The Sensitive Heart Of Darkness By Alastair Jessiman

Oldtuberadio

Heart of Darkness, Part 1 The Sensitive  1/2. By Alastair Jessiman.  A religious retreat in the Scottish Highlands becomes the venue for the final investigation by the psychic Thomas Soutar. He travels north, accompanied by his girlfriend Kat, but they discover that the extreme views of their host have alienated many people in the community, and a quiet few days away become unexpectedly life-changing when Thomas feels the full force of local resentment and has a fateful reckoning with his psychic abilities.  Other parts played by the cast.  Producer/director: Bruce Young  BBC Scotland.  Credits Role Contributor Thomas Soutar Robin Laing Kat Logan Julie Duncanson Rollo Caldwell Steven Duffy Aaron Caldwell Sean Biggerstaff Fraser Mackinnon Sean Scanlan Suzanne Glenn Molly Innes Director Bruce Young Producer Bruce Young Writer Alastair Jessiman  Heart of Darkness, Part 2 The Sensitive  2 / 2. By Alastair Jessiman.  During a visit to a religious retreat in the Highlands, psychic Thomas Soutar is seriously injured by a hit-and run driver. He's convinced that the hit-and-run was attempted murder but that it was his host, Rollo Caldwell, who was the real target. When Rollo later goes missing, Thomas fears the worst and starts enquiries into what will prove to be his final case.  Other parts played by the cast.  Producer/director: Bruce Young BBC Scotland.  Credits Role Contributor Thomas Soutar Robin Laing Kat Logan Julie Duncanson Rollo Caldwell Steven Duffy Aaron Caldwell Sean Biggerstaff Fraser Mackinnon Sean Scanlan Suzanne Glenn Molly Innes David Glenn Liam Brennan DI Slater Douglas Russell Director Bruce Young Producer Bruce Young Writer Alastair Jessiman  Do you enjoy the variety on Oldtuberadio? Like, Share and Subscribe to be notified of our new shows #radio #crime #thriller #drama To Support this channel please visit https://www.buymeacoffee.com/oldtuberadio https://ko-fi.com/oldtuberadio98 https://www.patreon.com/oldtuberadio https://locals.com/Oldtuberadio

Transcript

00:00:00If I'd known what was going to happen, I'd have made provision.

00:00:12I'd have spent longer, for example, just taking in her faith,

00:00:17registering every mark, every freckle.

00:00:25The Sensitive Heart of Darkness by Alistair Jessamine

00:00:29Part One

00:00:31I can't see.

00:00:44No, I can't see a thing. Can I put the wee light on?

00:00:48Not where I'm driving.

00:00:50Oh, I think this must be the turn-off.

00:00:56Sorry, not much of a navigator.

00:00:59No.

00:01:03Were you ever in love with Rolo?

00:01:04No. I told you it was just a fling.

00:01:08Rolo had a fling with everybody. We all had flings with each other at university.

00:01:13Well, you do at that age.

00:01:15I didn't.

00:01:16Not so many opportunities working for your mum in Danone.

00:01:19I was a bit wary of him, to be honest.

00:01:23There was always something scary about Rolo.

00:01:26Scary?

00:01:27Mmm.

00:01:29You nervous about seeing him again?

00:01:31No.

00:01:34A bit.

00:01:35An old university friend of Katz had invited me to give a talk on my life as a psychic.

00:01:48The venue was The Refuge, a Christian retreat centre.

00:01:53A place, as the brochure put it, designed for spiritual and therapeutic practice.

00:01:58A place of tranquillity and respite, located amidst the beautiful scenery of the Scottish Highlands.

00:02:05Unquote.

00:02:07The place where everything changed for me.

00:02:11The place where I had my reckoning with the information.

00:02:15We must have been going round in circles for two hours.

00:02:22Well, you're here now, eh?

00:02:23Top up, Thomas.

00:02:25Ah, thanks.

00:02:28How long have you lived in the cottage, Rolo?

00:02:30About five years.

00:02:32It was kind of funny coming back.

00:02:34I was brought up here, Thomas.

00:02:35I can't say it, yeah.

00:02:36Well, not in the cottage here, in the main house over at The Refuge.

00:02:41So, what do you think of the wood burner?

00:02:43Is it not a handsome piece of work?

00:02:45Yeah.

00:02:47Got it for a song in Inverness.

00:02:49No, it's ideal living here.

00:02:51Retreat centre, three minutes walk, but I've got my own space.

00:02:54Workshop out the back, village ten minutes away.

00:02:58You're set for tomorrow, sir?

00:02:59Aye.

00:03:00Well, I haven't prepared much.

00:03:02I was just going to talk off the cuff.

00:03:04I really appreciate you coming.

00:03:06Why did you come back here, Rolo?

00:03:09I came back when Dad died.

00:03:10And, well, just didn't leave, really.

00:03:13I thought you might have become a Christian.

00:03:16No, no.

00:03:18I don't know what you'd call me.

00:03:19An alchemist, maybe?

00:03:21They're a bit of a conservative bunch over there.

00:03:24I like to broaden their horizons.

00:03:26That's why I suggested we have some visiting speakers.

00:03:29So, what do you do here, Rolo?

00:03:30A bit of maintenance, the gardens.

00:03:32I dip in and out and try not to interfere too much.

00:03:35And I've got my workshop.

00:03:37Shh.

00:03:38Listen.

00:03:40Oh.

00:03:41The bell for vespers.

00:03:43Fraser likes his bells.

00:03:45Big bell for morning prayers and vespers.

00:03:47We bell for everything else.

00:03:49And I do the books for them.

00:03:52They have no head for money, that lot.

00:03:54Unlike this man, Tommy.

00:03:56Always winning at the horses.

00:03:58Always up at poker.

00:04:00It's knowing when to stop.

00:04:03Cat here, she didn't know when to stop.

00:04:04I could read her like a book as well.

00:04:07I never told you this, but whenever you had a good hand at poker,

00:04:10your legs would jiggle about.

00:04:11No.

00:04:12Yep.

00:04:13Shouldn't have told you.

00:04:15I could have fleeced you when you were here, Mags.

00:04:17Mags?

00:04:18Duff nickname.

00:04:20Someone once said she looked like Princess Margaret,

00:04:22and it was shortened to Mags.

00:04:24You don't look anything like Princess Margaret.

00:04:26That was the joke.

00:04:28Oh.

00:04:32Any other questions for Mr. Souter?

00:04:35Roro?

00:04:36Aye.

00:04:37You've been very open, Thomas,

00:04:39about how ambivalent you feel about these psychic abilities of yours.

00:04:43What was the word you used to describe them?

00:04:45The information.

00:04:47Right.

00:04:48So, if you could have the information surgically removed,

00:04:51would you have the operation?

00:04:53Good question.

00:04:55I don't know.

00:04:59Thanks again for a very interesting lecture, Thomas.

00:05:02It's a pleasure.

00:05:03So, how long have you been leader here, Fraser?

00:05:06Since Michael, Roro's father, died.

00:05:08About five years now.

00:05:10He and I started the place.

00:05:12It used to be a farm.

00:05:14The refectory here was originally a big barn.

00:05:17Mr. Souter, thank you very much.

00:05:19Adam, Roro's brother.

00:05:21Nice to meet you.

00:05:22This is Cat, my partner.

00:05:24Hello there, Cat.

00:05:24Hi.

00:05:26Fraser, have you got the photocopies for Vespers?

00:05:28No, I left them by the tea counter.

00:05:31Would you both like to join us, by the way,

00:05:33for the service?

00:05:35Oh, I'm a bit tired, actually.

00:05:37Yeah, I think we could do with an early night.

00:05:39Yeah.

00:05:40Okay.

00:05:40Excuse me.

00:05:42And what do you do, Cat?

00:05:44I'm a journalist.

00:05:45Oh.

00:05:46Oh, hang on.

00:05:47Here's trouble.

00:05:49Thomas.

00:05:50Brilliant.

00:05:50Well done.

00:05:51Thanks, Roro.

00:05:52I'd like you both to meet Suzanne Glenn.

00:05:53Hi.

00:05:54Hello.

00:05:54Well, Suzanne is one of our therapists here.

00:05:57I'm the Green Councilor,

00:05:58and on the Board of Fifty Charities.

00:06:00Suzanne is a perfect saint.

00:06:02Now, Rollo.

00:06:03Well, you are.

00:06:05I was very interested in what you had to say, Thomas.

00:06:07Especially when you were talking about reading objects.

00:06:10The psychometry?

00:06:11Yes.

00:06:12Fascinating.

00:06:14I mean, the information.

00:06:16It doesn't happen all the time, presumably.

00:06:19Oh, no.

00:06:20So, is it just something you can turn on and off?

00:06:22It's not quite like that.

00:06:24But if I pass you that cup and saucer there,

00:06:26would you feel anything?

00:06:28I dug it.

00:06:29Hang on, then.

00:06:29There you go, Thomas.

00:06:33Oh, I'm sorry.

00:06:35Clumsy.

00:06:36Oh, no harm done.

00:06:37I'll just get a dustpan.

00:06:39Well, you cleverly avoided that wee exercise, Thomas.

00:06:47Friendly bunch, weren't they?

00:06:48Hmm.

00:06:50Weren't they?

00:06:50Yeah.

00:06:52Oh, you did well, Tommy.

00:06:55Aye.

00:06:56I seemed to engage with it all.

00:06:57Aw, are you all right?

00:07:01See, when I dropped that cup and saucer...

00:07:02Yeah.

00:07:03...it wasn't just an accident.

00:07:05As soon as I touched it,

00:07:06it was as if this malevolent charge went up my arm.

00:07:10A malevolent charge?

00:07:12Yeah.

00:07:13It doesn't have to mean anything, of course.

00:07:16Could have just been someone's passing mood.

00:07:18Or nothing at all.

00:07:19Do you know whose cup it was?

00:07:23No.

00:07:25Hey, best turn the light out, eh?

00:07:27Hmm.

00:07:39Quite a while ago,

00:07:40Cat had lost interest in the information.

00:07:44She was tired of my voices and my visions.

00:07:46So the next morning,

00:07:49I didn't tell her about my dream.

00:07:52Rolo and I were sitting side by side

00:07:54in the carriage of this old steam train.

00:07:56At the opposite end of the carriage

00:07:58were three people drinking tea.

00:08:01Three of the people I'd met that evening.

00:08:04Fraser, the leader.

00:08:06Rolo's brother, Aaron.

00:08:07And the therapist, Suzanne.

00:08:10All unsmiling.

00:08:12Very serious.

00:08:13And Rolo was mocking them.

00:08:17Look at me.

00:08:19The Holy Trinity.

00:08:23Then we entered the tunnel.

00:08:25And in the darkness,

00:08:26I sensed one of the three coming towards us.

00:08:29And I had the same feeling of malevolence

00:08:31I'd experienced earlier that evening.

00:08:39It's just a hobby, really.

00:08:41I started making a bit of money out, though.

00:08:43Oh, it's so intricate, Rolo.

00:08:47A little universe.

00:08:50Tommy, come and have a look.

00:08:52I'm just admiring the grandfather clock.

00:08:54Oh, him.

00:08:55Yes, he's a handsome old boy.

00:08:57Pull up a chair, Tommy.

00:09:01How'd you start to work on something like this?

00:09:04This one's quite easy.

00:09:06That wee wheel there has just come detached.

00:09:08Could you pass me the tweezers, Cat?

00:09:11There you go.

00:09:12This one is my own watch, actually.

00:09:18American Railroad Pocket Watch.

00:09:20Very collectible.

00:09:22Railroad?

00:09:23Yes.

00:09:23Beautifully made.

00:09:24Had to be extremely precise.

00:09:26About 1890, this one, I think.

00:09:28So, these psychic abilities of yours, Tommy, could you just move slightly for the light?

00:09:35Thanks.

00:09:37They don't seem to make you particularly happy.

00:09:40Not particularly.

00:09:41They don't have any say in them?

00:09:43Any choice whether they come or go?

00:09:45Not really.

00:09:45They don't think you could just turn your back on them.

00:09:49What, by willpower or something?

00:09:51I don't know.

00:09:52Maybe.

00:09:53I don't think so.

00:09:54I mean, they seem to rule your life.

00:09:58I don't pretend to understand it all, but it could be you're using them to stay a bit

00:10:03miserable, a bit stuck.

00:10:05A bit stuck?

00:10:06I don't think so.

00:10:08Maybe you find happiness threatening.

00:10:10What do you think, Cat?

00:10:11Does Tommy find happiness threatening?

00:10:13Well, it's possible, is it?

00:10:16Well, just tightening it now, and lovely.

00:10:24Shall we go over to the retreat centre after lunch?

00:10:27I'll show you both round.

00:10:34Rose were the stable blocks, which were made into dorms.

00:10:36That's the original farmhouse.

00:10:38Used to be the main centre.

00:10:40Chapel just behind it.

00:10:41And the comical figure in the woolly hat poaching in the lawnmower is my brother.

00:10:46May I present Aaron, hell's angel, handsome heartbreaker, a girl in every highland port.

00:10:50We met last night.

00:10:51Hello again.

00:10:52Hi.

00:10:53Hi, Aaron.

00:10:54Rollo, you were meant to be taking the work period this morning.

00:10:57Well, I've got visitors.

00:10:59Tell you what, though, me and Cat could supervise the gardening and catch up a bit,

00:11:03if you wouldn't mind showing Tommy round.

00:11:05That okay, Tommy?

00:11:06Yeah.

00:11:08Come on, Mags.

00:11:08I'll give you a back on the lawnmower.

00:11:10Off you get, Aaron.

00:11:20How many people have you got on retreat at the moment, Aaron?

00:11:23Only about 20.

00:11:24We're struggling just now.

00:11:27Financially and so on.

00:11:30Excuse me.

00:11:32Yes?

00:11:33No, that's okay.

00:11:36Have we got enough veg?

00:11:38Yep, okay.

00:11:41Short-staffed.

00:11:42I've got to make dinner.

00:11:44Have you time to show me land?

00:11:46Yes, fine.

00:11:48This is the chapel here.

00:11:49The altar's Iona marble.

00:11:55Beautiful.

00:11:57What do you make of the altar piece?

00:11:58I'm sorry.

00:12:03I find it a bit...

00:12:06It's well done.

00:12:08The way the dead tree and Christ's body kind of twist together like that.

00:12:12Hmm.

00:12:14Fraser and Dad commissioned it.

00:12:16Local artist.

00:12:18Rulo hates it.

00:12:19Grotesque, he says.

00:12:21Thomas.

00:12:21You all right?

00:12:30Look at me.

00:12:32The Holy Trinity.

00:12:35You okay, Thomas?

00:12:41I just feel a bit faint.

00:12:43Do you mind if we go outside?

00:12:49Bad move, Fraser.

00:12:50There goes your castle.

00:12:52I don't know why I turn up every week for this ritual of humiliation.

00:12:55To escape your onerous role as shepherd to your flock and have a good dinner.

00:12:59He's good at poker, too.

00:13:01He used to beat his father at chess from when he was in short trousers.

00:13:04But cautious of it.

00:13:06Right.

00:13:09I'm off to bed.

00:13:11Night, night.

00:13:12Night, dear.

00:13:12Night.

00:13:13I won't be long, Kat.

00:13:15You finished that book I lent you?

00:13:18Which book?

00:13:19Dawkins.

00:13:20I haven't started it.

00:13:22The blind watchmaker.

00:13:23The God Delusion.

00:13:24You read it, Tommy?

00:13:25Not yet.

00:13:27There's probably no God.

00:13:29Now stop worrying and enjoy your life.

00:13:31That's the man.

00:13:32Hardly a slogan to hang your life on.

00:13:34You need to read it, Fraser.

00:13:36I need to know what the opposition is thinking.

00:13:38I'm trying to concentrate.

00:13:39Ah, hang on.

00:13:41Be very careful here.

00:13:42One of them could finish me off.

00:13:44The bishop, the knight, or the queen.

00:13:46Can I just play my own game, please?

00:13:47If you get this move wrong, you're the one in trouble.

00:13:50Rollo, would you please refrain?

00:13:53Oh, fact is, Thomas.

00:13:55Fraser's mind's a bit on the slow side these days.

00:13:58All that vegetarian food, maybe.

00:14:01I'm winning our religious debates, hands down.

00:14:03You need some new strategies, Fraser.

00:14:06Help yourself to another whiskey, Tommy.

00:14:08I'm okay, thanks.

00:14:09I'm taking that pawn.

00:14:10Sure.

00:14:11You can take it back if you like.

00:14:12Sure.

00:14:13Checkmate and two moves.

00:14:14Impossible.

00:14:15No, look.

00:14:16I take your bishop, and then you can only move your queen.

00:14:19I take her and checkmate.

00:14:21Ah, dear me.

00:14:23Another game.

00:14:24It's late.

00:14:25I better be on my way.

00:14:26Drink before you go.

00:14:28No!

00:14:29No, I'll be off.

00:14:30Hang on a sec.

00:14:32I've got some homemade marmalade for you.

00:14:34Sorry, I got a little heated over, Chess.

00:14:42Rather boring evening for you.

00:14:44No, it was fine.

00:14:46Be wary of Rollo, Thomas.

00:14:48Hmm?

00:14:49He collects people.

00:14:51Here we go.

00:14:52I think you'll like it.

00:14:54Pecan't without being presumptuous.

00:14:59Morning.

00:15:00Morning.

00:15:01Oh, there's fresh coffee there.

00:15:03Hmm, please.

00:15:06Rollo, not up.

00:15:07He's up.

00:15:08Left us a note.

00:15:10More like an essay.

00:15:11The pith being that he's nipped out to Blackwater Falls to take photos.

00:15:15Blackwater Falls?

00:15:16Where's that?

00:15:17It's a local beauty spot.

00:15:19He's given us some directions if you want to join him.

00:15:21I'm all right, actually.

00:15:22Well, if you don't fancy joining him now,

00:15:24he suggests we meet him for a pub lunch with Suzanne and her husband.

00:15:28Who's Suzanne?

00:15:29The therapist woman.

00:15:31Oh, hi.

00:15:34You know this fling you had with Rollo at uni?

00:15:37Yeah.

00:15:38How long did it last?

00:15:39Oh, I can't remember, Tommy.

00:15:42About?

00:15:43Not long.

00:15:46Look, if you'd prefer to go, we don't have to wait until Monday.

00:15:50Rollo can be a bit full on.

00:15:51I know I'm not finding it so easy myself.

00:15:53No, I need to stay.

00:15:56Neat.

00:15:57I'd like to stay.

00:16:00So how long have you worked at the refuge, Suzanne?

00:16:02About 15 years.

00:16:04Oh.

00:16:04And what kind of therapist are you?

00:16:06She's a follower of Wilhelm Reich.

00:16:09She's particularly interested in the orgasm and how it impacts on Rollo.

00:16:11Oh, shut up, Rollo.

00:16:14Mindfulness-based stuff, really.

00:16:17But all done within a context of study and prayer.

00:16:20You're thinking of building an orgasmatron in the refuge.

00:16:23Oh, dear.

00:16:24Intriguing image.

00:16:25I don't think we're going to have much of a serious discussion today.

00:16:30Beautiful day.

00:16:32Bit weird for October, though.

00:16:34David apologises for not coming, by the way.

00:16:36Oh, yes.

00:16:38Sundays are never his favourite day.

00:16:40My husband suffers from depression.

00:16:42Oh, dear.

00:16:44I'm sorry.

00:16:45You know, I really think you need a break, Suzanne.

00:16:48She looks after David and her mother.

00:16:51They owe her worker here at the refuge and at the council.

00:16:53So, you should go to Venice.

00:16:55Venice?

00:16:56You've always wanted to go.

00:16:58You don't look after yourself.

00:17:00Rollo, I don't have time to fit in a shopping trip to Inverness.

00:17:03You need to be more selfish.

00:17:05Like you?

00:17:06Mm-hmm.

00:17:08The guy you used to go out with at University Cat, Colin,

00:17:11he got injured at rugby and ended up in a wheelchair.

00:17:14Yeah?

00:17:15When you broke up with him, I was impressed.

00:17:18I remember you saying how you almost stayed with him out of pity,

00:17:21but you knew you couldn't for your own sake.

00:17:24Well, it wasn't that simple.

00:17:27Why do you mention it, Rollo?

00:17:28Look after yourself, Suzanne.

00:17:31Go to Venice.

00:17:32And who would look after Mum and David?

00:17:35We would.

00:17:36Aaron, me, Fraser, the rest of us.

00:17:38I'd like to see you looking after Mother.

00:17:41Thing is, she'd get on fine without you.

00:17:44That's what you can't face.

00:17:45As long as she's got her people's friend and an adequate supply of gin,

00:17:49she's perfectly happy.

00:17:51Right.

00:17:52Same again all round.

00:17:53Tommy, Cat.

00:17:54Thanks, Rollo.

00:17:55Thanks.

00:17:58It wasn't that simple with Colin.

00:18:01How do you mean?

00:18:02We were kind of breaking up anyway, before he was injured.

00:18:07Here we are, eh?

00:18:09Everybody in T-shirts and blouses.

00:18:11In October.

00:18:12Like you said, Thomas, it's not right.

00:18:14No.

00:18:15But people don't like to talk about it.

00:18:17And when they do talk about it, climate change,

00:18:19it's something that's going to happen in the future.

00:18:23They say, you know, it's the grandchildren I feel sorry for.

00:18:27It's not even my grandchildren.

00:18:29No, it's the grandchildren's problem.

00:18:31When in reality, the catastrophe is here.

00:18:34It's happening now.

00:18:36Oh, damn.

00:18:38There's a clean napkin.

00:18:39Press that against it.

00:18:40No, no, no.

00:18:40There's a piece of glass in there.

00:18:42Tommy, there'll be a first aid box behind the bar.

00:18:45Oh, dear.

00:18:49We dressed Suzanne's hand and she drove home not long afterwards.

00:18:54Kat, Rolo and I stayed for another couple of hours and got a bit drunk.

00:18:57The images from that afternoon as we walked home from the pub remain clear and vivid in my mind.

00:19:04The country lane, the low sun and soft light, the autumn colours, reds, golds.

00:19:13And my last memory, Rolo's animated face.

00:19:20And Kat, a little ahead of us in her bright green fleece.

00:19:24I used to see owls round here.

00:19:27Used to follow you home at twilight.

00:19:29Far and owls?

00:19:30Yeah.

00:19:30I'm thinking of putting some boxes up for them in the garden.

00:19:34Come on, you two!

00:19:36What's the rush?

00:19:38Steam trip.

00:19:39Over there.

00:19:40Yeah.

00:19:42They have an old line.

00:19:43Tourist attraction.

00:19:45Goes all the way up to Inverness.

00:19:47Look like a bike in it, mind you.

00:19:49But pretty.

00:19:51You okay?

00:19:52That tree.

00:19:56What about it?

00:19:58Dead.

00:20:00Twisted.

00:20:01Uh-huh.

00:20:07One of them can finish me off from the bishop, the knight or the queen.

00:20:11In a way, the dead tree and Christ's body can twist together like that.

00:20:18What's that?

00:20:22Tommy!

00:20:23Tommy!

00:20:29Tommy!

00:20:30Kat!

00:20:31Kat!

00:20:32I'm here!

00:20:33Don't move!

00:20:34Kat, what's happening?

00:20:36I can't see!

00:20:51Kat!

00:20:52I'm still here, Tommy.

00:20:55I want to see your face.

00:20:58Kat, I'm scared.

00:21:00Shh, now.

00:21:01You need to sleep, Tommy.

00:21:03Come on, get some sleep.

00:21:12I turned round.

00:21:14I saw the car.

00:21:15I pushed Rolo away, and that's all I remember.

00:21:21No memory of the car at all?

00:21:23The make?

00:21:25Just that it was red.

00:21:28Red car.

00:21:30And no memory of who was driving, sir?

00:21:32No.

00:21:33The nature and extent of the injury suggests irreparable damage to the visual cortex.

00:21:46Irreparable?

00:21:47I'm afraid so.

00:21:48In hospital, I'd been yearning for the familiarity and reassurance of home.

00:22:02But when I did finally get home, everything was unfamiliar, alien.

00:22:07It's the visual sense, more than the other senses that particularises, draws boundaries.

00:22:13It's the visual sense that keeps the chaos at bay.

00:22:18Up here, work.

00:22:24Damn it!

00:22:25Is that you, Kat?

00:22:26Mm-hmm.

00:22:28How you doing?

00:22:29I can't see my work, this radio.

00:22:31Give it here.

00:22:33Right, the big buttons for the stations.

00:22:35I don't know what I did.

00:22:37I couldn't turn the volume down either.

00:22:39Well, the volume's top left, remember?

00:22:41Hmm, I, uh...

00:22:43Had a good day.

00:22:45Not bad.

00:22:46When did the lady from social services leave?

00:22:49About three.

00:22:51She reckons we can get funding.

00:22:53She was talking about phones, a special computer.

00:22:56Oh, that's great.

00:22:57Yeah, doing things to the kitchen.

00:23:00Good?

00:23:01Yeah, all good.

00:23:02Do you want a drink?

00:23:03Kat.

00:23:04What?

00:23:06What?

00:23:07I feel I'm going crazy.

00:23:08Well, you're not, are you?

00:23:10You're going to be all right, Tommy, OK?

00:23:13OK.

00:23:14I got an email from Rolo today.

00:23:16Rolo, what did he say?

00:23:17Well, they apologise for not getting in touch.

00:23:20He promised to give you a phone very soon.

00:23:21Hmm.

00:23:23I wonder if he's taking what I told the police seriously.

00:23:25Oh, you don't need to worry about that.

00:23:27You've got enough to worry about.

00:23:28It was deliberate, Kat.

00:23:29Tommy.

00:23:30Whoever was driving that car was out to get Rolo.

00:23:32It all happened so fast, didn't it?

00:23:46All I can remember, like you, it was red.

00:23:48Bright red.

00:23:49Hmm.

00:23:49I feel terrible about it all, Tommy.

00:23:51It wasn't your fault, Rolo.

00:23:53No, but Kat was saying your consultant thinks this is permanent.

00:23:56Aye.

00:23:57Look, I've got a friend in Elgin.

00:23:59I'm just wondering if it might not be an idea to have a second opinion.

00:24:02My doctor seemed pretty convinced.

00:24:04Aye, but there's no harm in seeking a second opinion.

00:24:06It's pointless, Rolo.

00:24:08I trust this bloke.

00:24:10Okay.

00:24:10But if you change your mind, just let me know.

00:24:13There were things up there.

00:24:15Oh, nothing changes.

00:24:17Aaron and I had a bit of a falling out, but that's nothing new either.

00:24:21Listen, this may be a mad idea, Tommy, but I'd like you to come back up here and stay for a bit.

00:24:26Stay with me.

00:24:28You know, a bit of a holiday in the country.

00:24:30What do you think?

00:24:31I could do with a break.

00:24:33I had to be cooped up.

00:24:34You're just getting used to being here.

00:24:37Getting familiar with your surroundings.

00:24:40It's too soon, and it's really busy at work at the moment.

00:24:43You don't have to come with me.

00:24:45So what?

00:24:46Leave you in the safe hands of Mr Responsible?

00:24:48I'd be fine.

00:24:50And going up there wouldn't have anything to do with snooping around, I suppose.

00:24:53Snooping around?

00:24:54You know what I mean.

00:24:55It would give me a project, a distraction.

00:24:58It's not the kind of distraction you need right now.

00:25:00I'd like to go.

00:25:04Blind, Kat.

00:25:06For the rest of my life.

00:25:09It just seemed to really hit me today.

00:25:13I'm never able to see your face again.

00:25:15She came with me in the end.

00:25:17And though I protested, I was very glad of her company.

00:25:21It had been months since I'd last been in Rollo's workshop.

00:25:25It was a different world now.

00:25:27Perceived in a different way.

00:25:28And the person sitting next to me, with his shoulder resting against mine, was a different person.

00:25:36He seemed much less...

00:25:39knowable.

00:25:42Kat's been great.

00:25:44In all sorts of ways.

00:25:45Coming up and staying here with me when she's so busy.

00:25:48Must be very difficult for her too.

00:25:50Oh well, of course.

00:25:51You're so different, the pair of you.

00:25:55Are we?

00:25:56Don't you think?

00:25:57Not that different.

00:25:59Anyway, opposites attract.

00:26:01Sure.

00:26:03This one's kind of defeated me.

00:26:05Pity.

00:26:05Lovely clock.

00:26:07No way I can replace that cog though.

00:26:09Look Tommy, sorry to bring this up again, but this guy I know in Elgin, this specialist...

00:26:15Let's leave it, Rollo.

00:26:16He's very good, top of his field.

00:26:17Please, can we leave it?

00:26:20What's the time?

00:26:23Now you're asking.

00:26:258, 8.30, 20 to 3, 12.07 by the grandfather.

00:26:31It's 8.15 by my trusty pocket watch.

00:26:35I'll synchronise them all tomorrow.

00:26:39Sounds great when they all chime the hour at the same time.

00:26:42Kat's probably lost in a book.

00:26:44See, it's taken me over to the refuge.

00:26:46You going to Vespers?

00:26:48Hmm.

00:26:49Just fancied it.

00:26:52They've lost their way a bit over there, I must say.

00:26:55What do you mean?

00:26:56It's all so dreary.

00:26:58Conventional.

00:26:59You know what they should have over that altar inside?

00:27:01That awful crucifixion.

00:27:03The devil.

00:27:04Bit of fire.

00:27:04I suggested it to Fraser recently, but it didn't go down very well.

00:27:10Why do you stay here, Rollo?

00:27:12Oh, it's home, isn't it?

00:27:15And I want to look out for them all over there.

00:27:17Wake them up.

00:27:18Provoke them a bit.

00:27:19Maybe you provoked them a bit too much.

00:27:22Yeah?

00:27:23I'm sure somebody meant to kill you that afternoon.

00:27:26So you said.

00:27:27Somebody I provoked.

00:27:29Maybe.

00:27:29Oh, come on, Tommy.

00:27:31Okay, I like to argue.

00:27:32Shake people up a bit.

00:27:34Nobody's going to run me over for that.

00:27:36Please, be careful.

00:27:38Thus speak the psychic.

00:27:39Just be careful.

00:27:41May the Lord bless us and keep us.

00:27:54May the Lord make his face to shine upon us.

00:27:57And be gracious to us.

00:27:59May the Lord lift his countenance upon us.

00:28:01And give us peace.

00:28:03Amen.

00:28:03Would you like me to take you back?

00:28:12A cat shouldn't be too long, Fraser.

00:28:14If you don't mind me waiting.

00:28:15No, no.

00:28:16Oh, listen.

00:28:17Please visit any time.

00:28:19Just give us a ring and one of us will come for you.

00:28:23We're all terribly sorry about what happened.

00:28:27How have you been?

00:28:27Well, not great.

00:28:32No.

00:28:33Now, you seek explanation for these things, don't you?

00:28:36But as I get older, so much suffering just seems random.

00:28:40Senseless.

00:28:42Well, would you like a whiskey?

00:28:43I'm fine, thanks.

00:28:44Do you mind if...

00:28:45No, no.

00:28:49If there's anything we can do, please just say.

00:28:52Sure.

00:28:53Thanks.

00:28:56I really miss being able to see colour.

00:28:58The stained glass in your chapel.

00:29:00To be able to see that again.

00:29:03The front door on Rollo's cottage.

00:29:05That lime green.

00:29:08The colour of your car on the forecourt.

00:29:09The scarlet.

00:29:11That was scarlet.

00:29:12Scarlet?

00:29:12Aye.

00:29:14Rollo's been very kind.

00:29:16He feels guilty, I think.

00:29:17No reason why he should.

00:29:21Fraser, remember that night?

00:29:23After your chess game, you said to me to be wary of Rollo.

00:29:26That he collects people.

00:29:28What did you mean?

00:29:29Did I say that?

00:29:31Yeah.

00:29:32Well, I was probably just in a bad mood.

00:29:35Losing again.

00:29:37You sure you won't have a drink?

00:29:39No, no.

00:29:40Thanks.

00:29:42I'll pour the rest of this back in the bottle, actually.

00:29:44Don't like drinking on my own.

00:29:49Especially careful here, Tommy.

00:29:50The ground's very uneven.

00:29:52There's lots of tree roots.

00:29:54Oh, we've got a lovely supper waiting for you, Rollo's a great cook.

00:29:58Oh, is there anything he can't do?

00:30:00Can you play the glockenspiel?

00:30:02Ask him.

00:30:03Oh, what's that noise?

00:30:07Foxes.

00:30:07Do you remember the colour of Suzanne's car when we were at the falls that day?

00:30:14I think it was red too.

00:30:17Somebody was looking at me tonight at Vespers.

00:30:19Somebody knew that I knew.

00:30:22Knew what?

00:30:23That the hit and run was no accident.

00:30:25Oh, calm down, Tommy.

00:30:28Damn it.

00:30:30Take your time.

00:30:31Just hold on tighter.

00:30:32I want to go back to the refuge tomorrow.

00:30:35Stay close.

00:30:36I need to understand which one of them.

00:30:38Which one of them?

00:30:41Nothing.

00:30:43Tommy, you're scaring me.

00:30:45Sorry.

00:30:47I don't think this was a good idea, coming back.

00:30:49You haven't had time to recover.

00:30:51You've been sounding so...

00:30:52What?

00:30:53Crazy?

00:30:54Well, irrational.

00:30:56It's how I go about things.

00:30:58Well, this is different.

00:31:12Morning.

00:31:13Morning.

00:31:14Morning.

00:31:15One of our regulars, Thomas.

00:31:17He's a CEO of some concrete company.

00:31:20Comes twice a year and we put him back together again.

00:31:23I think this is his favourite spot.

00:31:25Oh, shall we move?

00:31:26No, no.

00:31:27He can let us have it for an hour.

00:31:30Rollo made the pond and the little waterfall.

00:31:33He calls it his Zen garden.

00:31:34Talented man, your brother.

00:31:36Aye.

00:31:37He's not a Christian?

00:31:38No.

00:31:39What does he believe?

00:31:41Oh, Rollo believes in everything.

00:31:43And nothing.

00:31:44He certainly doesn't believe in a spiritual vocation.

00:31:47At least not my spiritual vocation.

00:31:50How long have you actually lived here?

00:31:52Since I was five.

00:31:54With a few years off to go to college and travel.

00:31:57Peace of mind.

00:31:58Must be a wonderful thing.

00:32:00I guess.

00:32:02It's not something I experience much of these days.

00:32:05Running this place is kind of full on.

00:32:07I can't imagine what it's like for you, Thomas.

00:32:12I'm so sorry.

00:32:14It's confusing.

00:32:16That's the thing.

00:32:17Boundaries kind of blur.

00:32:19It was always a bit like that, though.

00:32:24I'm constantly trying to translate sound and touch back into images.

00:32:29I was asking, Kat, what's that?

00:32:31I'm like a wee kid.

00:32:32And you rely so much on other people.

00:32:37You've been really kind, Aaron, taking me around.

00:32:40That's all right.

00:32:41It's not a chore.

00:32:44You get lonely here?

00:32:46Sometimes.

00:32:48You have a girlfriend?

00:32:49Sorry, am I being too nosy?

00:32:50No.

00:32:51It's just...

00:32:52I'm not sure how it works here, if you're celibate.

00:32:56No.

00:32:57I don't have to be celibate.

00:32:59But no girlfriend.

00:33:02I did go out with this woman, Lucy.

00:33:07I used to enjoy seeing her.

00:33:09And her little kid.

00:33:11My niece, in actual fact.

00:33:14What?

00:33:15You mean she's Rollo's kid?

00:33:17Yes.

00:33:18Rollo went out with Lucy before I did.

00:33:22And then he set me up with her.

00:33:24He likes to fix you, Rollo.

00:33:27Like his clocks and watches.

00:33:31He's back with her now.

00:33:33That must be complicated.

00:33:36He wants me to go and see a doctor, he knows.

00:33:39He's quite difficult to resist.

00:33:42Yes.

00:33:43Kat's obviously very fond of him.

00:33:45And Suzanne, too.

00:33:47Suzanne?

00:33:48I'm not sure about that.

00:33:51I have the sense they're very close.

00:33:54Or have been.

00:33:57Rollo and Suzanne.

00:34:02Hi.

00:34:04Max.

00:34:05You remember Graeme and Sophie?

00:34:06Uh-huh.

00:34:07They live just south of Inverness these days.

00:34:09Oh.

00:34:10They're having a party tonight and they'd like us all to come.

00:34:12Well, we're having dinner at the refuge tonight, Rollo.

00:34:14We could do that any time.

00:34:16We were all quite close at university, Tommy.

00:34:19It'd be a pity to miss them.

00:34:20You two go.

00:34:21I'd like you to meet them, Tommy.

00:34:23I don't feel very social at the moment, Kat.

00:34:26More interesting conversation than you get at the refuge.

00:34:30Anyway.

00:34:31I'll let you two argue the toss.

00:34:32I'll be my workshop, Max.

00:34:33I'd prefer it if you came, Tommy.

00:34:40I don't want to go with just Rollo.

00:34:42Why not?

00:34:43I just don't.

00:34:44I don't want to meet a load of strangers right now, Kat.

00:34:48Go with Rollo.

00:34:49Hey, come here.

00:34:54Give us your hand.

00:34:56On the bed here.

00:34:58Sorry for being so miserable.

00:35:00Don't be daft.

00:35:01Don't be daft.

00:35:03You start getting used to it after ten years, seemingly.

00:35:06That's reassuring.

00:35:08Shh.

00:35:09It's okay.

00:35:09You remember that afternoon in the pub?

00:35:13At the Falls?

00:35:14Mm-hmm.

00:35:15Rollo talked about this guy.

00:35:17This disabled guy you broke up with?

00:35:19He'd no right to talk about Colin.

00:35:22And I would have broken up with him anyway.

00:35:25Why'd you mention it?

00:35:27Well, even before this happened,

00:35:29I don't know, I felt the frustration in you.

00:35:32With me.

00:35:34I just wonder if you're tired of me, Kat.

00:35:36No, Tommy.

00:35:37That's simply not true.

00:35:38We're so different.

00:35:40You're gregarious.

00:35:42You like company, fun.

00:35:44Why should you spend life with me in the shadows?

00:35:47Just be quiet.

00:35:49You're being daft.

00:35:51Am I?

00:35:53We eat in here when we want a bit of privacy.

00:35:55The defectory can get so noisy.

00:35:57More soup?

00:35:59No, thanks, Fraser.

00:36:00Not for me.

00:36:01Are you all right, Thomas?

00:36:03You look a bit flushed.

00:36:05Just a bit feverish, Suzanne.

00:36:06I might miss vespers.

00:36:09I can take you back after the meal, if you like.

00:36:11Thanks, Aaron.

00:36:12Yes.

00:36:13This used to be the dining room for the whole place.

00:36:16When Fraser and Dad started things up.

00:36:18Quite a squeeze.

00:36:20Fifteen guests at the most in those days.

00:36:22And two unruly kids.

00:36:24You missed her mother's influence.

00:36:26You were her mother, Fraser.

00:36:28Dad was the strict one, Thomas.

00:36:30Fraser was a pushover.

00:36:32And what was your dad like, Aaron?

00:36:34My dad had loads of energy.

00:36:36A bit like Rollo in that way.

00:36:38If and no other.

00:36:39Aye, chalk and cheese.

00:36:41But Rollo was his favourite.

00:36:43That's not true.

00:36:44Of course it was, Fraser.

00:36:46Even though they fought like cat and dog.

00:36:50I hope you don't mind me asking, but...

00:36:53Rollo seems to have quite a bit of influence here.

00:36:55And...

00:36:57Well, his views don't quite seem to accord with yours.

00:37:01Not quite, no.

00:37:02Well, the truth is, Thomas, that me and Fraser kind of let things slip.

00:37:10Financially.

00:37:11After Dad died.

00:37:12And...

00:37:13And Rollo bought the place.

00:37:15Yes.

00:37:17Leased it to us at a very generous rent.

00:37:19But with certain strings attached.

00:37:21He's effectively our landlord.

00:37:23Yes, Rollo owns us.

00:37:27Funny, isn't it?

00:37:28How we always end up talking about Rollo.

00:37:32Hi.

00:37:42Hi.

00:37:43You're back early.

00:37:44It's not even ten o'clock.

00:37:46When did you get back?

00:37:48Oh, over an hour ago.

00:37:50I was going to go to Vespers, but I was feeling kind of rough.

00:37:53Oh.

00:37:54Have you got a temperature?

00:37:55Maybe.

00:37:56You all right?

00:37:58Not really.

00:37:59What's wrong?

00:38:01Rollo be.

00:38:02He behaved badly.

00:38:03I insisted we left.

00:38:05What did he do?

00:38:06Oh, I don't want to talk about it just now.

00:38:08I've got a splitting headache.

00:38:10Okay.

00:38:12Oh, you look ill, Tommy.

00:38:13Any night for us both, eh?

00:38:15Hmm.

00:38:15I couldn't sleep.

00:38:17I couldn't sleep.

00:38:18I felt fevered, and Cat was restless.

00:38:21At one point, I thought I heard her crying.

00:38:23Eventually, I drowsed off and woke up to hear voices from downstairs.

00:38:29Cat, you awake?

00:38:34Can you hear it?

00:38:37What?

00:38:38Arguing from downstairs.

00:38:41Go back to sleep, Tommy.

00:38:43Don't tell me anymore what I need to do.

00:38:45I've had enough.

00:38:46What are you going to do with that?

00:38:47Did you hear a smashing noise?

00:38:48I've had enough.

00:38:50No.

00:38:53Can we go down and see if Rollo's okay?

00:38:54He's okay.

00:38:56Carpooling away.

00:38:58I'm worried about him.

00:38:59Oh, you're ill, Tommy.

00:39:01Do you understand?

00:39:02You've had a terrible shock, and it's made you...

00:39:05What?

00:39:06Paranoid?

00:39:06Oh, you shouldn't have come up here.

00:39:08I'm not paranoid.

00:39:09It's unsettled, everything.

00:39:11The accident, it's bound to have done.

00:39:13Try and get some sleep, eh?

00:39:18Eventually, I did fall into a troubled sleep.

00:39:22One of them can finish me off from Bishop, the Knight, or the Queen.

00:39:25Funny, isn't it?

00:39:27How we always end up talking about Rollo.

00:39:30He likes to fix you, Rollo.

00:39:33Like his clocks and watches.

00:39:35Beware me, Rollo Thomas.

00:39:37Hmm?

00:39:38He collects people.

00:39:39Rollo, Rollo!

00:39:40Ow!

00:39:43Cat.

00:39:44What?

00:39:45Cat, wake up.

00:39:46What is it?

00:39:47Rollo, I'm worried about Rollo.

00:39:49Oh.

00:39:50What's the time?

00:39:52It's almost midnight.

00:39:53Cat, please, we need to find Rollo.

00:39:56Oh, you're fevered, darling.

00:39:58Please.

00:39:59You're not well.

00:40:01Cat.

00:40:03Okay, okay, I'll go and see if he's away.

00:40:06No, I want to come with you.

00:40:07Oh.

00:40:07We tried his room, went through the cottage, but he wasn't there.

00:40:14I remember hanging onto Cat's arm as if she was my only certainty.

00:40:18She was afraid, alarmed.

00:40:20I think more for my sake than Rollo's.

00:40:22But when I suggested we try Rollo's workshop, she didn't object.

00:40:26Rollo!

00:40:29Rollo!

00:40:30Rollo!

00:40:32Where's the light?

00:40:34It was on a cord.

00:40:37Oh.

00:40:39He's not here, Tommy.

00:40:41Oh, Cat.

00:40:42What?

00:40:43Well, let's get you back to bed.

00:40:44You're shivering.

00:40:46Oh, Cat.

00:40:47Come on, Tommy, you are.

00:40:49You're fevered.

00:40:50Your head's burning.

00:40:51Rollo!

00:40:52Tommy!

00:40:54He's gone.

00:40:56What?

00:40:56I think he's dead.

00:40:58Tommy, this is nonsense.

00:41:00I think he's dead, Cat.

00:41:01In part one of the sensitive Heart of Darkness by Alistair Jessamine,

00:41:21Thomas Souter was played by Robin Lane,

00:41:24Cat Logan by Julie Duncanson,

00:41:27Rollo Caldwell, Stephen Duffy,

00:41:29Aaron Caldwell, Sean Biggerstaff,

00:41:34Fraser MacKinnon, Sean Scanlon,

00:41:37and Suzanne Glenn by Molly Innes.

00:41:40Other parts were played by the cast.

00:41:43The sensitive Heart of Darkness was a BBC Scotland production

00:41:46directed in Glasgow by Bruce Young.

00:41:48He's gone.

00:42:01What?

00:42:02I think he's dead.

00:42:03Tommy, this is nonsense.

00:42:06I think he's dead, Cat.

00:42:07The sensitive Heart of Darkness by Alistair Jessamine

00:42:19Part Two

00:42:21When I think about the refuge now,

00:42:29it's the sounds I remember.

00:42:32The peeling of the monastery bell,

00:42:34the groaning of the trees on the night of the storm,

00:42:37and Rollo's voice.

00:42:40The Bishop, the Knight, or the Queen.

00:42:44Cat and I had been staying with a friend, Rollo Caldwell,

00:42:48who had a cottage in the grounds of The Refuge,

00:42:51a monastery and therapy centre in the Highlands.

00:42:54Six months before,

00:42:55I'd been blinded after being hit by a car,

00:42:58a hit and run that I suspected

00:43:00was a deliberate attempt on Rollo's life.

00:43:02And now, Rollo hadn't come home for two nights,

00:43:05and I was worried.

00:43:08Worried enough to phone the police.

00:43:11And he was meant to go to London when?

00:43:12Tonight.

00:43:14Inspector Slater, I think something's happened to him.

00:43:16Yeah, I appreciate your concern, sir.

00:43:19Is it possible that Mr Caldwell just left a couple of days early?

00:43:22It's the most likely explanation, Tommy.

00:43:24Then why didn't he say goodbye?

00:43:26Because he was in a filthy mood with me.

00:43:28You can't tell the inspector about the text.

00:43:31Rollo and I were at a party.

00:43:33He got a text on the way home.

00:43:35Must see you.

00:43:36Chapel.

00:43:36Midnight.

00:43:37Who was it from?

00:43:38He didn't say.

00:43:39It annoyed him, whoever it was.

00:43:42Midnight.

00:43:44And you said you heard an argument, sir.

00:43:46When was that?

00:43:47About eleven.

00:43:48Then I heard a door slam and a car pull away.

00:43:51Just before midnight, I asked Cat to take me round the house to look for Rollo.

00:43:55I was very uneasy.

00:43:58Most likely.

00:43:59Somebody's already tried to kill him.

00:44:02Sorry?

00:44:02The accident that blinded me.

00:44:04The hit and run.

00:44:05If I hadn't pushed him out of the way, he'd have been killed.

00:44:08You think it was a deliberate attempt on his life?

00:44:11Yes.

00:44:12How can you be so sure, sir?

00:44:13I'm psychic.

00:44:18Uh-huh.

00:44:21Thomas has actually done quite a bit of work for the police.

00:44:24I have a liaison officer who'd vouch for me.

00:44:26I can give you his details.

00:44:29Right.

00:44:29That sounded so lame.

00:44:34I'm psychic.

00:44:36I think he was right about Rollo.

00:44:39He just took the hump.

00:44:40Went off early.

00:44:42Why was Rollo so annoyed with you?

00:44:44He doesn't like to hear home truths.

00:44:47I told him how obnoxious he was.

00:44:49Coming on to everyone at the party like that.

00:44:51Boasting about his girlfriend.

00:44:53Lucy?

00:44:53Yeah.

00:44:56Maybe we should start packing.

00:44:57I don't want to be here when he gets back.

00:44:59I'd like to stay.

00:45:00Stay?

00:45:02I need to get back to Glasgow.

00:45:03I know.

00:45:04Look, I'll ask if I can move into the retreat centre.

00:45:07Don't be daft, Tommy.

00:45:08How would you get around?

00:45:10I need to know what's happened to Rollo.

00:45:13Nothing's happened to Rollo.

00:45:17Tommy?

00:45:18What?

00:45:19Rollo's pocket watch.

00:45:21Next to the wood burner here.

00:45:23It's smashed.

00:45:24The casing's all dented.

00:45:25What time does it say?

00:45:28Oh, the hands are twisted.

00:45:3011.15.

00:45:33He was never without his watch.

00:45:36That night, I put Rollo's shattered pocket watch under my pillow.

00:45:42I need to understand which one of them.

00:45:45The Holy Trinity.

00:45:47Lisa.

00:45:48Adam.

00:45:48Suzanne.

00:45:49One of them can finish me off.

00:45:52The Bishop.

00:45:52The Knight.

00:45:53Or the Queen.

00:45:53I don't like leaving you.

00:46:02I'm not convinced people here at the refuge are going to give you enough help.

00:46:05Aaron's on one side.

00:46:06Fraser's on the other.

00:46:07I can call them any time.

00:46:09I'll be fine.

00:46:10There's hardly any room for your clothes.

00:46:13It's like a prison cell.

00:46:14I'm always kind of fancy being a monk.

00:46:18Aye.

00:46:18Well, you may want to know that Jesus is staring at you from the opposite wall.

00:46:22And he doesn't look too happy.

00:46:24Kat, when you came back on Saturday night, you were really shaken.

00:46:29Did Rollo make a pass at you?

00:46:31No.

00:46:32It was more...

00:46:34He said that you and I were incompatible.

00:46:39That I should leave you.

00:46:41It just really infuriated me.

00:46:43Maybe you had a point.

00:46:44Tommy.

00:46:45Who wants to be shackled to a blind man?

00:46:48Tommy.

00:46:49Sorry.

00:46:50I just came out.

00:46:52I'd better get going.

00:46:53Kat, come here.

00:46:54I'm sorry.

00:46:59This mattress is like a plank.

00:47:08You can call me any time, Thomas.

00:47:11If I'm busy, I'll get someone else.

00:47:12Thanks, Alan.

00:47:14Okay, Duncan, that's you.

00:47:17If you could just take the trays and chopping boards into the pot room.

00:47:20Sure.

00:47:22Can I do anything?

00:47:24You could stir the lentils for me.

00:47:26Up you get.

00:47:30That's it.

00:47:31Spoon here.

00:47:33Handle here.

00:47:34So did you just fancy a change of scene?

00:47:39Yes.

00:47:40Bit of peace and quiet.

00:47:41Kat seemed a bit concerned.

00:47:43Said you had hospital appointments.

00:47:45I can wait.

00:47:47Right.

00:47:49I'm getting worried about Rollo.

00:47:52He missed our AGM last night.

00:47:54He's taken off before, but not like this.

00:47:56I phoned our cousin in London again.

00:47:59Not there.

00:48:00Not at Lucy's either.

00:48:02His girlfriend?

00:48:03Hmm.

00:48:04The woman you were going out with for a while.

00:48:07How do you know that?

00:48:09You told me.

00:48:10In the garden that day?

00:48:13It's odd he missed a meeting.

00:48:15Given that the knives were going to come out.

00:48:17How do you mean?

00:48:19Fraser.

00:48:19Rolo wanted us to talk about removing Fraser as a leader.

00:48:24Keep that to yourself, Thomas.

00:48:26Hmm.

00:48:27Yes.

00:48:28He likes to have his say, does Rolo.

00:48:36God be in my head.

00:48:38And in my understanding.

00:48:39God be in mine eyes.

00:48:41And in my looking.

00:48:42God be in my mouth.

00:48:44And in my speaking.

00:48:45God be in my heart.

00:48:46And in my thinking.

00:48:48God be at mine end.

00:48:50And in my departing.

00:48:53As the days passed and Rolo didn't appear,

00:48:56the atmosphere at the refuge became more and more sober and fearful.

00:49:01I began to sit on in the chapel after morning prayers,

00:49:04trying to organise the information,

00:49:07the chaos of thoughts, images and memories

00:49:10that was threatening to engulf my mind.

00:49:15Who wants to be shackled to a blind man?

00:49:17The information.

00:49:19Why can't you just turn your back on it?

00:49:21I just wonder if you're tired of me, Karen.

00:49:25Must see you, Chapel Midnight.

00:49:29Tommy!

00:49:32Sorry to disturb you, sir.

00:49:34Who's that?

00:49:36Inspector Slater.

00:49:37Oh, it's all right, Inspector.

00:49:38Come in.

00:49:39Can I park myself here?

00:49:44Oh, yeah, of course.

00:49:47So,

00:49:48we've started to get a wee bit concerned about Mr. Caldwell.

00:49:54I've just been chatting to some of your colleagues in the refectory.

00:49:58You might like to know what the cleaning lady told me

00:50:01that the floor in the chapel here had already been mopped

00:50:03when she came in on the Sunday morning.

00:50:05And there were some shards of glass on the floor.

00:50:09And what she presumed were wine stains on the altar cloth.

00:50:13Rouleau's text.

00:50:15The one he got on the Saturday night.

00:50:17Must see you.

00:50:18Chapel.

00:50:18Midnight.

00:50:19Aye.

00:50:21Unfortunately, she washed the cloth.

00:50:23We cleared up all the glass,

00:50:24and the bin men came on the Monday,

00:50:25but I thought I'd take a wee shifty.

00:50:29I'll leave you in peace.

00:50:32Come back later.

00:50:34Maybe you and I can have a wee chat this afternoon.

00:50:37Sure.

00:50:39You still think someone was out to kill Mr. Caldwell?

00:50:42Yes, I do.

00:50:44Before I forget, Fraser,

00:50:46your copy of AGM Minutes.

00:50:48All of this, Suzanne.

00:50:50Oh.

00:50:52What's wrong, Thomas?

00:50:53Uh, just a bit of gristle.

00:50:55Oh, dear.

00:50:56Oh, Thomas,

00:50:59Mr. Slater would like to see you at three in the library.

00:51:02Right.

00:51:03Mr. Slater in the library,

00:51:05with the lead piping.

00:51:07I'm sorry.

00:51:10Everything okay for you?

00:51:11Apart from the food.

00:51:13Fine.

00:51:13Thanks, Suzanne.

00:51:14Aaron's been great.

00:51:15Better than a guide dog.

00:51:17Perhaps you'd like to come over for dinner sometime.

00:51:20My husband's a very good cook.

00:51:22I'd like that.

00:51:24Suzanne,

00:51:24sorry to bother you,

00:51:26but Deidre Allo would like a word.

00:51:28What now?

00:51:29She's very unhappy about that last therapy session.

00:51:34Excuse me.

00:51:37Sorry, Thomas,

00:51:38you don't find us at our best at the moment.

00:51:40I'm going to stop eating this.

00:51:43Suzanne can be a bit overzealous with the minutes.

00:51:47Did I go okay?

00:51:48You're a GM.

00:51:49A bit of an anticlimax.

00:51:50Rollo was all set to change things big time.

00:51:54He was actually very keen that I should stand down.

00:51:57So was he on your council?

00:51:58No.

00:51:59He wanted to be there as financial advisor,

00:52:01landlord,

00:52:03and, well,

00:52:03interested party.

00:52:05Anyway,

00:52:06nothing much happened in the event.

00:52:08More water.

00:52:09Thanks.

00:52:09The fact is,

00:52:14Thomas,

00:52:15I've been going through a tricky period.

00:52:17You might call it a crisis of faith.

00:52:19Oh,

00:52:20I'm sure it'll pass,

00:52:21but it does rather undermine one's ability to lead.

00:52:25Difficult.

00:52:27You know,

00:52:27one gets through these things with a bit of patience.

00:52:30And the right support.

00:52:32You must have had quite a few discussions with Rollo

00:52:35about religion.

00:52:36More like one never-ending discussion.

00:52:38Hmm.

00:52:39I remember during your chess match,

00:52:41he was going at it, rather.

00:52:43Rollo is an iconoclast.

00:52:45He likes to destroy.

00:52:47He's not so good at creating anything positive out of the rubble.

00:52:51I do apologise for that disgusting meal.

00:52:55Can I ask why you decided to stay on here, sir?

00:52:58To find out what happened to Rollo.

00:53:01I phoned your liaison officer, by the way.

00:53:04Seems you've had quite a history with us.

00:53:07Uh-huh.

00:53:07Yeah.

00:53:08You said that missing persons was your thing.

00:53:13Look,

00:53:14what I'm about to say shouldn't go any further.

00:53:18About 2 a.m. on the night Mr Caldwell disappeared,

00:53:21a young lady was driving into the beach car park in Blackwater,

00:53:24with her boyfriend,

00:53:25and saw a man dragging another man out of the car.

00:53:30She was wanting a bit of privacy, so they just drove off again.

00:53:34At first, she assumed that the guy being dragged out was drunk,

00:53:39but she started to feel uneasy.

00:53:43So she gave us a ring.

00:53:44Did she remember what kind of car it was?

00:53:47Just that it was red.

00:53:49The refuge car's red.

00:53:52Yes, it is.

00:53:53Suzanne Glenn's car's red.

00:53:55The car that hit me was red.

00:53:57Are you planning to stay up here for a while, sir?

00:54:00As long as it takes.

00:54:02Well, I can't stop you.

00:54:04Perhaps I'll give you my mobile number.

00:54:08Please don't hesitate to ring if anything turns up, will you?

00:54:12It was an odd meeting, Cat.

00:54:17I don't think you knew what to do with me.

00:54:19Swear me in as a deputy or send me home.

00:54:23How long has Rola been missing now?

00:54:25Fortnight.

00:54:27You OK?

00:54:30I was sick all day.

00:54:31Oh.

00:54:32It feels like something I ate.

00:54:34Oh, no.

00:54:37How are you?

00:54:38Oh, if I could just sleep.

00:54:39My mind's gone into hyperdrive.

00:54:43When I do get to sleep, I have these intense, vivid dreams.

00:54:47Far more vivid than when I could see.

00:54:50What kind of dreams?

00:54:52There's one...

00:54:54This little boy and girl...

00:54:56Crying.

00:54:57Running towards me.

00:55:00If I could just understand what they wanted.

00:55:04The dream's something to do with you.

00:55:09More coffee, Thomas?

00:55:24Lovely meal, David.

00:55:25Oh, thanks.

00:55:26I heard the refuge's cooking's a bit under par.

00:55:29Oh, that stew.

00:55:32I'll need to look on her mum in a bit.

00:55:33Then I'll take you home, Thomas.

00:55:36Poor man.

00:55:36I almost put the car in a ditch a couple of times on the way here.

00:55:40Is it new?

00:55:41Yes.

00:55:42Still getting used to it.

00:55:44Our old car was stolen.

00:55:45Oh, when was that?

00:55:46A while ago.

00:55:49Suzanne was saying you're an artist, David?

00:55:51Was.

00:55:52Still are.

00:55:53Haven't finished a painting for ages.

00:55:55I have mental health problems.

00:55:58The polite phrase.

00:56:00If I hadn't been for Suzanne here, I don't know what I'd have done.

00:56:04I don't know how she manages.

00:56:05Full-time job looking after me and her mum.

00:56:07You sound like Rollo.

00:56:09Rollo?

00:56:10He calls me a perfect saint.

00:56:12With that sneer of his.

00:56:14I mean it.

00:56:15You're a good person.

00:56:17You're a good person, Suzanne.

00:56:20So, I hear you had the police round at the refuge.

00:56:23That's right.

00:56:24Suzanne was saying you've done some work with the police.

00:56:26Yeah.

00:56:27What does that involve?

00:56:28Oh, mainly helping with missing persons.

00:56:31So you're helping them look for Rollo?

00:56:33David.

00:56:34What?

00:56:34Thomas doesn't want to be bothered with this.

00:56:36It's okay.

00:56:37I'm doing what I can.

00:56:39And what's that?

00:56:40What's the process?

00:56:41It's difficult to explain.

00:56:43It's a lot to do with intuition.

00:56:46So what does your intuition say happen to Rollo?

00:56:48I don't know.

00:56:49I'll tell you what my intuition says.

00:56:51He's lying on some beach.

00:56:53Doing what he's always doing, even when he's not here.

00:56:56Being the centre of attention.

00:56:58Would you please just change the subject, David?

00:57:00Well, it's true.

00:57:02I mean, you'll make excuses for him.

00:57:04He chucks this criticism at you all, undermines your confidence when you're not the problem.

00:57:09He's the problem, Suzanne.

00:57:12You can tell the inspector from me, Thomas.

00:57:15Rollo's on a beach somewhere.

00:57:18Rollo's fine.

00:57:18I'm sorry about David's rant.

00:57:24He's not usually like that.

00:57:25It's okay.

00:57:27Rollo seems to provoke extreme reactions.

00:57:30I was very keen to give advice.

00:57:33It's not always that appropriate.

00:57:35If he just left it at that.

00:57:38I mean, the way he goes on at Fraser.

00:57:40Fraser's a good man, with a simple faith.

00:57:43Rollo can't see the virtue in that.

00:57:44But this refrain of his, I want to see your more human side, I mean, as if we're all out

00:57:50of touch with our humanity.

00:57:52And Rollo's the one to show us how to live.

00:57:55Pushing his brother into that totally inappropriate relationship.

00:57:58Lucy.

00:57:59Lucy.

00:58:00Rollo had a child by him.

00:58:02Yes.

00:58:03Persuaded Aaron to take up with her.

00:58:05And then when it suited him, Rollo started seeing her again.

00:58:08Utterly irresponsible.

00:58:09And did he try and bring out your more human side, is that?

00:58:17I'm going to have to pull into this lay-by.

00:58:28What do you think's happened to him?

00:58:29I don't know.

00:58:31What if he's killed himself?

00:58:33Why would he do that?

00:58:36I don't know.

00:58:37Well, I don't know.

00:58:39Oh, God.

00:58:42You know, don't you?

00:58:44Know what, Susan?

00:58:46That I was having an affair with him.

00:58:49Wasn't that what you were meaning?

00:58:51When you asked if he'd brought out my...

00:58:54My human side.

00:58:56I'm sorry.

00:58:57Sorry, there's some hankies in the glove compartment.

00:59:03When Rollo went back to Lucy, I was devastated to be so upset at that.

00:59:14So attached to him.

00:59:15And now, where is he?

00:59:18I'm scared.

00:59:21Did David know about you and Rollo?

00:59:23Yes.

00:59:26He wouldn't have been so upset if it had been anybody else, but he's got no time for Rollo.

00:59:33I'm sorry.

00:59:37I'm very sorry.

00:59:38It's okay.

00:59:39Let's get you home, shall we?

00:59:45Sleepless nights.

00:59:53Images of intense colour, but sliding, slipping away, losing form.

00:59:59Feelings of panic when I can't recall the image of a specific place or face.

01:00:04Always listening, clinging to sounds, as if clinging to sanity itself.

01:00:16Who's here?

01:00:17Hello?

01:00:19Oh, sorry.

01:00:21Sorry to wake you.

01:00:24Thought you might still be up.

01:00:27What's wrong, Frieza?

01:00:29Can I just sit down a minute?

01:00:32Put the light on.

01:00:34No, no, no.

01:00:34I'm fine, ma'am.

01:00:39Rollo used to be afraid of the dark.

01:00:42He was always a frightened boy, despite the bravado.

01:00:47Losing his mum when he was only 13 didn't help.

01:00:51Had to sleep with the light on.

01:00:55I remember you said once that you don't have any religious beliefs.

01:01:00Not really.

01:01:02So what sustains you, Thomas?

01:01:04Especially after what happened.

01:01:07That's difficult.

01:01:11Aye.

01:01:12Without belief in something higher, the world really is a very dark place.

01:01:17Sir, if you don't have any religious beliefs, what are you doing here?

01:01:23I like it here.

01:01:25Do you?

01:01:27I'm not a fool, Thomas.

01:01:29Well, not a complete fool.

01:01:32What colour is your car?

01:01:35How did your meeting go?

01:01:37You're here to pry.

01:01:40You think he's dead, don't you?

01:01:43I don't know.

01:01:45Just tell me, do you think he's dead?

01:01:47Yes.

01:01:50So do I.

01:01:52It's strange.

01:01:53I always had this feeling I might outlive him.

01:01:57Something about him.

01:01:58Go under the umbrella a bit more, Thomas.

01:02:04You're getting wet.

01:02:06Take a shortcut over this field, I think.

01:02:08Whoops.

01:02:09Careful.

01:02:10Sorry.

01:02:11Tired.

01:02:12Hang on to my arm a bit tighter.

01:02:14He's still not sleeping.

01:02:15No.

01:02:16Fraser's wee visit wouldn't have helped.

01:02:20He'd been drinking, actually.

01:02:22Had he?

01:02:23Well, I'm afraid Fraser has a problem.

01:02:27He goes to AA meetings now, which is progress.

01:02:29I remember Rolo once asking Fraser if he wanted a drink,

01:02:33and Fraser flying off the handle.

01:02:35I used to hero-worship my brother.

01:02:37But over the years I've come to see his darker side.

01:02:40What do you mean?

01:02:42There's a word for someone like Rolo.

01:02:44What's that?

01:02:45Sadist.

01:02:46Let's just shelter under this tree for a bit.

01:02:56You can see Lucy's cottage from here.

01:03:01Used to be my surrogate family, Lucy and Wendy.

01:03:04Before Rolo muscled in again.

01:03:08You know, sometimes I felt he just couldn't cope with me being happy.

01:03:11I can see Lucy through the kitchen window.

01:03:17She'll be cooking lunch.

01:03:19When did you last see her?

01:03:21The night Rolo disappeared.

01:03:23First time I'd seen Lucy for ages.

01:03:26I just went round after I dropped you off.

01:03:28We got on great.

01:03:31And then Rolo has to turn up.

01:03:33Drunk.

01:03:34What time is this?

01:03:36Ten-ish.

01:03:37You got Wendy out of bed.

01:03:40Of course, she got totally overexcited.

01:03:42Yeah, well, Rolo's an exciting dad to have when he's around.

01:03:45I finally persuaded him to let me drive him home.

01:03:50It was the last I saw of him.

01:03:52And when did you drop Rolo off?

01:03:55Is it important?

01:03:56It might be.

01:03:57I can't remember.

01:03:59I was back at the refuge about midnight.

01:04:02I heard someone arguing with Rolo that night.

01:04:06It wasn't you, was it?

01:04:08Not me.

01:04:11Shall we go?

01:04:16There's a storm brewing.

01:04:18I can hear it.

01:04:20Can you come up sometime soon, Kat?

01:04:22I'm so busy, Tommy.

01:04:24Something's going to break.

01:04:27What do you mean?

01:04:27Something big is about to happen.

01:04:30To you?

01:04:31I don't know.

01:04:33Tommy, I just don't know how to respond when you say things like this.

01:04:38I'm afraid I'm going mad, Kat.

01:04:41Well, you're not, are you?

01:04:43I just can't deal with it.

01:04:44The blindness.

01:04:46Everything.

01:04:48You should be at home.

01:04:50Look, I'll come up.

01:04:51Give me a couple of days.

01:04:52Oh, thank you.

01:04:53But I'm taking you home, Tommy.

01:04:57That night, there was a terrible storm.

01:05:00I couldn't sleep.

01:05:02A confusion of mental images.

01:05:05Rolo's face.

01:05:07Two little children walking towards me.

01:05:10The crucified Christ on the altarpiece.

01:05:12Then voices, sounds, growing in intensity, until I thought my mind would split in two.

01:05:22Tommy!

01:05:27Tommy.

01:05:28I didn't know if the voice came from inside my head or outside.

01:05:36Inside the room or outside.

01:05:39Tommy.

01:05:42Rolo?

01:05:43Is that you?

01:05:44I used to see the elves round here.

01:05:49Used to follow you home at twilight.

01:05:52Rolo?

01:05:54Follow.

01:05:58I got up.

01:06:00I didn't even put slippers on or a coat.

01:06:03Didn't think of waking up Aaron.

01:06:05Just blundered out into the storm as if I was in a dream.

01:06:11Or a nightmare.

01:06:13Following Rolo's voice.

01:06:15Tommy.

01:06:16Where are you?

01:06:19Follow.

01:06:21What do you want?

01:06:23Follow you home.

01:06:26Stumbling.

01:06:28Slipping.

01:06:29Heart crashing against my chest.

01:06:31Hearing the groaning of the trees as I came closer to the wood.

01:06:37Then I fell over a body.

01:06:42Rolo?

01:06:45Rolo, is that you?

01:06:48I stretched out a hand and touched sodden hair.

01:06:52A cheek stubble.

01:06:55And then the sense of a light.

01:06:57And a woman's voice.

01:06:59David!

01:07:02David!

01:07:03Over here.

01:07:05David!

01:07:06Over here.

01:07:08Who's that?

01:07:09Suzanne?

01:07:10It's Thomas here.

01:07:11I'm here.

01:07:13Thomas?

01:07:15Oh my God.

01:07:17Who is it, Suzanne?

01:07:18Is it David?

01:07:19Yes.

01:07:20Oh God.

01:07:22Is he dead?

01:07:23I can feel a pulse.

01:07:24Yeah?

01:07:25Yeah?

01:07:33Cup of tea, Thomas?

01:07:34Hmm.

01:07:35Thanks, Fraser.

01:07:37Just in the bedside table.

01:07:40What's the time?

01:07:41That's the lunch bell.

01:07:43Want any lunch?

01:07:45A bit later, maybe.

01:07:47Hmm.

01:07:47You've slept for over twelve hours.

01:07:51David?

01:07:53Oh, he's going to be all right.

01:07:55You and Suzanne found him in the nick of time.

01:07:58It was a pretty large overdose.

01:08:00How are you feeling?

01:08:02A bit wrecked.

01:08:05How did you know he was there, Thomas?

01:08:08I heard Roller's voice calling to me.

01:08:11Roller's voice?

01:08:12Yeah.

01:08:12It felt very real.

01:08:16I just followed his voice.

01:08:18Well, I'll let you come too.

01:08:23David was asked to see you.

01:08:25To see me?

01:08:26Yes, I could drive you to the hospital tonight, if you're up to it.

01:08:30Yeah, thanks.

01:08:31Poor Suzanne.

01:08:33How is she?

01:08:35Very distressed.

01:08:37By the way, I'd like to apologize for my behavior a couple of nights ago.

01:08:41That's okay.

01:08:43Yes.

01:08:44Well, I'll let you surface.

01:08:47Thanks for the tea.

01:08:52The storm's rather devastated Roller's garden.

01:08:56Has it?

01:08:57Yeah, shame.

01:08:59When's Cat coming up?

01:09:01Tomorrow.

01:09:02Are you feeling any better?

01:09:04I'm feeling washed out.

01:09:08A bit kind of washed clean.

01:09:11That's strange, Alan.

01:09:12Remember I once told you how I try and translate everything back into images?

01:09:18Yes.

01:09:19That's gone.

01:09:21This afternoon there's just the sounds, the smells.

01:09:24I have something to show you.

01:09:34Roller's watch.

01:09:37Where did you find it?

01:09:38In the cottage, the morning after he disappeared.

01:09:40Smashing this watch.

01:09:42I don't think there's anything I could have done that would have hurt him more.

01:09:50It's meant a hell of a lot to him.

01:09:51It was you arguing with him that night, wasn't it?

01:09:59Yes.

01:10:00I don't know why I couldn't tell you.

01:10:03I felt so ashamed, I guess.

01:10:07And I wonder if somehow it drove Roller to do something stupid.

01:10:13I just laid it on him when we got back from Lucy's.

01:10:19A huge catalogue of home truths.

01:10:22His cruelty, his self-righteousness.

01:10:25How did he take it?

01:10:26Well, he wasn't having it.

01:10:27But then I grabbed the watch, smashed it with my heel, and he collapsed.

01:10:34He just sat there, crying and crying.

01:10:38I can't imagine Roller crying.

01:10:42I just left him to it.

01:10:45Drove away.

01:10:51It torments me to think that that might be the last time we ever see each other.

01:10:57Thanks for coming, Thomas.

01:11:01How are you, David?

01:11:03Well, when I came round, I was disappointed.

01:11:06I must say, to still be here.

01:11:11I left a note for Suzanne.

01:11:14I sent a confession to Slater.

01:11:17I wanted to tell you face to face before everyone else finds out.

01:11:23I could tell that you suspected me.

01:11:25The new car?

01:11:26Yes.

01:11:28Yes, I torched the old one.

01:11:31Reported it missing.

01:11:33Well, there was an awful lot of blood, you see.

01:11:37You drove the body from the chapel to the beach?

01:11:40Yes.

01:11:41And how did you get rid of the body?

01:11:43Well, I have a boat.

01:11:45Moored nearby.

01:11:48We'd rather come out in the end.

01:11:50I'm a lousy liar.

01:11:52I mean, nothing much can be proved without a body, of course, but I'm...

01:11:58I'm tired.

01:12:00I mean, why shouldn't Suzanne take a lover?

01:12:05What could I offer her?

01:12:07But at least I treated her well.

01:12:09It was the way Rollo treated her, the way he treated everyone.

01:12:12I didn't mean to kill him, just to confront him.

01:12:18While we were talking, I just suddenly went crazy.

01:12:24Smashed a glass candlestick and cut his throat.

01:12:26And the hit and run?

01:12:28Spur of the moment.

01:12:31I just saw Rollo walking down the lane and went for him.

01:12:35Another reason I wanted to see you...

01:12:38Well, to apologise.

01:12:44Apologise.

01:12:46Won't bring your sight back, will it?

01:12:48You almost stopped, didn't you, David?

01:12:52Cat said the car came to a halt up the road.

01:12:55Yes.

01:12:57Yeah, I almost got out when I saw I'd hit the wrong man.

01:13:05I worry for Suzanne.

01:13:08For her state of mind.

01:13:11She's not as strong as she makes it.

01:13:14You understand?

01:13:18You were right all along.

01:13:20Oh, God, Tommy.

01:13:21I was very fond of Rollo, despite everything.

01:13:24I'm so sorry, Cat.

01:13:26The others all know?

01:13:27Slater met with the community this morning.

01:13:30It's horrible.

01:13:31Oh, hey.

01:13:35It's a soft hand.

01:13:38It touches so much finer now.

01:13:42Something's changed anew.

01:13:44Now it's all over, I suppose.

01:13:46It's not over yet, Cat.

01:13:48How do you mean?

01:13:50There's something I need to do.

01:13:52You remember you bought some postcards of Blackwater Falls, the day of the hit and run?

01:13:56Yeah.

01:13:57I think I've still got one in my bag.

01:13:58Can I have it?

01:13:59Sure.

01:14:01You're not going to tell me why, though?

01:14:02Not yet.

01:14:05Oh.

01:14:06I want to go home, Tommy.

01:14:07I want to leave here and never come back.

01:14:10The information's gone.

01:14:16What do you mean?

01:14:18Just that.

01:14:19Since the storm.

01:14:21No voices.

01:14:22Sounds.

01:14:23Nothing.

01:14:23It's like I've had tinnitus all my life, and suddenly it isn't there.

01:14:30Temporary, I suppose.

01:14:32How does it make you feel?

01:14:34Weird.

01:14:34I've got something to tell you, Tommy.

01:14:42You know how I've been feeling under the weather for a while?

01:14:46For what?

01:14:46Well, I'm pregnant.

01:15:11So we can come forward now, when we're ready, and light a candle.

01:15:17Remembering, as we do so, a friend, a colleague, a godson, a brother.

01:15:30After the service, I just sat there in the chapel, thinking of Rolo.

01:15:36Thinking of the three people closest to Rolo.

01:15:40Aaron, Fraser, Suzanne.

01:15:43As one by one, the community left.

01:15:48Eventually leaving me alone.

01:15:51With one other.

01:15:54Suzanne?

01:15:55Yes.

01:15:56Fraser gave me your card this afternoon.

01:15:59I was intrigued by your message.

01:16:01Must see you, chapel, midnight.

01:16:03Rolo got a text the night he died, saying the same thing.

01:16:07Did he?

01:16:07David confessed to me, in the hospital, that he was the hit-and-run driver.

01:16:14And that he'd killed Rolo in the chapel here.

01:16:18I don't think he was sure if I believed him.

01:16:20Did you believe him?

01:16:23No.

01:16:26I told David that Cat had seen the car stop after it hit me.

01:16:30And David said, yes, he'd almost got out when he saw he'd hit the wrong man.

01:16:35But the car didn't stop.

01:16:38I lied to him.

01:16:40He wasn't driving the car that afternoon.

01:16:43And he didn't kill Rolo.

01:16:45Then who did?

01:16:48David told me how worried he was about you.

01:16:50How fragile you were.

01:16:52It was almost as if he was warning me off.

01:16:57I don't know what you mean.

01:16:58I think you do.

01:16:58A perfect saint.

01:17:04It's strange how certain roles can be suffocating.

01:17:13Rolo showed me the way out.

01:17:15But he unleashed something that even he couldn't control.

01:17:21None of it was planned.

01:17:23The hit-and-run.

01:17:25And that night in the chapel.

01:17:27I just wanted to talk.

01:17:36You deigned to come.

01:17:38I'm tired, Suzanne.

01:17:40What do you want?

01:17:41I want you to leave Lucy.

01:17:43It's over between you and me.

01:17:45You just have to accept that.

01:17:48You think you can play with people's lives like this?

01:17:50I've had this rubbish all evening.

01:17:53Please.

01:17:55Rolo.

01:17:55The trouble with you is...

01:17:57Oh, the trouble with me.

01:17:59It's always the trouble with me.

01:18:01Oh, bad girl.

01:18:04That was an expensive candlestick.

01:18:06Fraser will not be pleased.

01:18:09You look ridiculous.

01:18:10Oh, I severed an artery.

01:18:20Oh, the absolute horror of that evening, Thomas.

01:18:24And you phoned David?

01:18:25Yes.

01:18:27He took care of it all.

01:18:28Washed the floor, got rid of the body.

01:18:31He got me to burn my dress, my shoes, everything.

01:18:33In the end, he couldn't live with it.

01:18:39What should I do?

01:18:41Mother?

01:18:42My work?

01:18:44David must want to take the blame.

01:18:47An act of love.

01:18:49And could you live with that?

01:18:52No.

01:18:53You're right.

01:18:53I think I...

01:18:56I think I should make a phone call or two.

01:19:01Do the right thing.

01:19:05Let me take you back to your room.

01:19:08Give me your hand.

01:19:11I did this to you.

01:19:13Yes.

01:19:14Do you think you could forgive me?

01:19:18In time?

01:19:21In time?

01:19:24I'm terrified, Thomas.

01:19:27Of going mad.

01:19:30The enormity of what I've done.

01:19:31Goodbye, Fraser.

01:19:47And thank you.

01:19:49Goodbye, Thomas.

01:19:50I'm not sure how the refuge is going to continue.

01:19:53I won't be carrying on, that's for sure.

01:19:56Perhaps our arm can rise to the challenge.

01:19:58Yeah.

01:19:58Suzanne was the pillar of the place in many ways.

01:20:04It all just beggars belief.

01:20:07Just these suitcases and that's us.

01:20:09Oh, let me give you a hand, Cat.

01:20:10Oh, thanks.

01:20:11Just be a tick, Tommy.

01:20:13Sure.

01:20:17Thomas, you're off.

01:20:19Oh, I couldn't find you, um...

01:20:21I went for a bit of a hike.

01:20:23Come and sit beside me.

01:20:28I remember sitting on this bench with Rolo.

01:20:32How many years ago now?

01:20:35Put your hand on the arm, Thomas.

01:20:37What do you feel?

01:20:41Grooves.

01:20:42It's been defaced or something.

01:20:44We were waiting for the car to take us to Mum's funeral.

01:20:48Rolo sat here.

01:20:50Handsome in his dark suit with his penknife.

01:20:53Stabbing and stabbing it into the wood.

01:20:55Over and over.

01:20:58I've got something for you both.

01:21:01Rolo used to write poems.

01:21:03He didn't think much of them, but...

01:21:06I made them into a little book.

01:21:09Oh, that sun's beautiful.

01:21:23So much darkness.

01:21:27Rage.

01:21:30All the time we were at university, he was writing stuff like this.

01:21:34I used to think it was just a pose.

01:21:36I wonder if I have a really new room at all.

01:21:45I remember once he asked me if I thought I could choose to abandon the information.

01:21:51I wonder if that's what's happened.

01:21:54Maybe I was just tired of living in the shadows.

01:22:02Do you think there's bodies out there somewhere?

01:22:04Oh, Rolo.

01:22:11Let's go away, Tommy.

01:22:14Up we get.

01:22:15The information never did come back.

01:22:29Except that one time.

01:22:31The afternoon I came back from the hospital.

01:22:35I'd been with Kat at the birth of our twins.

01:22:38A boy and a girl.

01:22:38Our friend Ritchie was cooking for me.

01:22:43I was semi-dozing.

01:22:45Sound of the pots.

01:22:47Ritchie whistling.

01:22:49Traffic outside.

01:22:52Somebody hammering.

01:22:54Slowly.

01:22:56It all merged into a single voice.

01:23:00A kind of music.

01:23:01I can't quite believe I brought them about.

01:23:17Two new living things.

01:23:20Well, I had a bit of a hand in it as well.

01:23:22Oh, Linda.

01:23:26She does look like your mum.

01:23:28In what way?

01:23:29Something about the eyes.

01:23:32Kind of stubborn look.

01:23:34Little frown.

01:23:37And Michael?

01:23:38Does he look like your dad?

01:23:40Not really.

01:23:43Wrinkles.

01:23:44Bit of a pout.

01:23:46Cat.

01:23:48Cat.

01:23:51I'm terrified.

01:23:54That's the most frightening thing that's ever happened to me.

01:23:58You'll be a good father, Tommy.

01:24:04I feel, in a way, that my life is just beginning.

01:24:08An ordinary life.

01:24:09But that ordinariness has a beauty and a magic of its own.

01:24:13The smell of cat's hair.

01:24:15The touch of a tiny finger.

01:24:19The sound of church bells.

01:24:22The ravishing sound of bells.

01:24:25And when they stop.

01:24:28The silence.

01:24:30I've come to really value the sound of silence.

01:24:33In part two of The Sensitive Heart of Darkness by Alistair Jessamine.

01:24:37Thomas Souter was played by Robin Lang.

01:24:39Cat Logan by Julie Duncanson.

01:24:41Aaron Caldwell, Sean Biggerstaff.

01:24:44Suzanne Glenn, Molly Innes.

01:24:46Fraser McKinnon, Sean Scanlon.

01:24:48Rolo Caldwell, Stephen Duffy.

01:24:50D.I. Slater, Douglas Russell.

01:24:52And David Glenn by Liam Brennan.

01:24:55Other parts were played by the cast.

01:24:57The Sensitive Heart of Darkness was a BBC Scotland production.

01:25:00Directed in Glasgow by Bruce Young.

01:25:11D.I. Slater, Douglas

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