Peep Show: Canadian Glue Court Case

Beasley Digital

Dave & Chuck the Freak talk about a man who glued himself to the front of a business and part of his probation is that he cannot possess adhesives.

Transcript

00:00The Idiot Criminal of the Day

00:08Another wacky sentence from this Canadian crime story to tell you about here.

00:15A protester who glued himself to the doors of a bank

00:21has been sentenced to a 12 months probation

00:26and he can no longer have any glue, eh?

00:29No way!

00:31How's he gonna do anything, eh, crap related?

00:34No glue.

00:35No scrapbooking!

00:36No glue for you, eh?

00:37Oh, come on, eh?

00:38No glue!

00:39What about, uh, glue in your twig?

00:42No glue!

00:44What part?

00:45Don't you understand, eh?

00:47None!

00:49No glue.

00:50I didn't know it would be this bad, eh?

00:56Your honor, that's ridiculous, eh?

00:59There's a lot of things you need to glue.

01:00Super glue?

01:01The plaintiff is making the point that he needs the glue for his twigs and things.

01:06What if a small piece of Fabergé was to fall and I had to re-glue it?

01:11It was super glue, eh?

01:13Like a Fabergé egg, is that what you're-

01:15That's right, eh?

01:16Some kind of a glass, glass menagerie.

01:20How often are you likely to glue a Fabergé egg?

01:22I've got it, eh!

01:23I've got it!

01:24You lie in the court.

01:26What about models?

01:27Modeling?

01:28Well that could be more-

01:29What about a model glue, eh?

01:30It's still not acceptable!

01:31What, is he on a list?

01:33He's got that model of the Canadian Parliament he needs to put together.

01:36I was gonna- I had a- I had a life- I had a one- a one thirty second model, eh?

01:42Of, uh, Mountie.

01:43What a weird thing.

01:44On a horse, eh?

01:45They have to put up in stores, like, his pictures.

01:47Oh, sorry.

01:48Like, don't sell glue to this man.

01:50Hey, psst, psst.

01:51Yeah?

01:52Listen, eh, I need some glue, eh?

01:54I got a couple of home improvement projects.

01:56Oh, it's that guy!

01:57It's that glue guy!

01:58Oh, God, I gotta go!

01:59Hey, hey, hey, hey!

02:00He's trying to go!

02:01Stop him!

02:02He's gonna go himself to the store!

02:03Get him, you, eh!

02:04He's going into Michael's, the arts and crafts store, eh?

02:08Oh, my God, they know him there.

02:10Oh, yeah.

02:11They're not gonna be like-

02:12He won't even get in the door.

02:13He knows not to go there.

02:14He knows not to go there.

02:15No.

02:16Time to try Ace Hardware, eh?

02:18Better go to Canadian Tire, eh?

02:20It's home hardware.

02:21It's home hardware.

02:22Yeah, home hardware.

02:23I better go to Canadian Tire, eh?

02:25They intercept an illegal glue shipment.

02:29Yeah.

02:30Howard Breen is seen glued to the front door of this Royal Bank branch.

02:35I'm glued, eh?

02:36Pretty tight.

02:37He was protesting that they stop investing money in a pipeline in Northern British Columbia.

02:43It's just his hand, it looks like?

02:46Yeah, he glued his hand to the handle of the door.

02:48Oh, man.

02:49That's gonna suck for him.

02:50That's not gonna be good.

02:52Hmm.

02:53They asked for 12 months probation and then also added on he cannot possess glue.

03:02Your Honor, we can deal with the probation, eh?

03:05No problem, eh?

03:06What?

03:07But the lack of glue?

03:09And, uh, they limit it to, uh, he cannot possess any glue, super glue, adhesive, fixative,

03:14or resin.

03:15Nothing.

03:16Except with the permission of his probation officer.

03:19So...

03:20He's gonna be like, hey man, I gotta glue something.

03:22Yeah.

03:23Hey, listen, eh?

03:24My kid gave me this 1932 Ford model, eh?

03:27But I'm gonna need some of that model glue, eh?

03:31What do you think?

03:32What do you think?

03:33And then the guy says, okay, and then he's glued to another bag.

03:36Yeah, yeah.

03:37Ah!

03:38Ah, you said...

03:39Gotcha!

03:40Gotcha, eh?

03:41He said it was okay, eh?

03:43Should've never given me glue, eh, dummy?

03:45He said it was for a model.

03:46Now my job's on the way, eh?

03:47Ha, ha, ha!

03:49You lose, eh?

03:52A day in Canadian court.

03:54Yeah, that's pretty wild.

03:55There you go.

Category

Transcript

Recommended