Lottery Ticket Idiot, Nuke Plant Blues, and Death By Ice Cream

Beasley Digital

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00:00Where it's time for our No Sweat News, because Rob Zombie tickets are coming up on tomorrow's No Sweat News quiz.

00:06Everyone loves Rob Zombie. Whenever he comes into town, there's a clamoring for tickets, so you want to be paying attention.

00:13Here we go. You know, there's a rule on the No Sweat News, Dave, that says you're not allowed to die.

00:19Don't die. Don't ever die.

00:21There's no rule against...

00:22It's a good rule. It's a good rule for life. Just don't die. It would make things so much easier.

00:27No, I'm looking forward to the dirt nap at some point. I'll be honest with you there.

00:31Look, listen, there's no rule against some near misses, and we got a couple of near misses today.

00:38This would put a little bit of a damper on your relaxing beach day.

00:43As we go to New Hampshire for story number one, bunch of people on the beach in Seabrook, New Hampshire on Tuesday

00:49when they heard an alert coming from the nuclear power plant nearby.

00:54Yo! That's the last place you want to hear an alert from.

01:01Here you go.

01:02The alert from the system said there is a problem at the Seabrook nuclear power station,

01:17and it told everybody to leave the area immediately.

01:19The problem better be just like the garage door isn't opening.

01:23If there's any problem above that level, I'm freaking out.

01:29I'm getting the kids in the car, and we're driving to California.

01:32That's what everyone started doing.

01:34It turned out that workers at the plants were testing the emergency system

01:38and accidentally played the alert by mistake.

01:42Everything was fine.

01:43And they sent out text messages to follow up saying you can just go change your underwear and come back to the beach.

01:49I want to know where Homer J. Simpson was during this near nuclear, during this almost Chernobyl event that happened in America.

01:57Here's the next near miss.

02:00An ice cream brand in Kansas City called Belafonte just issued a recall for an ice cream flavor called chocolate to die for.

02:09Yeah.

02:09Because it could kill people.

02:11No.

02:12Well, see, what happened was they got a complaint after someone realized that the packaging fails to mention that the ice cream contains peanuts.

02:20Oh, yeah.

02:21That could kill you.

02:22If you have an extreme allergy to peanuts, like, you know, we have a third wheel here.

02:27Your Gats has that.

02:28Then it could be really dangerous.

02:30It actually could be the ice cream that could kill you.

02:32So the chocolate to die for could kill you.

02:36And so they got to redo the packaging.

02:38Yeah, not interested in that.

02:40And then Dateline Ireland for this one.

02:43Back in January, Wayne Sullivan used a plastic toy gun to rob a convenience store in Dublin.

02:50He got away with a small amount of cash and a large stack of lottery scratch-offs.

02:55Oh, okay.

02:56This week, Wayne Sullivan was caught because one of the scratch-offs hit for five grand and he tried to collect the money.

03:04Yes, sir.

03:05You got to try and get the cash.

03:08Our hero even wrote his name and address on the back of the cards.

03:12No one could claim it other than him.

03:14Well, see, now that was a bad move.

03:17That made it even easier for the guardie to track him down.

03:21Yesterday, a judge sentenced our hero, Wayne Sullivan, to a year and a half in jail.

03:26Sully, you're getting a year.

03:28There it is.

03:28We'll see you in 365, dirtbag.

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