- 6/28/2025
Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00Okay, so, the chef has a girlfriend, and guess who it is?
00:16All I do is play guessing games with the kids.
00:18Please, for my sanity, use your words.
00:20Camille, the beautiful blonde from the gallery?
00:23Beautiful and genuinely nice, which shouldn't be allowed.
00:25It's like, just choose one.
00:26Ugh, I really wish Gabrielle had told me that he had a girlfriend
00:28before I thanked him with my mouth.
00:30I thought you just kissed him.
00:31I did.
00:32Your English is as confusing as your French.
00:34Yeah, I feel stupid, in both languages.
00:37Look, Frenchmen are flirts.
00:39Just act normal when you see him.
00:41But I'm trying not to see him, which is kind of impossible
00:44when we live in the same building.
00:46I really like him, and I just thought that he...
00:49Ugh, I don't know what I thought.
00:51Bon, je vais un café, s'il vous plaît.
00:53Um, j'aime le café, le fruit, et un croissant avec le preservatif.
01:01Okay, there's a vending machine for that, in the men's room.
01:03What did I just say?
01:07Um, preservatif doesn't mean preserves.
01:09You just ordered a croissant with a side of condom.
01:12Oh my god, no, I don't want that!
01:13She's gonna bear back her breakfast.
01:15See, I can't get anything right.
01:17That's a common mistake.
01:18They're called fozemie.
01:20So, on crayon isn't crayon, it's pencil.
01:22On medicine isn't medicine, it's doctor.
01:25Fozemie, is that, like, fake friends?
01:27Yep, like you and Camille.
01:30I mean, you're gonna be friends with her,
01:31but just so you can stay close to her hot, hot boyfriend.
01:34I'm not doing that, and I'm trying to avoid her, too.
01:37Oh, good luck.
01:38Direct hit coming our way.
01:40Incoming!
01:41Hey!
01:42Hi!
01:43Oh, what?
01:44Camille!
01:45I'm so happy that we have the same café.
01:47You remember Mindy?
01:49Yes, of course.
01:49Of course.
01:50Oh, yay.
01:51I'm just grabbing some croissant for Gabriel.
01:54I can never get him out of bed anymore.
01:56Oh, sleepyhead.
01:58Best kind.
01:59So chic.
02:01But may I?
02:04Just, yeah.
02:05Oh.
02:07Like, you know, French way on the side.
02:11Oh, let me take a photo of you for your Emily in Paris account.
02:14You want to get in?
02:15Get in.
02:15Sure, it's okay.
02:16Yeah, sure.
02:17Okay.
02:19Say Amin.
02:20Amin.
02:22So cute.
02:25Oh.
02:25Hi.
02:26I will follow you so you can type in my baby.
02:29Cool.
02:31Oh, my God.
02:32You have so many followers.
02:34Oh, Emily knows how to make friends.
02:38You okay?
02:39You scarf too tight?
02:40Hot, damn.
02:43I got this bird.
02:45I got this bird.
02:47I got this bird.
02:49I'm sticking.
02:50My head is spinning.
02:53Ooh, the planet sea.
02:55I'm going to night.
02:56The door.
02:57Check this out.
02:58Dure Cosmetics just DMed me on Instagram.
03:01They invited me to their influencer lunch today.
03:03You? An influencer?
03:04I know. They must have mistaken me for someone else.
03:07But I love Dure. They were the first lip gloss I ever bought.
03:10Well, not actually bought. My friend Cindy stole it from Target.
03:13She's a teacher now.
03:15Sounds right.
03:16Oh, it's at the Hotel de Vreux? Is that good?
03:19No. None of this is good.
03:21We don't speak of Dure in this office. There used to be a client.
03:24What happened?
03:27We don't speak of it, Emily.
03:31Okay.
03:33Sylvie, just curious...
03:39Customary to knock, wait for a reply, then enter.
03:48Busy?
03:48I just noticed that you don't have a cosmetics company on your roster.
03:52What an illuminating insight.
03:54Did you ever have one?
03:55Bobby Brown, Laura Mercier, Dure...
03:59A representative from Haston's Luxury Beds is coming in tomorrow, and I expect you to have great campaign ideas.
04:07Of course, of course. But can I just go back to the cosmetics question?
04:10No.
04:11Okay.
04:22Bring the Eiffel Tower to bed.
04:25Huh?
04:26For Hastons. That could be the slogan.
04:28They're Swedish, so using a Paris landmark may not...
04:31No, no, no, no, no, no. Not the Eiffel Tower. The Eiffel Tower.
04:37He means the sex position.
04:38The woman is on all fours, and the two men, one in front, one in back, and they, uh...
04:47How do you say clap?
04:48High five.
04:50Wait, why do they high five?
04:51To make shape.
04:54Eiffel Tower.
04:55Please put your hands down.
04:57But then it's on a London bridge. Not as fun.
05:00All right, Sevoire.
05:01Okay. Well, I would love to stay and educate you on workplace harassment, but I've got a lunch.
05:09You're going?
05:10To the event that dare not speak its name, yes. I just need a one-on-one with Olivia Thompson.
05:14Their CMO? You're insane.
05:16Well, they think I'm an influencer. Maybe I can influence them to stay at Sevoire.
05:19Oh, my God, I'm Emu.
05:31Hi.
05:32Hi, mon amour.
05:34Ça va?
05:35Wow, what a cute dog. I love buildings.
05:39Well, you should follow him. Is Kashmir a good boy on Instagram? And he just hit 100,000 followers.
05:44Thank you, my love. Do you have one for Kashmir?
05:47But of course.
05:48Yeah, you know he'd get jealous.
05:52Name.
05:54Bonjour. I'm Emily in Paris, and I was invited on Instagram.
05:57Everyone was.
06:00Oh, um, can I get a big one like Kashmir?
06:03Oh, let me check.
06:06Not enough followers.
06:07So now, please integrate the product in your social media content.
06:11We expect a minimum of five bucks.
06:13Raise your tiny reach. Make it ten.
06:16Oh, I'm on it.
06:16I'll give you quantity and quality.
06:19Um, can you point me in the direction of Olivia Thompson?
06:21She's about to speak.
06:23Merci.
06:25Next.
06:25Thank you all for being here.
06:32We are thrilled to be sharing this season's incredible product range with such global tastemakers.
06:41Enjoy lunch, and please remember to tag Jure in your posts so that we can track your social media impressions.
06:48Have fun.
06:56Miss Thompson, can I please have a moment?
06:58May I help you, Miss Emily in Paris?
07:01Bonjour.
07:02Again.
07:03I'm really here to speak to Olivia.
07:05No, no, no.
07:05If you want her attention, I suggest you post.
07:11Trivia.
07:12With macadamia butter and jojoba oil, Doray is smudge-proof.
07:28Even when you're very hungry.
07:34Doray is smudge-proof.
07:37Even when you're very hungry.
07:39Emily in Paris.
07:41I like her.
07:42She's clever.
07:44Yeah.
07:44She's eating the decor.
07:46Where do we know her from?
07:48Ah, I know exactly who she is.
07:52I was 13 when I first tried Doray's lip gloss.
07:55Funny story.
07:56Oh, pardon.
07:57Can you give me some space?
08:02Whoa.
08:03Swipe up and enter Doray for 20% off my anti-fungal yoga pants.
08:09Celia Splits.
08:11Wow.
08:12And, ow.
08:15Celia Splits?
08:16Um, I just tagged you.
08:17I'm Emily in Paris.
08:18Oh, don't piggyback on my brand.
08:21Vale?
08:21Adios, gracias.
08:28Olivia, we see you now.
08:30¿Cómo?
08:32Pearl?
08:33Perdona?
08:34She only has 20,000 followers.
08:37I have two million.
08:38Dos millones.
08:39¿Lo entiendes o te hago un mapa?
08:41Emily in Paris.
08:43You created a meme using the Vaja Jeune post.
08:46You even got Brigitte Macron to retweet you.
08:49A Daily Mail called it a retwap.
08:50A very proud moment for me.
08:52It's really nice to finally meet you, Olivia.
08:54Likewise.
08:55Some creative content today.
08:57And your product knowledge is first raised.
08:59You're quite the brand ambassador.
09:01Well, it's easy when you love the brand.
09:02And this was a really great event.
09:04I'm glad you're enjoying it.
09:06We saw you eat the wrong.
09:09So, what agency do you use?
09:11Oh, we don't anymore.
09:12Agencies are overpriced and antiquated.
09:14Now we prefer to use influencers like you.
09:16The future of marketing.
09:17I actually have a master's in marketing.
09:21And I think that I could do much more for you than this.
09:25Really?
09:26Such as?
09:27Olivia, they are waiting for you at the Dermabrasion Station.
09:31I would love to tell you more about it.
09:34Could I...
09:35Could we meet later?
09:36Tomorrow.
09:37Lunch.
09:37Lucien will set it up.
09:38Oh, bonsoir.
09:52Hi.
09:53You're not working?
09:55I'm working from home.
09:57You didn't move to Paris to sit alone in your room.
10:00Oh, I...
10:00We're not taking no for an answer.
10:02Right, Gabrielle?
10:03We rarely do.
10:04We are going someplace really nice.
10:08You will love it.
10:26I know, oh yeah, oh yeah.
10:27I know, oh yeah.
10:29I know, oh yeah.
10:31I know, oh yeah.
10:33I know, oh yeah.
10:37I know, oh yeah.
10:40I know, oh yeah.
10:49Wow, this is incredible.
10:51Starry night, one of my favorites.
10:54Mine too.
10:57Did you know Van Gogh painted it while having a very fresh bite down?
11:01Uh, no, I, uh, I did not.
11:05Well, he was in an asylum in Saint-Rémy-de-Provence.
11:10And this was his view.
11:13Well, I guess that explains his crazy genius.
11:18Let's lie down.
11:20Oh, okay, sure.
11:36I love sleeping under the stars.
11:39Remember the last time we slept outside?
11:42Yeah.
11:44Where'd you go to sleep?
11:46So you guys are campers, huh?
11:49Hmm.
11:51Never mind.
11:53Uh, this is incredible.
11:56I feel like I'm actually in the painting.
12:00Daniel, it's him.
12:02Excuse me.
12:08I really like her.
12:10She likes you too.
12:12I wouldn't have kissed you if I knew you had a girlfriend.
12:15It's okay.
12:16You didn't know.
12:17Well, why didn't you tell me?
12:18I didn't know you were going to kiss me.
12:21You did kiss me back.
12:25It is a normal reaction now.
12:27I guess.
12:28Well, I just thought that you felt...
12:32Ugh.
12:33It doesn't matter now.
12:35So, clearly it was just me and I made it all over my head.
12:40So, forget it.
12:42I forgot what?
12:43The...
12:44The kiss in your kitchen.
12:46I don't remember.
12:48It must not have been very good.
12:51Well, it wasn't unmemorable, in fact.
12:56Then it's forgotten.
12:57We will just go back to being neighbors who I've never kissed.
13:00It's all we ever were.
13:11In London, Rome and New York, huge crowds watched Tilda Swinton sleep in a box.
13:18Why?
13:19Because she can make anything interesting.
13:21Yes.
13:22But also because watching the act of sleep is intoxicating.
13:28We watch our babies sleep.
13:31We watch our lovers sleep.
13:33And now, as Parisians window shop on the Champs-Elysées, they'll see two gorgeous models sleep
13:42and spend the whole day on a Haston's bed.
13:46An unflinching but flattering life portrait of luxury.
13:52Hmm.
13:53I like, but not love.
13:55I feel like I've seen it before.
13:58Do you have any other ideas?
14:00Bring the Eiffel Tower.
14:01No.
14:08May I?
14:09If you must.
14:11Our dreams transport us to magical places that we try to capture in film, music, and art.
14:18But we only dream when we sleep deeply.
14:21The superior quality of Haston's beds allows us to dream our best dreams.
14:25But why must that only be in our bedrooms?
14:27Why can't it be under the stars?
14:30We should be able to fall asleep anywhere.
14:32Let's harness the power of social media and ask people to come sleep with us.
14:36Stage the bed in the most irresistibly Instagrammable spots in this beautiful city.
14:41The Jardin de Luxembourg.
14:42The Louvre.
14:43And post photos of real people, not just models, sleeping and dreaming.
14:49All thanks to Haston's.
14:53Perhaps even under the Eiffel Tower.
14:56High five?
14:57No.
15:05I am so glad you were at our event, Emily.
15:10You are the best type of influencer.
15:13One that doesn't realize the influence they have over others.
15:16Well, you know I love DeRay.
15:17I do.
15:21What do you think?
15:23Oh.
15:25No.
15:26No, no, no.
15:28I'm sorry, Olivia, but I can't be your brand ambassador.
15:32You're under contract with someone else?
15:34Well, yeah.
15:36Kind of.
15:38You see, I had a bit of an unfair advantage at your lunch.
15:43I'm a marketing executive at Savoir, and I think you should come back.
15:48Savoir.
15:50This was a very clever way to get a meeting.
15:53Well, we'd be very clever for DeRay.
15:55I fired your agency.
15:57They're a very expensive dinosaur.
15:59Expensive, yes.
16:01But you get what you pay for.
16:04And it's different now.
16:06I work there.
16:08Does Sylvie Grateau?
16:10She does.
16:12And it's not that different.
16:14Those influencers at your lunch didn't care about your brand.
16:16I respect what they do, but they're driven by self-promotion and swag bags.
16:23We could promote DeRay more creatively and intelligently than they ever could.
16:29You're wrong, Emily.
16:30You could be more successful as an influencer.
16:35Again, I'm...
16:37I'm not an influencer.
16:39Well, you're clearly under the influence of this city.
16:42You're high on Paris.
16:44And your followers are falling for that.
16:48We're keeping our marketing in-house.
16:50But this has been, uh, interesting.
16:54Look after yourself, Emily.
16:55I know Sylvie won't.
16:57Emily!
16:59Yes?
17:01Is this the American way to over-promise and under-deliver?
17:03Excuse me?
17:05Clara from Hastens wants to do your outdoor bed idea.
17:09Now she expects their bed to be in Le Louvre.
17:11So maybe you can find a nice spot for the mattress under the Mona Lisa.
17:15Good luck.
17:16We can figure that out.
17:17This is great news, though.
17:18Oh, is it?
17:20Because you already look quite busy.
17:22They invited me as an influencer.
17:24And you thought going was a good idea?
17:26I was hoping to win them back.
17:28What makes you think we want them back?
17:30If you're their new arbiter of taste, we want nothing to do with them.
17:32Companies hire Savoir to raise their standards.
17:34And I think we're going to be a good idea.
17:36We're going to be a good idea.
17:38We're going to be a good idea.
17:40We're going to be a good idea.
17:42We're going to be a good idea.
17:43Companies hire Savoir to raise their standards, not lower them.
17:47Sylvie, we're on the same side.
17:49It's not you personally.
17:50It's everything you stand for.
17:52You're the enemy of luxury because luxury is defined by sophistication and taste,
17:57not by Emily in Paris.
18:00Your social media is a problem for us.
18:03I don't think you understand its value.
18:05Oh, well, I think I do.
18:06You work for Duré for free, right?
18:08How does that look to the brands that actually pay us to represent them?
18:11Okay, so what do you want me to do?
18:16Delete your account.
18:18Hmm?
18:28That's censorship.
18:29I know.
18:30She can't force you to delete your social media.
18:32Get your dad's lawyers involved.
18:33My dad doesn't have a lawyer.
18:34He breeds Weimaraners.
18:36Hmm.
18:37Yeah, you have to delete it.
18:39Gimme.
18:41Oh, and you dropped your crepe.
18:43Hashtag-o crepe.
18:46I'm not sure who I am in this city without Emily in Paris.
18:49Huh.
18:50Ask Camille.
18:51She's liked every one of your posts.
18:53Oh, I know.
18:54She's like the nicest, coolest, French person I know.
19:00I thought that was Gabriel.
19:01No, he's just the hottest.
19:02Uh-huh.
19:03Male.
19:04And a problem I can't solve tonight.
19:07But one that I can is saying goodbye to my account.
19:11So, one last story.
19:13Ugh.
19:14Let's send it off with a bang.
19:15Chin Chin.
19:16Mm.
19:17Mm.
19:19Come on.
19:20No.
19:21No.
19:22No.
19:23No.
19:24No.
19:25No.
19:26No.
19:27No.
19:28No.
19:29No.
19:33No.
19:35No.
19:36and after 90 minutes of being on hold they finally transferred me to the permit department
19:57only to say pas possible, pas possible, pas possible, pas possible. Everything is pas possible, the French motto.
20:08Well it turns out the only person who is able to put a bed in the Louvre is Beyoncé.
20:15Yeah, duh, Beyoncé is worth far more than the Mona Lisa.
20:18I thought you'd like it. It was voted the prettiest street in Paris and is referred to as
20:31Ruelle qui va au bout, which means the road which leads to the end.
20:36Ah, it's perfect, it's perfect. One last one. Let's do it. One last one.
20:58You're out late. You're out late. Just close the restaurant. 5213 like an upside down pyramid.
21:11After you. No, please, I insist. I insist.
21:28It wasn't just you.
21:43I felt it too.
21:49Good night, Gabrielle.
21:59Yes, of course, of course.
22:03Emily, bring me your phone.
22:06Sure.
22:07Show me the last picture of your post-it.
22:09Uh, I can't. I shut it down like you asked.
22:10We reactivate it.
22:12I don't understand. You said...
22:14Fine.
22:14Oh, that's Place Delida, right?
22:18Yes. What is this about?
22:20Clara, that Nordic witch from Haston's call, then she wants to stage the bed there.
22:25That's...
22:26Yeah, I'm not finished.
22:27Okay.
22:27She wants you to post there first.
22:29Why me?
22:31Yeah, well, I've been asking that question ever since you arrived.
22:34I assume it's to draw a crowd and encourage others like those followers of yours to post from there too.
22:40Well, sure, but what do you mean to do about my Instagram account?
22:45Well, I guess you're an influencer now, but only for our clients. You win.
22:52We're on the same side.
22:53Yeah, right.
23:05Emily?
23:05Oh, the Luz. Come.
23:10What is this?
23:11It's a social media installation for Haston's beds.
23:14They're one of our biggest clients, and I thought of the idea after our night at Van Gogh.
23:19You inspired me.
23:20I did?
23:21Mm-hmm.
23:22So I wanted you to be the first to see it. I'm calling it Dormir à la Belle Étoile.
23:27To sleep under the stars. Emily, your French is getting better.
23:31Well, that's because I have French friends now.
23:32Yes, well, I was relieved to hear from you, you know.
23:37You seemed a little tense when you left the other night.
23:41It's Gabriel, isn't it?
23:44Uh, what do you, what do you mean?
23:46Just that. I mean, I know he can be unfriendly before you get to know him,
23:50but given time, he will warm up to you.
23:55If you say so.
23:57I'm so glad he has a nice neighbor like you.
23:59I hope that three of us can be friends.
24:03Me too.
24:04So, do you want to get in bed with me?
24:06I thought you'd never ask.
24:11Okay.
24:13Cheese!
24:16So comfy.
24:29Let's go.
24:35We'll keep going.
24:42We'll keep going.
24:42To be continued...
25:12Transcription by CastingWords
25:42Transcription by CastingWords
26:12Transcription by CastingWords
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