Going Ass Up

Beasley Digital

Dave & Chuck the Freak read an e-mail from a listener who is having trouble getting happy endings during massages and take a call from a guy with experience who shares a few tips.

Transcript

00:00one more quick email this guy i can't believe people have trouble with this

00:08and especially what he says but he said i love the show i listen daily like a listener who wrote

00:13into you guys a while ago i'm having a problem getting a happy ending now i'm a six foot five

00:19dude athletic build longer hair short beard i've been called about an eight or nine and i paid a

00:26hundred bucks for a really crappy massage many times and none of them ever touch me yeah it's a

00:33copper yeah they think you're a cop said the thing is my wife died about eight months ago so i'm not

00:38ready for tinder or anything like that yet i just want a release yeah they think you're a cop dude

00:45you're way too in shape you're super tall right you've got like the exact undercover cop right look

00:53how many good-looking dudes go for a really how many good-looking dudes you think they see it

00:58rub and tug yeah uh never dude yeah i don't know how to tell a widower to get a hand job

01:04it's not our forte it's not our forte i don't know how to tell him i don't know how to deal

01:12with his grief i don't know how to tell him where to get jerked i can't help you man

01:17i'm not qualified james would jerk you man james would do it i'll be right there

01:26yeah jason momoa needs a hand job james if you don't mind he's just a new widower

01:35yeah i'm not qualified to handle widower hand job needs well so voice changing technology

01:41anonymous here he considers himself a six but you have advice for this guy i do you know as a

01:48somebody who has had many experiences i think the best thing to do works every time for me

01:56go in there naked have your ass up either do that or lay on your back you got to show something you

02:03got to show that you're not hiding anything you're not scared to show anything um so go in there ass up

02:09is that what you're saying i'm writing this down ass up no towel if there's a sheet if there's a

02:16towel don't use it ah just put yourself out there ass up donger out every time okay yeah that's what

02:24that's what other people are saying he's got to get naked whip your dong out because no cop is

02:27gonna gotta they'll know for sure that you are ready for that if you're nude right yeah just sit

02:34there on the table first thing spread eagle with your dong hanging out we're gonna get this poor guy

02:38tased it's gonna go to a thing with his dick out we're gonna get him tased or jerk and get pepper

02:47sprayed on his balls oh i think that if he if it turns out to be a legitimate place they'll just

02:51say sir would you mind covering up like i think they're professional right he's not going to

02:56professional place going ass up anywhere is real bold if i did it right now you guys would be really

03:01upset yes we would be like what was it like i'd be like i was bold yeah very bold uh ass up

03:10it's funny i would think that i would go ass down yeah ass down right dong up that guy said ass up

03:22so just go with ass up yeah if you go ass up i think you're you're gonna get you're gonna i think

03:29because they do the classic massage move oh classic do you hear lisa's anal penetration sound

03:36that's what i think yeah i think you get a little it's like almost like a cop chirp that

03:43thing their vehicle does

03:44when they're just trying to get you to move out of their way yeah

03:53you're right though i think ass down ass down is much more solid advice ass down

04:06yeah i'd go ass down and smack them a bit

04:12i shouldn't have gone ass up

04:16i'm fine with it it does work

04:27if i went ass up i'd be getting a little more than i bargained for maybe that call

04:34collar guy he likes a little bit yeah

04:37oh no this one wanna peg

04:41prepare it to peg

04:42hey what are you doing in there

04:44prepare it to peg

04:46oh i hear it okay i know what you're doing

04:49okay

04:51keep it down in there

04:54oh my god

04:57he went the ass up

04:59he not done yet

05:00you're going the ass up

05:03someone said the naked man works two out of three times

05:05two out of three times he works every time

05:08the naked man works every time

05:13the naked man works

05:13except when it doesn't

05:15people also do believe that we're gonna get him tased

05:17so we hope we don't get him tased

05:18yeah he might get tased

05:19but if you're really desperate you go nude

05:22ass or dong up

05:23and just let him know

05:25he is he's gonna he's gonna literally come to the radio station

05:27be like thanks guys

05:28i'm the widower that was looking for a hand job

05:31got arrested

05:33just got out

05:34of jail

05:35went ass up

05:38you know where else i went ass up

05:40in prison

05:41oh no

05:42i'll tell you what

05:43there wasn't a shortage of people who wanted to jerk me

05:45prison

05:47good luck to you dude

05:49let us know if you ever get any luck

05:51and i got whoop whooped a few times

05:53oh no

05:54she whoop whooped me

05:55people are wanting him to prepare to peg

05:58prepare to peg

06:00you

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