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casper.bradley
  • 7/9/2025

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TV
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00:00Previously on Men in Trees...
00:01They're living in Alaska.
00:03They don't have a nail place or a... or a spitting class.
00:06What's a girl got to do? They need to get a salesperson around here.
00:08Go to New York.
00:10Your seat taken?
00:10You're not from here.
00:12Anchorage.
00:12I'm sorry about your brother, but I did not know it was your brother.
00:16I think we should have sex.
00:17I love you, Raimi.
00:19I love you, too.
00:21It's hot.
00:24We live in different parts of the house.
00:26She means separate wings.
00:28She made the last thing was in the state.
00:30I need to know if I'm good in bed.
00:32I slipped a bit.
00:33I don't think I'm ready to be involved again.
00:37I am not ready either.
00:39Friends?
00:40Friends.
00:51Lately, everything's changed.
00:54Been rearranged.
00:56I know I said I wanted culture, but this diorama is about as big as this town.
01:14Yeah, it was the first thing I commissioned after I took over as curator of the Elmo Museum.
01:19Yeah, check it out.
01:22Tiny me.
01:23Oh.
01:24But, um, this place is a museum?
01:28Uh, an alternate Saturdays.
01:30Yeah.
01:31Patrick, this is, um, very unique.
01:34But when I said I was looking for culture, I was hoping for something, uh, more like the ballet or, uh, wine tasting.
01:43Hmm.
01:43We used to have, uh, karaoke night at the chieftain.
01:46Till buzzed through the machine out the window.
01:49Hmm.
01:49Yeah, we're Elmo, not Anchorage.
01:52I know, but where do you take any when you guys go out at night?
01:56Actually, uh, we're not, uh, getting out much these days.
02:03If you catch my drift.
02:05Oh.
02:06I catch your drift.
02:08Yeah, don't touch.
02:10Museum.
02:12The thing is, after we're done not getting out, she asked me to get out.
02:17We still haven't had a sleepover.
02:19Really?
02:20I think we might be having, uh, intimacy issues.
02:25Intimacy issues?
02:27How long have you two been seeing each other?
02:3037 days.
02:32I don't know who's counting.
02:35True intimacy takes time.
02:37Gotcha.
02:38How much time?
02:53Okay, Snuggle Muffin.
02:57Time to skedaddle.
02:58Haven't I skedaddled enough?
03:00I have to get up early for work.
03:02Yeah, but it's only 8.45.
03:04I have to get up super early.
03:07And I like to make the bed as soon as I get up.
03:10And I can't make it if you're still in it.
03:12Right?
03:13Is there something you're not telling me?
03:14Because if you're anti-spooning or something, that's cool.
03:19I can de-spoon.
03:21Don't be silly.
03:22Hey, everything's great.
03:24You sure?
03:25Sure, sure, sure.
03:28All right, yeah.
03:36Let's separate.
03:37Window down.
03:38Window down.
03:40Come on.
03:41Celia?
03:42Yeah, this isn't Lover's Lane.
03:43It's a state highway.
03:45We're not bothering anyone.
03:46Look at my face.
03:49I'm bothered.
03:50There's a place for everything, hmm?
03:53Especially this.
03:54Actually, I believe there's an expression for it.
03:57Get a room.
03:57Which you already have.
04:00This isn't that.
04:02Whatever.
04:03I'm closing this heavy petting zoo down.
04:06If I catch you two here again, they'll be charges.
04:11You want to go to the inn?
04:15No.
04:15I told you, I don't want to mix business with pleasure.
04:18Well, let's find another spot.
04:19This is ridiculous.
04:20I think making it out of the car is kind of fun.
04:24Yeah.
04:24If we were 16.
04:26But we're not.
04:27We're adults.
04:28With kids at home and...
04:31Wives at home.
04:33Hey, I'm not one to judge.
04:39I'm not with her.
04:41I'm with you.
04:47What's that?
04:49Hey.
04:50Hey.
04:50See ya.
04:57Nice talking to you.
05:00When did you two start sleeping together?
05:02What?
05:03That's crazy.
05:04We were so not sleeping together.
05:06Uh-huh.
05:07All right, look.
05:08Something might have happened once.
05:09Maybe twice.
05:10That's it.
05:11I think you guys would make a good couple.
05:15Trust me.
05:16Neither one of us are in a place to be in a relationship right now.
05:18We're just gonna be friends.
05:20It's all good.
05:21And you can pull that off.
05:22Just friends.
05:23I'm excited to get to know them.
05:25Be pals.
05:27It's been done before.
05:29Mm-hmm.
05:29Not by me.
05:31But look at you and Ben.
05:32Yeah.
05:33Yeah.
05:34The poster couple for ambivalent relationships.
05:36Well, it's gotta be easier to be friends now that you're both dating.
05:38I'm talking about Sarah.
05:39I'm talking about Ben and Sarah.
05:42Oh, man.
05:43Oh, man.
05:44You knew, right?
05:45About Ben and Sarah?
05:47I figure.
05:49Look, it's a small town.
05:51You knew about you and Jack, right?
05:52Just friends.
05:54Got it.
05:54So, can you be friends with someone you've slept with?
06:02What do you think, guys?
06:04Glenn from Sick Online, too?
06:06Yeah, you can do it.
06:07I think so, too.
06:08As long as you're not hot for them anymore or if the sex sucked.
06:12But what if the sex was good?
06:15Then what are you doing not having sex with them?
06:17Got a point.
06:18Let's go to Zach and catch again.
06:20Yeah.
06:21I tried being friends with this girl after we did it.
06:23I just kept thinking about her with her clothes off.
06:25Who wants to go backwards?
06:27But friendship is backwards?
06:28Once you've gotten more with someone, why would you want less?
06:34I don't get it.
06:35If everything is so great, why don't you let him stay over?
06:39You promise you won't tell anyone?
06:42I snore.
06:43Okay?
06:44That's all.
06:47It's bad, Maren.
06:48Come on, how bad can it be?
06:50I can't say for sure because I've never heard myself.
06:53I tried taping myself, but the batteries died before I hit REM sleep.
06:57Or I snort so loud I broke the machine.
06:59Oh, God, what if I broke the machine, Maren?
07:02So you don't really know how loud it is?
07:06Oh, I know.
07:07I used to wake my whole family.
07:10They made me sleep in the garage.
07:12It's bad.
07:13Now, what's bad is, Alma only takes up an eighth of a page in the guidebook to Alaskan culture.
07:18I'm not joking.
07:19Annie, we all have secret things about ourselves that we're scared to reveal.
07:24But when you're really intimate with someone, you've got to trust that they'll be able to handle that stuff.
07:31All that stuff.
07:33So what's your secret thing?
07:36Dangling lobes.
07:37Even your lobes are adorable.
07:40Unlike my snoring.
07:42Well, thanks for lunch.
07:45I should get back to the office.
07:46I'm in charge while Jack's away.
07:48Really?
07:48Where is he?
07:49He's tracking Bear out on the Fairbanks Trail.
07:52Oh, sounds dangerous.
07:53Actually, he's just collecting stool samples.
07:57Ah, more gross than dangerous.
07:59He's taking them up to the zoo outside of Anchorage tomorrow to be analyzed.
08:03Really?
08:04See ya.
08:07Anchorage has its own book.
08:12Hey!
08:14What's up?
08:16Oh, slingbacks.
08:17These are not.
08:18Oh!
08:18Thanks.
08:23I hear you're driving to Anchorage.
08:25Yeah, we're 20 miles outside.
08:27Why?
08:27Want company?
08:29Wait, you want to go to the zoo with me?
08:30No, I want to go to the city with you.
08:33Why?
08:33Because I'm dying for a dose of culture, and you're my ticket.
08:38Well, you have a car.
08:40Can't you drive yourself?
08:41Well, I could, but then I would be alone.
08:43And we said we were going to be friends.
08:45This is something friends would do together.
08:46Unless you're not on board with this whole friend thing.
08:50Oh, totally on board with the friend thing.
08:52Okay.
08:52So why don't we start off with a couple of beers at the chieftain?
08:55Oh, come on.
08:56It'll be fun.
08:57I'm a whiz at the road trip games.
09:00You serious?
09:01Sure.
09:02Can you think of a better way to celebrate this new chapter in our relationship?
09:06Oh, we have chapters?
09:08Mm-hmm.
09:09Chapter one, strangers.
09:10Chapter two, sex.
09:13Chapter three, friends.
09:15And what's chapter four?
09:18Um, old friends looking back on the fond memories of our trip to Anchorage.
09:23Look, I really don't like the city.
09:28Okay, look.
09:29I will race you to that stump.
09:31It needs a tennis racket on our feet.
09:36You're kidding.
09:36No, I win, you drive me into Anchorage.
09:38And if I win?
09:40I'll cook you a home-cooked meal.
09:42That's a prize?
09:43Hey, I cook.
09:47You're on.
09:50Let's do it.
09:52Ooh, a little competitive, are we?
09:54On your mark, go, set, go!
09:55Hey!
10:15Oh, it's nice.
10:18So nice.
10:19you know i'll be ever nicer me staying over
10:25what is it i've been patient it's been 38 days already
10:33i've been counting too yes sirree
10:37you know sleepover is the natural evolution of all things romantic and meant to be
10:45fun which one of maren's books is that fun i made it up you like it
10:53okay
10:57patrick would you stay over yes
11:05morning sunshine
11:30oh this is gonna be fun we're gonna go shopping we're gonna go to the aviation museum
11:45okay uh here are the car rules there's no going through the glove compartment no top 40
12:02and anything you find on the floor stays on the floor you got it yes sir
12:08i got us a couple of tickets to the opera
12:11not a chance bye bye you've never been that's a safe bet you're gonna love it i swear it changed
12:18my mind i changed mine because i'm not going well come on it's the opening night of romeo and juliette
12:23it'll be my treat to thank you for the lift no i'm gonna break it no you're not
12:30you would think you would be more interested in sharing your new friend's interests
12:35okay if i say yes
12:41you'll be quiet
12:43yes
12:45okay
12:47great
12:50maybe we can have sushi
12:52no
12:52oh keep it quiet
12:55i can't help thinking that you love somebody but me
13:01ben my main man
13:06hey patrick
13:07will you make sure that sarah gets this when she comes in
13:12sure if she leave it at the bar
13:14i will
13:15oh got it cool
13:18thanks
13:19you want a muffin
13:20no i'm not hungry thank you
13:22you sure so i made this batch with extra joy
13:25you know man there's nothing better than going to bed with your favorite lady except maybe
13:30waking up next to her just having her there all night
13:34patrick
13:34yeah
13:35will you please shut up
13:37i'll make sure she gets this
13:52you know what to do
13:58but i'm not hungry
14:05i know what to do
14:08i mean
14:09Hey, sweet cakes, rise and shine.
14:35Good morning, Chief.
14:36Slattery, no, you sleep on the job.
14:38I wasn't sleeping.
14:40Honey, you were out cold.
14:42Yeah, I think they heard you down at the dock.
14:44Oh, no.
14:47Oh, yes.
14:49Was it that bad?
14:50Off the charge, sugar.
14:52Honestly, I've never heard any noise like that before.
14:55I mean, not from a human, anyway.
14:59You won't tell Patrick, will you?
15:02Not too crazy about keeping secrets from the boy.
15:05You know, he's highly sensitive in the audio department.
15:10He is?
15:11Can't tolerate loud noises.
15:14His first dog had a bark that could peel paint.
15:18We loved that gal, but we had to get rid of her.
15:21Wasn't there anything remotely adorable or endearing about it?
15:29Hmm.
15:30Well, she could play dead like a pro.
15:33I meant me.
15:35Oh, the snoring?
15:36Mm-hmm.
15:37No.
15:38Nothing cute there.
15:39Seriously, how good is this double latte?
15:45It's about as good as the double latte we had a half an hour ago.
15:48Competing coffee places.
15:50How great is that?
15:51I love Anchorage.
15:57I'll take one with the worst.
16:02Mm.
16:03I lived on these when I went to college here.
16:09Don't I have to?
16:11Yes.
16:12Of course.
16:13You know, I didn't have to drive.
16:14You got to be right, I don't know.
16:15Okay.
16:16And you're going to be like that.
16:22Not bad.
16:23Not sushi.
16:24Not bad.
16:26I know a thing or two about the city.
16:28Really?
16:28Then you know what one wears for the opening night of an opera in the city.
16:31Oh, no, sorry.
16:34I draw the line at monkey suits.
16:35Oh, I have this amazing dress that has been dying to get out.
16:38It deserves to be with a tux.
16:40No, I'm just drawing the line.
16:42Oh, you draw a lot of lines, Larry.
16:44Yeah, and you keep trying to cross them all.
16:45How else are we supposed to get to know each other?
16:48Is that what we're doing here?
16:50You got it, buddy.
16:51One line at a time.
16:55So what did you do last night?
16:58Nothing.
17:00I know about you and Sarah.
17:02It's cool.
17:04Do you like her?
17:07I don't really feel comfortable talking about that with you.
17:11Come on, we're still friends, right?
17:14We're friends who are married and living together and dating other people.
17:18Still friends.
17:19I feel like I can't bring her to the house.
17:24Why not?
17:25I brought guys to the house.
17:26Yeah, that's been really great for me.
17:28Did you forget to lock up last night?
17:38No.
17:38Careful.
17:43Don't move too much.
18:01I don't want to spook it.
18:02What do we do?
18:04I call Jack.
18:06Jack and Mariner in Anchorage.
18:07Trying to be friends.
18:09Great.
18:09Oh, someone's angry.
18:17This is for you.
18:18What?
18:19You're writing me a ticket for keeping a wild animal as a pet?
18:22Read it and weeps, I free.
18:24Jerome, what the hell are you doing?
18:26You've never bagged me a real-life caribou before.
18:28I don't think it counts if a caribou's trapped by a pool table.
18:31Around the little corner pocket.
18:33Give me that.
18:34I'm just trying to help here.
18:37It's an unsafe drinking environment, if you ask me.
18:39People, this is not the Wild West.
18:42This is the unincorporated town of Elmo, Alaska.
18:45And if that animal is not out of this bar by tonight, I'm calling in the feds.
18:49I want my gun back.
18:50Yeah, I want my perky butt back, too.
18:52Not gonna happen.
18:56Oh, no.
18:59Oh, no.
19:04This is so beautiful.
19:06You always so bad yourself.
19:08Oh, thanks.
19:10And you, my friend, look very handsome and formal there.
19:14Oh.
19:16I did, or did I?
19:18Big City Jack isn't as hopeful as Country Jack.
19:22Hey, you know what I need?
19:23A monocle.
19:25Maybe a pipe.
19:26How about we get a drink and we'll go way up to the monocle?
19:29I want to be.
19:30Oh, vodka Negroni, please.
19:32Uh, vodka Negroni and a beer.
19:38You remind me of having a beer, do you?
19:39No, I do not.
19:41In fact, make that two bottles of beer.
19:44This is the opera.
19:45We don't serve beer in bottles.
19:46Oh, funny.
19:47Because you deserve attitude.
19:48Mmm, the city makes you feisty.
19:50I pretty much travel with the feisty.
19:57It's hot in here.
19:58A little.
19:59Must be all the people.
20:00Oh, God, I miss crowds.
20:04Undressed, fashionable crowds.
20:07Smoking porch.
20:09Score.
20:09Come on.
20:12Hey.
20:26Annie.
20:27Annie.
20:28You're supposed to fall asleep after we do it, not during.
20:32I wasn't sleeping.
20:34I was just resting my eyes.
20:35You fell asleep on me.
20:37Wow.
20:39How long?
20:40I don't know.
20:41Five seconds?
20:43I know that I'm new at this, but if you want to make me feel like, like the anti-stud, mission accomplished.
20:50No, Patrick, no, Patrick, no, you're great.
20:54I'm just tired.
20:58I get it.
21:01I'll get you later.
21:02Oh, that was one hell of a smoking balcony.
21:12You didn't even have a cigarette.
21:14I can't say no to some good old secondhand city smoke.
21:20Hey, thanks for coming with me.
21:22I know it wasn't your first choice on how to spend an evening.
21:25I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have cracked my top 20.
21:27You're not trying to get out of this, are you?
21:33Oh, I know what that is.
21:35That's your place.
21:35Don't make me go to the opera cough.
21:37I know, because I developed it myself before my first opera.
21:41But then I actually went.
21:42And guess what happened?
21:44That's right.
21:45I loved it.
21:46And my cough went away.
21:49I'm fine.
21:51Good.
21:52Because you'd have to do a lot better than that.
22:07Oh, sorry.
22:08I was just looking for Ben.
22:11Ben's in there making friends with a caribou.
22:14So, you and Ben.
22:17Yeah.
22:18Me and Ben.
22:19You okay with that?
22:22Sure.
22:23I just don't want to see him get hurt.
22:26What?
22:27Now you're worried about Ben getting hurt?
22:31What Ben and I have is complicated, but we care about each other.
22:34I care about Ben.
22:36Good?
22:37Good.
22:40Just tell Ben.
22:41I'll come back later.
22:42Okay.
22:49It's showtime.
22:56Should we try to sneak our beers in?
23:01What is going on?
23:03Nothing.
23:04I'm fine.
23:07No, you're not.
23:09No.
23:10No, I'm not.
23:11I'm not.
23:11What is it taking so long?
23:19This is Anchorage, not New York.
23:21Nobody's been pushed in front of a subway.
23:22Mr. Slattery?
23:23Hey, it's about time.
23:25See you in here.
23:27Are you his wife?
23:28Oh, no.
23:28I'm his friend.
23:30I'm sorry.
23:31Immediate family only.
23:32Oh, but you don't understand we're very close.
23:34I mean, not in that way.
23:35But we could be.
23:35Not that I want that.
23:37Ma'am.
23:37Yeah.
23:37This is a hospital, not a confessional.
23:40That's okay, doctor.
23:41She's with me.
23:43I'm his brother.
23:45Ian.
23:49What are you doing here?
23:51I'm his emergency contact.
23:52Live ten blocks from here.
23:53What's your excuse?
23:54We were going to the opera.
23:56That worked out well.
23:57Is he going to be okay?
23:59Yeah.
23:59Yeah, he'll be fine.
24:00He's just sleeping off the medication.
24:04I've been worried.
24:05Ankerage is a long way to come for a date.
24:09Oh, we're not dating.
24:11We're friends.
24:14My brother doesn't usually put on the tux for a friend.
24:16Well, believe it or not, that's all we are.
24:21So then I could ask you out?
24:24Well, that would be kind of weird.
24:30Why?
24:30Because you're brothers, and one of you is currently passed out.
24:37So then he can't put up a fight, right?
24:43Hey.
24:45You okay?
24:47Hey, bro.
24:48That's one way to go.
25:07Keep giving her water so she's forced to take a pee break.
25:09I just don't want her to get dehydrated.
25:12How about hydrating your regulars?
25:15Hey, did you have a sec?
25:15I got a caribou and a drunk.
25:18You find me a moose who can cook, the place runs its off.
25:25So I have great news.
25:26I set up a sleepover for Matt.
25:29We can have the house to ourselves.
25:31Seriously?
25:31A whole night together with no gear shifts or incarcerations?
25:37Wow.
25:38I know.
25:39So, save the date.
25:41Three Saturdays from now.
25:42Wait.
25:43This isn't happening for three weeks?
25:45It's as soon as I can make it happen.
25:48I'm doing what I can here.
25:50I know.
25:50I know.
25:51It's just a screwy situation.
25:53Are you sure you have room for me in your life?
26:05Sarah, you give me something that I have not gotten in a very long time from Teresa.
26:11Yeah.
26:12Sex.
26:13Yes, okay.
26:16That.
26:18But also, a real friendship.
26:24Where I don't feel like I'm constantly letting you down or being judged.
26:30And I love our friendship.
26:31But when I start to think of it as something more, that's when it starts to let me down.
26:39It's over.
26:41What do you want?
26:43I want to know how you think you can be just friends with the woman you married.
26:49I'm trying.
26:51You're a good guy, Ben.
26:54A caribou has basically shut down your business and you still want to make sure she's not thirsty.
26:59I just don't want to get hurt.
27:01Why are you trying to make everyone else happy?
27:13How are you feeling?
27:16Much better, thanks.
27:18Is he going to be okay?
27:20I know I'm not the wife, but I can ask, right?
27:22He'll be fine.
27:23We should be able to release him shortly.
27:26So, he had an extrinsic asthma attack triggered by environmental allergens.
27:30You know, the city air does that to me sometimes.
27:33Why didn't you tell me that?
27:35Well, I didn't want to wreck your trip.
27:38Our trip?
27:40Smoking doesn't help either.
27:42I don't smoke.
27:43It doesn't take a doctor to smell the tobacco on your tux.
27:45So, if he had, say, gone out onto a smoking balcony at the opera for a couple of minutes?
27:51That'll do it.
27:51I am an awful, awful person.
27:56So, he almost killed him.
27:58Nice.
28:01It's okay.
28:01I'm also concerned, Mr. Slattery, about this.
28:06What is that?
28:07A bullet.
28:09What?
28:09Okay, we've ordered, so someone needs to tell me what happened.
28:29Now.
28:29My dad and I went camping, and this black bear came after me, and my dad shot at it, but
28:42he got me instead.
28:43You were shot by your father.
28:50I'm fine.
28:51Stop with the fine.
28:53You have a bullet in your chest for crying out loud.
28:57A bear mauled by that.
29:01So, he...
29:02Yeah.
29:03He died.
29:05Oh, my God.
29:08Are you okay?
29:09I wasn't there.
29:11I was never much of a camper.
29:13I'm more of a city guy.
29:14Yeah, you left for Anchorage as soon as you graduated high school and never looked back.
29:18He's just pissed because I didn't stick around.
29:20I'm not pissed.
29:22Just tell him a story.
29:24The city was a relief.
29:27I had enough wilderness tragedy.
29:28We weren't even there.
29:31Anyway, the bullet was too close to my heart to remove, so...
29:35So, you live with him?
29:37No, which other choice?
29:43Oh, those Wayans boys kill me.
29:47They really do look like women, huh?
29:52Sweetie, you loved this movie last time we screened it.
29:54Yeah, Mom, it's really funny.
29:59You haven't even touched this popcorn.
30:00What's wrong?
30:01Not enough butter?
30:03It's movie night.
30:04He used to love movie night.
30:06I was supposed to be with Annie at night.
30:08Oh.
30:09You two having problems?
30:11You can tell your best pal.
30:12She doesn't seem into me.
30:13Never liked her.
30:15Mom, we're not breaking up.
30:17We're just having growing pains, that's all.
30:21We'll work it out.
30:23I'm not sure you can, son.
30:25What do you mean?
30:28Mom, what are you doing?
30:31That girl snoring puts Amber Louise to shame.
30:34Rest that little doggy soul.
30:36How do you know?
30:37I hurt her today at the office with my own two ears.
30:41Stop.
30:42Stop.
30:43Stop.
30:43All right, fine.
30:44I will.
30:45But I don't think she can.
30:48Well, why wouldn't she tell me?
30:50I don't know if she knows you couldn't live with it.
30:53I figured you should know sooner than later.
30:57More popcorn?
31:05You feeling better?
31:06Yeah, food helps.
31:07But we should get on the road.
31:09You had a rough day.
31:11Maybe you should stay over tonight.
31:13We could see some museums tomorrow if you want.
31:18And we'll make sure to pick you up and inhale it, bro.
31:20All right.
31:20I don't need an inhaler.
31:23Can we get the check, please?
31:25You're welcome back anytime.
31:27I have a spare room.
31:28Under where I want to be.
31:30You too, Jack.
31:31I just don't know how long we can keep ignoring the caribou in the room.
31:49How long have you been sitting on that one, Jerome?
31:53A while now.
31:56But I ain't talking about that caribou.
31:59I'm talking about your messed up lady situation.
32:01I'm just trying to handle it carefully.
32:06Mm-hmm.
32:08You got one lady walking out on you, another lady walking all over you, and a caribou that's going nowhere.
32:15If I want your advice, I'll ask for it.
32:18You sure about that?
32:20I've had 12 beers tonight, and I'm seeing things clearer than you are.
32:24Why don't we call the park rangers?
32:28We can't let the caribou stay here all night.
32:35You're right.
32:37What are you doing?
32:40Something I should have done from the very start.
32:43Setting her free.
32:46She doesn't belong here, and she knows it.
32:49Then why doesn't she leave?
32:51Because she's been waiting for me to wake up.
33:01Come on, girl.
33:03This is my bar.
33:09This is your world.
33:12There you go.
33:13You're going home.
33:13Come on.
33:21Go on, Ella.
33:29Thanks.
33:30All right, guys.
33:30No, I'm going to get out of here before this gets like good.
33:33Be right back.
33:37Thanks.
33:37It's very gallant.
33:38Both of you.
33:39So, what's up with you guys?
33:51Nothing.
33:53Good.
33:56I mean, we slept together.
33:58That's what you're asking.
34:01According to her, you're just friends.
34:02Yeah, well, that's where we are right now.
34:04Oh.
34:06So, it wasn't any good?
34:07No, it was great.
34:11What, are you into her or not?
34:13Just stay away from her, okay?
34:16You're asking or telling?
34:18I'm just saying that she doesn't need you in her life right now.
34:23Let me get this straight.
34:24You don't want her, but no one else can have her.
34:26Is that it?
34:26The fact is, I don't blame you.
34:31You don't blame me for what?
34:32Come on.
34:34She is hot.
34:37Don't go there, man.
34:38I mean, look at her.
34:40Seriously.
34:41You got to admit, she is one hot piece of ass.
34:44You did good tonight.
35:14Setting her free.
35:15I didn't know you had it in you.
35:17Yeah.
35:21Teresa.
35:22Yeah?
35:24I want you to move out.
35:38Tell me what he said.
35:40No.
35:41Come on.
35:42It can't be that bad.
35:44No.
35:50He called you a hot piece of ass.
35:54You beat him up for that.
35:56Yeah, I did.
35:59For the record, most women don't mind being called that.
36:04Oh, thanks for telling me that now.
36:05So you don't think I'm a hot piece of a high knee?
36:16I think that he was being a jerk, okay?
36:18No.
36:19Thank you for standing up for me.
36:22And for going to the opera.
36:24Well, thanks for taking me to the hospital.
36:27Why didn't you tell me you had asthma?
36:28Would I have to tell you everything about me?
36:29Well, favorite color, no, but bullet in the chest, maybe.
36:38Jack?
36:39Yeah?
36:39I'm so sorry about what happened with your father.
36:48It's weird.
36:49You know, it's almost comforting to have the bullet there.
36:55I'm so close to your heart.
36:57I'm sorry you didn't get to go to your opera.
37:05Oh, please.
37:06I'm just glad you're okay.
37:10Okay.
37:12I think we just made it to chapter four.
37:16Hey.
37:28Hi.
37:31What is that?
37:33You promised you a laugh.
37:34It cost my heart.
37:36It's my retainer.
37:38I'm supposed to wear it every night for good tooth alignment and ideal bite relationship.
37:42You didn't have it the other night?
37:44Okay.
37:46I know.
37:48It's because I was embarrassed.
37:52Did your mom tell you about me?
37:54I don't care what she says.
37:56I'm going to love your snoring.
37:59You have no idea.
38:02I know, but I want to.
38:04I want us to know everything about each other.
38:06The good, the bad, and the ugly, and the loud.
38:10You sure?
38:11Sure, sure.
38:14Okie dokie, Smokey.
38:16Ow.
38:18Oh, sorry.
38:22Yeah, I'm going to take this off.
38:24I was just worried to prove a point.
38:27Get in here.
38:28Give me a kiss that will a dream on.
38:32Do I scare you?
38:33My imagination will drive the one that kills.
38:39Sweet love, I ask no more of this.
38:43Mmm.
38:45How bad.
38:46Marin marinara.
38:48Made extra special with a dash of truffle oil.
38:50Especially imported from Anchorage.
38:55Who says city girls can't cook?
38:56Well, it helps to have someone to cook for.
38:59Thanks.
39:01Oh.
39:02Please.
39:03I mean, you know, for coming home with me.
39:05I know Anchorage has a lot of appeal.
39:10Turns out Elmo has a lot of appeal, too.
39:16But if you really want to thank me...
39:18No more opera.
39:20No opera.
39:20How would you feel about me putting your name on my emergency card?
39:28Since all of my other names are 4,000 miles away.
39:33Okay.
39:34Sure.
39:35That's what your friends do, right?
39:45Friendship between a man and a woman is complicated.
39:50Especially if they've shared something more.
40:05And there are times when love can be stronger and even more rewarding.
40:12If it's built on the foundation of a really great friendship.
40:27But wherever it's headed, wherever it's been,
40:30being just friends doesn't have to mean settling for something less.
40:35Sometimes, it can be the brass ring after all.
40:42I'll kiss the bill I dream on.