- 25.7.2025
Kategorie
😹
SpaßTranskript
00:00This was a mistake!
00:04Shut up!
00:05Button?
00:14You're mad.
00:16Wow.
00:30CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
00:35Hello!
00:37Welcome!
00:38Welcome to Taskmaster.
00:40I'm Greg Davies, and for a man my age, I'm as fly as they come.
00:49We're at the penultimate stage of a competition
00:51that will go down in history as being so unimportant
00:54that I doubt any of us that are involved
00:57will even have marked graves.
00:59That said...
01:01LAUGHTER
01:03We're here now, so let's make an effort.
01:06Battling hard for Britain's holoist prize
01:09are...
01:24And next to me, a man that went to private school
01:27and genuinely doesn't like people knowing that.
01:30LAUGHTER
01:31It's little Alex Horne!
01:33It wasn't...
01:34It wasn't my choice.
01:35It wasn't my choice.
01:36APPLAUSE
01:37Hi.
01:38Hello, Greg.
01:39Hi there.
01:40Feeling good?
01:41Yep.
01:42Penultimate show, so I imagine you've prepared something
01:44pretty special for our chat section.
01:46What I just thought...
01:47I'll tell you about my latest routine.
01:48I've been going to the gym three times a week.
01:54What is it?
01:55Let me guess.
01:56You know a man called Jim?
01:57Yeah, exactly.
01:58LAUGHTER
01:59As soon as I said the gym, you knew I was going to have to say Jim.
02:02I did, but...
02:03We all did.
02:04Yeah?
02:05We know you don't go to the gym.
02:06Look at your body.
02:07Yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:08It's horrible.
02:09It's in active collapse.
02:11Yeah.
02:12It's horrible.
02:13Floppy.
02:14It's so white as well.
02:15It's so pale.
02:16Very pale, very pale, yeah.
02:17Yeah.
02:21OK, let's prize task, shall we?
02:23Yes, time to crack on and see what they've brought in
02:25for the category I'm about to think out loud, which is...
02:30The most satisfying thing you could use as a jelly mould.
02:35Yes.
02:37Greggy likes his jelly, Alex likes his jelly,
02:39and Alex likes his Greggy and his Greggy jelly belly.
02:42That's right.
02:44At the end of this episode, one lucky winner...
02:48Genuinely walk away with five prospective jelly moulds.
02:51Can I get a whoop-whoop?
02:53Yes, please.
02:54Well done.
02:55The first poem to ever make me feel physically sick.
02:59Jason!
03:00I think it's pretty self-explanatory.
03:01The best mould would be this.
03:06Does that remind you of anything...
03:07You know, it occurs to me it might be hard to figure out
03:09what it is based on that, so I have them make a jelly
03:13from the mould.
03:14Can we look at that?
03:15Yes.
03:16That's...
03:17That is the real jelly.
03:18Oh, Italian boobs.
03:19It's not Italian boobs in the end.
03:21Those are Irish.
03:22Irish boobs.
03:23Irish.
03:24When Irish boobs are smiling.
03:25Now, my question for you, Greg, is whose boobs are those?
03:29Your mum's.
03:30Are you saying that these boobs belong to someone we might know?
03:35Huh?
03:36Oh.
03:37So it's an Irish person.
03:38The cause?
03:39The cause.
03:40I don't even know who that is.
03:43Oh.
03:44Aisling B.
03:45Show me Aisling B!
03:46Yeah, yeah.
03:47There we go.
03:48It's hers.
03:49Oh!
03:50Wow!
03:54I texted her.
03:55I said, this is the task prize.
03:58Would you be willing to get a plaster mould of your boobs done?
04:01She said, absolutely.
04:02When and where?
04:03No question.
04:04Straight in.
04:05Zero.
04:06Zero questions.
04:07Good.
04:08Thanks for bringing Aisling B's jelly tits.
04:09Who's next?
04:10Stevie.
04:11Very different approach.
04:15So I'm going to set the scene.
04:17OK.
04:18I'm having a party.
04:19It's my party.
04:20You're there.
04:21And we've had the savoury bits, the nibbles, and then I'm like,
04:24do you want some jelly?
04:25And you're like, yeah, but I don't know what sort of flavour.
04:28I, quick as a flash, spoon from behind the ear, hand you a spoon,
04:31hand goes back to just an unobtrusive chest of drawers,
04:34open the top drawer full of jelly.
04:36Here it is.
04:37Three different flavours.
04:38Yeah.
04:39It's a chest of drawers.
04:40Right.
04:41You wouldn't expect it.
04:47What a drawer full of jelly.
04:49What a drawer full of.
04:51That's a great party.
04:52You'd be talking about that for ages after you'd been to that party.
04:54Yeah, I'd be talking about your mental health.
04:56Yeah.
04:57Yeah.
04:58Matthew.
04:59What have you brought?
05:00It's a paddling pool.
05:01Yes, it is.
05:02There it is.
05:03I just thought...
05:05Pop that next to drawers.
05:07It was put your 255 cubic litres of jelly, so volume-wise.
05:11You'd be pretty satisfied if you made that much jelly.
05:14Maybe too.
05:15Yeah, yeah.
05:16It'd be a...
05:17Yeah, I mean, it'd be a big jelly.
05:18Rosie.
05:19I brought me air fryer drawers.
05:21Yes, she has.
05:22Yeah, there you go.
05:24Perfect size.
05:25Still drawers, isn't it?
05:26Yeah, but it's...
05:27LAUGHTER
05:29A smaller drawer.
05:32Yes.
05:33Yeah, cos that's too much and you're never going to set it.
05:35I can take them from the utility room, take them out, put them in the fridge,
05:38wibble-wobble-wibble, they'll come out lush and smooth cos it's like great,
05:41like, non-stick metal.
05:43What are you looking at us out for?
05:45LAUGHTER
05:46Absolutely shit.
05:48LAUGHTER
05:51Fatia.
05:52So, the thing that I brought...
05:53Hey, can we just show it?
05:54Yes.
05:55All right, and then I'll...
05:56You don't want to give me some sort of build-up?
05:57Nah, cos when you see it, you're going to be, like, wicked.
05:59She has brought...
06:00This.
06:01It's...
06:02Oh!
06:03Like, people like feets, innit?
06:06No.
06:07Not really.
06:08No-one wants to eat a jelly in the shape of a foot, Fatia.
06:10Yeah, they do.
06:11Do you know how much someone would pay for me to make a real one of those?
06:15I could buy a house.
06:16LAUGHTER
06:17We're currently witnessing a Reddit forum being created.
06:21LAUGHTER
06:23I've made my decision.
06:24You've made your decision?
06:25Mine can do three meals.
06:26Pardon?
06:27LAUGHTER
06:28APPLAUSE
06:30Mine can do, like, the starter, the main, and then the dessert.
06:33Yes.
06:34Oh, my God, I'm so sustainable.
06:35Yeah, you are.
06:36If only the task had been, bring something in that you can cook
06:39a three-course meal.
06:41LAUGHTER
06:42Satisfying, though, innit?
06:43No, it isn't, Rosie.
06:45And you'll thank me for your one point.
06:47LAUGHTER
06:50Oh!
06:55One point to Rosie Ramsey.
06:56Well done, Rosie.
06:57Two.
06:58Two points to Fatia, correct?
06:59Yeah, I like the scale of the draws.
07:00You can now have three points.
07:01Three to seven.
07:02You know, I'd like to see a jelly that big.
07:03OK.
07:04I'd like to see an even bigger jelly the size of a paddling pool,
07:06but, obviously, someone's going to bare their breasts on television.
07:08Of course I have to give them five points.
07:10Five points to Jason McWilliams!
07:11Jason's it!
07:12APPLAUSE
07:13Right, what's the first proper task, please?
07:17Well, let me show you.
07:20That's strange.
07:21It's, er...
07:22Hmm.
07:23I don't know how...
07:24Fine.
07:25Right, well, here we go.
07:26It's this.
07:27You all right?
07:28What are you saying?
07:29It's a bit missing.
07:30Where is it?
07:31Come on.
07:32It's nearby.
07:33You've got one job, Alex.
07:34To give out the task.
07:35I've given you the task.
07:36I've given you the task.
07:37I've given you the task.
07:38Can I sit on it?
07:39Can I sit on it?
07:40Can I sit on it?
07:41Hold on.
07:42Hello?
07:43Hello?
07:44Hello?
07:45Hello?
07:46Hello?
07:47Hello?
07:48Hello?
07:49Hello?
07:50I've given you the task.
07:51I've given you the task.
07:52Can I sit on it?
07:55neurologically, like a hombre?
07:56OK, I should sit and read in A żeby's I had second job instead.
07:58.
08:00And I've given you the task.
08:02Right?
08:03Just to leave an example.
08:04Can Clic尾هpinkamercode dam destino so here it is.
08:06Can I sit on it?
08:10PHONE RINGS
08:11PHONE RINGS
08:12Can I open the desk in That way?
08:14And that's what I say.
08:16Can you just lie until you took it to me?
08:18I said, really, it's nearby.
08:19You've got one job, Alex.
08:21Give out the task.
08:22I've given you the task.
08:23Good, I'll sit on it.
08:24Ah, warm.
08:26Oh, OK. Warm.
08:28You're very warm.
08:29But you said I was very warm over there.
08:31Yeah, you were. Very warm.
08:33But not warmer than I was there.
08:35No, exactly the size.
08:37I can see it, if that helps.
08:41I cannot believe that.
08:44Liberties. If this stains my hijab, oh, bro.
08:51Congratulations.
08:52You've discovered the magic moustache
08:54and must wear it until the end of this task.
08:57Does it matter where?
08:58Let me see things through your eyes.
09:00Shall I have a look?
09:01Yeah.
09:02Staring right at it.
09:03Yeah.
09:04OK.
09:05Colder.
09:06Warmer.
09:07Warmer.
09:08Colder.
09:09Warmer.
09:10Colder.
09:11Colder.
09:12Warmer.
09:13Is it on me?
09:16Damn it.
09:18Colder?
09:19Warmer.
09:20Colder.
09:21Warmer.
09:22Warmer.
09:23Warmer.
09:29Warmer.
09:30Warmer.
09:31Warmer.
09:32Pretty hot now.
09:35What a laugh.
09:40Oh, yeah.
09:41Place something somewhere surprising.
09:44The thing that makes the taskmaster ask, how did that get there, the loudest wins.
09:49There is a bonus point for the most surprising answer to that question.
09:53You have a maximum of 30 minutes.
09:56Your time starts now.
09:58All right?
09:59I cannot help you.
10:01Have you been helping me?
10:03No.
10:04No.
10:05Oh!
10:06Ooh!
10:07Ooh!
10:08How do I get that?
10:09Mm.
10:10It's a little bit different, isn't it?
10:11It is a bit.
10:12So you are going to see something somewhere.
10:14Yeah.
10:15And you're going to respond with a...
10:16How did that get there?
10:17At varying levels, depending on how surprised you are.
10:21Quite exciting, isn't it?
10:22It is exciting.
10:23OK.
10:24I'm going to show you Fatia's thing placed somewhere incredibly surprising.
10:27Here we go.
10:28It's...
10:29..a croissant on a roof.
10:38Let's just see the natural reaction.
10:44How did that get there?
10:47How do you...
10:48How do you think it got there?
10:49I think that Fatia went straight outside and threw it on the roof.
10:52OK.
10:53Don't say anything Fatia.
10:55We're going to see one more before we see how she's done it.
10:57This is Rosie's thing.
11:00There it is.
11:01It's bra and a thong on a clock.
11:07How did that get there?
11:10You still don't seem that intrigued.
11:11How do you think it got there?
11:12I think she climbed up a ladder and put a bra and a thong on the clock.
11:16Interesting.
11:17Well, let's see how these things got where they got.
11:18Here we go.
11:22LAUGHTER
11:38Maybe that was too forceful, innit?
11:39Maybe.
11:43Hello.
11:44Hi.
11:46Excuse me.
11:47Yep.
11:53That's a lot higher than I thought it was.
11:55Yeah, and you're only little.
11:56Whoo!
11:57Oh, God.
11:58You're doing really well.
11:59Oh, why have I done this?
12:00Oh, my God.
12:01This is how I'm going to die.
12:02Right.
12:03This silly program.
12:04Oh, my God.
12:05Oh, my God.
12:06Oh, my God.
12:07Oh, my God.
12:11Oh, my God.
12:13This is how I'm going to die.
12:14This silly program.
12:16Oh
12:28My god
12:30Yes
12:32This is terrifying
12:35All right, oh god. I'm going you finished. Yeah
12:46You lobbed it up. How many goes did it take her? It took you seven goes
12:52It wasn't my fault. It was the croissant's fault. It kept on rolling. Yeah, the croissant did have something to do with it. Yeah
12:57What's written on the pants? I did write Greg if this wins I will give you 50 pounds
13:03But I have you got the cash. Yeah, and so just to let you know as well. It's a it's a new one
13:09Oh
13:15Why have you given it to him before the judgment?
13:27So, okay, you did what I said you climbed up a ladder and you thought I'll bribe my way out of this
13:33Yeah, interesting. Well, I've got the 50 pounds. We'll see how we feel at the end
13:36Right time for a break now, but as my auntie said when she accidentally threw a stick for her dog into an open quarry
13:42Come back, please come back
13:44attention
13:46Come back!
13:58Well, well, well
14:01It's the start of part two and time for me to continue to shout how did that get there or not?
14:07Yes, and right now that will depend on how stevie did i'm going to show you a photo greg
14:12How do you think this got here?
14:18A little
14:20Little wooden basket with with eggs in
14:22No breads, tiny, tiny french breads
14:25Tiny french breads
14:26Yeah
14:27How did that get there?
14:28Oh
14:30Someone's interested
14:32I think it probably got there in a weird way
14:36Okay, before i show you i'm going to show you matt's object
14:40How do you think this got there?
14:42It's a sofa in the garden
14:43Does that sound like this?
14:44Why is that hitting the house right now?
14:46Why is that hitting the house right there?
14:49How did that get there?
14:57How do you think it got there?
14:58Well, Matthew, using the manic energy that he's been storing up for a whole series
15:04Vietly dragged us out of the door
15:06OK. Well, let's see how those things got there.
15:20Temple.
15:24Alex! Would you like a small basket of breads?
15:29Oh, yes, please, Stevie.
15:36MUSIC PLAYS
15:50It's just a sofa in a garden.
15:54Or is it?
15:57Wow. How did that get there?
16:06LAUGHTER
16:09So it wasn't the sofa, it was the cushion that was the subject.
16:12It was me. It would be you.
16:13But I'm supposed to be surprised by how the thing got there, aren't I?
16:16Whatever you think is a good thing,
16:21if it's the sofa, if it's me... Look, we've got our base.
16:24It's not a croissant lobbed on a roof,
16:27so things are looking good.
16:29Now, here's the weird thing, if you'd have asked me to guest Stevie's,
16:33I was genuinely going to say I imagine that she lowered it
16:36into his mouth with a fishing rod, honestly.
16:38God.
16:39But I wasn't expecting her to have created an upside-down house.
16:42It's a surprising answer.
16:43It's surprising.
16:44Galore.
16:45It's surprising galore.
16:46OK.
16:47There is one more to see.
16:48I know.
16:49It's Jason Mantzoukas.
16:50A banana skin in a cupboard.
16:52LAUGHTER
16:54Now, should my how did that get there be based on what I see
17:03or my knowledge of Jason?
17:05That's up to you, Greg.
17:06OK, well, I'll give you both.
17:08How did that get there?
17:11How did that get there?
17:13LAUGHTER
17:15OK.
17:17Here we go. This is what happened.
17:19LAUGHTER
17:37Miss.
17:40Cheers.
17:41APPLAUSE
17:44APPLAUSE
17:51Oh, my God.
17:56I mean, fair play. Yeah.
17:59They did an incredible job making him greyer, I will say.
18:02He's not nearly as grey as I am. You're very different characters as well.
18:05Oh, yes. He's been on this show and he was...
18:08I mean, he was pathetic. Yeah.
18:11Right. Let's go.
18:13Fatia, I'm very fond of you, but I knew you'd lob that croissant on that roof.
18:18One point to Fatia. One point.
18:20I was mildly more intrigued by Rosie.
18:22Rosie would be right at the top if I were allowed to accept bribes,
18:25but I can't. OK, two for you.
18:28There's a bit of ambiguity about Matthews, I think.
18:31I knew how that sofa and those cushions got there,
18:34but I didn't expect him to be hiding in the cushions.
18:36So he did put something somewhere surprising.
18:38So I must reward that to some extent, so I'll give him three points.
18:40Three to you, Matthew.
18:41And we bounced up. Obviously, Stevie's was a masterpiece.
18:45So much going on there. Thank you.
18:47But I was so genuinely shocked by Kumar's arrival.
18:50I have to reward our American friend with five points.
18:53There we go. Four points. Five points to Jason. That's really good.
18:56APPLAUSE
18:58OK.
19:00I mean, there is a bonus point for the most surprising answer, I guess.
19:03Was it Jason's or Stevie's?
19:05Um, obviously, Jason.
19:06Jason gets another. He gets six points. OK, another point.
19:08Six points.
19:09OK, press your button and show me some scores.
19:14Jason's in the lead with 11 points.
19:16Lovely.
19:17CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
19:19That's a nice job.
19:20That's a nice job.
19:22Next!
19:23Yes, it's finally time for me to try out some new partners.
19:27Huh!
19:46Jason.
19:47Hello, Alex.
19:48Get those legs out.
19:49Wow.
19:50That's very white.
19:51Yeah, if you've got them.
19:52Yeah.
19:53Those getaway sticks.
19:56Ah!
19:57Oh!
19:58Got your legs out.
19:59What in the pasty hell is this?
20:01What is going on?
20:02Who's pasty?
20:03You, bruv. Look.
20:05You know what?
20:06Let's do this.
20:07Look at your getaway sticks.
20:08Yeah!
20:09All right.
20:10Create the most exciting new bodies
20:13so that you and Alex become a dynamic duo.
20:17What a sentence.
20:19You must then do something dynamic together
20:23for no more than a minute.
20:25Most dynamic duo wins.
20:27You have 30 minutes.
20:29Your time starts now.
20:30Most exciting bodies.
20:32Do I have to touch you?
20:33What the hell is going on?
20:34Most exciting new bodies.
20:37Oh, OK.
20:38So we can add appendages to ourselves.
20:42Just waiting for an idea to pop into the old noggin.
20:46That's not really how it works.
20:47Yeah.
20:48No.
20:49Oh, well, shall I just...
20:50OK.
20:51Yeah.
20:52Your time starts now.
20:54LAUGHTER
20:56APPLAUSE
20:58Close.
20:59One more.
21:00Looks like, er,
21:02Matthew may have overheard Stevie
21:04and decided to offer his appendage there.
21:06LAUGHTER
21:08OK.
21:09Here we go with Fatia and Stevie's
21:11oh-so-dynamic bodies.
21:13MUSIC
21:14BUZZER
21:25Ah, my old friend.
21:27Sir Alex of Horn.
21:29Ah, Sir Stevie of Martin.
21:32Hey, hijab, I don't think you've ever grappled with a raging horn before.
21:44The raging horn never subsides.
21:46I'm going to crack your horn and feed it to the pigeons.
21:50We have fought side by side for decades.
21:55But then you killed my son.
21:58It was an accident.
22:01But you will never believe me.
22:03Dismount, lad.
22:05Dismount, lad.
22:09Now arm yourself.
22:11For the last dance.
22:19Are you ready?
22:21Ready.
22:22Raging horns, ready.
22:25Hijab, ready.
22:27And...
22:29En garde!
22:30Ha!
22:31You've got no rhythm.
22:38One push and you're done.
22:40Oh!
22:41Here he goes.
22:43I have defeated him.
22:46Raging horn?
22:47More like raging delusional.
22:49He's still here.
22:50Oh, hello.
22:52Oh!
22:57I've had enough of this.
22:59Here comes the hijabi slobby.
23:10Honorist.
23:12Come here!
23:14Yes!
23:15Yes!
23:19My friend, it's been an honor.
23:22Oh!
23:23Oh!
23:24Oh!
23:25Oh!
23:31Thanks a lot for impressing me these days.
23:33I'm old and cynical.
23:34But you conjured up the majesty of medieval times.
23:39Oh, yeah.
23:40Yeah.
23:41Thought it was funny, well acted.
23:42It was a very touching moment.
23:44You killed my son.
23:47Loved it.
23:48See?
23:49When I'm nice, no-one likes it.
23:55Now then.
23:57I don't know what the hell was going on.
24:00The dynamism was where?
24:01I mean, it just looked like two people dressed as eggs,
24:03banging into each other.
24:05I used my whole body, you know.
24:07And Alex really did fall over.
24:09And I ended up banging my chin.
24:11Slowly.
24:12Yeah, I banged my chin.
24:13I'm sorry you banged your chin.
24:14Yeah.
24:15And I'm sorry that your video was rubbish.
24:19Who's next?
24:20OK.
24:21Well, here are Jason and I, and me, and Rosie.
24:24Oh!
24:25Skelly?
24:26Mm-hmm?
24:27We've been rattling around these streets for far too long.
24:31I think it's time that we get up to that city in the sky after one last dance.
24:45Oh.
24:46Are you ready?
24:47Yeah.
24:48Five, six, seven, eight.
24:50Five, seven, eight.
25:13That's right.
25:14We are the dynamic duo known as Captain Drum and Pipe Beast.
25:19Show them what you got, Pipe Beast.
25:24These are not our original bodies!
25:34Quieter now.
25:35Dynamics.
25:36Fight solo!
25:37This is rock and roll from the future.
25:41My left hand has run out of batteries.
25:42OK.
25:43.
25:44.
25:45.
25:46.
25:47.
25:48.
25:49.
25:50.
25:52.
25:53.
25:54.
26:01.
26:02.
26:03.
26:04.
26:05.
26:07.
26:08.
26:09.
26:10.
26:12.
26:13.
26:14.
26:15.
26:16.
26:17.
26:18.
26:19.
26:20.
26:21.
26:22.
26:23.
26:24.
26:25.
26:26.
26:27.
26:28.
26:29.
26:30.
26:31.
26:32.
26:33.
26:34.
26:35.
26:36.
26:37.
26:38.
26:39.
26:40.
26:41.
26:42.
26:43.
26:44.
26:45.
26:46.
26:47.
26:48.
26:49.
26:50.
26:51.
26:52.
26:53.
26:54.
26:55.
26:56.
26:57.
26:58.
26:59.
27:00.
27:01.
27:02.
27:03.
27:04.
27:05.
27:06.
27:07.
27:08.
27:09.
27:10.
27:11.
27:12.
27:13.
27:14.
27:15.
27:16.
27:17.
27:18.
27:19.
27:20.
27:21.
27:22.
27:23.
27:24.
27:25.
27:26.
27:27Body
27:57Power
28:07You
28:27MUSIC CONTINUES
28:30MUSIC CONTINUES
28:32MUSIC CONTINUES
28:33MUSIC CONTINUES
28:35LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
28:38APPLAUSE
28:41CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
28:44Well, man. What a beautiful take on the word dynamic.
28:49And it's the first time, and I'm new to this phrase,
28:52the first time I've had a camel toe.
28:55LAUGHTER
28:59Oh, my God.
29:01I know. I don't know what happened.
29:04I know.
29:06I don't know what it is.
29:09I don't know what it is.
29:11You look like you've got a big chubby fanny.
29:13LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
29:17I'm just glad we're talking about somebody else's ball.
29:20LAUGHTER
29:23Right, you need to judge this now.
29:25Yep.
29:26Most dynamic duo wins.
29:27I do have to judge it.
29:29LAUGHTER
29:30Well...
29:31LAUGHTER
29:32It's bad, isn't it?
29:33Please.
29:34But I tell you what, though, I so like the character,
29:37I'm not going to give you one point, I'm going to give you two points.
29:39OK.
29:40CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
29:42I thought that everything else was excellent,
29:44so I'm giving Rosie three and Jason three.
29:47Then I'm jumping up to the night story.
29:49The narrative was so complex, four points to Stevie Martin.
29:51OK.
29:52And, of course, how could I not give five points
29:55to Matthew's beautiful butterfly?
29:57Well done, Matthew.
29:58LAUGHTER
29:59APPLAUSE
30:04Right, let's have another.
30:05Yes, we're going to have another now.
30:06And another.
30:07And another.
30:08And another.
30:09And another.
30:10And another.
30:11All the information's on the task.
30:18Oh, all the information on the task.
30:24Salaam alaikum, habibi.
30:27Aw.
30:28Not a simple one.
30:29Ooh.
30:30OK, good.
30:31These are the ones I like.
30:33Let's get into a good hearty task.
30:36Immediately.
30:37Disaster.
30:39Conquer the multitask.
30:41You must complete every task in every room you enter.
30:50Fastest wins.
30:52Your time starts now.
30:53Now, either have a snack in the kitchen
30:55or a lie down in the hutch.
30:58Where's the hutch?
30:59Hmm.
31:03Good.
31:04I think I understand it.
31:05Mm-hm.
31:06Not much to say.
31:07We're going to do a snack in the kitchen, don't we?
31:08On this occasion.
31:09That's right.
31:10It's choose your own tasking time.
31:11And we're going to begin with Fatia and Jason.
31:13I'll do a snack in the kitchen, if you don't mind.
31:14I'll come with you.
31:15Shall we?
31:16Yes, please.
31:17Oh, habibi.
31:18You think you are clever?
31:20I am cleverer than you.
31:23285.8.
31:24You've written down your snack.
31:26What?
31:27Clean up this mess.
31:29What the hell, man?
31:30Oy, this is disgusting.
31:33Then either have a lie down in the hutch or finish a drink in the caravan.
31:38Drink in the caravan, please.
31:42I want the elixir, but I'm scared it's going to taste like nonsense.
31:45Blue drink, is it?
31:46Mm-hm.
31:50Done.
31:51Become this person.
31:52If you have eaten a snack, you must wear the snack sign for the rest of the task.
31:56Become this person.
31:57Oh, I see.
31:58This person.
31:59Got it.
32:00Sorry, sorry.
32:01Yes, please.
32:02Wander in the living room or a rummage in the shed, please.
32:03I'll have a rummage in the shed.
32:04Okay.
32:05Come.
32:07Can I have this coat?
32:08I think it's nice, you know?
32:11Give patatas the elixir.
32:14You must use the baby bottle to administer the elixir.
32:18Then you have conquered the multitask.
32:20Baby bottle is what I'm looking for.
32:24Baby bottle!
32:32Oh, oh.
32:33I found it.
32:34I found it.
32:35There's a safe.
32:36And I wrote down the combination.
32:382851.
32:43Okay.
32:44Remember, if you go into a room, you've got to do the task.
32:50Damn it!
32:52Become this person.
32:53If you have eaten a snack, you must wear the snack sign for the rest of the task.
32:56Boy, is this hard to figure out.
32:59Wait, wait, wait.
33:01Wait, wait, wait.
33:08Patatas be cool.
33:11That was pretty smooth.
33:13Thank you, Fatia.
33:16I'll stop the clock.
33:17I was genuinely, genuinely just thinking, oh, this is nice.
33:32Jason hasn't smashed anything up.
33:35An unnecessary cat murder at the end.
33:38And I dismantled the shed entirely.
33:40He did do that.
33:41Good.
33:42As long as you cost us money.
33:44Well, they were both quite good, weren't they?
33:46They were really good.
33:47They both sussed out the cookie code was significant early doors.
33:49And every time you went into a room, you had to do the task that was in there.
33:52So Fatia cleverly, at the end, didn't go into the room, but reached through and got the electricity.
33:55Real good.
33:56And that's why she is...
33:57Very clever.
33:58Five minutes quicker than Jason in the end.
34:00Six minutes 14 and 11 minutes 55.
34:02Wow.
34:03Top speed so far.
34:05Want to see two more?
34:06Yeah.
34:07OK, well, it's two women called Stevie and Rosie next.
34:09Yes, it's Stevie and Rosie.
34:10Here we go.
34:12Either have a snack in the kitchen or a lie down in the hutch.
34:15Ooh.
34:16Ooh, a lie down.
34:21All right, done that.
34:22Reconstruct the Taskmaster house.
34:23Yes, please.
34:24What is that?
34:272851.
34:28That's it.
34:29Now, either brush your teeth in the lab or have a snack in the kitchen.
34:31I'm going to have a little snacky snack.
34:33Snacks for me, please!
34:36It's a number again.
34:37It's not sand.
34:39Greg was here earlier.
34:40What?
34:41Keeping sand?
34:42Yeah.
34:4399.1 for having a drink.
34:44Come on.
34:45Yep, yep.
34:46Yeah.
34:47Don't either wander into the living room.
34:49We'll have a rummage in the shed.
34:50I've been in the shed already.
34:52I'll go back to the shed, seeing as I'm here.
34:54OK.
34:58Give Patatus the elixir.
35:00Who's Patatus?
35:01Well, if you need more information, you know where to go.
35:03Yeah, I do.
35:04I don't have to do this again, do I?
35:08Wash your teeth in the lab.
35:09I haven't washed my teeth.
35:10Oh, my God!
35:14Fold up the map.
35:16Behind some oars.
35:17I'm just going to remember, behind some oars...
35:19What map?
35:22I don't have a map yet.
35:23Do you not have a map yet?
35:24Where's the map?
35:25The map's going to be somewhere else.
35:27I guess so.
35:29OK.
35:30Then she should have said,
35:31I'm going to dance.
35:33I'm going to go and have a drink in the caravan.
35:38Become this person.
35:40Oh!
35:41Wander to the living room.
35:43Oh, hello.
35:44Hello.
35:45Pop this balloon.
35:46I'm so sorry.
35:47That was horrible.
35:48What is doing in that?
35:49You found me.
35:50Go immediately to the shed.
35:51Oh, the shed.
35:52This is the shed.
35:53That's the hutch.
35:54Give Patatus the elixir.
35:55Who's Patatus?
35:56Right, I need the elixir anyway.
35:57Right.
35:58Oh, a lollipop lady.
35:59OK, I'm going to go into the shed.
36:00Oh!
36:01Maybe it's a map of where I'm going to go.
36:02Oh!
36:03It's the hutch.
36:04Get Patatus the elixir.
36:05Who's Patatus?
36:06Right, I need the elixir anyway.
36:07Right.
36:08Oh, a lollipop lady.
36:09OK, I'm going to go into the shed.
36:11Oh!
36:12Maybe it's a map of where Patatus is.
36:13Do you think?
36:14Shut...
36:16Was that there before?
36:17I mean, it's huge, you can't have been.
36:18Can't it?
36:19It was behind the ores.
36:21Right, 2-8-5-1.
36:23I mean, it's huge, you can't have been, can't it?
36:26It's got... It was behind the oars!
36:29Right, 2851.
36:32Hello, baby.
36:33I don't know who wants it. He wants it.
36:37Oh, stop the clock.
36:39APPLAUSE
36:40Lovely, lovely.
36:43Lovely.
36:46The thing that fascinates me is the difference in your energies.
36:48And I felt like I was watching one mad teenager
36:51who'd eaten three Easter eggs,
36:54and then a mum who was just pottering around the shop.
36:58Oh, well, I guess I'll pop in here, then.
37:00See what we've got in here.
37:02Follow her, like, yeah, yeah!
37:04I've got two kids, I think that's the difference.
37:07I ate quite a lot of the biscuits.
37:09Were they similar time? Tell me some stats.
37:12They were a similar number of rooms they went into.
37:14They each went into 13 rooms.
37:15Stevie, 23 minutes and 29 seconds.
37:19OK.
37:20Still much quicker than Rosie, who was half an hour.
37:23Of course she was.
37:24She went and had her nails done halfway through.
37:28Right, well, that's the end of part three.
37:30Soon, you'll see one of the cast up on stage
37:32waving behind a chest of drawers, an air fryer,
37:35some boobs, a foot and a paddling pool.
37:37And you'd be forgiven for thinking perhaps humans should be extinct.
37:41We'll see you in a minute.
37:43CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
37:53Welcome back to the very last part of the show.
37:55There was a busy old task going on before the break,
37:58wasn't there, Alex?
37:59Mm-mm.
38:00Yes, there was.
38:01The cast are trying to conquer the multitask
38:03and there's only one person left to go,
38:05presumably because he's been so brilliant.
38:07It's Matt.
38:12Is this a nice snack for me?
38:13Clean up this mess.
38:15Pardon?
38:16Clean up this mess.
38:17Drink into the caravan.
38:19We're going to the caravan, are we?
38:20Oh, Alexia, why not?
38:22You deserve it.
38:25To the living room.
38:28Oh, I've never seen it done like that before.
38:30Then shimmy to the shed.
38:34Give Patatas the Alexia.
38:36Where's the Alexia?
38:37In me.
38:38Is there more Alexia?
38:43Who is Patatas?
38:44Oh, if you need more information,
38:45either have a snack in the kitchen or a lie-down in the hutch.
38:51While I'm here, I really am keen to have gathered a clue.
38:56Then either brush your teeth in the lab
38:58or have a snack in the kitchen.
38:59Right.
39:04The safe.
39:07What's the code?
39:10There must be more clues in here.
39:14I guess we move.
39:15The things I'm... I know I'm going to be back here.
39:20That's enough.
39:21That's enough for me.
39:22I'm just doing nothing more.
39:24Brush your teeth and then have a rummage in the chair.
39:26Spot this balloon and I'm snapping the kitchen.
39:27The fact that says have a lie-down makes me think it must be a clue.
39:35Up above.
39:36There's probably a clue in here.
39:37You would have thought.
39:42There's a clue.
39:422851.
39:44Pop into the lab.
39:45OK.
39:48I forgot the number again.
39:512-5-6-1.
39:542-5-7-1.
39:57It's not accepting any, well, buttons anymore.
40:00You might have to give it a couple of minutes.
40:02Just popping off to the hutch for a little lie-down.
40:062-8-5-1.
40:082-8-5-1.
40:092-8-5-1.
40:102-8-5-1.
40:122-8-5-1.
40:14I've broken the safe.
40:15Now, you've been locked out for four minutes.
40:17We have to wait.
40:21It's amazing how many regrets you can have, isn't it?
40:23I've done the clock, Matthew.
40:45Erm, it was bad luck, though.
40:46Do you not think?
40:47That's what I felt throughout.
40:49Bad luck?
40:49I just thought he was really unlucky, that he missed things.
40:52Well, I mean, you say that.
40:53He went into 32 rooms a year.
40:59What?
41:00Sorry, I take it back.
41:01The man's an idiot.
41:04Ah, you'll be all right.
41:06Yeah.
41:07Don't say it like that, though, because it seemed over defensive, that did.
41:10Yeah, no, I'm fine.
41:11Whatever.
41:12Well, I fucking am.
41:19Right, give me some scores.
41:20Factory gets the five points.
41:22The fastest one, Miles, five points.
41:23Well done, Factory.
41:25Six minutes.
41:26Jason's in second.
41:27He gets four points for his 11 minutes 55.
41:29Stevie, three points, 23 minutes.
41:31Rosie, half an hour, but still you get two points for coming fourth,
41:34because Matthew took 51 minutes and gets one point.
41:37LAUGHTER
41:38Unlucky, though, Matthew.
41:4051.
41:42OK, will you make your way to the stage for the final task of the show?
41:46CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
41:55Hi there, my dear friend.
41:57Hey, Greg.
41:57You all right?
41:58Yeah, I've just been to the gym.
42:02Who's going to read the task out?
42:03My beautiful butterfly brother, Bainton.
42:07Thanks, brother.
42:10Say a word that fits the category given by the taskmaster.
42:14Then press your button and the time will pass to the other team.
42:18Team members must take it in turns to say words,
42:21and no words may be repeated during the task.
42:24The team that does not run out of time wins.
42:28I will explain.
42:29There's a chess clock here.
42:30Both teams have got 30 seconds.
42:32So, the quicker you think, the quicker you press the button,
42:35the better you'll do.
42:35The team of three is going first.
42:37OK.
42:37As soon as I press the button, your clock starts.
42:39Round one.
42:39The category is?
42:41It's five-letter words.
42:42Good luck.
42:43Penis.
42:44LAUGHTER
42:45Apple.
42:46Ankle.
42:46Apple.
42:47Chips.
42:48Chips, good.
42:50Agree.
42:50Agree is good.
42:53Flags.
42:54Lovely.
42:55Shoes.
42:56Death.
42:56Metal.
42:57Death metal?
42:58That's nice.
42:59Light.
43:00Tsk.
43:01Tsk.
43:01Tsk.
43:02Found.
43:03Knife.
43:03Knife.
43:04Forks.
43:04Forks.
43:05Angel!
43:06Not you!
43:06LAUGHTER
43:08I thought you just did one.
43:10I'm sorry.
43:10No, it's all right.
43:11But no, stay there.
43:11Why say forks?
43:12I know, but then she said...
43:14So, ask your team.
43:15It's your team.
43:16Looks like the supply teacher's lost control.
43:18LAUGHTER
43:19It's your team.
43:20LAUGHTER
43:22Don't press the button until they've done it.
43:24OK, I'm sorry.
43:24Piles.
43:25Angels.
43:27Angels.
43:28Grit.
43:30Tasks.
43:31Lovely, cos that's the show, isn't it?
43:32Boobs.
43:33Crisp.
43:34Charm.
43:35Carrie.
43:36Queen.
43:38Kings.
43:39Flits.
43:40Hands.
43:41Rosie.
43:42Not you!
43:43LAUGHTER
43:44Oh!
43:45Oh!
43:46Oh!
43:47Oh!
43:48Fox.
43:49Rosie.
43:51Jason.
43:52Oh!
43:53It's all over.
43:54This team wins round one.
43:56APPLAUSE
43:57Well, if that was tricky, you'd better strut yourselves in.
44:03LAUGHTER
44:04It's round two, everyone.
44:05It's 1-0 to the team of three.
44:08Words that start and end with the letter T.
44:13They start and end with the letter T.
44:15We're starting with a team of two.
44:16Good luck.
44:17TWAT!
44:18TWAT!
44:20TIT!
44:20TWIST!
44:21TWIST!
44:22THRIST!
44:23TENANT!
44:24TIT!
44:27TRUT!
44:27TENANT!
44:29TAUGHT!
44:30TWIT!
44:31TINT!
44:32TOOT!
44:32TOOT!
44:33TOOT!
44:34Top-a-la-ba-top-top-top-tip-poo!
44:35LAUGHTER
44:36Don't stress that button until you say a word that starts the number T.
44:39T.
44:40We've had TRUT.
44:41Tint. No helping, Fatia. Sorry.
44:47No, what's that been? We've had tint.
44:50Torrent.
44:52Torrent. What was the word? Torrent.
44:55Oh, it's team of two.
44:58Round two.
45:00OK. Are you all right?
45:03That's very nice. She's just checking I'm OK.
45:05Not really, no, not really.
45:07You're doing well. You've not been a teacher long.
45:10OK, it is round three, the final round.
45:13It's won all. This is it. Good luck.
45:15Here we go, Stevie.
45:16This is absolutely horrific.
45:18Words one letter longer than the previous words.
45:23Starting with you, Rosie, go.
45:25I.
45:26In.
45:28We're looking for a three-letter word.
45:31The.
45:33Rat.
45:34Fudge.
45:35Fudges.
45:37We're looking for a seven-letter word.
45:39Beatles.
45:42Yes.
45:43Um.
45:44Brr.
45:45So I'm eight?
45:46Yes.
45:47Chainsaw.
45:48Correct.
45:49A nine-letter word.
45:50Meat freeze.
45:51No, I can't.
45:52I can't.
45:53I can't.
45:54No, you get.
45:55You get brain freeze.
45:56You don't get meat freeze.
45:57Um.
45:58Um.
45:59I.
46:00You could have had chainsaws for the team.
46:01of two wins.
46:02There we go.
46:03Come down.
46:04We'll have back to your final scores.
46:05Oh, God.
46:06Hello, John.
46:07Hello.
46:08Hello again.
46:09Surprising.
46:10Yes, I just enjoyed being in full control of a task.
46:12So the team of three gets three points.
46:13The team of two get five points.
46:14Well done.
46:15Jason and Stevie.
46:16Yeah.
46:17Which means that the team of two have dominated today's scoreboard.
46:18Stevie is in second place with 19 points, but Jason Mantzoukas wins the episode his second
46:24for 22 points.
46:25Oh, God.
46:26It's a very good job.
46:27Thank you, John.
46:28So the team of three gets three points.
46:29The team of two gets five points.
46:30Well done.
46:31It's a great job, John.
46:32Thank you, John.
46:35Thank you, John.
46:36Thank you, John.
46:37Thank you, John.
46:38Thank you, John.
46:40Thank you, John.
46:41Thank you, John.
46:42Thank you, John.
46:43in second place with 19 points, but Jason Mantzoukas wins the episode,
46:46his second for 23 points!
46:48CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:50Please go up and celebrate on the table.
46:53Give me your savings from Nick Denny!
46:56It's the final next, but for now, there's just one winner,
47:00and it's Jason Mantzoukas!
47:13CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
Empfohlen
47:58
|
Als nächstes auf Sendung
47:58
48:06
39:45
47:23
47:27
45:40
47:30
47:22
47:29
47:26
47:24
47:54
47:30
47:29
47:30
47:33
45:35
45:07