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Petting Zoos: Can We Finally Stop Calling Them Fun?
Proving Ground
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7/24/2024
Category
😹
Fun
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00:00
Petting zoos, can we finally stop calling them fun?
00:04
Petting zoos were always on the short list of budget-friendly things to do on a 1970s Saturday,
00:10
along with matinee movies, skating rinks, mall crawling, and bowling.
00:15
However, the petting zoo was the only option that could end with fecal matter and gauze bandages.
00:21
The main takeaway from petting zoos was that really smelly animals can have bad days, too.
00:26
Petting zoos sounded so good on paper.
00:28
We'd get to spend quality time with domesticated farm animals,
00:32
and they wouldn't have to produce eggs, milk, or meat for a while.
00:37
Win, win.
00:39
But petting zoo residents weren't the usual breed of goat or sheep.
00:43
Endless hours of unsolicited petting had left them bitter and cynical.
00:47
We weren't children to them.
00:49
We were dried corn delivery systems.
00:51
Never let them see the cup.
00:54
I don't blame the captives at a petting zoo for taking the occasional ounce of flesh
00:57
or chewing a random piece of clothing.
01:00
They didn't ask for this assignment,
01:02
and I would probably do the same thing if I were in their position.
01:06
I would hope the vending machines were filled with slices of pizza, though.
01:11
Go ahead and pet me, kid. I've got nothing but time.
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