- yesterday
Nicky Smokes | Viva TV
Category
🥇
SportsTranscript
00:00I think it's the worst sport going.
00:25It is?
00:25That probably had the worst ratings of all time.
00:28For a game seven.
00:30I didn't want you a second.
00:31A foul, a turnover.
00:33This is all they do.
00:35You should get teed up for that.
00:37Or that should be a timeout.
00:39Or something has to happen with that.
00:41No?
00:41Bring it up to the commissioner.
00:44That guy looked half dead in the fucking stands yesterday.
00:47That might be like a Biden show.
00:48Jerry, I've said this for years.
00:51I think he's a vampire.
00:52It's a corny leak.
00:53Everything's corny.
00:54It's all performative.
00:56It's all for show.
00:57None of the stuff after felt genuine.
00:59Like I watch the clips.
01:00None of it ever feels genuine.
01:02He might also be the worst MVP of all time.
01:05SGA?
01:06No.
01:07No?
01:07What?
01:08I'm just asking.
01:09I don't watch basketball.
01:10I know.
01:11He does the same move every time.
01:13Works.
01:14Yeah, he gets fouled.
01:15You're not a basketball guy.
01:18I said that on camera.
01:19Neither of you guys are.
01:20Hey, no basketball stream ever.
01:23You wouldn't show up anyway if you'd be fucking golfing with your foreplay boys.
01:27What are you talking about?
01:28Football.
01:28Yes.
01:29Basketball, never again.
01:31We literally didn't do one.
01:32I know.
01:32That's good.
01:33So, you're saying never to something we didn't do.
01:35We did it last year.
01:37Why did we do it last year?
01:38Because it was better.
01:39We need football.
01:40We hate that.
01:40We hate the association.
01:42Yeah.
01:42You watched basketball last night?
01:44I just let you know.
01:45Worst sport gone, right?
01:47The NBA.
01:48Yeah.
01:49Another one.
01:50I found out yesterday it was still on.
01:52I couldn't believe it.
01:53See?
01:54It's July 4th.
01:56It's June 23rd.
01:58We hate basically July.
02:01We hate basketball.
02:03The guy does this.
02:05He goes like that and then he goes like this and then he steps back to juice.
02:08That's his move every time.
02:09That was good.
02:10Yeah, that's what he does.
02:11He backs down.
02:11I don't care.
02:13You guys can hate it.
02:14I don't like it.
02:14You can hate it.
02:16I don't give a fuck.
02:18You're not going to convince me that it's bad and I should watch it.
02:21No.
02:21Just like I'm not going to convince you that it's good and you should watch it.
02:25Like you have your, you do your thing, I do mine.
02:28You don't, you don't like any sport other than the NFL.
02:32So I don't really count yours.
02:35You have C a little bit.
02:36You have C.
02:37And this guy says he's the number one ball watcher and doesn't watch half the sports.
02:41That's untrue.
02:43Take him away.
02:44You, you, I, you are just dumb.
02:47Watch, I train you?
02:48Oh, yeah.
02:48I mean, you just, you like on Saturday night, you just send the most outlandish text message.
02:52What did I say?
02:53I'm going to kill you one day.
02:56Let's do it.
02:56I wasn't in the right, I wasn't in the right state of mind that night.
02:59I told you that.
03:00Why did you say that?
03:01Because I was, I got slammed in Call of Duty and I just took it out on you.
03:05I, whatever.
03:07He's going to kill you one day.
03:08I, I, that's the, I, I, I'm going to do it.
03:10I 100% believe that.
03:12Like, I, one day will just like walk outside out of my apartment.
03:16They'll just be like a dark figure.
03:18Just like walking up on me.
03:19Good.
03:20Hey, can you show me how to, I want, I want, I don't want no calories in it.
03:24Can you do it or no?
03:25Dan, what do I do for like a good, like a flavor, but no, no calories.
03:29Black coffee.
03:31I need something in it though.
03:33Like for flavor.
03:34I had milk.
03:36No calories.
03:37No calories.
03:38We don't have like a, oh, see this is what I was looking for.
03:42Whoopi.
03:44What's the calories in this?
03:48Table speed.
03:48Oh, God, I just want to say thank you from the bottom of my heart, because before this
04:06last year, I was easily known by Dave and everyone as the dumbest person at motor school.
04:12But now I wouldn't say you're dumber.
04:15I just say we're in it together.
04:16And there's the problem with a guy like Nicky, Dan said it, is when somebody has no functioning
04:21brain cells at all, like zero, none, at what point you keep getting mad.
04:27It's like, well, he's so, he's the stupidest person we've ever encountered.
04:30He's the stupidest person we've ever had.
04:36So I'm not saying you're dumber.
04:37I'm just saying we're in it together.
04:37But it's been nice this year to have someone take the heat off that.
04:41Stupid boys stay hot.
04:43Whatever, we're still employed, baby.
04:47Oh, here's our third triplet.
04:48He's in the group.
04:49What are you doing?
04:50That's a big three right there of people that would test positive for autism.
04:55I think if me, you and Dave took an IQ test together, the combined score would be like 56.
05:01He's like dumb, dumber, and dumbest.
05:03Yeah, that works too.
05:05bad stupid boys stay hot whatever we're still employed baby oh here's our third triplet
05:13he's in the group that's a big three right there of uh people that would test positive for autism
05:19i think it'd be me you and dave took an iq test together the combined score would be like
05:2556 like dumb dumber and dumbest yeah that works too yeah but also let's make sure it's dumb dumb
05:32and dumbest you like that as long as we're still avoiding you know yeah i mean easy for you to say
05:40not really but okay like i know i'm dumb but like i do dumb on purpose because like i know it makes
05:49for good content he just does dumb because he's dumb which ends up being good content so maybe
05:54we are one in the same but he's like yo i got this genius idea for viva tv i'm gonna have a camera
06:00come up that's what he came up with what am i supposed to do with that like i don't want to
06:05break his heart and be like yo that was kind of dumb because it was but we're both dumb and when
06:11you put dumb and dumb together you get genius maybe we should start a show together are you
06:18i think you could leave that in there myself and some of the beach cast members
06:23had a impromptu family dinner they were not acting like family though we really got to see a different
06:30side to some of those people last night for better or worse i honestly think like katik is the biggest
06:39yeah but you're saying like star like i'm genuinely worried he's gonna get arrested you gotta understand
06:44you got the big bull in the china shop hey watch out excuse me
07:03how's your night last night good dude the beach house crew rocks man it's gonna be a blast i took
07:10my pants off for some reason okay you wanted to know what happened last night yeah i saw some
07:17really out of context text in that group chat me and tommy are like looking at each other and like
07:22katik is just he's unhinged but to the point where like i don't know if it's gonna be a problem
07:28feasting on that bone like that was scary like it wasn't he was doing it with no one watching his pants
07:35were down why was that i honestly think he just took them off that's what i was afraid of i was
07:41very surprised by how well ella and anika got along i think they like that you don't like that well i
07:48don't like it for like the show for like for my personal life that's great like them two big friends
07:53is good for me jackie was an angel right nothing to report there lucky jackie's gonna have a good
08:01summer what does that mean i could just tell she's gonna have a good summer i don't know you know
08:06you just like go out with someone you're like they're a good vibe and i'm gonna ask the question
08:10again jackie was an angel nothing crazy last night oh yes yes what angel okay okay yes yes i see what
08:16you're saying anything else from dante you guys were on his side of the table most oh how about he irish
08:21goodbye that was up yeah i have multiple bones to pay with him once they started talking about sex
08:28the whole place blew up dante screaming at the top of his lungs that blowjobs don't count as a body
08:34crazy going crazy like there was no flow at that table until they started talking about
08:42which is why i am very like nervous and excited for them this summer like here's it like i feel like me
08:47and tommy you guys are probably we're like mature professional after after last night and i thought this
08:54before definitely like the most normal yeah and jackie um give me like let's act like we're on the
09:00act like let me hear let me hear your facts i'm gonna i'm gonna basically say that katex pr took quite
09:06the turn last night okay good i'm gonna say he made that video saying that he's just gonna chill
09:13vibe and drink had us thinking he was gonna be like his and uncle buck no it's more like a don veto yes
09:19yes and then that will eventually slide into his wardrobe purposeful wardrobe malfunction yes and
09:28then um i think that'll be it for now also almost positive they'll bring him on what was the pants
09:35off i honestly don't remember pulling my pants down okay but i just another thing i do when i'm drunk is
09:42i just take off all my clothes okay i got bars like i mean which way does this go oh my god
09:54holy man oh i'll be sweating so much
10:02hey can you help me get this uh the heel on there we go
10:06yeah okay yeah i'm already sweating so bad bro it's broken what no no you're good no you're good
10:22okay we're gonna do that one more time holy shit dude i'm freaking out of here
10:30dude i gotta get my arms out of here
10:31dude i gotta get my arms out of here oh oh holy shit
10:40ooh okay okay
10:45come on motherfucker
10:50where's that hat oh
10:52oh
11:10good yeah
11:20Dude, I can't get in that thing again.
11:26That was brutal.
11:27That thing's a fucking sauna in there.
11:30Hi, I'm Brandon Walker.
11:32Yes, the Brandon Walker.
11:34A lot of people know me from all my shows at Barstool Sports,
11:36but frankly, over the last few years,
11:39most people know me by my incredible head of hair.
11:42Look at it.
11:42I used to look like I cut my hair with a knife and fork,
11:45but now, wave on wave on wave.
11:48You want to look like this?
11:49How about the number one selling men's hair growth supplement on the market
11:52in the world?
11:54Nutrafol.
11:55Check out Nutrafol.
11:5684% of men in a clinical trial saw improvement in their hair after using Nutrafol.
12:00It is that good.
12:02You want hair growth results you can trust?
12:04Nutrafol.
12:04N-U-T-R-A-F-O-L dot com.
12:08Nutrafol.com.
12:09What I'm giving you right now,
12:10$10 off your first month subscription and free shipping when you go to Nutrafol.com.
12:14And I want you to enter the promo code VIVA.
12:16You think of this hair, you think VIVA.
12:18Nutrafol.com.
12:19Code VIVA.
12:19You get $10 off your first month subscription.
12:22Nutrafol.
12:22The number one selling men's hair growth supplement in the world.
12:26Out there.
12:26On the planet.
12:27In the galaxy.
12:28You want a bite of this potato hash?
12:35Yeah.
12:35But I got bird's eggs going on over there.
12:37Yeah, whatever you got, I want it.
12:38Yeah, the spider cookout starts now.
12:40It is kind of like a bullshit grill, so I'm not super confident, but yeah, throw two down.
12:46Throw two down to start.
12:48Two down to start.
12:49Is it like an air fryer?
12:50Yes, an air fryer and a grill.
12:52Throw some cheese on there.
12:53The plastic.
12:54I don't want one, but you are playing string cheese on it?
12:59Yeah, I mean, I asked you to get the cheese.
13:02If everybody wants to go to the destination, nobody wants to take the journey.
13:06Well, man, if you could get the cheese, that'd be super helpful.
13:08We had real cheese this whole time?
13:10Yeah, go help.
13:11He's going to come back empty-handed.
13:12Grab the mustard, too.
13:14Oh, yeah, that's coming together nice.
13:17I think we should flip this.
13:18Yep, flip.
13:19Give those a flip.
13:20Oh, gosh, gosh, gosh.
13:22That's wrong.
13:22All right.
13:23That's fine, right?
13:24You can put it right there if this isn't ventilating at all.
13:26At least you and I are doing it directly by the smoke alarm.
13:30Great course.
13:32Where is that microphone?
13:34It's a fan.
13:35What happened to the fan?
13:36I'll tip you, too, if you guarantee me a burger.
13:38Yeah, I mean, again, if I don't burn the place down, I'm happy to continue.
13:41There's no smoke.
13:42Where's the fan?
13:43Where's my fan?
13:43I thought I had a fan coming.
13:45Yeah, let's see.
13:46Unplug.
13:46Unplug.
13:47Yeah, unplug, unplug.
13:48I'm done.
13:48It's directly below the fire alarm.
13:51Yeah, I was trying to go to the industrial kitchen that was built specifically for the
13:53business.
13:53Listen, before I looked like an asshole, they were filming it.
13:56TJ, let me get your cheese.
13:57Stop opening it.
13:58Stop opening it.
13:59Caitlin, you hungry, Caitlin?
14:02Fun, fun, fun, fun, fun.
14:04Oh, look at that.
14:06Oh, look at that.
14:07Look at that.
14:09Oh, there's fun.
14:09The haters are furious, this one.
14:12Let's go.
14:14Oh my God, that actually looks good.
14:15You cooked it perfect.
14:16Oh my God, it's perfectly medium rare.
14:19Perfect.
14:20Let's go.
14:21Honestly, delightful.
14:23Roasted oil.
14:23Uh, he said we killed a myth.
14:25His is a little, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh.
14:29It's good.
14:30It's just, it's a little dry.
14:32No, it's great.
14:33We'll go last week.
14:33For what you're working with, great job.
14:37You got the next one.
14:38You want to grab the rest of it?
14:39I just want a hot dog.
14:41Okay.
14:41I just want a singular hot dog.
14:48Sure.
14:48Overall, 6.1 out of 10.
14:59I mean, I can't have 6.1 come out of my kitchen.
15:02All things considered, dude.
15:04It's not a grilled dog.
15:05It's not a grilled dog.
15:07I think he needs a second or third opinion.
15:11Oh, fuck.
15:12I turned it off.
15:13Yeah, oh, it's getting smoky and shit.
15:15Fuck.
15:16If I stop lofting it for like 10 seconds, the room just smells smoky.
15:29I'm sorry.
Recommended
1:21
0:36
11:41
4:18
2:57