Dumbest Things You Bought On The Internet

Beasley Digital

Transcript

00:00Ah, the internet. It's a lovely place.

00:03You're a big online shopper?

00:05You know, I try to buy brick and mortar, brick and mortar rather, but it's just tough sometimes.

00:11Sometimes you need something specialty, sometimes you need that thing that comes up on your Facebook feed, on your Instagram.

00:18All the sponsored ads.

00:19All the sponsored ads. I've fallen for it before.

00:22Same.

00:22I once bought a Mother's Day shirt, like a onesie, for one of the babies.

00:27Two months ahead of time, and it didn't come until after Mother's Day, and they wouldn't give me a refund.

00:33I can't. That makes me so mad.

00:35That makes me so angry.

00:37That's why I don't do a lot of online shopping, but my husband's the king.

00:41You have to buy it from a reputable company.

00:43Yeah.

00:43Yeah, that's the problem.

00:45We're talking about the dumbest things you've ever bought online today.

00:47702-597-1027.

00:49If you just got a real, silly, dumb, goofy thing that you tend to buy for yourself.

00:57Okay, so I'm the king of buying stupid stuff.

00:59There is a scene in Back to the Future 2.

01:03You're not a Back to the Future fan like I am.

01:05Are you a Back to the Future fan at all?

01:06I mean, I've watched them.

01:07Okay.

01:08Do you remember this scene in Back to the Future 2 where they have that little, tiny, little pizza?

01:14Hold on a second.

01:14I'll show you right here.

01:15Here it is.

01:15Hey, pizza.

01:17All right.

01:17Just wait for it.

01:18All right.

01:19See that little, tiny pizza?

01:21Don't you be a smartass.

01:22Here we go.

01:23I'll break the atrocity channel.

01:25Hydrate level four, please.

01:27That little, tiny pizza.

01:29They put it in the machine.

01:30Uh-huh.

01:30Hydrate level four, please.

01:32Boom.

01:32Two seconds later, it's a full-size pizza.

01:34So you bought one.

01:35I have one.

01:36Does it really work?

01:37Does it do that?

01:37No.

01:38It does.

01:38It's just a little rubber fake pizza.

01:41Wow.

01:42Okay.

01:43It was $12.

01:45Really?

01:45Why not?

01:46Wait.

01:47You have the pizza or the machine?

01:48The machine doesn't exist.

01:49It's a figment of your imagination.

01:51So you literally just bought that small pizza?

01:52The rubber little disc of a pizza.

01:54Wow.

01:55That's very interesting.

01:57Do you let your dogs play with it?

01:58No.

01:59No.

01:59Pesky doesn't get near it.

02:00No one gets near it.

02:01No one gets near any of my Back to the Future stuff.

02:03I'm very particular.

02:05That's so crazy.

02:06Yeah.

02:07There's one thing I brought, actually.

02:09I brought a little show and tell here.

02:10We'll save this to the very end.

02:13There is another thing online.

02:15I just stumbled across this.

02:16It's dumb, but I think it's the greatest thing ever.

02:19I just made this for you while we were waiting in the wings here.

02:22Who do you see on the screen?

02:24Is that Weird Al?

02:26That is Weird Al.

02:26Weird Al Yankovic is doing e-cards for birthdays, but he has every name.

02:33He's done all the names.

02:34So Amy, A-I-M-E-E.

02:37Here it is.

02:40Oh, hey, Amy.

02:41How you doing?

02:42Al here.

02:44Listen, I know you're super busy.

02:48You got a lot going on.

02:50I really hate to bother you, but there's something I've been meaning to tell you, and I'm afraid

02:57it just can't wait any longer.

03:01Happy birthday to you.

03:02Oh, my God.

03:03You bought that?

03:05No.

03:06Yeah, right.

03:06But you can.

03:07Oh, my God.

03:08And you can send this as an e-card.

03:12That is hysterical.

03:13It's great.

03:17It's great.

03:18Yeah.

03:18I love the internet.

03:20So he does this whole dance, and you'll see your name in balloons the whole nine yards.

03:23That's so crazy.

03:25That's so crazy.

03:25But he does all the names.

03:26Tell me, where did you find that?

03:28It was on an ad on Facebook.

03:30It's so good.

03:31Oh, my God.

03:31Your algorithm is really weird.

03:33It's very weird.

03:35It's a dark place.

03:36What are you looking up?

03:37Take a look.

03:37But this is weird.

03:38I'll doing the same thing for the longest name I could find.

03:45Oh.

03:45Hey, Abdel Rahman.

03:46How you doing?

03:49Oh, my God.

03:50And he sings the Abdel Rahman, and he gives a look at the screen like, I know that your

03:56name is not Abdel Rahman, but I'm going to sing it because you paid for it.

04:01So he seriously did every name, right?

04:04Legit hundreds of names.

04:05He's saying this several times.

04:07Yeah, yeah, yeah.

04:09Here we go.

04:11And he gives the camera a look like, I can't believe you're making me do this.

04:14Here we go.

04:15Happy birthday, Abdel Rahman.

04:20Oh, my God.

04:24That is so, so crazy.

04:26It's so good.

04:26All right.

04:27Here we go.

04:28This is my show and tell.

04:29This came across my Instagram, and as soon as I saw it, I'm like, this is coming on the

04:33show.

04:34Oh, my God.

04:35And it came with the frame.

04:37I just want you to take a look at this, and I want you to read what that says.

04:42Oh, God.

04:42No, I'm not reading it.

04:43I'd like you to read.

04:44Lord Sean Tempesta.

04:46Keep going.

04:46I've referred to as the Lord has by way of notice this 20th day of June for year 2022

04:55and the 17th year of the reign of our what?

05:00What is going on here?

05:02Like a square inch in Scotland, and I am now a Lord.

05:06I literally cannot.

05:08You have too much money on your hands.

05:12That's a write-off.

05:13Because this is so stupid.

05:14No, no, you keep it.

05:15I don't want it.

05:16No, it's a frame.

05:16You can just, you can.

05:17No, listen.

05:18You keep that on your side.

05:19I'll.

05:20No.

05:20It'll remind you of the greatness you sit across from every day.

05:23What a loser.

05:26It's the dumbest thing you buy online.

05:28That.

05:29God.

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