I say, what rotten luck.
11:03You don't happen to have your insurance policy with you, by any chance.
11:06Indeed, we have.
11:07Give the gentleman the policy, son.
11:10Policy?
11:12I haven't got it.
11:13Yes, you have.
11:14That bit of paper I gave you last night for safekeeping.
11:17You stuffed it inside your jacket.
11:22Well, I haven't got it now.
11:23No, it really doesn't matter.
11:24All the details will be on our files.
11:26I wonder where it went, Dad.
11:28Well, the gentleman says it doesn't matter, so forget it.
11:30Have you any idea of the value of your claim?
11:33Oh, yes.
11:40Oh, it's about 50...
11:42Uh, 200...
11:43250.
11:44250 quid, yes.
11:47Yeah, I'm beginning to remember.
11:49Don't you bother your pretty little head, son.
11:52It's unimportant.
11:53250 pounds, yes, that sounds reasonable.
11:55Yeah, it's coming back to me.
11:57Mr. Blackburn doesn't want to hear about it, son.
12:00It's all right, Mr. Scroosby, let him tell me now he's remembered.
12:03Yeah, you see, it all started when Dad threw this can of petrol over the shed.
12:08I said, just a bit of paper to start this lot with.
12:11So I took this bit of paper out of my jacket and he set fire to it,
12:14threw it on the shed and that's how we...
12:18policy.
12:20I think I've got it wrong again.
12:21LAUGHTER
12:22I think I've got it wrong again.
12:23LAUGHTER
12:24I think I've got it wrong again.
12:27LAUGHTER
12:28I think I've got it wrong again.
12:30LAUGHTER
12:31LAUGHTER
12:32LAUGHTER
12:33LAUGHTER
12:34There!
12:35There!
12:36There!
12:37There!
12:38There!
12:39There!
12:40Come on!
12:41Come on!
12:42Here, grab all of that.
12:45You surely don't expect me to carry everything.
12:48LAUGHTER
12:49Now, dearest.
12:50Don't.
12:51Now, don't forget, that policy's worth £10,000 to me when you pop off.
12:56Which should be any minute now.
12:59You're only hanging on by your fingernails.
13:01Yes, but we've insured each other, haven't we, my dear?
13:04I mean, if you should unfortunately go first, I get the £10,000.
13:10Some old daft, Ed.
13:13You'll never outlive me.
13:15Unless you've got some funny notion in that space between your ears.
13:19LAUGHTER
13:20I don't know what you mean, my dear.
13:21No?
13:22Well, just to be on the safe side,
13:25you'll taste all the food I eat before I touch a mouthful.
13:29I'm going to assure you...
13:30You know more of that verbal abuse?
13:32Now then, when we get home, you'll make the beds,
13:36change the cap litter, do last night's washing up
13:39and get stuck into that ironing.
13:49All right, George. Five o'clock. Pack it up time. Off you go.
13:51Good night, Chief.
13:52Good night.
13:57Good night, Miss.
13:58Good night.
13:59Good night, sir.
14:00Good night.
14:01Good night, sir.
14:02Good night.
14:03Good night, Miss Williams.
14:04He hasn't gone yet, has he?
14:05Who?
14:06Oh, what's his name?
14:07The accident manager?
14:08No, not yet.
14:09Oh, good. It's got to be good for a laugh, isn't it?
14:10Good night, Miss Williams.
14:11It's going to come down cats and dogs.
14:12Here, give us that umbrella.
14:13Here, Archie.
14:14Now, you go and get the car, and here, take this,
14:18and I'll meet you by them steps.
14:20All right, dear.
14:21Good night, sir.
14:22I suppose, then.
14:23Good night, madam.
14:24Good night.
14:25Good night.
14:26He hasn't gone yet, has he?
14:28Who?
14:29Oh, what's his name?
14:30The accident manager?
14:31No, not yet.
14:32Oh, good.
14:33It's got to be good for a laugh, isn't it?
14:39Good night, Miss Williams.
14:40Good night.
14:41Good night.
14:49It missed me.
14:50It did.
14:51It certainly did.
14:53Oh, ho, ho, ho.
14:54Oh, ho, ho, ho.
14:55Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho.
15:01Oh, ho, ho, ho.
15:02Oh, ho, ho, ho.
15:03Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho.
15:04Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho.
15:05Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho.
15:06Excuse me, old chat.
15:07I'm all right up there.
15:09Oh, ho!
15:11Oh!
15:12Oh!
15:15Oh!
15:16Oh!
15:19You missed me.
15:20Oh!
15:24I'm OK.
15:25Yes, I'm all right.
15:27Well done, sir!
15:29Good night.
15:31I think you've checked it. Your luck's changed a lot.
15:43Yes, I think it has.
15:47Wonderful.
15:48Let's go.
16:01Let's go.
16:31Let's go.
17:01Let's go.
17:09I hope you don't think I was being rude, staring like that.
17:13But I wasn't quite sure.
17:15Pardon?
17:17I should have known, of course.
17:19But it's so long since I went to the theatre.
17:22Theatre?
17:23Or the cinema.
17:25You're Sir Lawrence, aren't you?
17:27Sir Lawrence?
17:29Yes, you know.
17:30Sir Lawrence Olivier.
17:31You're such a real dosh.
17:33Are you sure?
17:35You're about sure.
17:37Of course I'm sure.
17:39Sir Lawrence Olivier.
17:41Oh, come on.
17:45Sir Lawrence Olivier.
17:46Oh, come on.
17:47Oh, come on.
17:48Oh, come on.
17:49Oh, come on.
17:50Oh, come on.
17:51Oh, come on.
17:52Oh, come on.
17:53Oh, come on.
17:54Oh, come on.
17:55Sir Lawrence Olivier.
17:56There's something about doing a spot of bricklaying with some dead bodies or something.
18:01Anyway, I dare say you'd remembered a whole speech, Larry.
18:04I tell you, I am not Sir Lawrence Olivier.
18:06Oh, come on.
18:07You can't fool me.
18:08I mean, that profile gives you away.
18:11Except the nose, of course.
18:13False one, isn't it?
18:15Well, of course, it's understandable, really.
18:17I mean, you must get pestered by all sorts of strange people.
18:20Listen, I have been many things in my life, but I have never been Sir Lawrence Olivier.
18:25Surely even you must have noticed the age difference.
18:27Yes, I know, but I'm in a spot of make-up and all those lines and bags just disappear.
18:33I mean, he's older than me.
18:35Now, just leave me alone.
18:36No.
18:37You mean to say you're really not, Larry?
18:39I mean, you've never played Hamlet or Othello or Winnie the Pooh?
18:43No.
18:45Well, I, uh, I did once play Richard III at school.
18:50Really?
18:51Who won?
18:58And that was a joke, you see.
19:06You're not General de Gaulle, are you?
19:15General de Gaulle is dead.
19:17Don't evade the question.
19:19Of course, silly arse.
19:22Of course.
19:24What a fool I am.
19:26Of course, I know who you are.
19:28Who am I?
19:29You were on the television.
19:30Top of the Pops.
19:34Top of the Pops?
19:35Don't tell me you think I'm Jimmy Savile.
19:37Don't be ridiculous.
19:38I'm not stupid.
19:39I'm pretty bad to hear it.
19:40You're one of Pan's people.
19:45I'm one of Pan's people.
19:46There you are.
19:47You see, I was right.
19:49I was terribly sorry when you split up.
19:51Just on the record, which one of Pan's people am I?
19:56I'm not really good at names, but you're the one with the big, uh...
20:01You know, that's a marvellous disguise.
20:05You've made yourself look absolutely repulsive.
20:10Stupid man.
20:11If you don't stop pestering me, I shall have to move to another compartment.
20:18I give up.
20:19Who are you?
20:22My name happens to be Ernest Peebles.
20:25Peebles?
20:27Not the first man to climb Everest.
20:30That was Sir Edmund Hillary.
20:32Oh, that's right, yes.
20:33I knew it was a name like Peebles.
20:36For the last time, will you shut your silly mouth and leave me in peace?
20:40Well, no need to take that tone.
20:43After all, when two famous people meet, it's quite normal for them to pass a few pleasantries.
20:48I tell you, I am not famous.
20:56Excuse me.
20:58Yes?
20:59Two famous people.
21:00Yes.
21:01You mean you are famous?
21:02Well, I don't like to talk about myself.
21:05I'm too modest.
21:07Modest and famous.
21:08I don't recognise you.
21:09Who are you?
21:10Well, I, um, I don't like to let on, really.
21:16Security reasons.
21:18You can call me Philip.
21:21Philip?
21:22I mean, after all, we are friends.
21:26Duke of Edinburgh is so formal.
21:29Don't be so ridiculous, you don't resemble him in the slightest.
21:31No, no, no, no.
21:32But you see, in public, I have a standing.
21:34Security.
21:35Man.
21:36Completely man.
21:37There you are, my dear.
21:38Winds are all ready.
21:39Well, goodbye, old chap.
21:40I hope we bump into each other again on this run.
21:41So nice.
21:43Thank you, my dear.
21:44Winds are all ready.
21:46Well, goodbye, old chap.
21:48I hope we bump into each other again on this run.
21:51So nice.
22:12What's going on?
22:14with anything...
22:22?
22:24It's all real.
22:32Well, it's all real.
22:34But we'll stop.
22:36No ignorant peasant will be out and about tonight! Excellent! No interruptions! And the noise of the thunder will drown that of my experiments!
22:54Tonight is the night! No power on earth can stop me creating life! One single charge of 30,000 volts and this thing will live!
23:11Nothing can stop me now! Nothing and nobody!
23:17Hello?
23:21Meet a reader!
23:26Get out! You blundering peasant!
23:28You can't talk to me like that! I'm from the electricity board!
23:32Get out! Get off my property!
23:36Get your foot out! You cannot enter! I'm busy!
23:41And I'm wet! Come on! It's hissing down out here!
23:45Can't you come back later?
23:47Not without a kayak! Come on! Let us in!
23:49Boss! How many of you are there?
23:51Me and a couple of mackerel! Come on!
23:53Come on! It's chucking it down here!
23:55Be gone! You're standing in the way of science!
23:57I'm standing in the way of a monsoon!
23:59Look, the clipboard's getting salty! Let us in!
24:01You shall not come in!
24:03Listen, if you don't let me in, I'll bung in an estimated region and make your eyes water!
24:08Oh! Confound you!
24:10I've got to work for Mr. Card from the letterbox!
24:16Now, why?
24:18Since you're nestled at the last two portlers!
24:26Here!
24:28Your next bill's going to be a bit substantial, isn't it?
24:31I've only got you down for an immersion eater!
24:34Look, stop bothering me! You'll find your wretched meter near the end of the operating table!
24:40Damn radio ants!
24:44And again!
24:46Yeah, no ants!
24:47Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
24:53Ah, no!
24:54Hi.
24:57Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
24:59Ha ha ha ha!
25:00Ha ha ha ha VN
25:03Ha ha ha ha ha!
25:05Ah ha ha ha!
25:07How is your wife?
25:09Say, I say, squire, what is it now?
25:22Your mate's had a skimful, ain't he, eh?
25:25Last time I saw a face like that,
25:27it was on a slab with some parsley round it.
25:29Oh, dear, you disturb my creation!
25:32Disturb? You must be joking.
25:33You'll get no action out of him this side of the epilogue, I'll tell you.
25:37Mind you, my dad was the same.
25:39And my dad, he loved his glass of beer.
25:42Be quiet, I do not wish to hear about your relations.
25:46Sorry.
25:54Bloody hell.
25:58Yeah, you know, the strange thing about my old man was
26:00that no hangover ever got the better of him.
26:03I remember one day we thought we'd snuffed it.
26:05For four hours he lay there without moving a muscle.
26:09And my mum, she got a mirror and put it in front of his mouth
26:12to see if he was still breathing.
26:13Did it steam up?
26:14No.
26:15All the silver peeled off the back.
26:16So, uh, we thought he was all right, you know, and we left him there.
26:22Anyway.
26:24Oh, be careful.
26:25Oh, sorry.
26:26A few hours later, he staggered downstairs,
26:28looking like death on a stick.
26:31We was awestruck, we were.
26:33And then he spoke.
26:36And it was like a voice from the grave.
26:39He said,
26:40Get me a plate of cold faggots.
26:45Faggots?
26:46Yes.
26:46So we got him a plate of cold faggots,
26:48and he said,
26:49Get me a cup of cold tea.
26:51Tea?
26:51So we got him a cup of cold tea,
26:54and he poured the tea all over the faggots,
26:55stirred it up with his fingers and ate it.
26:57No hesitation.
26:59Now, mark my words.
27:01Here was a man gripped firmly between the jaws of death.
27:04Ah.
27:05About as much life in him as the House of Lords on Derby Day.
27:09And yet, with him minutes of drinking that concoction of his own invention,
27:13what do you think?
27:14I cannot imagine.
27:15He was as sick as a ruddy dog.
27:16Oh, you do not realize the importance of what I am doing here.
27:22Ah.
27:22I am going to show you something incredible.
27:26Something that will strike terror into the heart of any normal man.
27:31This man has never lived.
27:36Derby daft.
27:37You don't get bags like that under your eyes playing, Ludo.
27:40Look.
27:40Those arms and legs each come from different bodies.
27:48Don't you see?
27:49It is a monstrosity.
27:51Stitched together from the stiffened limbs of dead men.
27:55Have you ever seen anything like it?
27:57Yeah.
27:58We had 11 of them last year at the Oval.
28:01Now, I, I, Frankenstein,
28:04will put 30,000 volts into him and create life.
28:07No, you can't do that.
28:08Life itself.
28:08Just tell me, read it.
28:09In the air of the speech.
28:14The storm we've been struck.
28:20Listen.
28:21Did you hear that cry of rage?
28:23I expect he's got an headache.
28:24No, no, no.
28:25Look, he's alive.
28:27Well, I'm going home now.
28:29We'll send you a postcard next time.
28:30Why, he speaks wonder upon wonder.
28:34I want.
28:39You, you, you, you want.
28:41I want.
28:45Yeah, yeah.
28:46You want.
28:47Well, what do you want?
28:49I want to tell you a story.
28:55So, don't leave me alone with him.
29:01I'll tell you what.
29:02Slip a bow tie over his head
29:04and you can take it to Blackpool for a summer season.
29:05and I'll tell you what he aims to blow, Mr. Wayne.
29:10I want to tell you what he aims to do.
29:32Turn that bloody thing off!
29:34What?
29:35The Hoover!
29:39I couldn't hear you for the Hoover.
29:40What is it?
29:41You let my pigeons out?
29:42Yes, the smell in the bedroom was terrible.
29:45Well, they would have been used to it.
29:56To think you used to be the king of Siam!
29:59What do you mean, used to be?
30:01I'm just in temporary exile, that's all.
30:04Temporary exile? Given the elbow, you mean.
30:07And for God's sake, wear some shoes.
30:09You're not in Siam now.
30:11Don't I know it?
30:12I used to be king.
30:14I used to king it with the best of them, I did.
30:16You were pathetic.
30:17I was the king, my flower.
30:19Your actual monarch.
30:21And to think I'd give it up for you.
30:25I'm all the way to Acton for a love of a governor.
30:28I captured your heart.
30:31Ah, you got the lot.
30:32And all because I put you in the...
30:34Now, don't you be coarse.
30:36I ruled over thousands of loyal subjects.
30:41I ruled over a court the magnificent of which was unequalled in all history.
30:46I had 17 wives and 38 children.
30:4939.
30:5039?
30:51Tracy, you remember our daughter?
30:55Oh, God help us, Tracy.
30:57Oh, blimey.
30:58Is she still going out with that scruffy Henry with the earring and the funny cigarettes?
31:04You mean Wayne?
31:05Wayne.
31:06Gordon Bennett.
31:08Fine son-in-law for a king he'll make.
31:10No, they haven't said anything about getting married.
31:13What?
31:14No predator of mine is going to pick it in sin.
31:18No.
31:19I've come from an unbroken line of Eastern potentates.
31:23God blimey, what have I come to?
31:25I don't know.
31:2637.
31:27Lloyd George Villas, Acton.
31:30I know it.
31:31I'm a good mind to leg you back to Siam to see if the job's still going.
31:36Well, you know it isn't.
31:38There was a coup.
31:39Eh?
31:40There's a coup.
31:42Oh, perhaps them pigeons have come back.
31:45A coup, a revolution.
31:47Oh.
31:48Your cousin Prince Peter Luke's the ruler now.
31:51The Great Puff.
31:53You know what they call him back now?
31:55The Queen of Siam.
31:57All them bangles and rings.
32:00Blimey, look who's talking.
32:01What are you talking about?
32:02You all brunner dresses like this in the film?
32:05He wasn't in Acton.
32:06Lucky him.
32:09Here.
32:10I'm hungry.
32:11I'm going to the pub.
32:12And when I come back, I want crushed gnat's wings
32:16and a pheasant in aspic.
32:19Fish fingers.
32:20Oh, God blimey.
32:22Another royalty-free gone for a burton.
32:24Here, where's my hat?
32:25It's parky out.
32:27Now then, don't go near that bowling alley.
32:29Why not?
32:30Because someone might stick their fingers in your ears again.
32:33Let me tell you that this bald head is symbolic of my virility.
32:39Symbolic of your virility?
32:40Yes.
32:41Yeah, you're right.
32:42There's nothing there.
32:45That does it.
32:46I'm going down to the duck and pull it.
32:48I don't know what time I'll be back,
32:49so leave the royal key under the ceremonial mat.
32:52You can whistle for it.
32:53Curtsy, woman.
32:54Bow down when the royal person is leaving the room.
32:57Oh, knickers.
33:00Oh, here's me hat.
33:05I don't suppose you've got any money?
33:08Are you aware that a royal personage does not carry money?
33:11Well, under the clock, there's a quid.
33:13I know not of what you speak.
33:30Here, look what the chap brought in.
33:32Prince Peter Luke.
33:33Yeah, tell her what happened.
33:34There's been another coup.
33:36I've been overthrown.
33:40What a shame.
33:41Come down to the pub, Petal.
33:42Drown your sorrows in a port and lemon.
33:44All right.
33:45Ta-da, Elves.
33:46Ta-da.
33:47Oh, no.
34:13Ring Nixon.
34:14Ring Nixon.
34:15You're a bit behind the times, aren't you?
34:17you're not going down the pub then
34:27no
34:27gets a bit rowdy down there for Saturday
34:47you're not going down the pub then
35:17you're not going down the pub then
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