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Celebrity Gogglebox Season 7 Episode 1

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00:00You know, the one thing about chilling out like this watching telly is,
00:06I can't believe you're doing it in a pair of jeans on the couch.
00:09I can't sit like that all night.
00:11This is me.
00:13I have to be comfy, pal.
00:14I've got to let everything...
00:15I know, I know what I mean.
00:16I've got to let the old...
00:17Yeah.
00:18Breathe.
00:18Do you not get, like...
00:20I do.
00:21I'm on edge.
00:22Because of them.
00:23I know, but the last time you and I sat in front of a telly in our hundreds,
00:26it was a completely different night, Patrick.
00:28So, I didn't want to go back there.
00:30Do you know what I mean?
00:31Rolling back there, yeah.
00:32We don't need any more flashbacks.
00:33No, we don't.
00:36Ah!
00:37What?
00:38I'm so happy for you.
00:39Woo!
00:39I feel bad even saying it, but you're not looking at it.
00:43Not even black people come that late, boy.
00:47Oh, no.
00:49Little tash, you know, that lot.
00:51Curly air.
00:51It looks like a scouser.
00:52Yeah.
00:53Ah!
00:55It's the first time I've been furious at carbohydrates.
00:58Oh!
00:58Why is she dressed as a pilgrim father?
01:01She's a United fan.
01:03Oh, I've gone right off her.
01:04There you go.
01:05In the week Noel got the tube to start rehearsals with Liam, we enjoyed lots of great telly.
01:12There was edge-of-your-seat drama on Britain's Canal Network.
01:16Oh!
01:16That's my camera bashing into a low bridge.
01:21I don't think I can think of anything more peaceful than a little narrowboat.
01:28I'd love that.
01:28Look, I'm not a yacht person.
01:30No.
01:31Don't be near with lobster and stuff like that and living the life in sunglasses.
01:34It's just, it's not for me.
01:35That sounds like jealousy.
01:36Yeah.
01:37Creeping through.
01:38I don't want that anyway.
01:38Donald ushered Elon out of the White House with a parting gift on ITV News.
01:45He was given this golden goodbye.
01:48Thank you, Elon.
01:49Take care of yourself.
01:51Oh, what a load of rubbish, really.
01:56Where's he going to put that key?
01:59Maybe he'll let little X play with it and whack him in the head again, give him another
02:04black eye.
02:05No, I'd like to shove it.
02:08And Big Zoo was picking the poshest thing on the menu on Sky.
02:12We've got to see how these people live.
02:14Hello.
02:15And what they eat.
02:17Do you have jack of potatoes?
02:18We put caviar on it.
02:20Wow.
02:21You know what I love?
02:22Cheap trifle.
02:24Oh.
02:25Cream.
02:26Come on.
02:27Hundreds and thousands.
02:28Custard.
02:29Jelly.
02:30Couple of lady fingers in the bottom.
02:31Come on.
02:32Matron.
02:32But it's my favourite.
02:33Come on.
02:33I love it.
02:35In fact, if I get a posh one where it's all fruits and Madagascan, I'm like, shite.
02:40Give me the cheap stuff.
02:48In West London.
02:50Is it biscuit time?
02:51It is biscuit time.
02:53What kind of mood are you in?
02:54Because you know, like, I love custard creams, but I just feel at the moment I'm more leaning
02:59on the side of bourbon.
03:00I'm more of a bourbon.
03:02Alex and her girlfriend, Jess.
03:05Back in the day when you're thinking about if you wanted a fancy biscuit, like, bourbon
03:09or custard cream wouldn't make the list.
03:11No.
03:12Exactly.
03:12It's not a hobnob.
03:14That's what I'm saying.
03:14Yeah.
03:15I hear you.
03:16Oh, my gosh.
03:16You love a custard cream more and I love a bourbon more.
03:20What are you saying?
03:23Hello there.
03:25This one we got on so well.
03:27It's me and you.
03:27On Saturday night, we were back on the bridge with Ross Kemp on BBC One.
03:35Oh, I love this.
03:36I love a quiz.
03:37Get Bridget Lies on.
03:38The one with Ross Kemp.
03:39Get Bridget Lies on.
03:39We love Ross Kemp.
03:40This one, you can shout at them because they often go for the road and go, no, no, stop
03:45it.
03:46The other way.
03:47I think my general knowledge is orky.
03:50You're, do you know what?
03:51You're incredibly smart.
03:52Surprisingly intelligent.
03:53Yeah.
03:54You hide it so well.
03:55Welcome to Celebrity Bridge of Life, where every step counts.
04:00This is it.
04:01All right.
04:02Let's see.
04:03Come on, then.
04:03Who'd say?
04:04I'm the Bolton Brains bragging rights.
04:08Rachel.
04:09Hello.
04:10Oh, I like Rachel.
04:11I like Rachel Riley.
04:11She should be good, Rachel Riley, because she's, like, good with maths.
04:15Mm.
04:15You know what I'm saying?
04:16Words as well.
04:17Yeah.
04:17Yeah, man.
04:18Something about Rachel Riley.
04:20I don't know what it is.
04:21Like, you know when you're like a celebrity crush?
04:25What you're not supposed to have.
04:26She's a United fan.
04:28Oh, I've gone right off her.
04:29There you go.
04:30Bridget, please reveal the final category.
04:34I like him.
04:34He's a good geezer, him.
04:36He's a good geezer.
04:37He's very eyebrow-y, isn't he, Ross Kemp?
04:38Yeah.
04:39That moves his eyebrows.
04:40That's because he's got a bald head.
04:41If he had a bit of hair, you wouldn't have noticed it.
04:43I think more people think Ross Kemp is my dad than you.
04:47Everybody.
04:49Names.
04:51Names.
04:51Great with, I'm great with names.
04:53Are you good with names?
04:53Names of?
04:55Anything.
04:55Yeah, I'm good with names.
04:56No, I'm not.
04:57I'm not good with names.
04:57I'm good with faces, not names.
04:58Yeah, I'm the same.
04:59Bridge.
05:00What are we looking for?
05:03Foodie names.
05:04Food.
05:05Foodie names.
05:06Like, what does that mean?
05:07You've just got to find a name that's got food in it.
05:12Right.
05:13That's not easy.
05:14We're going to need examples, Denise, then we'll get it.
05:16Rachel, we are looking for real or fictional people with names that include food.
05:23Oh, Kath.
05:25Yeah, Kath.
05:26Kath.
05:27Café, yeah.
05:28Um, Sean Bean.
05:29All right, yeah, macaroon, you know, macaroon.
05:32Oh, no.
05:33That's Macron.
05:34Oh, yeah, I thought it was macaroon.
05:36Stephen Fry Chicken.
05:37Stephen Fry Chicken.
05:39Yeah, OK, that works.
05:40Your five minutes starts now.
05:45The Apprentice host.
05:46Alan Sugar, that's real.
05:47Yeah, that's real.
05:48And Fred Astaire's famous dance partner.
05:50Ginger Rogers.
05:51Ah, well done.
05:52He's Fred Astaire's famous dance partner.
05:53Tina Fey's 30 Rock character.
05:56Lemon.
05:57Liz Lemon.
05:58There you go, Larry Lamb.
05:59Played Archie Mitchell in Extenders.
06:02Channel 4 Bake Off Judge with Paul Hollywood.
06:05Mary Berry.
06:06Mary Berry.
06:07Prue Leaf.
06:07Yeah, that's not food, is it?
06:08Yeah, Leaf.
06:09Yeah, you eat a leaf.
06:10Salad.
06:11It's a leaf.
06:11You don't eat any salad.
06:13Oh, yeah.
06:13All right, fine.
06:13Lettuce.
06:14Lettuce Leaf.
06:15No, it's Prue Leaf.
06:16Leaf.
06:17No, her name...
06:18Yeah, Salad Leaf.
06:18No, her name is Leather.
06:20All right, Salad Leaf.
06:21No.
06:21Played Archie Mitchell.
06:24Mary Berry.
06:25No, it's not.
06:26No, it is Mary Berry.
06:27Not anymore.
06:28No, but I'd argue that with Ross.
06:30I'd go, hey, hang on a minute.
06:31You want to argue with Ross?
06:32Yeah, that's true, isn't it?
06:32You go, oh, fair enough.
06:33Yeah.
06:34Then opens up rapper Sean Corey Carter.
06:38Sean Carter is not food.
06:40No.
06:40That's Jay-Z.
06:41Yeah, that's Jay-Z.
06:42Well done with your rap knowledge.
06:44Then opens up treasure hunt host named Annika...
06:48Annika Rice.
06:49Rice, Rice.
06:50Rice, Rice.
06:51Who's the Lance Corporal in Pike.
06:53Pike, Pike, Pike.
06:54You're at four minutes.
06:55You're nearly halfway across, so take a breath.
06:58Why is she dressed as a pilgrim father?
07:00Buffalo Stance singer.
07:01Nina Cherry.
07:03Cherry.
07:03No.
07:04Oh, she, she, she, fucking, I know her.
07:09Cherry.
07:10Me, Mariah, Kelly.
07:11Me, I, Chet, me, I, Mariah.
07:14I'm just going to try and go forwards, because I can't, I've got no logic to use.
07:18Yes, you've got it.
07:19You've got that cherry.
07:19Cherry, yeah, stay there.
07:21Stay there, Rach.
07:22Well, Nina, Nina, Nina's not a food.
07:25Truth or lie?
07:27No, you're wrong, mate.
07:29That is the truth.
07:30What?
07:30That's Nina Cherry.
07:32Cherry.
07:33Fucking hell of a, fuck, I know, I know her.
07:36Okay, you've halved your money, you're down to 1,600, nothing else will open up.
07:41He takes away half, just like that.
07:43Oh, he is, I always was a robbing fuck.
07:47Soft sells keyboard player.
07:49Soft sells.
07:50Oh, Mark, Mark.
07:52Armand.
07:52Armand.
07:53Armand.
07:54Mark, Armand.
07:55Mark, Armand.
07:55Yeah.
07:56Mark, Armand.
07:56Armand.
07:58North, North, North, North, North, North, North, North.
07:59The keyboard player.
08:02Oh, I don't know.
08:03You know what, I'm going to go here and then at least I've got two if it's...
08:06No!
08:07Yeah, she's going to go there to Mark, Armand.
08:09No, she's not.
08:09She wants to go to Patricia.
08:10Oh, no, go Mark, Armand.
08:11Mark, Armand.
08:12I'm going to go for this one.
08:14Oh, no.
08:14Wrong, wrong.
08:15Oh, no.
08:18That is the truth.
08:19Oh, it's right.
08:20Yes.
08:21Right, she's nearly the other girl.
08:23That opens up Bond girl played by Ursula Andres.
08:26That's the one where she comes out the water.
08:28Pussy galore.
08:29Oh, no, it's not pussy galore.
08:30I was going to say.
08:31Food, I was going to...
08:32Let's leave it.
08:35I don't want to say anything bad about what I would...
08:37Food item.
08:38She's panicking.
08:39It's not this stressful on Countdown, is it?
08:41Soft sell.
08:42Mark, Armand.
08:44Mark, Armand.
08:45That crack and flies back.
08:46Fucking hell.
08:47No, I won't.
08:48Just keep the eye on it.
08:49One minute for me.
08:50So, that's probably Jason Orange.
08:52No, it's not.
08:52It's not Jason Orange.
08:54No, go for soft sell.
08:55Robbie Williams is the youngest.
08:56Don't do that.
08:57Don't want to half your money.
08:58Youngest original take that was Robbie Williams.
09:00Yeah.
09:01See?
09:01That's what she said.
09:02Yes, Rachel.
09:04Good girl, Rachel.
09:05Phew.
09:06Everyone at home is shouting at me.
09:07Shall I go soft sell or wrong?
09:09Ah.
09:10Don't go soft sell.
09:12Don't go soft sell, no.
09:14Because I can't remember his name.
09:15Little Tash, you know, that lot.
09:17Curly hair.
09:17Looks like a scouser.
09:18Yeah.
09:19I'm going to go soft sell.
09:21No!
09:21What are you doing?
09:22No.
09:23No.
09:24Truth or lie?
09:26Lie.
09:26Oh, my goodness.
09:28It's a lie.
09:29Oh, it ain't Mark Armand.
09:31Oh, blue is it.
09:32Oh, hey, I'm Mark Armand.
09:33Sure, show it out.
09:34Let's see who it was.
09:36Truth or lie?
09:38It is a truth.
09:39Honey Ryder.
09:42Honey Ryder.
09:43Honey Ryder, of course.
09:45That was it.
09:46So he was in it, Mark Armand?
09:48Mark Armand was in soft sell, but he weren't...
09:49But he weren't the keyboard player.
09:51Oh, whatever.
09:51Whatever, the drummer or whatever they are.
09:53Oh.
09:54Oh, what a fucking nightmare that was.
10:03In Essex.
10:05I think I might have made a mistake, footwear-wise.
10:07Mm-hmm.
10:08Not for shoes, but for my socks.
10:09Look.
10:10Why'd they say holey?
10:10Yeah, like, they're kind of see-through.
10:13Best mates Jordan and Perry.
10:15You've got real dancers feet, man.
10:18OK, you're also a dancer.
10:19Yeah, but you've got, like, extra knuckles on your toes.
10:21Do you know what I mean?
10:22Like, you've got that.
10:22And it's not a problem, but they are.
10:24OK, well, out of the two of us,
10:25who actually has athlete's foot?
10:27You.
10:28So.
10:29He's...
10:30He's laughing now.
10:33Should get that cleared up, man.
10:34Get some ointment or something.
10:37On Tuesday night,
10:39we were taking on another big boating adventure with this.
10:43Quick, hurry up.
10:44What?
10:44Because we're going to miss canal boat diaries.
10:46So you don't change the channel.
10:48Have you been on a canal boat?
10:50Yeah, bro.
10:50Slept on one.
10:51Really?
10:52Horrible experience.
10:55I'm Robbie Cumming.
10:58That's me.
10:59Hello.
11:00That's him.
11:00I've watched this before.
11:01I love him.
11:02You know what?
11:02I think Robbie's now become one of me heroes.
11:05And this is my narrowboat home,
11:08the naughty lass.
11:09The naughty lass.
11:10Hello.
11:11I like that.
11:12I like that.
11:12Naughty lass.
11:14Double entendre.
11:15Come on.
11:15Come on.
11:16I learned that word recently, you know.
11:17Really?
11:19I've been waiting to use it, boy.
11:21For a decade,
11:23I've been exploring our rivers and canals.
11:25So does he actually live on the boat?
11:28Yeah, I think he does.
11:30Lovely start to the morning.
11:31He just had his hands in the naughty lass's gearbox, then.
11:35Can you show that on the telly?
11:36This time, I'm tackling the Basingstoke Canal.
11:41The Basingstoke Canal.
11:44Don't want to throw shade at anyone here.
11:46Doesn't sound amazing.
11:49So, jump on board for my canal boat diaries.
11:52Do you reckon by lock three, it's a bit boring?
12:00I think it's...
12:01Like, the first one's quite fun.
12:02Yeah.
12:03The second one, you get the end of it,
12:04and then you're like, are this again?
12:05Novelty's worn off.
12:06Yeah.
12:07This trip is likely to be a bit of a challenge for me.
12:10Go on.
12:11The Basingstoke Canal is notorious for weed.
12:16Basingstoke Canal's notorious for weed.
12:18It is.
12:19Always, always was.
12:20Always was, yeah.
12:20Always was, mate.
12:21Weed?
12:22Weed.
12:22What?
12:23Weed, weed.
12:24Oh.
12:25Getting caught on the propeller.
12:27Oh, no, weeds.
12:28Oh, weeds.
12:29I thought you meant weed.
12:30No.
12:30Although it's somewhere I'm really looking forward to exploring,
12:33there is a side of me that's thinking,
12:35can I actually make it to the end?
12:37I don't know.
12:38Oh, shit.
12:38There's the jeopardy.
12:39Robbie, don't be mad.
12:40Turn back.
12:42It's the Basingstoke Canal.
12:44As soon as I enter it, there's a massive raft of weeds.
12:48Oh.
12:49He's got to get through those weeds.
12:50Yeah.
12:50And what we know, the Basingstoke Canal is notorious for them, Denise.
12:55Here we go.
12:57I love you.
12:58Go on.
12:59Thankfully, that weed wasn't a worry.
13:01Oh, thank God for that.
13:03That's it.
13:04I'm so happy for you.
13:05Woo!
13:05Right, another early morning, and I just need to make myself some breakfast before I set off.
13:12Oh, what's he going to have?
13:13Oh, what's he going to have?
13:13This is going to be interesting.
13:15Oh, what's he got?
13:17Looking at my supplies here of my homemade muesli.
13:21That needs to be topped up.
13:23Oh, there's nothing like watching someone make their own muesli.
13:27I'll tell you what, mate.
13:29Oh, mate.
13:30That's it.
13:31Life in the fast lane.
13:32Add some more oats.
13:33Some seeds.
13:35Dried fruit.
13:36That's not breakfast.
13:38No.
13:39And I usually put in some kind of naughty, sugary cereal, so I've got some hoops.
13:44Hang on.
13:45He's chucked some Cheerios in there.
13:47Yeah.
13:48That's not healthy.
13:49He's the most wholesome, but boring man I've ever...
13:53And, guys, no-one's said anything but, uh, Frosty Truddies.
13:57It's like, ooooh!
13:59Oh, I feel sorry for him now.
14:04Why?
14:05I don't know.
14:06Look at him.
14:07Look at his little hat.
14:08That's so patronising.
14:09Look at his little hat.
14:10He's coming into fleet.
14:14Oh, he's coming into fleet now.
14:16Oh!
14:17I've just seen possibly the lowest bridge that I've ever come across.
14:22Oh.
14:23Oh, no.
14:24This is the highlight of his day.
14:28This is hilarious.
14:30That's going to be tricky.
14:35I bet the boat gets stuck.
14:38Well, if it does, it'll liven it the fuck up.
14:40Yeah.
14:41Oh!
14:42Oh!
14:43No!
14:44Robbie!
14:45I think there might have been some breakage.
14:47Oh, shit.
14:48He's going to be stuck.
14:49This is what we've tuned in for.
14:51The boat is basically wedged underneath this bridge.
14:54Why did he go that far in?
14:56I don't know what I'm going to do.
14:58And they thought the weed was going to be the problem.
15:01Common sense.
15:02Common sense.
15:03Like, why did he not just think, oh, I'm not getting under there.
15:07Take all the stuff off.
15:08He's used all his energies on knocking up his own muesli.
15:11Yeah.
15:12I have to call my friend Jamie.
15:13He lives locally with his family.
15:15And he helped me the other day, so I'm hoping he can help me again.
15:19Unless he's fucking Superman or something.
15:21I imagine turning up to that and going, what the fuck do you want me to do?
15:27Yeah.
15:28Why have you called me?
15:29Well, because you're a mate and I know you live local.
15:31You know, I work in an office.
15:34He came down, jumped on the front of the boat adding a bit more weight.
15:39He jumped way out?
15:41Does he?
15:42That gave us just enough room with Jamie on the front to get the boat underneath the bridge.
15:47Wow.
15:48And he's through.
15:49Oh, thank God, that was real, that was touch and go then.
15:53Thanks for rescuing me.
15:55Thanks, Jamie.
15:56See ya.
15:57Is this actually a show?
15:58Yeah.
15:59Yeah.
16:00I'll be honest with you, he's not done a good job of showing you how good a life could be
16:03on a little narrowboat.
16:04No.
16:05What he has done is show you what it's really like.
16:07No.
16:08He has, you need to eat food out of boxes, you get stuck under barangies.
16:12You know the way television works.
16:14It was all X-factored and made to look more interesting than what it was.
16:18That was more interesting.
16:19Yes.
16:20In South London.
16:23How's your pizza oven?
16:24I ain't used it yet.
16:26What?
16:27This time I'm going to use it.
16:28Got friends Mo and Baba Tunday.
16:30Have you ever made a pizza before?
16:32Yeah, when I was in like food tech in school.
16:34Food tech?
16:35Oh, but did you buy the pizza base or did you make it?
16:38No.
16:39So we would make that actual pizza base.
16:42I ain't doing that though.
16:43No?
16:44I'm just going to get some pizzas.
16:46Like Chicago town jets and just chuck them in the pizza oven.
16:49I ain't got time for that bro.
16:50Who's doing that man?
16:54I think my name is Papa John or something bro.
16:58Oh God I nearly choked.
16:59No bro.
17:00Don't do that man.
17:01You can't.
17:02Yeah bro.
17:03I ain't got time for that bro.
17:04You're going to cook frozen pizzas in the pizza oven.
17:06Yeah but I'm doing it outside innit?
17:08On Tuesday night another punter was pretending to be someone they're not on channel 5.
17:17Oh I loved it.
17:18Do you remember faking it?
17:19Yeah.
17:20I used to love faking it.
17:21I imagine we'd be quite good at this because we've both winged careers for the past 15 years.
17:25Oh yeah I am Robin 11 name it.
17:27Oh tell me about it.
17:28Craig Murphy is 34 years old, born and raised in the Highlands of Scotland.
17:33Little dins like me.
17:35He runs his own painting and decorating company.
17:37Wait he wears a decorating kiln?
17:39I love that he wears a decorating kiln.
17:41You don't want to see him up a ladder?
17:42No.
17:43He's going to be leaving his family behind and stepping into London's glitzy world of fashion
17:49makeup.
17:50I think if you're good at painting.
17:52Yeah.
17:53It's similar.
17:54It depends if he's a good painter and decorator.
17:56Yeah.
17:57Cause a lot of them aren't.
17:58Hello buddy.
17:59And he's after some cheese.
18:03Would you, would you do my makeup?
18:04All you've got to do with faking it really I think is learn the lingo.
18:07I think you mentioned cheekbones a bit.
18:10Yeah.
18:11And blusher.
18:12Let's lift them up a bit.
18:13Yeah.
18:14Blusher.
18:15Lip liner.
18:16Yeah.
18:17Lip liner.
18:18Exactly the same as a skirting board.
18:19First things first, does Craig even know what's in the bottles?
18:23What is this?
18:24No idea.
18:25This Craig guy.
18:26He's like, what's in this?
18:27He's like, make up.
18:28Yeah.
18:29Yeah.
18:30What about this?
18:31Mascara.
18:32Mascara.
18:33Blusher.
18:34Oh he ain't got a clue.
18:35It's going to be a long day Craig.
18:37What about this?
18:38Blusher.
18:39Bronzer.
18:40Oh just tell him, don't ask him the question.
18:43Just tell him.
18:44What's the point of a quiz for a man who's never been in a makeup shop?
18:47What's the point?
18:48What's this?
18:49Another box.
18:50Yes.
18:51Howard wants him to apply makeup on a real model so he can see how he gets on.
18:55Here we go.
18:56Oh he's so nervous.
18:57Look at him.
18:58Get in there.
18:59Chucked in at the deep end.
19:00Yeah yeah but he's got good people around him so let's see.
19:02No you need more than good people around you.
19:04Let's see.
19:05Er.
19:06Oh.
19:07Come on Craig.
19:09I don't know who I'm more nervous for, Craig or the girl?
19:13Yeah.
19:14Oh God.
19:15I'm shaking.
19:16Oh.
19:17He's holding it like a paintbrush isn't he?
19:20Yeah.
19:21Could you open your eyes please?
19:22Oh.
19:23Oh God.
19:24Look at him.
19:25Oh my God.
19:26Look at him.
19:27Oh my God.
19:28Fuck me it's Alice Cooper.
19:31But hang on.
19:32It's his first attempt.
19:33He's got four weeks.
19:34Yeah he's got four weeks.
19:35I feel like Howard and I can do a few extra tweaks to your appearance.
19:40Oh the mayor Corbett.
19:41The mayor Corbett.
19:42The mayor Corbett.
19:43I'm just working the bleach.
19:45Oh no.
19:46I knew it.
19:47I knew.
19:48Straight for the eyebrows.
19:49We're going to give you a tash because I think tashes are cool.
19:52Wait he's just going to make him look like him.
19:53No don't shave his wee ginger beard.
19:54I like his beard.
19:55Don't get rid of that.
19:56Just dye it.
19:57It's different.
19:58Yeah.
19:59See different.
20:00It's good.
20:01It's good.
20:02He hates it.
20:03Course he does.
20:04I used to have a tash like that.
20:05You know it curls up at the end.
20:06Do you know the best thing to use.
20:07Because wax.
20:08The problem with wax is it starts to drop.
20:09So the trick is use Pritt stick.
20:10No.
20:11Yeah.
20:12Because it dries hard it doesn't drop and it washes out easy.
20:13So you used a Pritt stick your tash.
20:14I used to Pritt stick my tash.
20:15After being rebranded as Murphy the makeup artist painter and decorator Craig had to convince
20:20the judges he was the real deal.
20:22He's competing against three makeup artists who have over ten years of experience between
20:23them.
20:24None of whom have a moustache.
20:25In the next hour the four makeup artists will need to complete their punk couture look.
20:26What does punk couture look.
20:27I don't know.
20:28We've got three judges in there.
20:29That's intense man.
20:30Pritt stick.
20:31Next it's the eyes.
20:32I don't know.
20:33Do you use a Pritt stick your tash.
20:34Do you use a Pritt stick your tash.
20:35I use a Pritt stick my tash.
20:36I use a Pritt stick my tash.
20:37After being rebranded as Murphy the makeup artist painter and decorator Craig had to convince
20:38the judges he was the real deal.
20:39He's competing against three makeup artists who have over ten years of experience between them.
20:42None of whom have a moustache.
20:44In the next hour the four makeup artists will need to complete their punk couture look.
20:48What does punk couture look.
20:49I don't know but three judges in there that's intense man.
20:53Next it's the eyes.
20:55Oh the eyeliner.
20:56No no no wait.
20:57Eyeliner.
20:58This was where he messed up before.
20:59But can Craig keep his nerves at bay.
21:01Come on Craig.
21:02It's shaking a bit though isn't it.
21:05Okay.
21:06No saying that you've done.
21:08Okay you'll make you be more confident Craig.
21:11Come on.
21:12You've got bleached eyebrows.
21:13So talk us through look what are you creating here.
21:16Oh here we go.
21:17Come on this is where you've got to blag it Murphy.
21:19This is where you've got to blag it.
21:20Talk it.
21:21Talk it.
21:22I'm gonna have a messy eye.
21:23That'll be the pinky part.
21:25He's learned the bullshit.
21:26Yeah.
21:27Just a little bit of product on the skin.
21:29Products is good.
21:30Would you like some products?
21:31Do you want some products?
21:32I've got some free product for you.
21:34Do you want some products?
21:35Not just the lashes.
21:36Just so it looks like there's.
21:38He knows.
21:39He knows.
21:40Oh I think he's trying really hard.
21:42Perfect.
21:43But I don't think MD's convinced.
21:45I don't think MD's buying it Craig.
21:47So it feels very 1980s I think.
21:49He's got like the lip and the strong eyes.
21:51That feels like very 1980s punk.
21:53I'll tell you what though.
21:54He's ain't bad.
21:55He's doing a great job hasn't he?
21:57He's cracking.
21:58The lip and the eye are really quite strong.
22:00Yeah.
22:01No.
22:02He looks alright.
22:03It does.
22:04I book him for a glam and gore.
22:06There's one makeup artist up there who's only had four weeks of training.
22:10Wow.
22:11So they didn't know.
22:12Oh we thought that she cocked.
22:14Oh mate.
22:15I think the MUA who probably had the least amount of experience was probably Becky.
22:19Yes.
22:20It's not Becky.
22:21Oh my gosh.
22:22Wow.
22:23That's one down.
22:24Come on one more.
22:25So they've already got one in the bag.
22:26Yeah yeah yeah.
22:27Come on Craig you just need one more.
22:28Maybe the person that's been doing makeup for four weeks.
22:31Come on.
22:32This is the decider.
22:33Becky maybe?
22:34Yes.
22:35Yes.
22:36Yes.
22:37Oh leave the radiators behind some.
22:39You've transcended.
22:40What would be your makeup name?
22:42Fernando.
22:43Why Fernando?
22:46I just feel like it sounds like who's done your makeup?
22:49Fernando.
22:50Oh yeah.
22:51Like it's like zesty isn't it?
22:52You've got to have a sexy name.
22:53Mine would be Teresa.
22:55Oh.
22:56Teresa.
22:57Who's doing your lip?
22:59Teresa.
23:00In Cheshire.
23:01Have you ever, like when me and you were talking.
23:16War from Bolt.
23:17Right.
23:18I think we sound alright but have you ever heard yourself back on Tally and gone.
23:21Oh.
23:22Jesus.
23:23Oh.
23:24Good mates Paddy and Vernon.
23:26It's next level isn't it?
23:27There's one.
23:28Hello there.
23:29Yeah.
23:30There's one clip that just sends a shiver down my spine.
23:33I only did it once.
23:34I did Top of the Pops and I always wanted to do Top of the Pops.
23:36And I did Top of the Pops and the opening link.
23:39Hey mum.
23:40Let's pray and record on video.
23:42I'm actually hosting Top of Pops.
23:44Oh.
23:45Am I?
23:46Yeah.
23:47Yeah.
23:48Oh it's so broad.
23:49Yeah.
23:50To be fair though, it's not the worst thing that's ever happened on Top of the Pops over
23:53the years.
23:54Yeah.
23:58On Wednesday night, there are only four globetrotting teams left.
24:02All trying to come first on BBC One.
24:05Your favourite's on.
24:06Oh I love Race Across the World.
24:07That's good isn't it?
24:08You love it.
24:09That's what you're watching at the moment.
24:10I love Race Across the World.
24:11And we're watching it now.
24:12Hello buddy.
24:14I've got vegan cocktail sausages for work.
24:20Are you talking to me?
24:21Yeah.
24:22I'm sorry.
24:23I couldn't work out if you're talking to me.
24:24The dog.
24:27I think beats.
24:28No mummy.
24:29We'd get lost.
24:30We'd be so bad.
24:31No.
24:32We could do this.
24:33Because I'm really good at travelling.
24:34I think I'd be alright.
24:36I think it would be okay.
24:37I think you'd be alright.
24:38You've just got to go really fast across the world haven't you?
24:41Yeah but we'd have to stop quite a lot for you to cry.
24:44Why is it sad?
24:45Well no but it doesn't have to be.
24:46It doesn't have to be sad for you to cry.
24:48Sorry are you okay there?
24:49Have a look.
24:52Cute.
24:53I know I thought so too.
24:54How do you do it?
24:55This is for you.
24:57Thank you so much.
24:58As Brian and Melvin were first to reach the checkpoint.
25:01They're now first to leave.
25:03So these two are brothers but they sort of drifted apart.
25:05They don't really hang out.
25:07And then this trip is them like getting their brotherhood back together.
25:11That's nice but like surely stressful enough.
25:13It's the worst place to do it.
25:14Yeah.
25:15Just six and a half hours separate the brothers and last place.
25:18They're in front.
25:19The old chuckle brothers.
25:20Less than six and a half hours to make up.
25:22You could do that.
25:23It could all change.
25:24It could all change in a day.
25:25Are you ready?
25:26Yeah.
25:27Go on.
25:28Your seventh checkpoint is Panagy.
25:30Never heard of Panagy.
25:32Almost 1500 kilometres south of Sasangir.
25:35Oh.
25:36How stunning.
25:37Forget the racing.
25:38Go on your holiday.
25:39That looks well good.
25:40The decision we've got to make is do we go back on ourselves using the same route or do we cut across the bay?
25:50We can't go under it.
25:51No.
25:52We can't go over it.
25:53We have to go through it.
25:56Remember that book?
25:57Splish splosh.
25:58Splish splosh.
25:59Splish splosh.
26:00Splish splosh.
26:01This is the grown version boy.
26:04They could opt for a ferry but with only two crossings a day.
26:08Timing the connection is key.
26:10Oh.
26:11I don't like boats.
26:12Get the ferry.
26:13Mumbai is one of the busiest cities in India.
26:17Beat, beat, blah, blah, smog, smog.
26:19You don't want to go to Mumbai.
26:21Hmm.
26:22Yeah.
26:23I mean you'd avoid Mumbai when you're under traffic and all the rest of it.
26:25It's mental there.
26:26I feel like Brian's the one in charge.
26:27See if Brian just straight away is in there like we're not going to Mumbai.
26:30No.
26:31Melvin's vibes.
26:32Yeah.
26:33Brian's just like.
26:34Decision made up.
26:35Boom.
26:36Let's go.
26:37Brains and vibes.
26:38After catching the last ferry of the day, Brian and Melvin are the only team to have made
26:40it off the peninsula.
26:42Fucking hell.
26:43Look how far ahead they are.
26:44Them lot are still on the other side of India pretty much.
26:48My gut feeling is that we're still ahead at the moment.
26:51We didn't see anybody else on the ferry and we've got to capitalise on that.
26:55Job done.
26:56Yes.
26:57Job done.
26:58Job did.
26:59What is it?
27:00They're actually smashing their life out of this isn't it?
27:01Yeah.
27:02I don't think it's worth going to the ferry.
27:04Plotting their route.
27:06Caroline and Tom have found a 15 hour bus.
27:0915 hour bus.
27:10Oh I'd rather eat my own foot.
27:13At last we're on the go.
27:14On the move.
27:15On the way to Mumbai.
27:16I wouldn't want to be on the bus.
27:18Nah.
27:19A sweaty bus.
27:20For 15 hours.
27:21Where have we ever watched this?
27:22We're just watching people take public transport.
27:24After an 11 hour bus.
27:31Humid isn't it?
27:32Sticky.
27:33Brian and Melvin have arrived in Panaji.
27:36They've made it.
27:37Jesus.
27:38How far ahead are these two?
27:39By tuk-tuk or taxi, travel to the Checkpoint Hotel.
27:42The Grand Hyatt.
27:43Oh hello.
27:44Isn't that gorgeous?
27:45Lovely.
27:46We're going the Grand Hyatt.
27:47How much mate?
27:48Five.
27:49Yeah.
27:50Good lad.
27:52Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
27:53Good lad.
27:54Good lad.
27:55Good lad.
27:56They're wasting money though.
27:57£4.92 for a tuk-tuk.
27:58That's fine.
27:59London, it's like £7 a minute.
28:01I know.
28:02But you get the music on the ones in London, don't you?
28:04Yeah.
28:05Are we going to be first?
28:06Are we going to be second?
28:07Are we going to be third or what?
28:08I don't know.
28:09I don't see what we could have done any better.
28:11Why has Melvin got a scarf on when it's very humid?
28:16He's committed to his accessories, Pete, and you've got to admire that.
28:20Wow, this looks a bit special, doesn't it?
28:22Lovely view.
28:23It is lovely, isn't it?
28:24Oh, if you walked in and saw someone else, I'd be fuming.
28:26Yeah, yeah, yeah.
28:27Well, at least you're an old lady.
28:28It's true.
28:30Here you go, Mel.
28:32See ya.
28:33See ya.
28:34Are they going to be first?
28:35Is them directing in the book?
28:36All right, let's find out.
28:37No, they've done it.
28:38They've done it.
28:39You ready?
28:40Yeah.
28:42Oh!
28:43What?
28:44Oh!
28:45Look!
28:46One, two, three.
28:47The last!
28:48I don't know how we've done that.
28:49Oh, bollocks.
28:50Oh, no.
28:51How have they gone from first to last?
28:54Do you know what it was?
28:55The ferry.
28:56The ferry!
28:5717 hours earlier.
28:58Do you know how late that is?
29:00You are late.
29:01Not even black people come that late, boy.
29:02You are so late.
29:03Come to the left.
29:04Go to the left.
29:05Hold down, Travis.
29:06Come on, keep going.
29:07I mean, they are running.
29:08Yeah.
29:09Okay.
29:10You ready?
29:11Yeah.
29:12Bosh.
29:13What a moment.
29:14Oh, my God!
29:15Oh, I bet they smell a bit.
29:16Oh, God, yeah.
29:17I bet they're a bit stinky now.
29:18It is what it is.
29:19We're not despondent.
29:20We'll get out there for the eighth leg and we'll hammer it, won't we?
29:21We'll give it the best shot.
29:22You tell them, Melvin.
29:23You tell them, mate.
29:24What do you think their undoing was?
29:25Do you think it was the fact?
29:26Because they were first.
29:27I'll be honest with you.
29:28I think it was...
29:29I think Melvin was starting him down carrying that great big suitcase.
29:30We don't know what's in it, but the way he's carrying it, it looks like a body.
29:32It's all of his accessories.
29:33Yeah, it's all the hats and scarves he's got in there.
29:34In Essex...
29:35I think you're going to have a face now.
29:36I need Sammy.
29:37I just need, like...
29:38You keep moaning.
29:39That's what you keep doing.
29:40A little lift, yeah.
29:41A little lift, yeah.
29:42A little lift, yeah.
29:43A little lift, yeah.
29:44A little lift, yeah.
29:45A little lift, yeah.
29:46A little lift, yeah.
29:47A little lift, yeah.
29:48A little lift, yeah.
29:49A little lift, yeah.
29:50A little lift, yeah.
29:51I think you're going to have a facelift.
29:52I need Sammy.
29:53I just need, like...
29:54You keep moaning.
29:55That's what you keep doing.
29:56A little lift, yeah.
29:57Look, I just need the tiny bit there.
29:59Yeah, but that's a facelift, Mum.
30:00Then that be my neck.
30:01That's a facelift.
30:02Rylan and his mum, Linda.
30:04Have your face done.
30:05Have your nose done.
30:06Have your tits done.
30:07No, I'm not...
30:08Right.
30:09The tits...
30:10No, what?
30:11It's a no-no.
30:12Why?
30:13Because when I...
30:14When we wait, I lose weight a lot.
30:15Yeah, well, you won't lose them if you have your tits done.
30:17I don't want my tits like that.
30:18No-one's going near them.
30:19Oh.
30:20Just get your face and nose done, then, if you want them done.
30:23No.
30:24Might get a buy one, get one free.
30:25Yeah, well, what's that be?
30:27Well, buy the face, get the nose done free.
30:29No.
30:30On Tuesday night, Big Zoo was travelling the world
30:33on the hunt for more fancy dinners.
30:36Do you know what?
30:37I do the majority of cooking in our house.
30:40Yeah?
30:41Do you?
30:42You get involved.
30:43I get involved every now and again.
30:45Like, Tess is primarily the cook.
30:48Yeah.
30:49I do get involved, but not as often as I should.
30:51Sous chef.
30:52Yeah.
30:53Do you remember the worst meal you ever made me?
30:54I used to be good, bro.
30:55You never used to be good.
30:56I think I just got lazy.
30:57You never used to be good.
30:58I did used to be good.
30:59You didn't.
31:00I remember I came home from school once,
31:01you made me spaghetti bolognese.
31:02Yeah.
31:03You know what your secret ingredient was?
31:04What?
31:05Peanut butter.
31:06Oh, yeah, that one didn't work.
31:07Welcome to the world of ludicrous luxury.
31:09Oh, my.
31:10Dave!
31:11I'm searching for the most expensive dishes on the planet.
31:15This is luxury food.
31:17High-end food.
31:18And joining me on this super rich safari
31:20is my cousin and most expensive friend, AJ Tracy.
31:23The mandame have come a long way, you know.
31:25Ah, bro.
31:26They've come a long way.
31:27When they're just trying expensive things
31:28for television entertainment.
31:30They have a bit of everything, aren't they?
31:31Yeah.
31:32Chef, entertainment.
31:33I know.
31:34Now they have cousins.
31:35Literally singing for their super.
31:37This is Big Zoo and AJ Tracy's rich flavours.
31:40Love watching rich flavours
31:41whilst having a salad out of a cardboard bowl.
31:44The best takeaways we have is always the ones,
31:48whenever we go in there and we're like,
31:50oof, looks a bit grim in here.
31:52Yeah, when you can...
31:53You know.
31:54If you ran your finger along the wall,
31:56you'd be able to taste what they've been cooking.
31:58Welcome to America.
32:00The land of big portions and even bigger fortunes.
32:03Are you salivating?
32:04I am a little bit, yeah.
32:05I saw that.
32:06What was that?
32:07Like a little salt beef.
32:08This is New York City.
32:09The richest place on earth.
32:10Yeah, I hadn't got instant ice food when I got to New York.
32:14We were still peasants.
32:15I think I lived on pastrami, yeah.
32:17Sandwich pastrami.
32:18Spaghetti bolognese.
32:19I think it was the poshest I went in some Italian restaurant.
32:23We are here for the most expensive pizza in the world.
32:26I think the most expensive pizza I've ever had though,
32:29I'm like, something like a Domino's.
32:31Do you know what I mean?
32:32The most expensive pizza you've ever had is not Domino's.
32:34Hey mate, sometimes I think they're kind of expensive,
32:36you know, unless you get on the old toe for Tuesday.
32:38Is that the certificate there?
32:40Oh my knees.
32:41Go on, I'll choose it.
32:42They've got it in pounds as well for them, haven't they?
32:45Gordon Ramsay.
32:46He had the previous one.
32:48Two grand.
32:49Blinkin' nowhere.
32:50They've got a Guinness World Record.
32:52Just for ripping evil off.
32:55I mean, what's in it?
32:56Do you get like a watch with it?
32:58We need to know what the pepperoni they're putting on this ting.
33:01I don't like that dough.
33:02That's great.
33:03Indian squid ink for the dough.
33:05Squid ink.
33:06The ink that squids use to defend himself.
33:09When did we start eating that?
33:11Wow.
33:12Do you think that's going to look better when it's cooked?
33:14And that three continent mashup is just the base.
33:17He's putting a Kraft slice on.
33:19Oh, it's gold.
33:20Oh, it's gold.
33:21I want a real Kraft cheese slice.
33:24Round here, gold ain't just for investing,
33:27it's also for digesting.
33:29That's so silly.
33:30That would be a red flag for me.
33:32Who wants to eat foil?
33:34It's so obnoxious, I hate things like this.
33:36I've never been so angry at a pizza.
33:37It's the first time I've been furious at carbohydrates.
33:40It's about to get even madder.
33:42Chef Jonathan's slapping on Caspian caviar.
33:45Some sort of edible flowers.
33:47What a weird vibe, man.
33:48What a weird vibe.
33:49Right, go on.
33:50My favourite pizza toppings, go.
33:51If you were about to tell me this will be the end of our friendship.
33:54No, I know what you're going to say.
33:55If you were about to fuck it.
33:56I know what you're going to say.
33:57Not a chance in hell.
33:58Pineapple.
33:59No way.
34:00Ridiculous.
34:01It's a dessert.
34:02Pervert behaviour.
34:03And the basic battery of expensive dishes.
34:06French truffles.
34:07And of course, more gold.
34:10It's not okay, man.
34:11It's not okay at all.
34:12It's not okay.
34:13Mate, I'll tell you now.
34:15That looks like the worst thing I've ever seen.
34:17You really want to make it expensive?
34:19Put Lurpak on there.
34:20Aye.
34:21Then I'll be like shocked.
34:22Whoa.
34:23Half a tub of Lurpak.
34:24I see that.
34:25Lurpak?
34:26Yeah, yeah, yeah.
34:27You've got money, bro.
34:34I don't think he likes it.
34:36What's that, Link?
34:37I spent on a journey.
34:38He hates it.
34:39I don't like it, does he?
34:40Instantaneous garlic.
34:41Then the umami of everything comes in.
34:44The caviar.
34:45Wow.
34:46I can see why you might enjoy it.
34:48Yeah, I can.
34:49I can see that.
34:50You've got to enjoy it, aren't you?
34:51Yeah, yeah.
34:52Favourite food after three.
34:53Okay.
34:54Three, two, one.
34:55Sushi.
34:56Turkey Chicken Kievs.
34:58Turkey Chicken Kievs?
35:00You know the little mini you've ever had in the turkey balls?
35:03They're frozen.
35:04No.
35:05Okay, so what about sushi?
35:06You like sushi?
35:07I don't mind sushi.
35:08Just don't like the sauce of the wasabi or anything.
35:10Just give me just plain fish.
35:12Bin yourself.
35:13Get in the bin, man.
35:15You're crazy.
35:17Grow up.
35:18You're a parent.
35:19What?
35:20What do we do?
35:21Oh my God.
35:22You're raising beige kids.
35:24Yeah.
35:25Aren't you?
35:26Yeah.
35:27You are, man.
35:28They eat like me.
35:29They eat like...
35:30Bearing in mind, my daughter said to me,
35:31oh, not this time too spicy,
35:33watch with the ketchup.
35:36Oh my God.
35:37Someone save George's kids.
35:39Oh, my God.
35:40I've got such cold as absolutely...
35:41Oh no.
35:42Oh no.
35:43Caught it off your father.
35:44I'm trying to do that thing which is not sighing.
35:46Jennifer and her daughter Beattie.
35:48And I've noticed as you get older, every time you get up you go, oh, oh, oh, oh.
35:50oh.
35:51Like that.
35:52Yeah.
35:53caught it off your father i'm trying to do that thing which is not sighing jennifer and her daughter
35:59beatty and i've noticed as you get older every time you get up you go oh oh like that yeah and
36:06i think if you don't do it you maybe don't feel so tired or so ill this this is the kind of advice
36:14you always give and never say it's like when um no it's like when you told us you could get rid
36:19of bees by saying thursday now that was joanna told me that thursday thursday thursday i think
36:27what it is is it stops you going that's you thanks on monday night it was all about keeping storm on
36:37you and dave if someone's used to meet jace olaf yeah you would you would no i think i'm really
36:44good at just being like like i'm too competitive inside here is a studio audience we've given them
36:51a quarter of a million pounds for doing absolutely nothing what is already one 250 grand well they've
36:57got 250 grand but it goes down okay it's one of those anytime anyone makes a noise it costs them
37:04i think if there's that much money on the line and you're that many people i could compose myself
37:10surely i'd be awful at this you know yeah i would i the budget would be done in 10 minutes mate
37:1810 minutes man
37:23i think this is a really clever show can i have another frutella yes of course you can
37:28remember when you couldn't laugh in assembly and something would be like two out of ten funny
37:32if someone did it in assembly where you can't laugh it is excruciating we start the game in
37:41look they're getting all their noise out
37:46that actually can't say nothing listen do me a favor pretend you're in the audience okay
37:50oh
38:00did anyone make any noise 5 000 pounds lost
38:03oh for that that's it mate oh it's hard it's cost you five grand she's gone all the way to the studio
38:11sat in this chair
38:15someone does a beggar
38:20the person i really need to speak to right now is sarah hey sarah
38:25c57 sarah oh she can't talk can she so what's your mum's name
38:32just doing well no you don't tell me because we know it's karen isn't it
38:36dermot there trying to freak him out trying to derren brown
38:40i'm not going to say she's got derren brown in hi sarah is that her mom is that her mom
38:47it's karen
38:49any secrets about sarah she doesn't know let's hear it karen karen is a snake
38:55you're adopted
38:57live
38:58fucking hell i was tied in a bedroom once because she's really quite swuffy oh no
39:04and uh i found um a sex toy in a bag no no karen you did not classic
39:14absolutely classic did your mom find your dodo
39:19from here on in uh you have the power to skip answers any time you like oh i don't know if
39:24if you're starting with sex toy it can only get worse oh god
39:30oh skip that yeah i don't want to know that bro oh they're asking her mum that no skip skip
39:41plate several times um several times just straight in there straight in
39:50not even a um well just several times several times once on a pedalo in italy a pedalo in italy
40:00on a pedalo what in the middle of the ocean on the pen hey does she work that out
40:05oh kid no it's like you still fall in and then um also in some bushes in like almost like a traffic
40:12island a traffic island jesus having it off on a roundabout god that is public no skip it
40:21skip it i don't know if this is worth 250 grand uh next question please there's more
40:27more oh man favorite sexual position oh no this is unnecessary well i'll be honest with you claire
40:37i sort of want to know doggy not sure i want to answer this but it's got to do with dogs
40:43she's what she's having sex with dogs is she on about a bloke who looked like a dog or something
40:49no i don't mean i'm doing it with the dog i mean
40:54basically now karen i'd have to leave i'd leave and then immediately move to
41:00i don't know papa new guinea yeah just leave i mean doggy position how did you guess that
41:11she's in vet dogging no no dogging no well you do know something what i don't know
41:18what is she on the bed nothing joe i got nothing from sarah she's tough as nails that one because she's
41:25grown up with a mother that's done it on a pedalo you kids are right on the sand i'm just off on the
41:33pedalo i'm just off with with one on the pedalo's in north london i got told this week by a medical
41:46professional to go and do some exercise because he used the phrase at your age
41:51what do you mean which is the first time i've ever heard that i was like my my age nick and his
41:58niece live but yeah i went to see i went to have like a full um mlt yeah whole thing moles blood
42:08heart blood pressure cholesterol guess how old my heart is 39 no yeah wait one year younger than you
42:17are yeah so accurate huh accurate no it's better than it should be oh i'm nearly i'm 41 in august
42:26okay my heart's 39 dead young
42:32on friday night it was news of somebody's last day in the office that made the headlines
42:37the itv news it's the news i'm not at the age where i just leave the news on in my house though no no no
42:43that's some real pension and stuff just leave it on all day you know this is itv news at 10
42:53with julie etchingham hey oh boy we go what you got for us julie the past four months donald trump
42:58and elon musk have been largely inseparable they have yeah they've been like the worst
43:03dumb and dumber ever oh they are dumb and dumber yeah i love some do you know that he's a fool and
43:08he's fucking up my children's future and the world the president has often had his self-styled
43:13first buddy hovering to one side they're literally joined at the hip now aren't they no they've split
43:18up oh have they yeah what happened um his car sales declined by 49 in europe and i suddenly i think he
43:26suddenly realized himself hello maybe donald trump isn't good for business abroad and so it was this
43:31evening in a press conference call to mark the tech billionaire's departure from the white house
43:36there fuck off you little knob i which one both of them but honestly elon musk gives me anxiety
43:44because somebody with that much money behaving like that with just no self-awareness i truly find
43:49terrifying mr musk was sporting a black eye in the oval office today sporting a black eye sporting a black
43:56eye i might support a black eye tomorrow he blamed that on a play fight with one of his children
44:02bigger his children even by his own eccentric standards the world's richest man cut an unusual
44:07figure in the oval office today he's an alien yeah i think he's an alien he's an alien i swear to god
44:14bro i think he's an alien bro and i don't know where to start i'll be honest i feel bad i feel bad even
44:19saying it but enough look at it a question about his alleged regular drug taking reported in today's new
44:27york times here you go hey oh what kind of drugs has elon musk been taking ketamine he's what he's on
44:34ketamine doesn't make him a bad person elon musk hinted he was still open to helping president trump
44:42so it's not his last day though i think he'll just kind of work on a freelance basis now yeah just whenever
44:47he wants to his odyssey into politics yes was at times like a pantomime what is that that's a
44:57chainsaw that's dangerous sad oh you told me that person's not on ketamine gave him a little special
45:04something we have here always give him a present what would you want on your last day at the white
45:08house a flowers i love flowers or a plant oh a nice house place yeah yeah that would be lovely that
45:16word thank you a sign of his affection came as elon musk was about to leave today oh a gold key a
45:23giant key a key to the white house oh let yourself in he was given this golden goodbye thank you thank you
45:31take care of that smile all right bye now okay no no you you can off now we've fallen out publicly
45:42before but i think i think we we were we were a lot more graceful than that weren't we a lot more
45:46graceful but you never gave me a golden key he never gave me a black eye we have to affect
45:54the things that we can affect we can't affect that we can moan about it and if he comes here we can get
45:59out of the streets and show him how much we hate him but really we've got to get on and make sure
46:05it doesn't happen here make sure that that great talking sewage pipe farage doesn't get in
46:19you just look like it's just a pipe a great big sewage pipe of hate
46:29the car so liam neeson he's an expert assassin who's about to become the target memory the network
46:37premiere tomorrow at 9 30 here in channel 4 and that channel 4 is now home of the uefa under 21
46:43championships it kicks off with slovakia as they take on spain live this wednesday at 4 50
46:49where we're on 47 but back to tonight and how open is everyone feeling

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