- 6/13/2025
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00:00:00Previously on Desperate Housewives
00:00:03She was his wife, he deserves to have all the facts.
00:00:07She abandoned her husband and her son, and I'll never forgive her.
00:00:12It's the age-old question, isn't it?
00:00:14How much do we really want to know about our neighbors?
00:00:16We're going to cancel the meeting with that divorce lawyer,
00:00:19and we're going to find ourselves a marriage counselor.
00:00:21I'm Mike Delfino.
00:00:22Susan Meyer, I live across the street.
00:00:24If you want to date him, you're going to have to ask him out.
00:00:26I keep hoping he'll ask me out.
00:00:27I really hate the way you talk to me.
00:00:30I really hate that I spent $15,000 on your diamond necklace,
00:00:33but I'm learning to deal with it.
00:00:34Do you love him?
00:00:35I do.
00:00:36Then why are we here?
00:00:38Why are we doing this?
00:00:40Because I don't want to wake up one morning with a sudden urge to blow my brains out.
00:00:48After I died, I began to surrender the parts of myself that were no longer necessary.
00:00:54My desires, beliefs, ambitions, doubts.
00:00:57Every trace of my humanity was discarded.
00:01:02I discovered when moving through eternity, it helps to travel lightly.
00:01:07In fact, I held on to only one thing, my memory.
00:01:13It's astonishing to look back on the world I left behind.
00:01:17I remember it all.
00:01:19Every single detail.
00:01:24Like my friend, Brie Vandekamp.
00:01:28I remember the easy confidence of her smile.
00:01:32The gentle elegance of her hands.
00:01:34The refined warmth of her voice.
00:01:38Bye.
00:01:42But what I remember most about Brie...
00:01:45Rex?
00:01:45Wasn't that a lovely...
00:01:46...was a look of fear in her eyes.
00:01:50Brie had started to realize her world was unraveling.
00:01:53And for a woman who despised loose ends, that was unacceptable.
00:02:00Rex!
00:02:01Rex!
00:02:01You need to get up.
00:02:02It's not even light out.
00:02:04Please hurry.
00:02:05If the kids see you sleeping down here, they're going to start asking questions.
00:02:08Let them ask.
00:02:09I don't care anymore.
00:02:10Well, I care.
00:02:12They don't need to be burdened with our marital problems.
00:02:14And while we're working things out, the least we can do is try to keep up appearances.
00:02:18Oh, yeah.
00:02:19Appearances.
00:02:20Keep forgetting about appearances.
00:02:23Oh, Rex, you look so tired.
00:02:25I didn't sleep.
00:02:27This damn thing is so uncomfortable.
00:02:29Oh.
00:02:30Well, why don't you move back upstairs and sleep in our bed?
00:02:33We're in marriage counseling, Brie.
00:02:35I think that would confuse things.
00:02:36It's just, I miss you.
00:02:40I know you do.
00:02:43Of course, if I didn't start getting some sleep pretty soon, I'd be forced to move back upstairs
00:02:47out of sheer exhaustion.
00:02:54Yes, Brie was afraid of many things.
00:02:57But if there was one thing she wasn't afraid of,
00:03:01it was a challenge.
00:03:06Oh, yeah.
00:03:09Oh, yeah.
00:03:11Oh.
00:03:11Oh, yeah.
00:03:13Oh.
00:03:22Oh.
00:03:22Oh.
00:03:23Oh.
00:03:24The day on Wisteria Lane began like any other.
00:03:51With a cup of coffee and the morning paper, and while Annette read the business section and Gabrielle studied the fall collections and researched for decorating ideas, Susan scanned the front page and saw something that caught her eye.
00:04:21Well, it's about time.
00:04:31Be nice. I come bearing snacks.
00:04:33Lynette, these cards are sticky.
00:04:36I know. Preston used the three of diamonds to scoop Jim out of a jar.
00:04:40Well, we're just thankful we have 49 cards to play with.
00:04:42Hello.
00:04:43Hey.
00:04:44So, Susan, I was just telling the girls I want to throw a dinner party.
00:04:47Really?
00:04:48Yes. How long have we all lived on this street? We've never done a big group thing.
00:04:51I think it's a great idea. Paul never likes to have people over, but to heck with him. I'm doing it.
00:04:55So, when is this shindig?
00:04:57How about a month from tonight? That would be the 16th. Good for everyone? Works for me. Should we all make something?
00:05:02Oh, no. No. This is my party. I've been wanting to have everyone over for years.
00:05:06Oh, I'm so happy we're finally doing this. It's gonna be so much fun.
00:05:10Hey!
00:05:12I know. They're dinner.
00:05:15How could we have all forgotten about this?
00:05:18We didn't exactly forget. It's just usually when the hostess dies, the party's off.
00:05:21Annette!
00:05:22I'm not being flip. I'm just pointing out a reality.
00:05:25Mary Alice was so excited about it. So sad.
00:05:28I think we should go through with it.
00:05:30Really? Wouldn't that be in poor taste?
00:05:33No. It's sort of a way to honor Mary Alice. It was so important to her.
00:05:36We could all use a fun night.
00:05:38Well, good. Because I have some new flatware that I've just been dying to show off.
00:05:42Lynette?
00:05:43I'm in.
00:05:44I'll make braised lamb shanks.
00:05:45I'm still in.
00:05:46So, how many will I be cooking for?
00:05:48Seven. Three couples and Susan. Does that sound right?
00:05:51No, it sounds very, very wrong.
00:05:53Is there somebody you'd like to invite?
00:06:05I have an idea.
00:06:08A dinner party. Honey, I may be working late. The Dillman proposal's a complete mess.
00:06:14No, no. You promised to be home every night this week.
00:06:16I'll try, but I can't guarantee anything.
00:06:18This is business.
00:06:19Says the prince as he rides off into the sunset. Boy, do the movies ever get that wrong.
00:06:24You know what your problem is? You're very tense. You should go to a spa or go shopping.
00:06:28Find a way to relax.
00:06:42Hello?
00:06:43Where are you?
00:06:44Algebra.
00:06:45You three at four?
00:06:47I'm not sure I got track after school.
00:06:51We'll get here as fast as you can. My husband says I need to relax.
00:06:55You, uh, want me to keep my gym clothes on like last time?
00:06:58If you would. Please.
00:07:01A dinner party?
00:07:02Yeah. It'll be fun. Bree's cooking. Everyone's fine.
00:07:04You know what? I haven't even had a chance to unpack yet, honey. I just, uh, I just need to chill out for the next few days.
00:07:10Oh, Tom. There'll be liquor. And hors d'oeuvres. And grown-ups without children. And silverware. Remember silverware?
00:07:19Honey, can you take this in for me?
00:07:21Have you heard anything I just said?
00:07:23Yeah, I'm sorry. I'm just, I'm wiped out. Three cities in six days. My head is just pounding. I'm not ready for a dinner party.
00:07:29I already got a sitter.
00:07:30Can you cancel her?
00:07:32Please? Look, let's just stay in tomorrow night. We can get a bottle of wine and rent a video and I just want to hang out with my best gal. That's all.
00:07:43I was looking so forward to a night out.
00:07:45I know, sweetie. I'm sorry, but I, I'm beat. I mean, do you remember what it's like to work a 60-hour week?
00:07:57A dinner party? Do I have to go?
00:08:00Well, given that we're hosting it, I'd say so. By the way, you won't be drinking at this party.
00:08:05Well, why is that?
00:08:06Because when you drink, you get chatty. No one needs to know that we're seeing Dr. Goldfein.
00:08:10You know, if you spent half as much time working on our problems as you do covering them...
00:08:14Not a drop.
00:08:15You know, this, this is ridiculous. And this whole thing about us taking tennis lessons?
00:08:19Well, the nurses at your office may start wondering why you're disappearing three times a week. Tennis lessons are a plausible alibi.
00:08:25So these tennis lessons we're taking, how are we doing?
00:08:30My backhand's improving immensely, but you're still having problems with your serve.
00:08:35Of course.
00:08:37A dinner party?
00:08:38It's tomorrow night, so if you could just keep Julie an extra day.
00:08:41Fine, but that's all. Brandy and I leave Sunday for a week up at the cabin.
00:08:44What cabin?
00:08:45Brandy wanted someplace where we could get away.
00:08:48Escrow just closed yesterday.
00:08:51You can afford a cabin, but you can't scrape up child support?
00:08:55The check is in the mail.
00:08:57No, it's not.
00:08:59I found my dental guard. I'm ready.
00:09:04Stop fighting.
00:09:05We are being as nice as we possibly can to one another.
00:09:08Like I said, stop fighting.
00:09:19Excuse me, Brandy. Do you mind?
00:09:26Oh, okay.
00:09:27Wait. Susan, you're right there. You can pick it up.
00:09:30I could, but she's the one who threw it.
00:09:34Come on, don't be petulant. Just pick up the stupid can.
00:09:37No. I can pick it up.
00:09:39Honey, stay out of this.
00:09:44Fine.
00:09:46This is so typical.
00:09:50Oh, sorry. Was that petulant too?
00:09:52You know what? You pick up the damn can yourself.
00:09:54Yeah, well, you just go to hell.
00:10:01You want me to pick it up?
00:10:04Ah.
00:10:13Mrs. Warmington said she looked for Mom's obituary and couldn't find it.
00:10:17Did you put one in?
00:10:19I've had other things in my mind, Zack.
00:10:23But how could you not do that?
00:10:24People are going to think we didn't care about her.
00:10:26I doubt people would give it much thought.
00:10:28Don't worry about it.
00:10:29You never talk about her.
00:10:31If she hasn't even been dead a month, then it's like you've totally forgotten she ever existed.
00:10:34It's a little early for this kind of talk.
00:10:39Maybe when you die, I won't put in an obituary.
00:10:43That would be your choice to make.
00:10:49Assuming you outlive me.
00:10:57Mom, it's no big deal.
00:10:58Carlos and I are driving in for the baptism.
00:11:00Problem solved.
00:11:02Okay.
00:11:03Fine.
00:11:04You go with Aunt Maria, and I will take Nana to church.
00:11:08Take your clothes off.
00:11:10Uh-huh.
00:11:11Okay, I gotta go, Mom.
00:11:13Yes, right now.
00:11:15Okay, you can give me directions later.
00:11:17Bye.
00:11:18Hi, how was school?
00:11:19Got an A-minus in my biology exam.
00:11:21I did.
00:11:23Well, let's see what you've learned.
00:11:28Who's that?
00:11:30I don't know.
00:11:32Hey, you!
00:11:41So, did Mike say anything?
00:11:42No, but God, you should've seen the look on his face.
00:11:44I'm sure it's not that bad.
00:11:46I mean, he's coming to the party, right?
00:11:48Yeah, I left three messages.
00:11:50No, he's not gonna come.
00:11:51Big surprise.
00:11:52I did everything but foam at the mouth.
00:11:54God, I hate when I get that way.
00:11:56It's like every time I get within 10 feet of Carl,
00:11:58I just become this monster.
00:12:00You know what?
00:12:01It's not gonna change until you resolve your issues with that man.
00:12:03What, you mean forgive him?
00:12:05You know, I've lived with this bitterness so long,
00:12:06I think I'd be lonely without it.
00:12:08Honey, get a pet.
00:12:10See ya.
00:12:14Son of a...
00:12:15It's a business meeting.
00:12:17It's a frat party.
00:12:19Regional manager, corporate manager, head of sales.
00:12:21Margarita, cigar, sombrero.
00:12:24Honey, what do you want me to do?
00:12:25Sit around the hotel the whole time watching cable?
00:12:27No.
00:12:29But when I say, we've been invited to a party,
00:12:31don't whine about your exhausting 60 hour week.
00:12:34Put on your dancing shoes and take the mother of your children out for a good time.
00:12:38Fine, you know what, you're right.
00:12:40Let's go to that party.
00:12:41Can't. I already cancelled the sitter.
00:12:44Okay, well, we'll throw the next one.
00:12:46Throw a dinner party?
00:12:47I don't even have time to wash my face.
00:12:52Now, you know what?
00:12:54I'm gonna go to this one.
00:12:56You can stay home and babysit the kids.
00:12:58I can handle that.
00:13:15Gabrielle spent her morning searching for the mysterious little girl.
00:13:19Sadly for her,
00:13:21the mystery was solved a bit too quickly.
00:13:25Hey!
00:13:27What's going on?
00:13:28Have you met Ashley?
00:13:30Found it!
00:13:31Babe, this is Sheila Bukowski, our new neighbor.
00:13:32They just moved into the Miller's old house.
00:13:33My daughter left her ball in your yard.
00:13:34I'm so sorry.
00:13:35Oh, oh, no, no problem.
00:13:37Nice to meet you, Ashley.
00:13:39She's shy. She doesn't say much.
00:13:40Yeah, but I can see her little mind working away.
00:13:41Nice meeting you.
00:13:42Come on, Ashley.
00:13:43Come on, Ashley.
00:14:11Come on, Ashley.
00:14:38Private sessions?
00:14:39I don't understand.
00:14:41Why do we need private sessions?
00:14:42Private sessions allow us to work on the personal issues of both partners.
00:14:46Oh, well, I don't have any personal issues.
00:14:48My only issue is that my husband wants to leave me,
00:14:50and how can I work on that if he's not in the room?
00:14:52There are things I need to discuss with Dr. Goldfein,
00:14:55and I can't have you there.
00:14:57Why?
00:14:58I'm your wife.
00:14:59You can say anything in front of me.
00:15:01All we need is a few more sessions, and I'm sure we can...
00:15:03Dammit, Bree.
00:15:05A few more sessions isn't gonna fix us.
00:15:07This is bigger than that.
00:15:09Why don't we do it this way?
00:15:12Rex, you can take the first half hour.
00:15:14Bree, you can take the second.
00:15:18Fine.
00:15:20Oh, and Doctor, if what he's about to discuss has anything to do with adultery,
00:15:24prostitution, or internet pornography,
00:15:26I would really appreciate you taking a moral hard line.
00:15:29Hi, Ashley.
00:15:46Remember me?
00:15:47We met earlier.
00:15:51Wow.
00:15:52Aren't you the little artist?
00:15:54What are those?
00:15:55Flamingos?
00:15:56No.
00:15:59Well, they're very pretty.
00:16:01It almost looks like they're kissing.
00:16:04Funny thing about kissing.
00:16:06It's not just for husbands and wives.
00:16:09Sometimes we kiss our mom or our grandpa.
00:16:12Sometimes we even kiss our dog.
00:16:14Sometimes we even kiss people who are just our friends.
00:16:17Kind of like a high five on the lips, right?
00:16:25Hey, Ash.
00:16:27I was at the mall and I saw this.
00:16:29I thought you might like it.
00:16:31She's Hawaiian.
00:16:33Her name is Princess Kahalua.
00:16:34And I think it means little waterfall or big pond or something.
00:16:43Okay.
00:16:44So we're good, right?
00:16:48Okay.
00:16:49Well, you enjoy your new little friend.
00:16:51And if there's anything else you need, you just let me know.
00:16:56What I'd really like is a bike.
00:17:04Where did you find that?
00:17:28She used this to kill herself.
00:17:31Why would you keep it?
00:17:34Why?
00:17:36Because I thought we might need it someday.
00:17:38For what?
00:17:40Protection.
00:17:41I want to talk about mom.
00:17:42You need to take your medication.
00:17:43We are going to talk about mom.
00:17:55Hello, Zach.
00:17:57I hope this isn't a bad time.
00:17:59What can I do for you, Mrs. Vandicamp?
00:18:02Well, I wanted to invite you and your father to a dinner party tomorrow night.
00:18:07I'm not sure where he is right now.
00:18:09Oh.
00:18:10Well, I'm sorry at such late notice, but, well, we weren't sure that you and your father were ready for any kind of social engagement yet.
00:18:16But, well, we're sort of throwing it in your mother's honor.
00:18:22Really?
00:18:24Yes, it's just going to be a casual night with the gang.
00:18:26We're going to eat and tell fun stories about your mom.
00:18:29Zach?
00:18:30Are you okay?
00:18:31Hello, Ray.
00:18:32Oh, hi, Paul.
00:18:33I was just...
00:18:34I heard.
00:18:35Thank you, but we already have plans for a model.
00:18:36Oh.
00:18:37That's too bad.
00:18:38Well, I should go.
00:18:39Thank you, Mrs. Vandicamp.
00:18:41For what, Zach?
00:18:42Remembering my mom.
00:18:44Hmph.
00:18:45That night, Paul gave his son something to calm his nerves.
00:18:49And the next day, Gabrielle calmed her own nerves.
00:18:52Okay, what?
00:18:53I'm sorry.
00:18:54I'm sorry.
00:18:55I'm sorry.
00:18:56No, we didn't have any sense.
00:18:57Well, we didn't have any sense.
00:18:58I don't have any sense.
00:18:59I don't want to be a happy guy.
00:19:00I don't want to be a happy guy.
00:19:01What?
00:19:02What?
00:19:03Well, let's go.
00:19:04Well, I should go.
00:19:06Mrs. Vandicamp.
00:19:07For what, Zach?
00:19:08Remembering my mom.
00:19:09Hmm.
00:19:10That night, Paul gave his son something to calm his nerves.
00:19:12Gabrielle calmed her own nerves by giving something to her new best friend.
00:19:17Here you go.
00:19:18Top of the line, three-speed aluminum frame, handlebar ribbons, and a bell.
00:19:23And you'll notice it's royal blue to match your pretty little eyes.
00:19:26My eyes are green.
00:19:28Yeah, well, you'll be cruising so fast on this, no one will even notice.
00:19:32It's all yours, hon.
00:19:33Have fun.
00:19:39What? What's wrong?
00:19:40I don't know how to ride a bike.
00:19:43What?
00:19:44Well, then why did you ask for one?
00:19:47Why can't you show me?
00:19:50Sure, one of these days.
00:19:53What's wrong with now?
00:20:02After her talk with Lynette, Susan decided to take a look at her old photo album.
00:20:06And she began to see herself in a whole new light.
00:20:11And the picture wasn't flattering.
00:20:13Yeah, you got Carl.
00:20:25Leave a message.
00:20:28Hey, Carl, it's me.
00:20:29I was hoping you'd be there.
00:20:31Um, listen, we need to talk.
00:20:33So, maybe when you drop Julie off tomorrow, we could have a moment.
00:20:37It's important to give my best to Randy.
00:20:46Call me.
00:20:50Susan was proud of herself.
00:20:52She was finally ready to let go of her anger.
00:20:54Well, almost.
00:21:06The boys will be hungry at 5.30, sir.
00:21:08Put the fish sticks in the toaster oven at 5 o'clock.
00:21:11For a half an hour, honey.
00:21:12I know it.
00:21:13It's the third time you've told me.
00:21:14Well, the food's like God help you.
00:21:16Beautiful.
00:21:16I don't need a pamphlet.
00:21:18It's not brain surgery.
00:21:19They're just kids, for God's sake.
00:21:21Preston, would you come here?
00:21:26Yeah.
00:21:27Sweet.
00:21:28You know our rule about eating cookies, right?
00:21:30Yeah, we can't have them after 5 because sugar makes us hyper.
00:21:33Yeah.
00:21:34But tonight, anything goes.
00:21:38Make sure you share with your brothers.
00:21:40Thanks, Mom.
00:21:45Don't look at your feet.
00:21:47Don't look at your feet.
00:21:47Look at the robes.
00:21:48Look at the robes.
00:21:49Good.
00:21:50Ow.
00:21:50Okay.
00:21:51Find your balance.
00:21:52Find your balance.
00:21:53Hey, it's all you.
00:21:54It's all you.
00:21:55You're doing great.
00:21:57Okay, stay to the right.
00:21:58Watch the car.
00:21:59Watch the car.
00:22:00Watch the car.
00:22:02Oh, God.
00:22:05Are you okay?
00:22:07Yeah.
00:22:07Let's go again.
00:22:08Oh, honey.
00:22:09These heels don't have another block in them.
00:22:11What about tomorrow?
00:22:13Well, you won't be around tomorrow because you have school.
00:22:16I'm homeschooled.
00:22:17I'm always around.
00:22:19It was in that moment
00:22:20that Gabrielle realized
00:22:22that Gabrielle realized
00:22:22this ride was far from over.
00:22:27I'm coming.
00:22:33Carl, what are you doing here?
00:22:34I asked you to come tomorrow.
00:22:35You said you wanted to talk.
00:22:36It sounded important.
00:22:37Tomorrow?
00:22:38I'm in a towel.
00:22:39Well, we were married 14 years.
00:22:41I know what's under there.
00:22:42Come on.
00:22:47I'm not really ready for this.
00:22:48I was going to have a whole speech prepared.
00:22:50Brady and I have plans tomorrow.
00:22:52Well, I suggest you wing it.
00:22:56Oh.
00:22:58Um.
00:22:59Okay.
00:23:01Here's the thing, Carl.
00:23:02I was thinking about what happened in the driveway yesterday.
00:23:06And I just don't want to...
00:23:09I don't want to live like that.
00:23:11I don't want to be that kind of person.
00:23:13And I just thought if the two of us, you know, if we had a nice calm...
00:23:18I need an apology, Carl.
00:23:21A what?
00:23:21An apology for the way you ended our marriage.
00:23:23You never took any responsibility for your behavior.
00:23:25I don't know what to say, Susan.
00:23:30The heart wants what it wants.
00:23:32What does that mean?
00:23:33I fell in love.
00:23:36While you were married to someone else.
00:23:38The heart wants what it wants.
00:23:41Yeah, well, my heart wants to hurt you, but I can control myself.
00:23:45I don't want to go back to that ugly place, really.
00:23:48And if you do, I suggest you get some help.
00:23:52You know what?
00:23:53I don't need an apology.
00:23:55I don't need anything from you.
00:23:56You're humiliating yourself.
00:23:58No, you're the one who's been humiliated, Carl.
00:24:00Why don't you see that?
00:24:01You walked out on your family.
00:24:03People think you're scum, not me.
00:24:06So worry about yourself.
00:24:07I'm okay with me.
00:24:09I can walk down the street and hold my head high.
00:24:12I can walk down the street.
00:24:25As the sun slowly settled on Wisteria Lane, an unsettled Susan racked her brain to find
00:24:47a way into her own house.
00:24:49I can walk down the street and find a way into her own house.
00:25:21Lying naked in her shrubs, it occurred to Susan this could be the most humiliating moment of her life.
00:25:33Susan?
00:25:34She was wrong.
00:25:36What you doing?
00:25:38Lock myself out.
00:25:41Naked.
00:25:42Oh.
00:25:43And then I fell.
00:25:45So how are you?
00:25:46Good, good.
00:25:47I just got back.
00:25:48I've been gone all day and I got your messages about dinner.
00:25:50And, um, I would love to come if the invite still stands.
00:25:54It's a date.
00:25:55All right, I, um, assume the dress is casual.
00:26:00Yeah.
00:26:01It's casual.
00:26:02Thanks for helping me break in.
00:26:12Do you think it'll be hard to replace that screen?
00:26:15Well, it depends.
00:26:16Nail it in yourself.
00:26:17You might want to wear gloves.
00:26:19Or pants.
00:26:21Pants.
00:26:21But it hurt.
00:26:22Okay.
00:26:22I know what just happened is funny, in theory.
00:26:26But I'm nowhere near ready to laugh about it, so please, no jokes.
00:26:31Hey, where have you two been?
00:26:33Uh, Susan had a problem finding something to wear.
00:26:37Oh, is that the kind of thing you meant?
00:26:38Pretty much.
00:26:39The kids are bouncing off the walls, huh?
00:26:42Well, I'm sure you can figure a way to put them to bed, Tom.
00:26:44I mean, for God's sakes, Tom, they're just kids.
00:26:50Hey, are you okay?
00:26:52Yes, I, uh, went jogging today, and I think I just pushed myself too hard.
00:26:57Oh, you're probably not wearing the right shoes.
00:26:59Yeah, that thought did cross my mind.
00:27:03So, Gabrielle says that you and Bri are taking lessons three times a week.
00:27:06Uh-huh.
00:27:06I'm actually thinking about playing again.
00:27:07I mean, it's such great exercise.
00:27:08Mm, that it is.
00:27:10And my drop shot could use a serious tune-up.
00:27:12Think you can give me the number you're pro?
00:27:13Yeah, I'll, uh, I'll give it to you later.
00:27:17Well, what club does he work on?
00:27:20Um, we're not really taking tennis lessons, Carlos.
00:27:25You're not?
00:27:27That's a story Bri concocted to cover the fact that we're seeing a marriage counselor.
00:27:33Bri, Bri.
00:27:36He wouldn't stop asking about the tennis pro.
00:27:42Bri and I are in marriage counseling.
00:27:43Bri and I are in marriage counseling.
00:27:46Everyone knows our secret now.
00:27:48Did the sky fall?
00:27:49Has your life come crashing down?
00:27:57If everybody would please take your seats.
00:27:59Dinner is served.
00:28:00Bri and I are in marriage counseling.
00:28:17It's currently 55 degrees.
00:28:19Now we go to Rizley.
00:28:20My life.
00:28:22Anyway.
00:28:23Rizley discovery was made today in Westbrook when a cat was found in Rockwater Lake.
00:28:28Discovered by a local area businessman and his grandson while they were fishing.
00:28:32Investigators recovered a wooden chest containing what appears to be human remains.
00:28:37Now, a police spokesman says the body was...
00:28:40And here we go.
00:28:42And now it's for us.
00:28:43Let's go.
00:28:44Let's wash oură.
00:28:45OuráșŻters today are mentioned air.
00:28:46ÙTERU average of 30 seconds would be upset because of our
00:29:10okay i gotta break the ice here so you're in counseling big deal you want humiliation i'll
00:29:22give you humiliation i locked myself out of my house stark naked and got caught by my mind oh
00:29:28my god when did this happen today right before the party what can i say right place right time
00:29:33i think i can top that try getting thrown out of disneyland for lewd behavior what when was this
00:29:39when tom and i were first married things got a little out of hand on mr toad's wild ride you're
00:29:44kidding no we got perp walked down main street usa as we're doing true confessions carlos and i once
00:29:51broke a waterbed in cancun how'd you manage that oh he used to have a thing for spiked heels i'd just
00:29:56like to make it clear she was wearing them rex cries after he ejaculates
00:30:09you think we left too early i was thinking we left too late
00:30:35so is uh rex gone for good i don't know god i hope not i mean they've always been wound a little
00:30:45tight but i've never seen them like that then again who am i to judge you mean people who live
00:30:51in glass houses shouldn't throw soda cans okay you have got to know that i only get that angry around
00:30:56carl he just treated me so badly at the end i haven't been able to get past it maybe you did
00:31:02you a big favor what do you mean let's look at carl as a starter marriage you know boot camp
00:31:07preparing you for something better next time
00:31:09listen mike about the whole seeing me naked thing i i just want to thank you for being such a
00:31:20perfect gentleman oh i wasn't a perfect gentleman i might have stuck a peek
00:31:25oh good night and um for what it's worth wow
00:31:32hey how was your night
00:31:50hey we are raising little terrorists you know that don't you oh didn't have a good time
00:31:57okay you know it dropped the act i know you gave him cookies oh who cracked anyway
00:32:03porter oh yeah so how was your uh dinner party well there was dinner but it wasn't much of a party
00:32:11uh-oh what happened i don't know rex announced that he and brie are in counseling she retaliated
00:32:19with this whole revelation which i won't even go into now and the bottom line is he stormed out
00:32:23clearly there's trouble in paradise honestly i'm not that surprised why not i don't know i just never
00:32:30got the idea that they were really happy
00:32:42are we happy
00:32:49man oh man i keep seeing that look on rex's face and then him taking off like that
00:32:53some night then again i would probably cry too if i had to have sex with that woman
00:33:02i mean you watch a man get torn down like that it makes you wonder why you'd let her get away with it
00:33:06believe me if a woman ever humiliated me like that in public it would only happen once
00:33:13so uh where are you going i'll be staying at the motor lodge a hotel by the interstate has better
00:33:26rates and uh it's closer to your work fine i'm packing your swimsuit there's a pool there and i know how
00:33:35swimming relaxes you when our kids ask where i am what are you gonna say um i could tell them that you
00:33:42went to tennis camp that was a joke yeah i got it
00:33:52there obviously if you've forgotten anything you can um come right back and get it well i'll call you
00:34:02rex
00:34:04in college when we first started dating people were so jealous of us
00:34:09we were the golden couple everybody knew we were gonna have this wonderful life
00:34:13why is this happening
00:34:19because you can't even let me pack my own suitcase
00:34:29all right
00:34:43All right, kid.
00:34:48Have fun.
00:34:49Hey, where are you going?
00:34:51Just a sec.
00:34:52Mom, don't worry.
00:34:53I'm not packing heat.
00:34:54Hey, Brandy, could you scoot a little?
00:34:58Just scoot.
00:35:00Hi.
00:35:01What are you doing?
00:35:02I'll be quick.
00:35:03Brandy, I'm sorry for the way I treated you.
00:35:05It was uncalled for and childish, and it won't happen again.
00:35:08I have built up a lot of anger towards you, both of you.
00:35:12And I realize now that I just can't carry that around anymore.
00:35:14So, apology or no apology, I'm moving on.
00:35:25Mrs. Mayor?
00:35:27Brandy.
00:35:28Brandy, get in the car.
00:35:29Mrs. Mayor?
00:35:30Please, call me Susan.
00:35:34I just wanted you to know what happened between me and Carl.
00:35:38Things got out of hand because I thought your marriage was over.
00:35:42Anyway, I just wanted you to know I'm sorry.
00:35:44I really am.
00:35:53And though it came from an unexpected source,
00:35:56Susan finally got the apology she'd always wanted.
00:36:04Hey.
00:36:05Let me take those.
00:36:12You're wearing a really big hat.
00:36:13Yes, I am.
00:36:15Listen, the kids are watching a video,
00:36:18which means that we've got only about 45 minutes
00:36:20until they actually find Nemo.
00:36:22So I suggest that we make the most of it.
00:36:26By reliving your night out with the guys?
00:36:30Lynette?
00:36:30I'm trying.
00:36:40You look ridiculous in that thing.
00:36:44Sexy ridiculous?
00:36:47Maybe.
00:36:49I can live.
00:36:52Maybe.
00:36:52You know,
00:37:03it's going to take more than just this one night.
00:37:07I know.
00:37:07Hmm.
00:37:13Looks like we have an audience.
00:37:16Let him look.
00:37:21As long as they don't try and cut him.
00:37:33Dr. Goldfein.
00:37:34Bree,
00:37:34we're not scheduled now, are we?
00:37:37I didn't have time to make an appointment.
00:37:39Rex moved out today.
00:37:41I'm very sorry to hear that,
00:37:43but unfortunately,
00:37:44I'm completely booked right now.
00:37:45I don't need much time.
00:37:46It just seems that you have more insight
00:37:47into my situation than I do,
00:37:49and I just think that...
00:37:50Bree, we can't talk now.
00:37:51If you could just tell me what he told you,
00:37:53then I could fix the problem.
00:37:54I can't do that.
00:37:55It's completely unethical.
00:37:57Well, why can't you...
00:37:58That's my next appointment.
00:38:00You really need to go.
00:38:01Dr. Goldfein, please.
00:38:04Hold on.
00:38:05I'll go and talk to my client.
00:38:07Okay.
00:38:07Brie searched for Rex's audio tape,
00:38:33hoping to find answers.
00:38:34She found answers, all right,
00:38:38but to entirely different questions.
00:38:50Brie, I'm sorry.
00:38:52He can't wait,
00:38:53but I can see you first thing in the morning,
00:38:55eight o'clock.
00:38:56Eight o'clock.
00:38:59Sorry to interrupt.
00:39:00Bye.
00:39:01Bye.
00:39:04Yes, I remember the world.
00:39:12Every detail.
00:39:14And what I remember most
00:39:16is how afraid I was.
00:39:18What a waste.
00:39:20You see, to live in fear
00:39:22is not to live at all.
00:39:25I wish I could tell this
00:39:27to those I left behind,
00:39:28but would it do any good?
00:39:30Probably not.
00:39:35I understand now.
00:39:37There will always be those
00:39:38who face their fears.
00:39:42And there will always be those
00:39:44who run away.
00:39:47Anybody home?
00:39:57Previously on Desperate Housewives,
00:40:00Susan played with fire.
00:40:01That's not my cup.
00:40:03And could get burned.
00:40:04Go to a spa, go shopping,
00:40:05and find a way to relax.
00:40:07Gabrielle...
00:40:07Go get here as fast as you can.
00:40:09...found herself a playmate.
00:40:11Lynette couldn't get her kids
00:40:12to stop playing.
00:40:13Ma'am, you know why I pulled you over?
00:40:14I have a theory.
00:40:16I'm going to start getting
00:40:17some sleep pretty soon.
00:40:18I'll be forced to move back upstairs
00:40:19out of sheer exhaustion.
00:40:20And Brie played hardball.
00:40:23Everyone has a little dirty laundry.
00:40:28When I was alive,
00:40:30I maintained many different identities.
00:40:33Lover, wife,
00:40:35and ultimately victim.
00:40:37Yes, labels are important
00:40:39to the living.
00:40:40They dictate how people
00:40:41see themselves.
00:40:42Like my friend, Lynette.
00:40:44She used to see herself
00:40:45as a career woman
00:40:46and a hugely successful
00:40:47one at that.
00:40:50She was known
00:40:51for her power lunches,
00:40:53her eye-catching presentations,
00:40:55and her ruthlessness
00:40:56in wiping out the competition.
00:41:00But Lynette gave up her career
00:41:01to assume a new label,
00:41:03an incredibly satisfying role
00:41:05of full-time mother.
00:41:10Skava residence?
00:41:12Yes, this is me.
00:41:13But unfortunately for Lynette,
00:41:19this new label
00:41:20frequently fell short
00:41:21of what was advertised.
00:41:27How in the world
00:41:28did they...
00:41:29I left the door
00:41:31to the art supply cupboard
00:41:32open for five minutes.
00:41:33That's all.
00:41:34Five minutes?
00:41:36The little girl,
00:41:38why didn't she say anything?
00:41:39Your boys work quickly.
00:41:42Well, obviously,
00:41:43they will be punished
00:41:44for this severely.
00:41:46I hesitate bringing this up
00:41:48since you got so ugly
00:41:49about it last time.
00:41:50They don't have
00:41:51attention deficit disorder,
00:41:52and I'm not going
00:41:53to drug my boys
00:41:54just to make your job easier.
00:41:57I'd rather change teachers.
00:41:58The boys are in my class
00:42:00because I'm the only teacher
00:42:01who can handle them.
00:42:02What if we separate the twins?
00:42:05Put them in different classes.
00:42:08They're much calmer
00:42:09when they're not bouncing
00:42:10off one another.
00:42:11We can try that.
00:42:13But if it doesn't work,
00:42:14we may no longer
00:42:15be able to accommodate them.
00:42:18It suddenly occurred to Lynette.
00:42:20Her label was about
00:42:22to change yet again.
00:42:23And for the next few years,
00:42:25she would be known as
00:42:27the mother of the boys
00:42:28who painted Tiffany Axelrod
00:42:30blue.
00:42:31Wow.
00:42:31Wow.
00:42:32Wow.
00:43:02It looked to be
00:43:20an interesting afternoon
00:43:21on Wisteria Lane.
00:43:23A mysterious cassette tape
00:43:25had been discovered
00:43:25by my friend Bree.
00:43:27She had stolen it
00:43:28from her marriage counselor,
00:43:30a counselor I'd once spoken to
00:43:31in strictest confidence.
00:43:35So how have you been?
00:43:36I had the nightmare again.
00:43:37It's weird to hear Mary Alice.
00:43:40Still the same one?
00:43:41Yes.
00:43:42But this time,
00:43:43I was standing in a river
00:43:44and I saw the girl
00:43:46under the water
00:43:47and she kept screaming
00:43:48Angela over and over again.
00:43:51So what do you think
00:43:51the significance
00:43:52of the name Angela is?
00:43:55Actually,
00:43:56that's my real name.
00:43:58Her real name?
00:43:59That doesn't make any sense.
00:44:02I've seen her driver's license.
00:44:03It did not say Angela.
00:44:05Bree,
00:44:05what does it say
00:44:05on the rest of the tape?
00:44:06Just more about her nightmares
00:44:08and this girl
00:44:09she was afraid of.
00:44:10So what the hell
00:44:11do we do now?
00:44:11I think we should show Paul
00:44:25the note.
00:44:26Are you sure?
00:44:27He's going to freak.
00:44:28Well, it's now or never.
00:44:29I mean,
00:44:29I saw what he's asking
00:44:30for the place.
00:44:31It's going to sell quickly.
00:44:34Can I say something?
00:44:36I'm glad Paul's moving.
00:44:38Gabby!
00:44:38I'm sorry.
00:44:40He's just always
00:44:41giving me the creeps.
00:44:42Haven't you guys noticed
00:44:43he has this dark thing
00:44:44going on?
00:44:46There's something about him
00:44:47that just feels
00:44:47malignant?
00:44:49Yes.
00:44:50We've all sort of felt it.
00:44:57That being said,
00:44:58I do love what he's done
00:44:59with that lawn.
00:45:00Mom, the dish is clean.
00:45:16Huh?
00:45:17Oh.
00:45:18I still don't understand
00:45:19why you don't just ask him
00:45:20out on an official date date.
00:45:22Oh, I'm trying a new strategy
00:45:23I'm playing hard to get.
00:45:25How long do you think
00:45:25you can keep that up?
00:45:26Oh, maybe until noon.
00:45:28Then I'm going to have to
00:45:29run over there
00:45:29and beg you on to love me.
00:45:33Mom,
00:45:33I don't think you're
00:45:35going to be able
00:45:35to wait that long.
00:45:39You've got to be kidding.
00:45:41She washed her car yesterday.
00:45:42Oh, no, she's not.
00:45:57Yep.
00:45:59She's bringing out
00:46:00the big guns.
00:46:00You better get over there.
00:46:12She's wearing cotton.
00:46:15What am I supposed
00:46:16to say to Mike?
00:46:17I saw you half naked
00:46:18and I thought I'd drop by?
00:46:19What's that?
00:46:20A piece of Mike's junk,
00:46:21man, we got by mistake.
00:46:22I held on to it
00:46:23in case of an emergency.
00:46:26God bless you.
00:46:27Hey, Susan.
00:46:42We, um, got this by mistake.
00:46:45Oh, thanks.
00:46:48I hope it's not important.
00:46:50Oh, no, it's just a promotion
00:46:51for the Rialto.
00:46:52They're having a film festival.
00:46:53Oh, well, I guess I've done
00:46:58my good deed for the day.
00:47:01I'll just head back home.
00:47:05Bye.
00:47:08Hey, you like old movies?
00:47:09I love old movies.
00:47:14I hate Susan Mayer.
00:47:20Every time I see those
00:47:22big doe eyes of hers,
00:47:24I swear to God,
00:47:25I just want to go out
00:47:26and shoot a deer.
00:47:28What has she done this time?
00:47:30She is out there
00:47:31throwing herself
00:47:32at Mike Delfino.
00:47:34Again.
00:47:35Susan likes Mike?
00:47:38Where the hell
00:47:38have you been, Martha?
00:47:40She's been lusting after him
00:47:42ever since you moved in.
00:47:43I got your message.
00:47:52What's going on?
00:47:53The boys refuse
00:47:54to be separated.
00:47:56They refuse?
00:47:58They're six years old.
00:47:59Make them.
00:48:00Well, school regulations
00:48:01are pretty strict
00:48:02about me wrestling
00:48:03with the boys.
00:48:04But if you want
00:48:05to give it a shot,
00:48:07be my guest.
00:48:08Fine.
00:48:09Which one goes
00:48:13and which one stays?
00:48:15You pick.
00:48:16I love taking baths.
00:48:44Especially with you.
00:48:46It's like taking a vacation
00:48:47from the world.
00:48:49I hated taking baths
00:48:50when I was a kid.
00:48:51Of course, back then,
00:48:53the only thing I had to play
00:48:54with was my rubber ducky.
00:48:57Who's that?
00:48:58It's Mr. Police.
00:49:01Relax.
00:49:01Carlos is at work.
00:49:03He doesn't ring
00:49:03the doorbell.
00:49:11It's the cable guy.
00:49:13It's three hours late.
00:49:14Use the side entrance.
00:49:17Gabrielle knew
00:49:18her vacation
00:49:19from the world
00:49:20had ended.
00:49:21What she didn't know
00:49:22was
00:49:22John had left behind
00:49:24a souvenir.
00:49:28I'm telling you,
00:49:29Dad didn't come home
00:49:30last night.
00:49:30They had a fight.
00:49:31A bad one.
00:49:32How bad?
00:49:33Like, divorce court bad.
00:49:39Listen to her.
00:49:41She always overcompensates
00:49:42when she's worried.
00:49:43Dad moves out
00:49:44and leaves this with her.
00:49:45I'll lose my mind.
00:49:49Dinner is on the table.
00:49:52Mom,
00:49:52where'd Dad go last night?
00:49:55He got a last-minute call
00:49:56to speak at a medical conference
00:49:57in Philadelphia.
00:49:59Take your seats.
00:49:59This marriage is so over.
00:50:15Andrew?
00:50:23Again, sorry I was late.
00:50:24The schedule overbooked me.
00:50:26How long are you going to be?
00:50:27Almost done.
00:50:27What is that scent?
00:50:30Is that siege and citrus?
00:50:31It's amazing.
00:50:32Try to hurry.
00:50:33I have stuff to do.
00:50:41Come on.
00:50:42What's happening?
00:50:59The cable guy fell.
00:51:00He hit his head on the tub.
00:51:01He may have a concussion.
00:51:03It's almost eight.
00:51:04He was late.
00:51:05I don't know.
00:51:05I don't know.
00:51:12Mrs. Hoover.
00:51:26Hello, Susan.
00:51:27I made you a pie.
00:51:29Oh, wow.
00:51:30Why?
00:51:31Do I need a motive
00:51:32to do something nice?
00:51:36I can't wait for you to try this.
00:51:38It's mincemeat.
00:51:39Actually, I just had dinner.
00:51:41That's okay.
00:51:42You can save it for later.
00:51:47What's so funny?
00:51:48I was just thinking of that expression,
00:51:50I'll make mincemeat out of you.
00:51:52Mincemeat used to be an entree
00:51:53made up of mostly chopped meat,
00:51:55so it was like saying,
00:51:56I'll chop you up into little bits.
00:51:59But that was centuries ago.
00:52:01Today, mincemeat is mostly made up of
00:52:04fruit, spices, and rum.
00:52:07There's no meat in it,
00:52:08and still people say,
00:52:09I'll make mincemeat out of you.
00:52:11I don't know that people
00:52:12really say that anymore.
00:52:13I do.
00:52:15So, Susan, how are you?
00:52:18I'm fine.
00:52:19Good.
00:52:21You know, I have a confession to make.
00:52:24I've always wished I'd have been
00:52:26more supportive when Carl left you.
00:52:28Oh, you don't have to apologize
00:52:29about Carl.
00:52:30Really, Carl and I are over.
00:52:32I've moved on.
00:52:32Yes, I know.
00:52:33You've moved on to that nice
00:52:35Mike Delfino.
00:52:36He's quite a catch, isn't he?
00:52:40You like him, don't you?
00:52:42Uh, sure.
00:52:43As a friend.
00:52:45Oh, Susan.
00:52:47Being coy is a strategy
00:52:48best employed by virgins
00:52:50at their first dance.
00:52:51For women of our age,
00:52:53it's just annoying.
00:52:56Are you sure you don't want pie?
00:52:58No, thank you.
00:53:00I hope it works out
00:53:01with you and Mike.
00:53:01You've been so desperate
00:53:03to land him.
00:53:04Why?
00:53:05Well, I am not desperate.
00:53:08Oh, good Lord, Susan.
00:53:09You burned your rival's house down.
00:53:11If that isn't desperate,
00:53:12I don't know what is.
00:53:15Mrs. Hoover,
00:53:16with all due respect,
00:53:17you're crazy.
00:53:25What's that?
00:53:26I think you recognize it.
00:53:27I found it in the ruins
00:53:29of Edie's home.
00:53:34Well, that's not...
00:53:35Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh.
00:53:36My point is this.
00:53:38I wasn't there for you
00:53:39when Carl left,
00:53:40but I'm here for you now.
00:53:41As far as I'm concerned,
00:53:42this is our secret.
00:53:44And no one ever need know.
00:53:47Oh, Susan.
00:53:49You don't know how good it feels
00:53:51to finally be able to help you.
00:53:54You look so pale.
00:53:57Now, I insist you try some of my pie.
00:54:03Go on.
00:54:09Did I mention it's mincemeat?
00:54:11Open the door, please.
00:54:23Hang on.
00:54:26What?
00:54:26May I come in?
00:54:27No.
00:54:28Well, I want to talk to you.
00:54:30And talk.
00:54:32Where were you last night?
00:54:35Brian's.
00:54:36I just spoke to Brian's mother.
00:54:38Now, tell me again
00:54:38where you were last night,
00:54:39and this time,
00:54:40don't lie to me.
00:54:42Where'd you say Dad was again?
00:54:44In Philadelphia?
00:54:46Andrew, don't change the subject.
00:54:48I'm sorry.
00:54:48I thought the subject
00:54:49was telling lies.
00:54:51I called Dad's cell phone.
00:54:52I know he moved out.
00:54:55Well, it's just temporary,
00:54:56and I thought it would upset you,
00:55:00so I was protecting you.
00:55:01Whatever.
00:55:02You lied, so
00:55:03start pretending like
00:55:04you have some sort of
00:55:05moral authority.
00:55:06Andrew, just because I chose
00:55:07not to share my marital problems
00:55:08with you does not give you
00:55:09the right to be rude.
00:55:10How about driving my father away?
00:55:12Do I get to be rude then?
00:55:13Do I get to be rude,
00:55:14do I get to be rude,
00:55:15hoe do I do it?
00:55:16Do I get to be rude?
00:55:16seinecht,
00:55:17Was hoping to be rude,
00:55:18æèŹ,
00:55:18omìŽìŠice.
00:55:19Are you around me to be rude?
00:55:19I knew not to be rude.
00:55:20Do I get to admit to.
00:55:21Do we have to be rude?
00:55:21Do I get to be rude?
00:55:22Yes.
00:55:23Do I ?
00:55:23Do I get to be rude?
00:55:24Do I get to be rude?
00:55:24Do I get to be rude?
00:55:25Do I get to be rude?
00:55:25Oh, my God.
00:55:55Hi.
00:55:59What's this?
00:56:00It's a sock.
00:56:01It's a man's sock.
00:56:02I found it under a bed.
00:56:03It's not mine.
00:56:05Oh, for God's sakes, Carlos, it's Yao Lin's.
00:56:08Our maid wears size 13 gym socks.
00:56:10No, she dusts with them.
00:56:18See?
00:56:19Socks instead of racks.
00:56:25Susan, hello.
00:56:41Mrs. Huber.
00:56:44Did you and Mike come together?
00:56:45I saw him over in the fresh produce aisle.
00:56:47No, like I told you before, we're just friends.
00:56:53By the way, if I didn't make it clear yesterday, I absolutely did not do that thing you accused me of.
00:57:00Hey, Susan.
00:57:01Hey, Miss Huber.
00:57:02Nice to see you, Mike.
00:57:04Hey.
00:57:05You like Alfred Hitchcock?
00:57:07They're doing a retrospective down at the Rialto.
00:57:12Uh, I'm not really a fan.
00:57:17Oh, come on.
00:57:17How can you not like Hitchcock?
00:57:19I just, uh, don't.
00:57:22Okay, have a nice night.
00:57:25Oh.
00:57:27Okay.
00:57:29Well, uh, nice to see you.
00:57:32You too, Miss Huber.
00:57:37You're so silly.
00:57:39Pretending not to like him on my account.
00:57:41I mean, really.
00:57:42Will you just drop it?
00:57:44You shouldn't be rude to me, Susan.
00:57:47Your secret is not an easy burden to bear.
00:57:49That insurance company is putting Edie through hell.
00:57:53But still, I've said nothing.
00:57:55Well...
00:57:55And the longer it takes for her to get payment, the longer she'll be staying with me.
00:58:00Eating me out of house and home.
00:58:02Using up my hot water.
00:58:05What exactly is it you want from me, Mrs. Huber?
00:58:15Uh, are these together?
00:58:19Bring it up.
00:58:37If the school and the pediatrician both think the twins could stand to be medicated, then what's the problem?
00:58:42I used to run a company with 85 people, and now I can't wrangle three small boys without doping them?
00:58:49Talk about feeling like a failure.
00:58:51Lynette, you are a great mother, but let's face it, your kids are...
00:58:55A challenge.
00:58:59That's the nicest way you could have said that.
00:59:01You know, the truth is, when they're not making me want to tear my hair out, they're actually really sweet.
00:59:05I'm afraid, if I change the bad stuff, I'm going to change the good stuff.
00:59:11That's a tough call.
00:59:12Like this mug.
00:59:14I love this mug.
00:59:15If I medicate them, are they still going to make me a mug like this?
00:59:19You know, it's leaking.
00:59:22Yeah, I know.
00:59:24We talked to Paul.
00:59:28We told him we need to show him something.
00:59:30He's on his way over.
00:59:35So, Paul, we noticed that you're selling the house.
00:59:38Yes.
00:59:39Too many painful memories.
00:59:41I'm sure you understand.
00:59:47Well, before you move, we thought there was something you should know.
00:59:50It seems there may be more to Mary Alice's death than you were aware of.
00:59:55Oh?
00:59:57Remember when you asked us to pack her things?
01:00:00Well, when we did, we found a note.
01:00:01And we think that you should have it.
01:00:05You can see from the postmark, Mary Alice probably got it the day she died.
01:00:09Paul, are you going to be okay?
01:00:35No.
01:00:36No.
01:00:39Have you always cleaned with socks?
01:01:03Yes.
01:01:06Was that a Japanese thing?
01:01:09I'm Chinese.
01:01:19I don't like lying.
01:01:20Yeah?
01:01:21Well, I don't like your irony.
01:01:22So, there.
01:01:22So, what are you doing here?
01:01:40Carlos found this under the bed.
01:01:42Oh, crap.
01:01:44It's okay.
01:01:45It was a close call that I managed to cover.
01:01:46I got you these.
01:01:48So, from now on, we can't let Carlos see you around the house wearing anything resembling
01:01:52a gym sock.
01:01:53You want me to mow your lawn in sandals?
01:01:55I'd lose a toe.
01:01:56Imagine what you would lose if Carlos finds out you're trimming more than the hedges.
01:01:59Why are your friends staring at me?
01:02:04Did you tell them about us?
01:02:07No.
01:02:08They're staring because they think you're hot.
01:02:10Oh.
01:02:12Okay.
01:02:19It's 9.30.
01:02:20What is your brother thinking?
01:02:22Want my advice?
01:02:24Call Dad.
01:02:24Go tell him to kick Andrew's ass.
01:02:26I am perfectly capable of handling this without your father.
01:02:29Sorry.
01:02:29Where's your cell phone?
01:02:33Call Andrew and find out where he is.
01:02:35Mom, he's going to know you're behind this.
01:02:37No, he won't.
01:02:37Just act normal.
01:02:42Hey, it's me.
01:02:44Uh, what's going on?
01:02:48He knows.
01:02:51Andrew, this is your mother.
01:02:52I am rapidly reaching the end of my patience with you.
01:02:56Where are you?
01:02:58Are you at a bar?
01:03:00Andrew.
01:03:02Andrew?
01:03:05Mom?
01:03:06He hung up on me.
01:03:09What are you going to do?
01:03:10What are you going to do?
01:03:29Oh, yeah.
01:03:41Oh, yeah.
01:03:41Oh, yeah.
01:03:42Oh, yeah.
01:03:43Oh, yeah.
01:03:44Oh, yeah.
01:03:44Oh, yeah.
01:03:45What's your name?
01:03:45Here's a little...
01:03:46Heath? Ian? Andrew?
01:04:01Mom, how did you even know I was here?
01:04:07You went in my room?
01:04:08You think that's bad? Tomorrow morning, I'm cleaning it.
01:04:12Oh, by the way, Heath, I didn't get a chance to tell you
01:04:14that was a lovely solo last week at church.
01:04:17Thank you. We're out of here.
01:04:21I hope it wasn't something I said.
01:04:25Well, Andrew? Shall we?
01:04:29You just humiliated me in front of my friends.
01:04:32I'm not going anywhere with you.
01:04:35Fine.
01:04:39What are you doing?
01:04:40I'm staying for the show. I'm dying to see what all the fuss is about.
01:04:44Uh, excuse me, waitress. I'll have a glass of your house chardonnay.
01:04:55I'm curious, Andrew. As you fantasize about this woman,
01:04:58do you ever stop and think how she came to be on this runway?
01:05:02That's someone's little girl.
01:05:03And that someone probably had a lot of dreams for her.
01:05:06Dreams that did not include a thong and a pole.
01:05:09It's not going to work, okay?
01:05:11I'm not budging.
01:05:12God only knows what she's had to deal with in her life.
01:05:15Abject poverty, drugs, domestic violence,
01:05:18maybe even molestation.
01:05:20Mom.
01:05:21And now she treats herself the way other men treat her,
01:05:23like an object, a piece of meat.
01:05:26That does it.
01:05:28Kid, get her out of here.
01:05:29She's killing it for the rest of us.
01:05:31We're not here. Leave a message.
01:05:41It's Mrs. Hoover, Susan. Are you there?
01:05:44I can see your lights are off.
01:05:46I hope you're not screening that so tacky.
01:05:48Listen, I need to talk to you.
01:05:51My water heater just burst,
01:05:52and it's going to cost me $600 to get a new one.
01:05:55And I can't afford that.
01:05:57I'm just beside myself.
01:05:59Call me as soon as you get in.
01:06:01Call me as soon as you get in.
01:06:06Julie.
01:06:07Julie, honey, wake up. We need to talk.
01:06:09Can't this wait until morning?
01:06:11I think I'm being blackmailed.
01:06:15And when I realized I couldn't put out the fire, I ran.
01:06:19I must have dropped the measuring cup in the process.
01:06:22Why do I even let you out of the house?
01:06:24Obviously, I can't let her get away with this.
01:06:26The only thing to do is go to the police and tell them what happened.
01:06:28You can't do that.
01:06:29Julie, I don't think they'll throw me in jail.
01:06:32I mean, it was an accident.
01:06:34Dad won't care if it was an accident.
01:06:37You know he'll just use this as an excuse to reopen custody.
01:06:41Mom, I don't want to live with Dad.
01:06:44I know.
01:06:45I need to talk to you.
01:07:03Cool, sure.
01:07:07You were working Tuesday, right?
01:07:09Yeah.
01:07:09You remember the cable guy showing up?
01:07:14And you usually work till what time? Five?
01:07:17Yeah.
01:07:19Damn it.
01:07:20It means he was in the house for four hours.
01:07:23Wait.
01:07:24Um, you know, now that I think about it, I might not have seen him.
01:07:29Well, either you saw him or you didn't. Which is it?
01:07:32I didn't.
01:07:32John?
01:07:39Did my wife ask you to lie for her?
01:07:42Mr. Solis, I...
01:07:44I really don't want to get in the middle of anything.
01:07:51That's all I needed to know.
01:08:02Okay, let's run through it one more time.
01:08:04Mom, it's not brain surgery.
01:08:06You'll stay on guard while I crawl through Mrs. Hooper's doggy door.
01:08:09Once inside, I'll find the measuring cup.
01:08:10Simple.
01:08:11Oh, God.
01:08:12I hate that I'm trying to you into a little thief.
01:08:15It's our measuring cup.
01:08:16We're just taking back what's ours.
01:08:18Hey, that's right.
01:08:19But, ethically, we have nothing to be ashamed about.
01:08:23Oh, wear these.
01:08:25I don't want you to leave fingerprints.
01:08:32There she goes.
01:08:35Okay, move.
01:08:37Oh, so glad to be playing frisbee again.
01:08:39Here you go.
01:08:40Coming at you.
01:08:42All right, back up a little more.
01:08:44There you go.
01:08:45Woo!
01:08:46All right, here we go.
01:08:47Oh, my.
01:08:50Whoops.
01:08:52You better go get that.
01:08:53Yeah.
01:09:03Mike.
01:09:04Hey, Susan, I thought that was you.
01:09:05Uh, yeah.
01:09:07Julie and I are just out tossing the frisbee around, and it flew off him to Mrs. Hooper's
01:09:11backyard.
01:09:12Oh, you need some help?
01:09:13No, no, no, no.
01:09:14Uh, Julie's got it.
01:09:16Okay.
01:09:17Actually, I'm glad I ran into you.
01:09:18I just wanted to make sure that things were okay between us.
01:09:20The other day, you seemed kind of distant.
01:09:22Distant?
01:09:22What do you mean?
01:09:24I mean, you're not mad at me for some reason, are you?
01:09:27Uh, no, no, no, not at all.
01:09:31Good.
01:09:33I'm going to take one more shot at this.
01:09:34I got tickets for a Billy Wilder retrospective Wednesday night.
01:09:37I'd love to take you with me.
01:09:40You are so sweet.
01:09:42I would love to go.
01:09:43All right.
01:09:44Edie, I thought you'd be at work.
01:09:53I'm not feeling well.
01:09:55I got a sunburn the other day washing my car.
01:09:58Well, don't just run off.
01:10:00Come, come and hang out with us.
01:10:02Boy, you are one sick ticket.
01:10:04What?
01:10:05It's not bad enough that I have to watch you throw yourself at him every day, and now you
01:10:09want to make sure that I see it up close and personal?
01:10:12No, it's not like that.
01:10:13Hey, I'm going to take off, but I'll call you about Wednesday night, okay?
01:10:18Edie, wait!
01:10:19Uh, Mike and I were going to go see the movies on Wednesday, and I just thought it would be
01:10:26fun if you joined us.
01:10:28You want me to come with you?
01:10:30Yeah.
01:10:31Yeah, that's okay, isn't it, Mike?
01:10:34Well, it's a limited engagement, and it's sold out.
01:10:36I've only got two tickets.
01:10:39But, Edie, wait!
01:10:41Um, you should take my ticket.
01:10:43Really?
01:10:48Is that okay with you, Mike?
01:10:51Uh, yeah, sure.
01:10:55So, um, what time are you going to pick me up?
01:10:58Well, um...
01:11:03Hang on.
01:11:07You think you can have sex with anyone you want?
01:11:29Carlos couldn't help but feel proud of himself.
01:11:36After all, he'd just defended his honor.
01:11:39Or had he?
01:11:40Are you gay?
01:11:56Yes.
01:11:58Is that why you're doing this?
01:11:59Uh, yeah.
01:12:01Uh, yeah.
01:12:10He didn't call everyone and be like, can you buy some chocolates?
01:12:12Ladies.
01:12:13Sorry.
01:12:13Hey, Paul.
01:12:16What's up?
01:12:17I wanted to apologize for my outburst yesterday.
01:12:20Don't worry about it.
01:12:21We unloaded a lot on you.
01:12:22I suppose you're wondering why I reacted so violently to that note.
01:12:25Uh, it did cross our minds.
01:12:28Well, the truth is,
01:12:30Mary Alice was not a well person.
01:12:32She was very troubled.
01:12:35Troubled?
01:12:36At first, it was harmless.
01:12:38She would leave herself notes.
01:12:39Reminders like, pick up the milk or...
01:12:42Zach has a dentist appointment.
01:12:43But over time, the notes became ugly.
01:12:46Hateful messages started showing up.
01:12:48Mary Alice was writing them to me, to Zach, to herself.
01:12:51Really?
01:12:54That's why I lost it.
01:12:55I was reminded of what Zach and I had been through.
01:12:59Paul, I'm so sorry.
01:13:01We had no idea.
01:13:04Well, anyway, I'd appreciate it if you kept this to yourselves.
01:13:08Yeah.
01:13:09For Zach's sake.
01:13:10Of course.
01:13:11Of course.
01:13:14Bye.
01:13:17Wow.
01:13:19Yeah.
01:13:20I think he's lying.
01:13:22So do I.
01:13:31I think he's lying.
01:13:32I think he's lying.
01:13:32I think he's lying.
01:13:33I think he's lying.
01:13:34I think he's lying.
01:13:35I think he's lying.
01:13:36I think he's lying.
01:13:37I think he's lying.
01:13:38I think he's lying.
01:13:39I think he's lying.
01:13:40I think he's lying.
01:13:41I think he's lying.
01:13:42I think he's lying.
01:13:43I think he's lying.
01:13:44I think he's lying.
01:13:45I think he's lying.
01:13:46I think he's lying.
01:13:47I think he's lying.
01:13:48I think he's lying.
01:13:49I think he's lying.
01:13:50I think he's lying.
01:13:51I think he's lying.
01:13:52Boys, did you get in here, please?
01:13:59They broke my plate.
01:14:01Did not.
01:14:01We'll talk about that later.
01:14:02Right now, I need you to take some medicine.
01:14:04Are we sick?
01:14:05Not exactly.
01:14:06This is a special kind of medicine.
01:14:08It's like a vitamin, and you'll take it every day, okay?
01:14:12Oops.
01:14:15Stay right there.
01:14:22Now, open up.
01:14:29Guys, this is what you've got here.
01:14:36In that moment, Lynette made a decision.
01:14:43When it came to dealing with her children, medication was no longer an option.
01:14:49Of course, given her continuing level of frustration, Lynette also felt a little self-medication
01:14:57couldn't hurt.
01:15:06So what's your strategy?
01:15:09Are you just never going to speak to me again?
01:15:12Something like that.
01:15:13I suppose I do owe you an apology.
01:15:20Careful.
01:15:21I don't want you to strain yourself.
01:15:23I shouldn't have lied to you about your father.
01:15:25You and your sister are old enough to handle the truth, and I'm sorry.
01:15:28Keep going.
01:15:30I'm mad at you for about 7,000 other things.
01:15:33If you think I'm going to apologize for taking you out of a strip club, you're wrong.
01:15:37I consider it one of my finest moments.
01:15:38Oh, Andrew.
01:15:46I know you blame me for what's happening with your father, but it's not entirely my fault,
01:15:52and I need you to understand that.
01:15:56I do.
01:15:59I just don't want him to leave.
01:16:01I don't want him to leave.
01:16:02I don't want him to leave.
01:16:08Neither do I.
01:16:11Mom?
01:16:13Yeah.
01:16:15When can I have my door back?
01:16:20Three months.
01:16:21Aw.
01:16:22Royal Oaks was the scene of a hate crime today when Jonathan Liscoe, local gay activist
01:16:27and part-time female impersonator, was brutally attacked in his home.
01:16:31Liscoe speculated the attack was in response to his efforts to secure same-sex partner insurance
01:16:37coverage from his employer, Cliffside Cable.
01:16:40Police are circulating this sketch of the assailant.
01:16:42I have to say, you know, the circumstances speak for themselves, I've taken a strong stand
01:16:46with my company.
01:16:48Is there something you want to ask me?
01:16:52No.
01:16:52No.
01:17:05You took it, didn't you?
01:17:09Good evening, Mrs. Hooper.
01:17:11It's my own fault for not hiding the cup.
01:17:13Obviously, if you're capable of arson, I should have known you'd be capable of breaking
01:17:16and entering.
01:17:18I don't know what you're talking about, Mrs. Hooper.
01:17:20I suppose you destroyed it.
01:17:23Again, I don't know what you're talking about, but, yeah, I did.
01:17:30I was going to keep your secret.
01:17:31It's a shame you couldn't trust me.
01:17:35You're a piece of work.
01:17:36You know that?
01:17:38Oh, Susan, let's not be unpleasant.
01:17:41We can go back to the same friendly relationship we've always had.
01:17:44I will keep my lawn looking nice, and I will make sure that my music isn't played too loud,
01:17:52and if I get some of your mail, heck, I'll run it right over, because that's what good
01:17:56neighbors do.
01:17:56But from now on, when I run into you on the street, and I say good morning, Mrs. Hooper, or how are you, Mrs. Hooper, just know that inside, I am quietly, but decidedly, hating your guts.
01:18:12Be careful, dear.
01:18:17Let's not say things we'll live to regret.
01:18:22Good evening, Mrs. Hooper.
01:18:24He actually said Mary Alice was crazy?
01:18:36Not in so many words, but everything Paul said certainly made it seem like she was schizophrenic.
01:18:41I think he's hiding something.
01:18:42I know it.
01:18:43But wait, what about the tape?
01:18:45I mean, she did say that her name was Angela.
01:18:48Mary Alice was not crazy.
01:18:50Well, my father was a prosecutor, and he always said that the simplest explanation was usually the right one.
01:18:54But remember what the note said?
01:18:56I know what you did.
01:18:57It makes me sick, and I'm going to tell.
01:18:59That's not the kind of thing someone writes to themselves.
01:19:02That's a message sent by an enemy.
01:19:12So, exactly what is it you hired me to do?
01:19:16It's very simple, really.
01:19:17Someone sent that note to my wife, and I need to know who.
01:19:25What type of person would send such a note?
01:19:29Was it an enemy?
01:19:31Of course.
01:19:32But what kind?
01:19:34An acquaintance?
01:19:36A stranger?
01:19:38Or how about a neighbor that lives a few feet away?
01:19:43Is it a neighbor or anything?
01:20:09Of course.
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