- anteayer
After several buildings are inexplicably blown up, CONTROL follows the trail to an art gallery where a former chemist, debonair Rex Savage, has teamed up with painter Mondo to produce a series of explosive paintings. 99 disguises herself as an art expert with Max as her driver/butler as they try to get Savage's fingerprints and photograph, something that turns out to be more complicated than expected.
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00:00Oh, baby, must be hungry.
00:2186.
00:2299.
00:23The chief wants your surveillance report.
00:25Right.
00:308.40, the consul general entered.
00:34At 9.12, a telephone repairman went in and came out again at 9.46.
00:39Nothing suspicious there.
00:40A telephone repairman?
00:42But Max, a phony telephone repairman could have anything that needs repair kits.
00:46He was checked out by security.
00:48Believe me, 99, I know what I'm doing.
00:50I know, Max, but supposing someone is trying to blow up this consulate?
00:54We don't know that, 99.
00:56All we know is the anonymous tip said that the consul general's life was in danger.
01:01Now, if you don't mind, I'd like to get on with my report.
01:03Sorry, Max.
01:05At 10.15, a State Department official enters.
01:07He left at 11.22.
01:09At 12.06, a man delivered a pen and he came out just three minutes ago.
01:13Now, give me your pen and I'll sign the report.
01:15Right.
01:1512.09, the consulate blew up.
01:3911.9, the consulateös.
01:4812.10a
02:33Where did you find this?
02:43In the wreckage of the consulate, Chief.
02:45It's part of a painting that was delivered from an art gallery just a few minutes before the explosion.
02:49An art gallery owned by a man named Rex Savage?
02:53Right, Chief.
02:54How did you know that?
02:56Pieces of paintings from the Savage gallery have been found at the scene of the last two explosions.
03:01Where were the other two explosions, Chief?
03:02An embassy and a police station.
03:04Any connection between them?
03:05All three places had information on file that would have been detrimental to chaos.
03:10That information was destroyed in each explosion.
03:13I think it's time for us to get intelligence to give us a rundown on Rex Savage.
03:17Wait a minute, Chief. I've already taken care of that.
03:19I'm having the information transferred here through our inner office top secret relay.
03:23I think it's coming through now, Chief.
03:31Thank you, Max.
03:35The intelligence section apparently has no file on Savage, no picture, no fingerprints, nothing.
03:46That can't be right, Chief.
03:50Well, either our boys are lying down on the job, or this rock is a forgery.
03:55Come on, that's the official control rock, Max. Look.
03:58Oh, yes. Our name and address is on it.
04:01If found, drop in any mailbox.
04:04I want Savage's fingerprints and a picture taken of him right away.
04:0899 will give you the cover of a wealthy society girl.
04:11A patron of the arts, right?
04:12Correct.
04:13Make contact with him and use this pencil.
04:17Oh, wait a minute, Chief.
04:19Won't it look a little suspicious if she starts drawing his picture?
04:21That's for his fingerprints, Max.
04:27This pencil has been scientifically treated.
04:30If you can get him to touch it with his fingers, it will leave an impression of his prints.
04:34Right.
04:35Well, what about me, Chief?
04:36You can pose as her chauffeur.
04:38Oh, that's a good idea.
04:41And have Parker hide a micro-camera somewhere in your uniform so you can take Savage's picture.
04:46Right, Chief.
04:47Come on, honey, now.
04:48Okay.
04:49Oh, Max, wait a minute.
04:49That rock goes back to Message Center.
04:54Oh, right, Chief.
05:01Here you are, my dear.
05:03A little gift for you.
05:04Thank you, Max.
05:05See you soon.
05:06Of course.
05:07Goodbye.
05:08Goodbye.
05:08Goodbye.
05:13Savage, I thought you were through with that, Gretchen.
05:15Go back.
05:16Her consulate has already been blown up.
05:17She came in and started asking questions.
05:20She must be eliminated.
05:22She will, Mondo.
05:24I just gave her one of our ingenious works of art with the time-explosive paint.
05:31And in five minutes, there won't be a trace of her.
05:34What a combination of talents.
05:35Here am I, one of the world's greatest artists, and you, one of the world's most ingenious chemists.
05:41And after our next painting is delivered, the whole world will hear of us.
05:47Where will it hang?
05:49In the Pentagon.
05:50I don't think I understand modern art, Max.
06:03What do these paintings mean?
06:05Well, it's really quite simple.
06:08Let's take this painting over here as an example.
06:10Okay.
06:11Now, let me see.
06:14I think this is a street scene.
06:17You see, the buildings in the background symbolize the vast forces of nature.
06:21And the loneliness, insignificance, and constant struggle of man is represented by that little black doll.
06:29Max, look at that modern sculpture.
06:45It's made out of a dented hubcap, rusty fender, tin cans, nuts and bolts, and a bicycle chain.
06:52Yes.
06:53He's given us man's eternal struggle against the universe out of a pile of junk.
06:58What's it called?
06:59A pile of junk.
07:05Mondo, it's eight o'clock.
07:07We'll close the gallery as soon as these people leave.
07:09Yes, Mr. Savage.
07:12Max, that's Savage.
07:13Is your camera ready?
07:15I'll check.
07:18Now, all I have to do is to get his face in front of this lens,
07:22and then press this button, and I've got his picture.
07:25Right.
07:25And I'll get his fingerprints on the special pencil.
07:27Good evening.
07:34I'd be honored to offer my assistance to someone so attractive.
07:38Well, thank you.
07:39But it's the lady who's interested in buying a painting.
07:41Yes, I, um...
07:45Oh, my.
07:46Oh, I'll get it.
07:49There we are.
07:50Thank you, Maxwell.
07:51What style of painting do you feel most at home with, Miss...
07:55Uh, Westbrook.
07:56Uh, Melissa Westbrook.
07:58Oh, I like many different styles.
08:00Uh, my own collection is varied.
08:02Oh, I...
08:02I'll get it.
08:04After you, sir.
08:05Here you are.
08:10Uh, does the, uh, modern technique of painting appeal to you?
08:15Oh, yes, it does very much, uh, in the hands of the proper artist, of course.
08:21Oh, well, uh, we have a beautiful selection.
08:24In that corner, we have some rather interesting examples of Impressionist painting.
08:28Mm.
08:28And over on that wall are some of our better non-objective works.
08:33And, of course, as you can see, there are examples of, uh, cubistic, surrealist, and even the naturalistic techniques.
08:39Uh-huh.
08:43There's something wrong with your chauffeur.
08:46Uh, Maxwell's, uh, lip reader.
08:49Mr. Suggins.
08:54Excuse me.
08:55Of course.
08:57Missed.
08:58Set it up again, Max.
08:59Oh, that's a shame about the pencil.
09:02You don't suppose that the chief would go for a nice, good, clean set of glove prints, do you?
09:09Wait a minute.
09:10If I could just get him alone.
09:12Right.
09:14What do you mean, alone?
09:16Well, he can't keep his gloves on forever.
09:19Yeah, well, I don't think you should be alone with him.
09:22Max, you sound like you're jealous.
09:25Jealous?
09:26Well, that's ridiculous, 99.
09:28It's just that that man might turn out to be a dangerous kisser.
09:32Uh, killer.
09:35Something about those two.
09:37Something peculiar.
09:38What do you mean?
09:40I'm sure I've seen that man before.
09:43Get his picture and we'll check it through Chaos Headquarters.
09:47I'll keep the girl busy.
09:49Oh, Miss Westbrook.
09:50Yes, Mr. Savage.
09:52Please, call me Rex.
09:55Please call me Melissa.
09:56Melissa, take a look at these.
09:58Well, sir.
09:58Uh, just call me Maxwell.
10:01Maxwell.
10:02There's a painting over here I think you ought to see.
10:05I'd love to.
10:06It's just over here.
10:07I think this is one of the finest examples of realistic painting that we've ever hung.
10:13What is it called?
10:15The camera.
10:17How provocative.
10:20If you look a little more closely, you'll see that the painter has included every detail.
10:26Marvelous work.
10:31Is there anything else I could show you?
10:34Yes.
10:34How about some cold compressors for my eyes?
10:42It's the funniest looking painting I've ever seen.
10:44Miss Westbrook, are you ready to leave now?
10:46Oh, Mr. Savage is going to drive me home, Maxwell.
10:48You can go on ahead.
10:49Well, what about me?
10:50I mean, why can't I drive the two of you?
10:52The two's company.
10:53Three's a crowd.
10:54Well, maybe I could get a friend.
10:56Just do this.
10:58That'll be all, Maxwell.
10:59It's a beautiful evening.
11:00I thought perhaps we might take a drive through the park.
11:03Oh, Mr. Savage.
11:05Yes.
11:24Hello, Chief.
11:44Max.
11:44I'm in Lover's Lane.
11:46Listen, Chief.
11:47Before I fill you in, I want you to give a message to Parker at the lab.
11:51Tell him that there are a few adjustments needed on the steering wheel phone.
11:55Every time I turn the corner, I dial the operator.
11:57Never mind that, Max.
11:59Just give me your report.
12:01Right, Chief.
12:0599 is in the car with Savage.
12:07She's still trying to get his fingerprints.
12:09I think he's beginning to help her.
12:15I hope you're not in Lover's Lane by yourself.
12:18It could draw attention to you.
12:19Don't worry, Chief.
12:21I have my inflato girl with me.
12:23Okay, Max.
12:24I'll check in later.
12:25This moonlight is made to order.
12:36Oh, it's just perfect.
12:40Do you know something?
12:42What?
12:43Your glove is scratching my cheek.
12:46Would you mind terribly just dubbing?
12:48Why, of course not, my dear.
12:50I'm sorry.
12:51Oh, it's nothing, really.
12:52Okay.
12:55Is that better?
13:04Just lovely.
13:18All right, fellow.
13:19What are you doing up here?
13:21Actually, nothing, officer.
13:22We're just sitting here looking at the trees.
13:25Now, what about that dummy?
13:28Well, this is Lover's Lane, isn't it?
13:30I'd look pretty peculiar sitting up here by myself.
13:33What kind of weirdo are you?
13:36Oh, I don't know.
13:37Just a plain, normal, everyday weirdo, I guess.
13:40I think you better tell me what you're doing up here.
13:43Well, I can explain, officer.
13:45You see, I needed a girl, and I carry this one in my trunk.
13:48Let me put it this way.
13:53This isn't really my girl.
13:55I just use her for emergencies.
14:00You see, officer, I'm a secret.
14:04No, I better not reveal my identity.
14:06Officer, do you know where I could get a flat fixed?
14:28Max, I told you to be careful and not call attention to yourself.
14:33But I wasn't doing anything wrong, Chief.
14:36I was just sitting in my chauffeur's uniform with my rubber dummy.
14:39So what did the police charge you with?
14:42Violating Section 387B of the Penal Code.
14:45Which is?
14:47Sitting in a chauffeur's uniform next to a rubber dummy.
14:51Oh, yes.
14:51You've been trying to get that law repealed for several years.
14:54Who has?
14:55The rubber dummy lobby.
14:56Well, thanks for bailing me out anyway, Chief.
15:03Oh, that's all right, Max.
15:05Now, what about Savage's photographs?
15:07Well, I couldn't get any pictures of them.
15:09You what?
15:11I'm sorry, Chief.
15:12But I got some beauts of myself.
15:14What about Savage's fingerprints?
15:17Oh.
15:18Well, you know, Chief, he wears gloves.
15:20And he never takes those gloves off for a minute.
15:23This is fantastic.
15:24Here we are, one of the best-known secret organizations in the country.
15:29And we can't even get a simple little set of fingerprints.
15:35Chief, I've just made a date with Rex Savage.
15:37He's coming to my apartment for an intimate supper.
15:41You did what?
15:43Did you hear that, Chief?
15:44An intimate supper date with that potential killer.
15:47Good work, 99.
15:49Good work, 99.
15:50I knew you'd like her plan, Chief.
15:52Now, apparently, there are only two occasions when Rex takes his gloves off.
15:55One is when he eats, and the other is when he bathes.
15:58He's coming up to my place about 11 o'clock.
16:00Isn't that a little late for a bath?
16:03Yes, it's an intimate supper.
16:05Excellent.
16:07Listen, Chief.
16:08Why don't they come to my apartment?
16:10And I could act as the butler and keep my eye on Savage.
16:13Good idea.
16:14Your apartment is larger.
16:15It's more the kind of place that Melissa Westbrook might live in.
16:19This may be our chance to get a full dossier on Savage.
16:22Let's go down to the lab.
16:23Right.
16:27This tableware is specially rigged.
16:30When this subject sits down to his meal, the following things will happen.
16:34This chemically treated soup spoon will trigger a camera built into the bottom of a soup plate.
16:39Every time I take a spoonful of soup, the plate takes my picture.
16:42Watch.
16:42What about the flash?
16:50Won't he see the flash?
16:52Ah, it'll be absorbed by the soup.
16:54And you'll have to remove the soup plate before he gets to the bottom.
16:58Right.
16:58And this roll is made out of a special composite.
17:03When the subject takes it, it'll make a perfect impression of all of his fingerprints.
17:07Which means that you'll have to get it away from him before he eats it.
17:10Or, uh, use another roll.
17:13Very good, Parker.
17:15Anything else, Professor?
17:16One more device.
17:17This bowl of fruit will give us a sample of the subject's speaking voice.
17:21There's a tape recorder built into this apple.
17:24That's fantastic, Professor.
17:26But where's the microphone?
17:29Oh, the microphone.
17:30It's right in here.
17:31It's in your stomach.
17:52To you.
17:56To us.
18:01Melissa.
18:02Hmm.
18:03Ever since I met you, there's only one thing that I'm able to think about.
18:07What's that, Rex?
18:07Rex.
18:12It's five minutes to dinner.
18:14I thought we were going to be alone tonight.
18:18Oh, uh, Maxwell, uh, he's just here to serve supper.
18:21After that, I assure you, we'll be quite alone.
18:26I hope that this will be the first of many midnight suppers, my dear.
18:30So do I, Rex.
18:31As I was saying, the only thing that I have been able to think about all days...
18:48Come and get it!
18:51Maxwell.
18:55Well, um, I guess we had better go eat supper.
19:01Oh, come on, Rex.
19:02Don't let Maxwell bother you.
19:06Actually, he's been in the family for years, and I still don't know how to handle him.
19:10May I suggest the rack?
19:16Thank you, Maxwell.
19:18You're welcome, 99.
19:21What did he call you?
19:23He said, uh, 90-night.
19:25It's a little game we used to play as children.
19:2890-night, Maxwell.
19:36Try the Suprex.
19:37I think you'll like it.
19:38What kind is it?
19:40Cream of Technicolor.
19:46Mmm.
19:47Very good.
19:49Very.
19:53That wasn't finished.
19:55We don't want the soup to get cold, sir.
19:56Here.
19:57Why don't you try a roll?
20:05Who could that be?
20:10I'll get it, ma'am.
20:11In the meantime, why don't you two just talk amongst yourselves?
20:16And don't be afraid to speak up.
20:19Maxwell, tell whomever's at the door to come back tomorrow.
20:25Yes, ma'am.
20:27I wonder if you'd mind coming back tomorrow.
20:30Some people just can't stand rejection.
20:34Turn back to keep your hands up.
20:37Mondo, what are you doing here?
20:38You've been tricked, Savage.
20:39This man is no butler.
20:41You're telling me.
20:43In a report on his photograph of Chaos Headquarters, he's Maxwell Smart.
20:47An agent for control.
20:49Max, here!
20:50Good throw, 99.
20:52Good catch, Mondo.
20:54You'll never get away with this, Savage.
21:04Oh?
21:05Why, Mr. Smart?
21:07Because at this very minute, 25 control agents are converging on this building.
21:12Would you believe it?
21:1325 control agents.
21:15I find that hard to believe.
21:17Would you believe two squad cars and a motorcycle cop?
21:21I don't think so.
21:24How about a vicious street cleaner and a toothless police dog?
21:29If you were expecting help, it would have been here already.
21:33Now, my dear Melissa, you are going to paint Mr. Smart to death.
21:40Yes, this can contains explosive paint with a timing device mixed in.
21:46This paint contains a vibration explosive that detonates the moment a window or a door is slammed.
21:51And this can contains nitro floor paint.
21:55It explodes the instant anyone steps on it.
21:57Are you?
22:00Start painting Mr. Smart with the time explosive mixture.
22:10Nitro floor paint.
22:11That's right.
22:12One false move and you'll be blown to kingdom come.
22:15Come on, Max.
22:17Good work, 99.
22:19Well, we've done it again.
22:21They think just because we're on the side of good that we're soft.
22:25But what they don't know is that we're tough and hard and do a very nice job.
22:29That's why they're trapped in this room and can't get out.
22:32Come on, 99.
22:34Wait a minute.
22:34Don't move.
22:35You're in the same position as we are.
22:37You can't leave this room either.
22:38If you take one step, we'll all be blown to bits.
22:40That's right.
22:40Got any ideas, Max?
22:53Well, why don't we all join in a big chorus of help?
22:59Help!
23:01Shh!
23:03The vibration paint.
23:04Ah.
23:10Well, that finishes up the apartment, 99.
23:30A nice, fresh paint job.
23:32We did a beautiful job, Max.
23:34Oh, thank you, 99.
23:35You know, when the chief rescued us and I saw all these cans of paint lying around Savage's art gallery,
23:40I figured I might as well put them to good use.
23:43Well, what do you say we go down to the diner and I buy you a cup of coffee while the paint dries?
23:47Lovely.
23:50Max, are you sure this paint's all right?
23:53Of course it is.
23:54I checked every can of paint in the gallery and memorized the non-explosive ones.
23:59Come on.
23:59Come on.
24:10Max.
24:15Don't worry, 99.
24:16I covered the furniture.
24:17Max.
24:18Don't worry, 99.
24:18I covered the furniture.
24:19Oh, you are you sure this paint's all right?
24:27Oh, yeah.
24:29Oh, man.
24:30All right.
24:31Oh, my God.
24:31Oh, my God.
24:32Look.
24:37All right.
24:38Ooh, my God.
24:39Oh, my God.
24:40Oh, my God.
24:41What?
24:42I'll meet you.
24:43Look at all.
24:45I'm in the camera where you keep our turn.
24:46Well, please.
24:46Hope, help, help, help, help.
24:48¶¶
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