Being on Jury Duty is crazy | Gastor Almonte | Standup Comedy - video Dailymotion

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Transcript

00:00I am currently on jury duty.

00:03I'm not supposed to talk about it,

00:07but that's all we're gonna talk about, okay?

00:10Been dying to get this off my chest, okay?

00:14I was so honest with the judge, too.

00:15I told him, I said, yo, listen, I'm a stand-up comic.

00:18My whole job is to go out at night and talk about my day,

00:23but they're so hard up for jurors that he was like,

00:26oh, so you're free from 9 to 5, you know?

00:29And now I'm on a jury, you know?

00:31And they ask you questions to try to, like, filter you out,

00:34so they were like, hey, listen, this is a murder case.

00:37You know, it's a felony.

00:38Are you okay listening to details

00:40about a murder for two weeks?

00:41And I was like, listen, I'm from New York.

00:43I wanted to kill people every day, okay?

00:46You know, by the same token, 30-some-odd years.

00:48I haven't done it yet, so I get the other side, you know?

00:53Perspective.

00:55And then he was like, okay, so we meet Monday through Friday.

00:58Are you free to do that?

00:59And I was like, actually, I got a show on Friday in Rhode Island,

01:03and I thought that was gonna knock me out the running,

01:06but he just took a note.

01:08He sent me out the room, and then when he brought us all in,

01:10he was like, ladies and gentlemen,

01:12you are officially members of the jury.

01:15We'll be meeting Monday through Thursday

01:20because some of you have other obligations.

01:23This dude is on trial for murder,

01:26and it got delayed a week

01:27so I can entertain 70 people in Providence?

01:32That's too much power, you know?