Diarrhea Road Trip

Beasley Digital

Dave & Chuck the Freak talk about a guy who almost died in a Taco Bell drive-thru and then imagine a TV series where James guides Dave through convenience store foods.

Transcript

00:00now james i hope to god nothing like this ever does happen to you but because you spend a lot

00:12of time in taco bell drive-thrus yeah what's wrong with that you never know what could happen there

00:17right keeps me out of trouble i could be out doing drugs and hood stuff exactly hood stuff

00:22yeah uh taco bell workers saved a man's life in the drive-thru they truly are doing god's work

00:29yeah they are uh they noticed the drive-thru line kind of came to a halt the other day

00:33they were seeing cars and hearing the bell go off but no one was coming through the drive-thru

00:37so then they looked on the camera they saw a car was parked the wrong way it kind of rolled into

00:43the drive-thru line and was blocking it and when they went outside to check there was a guy slumped

00:47over the wheel oh so you think hammered but it was worse than that one guy parked the car they both

00:57pulled him out put him on the ground his hands and fingertips were blue but they found a pulse

01:02but it was real vague there's a little bit of the surveillance video of this

01:06what's this guy doing i can hate i can drink i'm just here for i'm gonna take his taco bell he

01:11didn't need that he just wants to push the car out of here let me get this out of here

01:14is this gonna take all day i'm on the one job oh man yeah it's fine i got the doritos locos tacos

01:21hang on they're safe he's blue as he's blue as can be but uh tacos time still hot uh one of the

01:31workers she's worked at taco bell for about 14 years but she previously worked as home health care

01:36so she knew first aid she started cpr until the fire truck came uh when first responders picked him

01:43up his hand grabbed the guy's arm and he was coming back so she just ran outside smoked a cigarette and

01:50cried it's a rarity that there's somebody i feel i don't know but i would assume there's a rarity

01:55that there's somebody on the staff at a fast food joint that can do mouth-to-mouth for such i agree

02:00yeah yeah back through all my years at the gas station all my time at the gas station yeah i was taught a

02:05lot of food safety like how to prepare food and how to not contaminate food and keeping like the

02:11grills and stuff clean yes never like if somebody bites into a buffalo chicken log and they're choking

02:16on your gas station floor do you know what to do i'd be no i'd run and cry i'd go for help and lock

02:22the doors yeah no but once the ambulance shows up i'm gonna watch a guy die because uh no buffalo

02:27chicken log but if they they're going to be eating those their last thing on light on the planet was a

02:32buffalo chicken log that's it it's the saddest way to go guys i'm telling you this right now

02:39there are people that that's the last thing they had chicken logs yeah the worst would be one of the

02:44cheeseburger logs the cheeseburger because that looks like it looks like i'm a turd you think that

02:49there's probably just tasty turd delicious tasty two percent of deaths might be log related

02:55how many logs i think it's probably like that's a great one question and point point zero eight

03:01points that's around it point zero eight percent are log related deaths oh my food log cheeseburger

03:06logs yeah there it is oh my god look at that perfect form on the ketchup and mustard along that that

03:13doesn't look right it is not of god it is so delicious though oh my god it looks wild can you

03:20believe i've lived my life without eating a log you can't live then dave i know i need to take

03:24dave i've never okay i've never i've got to do like a road trip where i do i've never been to a

03:30waffle house what a diarrhea road trip

03:32because go through all the places that you want to go to a waffle house a waffle house right

03:49yeah okay oh what's the other one there's another uh now with five breaking news

03:55yeah well there's a bunch of those places that the diners drive-ins and dives like i've had like

04:06a little list in my phone if i ever go somewhere they make more sense to me than like you just

04:11wanted to hit a waffle house you wanted to hit the circle k roller grill but i've never had

04:16roller grills like there's a bunch of stuff i've never tried in my life never been to uranus fudge

04:19never been to uranus fudge no you haven't had like uh you know the foot long 7-eleven

04:26foot long hot dog with cheese sauce oh yeah the cheese whiz oh no i've never had that i don't eat

04:33like convenience store or gas station food i've never had right most people don't yeah people like me

04:39you've got to fall into it sometimes you know just that it wasn't my choice stuff that's just rolling

04:44in the open yeah i don't want to put in my mouth rolling in the open do you have any food that's

04:49been rolling in the open just above where it'll kill you with diseases i don't know how you could

04:55resist i don't know i'm like somebody put some fresh wieners on the grill

04:59so that way when it's time to uh throw them away i can just have them for dinner so that is how it

05:06could work you'd be able to be like uh you would technically have thrown them away right yeah you

05:12would have thrown them away yeah me using my managerial uh power yes hey billy you want that

05:19roller grill dog has been thrown away have yourself a wiener wow or if i was like oh man we have

05:24three cheeseburger logs on the grill that nobody bought i don't believe this i'm gonna eat like a

05:29king tonight i don't believe i believe it i believe you have three dogs left but if i do

05:36ever do my diarrhea road trip uh you'll have to be your guy i'll be my diarrhea guide for you

05:41i just know that lisa has talked to you somehow dave and lisa have talked about getting an rv

05:48and doing a road trip like that just don't do the diarrhea one right dave okay lisa don't she's

05:55stop that now yeah no i know she is he rolls up and he's like you ready to get diarrhea

05:59diarrhea 2020 grow your hair out dye it super blonde and then diarrhea diners and drive

06:07i'm diarrhea fietti

06:09be a good show james taking me all over trying delicacies i've never explored before you're

06:17you're like the roller dogs okay oh yeah here it comes

06:22there's all sorts of slow motion running great idea

06:29pepto-bismol sponsors we drive we drive in a giant pink motorhome yeah that's awesome with

06:35their logo on the side i love it get the guy that's in the commercial to open the door for

06:39you when you go in the place and be like he'll be like

06:41diarrhea diners and drive but james would never have it he'd be you'd be oh no he'd be driving

06:52diarrhea well i just ate four of those cheeseburger logs yeah yeah well you've got an iron stomach

06:57there'd be like the number of days since james pooped it'd be like a counter

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07:18you

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