Kyrie's Revenge Arc Could Be Magnificent - Barstool Rundown - May 30th, 2024
John Rich | Barstool Rundown
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00:00 (upbeat music)
00:02 - Okay, it's the rundown Thursday, May 30th.
00:06 Let's talk a little bit about Pardon My Cheesesteak
00:08 before we start.
00:09 It is the pickup and delivery only restaurant
00:11 bringing you craveable cheesesteaks, tenders,
00:14 loaded fries and desserts for lunch, dinner and late night.
00:16 I mean, if you follow anything,
00:17 Pardon My Take, you see them all the time.
00:18 They look absolutely delicious.
00:19 They had that truck parked out here for a while.
00:21 God damn.
00:22 You're like our food connoisseur here.
00:23 What do you think?
00:24 - So when we tried to do the bigger menu,
00:25 remember it was like a big barstool menu?
00:27 It was just like two all over the place.
00:30 The only thing that was selling
00:32 that people liked overwhelmingly were these.
00:34 - Pardon My Cheesesteak.
00:35 - So everybody else who had a sandwich or a dessert
00:37 got kicked out and they just went Pardon My Cheesesteak.
00:39 And I think it's doing pretty well.
00:41 I've had it at a NASCAR event and you're right.
00:44 Yeah, they're very good.
00:45 Very good cheesesteak.
00:45 - You know, anytime you watch one of those cooking shows,
00:47 like the first thing or like Hell's Kitchen, whatever,
00:49 the first, what's the one where he goes around,
00:51 Kitchen Nightmares.
00:51 - Yeah, Kitchen Nightmares.
00:52 - Where he goes around, the first thing he does
00:53 is pare down the menu to what they do best.
00:54 - Yes. - Pardon My Cheesesteak.
00:55 - Skews. - Yes.
00:56 - Get the skews down. - Skews down.
00:58 - There it is.
00:58 - Choose our expanded menu that has a regular cheesesteak,
01:01 Chipotle cheesesteaks, Chipotle chicken, Buffalo chicken,
01:03 chicken, bacon, ranch cheesesteaks,
01:04 and their newly added Buffalo tender sub.
01:06 That sounds amazing.
01:07 - That doesn't sound bad.
01:08 - Yeah, which features crispy chicken tenders,
01:10 tossed in Buffalo sauce, topped with ranch, pickles,
01:12 and toasted, or not toasted, hoagie roll.
01:14 You can order the Big Cat Combo and get your cheesesteak
01:16 of choice, fries, and a drink.
01:18 And don't forget the Max Special two sodas.
01:20 - Oh man. - Oh man.
01:21 - God damn. - Fat boy Max.
01:22 - Yeah.
01:23 - We should name that after someone here,
01:24 the two soda special.
01:25 - Yes. - Yeah, yeah.
01:26 With more than 1,500 locations worldwide,
01:29 you can find a Part of My Cheesesteak near you
01:31 and order now at pardonmycheesesteak.com,
01:33 or by going to the QR code on the screen right here,
01:34 use code PMC20 for 20% off your order.
01:37 Isn't PMC a private military company also?
01:39 - I think so, yeah.
01:40 - They should maybe work on the air.
01:42 - Yeah.
01:43 - Shout out to Part of My Cheesesteak.
01:44 Last night in the NHL, the Oilers beat the Stars 5-2,
01:47 series tied 2-2.
01:49 Connor McDavid robbed by a goal
01:50 by the goalie's stick lying on the ice.
01:51 The one thing I'd seen really from this
01:53 was that Big Cat Wright had tweeted,
01:55 like, "Connor McDavid goal, count on it, count on it,
01:58 it's happening, it's happening."
01:59 And then, of course, the puck just nudges,
02:01 just gets stopped right before crossing the line.
02:04 Just absolute misery.
02:05 - Brutal, here it is.
02:06 - Yeah, look at that.
02:07 - Oh!
02:09 - Feels like that maybe shouldn't be allowed
02:11 to lay your stick on the ice.
02:13 - Did he purposely do it?
02:14 - No, I don't think he purposely did it,
02:16 but I was kinda surprised that it was.
02:19 - It's awesome.
02:20 - Just brutal.
02:21 Watching that on replay in-game,
02:23 that would drive me insane.
02:25 - Do you guys agree that playoff hockey
02:27 is one of the best sporting events to see live?
02:31 - I think hockey in general is one of the best
02:33 sporting events to watch live.
02:34 - I can't watch it on TV, I don't enjoy,
02:35 and I'm so old I can't follow the puck,
02:37 maybe, or something like that,
02:38 but we had gone to, we had watched a playoff game in Vegas.
02:43 - Sure, yeah.
02:45 - Went to that stadium, what a great place.
02:46 - Oh my God, I heard their stadium is nuts.
02:47 - It's awesome, and to see anything,
02:49 but yeah, it was at T-Mobile.
02:52 I also did the NFL game out there last year,
02:54 and man, it was fucking great,
02:55 but yeah, NHL playoffs is electric,
02:57 particularly if you get a chance to see it live,
02:59 and if you get a chance to see it here in New York.
03:01 - And your son's girlfriend is out in Vegas,
03:03 Rachelle Ryan, she lives out in Vegas.
03:04 - That's right, yeah, yeah, yeah.
03:05 - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Rachelle Ryan.
03:06 - Exactly.
03:07 - Jerry's, or I don't, she's been making the,
03:10 she's in like a fantasy football league
03:11 with people here too now?
03:12 - I think so.
03:13 - She probably, she's a goat, I love her.
03:15 - She, yeah, she--
03:16 - Both throat and otherwise.
03:17 - Actively tells me, you know, send 'em over.
03:19 I'm like, yeah.
03:20 (laughing)
03:22 - In the NBA, the Mavericks and Timberwolves,
03:24 Mavericks have a 3-1 lead,
03:25 Mavericks pretty much a done deal.
03:27 Does Minnesota have a chance to be the first team ever
03:29 to come back and win a series down 3-0?
03:31 - I don't like that you just said that, done deal.
03:33 - Yeah, I mean.
03:34 - I don't like that at all.
03:35 - That's, I mean, I don't mean done deal in this game.
03:36 - I know, I know that they won the last game,
03:39 but it's one of these things where it's too good
03:42 to be true if this happens.
03:43 Like, what was it, last year where it was shaping up
03:45 where it could have been Lakers, Celtics,
03:47 and then things went a little bit left?
03:49 It's not over 'til it's over,
03:50 but I would love to see that.
03:53 - I think I purposely, I very much want to see Mavericks
03:56 versus Celtics in this finals,
03:57 and luckily it's shaping up that way,
03:59 because obviously the Kyrie versus Boston storyline
04:02 is amazing.
04:03 - Oh yeah. - It's gonna be incredible.
04:04 - And shout out to my girl Cara at the Celtics,
04:06 I know you're working on tickets for me right now.
04:07 - Oh!
04:08 - Cara, I love you to death,
04:09 anything you want, you let me know.
04:11 She hooked it up last, two years ago
04:13 when we were playing the Warriors, game four, we lost.
04:15 Could make it up to me this year with some tickets.
04:17 I think it's gonna be all time.
04:18 I think Kyrie has been,
04:21 like he seems to be in a good place mentally,
04:23 like you see his smile on his press conferences,
04:24 he's going on inside the NBA, all that.
04:26 I hope he can reach into his bag
04:30 and find the villain,
04:32 not like the crazy off guy that he was,
04:35 but I hope he needles the Boston crowd,
04:37 because there is no fan base in any sport at all
04:42 that will latch on to hatred like a Boston sports team.
04:46 - Yeah, specifically-- - Especially the
04:47 type of hatred too.
04:49 - Yeah, especially if you wronged us,
04:50 like you are, good lord, it's gonna be unreal.
04:54 I think Dave will be there obviously.
04:55 - Yeah.
04:56 - He'll be on the wood.
04:57 He was talking about on the, on Name Show today,
04:59 he would skip in order to stay in surviving Barstool,
05:01 I think he had something going on.
05:03 Erno in Sandbagger, I think he was gonna do.
05:06 Dozen, I don't know, something, he said he would do that.
05:08 But regardless, I mean this is gonna be,
05:11 this is gonna be all time.
05:12 And I think if there's a year to do it
05:13 for the Celtics, it's this year.
05:15 - Cool, Boston absolutely burned down
05:16 if Kyrie beats you in Boston to win the finals.
05:18 - He won't beat us, there's not a chance.
05:20 - You don't think there's not a chance?
05:21 - I didn't mean--
05:22 - You felt, you thought I was done for saying a done deal.
05:24 I said done deal, you say not a chance?
05:26 - If you look at like superstar power, right?
05:28 Like there's Kyrie and there's Luka
05:30 versus like our whole team.
05:32 Like that, just the making of that series will be so good
05:36 because there's two guys on Dallas
05:37 who you know the ball is going to.
05:40 - Porzingis will be back too.
05:42 - I don't even like, I don't even care that much
05:44 about Porzingis' back.
05:46 Like when you lose a star player
05:48 and then your team gels and they make it
05:49 and they bring the star player back in,
05:51 it almost like, obviously I want him back,
05:54 it almost like fucks things up a little.
05:55 I'm not worried that we don't have him, so I don't know.
05:57 - You can have a double revenge game,
05:58 from Kyrie to you and then Porzingis to the Mavericks.
06:00 - Yeah, we have a DRG.
06:02 - DRG, everyone talks about those.
06:04 And tonight in NHL, Panthers at the Rangers.
06:06 Tigers is tied 2-2, the Rangers haven't won
06:08 a Stanley Cup since '94, haven't reached
06:10 the Stanley Cup since 2014, that was a rough,
06:11 I remember that one, Kings, right?
06:13 They haven't won a professional sports championship
06:14 since 2011, sad times.
06:17 I will say when the Knicks were still in it.
06:19 - Sad times.
06:20 - It just has been, it's been rough, been rough for us.
06:22 But it's, while the Knicks were still involved
06:25 in the playoffs, the energy here was awesome.
06:27 It was just--
06:27 - Oh dude, it's the best.
06:28 - So much fun, 'cause the Knicks fans,
06:29 I think, just are way more like, I don't know,
06:31 just out in the streets and shit and like very loud
06:33 and about--
06:34 - I think it's like Boston, like I didn't go
06:36 to a playoff game this year, I went to a playoff game
06:38 last time, I guess two years ago at the Knicks?
06:40 Trae Young?
06:41 - Yeah, yeah.
06:41 - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
06:42 - That's when you developed all that age.
06:43 - Yeah, and you're talking about like Boston fans
06:45 going nuts on Kyrie, which they have a right to.
06:47 The way Knicks fans were going on Trae Young,
06:51 particularly his hairline, was classic.
06:53 - It had the Tootsie Pop with hair on it.
06:55 - Tootsie Pop with hair on it.
06:56 - It like fell on the ground.
06:57 - Yeah, yeah.
06:58 - That was tough.
06:59 - I remember, I mean, you guys don't remember,
07:01 but I remember when the Rangers won 94,
07:03 'cause I had just gotten out, I had just started
07:05 on the floor of the American Stock Exchange.
07:07 Yes, I was getting out of college,
07:08 and it was fucking wild time.
07:10 - Yeah.
07:11 - Mark Leitz, you don't realize how many hockey fans
07:14 come out of Woodwork once the Rangers start doing well.
07:17 - They gotta look, too.
07:18 Like a New York sports fan, like, I will still say it.
07:22 I think New York sports fans in general,
07:24 they're like Boston sports fans,
07:25 but like a little more douchey.
07:26 Like, look at the Yankees guys.
07:28 I don't have the hatred that I had for New York sports fans
07:30 now that I've been growing up with the Giants
07:33 and the Red Sox and all that, but I'll go to a bar
07:36 and like will watch the Rangers game.
07:38 I love seeing fan bases that are into it.
07:41 - Yeah.
07:42 - Like, they are very much into it.
07:44 - Is there a sport where more people wear jerseys
07:48 than at hockey games?
07:50 I think hockey games has that lock.
07:52 - Soccer, maybe?
07:53 - Yeah.
07:53 - Maybe soccer.
07:54 - A kit?
07:55 - But is that really a sport?
07:56 - They do have a good kit over there.
07:57 I also wanna shout out Uncle Pete,
07:58 head coach of the Rangers.
08:00 I will be coming up--
08:01 - Anybody else wanna give me tickets?
08:01 - I will be coming up to your place again
08:03 in New Hampshire this year.
08:04 Major shout out, I heard you got a new jet ski,
08:06 so we're looking forward to that.
08:07 - Do you know anybody at the French Open?
08:08 - French Open?
08:09 - Yeah.
08:10 - Not quite.
08:11 - That's a good point.
08:12 - Yeah.
08:13 - Day three of a two week tournament,
08:13 the French Open officials have banned spectators
08:15 from drinking alcohol in the stands at Roland Garros.
08:18 - It's such a French thing to do.
08:19 - Yeah, for the rest of the tournament,
08:21 after fans spat chewing gum at tennis player David Goffin,
08:24 tournament director says the most experienced umpires
08:26 will be assigned to the most potentially volatile matches.
08:29 Now umpires have been instructed to crack down
08:30 on bad behavior and that fans will be ejected
08:31 from the stadium.
08:33 No fun league, I mean, this is so French.
08:35 - He threw gum at the guy?
08:37 - He spat gum.
08:37 - Who cares?
08:38 - Yeah, I mean, I feel like you just,
08:39 that's something you get in the sporting arena.
08:41 - That wasn't because he's drunk,
08:42 that's because he's a scumbag.
08:43 - Yeah, he's a scumbag French Open fan.
08:46 I don't think that's something you can,
08:47 you can't ban, once you start banning alcohol,
08:49 where does it end?
08:50 And for France, you're supposed to be all about
08:51 freedom, liberty and all that stuff,
08:52 you guys inspired that?
08:54 - Yeah.
08:54 - That's kind of like, I feel like,
08:55 anti-ethical to their whole existence as a people.
08:57 - Reminds me a little bit about 1939.
08:59 - Yeah, I mean, a lot of other mistakes they made there.
09:01 Imagine no line, this is like their own imagine no line.
09:04 - People are just gonna bypass and sneak alcohol in,
09:05 just like the Germans did when they blitzkrieged.
09:07 - I will tell you that this might cause more sober people
09:10 to bring gum into the stadium,
09:11 and do that on purpose, right, to toss it.
09:13 And I will tell you, I was supposed to go to Saudi
09:17 for one of these fights with the zone people.
09:19 - Republic stoning during Pride Month?
09:21 - Yes, exactly.
09:22 Then they found out I was friends with Patty,
09:24 and they were like, no go.
09:25 But they have no alcohol in the stands
09:28 during these fights, and because of the timing,
09:31 the main event doesn't go off 'til like 4.30 a.m.
09:33 Saudi, there is the greatest fights in the world
09:36 they're putting together, and it's like they're fighting
09:38 them in a fucking morgue.
09:39 - Yeah.
09:40 - Because these people are there at 4.30 in the morning,
09:41 no booze, and I'm just ready to go to sleep.
09:44 So this is a huge, huge mistake on their,
09:47 a huge overreaction.
09:48 - You don't go in the other direction,
09:49 which was it, Cleveland did the five cent beer night
09:52 or something and caused a riot.
09:53 - Oh, yes, yeah, yeah.
09:54 - They did a five cent beer night?
09:55 - In like the '80s or something like that.
09:57 - Five cent beer?
09:58 - And there was like literal riot, like a riot.
10:00 - They almost burned the stadium down.
10:02 - The stadium burned down, yeah.
10:03 - Unreal.
10:03 So like, you can't do that, it was 10 cent beer night.
10:05 - 10 cent beer night, yeah.
10:06 - 10 cent beer night, and what year was this, '74, okay.
10:08 So you can't--
10:09 - I remember being there, I was 20 in 1974.
10:11 (laughing)
10:12 I'm just kidding, I was three.
10:13 - What's the craziest thing you've ever done
10:14 when you've been drunk?
10:15 Large, I know you fought the guy in the bar
10:17 and he pulled a knife on you or something.
10:19 Who's the famous guy?
10:20 - Oh, that was Ray Bork.
10:21 - Ray Bork?
10:22 - Yeah, Ray Bork, I pulled a knife on him.
10:23 - You pulled a knife on him?
10:24 - I did. - Huh.
10:25 - Yeah, I got arrested in the seventh grade,
10:26 I assaulted an officer, obstructed traffic,
10:28 drunk and disorderly and perjury.
10:30 I was called denied in the 61st Precinct,
10:33 shout out to the 61st Precinct on Coney Island Avenue,
10:35 and so I kinda top ticked it, so it's great.
10:38 - You have a lot of officer assault employees here, huh?
10:41 There's more than--
10:42 - No, it wasn't so like,
10:43 that's exactly like a chaps type thing.
10:46 I was passed out when the guy had taken me,
10:48 so he spun me around, and I went like that,
10:51 and they put it on my JD card.
10:53 - Oh.
10:54 - I think I was 11 or 12 years old.
10:55 - What's a JD card?
10:56 - A juvenile delinquent.
10:57 - Please, God, tell me you still have it.
10:59 - No, so it's actually changed into a youth delinquent,
11:02 YD card, and it got expunged when I was 18.
11:05 - Damn. - Yeah.
11:06 - You haven't been in trouble with the law since?
11:07 - No, yeah, well--
11:08 - Not with the SCC.
11:09 - You've had close calls, I'm sure you've had close calls.
11:12 Maybe a pee on the train tracks,
11:13 maybe something like that.
11:15 - Usually it's more like zoning disputes.
11:16 - Ain't it a little mouthy?
11:17 - No, remember when I was under investigation
11:19 by the SCC when we were doing bar stunts?
11:20 - Oh yeah, we like celebrated that you weren't going to jail.
11:23 - It was a-- - My God, yeah.
11:23 - It was a Gentleman's Friday, we were,
11:27 I don't know, we were bombed and--
11:28 - You were guilty of sin, by the way.
11:29 - I got an email saying that I was exonerated
11:32 after the, hey!
11:33 - All right, cheers!
11:34 - Me, Willie, and Jet Ski, and Zah.
11:37 - Cousin producer.
11:38 - Cousin producer.
11:39 - I don't think Zah's ever been in trouble with the law.
11:40 - No, God, no. - Right?
11:41 - They'll kick his ass right back.
11:42 - I don't know.
11:43 Zah's been in plenty of trouble.
11:45 I mean, you put like three beers in him
11:47 and get him anywhere near his own Twitter accounts,
11:48 this is gonna happen. - Oh my gosh.
11:49 - But then he does this in the morning.
11:51 - Yeah, yeah, he does that one clip.
11:52 - All my days, all my days.
11:54 - One picture of him, he does it every single time.
11:57 - I called him as a lifeline on The Dozen,
12:01 because I got an Africa question,
12:03 and I called him, and it was like Saudi,
12:04 I called him, it was 2.15 in the morning,
12:06 he didn't pick up.
12:07 I wish he would've picked up in Zimbabwe, 2.30 in the morning.
12:09 - Oh, please don't tell me it was about dental care.
12:10 - Yeah.
12:11 - The biggest fight we ever got in on Barstool Breakfast
12:14 was like, I said something about dental care in Zimbabwe.
12:18 We don't have to get into that.
12:19 - No, no.
12:19 - It was a joke about how dental care would be
12:20 presumably bad in Zimbabwe, and he was very--
12:22 - We went down a rabbit hole.
12:24 - Yeah, you know what, let's move on.
12:25 - We'll say it over for a while.
12:26 - Okay with me, something else?
12:28 - We'll talk about it on Out and About.
12:29 - You all expect Jerry Seinfeld is calling
12:31 for a return of dominant masculinity.
12:33 - Yeah, brother.
12:33 - In his sit down with the free press,
12:34 he reminisced about growing up and wanting to be a real man.
12:36 He said, "I really thought that when I was in that era,
12:38 "it was JFK, Muhammad Ali, Sean Connery,
12:41 "Howard Carsell," and you can go all the way down from there.
12:43 He went on to say that he misses the dominant masculinity,
12:45 he likes a real man.
12:46 The one quote I had seen was that he looks up to Hugh Grant,
12:49 I believe, or he was like, "I like Hugh Grant."
12:51 He knows how to talk to a woman and stuff like that.
12:54 The two guys I want relationship advice from,
12:56 Hugh Grant and Jerry Seinfeld.
12:58 They're dating a 19 year old or potentially much worse.
13:01 - Who was dating a 19 year old?
13:02 - Jerry Seinfeld, he did that in high school.
13:04 - 17. - Shoshanna Lowenstein?
13:05 - 17.
13:06 - You would, if there's one guy in the world
13:08 who would know the name, it's you.
13:09 - You know her fucking name?
13:10 - Shoshanna Lowenstein? - Shoshanna.
13:12 - Put her up, she's got gigantic cans.
13:14 - She's like 40 years old.
13:15 - No, no, it's okay to say,
13:16 I guess there's a moderately old age.
13:18 - She's 23 now.
13:19 - I met her when she was like 16 or something
13:21 and courted her and then didn't officially start dating.
13:24 - That's like the rock stars who assume guardianship
13:26 over people. - Yeah.
13:27 - Try to give me a full body shot.
13:29 - Oh, you know who she looks like a little bit?
13:31 Our good friend Lisa Ann.
13:32 - Yeah, she does, but look at the cans.
13:35 Yeah, but when she-- - Was she a playmate?
13:36 - No, you know Hugh Grant, obviously, right, Pat?
13:38 - A transgender prostitute?
13:40 - I don't know if it was transgender,
13:41 I think it was just a prostitute.
13:42 - Oh, okay.
13:43 - Look at Hugh Grant prostitutes are on, Rich.
13:44 Make sure we get this all in your--
13:45 - Is her name Destiny?
13:46 - God, you just know every woman.
13:48 - If I had to guess.
13:49 - No, it was Eddie Murphy with the transgender.
13:51 - This is when he was married to Elizabeth Hurley.
13:55 When he was married to Elizabeth Hurley.
13:55 - Divine, Divine Brown, yeah.
13:58 - He got caught with this prostitute.
14:00 - That was my drag name.
14:01 - Again, while married to Elizabeth Hurley,
14:02 one of the most attractive women alive.
14:04 - And like scientifically, her face is supposed to be
14:07 the Rosetta Stone for female beauty.
14:09 - What is it, Elizabeth Hurley?
14:10 - Yeah, Elizabeth Hurley.
14:11 - Remember her in the movie Bedazzled?
14:12 - Amazing picture.
14:13 - With Brendan Frazier back in the day?
14:16 - She plays the devil.
14:17 - She was awesome in that.
14:18 - Mrs. Kensington?
14:19 - Mrs. Kensington in Austin Powers, yeah.
14:21 - She is the ultimate.
14:22 - Do you think it's weird that Jerry Seinfeld
14:24 was giving instances of masculinity from his childhood
14:28 and it was JFK, I get it, keep the top down.
14:31 Muhammad Ali, Sean Connery.
14:33 - Disavow, any Kennedys, keep the top up.
14:36 Top racism.
14:37 - Correct, yes, exactly.
14:38 - What does that mean, top down?
14:39 - Because when he was going through Dallas,
14:41 he was like, why don't you take the top?
14:42 - Oh, okay.
14:42 - And he was in the U.S.
14:43 - He never said that.
14:44 But then the last one is Howard Cosell.
14:46 - Shout out to the CIA.
14:47 - Howard Cosell is his--
14:50 - Howie Cosell, yeah, that's a weird one.
14:50 - That's not a fucking Rushmore.
14:52 JFK, Muhammad Ali, Sean Connery, and Howard Cosell.
14:55 - Also, when he was growing up, people,
14:56 I would say the big bad men of his era,
14:59 they didn't like Muhammad Ali because they're like,
15:01 oh, he ducked Vietnam, he ducked Vietnam.
15:04 They didn't like him.
15:05 - I like this new Jerry Seinfeld.
15:06 Something happened with him,
15:08 I think it was a month or so ago I blogged,
15:10 that he had given some big interview
15:12 about how the left is ruining comedy.
15:14 And now every movie, everything he does,
15:17 he ends up just going on a tangent
15:18 about the libs and fucking masculinity and this and that.
15:22 And the best part is he does these interviews
15:24 from his $100 million compound in the Hamptons.
15:27 He's saying how terrible and tough it is to be a man
15:29 and he's sitting in this beautiful Sag Harbor house.
15:32 - I think his whole thing is like,
15:33 Jerry Seinfeld is not tough.
15:34 I would not be--
15:35 - He said that at the end of the interview.
15:37 And I've tried to be a man for many years, but I'm not.
15:39 But the pendulum always swings.
15:40 It was like late 20 teens, early 20s,
15:43 like this cultural castration of like,
15:46 it's so tough to be a guy, blah, blah, blah.
15:48 And then all that did,
15:50 everyone was afraid to say what they think
15:52 or be who they are,
15:53 all that did was now make the pendulum swing
15:55 that much harder to the right.
15:56 So it's everything swings eventually.
15:59 And I think Jerry Seinfeld is the final push,
16:01 swinging it over.
16:02 If Seinfeld is talking about it, then you know.
16:04 - Have you seen those clips of guys in masculinity camps?
16:07 Where like-- - Oh my God.
16:08 - So funny.
16:08 - It's like Navy SEAL boot camp.
16:11 - Yeah, and they're like,
16:12 "We just want you to sit by a waterfall
16:13 "and scream as loud as you can."
16:14 It's like, "What is this?"
16:15 - He got Joey a, for the Secret Santa,
16:18 a gift card to go do that.
16:19 - Go do it.
16:20 - Yeah.
16:21 - I helped a friend move years ago
16:22 and in a box had fallen out a couple of VCR tapes.
16:25 And one of them was how to make love to a woman.
16:28 And for some reason he said, I said, "Holy shit, what is it?"
16:31 He's like, "My wife, it got it for me."
16:32 - Oh no. - Could there be
16:33 a worse situation?
16:35 I'm dying to say his name right now.
16:37 - Say it.
16:38 - No, I can't.
16:39 - Was it Al from Dallas?
16:40 - Willie Colon.
16:41 - Al from Dallas.
16:41 - I don't know that.
16:42 - No.
16:43 - That is brutal.
16:44 - Yeah.
16:45 - People have started filming in Chipotle employees
16:47 in order to get bigger portions of food.
16:48 - How to make love to a woman.
16:49 - Amazing video.
16:50 I would love to watch that video, by the way.
16:52 Not the video of the Chipotle guy,
16:53 but the video of how to make love to a woman.
16:54 - Oh yeah.
16:55 - There has to be something in there.
16:56 We don't know all the secrets.
16:57 - I'm all set.
16:57 - This is like an ancient text.
16:59 But yeah, people have been, social media have been coming
17:03 in Chipotle so hard for not giving the customers enough food
17:05 or bigger enough portions.
17:06 So they said corporate, at least at Chipotle,
17:09 sent a memo telling employees to fill them up
17:11 whenever they see someone has their phone out.
17:13 Customers found out about the memo
17:14 and they've been filming Chipotle employees
17:15 every time they order to make sure they get fair
17:17 or just large portions of food.
17:18 And in the video, that dude gets a massive portion of food.
17:22 So I kinda, I think it's real.
17:24 I think it's real.
17:24 I wouldn't do it, but I think it's real.
17:25 - Why wouldn't you do it?
17:26 I'm curious whether or not I would do it.
17:28 - I don't like filming people.
17:29 I feel like it's like that, like not us anyway,
17:31 but like I wouldn't walk up to someone in the street
17:33 or like a rando and just start filming them
17:34 without their consent.
17:35 - It doesn't, it doesn't it kind of infuriate,
17:37 and I'm asking you both,
17:38 doesn't it kind of infuriate you that a corporate office
17:42 said only give them a decent amount of food when you're,
17:46 like that would infuriate me
17:47 if the little fucking idiot in front of me is filming
17:50 and gets loaded up and I decide to be decent and I don't.
17:53 - Wait, no, bring that with you.
17:54 Bring that with you.
17:55 Bring that with you.
17:56 - It's not the,
17:57 - Bring it with you.
17:58 - We don't want you.
17:59 - No, he has Chipotle.
18:00 - Yeah, yeah.
18:01 - Hey, so.
18:02 - Oh, look what this guy just did.
18:04 - So now they're going overboard.
18:05 This is a problem with Chipotle, it's not.
18:06 You're coming back with Chipotle right now, right?
18:09 - Yes.
18:11 - Did you film them doing it to get a bigger portion?
18:13 - No, I think that big Chipotle is in on this
18:16 to try to get people to go to Chipotle.
18:18 - Doing that.
18:19 - To do that.
18:20 - Excellent point.
18:20 - So now people are doing that.
18:21 - Oh, what a point, Nate.
18:22 - Just stock only going up.
18:23 - Yeah.
18:24 - Oh, okay.
18:25 All right, fair enough.
18:26 - I'm woke.
18:27 - But I've never seen a company go like this
18:30 outside of like meme stocks
18:31 while the stock is going like that.
18:32 Like everyone is saying like,
18:34 "Oh, Kava is still good, Chipotle sucks."
18:37 And yet the fucking stock will not stop skyrocketing.
18:39 - Yeah.
18:40 - If the problem is just like the balancing of proportions,
18:42 you'll either get just a huge serving of rice
18:44 and then like a minuscule amount of everything else,
18:46 or it's all over the place.
18:47 But if I'm working at Chipotle
18:49 and I find out that my corporate office has done this,
18:51 I'm just quitting.
18:52 - Look at that fucking chart.
18:54 - Yeah, it's skyrocketing.
18:55 - It's showing up right now.
18:55 - What is that?
18:56 - That's Chipotle.
18:58 - What is that 3,000?
18:59 - That's the, oh, that's the stock price.
19:01 - Yeah.
19:02 - Chipotle is $3,000 a share.
19:03 - What?
19:04 - Yeah, they're about to do this big reverse split.
19:06 So everyone, excuse me,
19:07 - It'll go down.
19:08 - A split, a multiple splatter.
19:09 I forget what the terms are, but they're doing it.
19:11 - Chipotle is $3,000 a share?
19:13 - Yeah.
19:14 - It's like fucking Berkshire Hathaway or something.
19:15 - Yeah, it's like Berkree.
19:16 - How?
19:17 How much is the Berkshire Hathaway A stock right now,
19:19 you think?
19:19 300 grand is my guess per share.
19:22 - John, put a Berk A, BRK A.
19:23 - 145,000.
19:25 - $616,000 a share.
19:27 - Yeah, it's up $7,000 today, which is 1%.
19:31 - Can you explain what that,
19:33 why the stock is so expensive?
19:35 - So normally,
19:36 - What the split means?
19:37 - So normally what stocks do,
19:39 should we be doing this on the run then?
19:40 - Do it a quick one.
19:41 - Yeah, so normally what stocks do is
19:42 as they start growing in stock price,
19:45 they'll see that people are less inclined to buy,
19:48 retail investors are less inclined to buy
19:50 more expensive issues,
19:51 just because they think that they're outpriced.
19:53 So they'll do stock splits.
19:54 So if you own a thousand shares of Chipotle,
19:59 and they do a two for one stock split,
20:01 you now own 2000 shares of Chipotle,
20:03 but at half the price.
20:04 So it doesn't change your full position, right?
20:07 You still have the same cash position,
20:09 but it just makes the stock easier for people to trade.
20:11 - And it's not inflated like that
20:13 just because it's like memed, essentially?
20:15 - No, no, no.
20:16 No, it's not one of these meme stocks at all.
20:18 - That's wild.
20:19 - Yeah, yeah.
20:20 So,
20:21 - So you learned something today.
20:23 2024 Darts Masters this weekend at Madison Square Garden,
20:25 there will be a massive barstool contingent there.
20:28 I think last year we had like something like 150 people there
20:31 some crazy number.
20:32 This year, probably not as many
20:33 without the people in Chicago,
20:34 but we'll have a ton of people there as well.
20:36 It'll be out in the Hulu Theater at MSG.
20:38 17 year old darts prodigy, Luke Littler.
20:41 - Luke the new Littler, yeah.
20:45 - Will be competing, he was in the office today
20:46 with his girlfriend who obviously was very heavily
20:48 blogged about, written about even here.
20:50 It was,
20:52 - It's just a fact.
20:54 - It's a, we do an annual darts day there every year.
20:55 This guy, he just won like what, 300 grand?
20:57 - He won 300 grand by winning the Premier League last week.
21:02 He lost in the finals of the World Championship.
21:04 The guy he lost to, he then beat in the Premier League.
21:06 He's ranked 26th in the world,
21:09 only because he's only been professional for six months.
21:12 - Yeah.
21:13 - So it's not, it's skewed.
21:14 Like even what he won last week
21:15 is not factored into his ranking yet.
21:17 - Gotcha.
21:18 - But he's definitely one of the top,
21:19 would you say five, five players in the world?
21:21 - Him, MVG and the other Welsh guy that's like really good.
21:25 There's like three or four Welsh guys
21:26 that are at the top of the list.
21:27 It kind of has a Ryder Cup feel
21:29 because they bring these guys over from the UK
21:31 and the first day they play, US and Canadian guys.
21:34 But he says there's only one or two real threats
21:37 over on this side of the pond,
21:39 but otherwise all this, and very soft-spoken guy.
21:42 I just had him in for an interview,
21:44 but yeah, like he's racking up the dough at 17.
21:48 - He's a literal child.
21:49 - He's a little, yeah.
21:50 - They gave him a magnetic dart board
21:51 when he was four years old.
21:53 - Yeah.
21:53 - You know, throwing it at magnets when he was four
21:55 and he was just very good at it.
21:56 So once he turned 11, his parents had got him one with tips
22:00 and then his dad's like, he's been, you know,
22:04 by the time he was 12, he was better than his dad.
22:06 And now he just turned 17 in January.
22:10 So he still hasn't had a beer yet.
22:12 - He can have it in one year.
22:14 - He turns 18 and that's when it's legal over there.
22:17 So yeah.
22:17 - Yeah, but I saw him blowing lines in the game.
22:19 [laughing]
22:20 - Huge, gotta get an edge.
22:21 - He's popping GHB right behind his head.
22:22 Parody, not real.
22:23 - Must have that edge.
22:24 - My shirt last year said, of course I come fast,
22:26 I have darts to watch.
22:27 It's a big picture of Michael Van Gurren right on the side.
22:30 It's just the darts world.
22:31 - You won't see us as a group
22:34 since they stopped Gentlemen's Friday.
22:36 - Yeah.
22:37 - You will not see a group of Barstool employees more drunk.
22:40 - I was so fucking ripped.
22:41 - Than you do at the darts.
22:42 I, you know, I try to go to most of the stuff.
22:44 - Are you going?
22:45 - Yeah, I'll be there.
22:46 - Oh, nice.
22:47 - Last time Chuck was telling me,
22:48 'cause I don't even remember,
22:48 I just remember I went home after like 20 minutes
22:50 'cause I was so blitzed.
22:51 And they're like, I just saw you walk in
22:53 and you already had Seamless up on your phone,
22:54 ordering to go back home.
22:55 And you already had 20 items from Taco Bell in your cart.
22:58 After Showtime, Dave versus Nate in poker,
23:02 challenge was issued over at the unnamed show.
23:06 I think, believe that they offered 20K heads up game,
23:09 Nate versus Dave.
23:10 I think it'll depend just in my head, right?
23:14 'Cause poker is like so much a skill game.
23:15 I think Nate would kill Dave in poker,
23:18 but it's one of those things where it's,
23:19 like they were telling me, like variance is everything.
23:22 - Yeah, so my 20K to Dave's 20K heads up.
23:27 Yeah, I have every advantage over him.
23:31 The money doesn't really matter.
23:34 I mean, 20K is a lot more to me than it is to him.
23:36 I'm not saying it doesn't matter,
23:37 but that won't affect my game
23:39 because I should be just much better than him.
23:41 But as you said, the variance of it,
23:43 like anybody can win at any time playing poker.
23:45 He's so overly confident though.
23:48 Like he thinks he can win a 250K,
23:50 which is like at the WSOP, the highest buy-in,
23:52 where it's just all stone-
23:53 - People are very good.
23:54 - Like it's all stone cold killers
23:55 and their only edge is like guys like him showing up,
23:58 thinking that they can play
23:59 and they just get run the fuck over.
24:01 - Don't you think him not caring about losing 20K
24:04 will affect the way that he plays?
24:05 - Might not play logically.
24:06 - And that'll lodge him an edge over you?
24:07 - No, because he's so headstrong that like,
24:12 if the money, if 250K doesn't matter, 20K doesn't matter,
24:14 no money matters to him,
24:15 he won't change how he plays regardless.
24:17 - But you'll, but I feel like that-
24:18 - I won't either.
24:19 - I won't make you change,
24:20 you putting up $20,000
24:21 would definitely change the way you play
24:22 if you put up five, right?
24:23 - No, disagree.
24:24 Not against Dave, not against Dave, no.
24:26 - I think Dave is so intelligent and handsome.
24:29 - Here we go.
24:30 - You already signed your contract.
24:31 - I love, I think-
24:31 - You already signed, you already signed.
24:32 - He's the best.
24:33 - Dave, will you slow play it?
24:34 Like is there something where you'll kind of
24:36 ham and egg it for a while
24:37 and not big stack bully him or anything like that?
24:40 - Yeah, you just, I mean, yeah,
24:41 there's a feeling out process.
24:43 He will, his goal is to embarrass me, right?
24:46 Like that's his only goal.
24:48 Maybe on the planet, maybe he's like his only goal
24:50 like for now on is to embarrass me.
24:52 - You think you're smarter than Dave?
24:54 - No.
24:54 - Oh, if Dave wins.
24:56 - Yeah.
24:57 - Like that Teddy Cage beat, last time I stick it.
24:59 - Yeah.
24:59 - He made me my money.
25:01 - Yeah.
25:02 - I do think the more interesting thing
25:04 is him thinking he can win the 250K buy-in,
25:07 which is crazy.
25:08 Like I compared it to him hitting a home run
25:12 off of like Randy Johnson and his prime.
25:14 Like you can close your eyes and hit a home run.
25:16 It's just highly, highly, highly unlikely.
25:18 - There's also just so many like little things
25:19 like skill-wise with poker,
25:20 which I feel like you and Smitty know,
25:22 like and Mince know like all down pat.
25:24 Like he would know not having played like poker at that.
25:26 - Yeah, he hasn't played since like 2005.
25:28 - Did he play like legit, legit or?
25:30 - He played low stakes like way back in the day.
25:32 - Okay.
25:33 - The game has changed so much since then.
25:34 - How does poker change?
25:35 - But why does it change?
25:36 Because like the Tom Duans and stuff?
25:38 - The players are so good now.
25:40 There's something called solvers,
25:41 which is basically like the game is solved more or less.
25:44 And you can study these solvers for hours on end.
25:47 - And the online game has changed it too
25:49 because these guys get more reps.
25:50 - It's so tough, man.
25:51 It's a very, very, very hard game.
25:54 And the guys who are the best are so fucking good.
25:57 It's like a play on such a different level.
25:59 - Like Tomos and Nagranos.
26:00 - No, he stinks, but.
26:01 - Nagranu?
26:02 - No, Nagranu's great.
26:03 Phil is whatever.
26:04 - Is Mince better than you?
26:05 - Mince, maybe.
26:09 I don't know.
26:09 We're probably pretty close.
26:10 He has better results than me for sure.
26:12 - Yeah, I thought for sure that guy was just like,
26:14 oh, no question in my mind,
26:15 like you or Smitty would be like destroy anyone here
26:17 for the most part other than Mincey.
26:18 But if Portnoy has played before,
26:20 I didn't realize he was like--
26:21 - Everybody here has played.
26:21 - Yeah, but like not like at a professional
26:23 or like even semi-pro level.
26:24 - Look, there's this guy, he's actually dead now,
26:26 RIP Darvin Moon.
26:27 He finished second in the main event,
26:30 I don't know, a decade ago.
26:31 He was just a logger from like rural Maryland.
26:33 And he got in Queens versus Kings.
26:36 He had Queens and he flops a queen,
26:38 gets his huge chip lead on like day five
26:40 and he goes to the final table.
26:41 Anybody can win or final table a poker tournament.
26:44 It's just like Dave can't against this 250K buy in field.
26:48 - Those are really good players.
26:50 All right, I'll be looking forward to that.
26:50 I would love to watch.
26:51 - I don't know if he's gonna do it.
26:52 He's been trying to play me or saying he'll play me
26:54 for 10 years now.
26:55 He keeps dodging me, ducking me.
26:56 So we'll see.
26:57 - Love to watch it.
26:58 I'd also love to see if they were to do a tournament
27:00 where it'd be Dave versus Nate and Smitty and Mincey,
27:03 just to watch them all kind of turn on each other.
27:05 I think that would be kind of cool.
27:05 - They play strip poker?
27:07 - Strip poker, oh God.
27:08 - If we did like a more of a like content wide tournament,
27:11 I'd be down for that.
27:13 - We did a few of them digitally over COVID.
27:14 They're really fun.
27:16 Playing with some other guys.
27:16 - I didn't get the invite, whatever.
27:18 - Jake Malicek and his disgusting butt.
27:21 This is from the episode of the Bracket yesterday.
27:22 I still can't believe this.
27:24 So let me ask you, this is a question.
27:25 You know Jake Malicek.
27:26 - I do, yeah, I like him.
27:27 - On the Bracket yesterday, he had admission to us.
27:31 It's too long, I think of a full clip to play here.
27:33 - I had a question.
27:34 You guys shower in the mornings?
27:36 - Yeah.
27:36 - Have you guys ever taken a shit
27:38 and then not even like wiped at all
27:39 and just gotten in the shower?
27:40 - No. - Nope.
27:41 - No, no.
27:42 - Do that all the time.
27:43 - Jesus, disgusting.
27:44 - All the time.
27:44 - That's gross.
27:45 - That is my bidet.
27:46 I love doing that shit.
27:48 - What do you mean?
27:49 Where's your ass?
27:50 - You get in there and you just clean your ass
27:53 in the shower.
27:53 It's two birds, one stone.
27:54 - You bend down?
27:55 You bend over and--
27:56 - You notoriously don't use soap.
27:57 - Yeah, no, I just, I'm--
27:58 - Just water.
28:00 - That's what I do.
28:00 - No soap?
28:01 - He doesn't use soap.
28:02 - I'm not a body wash guy.
28:03 I refuse to use body wash.
28:04 - Well, no, you use a bar of soap though, right?
28:05 - No.
28:06 - No, no, no, nothing on my body.
28:07 I hate it.
28:08 I hate using it.
28:10 - You just have shit all over you then.
28:12 - No, I mean, the water cleans me.
28:13 The water cleans me,
28:14 but I think that that is one of nature's great pleasures
28:17 is taking a poop in the morning.
28:18 - Whoa, whoa, whoa.
28:19 - Right in the shower.
28:20 - How do you clean your ass in the shower?
28:22 - It's the water is flowing through your butt and you--
28:24 - When through your butt?
28:25 - But you use your hands on your butt
28:26 and you don't use soap?
28:27 - It's--
28:28 - You wipe it with your hand with no soap.
28:31 - Yeah.
28:32 - Oh.
28:32 - Wait, what?
28:33 - What?
28:34 - I need you guys to try this at some point.
28:36 - No!
28:37 - It's not bad.
28:38 - No, no, no.
28:38 (laughing)
28:39 - You rub your hand in between your ass.
28:41 - Yeah, all the time.
28:42 You guys don't?
28:43 - I'm cleaning my ass, but I have soap on my hands.
28:45 - You just cover yourself,
28:46 hands and lower body, all that, with poop,
28:48 and then you don't wash it off with soap?
28:50 - No, I'm in the shower.
28:52 It's cleaning me at the same time.
28:54 - Oh, there is no direct spray
28:56 from the shower head to your anus.
28:57 - Yes, there is.
28:58 It comes down and your back is to the shower head.
29:02 It's hitting you in the crack,
29:04 and then the poop is gone.
29:05 - No, it's not.
29:06 - Where does the poop go?
29:07 - It goes down the drill.
29:08 - Where does the poop on your hands go?
29:09 'Cause do you wash your hands after at least?
29:11 - Yeah, I'm in the shower.
29:13 I'm fully immersed in the shower.
29:14 - But there's no soap!
29:14 - There's no soap!
29:15 - I'm in the shower.
29:16 - You don't use soap?
29:17 (laughing)
29:18 - The soap doesn't clean me.
29:19 - When you're done going to the bathroom
29:21 and not even a shower,
29:21 you wash your hands, are you using soap then?
29:24 - No.
29:25 - Jesus fucking Christ!
29:25 (laughing)
29:26 - I don't know.
29:27 - Come on!
29:28 - You are enveloped in a film of fecal matter.
29:31 - You might have more shit on your body
29:33 than any person in America.
29:34 (laughing)
29:36 - Covered in poop.
29:37 - Basically he said, what he does is that
29:39 he'll take a poop in the morning
29:40 and then he'll go straight into the shower
29:42 without wiping or anything.
29:43 He's like, yeah, you guys all do that, right?
29:44 And we're all like, no, no one does that.
29:46 That's disgusting.
29:47 And he goes, okay, well that's whatever,
29:49 but I also don't use soap.
29:50 So he never uses soap ever, period, at all.
29:53 He's like, I don't like how it feels on me.
29:55 Don't wear soap, don't use soap.
29:56 So he takes, he poops, he claws out his butthole
30:00 with his bare hands and does not use soap at any point.
30:03 And it is one of the most,
30:04 we gave him a million ways to get out of this conversation
30:06 and every single time he doubled down.
30:08 - I will tell you now, Jake went to Virginia, didn't he?
30:11 - He did.
30:12 - Yeah, 'cause we were up against him.
30:13 Spider and I had like a bracket buster.
30:15 It broke the kid's heart.
30:16 But very, very nice kid.
30:18 I will tell you, as a guy who's close to death,
30:20 when I used to wipe my ass as a kid,
30:22 it was like a silk scarf between two bowling balls.
30:24 And now it's like cleaning cake batter
30:26 out of a catcher's mitt.
30:27 Perhaps he just has so much, you know what it is.
30:31 But so perhaps he has just a high fiber diet
30:33 where it does, do we know?
30:35 'Cause Jake seems like he's--
30:36 - I mean the hair, he doesn't look like a hairy guy.
30:38 - No, he did mention he has a hairy butt.
30:39 - Oh, he has a, oh God, yeah.
30:41 - So it's just like dingleberry world down there.
30:43 He's like--
30:44 - I didn't see any hair when I was down there.
30:45 - I think KB said he is enveloped in a film of fecal matter
30:48 at any given moment, which is true.
30:50 - I tried, Jake, I tried.
30:52 - Jake Malzick is a disgusting person.
30:54 - Gross.
30:55 - Who needs to be put down like Old Yeller.
30:57 - Like a sick dog.
30:58 - He's a pig.
30:59 - Frank walks with Brian Gumgarner,
31:01 office Kevin, he spilled chili.
31:02 - Now I'm thinking about both their asses too.
31:04 - Both their asses.
31:05 - Not having a good time at all with this fucking episode.
31:07 - I can't even imagine what that looks like.
31:08 Frank walks with Brian Gumgarner,
31:10 obviously go check that out.
31:11 He threw out the first pitch today at the Brewers game.
31:13 - Yeah.
31:14 - All of us bet, and this is still an active bet,
31:17 I wonder how the score is.
31:18 Check the score of the Cubs game real quick.
31:19 We all bet your feet, yes, run first inning on the Cubs
31:22 because Frank was throwing out the first pitch
31:24 for the Brewers, that hit.
31:27 So we, but we parlayed it with Cubs winning
31:29 and they're now down by two as of right now,
31:31 top of the fourth inning.
31:32 So we'll see.
31:33 - Did we see, I think Frank's thrown out before, hasn't he?
31:37 - I think at like minor league games,
31:38 I don't know if he's at a major league game.
31:39 - Is there a video of his pitch?
31:40 - Do you think he's got a BB or did, what'd he do?
31:43 - I'm not sure how it works.
31:43 - With this new body, he hasn't,
31:44 I don't think he's thrown out a pitch since he's gotten,
31:47 let's see, oh here it comes.
31:47 - There he is.
31:49 Wow, I love Frank.
31:50 - Fucking frozen rope.
31:51 - Oh, that's not bad.
31:54 - Pretty good.
31:55 - That's impressive.
31:56 - That's pretty good.
31:56 - First try?
31:57 - Yeah.
31:58 - That guy like pretty--
31:59 - Yeah, he's full of, I mean this guy,
32:00 A-janks saved his life.
32:02 - Yeah, yeah.
32:03 - I mean, Frank would be the first to not tell you,
32:05 but yeah.
32:06 - Frank deserved the janks though.
32:08 - Oh, 100%.
32:08 - Frank deserved A-janks?
32:09 - Yeah.
32:10 - I mean--
32:11 - Frank.
32:12 - That's awesome, man.
32:13 - He looks so much better compared to like even a year ago.
32:14 It's crazy.
32:15 - Oh man, he looks wonderful.
32:16 - That's great he lost.
32:16 - So do I.
32:17 - Is Tank gonna be on Surviving Barcel?
32:18 - Yeah, I believe so.
32:19 - Oh.
32:20 - Good to know.
32:21 That's gonna be a very interesting--
32:21 - Yeah, I'll tell you what would be a nice rank
32:23 if they bring Jake Malasek on.
32:26 - Yeah.
32:26 - And I'm gonna be like, you know, bunking next to him.
32:27 - You're bunking next to him?
32:28 - Yeah.
32:29 - Any given time, you're just covered in poop.
32:31 - Yeah.
32:32 - Man, hey, if anyone wants to help a guy pay for his wedding
32:33 get me on Surviving Barstool.
32:35 I'd be out the first week, but I mean,
32:36 if I get any second, third, 15th place money,
32:39 that'd be great.
32:40 Probably more likely Pat or Joey gets in, but--
32:42 - Correct.
32:43 - Yeah, I hope that happens.
32:44 He said we're a maybe, we'll see.
32:46 - You're a maybe right now?
32:47 - We're a maybe.
32:48 Well, I'm a go, it's up to Dave, so.
32:50 - Yeah, oh, you're a go, okay.
32:51 - I'm a no.
32:52 - Anything else you guys got?
32:54 - Nope.
32:55 - That's it, darts this weekend, yeah.
32:56 - That's it, check out darts,
32:57 check out Frank Walks Bryant Dump Garner,
32:58 check out that episode of The Bracket,
32:59 then you got--
33:00 - Oh, new Twisted History, Twisted History of Horses.
33:02 Average stallion penis, 18 to 24 inches long.
33:04 - Oh, wow.
33:05 - Average stallion ejaculate is almost two cups.
33:08 - That's a lot.
33:08 - Enjoy your day.
33:09 (whooshing)
33:12 [BLANK_AUDIO]