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#Toxic
#Toxic
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00:00I was dispatched to a criminal mischief called the caller she was very worried because she had
00:14just moved into that apartment complex with the intent of trying to hide from her estranged
00:19husband she was worried obviously that he had found her she said to you before you she said
00:26he's going to kill me before you people do anything yes 10 minutes later I was back there
00:32and Kate came out covered in blood and she collapsed immediately in front of the front door
00:37that particular case is the case that really put fear in my life Tom is very very intelligent
00:50they gave him a break because he had been in the military and look what happened I stood to lose
01:04three generations of my family in one night as I'm applying pressure to her gunshot wound she's looking
01:10up at me dead in the eyes and says I told you he was going to do this I will always remember that
01:17look in her eyes and her saying those words to me sorry it's hard for me to talk about this
01:31when it comes to love betrayal is the death of a thousand dreams
01:37and the unraveling of countless lives you can spend years picking up the pieces
01:47examining them rearranging them digging through the past to make sense of it all
01:54navigating through my personal heartbreak took me back to my roots as an investigative journalist
02:00it ignited a curiosity inside of me about love with fracture oh my god inflicts lasting trauma
02:12hi i wanted to see if they could ask you some questions absolutely not and can lead to tragedy
02:17and that's when my world ended i feel that it's part of my calling to meet with the victims
02:22the survivors to listen to their stories show how it can happen to anyone and expose the truth
02:29i'm elizabeth chambers and this is toxic
02:36the past few years i have been fixated on the idea of generational behavior how does trauma and
02:48abuse pass down through generations how much is nurture how much is nature how do we break the
02:55cycle can we break the cycle these questions led me to a book called killing kate written by survivor
03:02kate ranta whose personal experience with generational trauma sent a shockwave through her entire family
03:10i connected with kate and she agreed to share her story
03:16you look fab thank you
03:23okay thank you so much for sitting down with us tell me a little bit about yourself
03:27so i grew up um in lanoka harbor new jersey so the jersey shore my parents were both educators
03:35i had an idyllic upbringing we ate dinner together as a family every night loving caring nurturing just
03:44beautiful parents as a child katie was bright and ebullient and sparkly i always thought of her as
03:53dancing to the tune of a different drummer you know she was her own person you know from the get-go
04:00i was not the little girl who was into the disney princesses thinking about my perfect you know
04:08husband i didn't like dream of my fabulous wedding i met my first husband actually while i was in college
04:16we got married when i was 24 and i i left i wanted a divorce by the time i was like 27.
04:28i always say like i had no business getting married that young
04:33after leaving my first marriage i met my second husband it was like a whirlwind of passion it was
04:42it was that that feeling i think that i was kind of searching for unfortunately it just um it just
04:52kind of spiraled um after i had my my older son with him so we got divorced i just didn't have um
05:03like the strength and security and trust that i wanted in those relationships
05:08in the summer of 2007 i was a single mom my son henry was um three and a half it was kind of the
05:18beginning of online dating i saw tom's profile he was a captain in the air force and i never dated
05:27anybody in the military before what stood out for you about tom's profile he was extremely handsome
05:35blue eyes big warm smile i found him very very attractive our first date we had flowers and then
05:45the date went great so tom told kate that he came from a military family his dad had been a pilot and
05:52he also had served in the air force tom handled vendor contracts for the air force tom had never
05:57been deployed overseas but he let kate know that he'd be shipping off to iraq in just a couple months
06:02he told kate he had been married once before but that his wife had cheated on him so he had left her
06:07that's all he said about his ex-wife she was in the rear view and now he was looking ahead to kate
06:13he really asked a lot of questions on that first date about about myself we like made out it was you
06:21know it was like you know we definitely had like physical attraction too our relationship progressed
06:27very very quickly within three months he asked me to move in i think with tom i i felt like i had it
06:37all i finally had all of the things that i wanted having help with my son little things like picking him
06:48up from daycare just making life easier getting the oil changed in my car cooking dinner shopping sprees
06:56i don't want to sound shallow and that it was like a money thing only because that's not me after
07:01you know being a single mom and kind of paycheck to paycheck and struggling and to have that feeling
07:07of being taken care of was something that i didn't think i was missing but in that moment it it felt really
07:15good in september of 2007 i was just at home it was in the evening
07:22my phone rang it was a man and he said tom he's been in a motorcycle accident and it's really bad
07:32he had crashed um into like a car and flipped over and and you know was in really bad shape
07:40i remember calling my mom and like crying and flipping out and thinking in my head like i finally met
07:48the guy and now this happens i got there and he was all sort of bandaged up he had broken both wrists
07:59and had a lower leg fracture like the bone had come out it was it was a really bad accident
08:09it wasn't even a thought about taking off work and being there for him his family wasn't coming down
08:16to help i found that to be outrageous i hadn't met his family but his mother didn't make plans to come
08:24down and he was estranged from his father by the time i met him tom would brag about his his dad being
08:34a pilot in the air force but then on the other hand would say that he was a sociopath
08:39he said that his dad was upset with him for ending the marriage that he was in before he met me even
08:49though tom had been cheated on his father was like what did you do and blamed him and so he really didn't
08:56seem to have anybody that cared that much i knew if something like that happened to me and my parents
09:03and you know my family would be there in a heartbeat i definitely wanted to show him that i was there for
09:11him the way he was for me how did he react to you being there for him what he said to me was that he
09:17he knew that i was a good girl i stayed by his side and that's when he knew that he wanted to marry me
09:28he asked me to go get the ring out of his closet and bring it back to the hospital and he proposed to me
09:38the engagement suddenly was on a fast track but it felt so good in that moment
09:44and that accident actually kept him from being deployed to iraq i was so happy so what are we
09:53waiting for right around new year's i found out that i was pregnant with william we decided to run
10:03off to vegas and get married just us i was so happy that day after our wedding very next morning we had
10:12gone out to brunch had a good time got back in the car we were heading back to our hotel
10:20and he said you know i went through the steps in my head about how i would kill my ex-wife
10:32it came out of nowhere nothing prompted this we weren't talking about exes
10:37there's literally no setup for the comment that he made
10:47so he says to you i went through the steps on how i'd kill my ex-wife what is going through your mind
10:53when he's saying this to you i said what he said yeah well my therapist told me that that's like a
11:00normal part of processing and not that i would really go through with it i know that sounds
11:07extremely disturbing i don't know how to explain it other than i didn't want to hear it i found the
11:14guy i was excited i'm married and i'm pregnant and i'm starting this this new life
11:21he was great throughout the pregnancy very helpful doting on me put the crib together he went to the
11:31prenatal appointments with me all of them um he was there he really was
11:38kate told me that she and tom had a normal two years together it was healthy happy stable
11:44and they were just focused on raising their child tom was stationed at fort belvoir in virginia but
11:50after 25 years in the air force he was going to retire kate and tom bought a new home in florida
11:56because they wanted to be closer to kate's parents but kate's parents told me they were not exactly
12:01sold on their new son-in-law tom was was kind of standoffish and he he very quiet he always wanted to
12:11retire for the night early so he would say goodnight and he'd go upstairs and we would try to have a
12:19conversation the three of us but her cell phone was blowing up because he was constantly text messaging
12:26her while we're trying to have a conversation downstairs that's a big red flag when we moved to
12:33florida maintaining friendships and relationships while with tom was extremely difficult tom did not
12:44want me to have male friends on social media at all he really dug in his heels about it saying that
12:52social media would open the door for infidelity i worked my way around it saying okay i'll only
13:03have my family have my family and female friends he said that if a man did friend request me he wanted
13:10to know about it telling your partner they can't be on social media because it is quote unquote
13:17a door to infidelity is extreme control there was no precedent for this to happen like she hadn't had
13:24an affair with someone she had met on social media it's his way of ensuring that she's not engaging with
13:29other people and it's his way of ensuring that he has control she can only pay attention to one thing
13:35at a time and it has to be him these examples of control and isolation are across the board it never
13:41just stops with one thing tom would tell me exactly how i should look he wanted it was like long blonde
13:50hair don't dress too provocatively that sort of stuff when did things with tom really start to escalate
13:58it was right around new year's at this point everything started to spiral there was substance abuse
14:07with pain pills that the military was giving to him like candy because of his motorcycle injuries and
14:12it was it began to be terrifying from complete control into chaos manic behavior and then one day
14:23i had been laughing about like a post on facebook and the comment was from like a guy i had gone to
14:31high school with well he decided that that was a massive issue and left the house and then
14:42proceeded to blow my phone up incessantly texting me saying that he was at a strip club and he was so
14:54drunk and he was surrounded by all these hot women shortly after that he came home and walked into
15:02the master bedroom and closed the door locked it locked me out all of a sudden i heard like
15:12i ran out to the front stoop i called 911 and the garage door opened and out he comes holding william
15:24he got into the car in the driveway and put will on his lap my instinct was to jump in the car he
15:32peeled out of the driveway and sped down the street and i was just begging and begging like just give me the
15:39the baby just just please give me the baby give me the baby he looked at me and i saw who he really
15:49was and he raised his fist and was like get out of this car right now or i'm gonna punch you in your face
15:57so i just jumped out and he peeled around the corner and still had william so i come running down
16:06the street was sobbing hysterical and there he is out front with the cops and he had these military
16:17coins so in the military units will have their own coins and they trade them and collect them he was out
16:23there coining all the cops establishing himself as this you know military veteran saying he's been in
16:30a humvee explosion in iraq that caused his injuries which we know didn't happen because he had never
16:37deployed to iraq ever there was no humvee explosion his injuries came from that motorcycle accident
16:44the police allowed him to stay in the house and made me leave and go to my parents house i wanted
16:54nothing to do with tom i was like go ahead and live in it i'm done the very next day kate went with her
17:04dad to the courthouse to get a restraining order she also emailed tom's commanding officer to tell him
17:09what was going on and he was shocked since tom worked remotely his commanding officer had no idea
17:15that tom had moved off the base it turned out that tom had forged the moving orders and was officially
17:24awol from the military that sparked an investigation by the office of special investigations so it's like
17:32the military's fbi tom immediately drove from florida back up to virginia because he knew he was in
17:42trouble i do think i actually at that point felt a sense of relief kate told me that tom was forced
17:49to move back to the base in virginia as the air force began investigating him the military detained him
17:56but he didn't stay long he went awol again while they were holding him they lost him
18:02katie got a call from someone in the military there saying that there was no indication of where he
18:09could be but he could be coming south how concerned were you about katie and will's safety not to
18:15mention your own during this time you were always like on the alert you know tense anticipating
18:23something then we went to a hotel for a couple of days we were told you know don't tell anyone where
18:30you are for our own protection until they could find him i was looking over my shoulder i was
18:38definitely living in fear wasn't sure what was coming next and it was very uneasy because it was so quiet
18:44i had a feeling that got feeling that something was coming
18:59almost 48 hours after going awol kate received a call that tom had returned to the base they gave kate
19:05no details about where he had been only that it was safe for the family to return home and that was it
19:11the military wrapped up their investigation and their recommendation was that tom should be
19:16court-martialed but as kate explained to me that didn't happen at all even though the investigation
19:22unit found him guilty of fraud against the military the commanders were given the choice on what to do
19:30and so i got the call that they were going to retire him with his full pension so i cried
19:37and said he's dangerous and now he's angry because he knows that i reported him and you're letting him
19:45go you can't do this you can't do this and they said well we handled it administratively then the ties
19:52to the military were severed and he was out in the wild
19:58that summer was very difficult for me tom had gotten some job out in seattle and then
20:06within three months he stopped paying his portion of the bills my car got repossessed my mortgage
20:13wasn't getting paid i was being crushed financially facing obviously another marriage that didn't work
20:22out i was vulnerable just not in a good place that's when he texted me and even though he wasn't
20:32supposed to because of the temporary restraining order he did and he said the incident that it was
20:37just a bad night he promised that he was clean he wasn't taking pain pills anymore things had just
20:44gotten a little out of control i wanted to believe him and little by little he was able to weasel his way back into my life
20:56um i um wanted to put my family back together i did not want to get divorced again
21:10life is difficult enough when you have a partner
21:13you have a child and then you have a job and then you remove the partner and you don't have child care
21:20you don't have support and you're doing it all on your own
21:24it's hard and you're struggling every day so i completely sympathize with her i i completely
21:29understand in a lot of ways tom could be the answer to all of her problems
21:34he promised that he was getting a six-figure job and i could you know be a stay-at-home mom and raise
21:41william all of that stuff sounded amazing i know the statistic is that it takes a woman
21:50like seven to nine times to leave her abuser this was my moment um i just wanted it to work out
21:59and i took him back we decided that he would move back to florida
22:07do you regret taking him back i 100 regret taking him back things did not feel good or right ever again
22:18here this says everything we need to know about why he is who he is with people like tom i'm always
22:36looking for the root of their behavior and in reading kate's book his relationship with his father
22:41really stood up to me kate says do my parents know tom very well not really no one knew him well
22:48he didn't say much about himself or his life or his childhood other than minor anecdotes about his
22:53father being pretty tough especially with his brothers he hit them he said that he cheated on
22:58his mom he never said anything about his dad being abusive towards his mom but i'd put money down on
23:04that his father just owned him called him a narcissist and said he was divisive manipulative
23:09and that he wasn't a good person unfortunately what we do know is that generational family trauma is very
23:17very real how are you a healthy loving husband and father when this is your father you know like that
23:24is that it starts here do you believe that tom's childhood attributed to the way he behaved tom's
23:33childhood a lot of it is what he told me tom would recollect stories of his father beating them in the
23:41basement just being really a tyrant i mean i have to think that the things that happened in his childhood
23:49you know affected who he became as as a man then look what he did to whip
23:59so it was three months into the reconciliation william he didn't feel good he couldn't sleep and maybe
24:06a couple hours later went into the room to check on him like we know our children and something was
24:12wrong he was kind of like woozy and like reaching out like he was hallucinating and i i knew i knew
24:22he gave him something something was wrong i would call 911
24:28get into the hospital and the sheriff was standing by the nurse's station he made eye contact with me
24:36and really subtly it was like the like come here is everything okay at home and i said no everything's
24:44not okay and he said okay well when you get home a child protective services investigator will be meeting
24:51you there my name is shinitra sims formerly a child protective investigator for the broward sheriff's
24:58office child protective investigation section
25:00we got home and she met us at the door uh immediately separated us so had tom in one room
25:10and me in another and she said to me she wanted me to pack a bag for myself and a bag for william
25:19and go to my parents house you need to go over there for the safety of your child and make sure you stay
25:25at the house and if i find out that you're returned back home then i will definitely remove your child
25:31from your custody when you said this to kate and you gave her this ultimatum what was her response
25:35and how did she seem at the time i'll do whatever i need to protect my child that was a pivotal key
25:43moment in my story of getting away from him because she provided me that out that i needed
25:51the hospital ran tests on will and ultimately they couldn't conclude whether or not he had been
25:56drugged so cps closed the investigation and no charges were brought against tom it was incredibly
26:03frustrating and for the next year everything started to spiral you know he was terrorizing us he had broken
26:13into our home during this time tom's stalking escalated kate shared a laundry list of offenses
26:21with me for example knowing her financial struggles tom emailed the ceo and the vp of her company
26:28with the subject line rogue employee anonymously accusing her of drinking and sleeping on the job
26:35unbelievable constantly emailing me and texting me threatening to take custody of william
26:42the fact that after all of this kate still had to share custody of will with tom is unfathomable
26:50thinking about how she felt at this time makes me physically ill they didn't have a custodial
26:56agreement in place at this time so she had to give will to tom for hours sometimes days and never
27:03know when she was going to see her son again he would ignore kate's texts and calls because
27:08he knew that legally he didn't have to bring him back before we started this interview we were
27:13looking at pictures and you were the cutest little kid your mom and i have talked about i have a son
27:18who's who's seven and there's nothing like a boy and his mom like there is just it's such a special bond
27:24do you have any good memories of your dad anything that really exhibited care parental love i don't remember
27:31him like showing affection that was just like his general demeanor that you remember him just being
27:37feeling like overpowering he was sending creepy letters and cards addressed to me vandalized my car
27:45in my father's car the police came out no proof can't do anything about it this part infuriates me
27:54just when kate thought things couldn't get any worse tom kicks off a custody battle with a horrendous
28:01accusation at one point i had gotten a call at work from she just saying that a call had come in
28:08about child abuse allegations against me on william i immediately knew it was tom tom filed a report to
28:18cps against kate saying that he found bruises on will's leg implying that kate had been physically
28:24abusive to her son thankfully shanitras saw that report and knew that tom was lying so shanitras jumped
28:30into action and took it upon herself to meet with tom and to tell him that unless he met with a judge to
28:36discuss a custodial arrangement he would never see his son again by all means i will notify him
28:43that you could not see this kid again i'm not there to be anyone's friends it's about child safety
28:53i call her our guardian angel because she was the first person that actually saw tom for what and who
29:01he is she understood that he was dangerous she believed me after she just had the conversation
29:12with tom about how he wasn't allowed to see william until we had a custody agreement everything went
29:19really quiet i had a feeling that something was coming i knew that that was a first step in an
29:33authority figure telling him he couldn't do something he would view that as losing and he can't lose
29:39i was looking over my shoulder i was definitely living in fear wasn't sure what was coming next tom is
29:51still living in florida so i was taking steps to keep us safe so that october of 2012 i moved into
30:01a new apartment tell me about the night of the incident it was a friday we go out to my car
30:11i got to the passenger side front tire there was a slash i was like oh he found me
30:21called the police my dad showed up he stayed in the apartment with will i went outside to talk to
30:27it was a young female police officer i was dispatched to a criminal mischief call i asked if she
30:34knew possibly who may be involved or who would have did this if she's been having any issues with
30:38anyone that was when she started to tell me about her estranged husband i had no witnesses i had no
30:47leads so without those elements i was not able to investigate that any further did she show you a
30:53picture of him or describe his vehicle no and would that be something typically that you would ask for
30:59no there is somebody that she thinks is responsible for it no i mean if she had pointed out oh he's over
31:06there and his car is over there it would have been so easy and so clear-cut but we had no evidence of
31:12that and she told me she had never seen him in the complex before i could tell she was frustrated
31:18and i could understand where she was coming from as she was leaving i said to her he's going to have
31:25to kill us before you people do anything about him i went back into the house my dad was like i'm gonna
31:36go home he gets part way up the walkway and he turns back around i saw tom's car and he said katie call
31:47911 tom is here i just had a really bad feeling by the time we got in the door tom had made it to my
32:03door and like began pushing against it and we were both on the other side like pushing against it trying
32:10to keep him out and then all of a sudden it was like boom boom boom ma'am hello hello ma'am did you just
32:22say that he shot you yes okay they're coming they're coming to help you i backed up dad went one way will
32:31was standing there i remember seeing red like the entire time just chaos one of the bullets that went
32:38through the door actually hit me in the chest and so i was losing a lot of blood i remember looking
32:44at my hand and it just wilted it just you know it just wilted i had no use of it anymore he came in
32:53and raised the gun again and shot and the bullet went like directly through my right hand and i was
33:02screaming begging for my life and then i just heard boom and i heard my dad grunt and i thought he had
33:11killed i thought he had killed my father like like right then the gun had a laser light on it
33:20he was pointing it like this and like taunting me i just remember being like covered in blood my clothes
33:26were sticking to me and then he came over with the gun and then will all of a sudden yelled don't do it
33:35daddy don't you mommy i don't remember how i did it or i just remembered just saying it and just yelling
33:41it that's really brave for a four-year-old to yell something to save his mom's life i remember hearing
33:47him walk around into the kitchen area at this point it had been 15 minutes at least no police came in
34:00it was about 10 minutes since i had left we had a barricaded subject with possible victims or hostages
34:06inside the protocols are to establish a perimeter and try and contain the suspect i was waiting i
34:13thought he was gonna shoot me in the head and then it got quiet and then he said kate just go i got
34:21up and i i ran out i collapsed on the ground covered in blood i need help i need help i need help right
34:29down can you go outside you're outside yeah she knows outside i could see police cars and they said ma'am
34:38can you get over to us um you know the best thing we felt was for her if she can get up and come to
34:45us that way we're not sending officers into a rescue in front of a front door with uh a armed gunman
34:54still inside somebody help me we're not gonna do her any good if we get shot too and then we're all
35:02down in front of the front door please my fire is inside the floor tom was still inside with my dad
35:09with william
35:14right here this is where i collapsed right on that patch of grass right there and the police were where
35:21just all lined up right here you know with their vests and guns and i'm laying there on the ground
35:27saying i i can't i can't move i'm dying help me and they wouldn't come near me inside tom had his
35:35pistol dexter ammunition the knife the flashlight all lined up i remember seeing him just like behind
35:45the counter just seeming crazy i stood up and i gathered william and i just told him it's time
35:53for us to leave william he didn't say a thing i didn't say a thing and then we got outdoors
35:59kate was on the ground nearby the apartment door i love you i love you i love you i said
36:05you gotta get up you have to have the strength and i'll help you they stood up and they were able
36:10to come by the cars that we were using for cover the young female officer that had walked away
36:20was over me saying i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry and i was like i told you
36:27when kate was looking you dead in the eyes saying that how did it make you feel horrific that is what
36:32is burned in my brain you know forever pretty much i will always remember that look in her eyes and
36:39her her saying those words to me do you have any regrets about how the calls were handled that night
36:45no i mean i think i've kind of already yeah explained how and why but it's i know personally
36:54deep down that i handled the call appropriately i know that i did the investigation i could do i know
36:58that i offered whatever advice i could it seemed like kate was doing everything she could you know
37:04unfortunately we can't control what other people are going to do when kate was lying on the ground
37:12they realized that not only was she shot in the hand but she also had a very severe chest wound
37:18so kate was airlifted out and her dad was taken by ambulance to the hospital
37:25thank god will was physically unharmed during this incident shortly after the suspect actually
37:33came out and was taken into custody
37:35from the very first incident tom's mo was to play this affable veteran and to lean on a deployment
37:43that never happened all with the intent of evading justice
37:46after the shooting my dad and i met with our prosecutor uh she was a straight shooter and
38:04she told us that the story that tom wove was that he was depressed and like having some ptsd symptoms
38:12from you know his iraq yeah his non-deployment um and that he had gone to the va that day and then
38:21prescribed new medications after his arrest tom was denied bail and remained in custody
38:27the trial began on february 6 2017 four and a half years after the attack even after being caught with a
38:35literal smoking gun tom still leaned on this insane defense tom decided to plead not guilty the defense
38:44said it was involuntary intoxication basically it was like adverse reaction and that made him want
38:51to come murder us and we were warned from the start that no trial is a slam dunk because we have
38:59such a love affair respect for our military he's always played that card and it's always gotten him
39:05out of jail free we did have kind of side fears going into trial for that reason the jury took only
39:14two days to reach a verdict you know it felt like an eternity for us once they went into deliberations
39:20they came back and they found him guilty the judge sentenced him to 60 years no parole that's a life
39:30sentence and he's he's never getting out what do you think drives tom's abuse and manipulative ways i
39:38don't have a degree in psychology but in trying to put the pieces together about who i married and who
39:45this person really is and what's wrong with him i mean i believe he's a full-blown psychopath
39:52you mentioned earlier your dad's dad was abusive i'm sure that was learned behavior from his father
40:00and biologically you're a project of your father does that ever make you concerned or hyper aware of
40:07certain tendencies that he had for yourself there definitely is like a worry you know just like what
40:13if but i like to think that i grew past all of what you know he might have put to me i like to think
40:21that i'm nothing like him will isn't this it's not a gift out of all of this but you know watching
40:31him become a young man i'm so proud of him he really is just coming into his own he's not tom he's not a
40:38product of his dad he's not a product in any way shape or form we survived as a family being surrounded
40:46by love and support and that's all william knows i know that i lived through this because there's a
40:53purpose and that's why i started publicly sharing this journey i mean the fact that we're all here to
41:02tell this is a miracle amazing anthony is leaving a string of victims in his wake and he's doing it
41:14in the sickest way possible it was young psychological manipulation later on grotesquely it was sexual
41:21this is not him starting his life over and finding us happily ever after anthony hi that's okay who are
41:26you talking to i have no comment do you have any remorse from 10 years ago