Captain Mike Haak

Beasley Digital

Dave & Chuck the Freak talk about a Southwest Airlines pilot who allegedly would pull his donger out on flights and can't help but notice his name, which is Mike Haak.

Transcript

00:00Dave and Chuck the Freaks, pervert of the day.

00:08Pervert of the day?

00:10A Southwest Airlines pilot.

00:15We put a lot of faith in airplane pilots to keep their hands on the controls and not on this.

00:21A guy named Michael Hack, a pilot for Southwest Airlines, is in some trouble.

00:26Turns out, back in August, he was flying from Philadelphia to Orlando when he pulled out his junk in the cockpit.

00:39Just because it's called that doesn't mean you've got to do that.

00:43Now, they're not saying why he did it or what he did with it once it was out.

00:50All we know is it was out and his co-workers saw it.

00:54His name is Mike Hack?

00:56His name is Mike Hack.

01:04That's all I thought.

01:09Have you seen Mike Hack?

01:10Captain.

01:12Captain Mike Hack.

01:14I'm Captain Mike Hack.

01:16Captain Mike Hack.

01:23What do you expect from him?

01:27Oh, man.

01:28Has anyone seen Mike Hack?

01:31We just saw it.

01:32Yeah.

01:35You mean the pilot?

01:36He's now facing charges for committing a lewd act.

01:45He does not fly for Southwest anymore.

01:49Southwest says he actually resigned before they could do anything about the cockpit exposure incident.

01:55But they say they're now cooperating with appropriate outside agencies as they investigate.

02:02So his co-pilot saw it, obviously?

02:05Or maybe a flight attendant if somebody hadn't taken off yet?

02:09I don't know, but his co-pilot saw it right next to him.

02:12Could have been a female co-pilot, too.

02:15This man's slim, but could.

02:17Or he could have been into his male co-pilot.

02:17I don't know.

02:18I knew a girl that became a...

02:19No, I mean, it's possible, but I just...

02:22I don't know.

02:23Why are you pulling it out?

02:25You want to see what my cock looks like?

02:26Yeah.

02:27I do.

02:27I've been to have for a long time.

02:30Let's see if we can...

02:31That it's big.

02:35Everyone's looking for him.

02:36They want to figure out what he looks like.

02:40I mean, it seems make-believe with a name like that.

02:42I know it does.

02:44It's insane.

02:46It's insane.

02:47But, I mean, it's everywhere.

02:48NBC, New York Post.

02:50They all have it, but we can't.

02:52We can't get our finger on my cock.

02:58How could there be no picture of my cock anywhere?

03:03Yeah, it's weird.

03:04That's why it seems more make-believe than...

03:09Southwest Airlines has commented on the story saying that, you know, he...

03:13We expected better from Captain Mykak.

03:18That's crazy.

03:22That's his name.

03:23Yeah.

03:24That is crazy.

03:26It is.

03:27First thing, jump right into my head.

03:29Oh, wait.

03:31Look.

03:32X-Pilot began, continued, and completed Ludact in Air.

03:37Oh, no.

03:38So, he jerked Mykak off.

03:43No, he didn't.

03:44No.

03:45No one did it to him.

03:47No, he jerked himself off.

03:49Yes.

03:51Mykak jerked himself off.

03:53Yes.

03:55Look.

03:55Yeah.

03:56Prosecutors claim it began, continued, and completed while the aircraft was in flight.

04:00So, it just struck him.

04:05Don't trust Mykak.

04:07You know you can't trust Mykak.

04:11Mykak.

04:12That's Mike H-A-A-K.

04:14Yeah.

04:14Mykak.

04:15Michael Hack.

04:16Yes.

04:18Known to his friends as Mike.

04:20Yeah.

04:20Right.

04:21Mike.

04:22Mykak.

04:26Goodness gracious.

04:27Captain Mykak.

04:28Oh, we are infantile.

04:36It's real silly.

04:37There's so much more you could say to make more jokes, but you can't.

04:40I know, but you can't.

04:41You can't.

04:42I'm not even joking.

04:43I'm just saying his name.

04:44It's tough going through life with a name like Mykak.

04:48You know what?

04:49You kind of lived up to it.

04:50It sounds like it gets to you.

04:52You snap one day.

04:54It's on your mind.

04:55Yep.

04:56Southwest really kept this information.

05:00Can you imagine, Chuck, you're a co-pilot.

05:03Yeah.

05:03And I'm Captain Mykak.

05:05Yeah.

05:05And I take it out.

05:06I'm like, dude, please put that away.

05:08And I just like, no, I am horny.

05:12I'm horny right now.

05:13I guess.

05:14Deal with it.

05:16So he's my buddy.

05:17Maybe we do this.

05:18Oh, maybe.

05:19Maybe we are co-pilots.

05:21Maybe we are.

05:22Maybe we are.

05:22Go by the Harry sack.

05:25That's right.

05:26I'm co-pilot Harry, Captain Harry sack.

05:30Maybe I like to come in for a landing.

05:32Yeah.

05:33And I cover for you and you cover for me.

05:35And we've been doing this for years.

05:37We are air jerkers.

05:38But then someone else saw us.

05:40Right.

05:41Like a flight attendant blew the whole thing off.

05:44We've been doing it for years.

05:46Someone said, warning, don't look on the internet for pics of Mykak.

05:49Nope.

05:52You think you, if you're pleasuring yourself, you do it in your pilot voice?

05:58Some of the things would be grunts in a pilot voice.

06:04Yeah.

06:05I mean, that's how they talk.

06:06Give yourself pilot joy.

06:07Yeah.

06:08Sure.

06:10Jerk it.

06:11And he goes, there we go.

06:17Faster.

06:19Faster.

06:20Faster.

06:21Faster.

06:22Faster.

06:23Faster.

06:24Faster.

06:25Faster.

06:26Faster.

06:27Faster.

06:28Faster.

06:29Faster.

06:30Faster.

06:31Faster.

06:32Faster.

06:33Faster.

06:34Faster.

06:35Faster.

06:36Faster.

06:37Faster.

06:38Faster.

06:39Faster.

06:40Faster.

06:41Faster.

06:42Faster.

06:43Faster.

06:44Faster.

06:45Faster.

06:46Faster.

06:47Faster.

Category

Transcript

Recommended