OVAReact Podcast S05 E07 - What Women Want With Janet Mbugua - video Dailymotion

Capital FM Kenya

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00:00welcome to the overreact podcast we are live at what women wants 3.0 right here trademark

00:09and we are enjoying conversation with amazing women and tonight or now we have the amazing

00:16janet the change maker the woman who showed us how it's done we are so privileged to have you

00:23really thank you thank you more thank you angie i think you guys do incredible work so i'm happy

00:27to be here thank you yes so i mean for me i will say for us we view you as a living legend you're

00:35someone that has been the voice on the airwaves on the tv um you know so many kenyans are familiar

00:41with janet the brand janet book with the brand um but there are many other things that you do

00:47and you're also here uh you're moderating one of the key opening sessions today so tell us who is

00:53janet and also how you're participating in this year's what women want summit nice thank you guys

00:58first of all i i'm also seeing like legends in the making because i feel like you guys are the current

01:04sort of like crop of people who are leading in your industry so thank you thank you oh janet somebody

01:10asked me that earlier and i was like you know it's easier for me to say media personality because that

01:14includes hosting producing it's officially janet bugua which is my personal sort of like online brand

01:21hosting fixing the nation on ntv which is tv and radio and then i just decided to throw in cash

01:27money on netflix in there which i know a lot of people have just been like my friends were like

01:31what i love that getting so i think i use all these platforms uh to communicate and a lot of the roles

01:39are tied to social impact women's empowerment and i think just the collective role we have so even for

01:46the series cash money was a woman it was a governor and that's what sold me on it i'm like oh to play

01:51a governor okay otherwise i wasn't convinced i'm like what am i doing on set with acting legends um

01:57and then with the show and my platform there's a common thread there of conversations that matter

02:03and the roles that we play and i'm a mummy to two amazing boys as well and founder of inuadada

02:09wow janet so media personality founder and mum amazing so we'll find you where the change

02:16needs to be done and where change needs to be triggered so what does such a summit or platform

02:24means to you seeing like hundreds of women in the same room advancing progressive conversations

02:30does it do to your heart oh god i love spaces like this you could already see me and i've been part of

02:36what women want summit from the very beginning with pinky yeah i think he's a really good friend

02:40um somebody who we've been in the industry together and we kind of understand that and i was telling her

02:47just now i'm like do you realize what you're doing this is a movement like it's a proper movement and i

02:53think what's great about it is how it's categorized into so many subject matters um so it's it always makes

02:59me happy because i think women wake up to try and glean on ways that they can shift their perspectives

03:05and improve their lives and access services and information that will help them i feel like women

03:10are always curious and always want to learn men do it as well um differently but i think what's unique

03:17with how women come together is we almost come with an open mind and an ability to be like i just want

03:23to see what i can get from this session and then how i can apply it in my life so i love this summit and

03:29it's just gotten so big i'm really proud of everything that what women want team is doing

03:34what pinky is doing and i'm happy to be part of the movement lovely um like you said we are a 3.0 edition

03:40and it keeps getting bigger better and bolder um so there was a panel discussion you were hosting

03:46called dada culture um just tell us about the essence of dada culture and what are like three

03:53big nuggets that you want other women out there to know about dada culture oh that's a good one i should

03:58i should have been i should have been processing the nuggets that i just heard from my panel

04:02dada culture is a conversation that kind of speaks to how uh the women that are shifting culture

04:09and conversations in the country in the region globally um i feel like there's a lot of messages

04:16that women are have are thrown at women and a lot of the times people don't feel like they have

04:20permission to lean into who they really are because the world is telling you something different

04:25right the world is telling you you can't be an entertainer that's a side job you can't be a

04:29podcaster because what does that even mean and you can't balance that with motherhood because then

04:34you're a bad mom if you're doing one over the other i found myself on the receiving end of all of those

04:40perceptions but i just kept telling myself you're doing this because you know it's important and this

04:46is how you're trying to balance the hate will come the vitreo will come but you're following your

04:51true north and then i wanted to collaborate with other women who are setting that example because

04:56there's also an unhealthy sort of like hyper sexualized culture that's being encouraged what

05:03that does is you find a lot of younger women might say if i'm not part of that culture am i even on

05:10trend or do i does it can i get along with my peers when or can i even date when maybe this is the

05:16aesthetic that makes sense it's like no so i want to show you an example of women who are breaking who

05:22are just shifting culture in a way that can make you see yourself differently so i had lydia km

05:28angela waweru and lid and mudoni drama queen the nuggets were interesting angela said

05:33bare minimum you just really have to start by seeing yourself naked who are you naked and who are you with

05:40your clothes on which i think was brilliant so who are you when you sit with yourself and does it

05:45translate to who you are when you're out there if you can reconcile who you truly are it really forms

05:50the grounds within which you can move mudoni said something similar she said um because i asked her

05:57you've really evolved right you're an activist she was like no i'm an active citizen i don't necessarily

06:03like the activist brand but she said i'm a creator and even when i was young i was always in music and

06:09listening and loving music so even as i was getting all the barriers as i was growing now you're in

06:14you're getting a job you're in the job market oh that music thing should be a thing on the side

06:18now you're a mom whatever it is she said no i was always like what is the thing within me that i

06:23create that never ends even when everything around me is changing that's what i'm going to keep and

06:29even when the world around me is changing and shifting those are not truths like you coming and

06:35telling me because i'm a woman abcd that's your perception my perception is the truth and the joy i get

06:40from what i do and then lydia said um her living her life as a 30 something year old who isn't you

06:48know in a in a marriage and with a child is giving permission to other women to say i don't really

06:54have a timeline and therefore i'm living that not because i'm forcing issues because who i am

07:01speaks to what other women can be so i know those are more sentences than nuggets but it was very it was

07:08very fulfilling and it's achieved what i hope that a culture can continue to achieve which is

07:12you can hold multiple truths as a person as a woman and you don't have to be defined by what

07:18people say even though it affects you yeah you can have a conversation with that shame and with that

07:23anger and then don't carry it everywhere have a conversation with it say chill i'll come back and

07:29i'll talk to you soon i've heard what you have to say right now i'm going to go out there do my thing

07:33and can't keep coming back yeah and that's what i'm finding myself doing with the things that keep

07:38coming back like shame just like why are you here that's powerful i think it goes to one of our guests

07:44earlier was talking about the power of pivoting and i think that that culture does that it allows

07:50women to pivot yes um and i think while you were talking i was thinking about um you know the essence

07:56of sisterhood the essence of womanhood and someone else said um you know men thrive in their own habitat

08:04like that's their natural habitat so i feel like the culture that you're creating is to allow us as

08:10women to thrive in our own natural habitat that's so profound because this society has really pushed us

08:16as women you be emasculated you know if you're a single mom you're castigated by the society

08:23if you're handling too much or a powerhouse still the society feels like you know you're still

08:30denying us something here like you're not full on it's never enough it's never enough and you

08:35are what you do it's never enough and it's kind of getting worse and i that a culture for me is

08:40recognizing that there's a lot of vitriol and misogyny against women now probably more than before

08:46or it's amplified now more yes and i kind of just want women to have permission to say as long as i lean

08:52into my passion i know it'll come with persecution so how do i navigate persecution and what are my

08:58coping tools because persecution comes when you're chasing your passion i'm sure the two of you can

09:03speak to that like when i chose my dream there was some form of persecution either from friends

09:08family or community and you guys have managed to navigate it or you continue to but not a lot of

09:14people give themselves that permission so that a culture is like you have permission to recognize that

09:18you will be persecuted simply because you're a woman but you have permission to learn how to navigate

09:22that with certain tools and through the voices of those who have really continued to navigate and push

09:29through that's beautiful very very powerful one comment that i keep hearing is like living

09:35limitlessly like having no boundaries in how you define yourself how do you continue to walk in your

09:43authentic self what is it that you do to kind of you know of course society will have the self-fulfilling

09:49prophecy this is who janet should be what is that one thing you do to continue to walk in your

09:54authentic voice that's a really good question i think one of the things i have to ask myself is

09:59what do i love and what's sustainable because for me my bandwidth is always i'm like you know i've

10:05really stretched myself over the years and i've loved it but the more i go along the more i've given

10:10myself permission to say who i am to somebody might be oh this is two janet is and what she does

10:16but i'm also giving myself permission to step back when i need to pour into myself in a way that may not

10:23make sense to somebody else because i do have to sustain my bandwidth as somebody who is passionate

10:29about issues in this country and in the world also to sustain my bandwidth to raise my kids and to

10:35still find room to thrive in all that and i realized i just cannot continue to stretch things so

10:42i live in my authenticity because i say that's what people think what do i think what do i believe what

10:48do i know and how can i find if i need to a middle ground while still really protecting my bandwidth and

10:56my truth and my strength that's what's allowed me and that's what allows me to keep moving in the world

11:00i'm just like now i'm like i don't have to be at every single thing um or it's okay for me to

11:08pour into myself and to take time out if i need to take time out and that's something that's more and

11:14more really informing the decisions i make amazing um off here we were talking about uh the first time

11:20i heard you talk about intentional transition i think that was 2023 and seeing you live in your

11:26transition but also when you're talking about you know the years you've given to the grind

11:31yet when you look back you're like what facets of janet am i seeing in the grind or how much of me did i

11:39remove wow in that you know rat race uh trying to prove for the society i feel like the dada culture

11:46has the potential to give us that pause to reflect on is it is it worth it you don't have to be

11:53everywhere yeah you don't have to spread yourself thin yeah which is amazing it sort of give me

11:58validation because this year when i was starting was like i am starting to do things that shift

12:03power back to me yeah oh that's really powerful reclaim your power yeah like if it doesn't shift

12:12power back to me it doesn't need to exist in my life yeah and it's so important that you've come to

12:17that recognition because some might deem that as selfish and i think those are the narratives that

12:21women have been fed is like what do you mean pouring into me and mental and wellness and i'm

12:27like yeah how else you want me to exist so yeah we're kind of forced to wear many hats and we feel

12:32the pressure to carry all of them um i've reached a point where i'm just like no i'm i'm good with not

12:38i remember many years ago i asked somebody who was a quite an influential woman how do you do it all

12:44and she says no you can have everything you want just not at the same time and that helped me i was just

12:50like from that that was like five six years ago even longer i think it was eight years ago

12:53you can have everything you want should you so wish everything you want you just don't have to

12:58have it at the same time so it gives you time to pace yourself society feeds us then at this viral

13:05factor of you have to be an overnight you have to constantly have a million and one likes i'm like

13:09why everything is on demand everything is on demand it's like once we take that load off and say

13:13have i woken up today and walked in my purpose yeah okay i have have i chosen today to pour into

13:19myself have i chosen today to root myself back in my faith i think all of those things add up to build

13:25who you are and every day doesn't need to look the same you don't always have to be on yes which i

13:31have to tell myself sis you don't always have to be on so i'm firmly in my era of you don't always

13:36have to be on when you are give it your best and when you're not choose how to separate when you

13:41can point yourself and pour into others around you and that's giving me a balance and perspective

13:47that i haven't had before because life experience that's beautiful something else that's coming up

13:52in the conversation is the issue of faith you talked about faith yes like um what's your anchor

13:59like where do you go back to draw your your yeah your center wow that's powerful i think i'm in my

14:05book of lamentations right now in terms of i'm questioning you know i'm in that faith place where

14:10i'm rooted in god and faith and that right now i'm trying to reconcile certain things i've been

14:16through and asking like where were you where are you which a lot of people tell me that's very normal

14:21so it helps and i've got sort of spiritual people in my life who are like that's why there's an entire

14:26book where people were ranting so that helps me because i do believe i'm rooted in faith i'm evolving

14:32though in faith so sometimes i don't know how to i'm like god i don't know if i'm your best brand

14:37ambassador so i try not to oversell it but i also don't want to deny it anymore i did a video where

14:44i said i'm single sober celibate and created a lot of interesting conversations and i had to admit

14:49like well it's rooted in faith and i don't want to deny that perspective simply because i don't feel

14:55like i'm the most ideal faith person yeah but that's what grounds me and roots me um and just my

15:02grit and my gut also just going back to that from the time i was really young and a community of

15:08people around me including my kids who just remind me what's important and why those are really my

15:15that's really where i draw strength from i think yeah faith community again again yeah you're hearing a

15:23theme yeah faith community checking in in a walk and having those people that keep you grounded

15:31that remind you to feel i love because i think when we're so moving so quickly we almost become

15:37robotic in a way because with all this technology technology is great but it's like we're just on

15:44the go constantly so it forces you to feel like you just yeah have to keep being on the go but that's

15:49not how we're designed at all yeah um so janet before we wrap up um like the summit says what

15:56women want simply put we want to know what does janet want oh my gosh i feel like i even had

16:03insights to this question i still don't know the answer i think for me i think i just want to allow

16:11myself to um have a healthy relationship with some of the experiences i've had um so that they don't

16:19hold me back but rather they root me in what how i continue to become because i describe myself as a

16:25woman becoming which means i can't i don't want to definitively say this is what i do who i am

16:31i'm constantly becoming a better version so i think for me what i want is that because once i have a

16:36healthier relationship then i can thrive and work better be a better mom because i'm i fully know

16:42like yes maybe the shame will keep rearing its head but we have a new relationship now where we hear

16:48each other out then i put you back in your place that kind of thing is what i want and i'm pursuing

16:53that relentlessly but what i want for women is for them to just have permission to hold several truths

16:59that you can be busy but you can pour into yourself you can have good days and bad um it just doesn't

17:05make you it doesn't limit you it doesn't define you hold your multiple truths find a way that they

17:11make sense together and just move you know you don't have to be superwoman you don't have to save

17:15everybody yeah it's your must the last time you we were on the other side of the mic you were

17:20interviewing us so we're gonna give you one minute to ask us something oh that's so funny yes

17:26oh really yeah um what do you want and what do you want that's what i'll ask what does angie want

17:34uh well angie wants to live a life uh that is peaceful and led by love and really tapping into

17:43my inner voice unapologetically um i think sometimes our titles can overshadow us so literally i just want

17:51to be at the core who i am and feel liberated in each step that i take oh that's so profound yeah

17:57what about you let me take you to church okay yes ma'am so this is the year i feel like there's

18:05something happening within my own journey my own life so in the book of esther esther was prepared for

18:12her kingdom and queen dom for a whole year so she was uh eating the best food the best perfumes

18:19slow living taking care taken care of i'm in that era i don't have to work if i don't have to work

18:27yeah i'll be taken care of like my sustenance is not in my hands yes queen that's why i am this is

18:34where i i was talking to my sister-in-law who's also called mo just yesterday no way and that's what

18:39i'm seeing for myself everything you just described because i was watching megan sussex right yes on her

18:45show with love megan and i'm just like i want to in the near future as soon as next year

18:50be able to just wake up and make jam she makes jam and she was making preserves and she was putting

18:56all these flowers together and i remember saying with mo just yesterday and we were saying this is

19:03where we want to be and that we don't want to be apologetic about slow living so yeah

19:07i love what you said about sometimes our titles that's very profound thank you for that and thank

19:16you for validating that slowly can we please not undermine we don't always have to be on

19:20let's be like megan yeah harvesting greens she makes candles every time i'm watching an episode i'm

19:26like oh megan i want to be you that's so therapeutic just being able to do and that kind of slow living

19:32uh from family living farmhouse it's not far-fetched like if anything we can bring our lifestyle from

19:40nairobi somewhere nyandaro somewhere nanyuki and just wake up enough fresh air those small things are

19:47luxury it's my current fantasy so i'm not there yet but i know i'm like girl you know where you want to be

19:54yeah like i just want to be in the middle of the forest yeah they know there's a girl with a black

19:59color goes in there that but they don't know what happens there yeah wow janet thank you so much

20:06thank you guys very wholesome mini podcast yeah actually i feel like it's a whole podcast you know

20:12before she goes she needs to tell us what's in her bag what's in my bag it can be physical or

20:17imaginary bag what do you carry with yourself all the time you all just through these deep questions

20:23and expect us to think about food coming for you in my bag maybe i can say what i always have in my

20:29bag bag is my airpods lip balm phone charger um gum those are just like my go-to body spray

20:37i think yeah and i try to carry a little a little something like a booklet like a affirmations

20:43booklet just a tiny one nice that's what's in my emotional bag or in my what other bag imaginary

20:49it can be emotional it can be you can't leave the day like you can't like something that you carry

20:54follows you like a handbag i think i think intentionality and um and being present is my

21:03latest accessory and not just saying it for fun and using a buzzword i was just like man

21:08literally i just have to be present in that i'm present now and then i'll leave and wherever i am

21:15i have to be present then i'm prone to anxiety and that has really allowed me to just say you don't

21:20have to solve whatever's happening in the next two hours um last week my whole family and i were down

21:25down like we were all sick like it was just weird um and i had to practice that i'm like you're unwell

21:31today you can't even leave your bed you're that sick you're on bed rest so just be present in it

21:35grieve cry whatever but just be present yeah and then figure out tomorrow when it comes

21:40that's really helping me considering i have a lot on my plate so i would say just being present and

21:46intentional moment by moment is really really helping me love that's the bag amazing lastly i think this

21:54is a whole podcast remember lastly 10 i am done again how many i'm done have brought you where you

22:02are right now whoa more and angie surely yes how many moments have i'm done i'm never doing that again

22:10is that what you mean like how many i'm done yeah those moments brought you to here like the boldest i'm

22:16done i don't know if i can speak to that one okay that one was hey i know i know happy to share what

22:25yeah i'm done i think that yeah i think the biggest one which was very hard was you know

22:33leaving leaving a long-term relationship and was very public it was very there but i know that was

22:39when i was just like hey if you can leave this one because it's not what it's supposed to be

22:44then i think you're starting to form your boundaries so i would say that was it it was

22:50the biggest because it's such a it's such a big thing you know almost 10 years you know children in

22:57the mix and then you're saying i'm not doing this that's probably the biggest one i think i shifted how

23:02i saw the world yeah not easy but um but necessary and just like if you were able to put up that

23:08boundary then you can allow yourself to put other boundaries that don't serve you

23:13yes we actually need to have you on another full i'm coming this was like therapeutic so thank you

23:21guys um so janet thank you so much for overreacting with us and so of course we have a way that we

23:26like to sign out so we're just gonna say let's and you're gonna say overreact okay all right okay

23:31so ladies let's overreact

23:34so ladies let's overreact

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OVAReact Podcast S05 E07 - What Women Want With Janet Mbugua

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