00:04Hey, Johnny, what's up? How are you? This is Jubal from Brook and Jubal in the Morning.
00:08Seriously?
00:09Yeah, what's up, man? How are you?
00:11Wait, really?
00:14I'm good.
00:15So you listen to the show?
00:18Yeah.
00:19Awesome.
00:19Yeah, I listen to it every morning.
00:20Sweet, thank you, man. I appreciate it.
00:22Then you've probably heard the second date update before.
00:24Is that why you're calling me?
00:26Yes, that is exactly why I'm calling you, Johnny.
00:28Okay, okay, I know how this works. I know you have someone on the other line, and just tell Leslie that I never want to see her again and that she's a f***ing b***h.
00:38Whoa!
00:39Well, that's interesting.
00:40I can tell her that. Sure, Johnny.
00:43Hello?
00:45Johnny's gone.
00:46Did he hang up?
00:47That Leslie girl sounds terrible.
00:49Who's Leslie?
00:50I don't know.
00:51Kayla, is there a Leslie that you didn't tell us about?
00:54What?
00:55Do you know who Leslie is?
00:57I have no clue who Leslie is.
00:59It has to be some other girl that he's doing online dating with.
01:02Or something.
01:03Yeah.
01:03But, like, who would even say that?
01:06I have no idea.
01:06So he didn't bring up a Leslie on your date or anything?
01:10No.
01:10Okay.
01:11All right, well, I'm going to see if I can get him back on the phone then and let him know that Leslie's not trying to get a hold of him.
01:17Kayla is.
01:18All right?
01:19Okay, hang on.
01:26Look, I told you before, I don't want to do this, okay?
01:29Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, I'm not calling on behalf of somebody named Leslie.
01:34No, Dubu, I know that you're, I know that this is what you do.
01:37Like, I know this is like a thing that you guys do and I just don't want to, I don't want to be a part of it.
01:41I'm not, Johnny, I promise I'm not messing with you.
01:43There's somebody other than Leslie that wanted to do a second date update.
01:46Yeah, we don't know who that is.
01:47We don't even know who Leslie is at all.
01:50She sounds terrible, though.
01:53I don't, I don't f***ing believe you guys.
01:57Okay, Johnny, Johnny, how about this?
01:59Okay, okay, Johnny, hang on.
02:00Don't hang up yet.
02:02I'm calling because a girl named Kayla wanted to get a hold of you.
02:06Nobody named Leslie at all.
02:08Kayla?
02:09Yeah, do you remember going out on a date with somebody named Kayla?
02:11Oh my God, yeah.
02:14It was about three weeks ago, three, four weeks ago, something like that?
02:18Yeah, that's what this is about.
02:20That's just from Kayla.
02:20Yes, this is about somebody named Kayla, not somebody named Leslie.
02:24Oh my God, is she listening to this?
02:26Kayla?
02:26No, Kayla is gone.
02:29Because, dude, I mean, we called for a second date update.
02:31She wanted to go out with you again and then she heard you call somebody named Leslie a p***h.
02:37And she hung up and isn't interested in doing the second date update anymore.
02:41But I want to know who Leslie is now.
02:44Me too.
02:45Is it like some stalker you have or something?
02:47No, no, you really, like, for free, honestly, you really don't.
02:50Like, it's a long story and it was not a good time.
02:54Did Leslie happen before the Kayla date or after the Kayla date?
02:58It was after Kayla.
02:59Like, honestly, I just want to forget about the whole thing.
03:02It was really s***y and, like, I just want to move past it, you know?
03:06You don't have to tell me, but maybe if you do tell me, then I could explain to Kayla about the situation with Leslie and help her understand that so that maybe she wants to go out with you again.
03:14Yeah.
03:16I mean, like, I could tell you guys, but, like, I don't want you to go and tell Kayla because it's, like, it's like a really weird story.
03:25Like, I don't want her to know that that happened to me.
03:28I won't.
03:29I don't know.
03:30I won't tell her specifics about this Leslie girl.
03:32And she's got to be understanding.
03:34I mean, she said that she's gone on some pretty horrible dates from the same site you guys met on, too.
03:39Yeah.
03:39Okay.
03:41We, at this bar, we drank way too much.
03:44We wound up hooking up in a Wendy's bathroom.
03:47What?
03:49And then she f***ing bit me.
03:52Okay?
03:53Wait, she bit you when you're in the Wendy's bathroom?
03:57She bit me.
03:58I got stitches for it.
04:00And that's, I'm just going to leave it there.
04:02Where did she bite you?
04:04You don't need to know.
04:05And so, she bit you so bad that you had to get stitches.
04:09Yeah.
04:09So, you see why I don't want to f***ing talk to her, right?
04:12I guess, yeah.
04:12Seems like you could have seen that one coming if you're hooking up with a girl in a Wendy's bathroom.
04:17Yeah.
04:18She's f***ing crazy.
04:19And now she keeps calling me and texting me.
04:21She's like, won't leave me alone now.
04:23So, that's what happened.
04:24Does that answer your f***ing question?
04:26Yes.
04:27It definitely does.
04:28That's interesting.
04:29So, I won't give Kayla all those details.
04:33You're welcome.
04:33I won't give them to her because you actually just did.
04:36Kayla is still on the phone listening.
04:38What?
04:39Oh, my God.
04:40Oh, my God.
04:40Oh, my God.
04:42So awkward.
04:43Dude, you told me she wasn't on the f***ing phone.
04:46Did I say that?
04:47Yeah, you did.
04:48You did.
04:49You lied.
04:49Oh, my God.
04:50Sorry, Johnny.
04:51Yeah.
04:52What the hell?
04:54Is she serious?
04:55Are you serious?
04:55Yeah.
04:56Is this a story?
04:56Are you serious?
04:57Are you saying that this actually happened?
05:00Yeah, that actually happened.
05:01And, like, it does suck.
05:04Like, I had to get f***ing stitches because of this girl.
05:07So, do you, like, want me to feel sorry for you?
05:10I thought you were a nice guy.
05:12I am a nice guy.
05:14I didn't bite her.
05:15She bit me.
05:17I don't think that's what Kayla means, Johnny.
05:19I think Kayla means more, like, hooking up in a fast food restaurant bathroom with someone
05:24that you just met and everything.
05:25That was not my decision.
05:27If you think that I was in charge of that choice, then you are sadly mistaken.
