Staring at pigeon badonkadonk - Denise Taylor - video Dailymotion

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Transcript

00:00I had a guy friend tell me the other day that he doesn't want to approach women in person anymore

00:04because he's afraid of coming off as a creep.

00:06And when he said that to me, I was like,

00:08can you please not smell my hair while you explain it, you know?

00:12But I didn't believe him, you know?

00:14I was like, why would anyone do that?

00:15Like, why would someone accuse you of being weird if that's not what's in your heart?

00:19You know, I just didn't think it was a real energy that existed in the world, you know?

00:23Until later that night, I was walking home alone

00:26and there was a pigeon walking, like, five feet in front of me.

00:32And yeah, I don't know if you've ever walked behind a pigeon for, like, an extended period of time,

00:37but they do make you feel weird about it.

00:44Like, I wasn't even looking at this particular pigeon.

00:47All of a sudden, he started accelerating kind of out of nowhere, you know, when they do that thing.

00:51But, like, not crossing the street just yet, but, like, giving me these, like, darting glances,

00:55like, I'm gonna do something to him, you know?

00:59And I was like, I don't even look at you that way, but now I am staring.

01:02I'm staring at his giant badonkadonk.

01:04Like, I don't want to be in this position, but he's making me feel strange, you know?

01:09So I was like, okay, just relax, you know?

01:11No one thinks you're following this pigeon in, like, a creepy way, you know?

01:15And then he turned a corner, and I'm like, well, I was also gonna turn this same corner.

01:19Like, I'm not gonna detour for a bird, right?

01:21Like, until finally, by the end of it, I became a full-on incel, and I had to be like,

01:26okay, uh, first of all, you're not even the best-looking pigeon on this block, right?

01:32Bye, bye.