Comedian Vinnie Brand on The John DeBella Show

Beasley Digital

Transcript

00:00Vinnie Brand or as my fans refer to me Giggless Vinnie Brand so how are things I mean we literally

00:27haven't spoken to you in eight months you haven't been here since Christmas it's unbelievable

00:31there's been a long absence for me it's been a peaceful time in my life and I don't know why

00:36why haven't I been here I have no idea maybe it's because you opened up a second comedy club

00:41I did I opened up a second club and and big news everybody this is the big I waited to say this

00:48okay all morning John my wife is pregnant stop no this joke again no this joke again no no you've

00:54done this joke before she doesn't know it yet don't tell her yet all week I'm like I haven't

01:06done that joke for John Christmas she's very mad at me she says you're cursing us I'm gonna get

01:12pregnant I'm like no I guarantee you that's impossible I remember my biology class there's

01:17no private time for us there's too many people in the house how many kids now six kids six one's

01:22going to college oh going to University of Michigan okay in two weeks and now now is that is that the

01:28the soccer daughter runner she's a runner she's a runner okay all right all right you're sure she was

01:33a soccer kid right now I like the running better than soccer because you go you watch the event you go

01:39home thank you guys go no fighting parents no all right no soccer is you know I coach a little

01:47five-year-old right so this year my my little one is playing and I know this guy he got his kid on my

01:53team I've known the guy forever so we're like day five and he comes up to me dead serious he goes

01:59listen man you got to get on my kid I go what he's yeah he's not taking this seriously enough

02:04hey look at Michael Barry trust me just give it time this will suck in about two years just give

02:10it time and I just let him enjoy it right now he wants me to yell at his five-year-old

02:15what is wrong with people the country's out of control get on my kid he has five years old

02:21you think he's gonna be a soccer superstar his future options still involve a conviction don't

02:27worry let the kid get through sesame place for god's sake i can't take it speaking of sesame

02:35place uh this is usually the time of the year you go on the big family vacation does that happen

02:39already i we went we were gonna go listen to this we're gonna go to europe for my daughter's

02:44summer trip we're gonna go to europe ambitious okay and i'm like all right we'll go to europe i'll

02:48go i'll go to anywhere in europe except countries that might blow up all right so there's like nine or

02:53ten countries i won't go to i'll go to ireland i'll go to sweden not even sweden anymore i'll go

02:59i'll go to ireland and uh so i'm all geared up to go and i i got my mental head around spending a ton

03:06of money all right and my wife comes in she goes yeah i switched the trip up a little bit we're gonna

03:11go to ocean city new jersey yeah what yeah ocean city new jersey and that's where we went and it's i

03:20like ocean city okay it's a decent boardwalk okay it's not quite uh it's nice it it there's a

03:27decided lack of scumbags on the boardwalk at ocean city okay so you go to seaside heights it's like

03:33oh man yeah film an episode of cops here and wildwood's the same thing i would like you know

03:39pick your life in your hands go to the go-karts wear a ball-proof vest bad boardwalk all right so

03:44it's nasty the amount of gum on the wildwood boardwalk alone so i said to people really

03:50you couldn't hit one of the 57 garbage cans all around you at all times the gum has to hit the

03:55boardwalk how what would make her change from a european vacation the ocean city i think it was

04:01isis uh i don't know i don't know that's where we ended up going and it rained three of the seven

04:08days i'm like this is the worst vacation in the history of vacations um in new jersey which is not a

04:13vacation i'm i'm an hour from new jersey right right exactly but there was a lot of irish kids

04:20that come to ocean city to work so i felt like i was in europe a little bit okay a little bit all

04:26right all right all right so anything else new with the family all right so here's here's what's new

04:31uh there's a lot of new stuff i have my 20-year wedding anniversary okay all right now what did

04:36you do for your 20-year wedding anniversary what did i do for my 20-year anniversary i cooked dinner

04:42for my wife and uh bought flowers and stuff and that was really about it that's why you'll never

04:49have a seventh child this is what i did this is what i did all right so i went out and i got my

04:59wife an eternity ring okay when i went to tiffany's drop some coin okay all right then i took her out

05:05uh into our property you've been in my house yeah so i went out to the field there the same spot on

05:11the field where 21 years ago i showed her the property and said i think we can make a nice home

05:15here and she was like oh my god i think we can make a home here i brought her out there i got

05:20down on one knee and i asked her to marry me again that's right or wrong okay women in the audience

05:26today right or wrong okay yeah and she said no and she said yes and then she gave me my gift which

05:3420 years you're waiting for right 20 years is big i mean you got an eternity ring yeah i got an

05:39eternity ring i'm looking for maybe one of those three-wheel motorcycles

05:42i hate you for that i hate them tickets to the lion king

05:48she got herself a gift for you for herself

05:53on the same day the red sox were playing the yankees i can't wait to tell the fellas

06:07what happened cats were sold out i mean jesus

06:12lion king it's the only broadway show on groupon

06:15i said like do you like it i'm like yeah i love it you're the girl i want to marry again

06:20oh my god

06:22worst shit ever

06:24you

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