- today
Good Girls Gone Wild #ReelShort
#shortfilm #reelshort #dramabox #short #kalostv #shortdrama #fyp #film #shortmax #tv #movie #movies #reelshorts
#shortfilm #reelshort #dramabox #short #kalostv #shortdrama #fyp #film #shortmax #tv #movie #movies #reelshorts
Category
š„
Short filmTranscript
00:00:00Music
00:00:30Oh, my God.
00:00:35Hello?
00:00:36Cheryl, we have to talk about our birthday plans.
00:00:39I mean, it's only two days away,
00:00:40and we still haven't decided the perfect way to celebrate.
00:00:43So I was thinking maybe we could all take a trip to...
00:00:47Sue, I meant to tell you before, but I wanted to be sure.
00:00:52I think I'm going to spend my birthday with Jake.
00:00:55I'm going to lose my virginity to him.
00:00:57You know, I want to surprise him.
00:00:59What?
00:01:00But you can't.
00:01:01I mean, I thought we were going to wait until marriage.
00:01:04Besides, you can't do that to us.
00:01:06You can't break tradition that way.
00:01:09This is bad.
00:01:10You know, I'm going to tell Lexi.
00:01:12She's going to be very unhappy about this.
00:01:21Come on, Lexi.
00:01:22So, girls, what are we going to do for our birthday?
00:01:37What are we going to do for our birthday?
00:01:38I don't know.
00:01:39I don't know.
00:01:39Sue, we have plenty of time to figure something out.
00:01:42But this is the big 1-8.
00:01:45I mean, every year since her mom's met in the hospital, we've done something new and special.
00:01:49But this has to be newer and more special.
00:01:51So what's something we've never done before?
00:01:54Mushrooms?
00:01:55No, not like that.
00:01:57Like something nice.
00:01:58Like maybe a trip.
00:01:59Like a mushroom trip?
00:02:00No.
00:02:01Sorry, Sue.
00:02:02I have a date.
00:02:03So do I.
00:02:04Sorry, Sue.
00:02:05Don't worry, Sue.
00:02:06We'll figure it out.
00:02:07Oh, flowers.
00:02:08Are these from you?
00:02:09Yeah, sure.
00:02:10Here you go.
00:02:11No card, but I thought I saw one.
00:02:12I didn't know how to put my feelings into words.
00:02:22I guess you still make me nervous.
00:02:39Nervous.
00:02:41Oh, Jake.
00:02:46Maybe I should come in and hang out for a minute.
00:02:49No, Jake, not yet.
00:02:51When we do it, I want it to be really special.
00:02:53The best night of my life.
00:02:55It will be, I promise.
00:02:57It'll always be amazing, with you and me, together.
00:03:01Jake, no.
00:03:09I have to go.
00:03:10I have to work on my art project.
00:03:12You know, I thought art was going to be a really easy elective,
00:03:15but I guess I should have taken more math.
00:03:18So you're going to come to my birthday, okay?
00:03:21This Saturday?
00:03:22Of course.
00:03:27Thanks.
00:03:28Okay, bye.
00:03:31Nothing, nothing, nothing.
00:03:41Oh, baby, you're so hot.
00:03:43I'm going to do you so good.
00:03:45Oh, yeah, baby.
00:03:46Yeah.
00:03:47What was your name again?
00:03:48Rod.
00:03:49Sex God.
00:03:54Lexi is so upset, she's speechless.
00:03:58Yeah, right, I bet.
00:04:01Cheryl's losing her virginity on Saturday?
00:04:09Oh, no.
00:04:10Does not compute.
00:04:11Want to talk in person, ASAP.
00:04:14Oh, huh, hi.
00:04:23When did you get home?
00:04:24So is it true?
00:04:25Yes, it is.
00:04:26It's just, it's the right time and Jake's the right man.
00:04:28I mean, he's handsome and smart and wealthy and he has a really bright future ahead of him.
00:04:36So I just think it's the right time.
00:04:38Lexi, tell her.
00:04:39Lexi, tell her.
00:04:40Losing our virginity is one of those milestones we should all face together.
00:04:43On our birthday, yes, but not on this birthday.
00:04:46Like, maybe on our 23rd birthday.
00:04:48Or maybe even like our 29th, 8th, maybe.
00:04:53Listen, guys, I'm, I know it's tradition, but I'm sorry.
00:05:01I know it's tradition, but I'm sorry.
00:05:10That's Cheryl.
00:05:11Sue is right.
00:05:12We do always do something special on our birthday.
00:05:15Does Jake really have such a tiny little needle dick?
00:05:19It's not Jake.
00:05:20It's the male ideal.
00:05:22Like, a Greek god or Sue's dad.
00:05:26Right.
00:05:28Yeah, I guess you're right.
00:05:30I mean, it kind of sucks.
00:05:31I'm not really an artist.
00:05:33Girls, can you just stop changing the subject?
00:05:35The point is, we should all lose our virginities together on the same day.
00:05:39And I'm just not ready yet.
00:05:41I'm waiting for a sign.
00:05:42And then I'll know it's right.
00:05:44Look, I can go either way.
00:05:46I mean, I'm fine with just 69, 79, anal.
00:05:51I don't feel any rush to actually do the deed.
00:05:53Besides, I know it'll never live up to my rabbit anyway.
00:05:57But if you want to do it this year, then maybe we all should.
00:06:02You know, it could be like our big 18th birthday thing.
00:06:09Where are you going at 6.30 in the morning?
00:06:12To church to pray for you.
00:06:14I want to be first in line.
00:06:16I'm getting Mrs.
00:06:18Yeah, me too.
00:06:19Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.
00:06:30It has been four days since my last confession.
00:06:32I accuse myself of the following sins.
00:06:34Okay, so I'm really embarrassed to talk about this, but it's about sex.
00:06:45I mean, not me.
00:06:46I've never gone past second base with a guy.
00:06:48I've never even seen a guy's...
00:06:50Well, there was that one time I took the pants off my Ken doll, but I was dressing him up as Jesus and I wanted to see his thing, but there was nothing there.
00:07:00Okay, so it's about my friends.
00:07:05My best friends.
00:07:07They're going to do something really bad this weekend.
00:07:09Okay.
00:07:10Third base.
00:07:11Third base.
00:07:11What?
00:07:12No.
00:07:13Like, sex.
00:07:14Like, intercourse?
00:07:16With boys, they barely even know.
00:07:18I mean, they really need us intervention, if you know what I mean.
00:07:21All the way.
00:07:22Go all the way.
00:07:24What?
00:07:25What?
00:07:26What?
00:07:27Ah!
00:07:28Ah!
00:07:29How could you do so?
00:07:31You're a bad, bad person!
00:07:34What?
00:07:37Yes!
00:07:42Yes!
00:07:43Run!
00:07:44Run!
00:07:45Home route!
00:07:46Ah!
00:07:47Damn it!
00:07:49Fucking Yankees!
00:07:52Sorry.
00:08:16Sue, it is 1 p.m.
00:08:19Would you have a little consideration?
00:08:21I'm trying to sleep.
00:08:23Geez.
00:08:24Can you guys please keep it down?
00:08:26I have an announcement to make.
00:08:28I want to do it.
00:08:30Do you hear me?
00:08:31I want to do it.
00:08:33This weekend.
00:08:35On our birthday.
00:08:36Do what?
00:08:38It.
00:08:39Screw.
00:08:40You know, screwing, boning, making the beast with two backs.
00:08:43You know, shagging.
00:08:45Fucking!
00:08:46You do.
00:08:49Uh, but what about all your religious stuff?
00:08:52And, um, what about your sign from heaven?
00:08:55Oh, I got a sign.
00:08:56At church.
00:08:57Really?
00:08:58Well.
00:08:59Okay, great.
00:09:01We're all in then.
00:09:03So we'll have a big pool party and we'll do it there.
00:09:06Right?
00:09:08Right.
00:09:09I'll start making the shopping list.
00:09:20Hey, Frank.
00:09:22Hi, Sue.
00:09:24Guys, we didn't invite Frank to the party.
00:09:26I don't know.
00:09:27Do you think he'd even have fun?
00:09:28Yeah.
00:09:29He's blind.
00:09:30Blind people can do everything regular people can do.
00:09:32Hey, we're in the back.
00:09:39Hey.
00:09:40Um, I was wondering.
00:09:41We were throwing this party tomorrow night.
00:09:43It's for our birthday.
00:09:44Do you wanna come?
00:09:45Do you think he can see at my shore?
00:09:59Well, the house looks done.
00:10:01Tomorrow's the big day.
00:10:03We finally turn 18 and finally lose our virginity.
00:10:07Well, we better get our beady sleep
00:10:09because the party starts tomorrow at 2.
00:10:11So, OK, we know who Cheryl's going to do it with, Jake,
00:10:14and I'll probably do that guy Rod.
00:10:16But, Sue, who are you going to pick?
00:10:17To pop your chair?
00:10:19It's easy.
00:10:20I've known for the past six years, ever since catechism.
00:10:25What the fuck is catechism?
00:10:27I think it's a baby panda wrapped in peanut butter.
00:10:29Yeah.
00:10:31Oh, my soulmate.
00:10:38My soulmate.
00:10:40Chris?
00:10:41Sue, you might want to think about picking a backup.
00:10:47I mean...
00:10:48What?
00:10:49No, Chris is perfect.
00:10:50He played Jesus in Jesus Christ Superstar last year at camp.
00:10:53Plus, his name's Chris.
00:10:54It's a sign.
00:10:55Sue, the only sign is that Chris has a major case of gay face.
00:11:00What?
00:11:02He does not.
00:11:03Anyway, there's no such thing as gay face.
00:11:05He looks just like Justin Bieber with a little bit of Zac Efron
00:11:09and just a hint of Ryan Seacrest.
00:11:11Who the fuck's Ryan Seacrest?
00:11:14Look, Chris is my soulmate.
00:11:16OK, well, sweet dreams.
00:11:18Mm-hmm.
00:11:19See you in the morning.
00:11:27I knew it would happen someday.
00:11:28I just didn't expect it to happen so soon.
00:11:30Bye, snaku.
00:11:31Bye, nato.
00:11:34Unbelievable.
00:11:35Bye-bye.
00:11:35Bye, ma i t Nacht a night a little time.
00:11:37Bye, do you see my souls?
00:11:38A recipe Went toŠ°Š»Š° Hunter?
00:11:39Bye, would you like me to get me out a way?
00:11:40See you soon?
00:11:42Bye.
00:11:43Bye soon.
00:11:44Bye, le good, june.
00:11:46Bye,éØ.
00:11:51Bye, oh, my children.
00:11:53Bye.
00:11:54Bye, au l'es試at.
00:11:54Bye, aren't you?
00:11:54Bye, Farron.
00:11:55Bye, morning.
00:11:56Bye, yunw.
00:11:56Bye, l'esrefor.
00:11:57Bye.
00:11:58Bye, ugh.
00:11:59You're so perfect.
00:12:29You knew that's what I look like.
00:12:52Too bad no one could ever compare to you.
00:12:59Tomorrow's the day.
00:13:29Oh my gosh, they're coming.
00:13:33Lexi, Cheryl, hurry!
00:13:38Ew, why?
00:13:39It's for Jake to unwrap me.
00:13:41It's gonna be really sexy.
00:13:43I'm gonna start.
00:13:44You're gonna die of asphyxiation.
00:13:46He's gonna be really sexy.
00:13:47It's stupid.
00:13:48Just screw him.
00:13:49That's what he wants.
00:13:50That's what all guys want.
00:13:51Who hurt you as a child?
00:13:53Oh, Christ.
00:13:54Can I wrap your mouth, too?
00:13:55Anyway, what guys want is someone who's sexy,
00:13:59not someone they can just have sex with.
00:14:01You're an idiot.
00:14:02A very smooth, plastic-wrapped idiot.
00:14:06Guys, seriously, come on, hurry up.
00:14:08Oh, what a cool bracelet!
00:14:11I love it!
00:14:12Um...
00:14:13You should put that down, though,
00:14:14because it's, like, it's really...
00:14:15Very fragile.
00:14:16Yeah.
00:14:17Okay.
00:14:18Set it down.
00:14:19Hurry up.
00:14:20Those are your anal beads, right?
00:14:21Yeah.
00:14:22I thought so.
00:14:23What is this?
00:14:50Whoa!
00:14:51Whoa!
00:14:52Hold up.
00:14:54Oh, we're going to have some fun.
00:14:55Oh, Attack of the Wet t-shirts.
00:14:57Nice!
00:14:58Ha, ha, ha!
00:15:07Happy birthday, Lex.
00:15:09No, Joanna, we said no gifts.
00:15:12That is lip poison to plump your lips,
00:15:15but be careful it stings.
00:15:16And the other one is edible massage oil.
00:15:19Oh, how do you know?
00:15:21I mean, I'm going to use both of these tonight.
00:15:28Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
00:15:31Please don't touch my service time.
00:15:33All right.
00:15:34Sorry.
00:15:35Are you OK now?
00:15:36Yeah, I'm fine.
00:15:37OK.
00:15:38See you later.
00:15:40I can't believe you haven't heard of it.
00:15:42This is crazy.
00:15:43Oh.
00:15:44Jake.
00:15:45Hi.
00:15:46Hey, Ben.
00:15:47Happy birthday.
00:15:48Oh, you didn't have to give me anything.
00:15:52What?
00:15:53You want a beer?
00:15:57No.
00:16:01Oh, hon.
00:16:02Come here.
00:16:06I have your present here.
00:16:07I'll give it to you later when the time's right.
00:16:09Oh.
00:16:10You didn't have to give me anything.
00:16:12And I have a present for you that I want you to wrap later.
00:16:19Hey, Ralph.
00:16:20We need you to settle this bet over here real quick.
00:16:23We'll bet.
00:16:27All right.
00:16:28This is my man right here.
00:16:29Hey.
00:16:30How you doing?
00:16:31Good.
00:16:32How you doing?
00:16:33Good.
00:16:41Check it out!
00:16:43Dare me?
00:16:48Woo-hoo!
00:16:49Oh, dude.
00:16:50Look at those.
00:16:51Are those real?
00:16:52I don't...
00:16:53Have you guys seen Cheryl?
00:16:54Hey!
00:16:55Ah, dude!
00:16:56Move!
00:16:57Come on!
00:16:58Lame!
00:16:59Oh, all right.
00:17:00Okay.
00:17:01I'll see you guys later.
00:17:02Go do some push-ups or something.
00:17:03Aw, the moves.
00:17:0420 bucks says, by the end of the day, I will be motorboating those kitties.
00:17:05Yeah!
00:17:06They're fake anyways.
00:17:07Who cares?
00:17:08Okay.
00:17:09Oopsie-tay.
00:17:10Oh, dude, dude.
00:17:11I'm blind, you fucking asshole.
00:17:12Sue, no, it's your birthday.
00:17:13Here, let me.
00:17:14Joanna, no.
00:17:15I'm not.
00:17:16I'm not.
00:17:17I'm not.
00:17:18I'm not.
00:17:19I'm not.
00:17:20I'm not.
00:17:21I'm not.
00:17:22I'm not.
00:17:23I'm not.
00:17:24I'm not.
00:17:25I'm not.
00:17:26I'm not.
00:17:27I'm not.
00:17:28I'm not.
00:17:29I'm not.
00:17:30I'm not.
00:17:31I'm not.
00:17:32I'm not.
00:17:33I'm not.
00:17:34I'm not.
00:17:35I'm not.
00:17:36I'm not.
00:17:37I'm not.
00:17:38I'm not.
00:17:39I'm not.
00:17:40Hey, do my lips look any plumper?
00:17:42I put this stuff on, but I can't really feel anything yet.
00:17:45Have you guys seen Jake?
00:17:46I haven't seen him anywhere.
00:17:47He just, like, disappeared.
00:17:50Are these real?
00:18:03Of course they are.
00:18:05How come I haven't met you before?
00:18:08I don't know.
00:18:09Maybe he's gonna be around.
00:18:10Ryan, have you seen Jake?
00:18:11Have you seen Jake?
00:18:12Um, I think he's around or something.
00:18:15Maybe upstairs.
00:18:16I don't know.
00:18:17Oh.
00:18:18Maybe you want to go get my birthday present.
00:18:20That's probably where you went.
00:18:22Go roll.
00:18:25Liquid courage?
00:18:26Yeah.
00:18:27Mm-hmm.
00:18:28Atta girl.
00:18:32Vodka cranberry?
00:18:33It's really simple.
00:18:34Okay.
00:18:36Well, I guess it's now or never.
00:18:37I can go meet around.
00:18:40Sue?
00:18:41Are you okay?
00:18:42Sue?
00:18:43Relax.
00:18:45They're just guys.
00:18:46Okay.
00:18:47Nothing to be scared of.
00:18:48Seriously.
00:18:49It's gonna be fine.
00:18:50Is Chris here?
00:18:56Wow, it's even worse in person, isn't it?
00:18:58No.
00:18:59He does not have gay face.
00:19:01I'm gonna prove it to you.
00:19:02I'm gonna do it.
00:19:03I'm gonna do it.
00:19:08Wow, it's even worse in person, isn't it?
00:19:10No.
00:19:11He does not have gay face.
00:19:13I'm gonna prove it to you.
00:19:15I'm gonna do it.
00:19:16I'm gonna do this.
00:19:17Good luck.
00:19:21Hey, you can do this.
00:19:23Just act like a slut.
00:19:27Just pretend you're Lexi.
00:19:33Yeah, my favorite chapter is Sodom and Gomorrah.
00:19:40Chris.
00:19:41Hi.
00:19:43Can I talk to you?
00:19:44Uh-huh.
00:19:46In private?
00:19:47No.
00:19:48Oh.
00:20:01Hey, Lexi.
00:20:02Hey, Lexi.
00:20:03What?
00:20:04Chris.
00:20:05You're so sexy.
00:20:06Ever since you played Jesus at camp, I've just...
00:20:11I've known that we were meant to be together.
00:20:14And I really want to...
00:20:17Oh!
00:20:18What are you doing?
00:20:19Is that wrong?
00:20:20Sue!
00:20:21What's gotten into you?
00:20:22Nothing.
00:20:23I'm sorry.
00:20:24I don't know how to do this.
00:20:25Sue.
00:20:27Sue.
00:20:28Sue.
00:20:29Sue.
00:20:31I understand these urges.
00:20:34And, you know, I like you too.
00:20:38Really?
00:20:39You do?
00:20:40I do.
00:20:41I really do.
00:20:43I like you too.
00:20:44Really?
00:20:45You do?
00:20:46I do.
00:20:47I really do.
00:20:48It's just...
00:20:50I've devoted a lot of my life to one certain man.
00:20:55Right.
00:20:56Lexi said you were...
00:20:57Jesus.
00:20:58Oh.
00:20:59That man.
00:21:00Of course.
00:21:01What did you think?
00:21:02Oh, nothing.
00:21:04So we can still do this then?
00:21:07Sue.
00:21:09You know, for me, when I think about that man,
00:21:15who died for our sins, when I think about him,
00:21:19up there on that cross,
00:21:21so helpless, yet so muscular,
00:21:26with his strong thighs crossed over each other
00:21:31so delicately beneath that ragged loin cloth,
00:21:37growing so hot, so sweaty, under that hot,
00:21:42hot sun.
00:21:44And I just feel such compassion.
00:21:47I think about those things too.
00:21:49So you understand why I can't do this?
00:21:53Not really.
00:21:54I just find it too hard it is to give in to carnal pleasure
00:22:00when he sacrificed so much for us.
00:22:04So...
00:22:05We're going to go out there, right?
00:22:06Andy, we're going to totally throw these on.
00:22:07Hey, Ty.
00:22:08Whoa!
00:22:09Have you seen Jake?
00:22:10Uh, no.
00:22:11No.
00:22:12No.
00:22:13All right.
00:22:14Okay.
00:22:15All right.
00:22:16Focus.
00:22:17Focus.
00:22:18Focus.
00:22:19Focus.
00:22:20Focus.
00:22:21Focus.
00:22:22Focus.
00:22:23Focus.
00:22:24Oh, there he is.
00:22:26Oh, he got me the puppy that I wanted.
00:22:30Oh, there he is.
00:22:37Oh, he got me the puppy that I wanted.
00:22:55How could he?
00:23:00Sue, what happened? Did you guys do it?
00:23:03Sue?
00:23:04He doesn't want me.
00:23:06Because he's gay.
00:23:08No, he's not. He just really loves Jesus.
00:23:11Oh, come on, Sue.
00:23:13The only reason we even liked him is because you knew he was never a real possibility for you.
00:23:17Look, the only way you are going to find out what kind of man you really want
00:23:22is to know what kind of woman you really are, deep inside.
00:23:27What?
00:23:28Come with me.
00:23:29Where?
00:23:30To meet your dark side.
00:23:38Out.
00:23:39Everyone out.
00:23:49Sue, it's time for you and your vagina to meet face to face.
00:23:54I really can't. I really don't think I can do this.
00:24:09I'm not letting you out until you look.
00:24:14I'm not letting you out until you look.
00:24:16Sue?
00:24:17Can you see it?
00:24:21Sue?
00:24:22I'm almost... I'm almost there.
00:24:26What?
00:24:27What?
00:24:28Sue, what happened? What did you see?
00:24:29A raccoon?
00:24:30What?
00:24:31What?
00:24:32Sue, what happened? What did you see?
00:24:34A raccoon?
00:24:35What?
00:24:36You overshot it.
00:24:37Aim the mirror further up.
00:24:38I can't.
00:24:39I can't.
00:24:40Please don't make me do that again.
00:24:41Okay.
00:24:42Fine.
00:24:43Fine.
00:24:44Fine.
00:24:45I didn't want to do this, but you leave me no choice.
00:24:47What?
00:24:48You really need an orgasm.
00:24:49Honestly, I don't know how you expected to ever have sex with someone else when you've
00:24:50never even had it with yourself.
00:24:51This really has to be your first step.
00:24:52Lex, I'm waiting.
00:24:53Coming.
00:24:54Sue, my black vibrator is somewhere in the top drawer.
00:24:55Just find it and use it.
00:24:56Wait.
00:24:57What does the black vibrator look like?
00:24:59It's black.
00:25:00It's black.
00:25:01It's black.
00:25:02It's black.
00:25:03It's black.
00:25:04It's black.
00:25:05It's black.
00:25:06It's black.
00:25:07It's black.
00:25:08It's black.
00:25:09It's black.
00:25:10It's black.
00:25:11It's black.
00:25:12I can't.
00:25:13I can't.
00:25:14Please don't make me do that again.
00:25:15Please don't make me do that again.
00:25:16Okay.
00:25:17Fine.
00:25:18Fine.
00:25:19I didn't want to do this, but you leave me no choice.
00:25:21It's black.
00:25:22It vibrates.
00:25:23Come on, Rod.
00:25:25Let's go to Sue's room.
00:25:28And don't come back until you have at least one orgasm.
00:25:42Hey, cutie!
00:25:43Cutie!
00:25:48Boozeye!
00:25:50Oh, yeah!
00:25:51Bang!
00:25:52Bang!
00:25:53Bang!
00:25:54Bang!
00:25:55Good boy.
00:25:56Straighten up.
00:25:57Good boy.
00:25:58Good boy.
00:25:59He knows over a hundred commands.
00:26:00I'm sorry I can't see anything.
00:26:01That is not funny, Cheryl.
00:26:02What a bitch.
00:26:03Fortunately, when you're blind, you get used to things like that.
00:26:05I'm sorry I can't see anything.
00:26:06I'm sorry I can't see anything.
00:26:07That is not funny, Cheryl.
00:26:08What a bitch.
00:26:09Fortunately, when you're blind, you get used to things like that.
00:26:12Ah!
00:26:13Ah!
00:26:14Ah!
00:26:15Ah!
00:26:16Ah!
00:26:17Ah!
00:26:18Ah!
00:26:19Ah!
00:26:20Ah!
00:26:21Ah!
00:26:22Ah!
00:26:23Ah!
00:26:24Ah!
00:26:25Ah!
00:26:27Oh, shit!
00:26:28Oh, shit.
00:26:43What's wrong with this thing?
00:26:58Cheryl, what is wrong?
00:27:09Lexi, it's Jake.
00:27:12He was getting a blowjob by some pink-haired girl.
00:27:15For sure?
00:27:17I mean, I know I've been putting off having sex with him,
00:27:19so maybe it's my fault.
00:27:20That's no excuse.
00:27:22He's a dirtbag.
00:27:23How dare he?
00:27:24No, it's awful.
00:27:25I mean, I thought I was going to marry him.
00:27:29It's a text.
00:27:34It's from him.
00:27:35I can't bear myself to read it.
00:27:36OK.
00:27:37He's looking for you.
00:27:39He wants to give you your birthday gift.
00:27:41Oh, I can't face him.
00:27:43I have to go.
00:27:44I'm going.
00:27:45No, you can't just leave.
00:27:46Well, I can't stay and just pretend like nothing happened.
00:27:49I mean, maybe I should confront him.
00:27:51I know.
00:27:52He'll either deny it or admit and promise never to do it again.
00:27:54Either way, it's bullshit.
00:27:56I see only one option.
00:27:59I'm leaving.
00:28:00Revenge sex.
00:28:01Re...
00:28:02I mean, what?
00:28:03What does that even mean?
00:28:04It means you find a guy, you screw his brains out,
00:28:06and you let Jake catch you.
00:28:10Revenge sex.
00:28:12Re...
00:28:13I mean, what?
00:28:14What does that even mean?
00:28:15It means you find a guy, you screw his brains out,
00:28:17and you let Jake catch you.
00:28:19But he...
00:28:20I mean, he doesn't even care.
00:28:21He doesn't even care about me.
00:28:22I mean, why would...
00:28:23He's just into other girls.
00:28:24Trust me.
00:28:25He'll care.
00:28:26Seriously, this is the worst thing you could do to him.
00:28:29To his ego.
00:28:30To screw someone else when you've never even had sex with him.
00:28:34Especially if it's with someone smarter, better looking, and with a bigger dick.
00:28:38No, I...
00:28:40I couldn't.
00:28:41Plus, I mean, there's...
00:28:42There's no one smarter and better looking.
00:28:45Eric!
00:28:46He's perfect!
00:28:47Eric Hall?
00:28:48Are you kidding?
00:28:49I mean, he wouldn't even be into me.
00:28:52He likes your type.
00:28:53Really?
00:28:54And what type is that?
00:28:55Slutty.
00:28:57Yeah.
00:28:58Trust me, he's amazing.
00:28:59I fooled around with him once.
00:29:00He has this great tongue ring.
00:29:02Oh, no.
00:29:03I could never fool around with somebody you fooled around with.
00:29:06Okay, then.
00:29:07Fine.
00:29:08I'll find someone else.
00:29:09Someone that I haven't fooled around with.
00:29:15Okay, what does it matter that I fooled around with him?
00:29:18I mean, it's like you're not going to marry the guy.
00:29:20No, I just couldn't do it.
00:29:22Fine.
00:29:23If you want to live the rest of your life knowing that you had one chance to do the right thing,
00:29:27to make your boyfriend feel like a total worthless piece of garbage,
00:29:30and possibly even scar him with the rest of his existence, and you chose not to do it,
00:29:34go ahead.
00:29:35Okay.
00:29:36But honestly, I don't know how you'll be able to live with yourself.
00:29:38I don't know.
00:29:39But honestly, I don't know how you'll be able to live with yourself.
00:29:40I don't know.
00:29:41Trust me.
00:29:42It's going to work.
00:29:43I will intercept Jake and get him upstairs.
00:29:47Hi, Cheryl.
00:29:48You're okay enough to chat with her.
00:29:49Oh, no.
00:29:50Oh, no.
00:29:51Oh, no.
00:29:52Hey.
00:29:53Happy birthday.
00:29:54Thanks.
00:29:55Thanks.
00:29:56Thanks.
00:29:57Thanks.
00:29:58Hi, Cheryl.
00:29:59Hi, Cheryl.
00:30:00You're okay enough to chat with her.
00:30:01Oh, no.
00:30:14Hey.
00:30:15Happy birthday.
00:30:17Hi.
00:30:18Thanks.
00:30:19Have you guys seen Jake?
00:30:24So, happy birthday.
00:30:25Uh, do you know that most people think that the happy birthday song was a good song?
00:30:29Have you guys seen Jake?
00:30:46So, happy birthday.
00:30:52Do you know that most people think that the happy birthday song was from Britain, but it's actually from us, U.S.
00:30:59America?
00:31:00United States?
00:31:03I know where we live.
00:31:04Right.
00:31:05Of course.
00:31:09I know where we live.
00:31:11Right.
00:31:12Of course.
00:31:17Hey, Jesus, Erica, are you going to make your move or not?
00:31:20Oh, you want me to move?
00:31:21Yeah, no, I can totally move, I just...
00:31:22No, you're fine.
00:31:24Jake!
00:31:25So, Eric, do you want to do it or not?
00:31:29So, Eric, do you want to do it or not?
00:31:40Oh, I'm sorry, it?
00:31:43What, um...
00:31:44It, like monkey boning and, like, pigs in a blanket get real nasty.
00:31:52Oh, oh, you mean, like, uh, right now?
00:31:57I mean, well, yeah, you know, the sooner the better.
00:32:00Yeah, sure, I mean, well, yeah, of course.
00:32:04Um, I just never realized that you...
00:32:07I mean, whew, uh, it's just, you're so, you're so beautiful.
00:32:19Okay, um, no Cassine.
00:32:23Right, um, of course.
00:32:26Sorry.
00:32:26So, um, do you want to unwrap me?
00:32:34Oh, wow, uh, you're wrapped up like a Hot Pocket or a leftover macaroni and cheese.
00:32:39Now that you're left over, you're not.
00:32:41You, uh, you're fresh.
00:32:45Now that you're left over, you're not.
00:32:47You, uh, you're fresh.
00:32:50Organic.
00:32:51Yep.
00:32:54So, the wrap.
00:32:55Right.
00:32:56Um, where's the, uh...
00:32:59It's, uh, the end is, that I just, like, right over here.
00:33:01Oh, oh, yeah, here it is.
00:33:02Yeah.
00:33:02That's where I see it.
00:33:03Um, let me just, uh...
00:33:05Ow, ow, ow.
00:33:08Sorry, sorry, I, um...
00:33:10It's, it's okay.
00:33:11Do it again.
00:33:14Sorry, I, uh, I bite my nails, so it's a little difficult.
00:33:17You know what?
00:33:17Let me just lay on the bed.
00:33:20Okay.
00:33:21Uh, let me just see.
00:33:29Oh, here it is.
00:33:30I got it.
00:33:31All right.
00:33:31Just, um, pull it.
00:33:33Let me just...
00:33:34Oh, jeez.
00:33:37Uh, Cheryl, are you...
00:33:38Are you okay?
00:33:40Help me.
00:33:40Help.
00:33:41Uh...
00:33:41Hey, Cheryl, are you okay?
00:33:45Oh, jeez.
00:33:52Well, that was stupid.
00:33:57Yeah.
00:34:03How you doing tonight?
00:34:04I'm good.
00:34:05You having a good time?
00:34:06Yeah?
00:34:07You good?
00:34:07Jake!
00:34:08I think I saw Cheryl upstairs.
00:34:11What?
00:34:12I can't hear you.
00:34:14Another beer.
00:34:15Chips are so damn salty.
00:34:17Jake!
00:34:17So angry.
00:34:18Upstairs.
00:34:20Yeah.
00:34:20Hold on.
00:34:21Take a piss.
00:34:23How much beer?
00:34:24Oh.
00:34:38Oh.
00:34:38Oh.
00:34:38Oh.
00:34:39Oh.
00:34:41Oh.
00:34:43Oh.
00:34:44Oh.
00:34:51Finally.
00:34:53I, uh...
00:34:53Let me just get the blinds.
00:34:56Oh, no, no, no.
00:34:57No, no, no.
00:34:58Um, don't worry about it.
00:35:00What?
00:35:01I mean, I want us to be able to see each other.
00:35:05Oh.
00:35:07Well, okay.
00:35:08Okay.
00:35:08I want us to be able to see each other.
00:35:34Oh.
00:35:35Oh.
00:35:37Well, okay.
00:35:39Okay.
00:35:39Okay.
00:35:40Hmm.
00:36:10What are you doing?
00:36:25Uh, I think it's time, you know, to do it.
00:36:32Um, not yet.
00:36:34More foreplay.
00:36:35Huh?
00:36:35Oh.
00:36:37It's so good.
00:36:44Huh?
00:36:46Yep.
00:36:47Oh, my god.
00:36:49Jaw, jaw, jaw.
00:36:50What?
00:36:51What?
00:36:52Ah, ah, oh.
00:36:54Ah, dear.
00:36:55Lock jaw, lock jaw.
00:36:57Wait, is that even a thing?
00:36:59I don't know.
00:37:01Ah.
00:37:02Are you OK?
00:37:03No, no, no, no, no, it's, uh, it's fine.
00:37:08I'm just, uh, embarrassed.
00:37:11It's probably TMJ or fracture or swollen.
00:37:17Are you sure you're OK?
00:37:19Yeah, yeah, I'm fine.
00:37:21OK, great.
00:37:21Have fun.
00:37:22Oh.
00:37:23Ah.
00:37:28Now, now, let's do it now.
00:37:30No, not yet, not yet.
00:37:34I'm going to come.
00:37:35I'm going to come.
00:37:36Are you ready?
00:37:37No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:37:39No, no, no, not yet.
00:37:40Lexi!
00:37:41Lexi!
00:37:42Oh, shit!
00:37:43Oh.
00:37:46No, no, no, not yet.
00:37:48Lexi!
00:37:48Oh, shit!
00:37:50Oh.
00:37:51Oh, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It's been a really long time and I just I haven't been masturbating for anything
00:38:05Oh, hey Jake
00:38:06How are you doing?
00:38:10How's it going?
00:38:11Good
00:38:11Eric?
00:38:13Eric, help me. I'm glad I can't see anything
00:38:16Excuse me
00:38:21Cheryl's in here
00:38:27Sup, bro
00:38:29What the fuck is...
00:38:31Hey, wait
00:38:34Lex, Meg, still waiting
00:38:42Oh, I'm sorry. I can't see. I'm blind
00:38:46Damn it. I'm gonna save somebody to that bitch
00:38:49Hey, you
00:38:51You better stop making fun of the blind or I'm gonna teach you a lesson
00:38:55Help
00:38:57I'm so sorry
00:38:59I'll never make fun of the blind again
00:39:01Help
00:39:03Help
00:39:05Help
00:39:07Help
00:39:09Help
00:39:11Help
00:39:13Help
00:39:15Help
00:39:17Help
00:39:19Help
00:39:19Help
00:39:20Help
00:39:20Help
00:39:21Help
00:39:21Help
00:39:22Help
00:39:22Help
00:39:23Oh, man, no more water balloons
00:39:27This party's ass
00:39:29Yeah
00:39:33This just isn't working on it
00:39:37Nothing
00:39:39What's the big deal about these vibrators anyway?
00:39:41What's the big deal about these vibrators anyway?
00:39:43Oh
00:39:45Be careful, man. The lock sticks
00:39:47Spark it up
00:39:49Yes!
00:39:51Oh, man! I love this game
00:39:55We're in the controllers. We gotta play here, here, here, here
00:39:57Okay, let me find another one
00:39:59All right, come on, come on
00:40:01Whoa
00:40:03Look at this
00:40:05Look at this
00:40:07Oh, man
00:40:09Get that thing away, Jesus
00:40:11Hey, dude, nice shot
00:40:19Wasn't me
00:40:21Whoa
00:40:25Whoa
00:40:26Whoa
00:40:27Nice
00:40:28Are you sitting on there or something?
00:40:30Hey, you found the grenade launcher
00:40:33Nice
00:40:34Nice
00:40:46Do you have the extra controller?
00:40:48Oh, man
00:40:49Hey, you found the controller
00:40:50Whoa
00:40:54Whoa
00:40:55You are the controller
00:40:56Whoa
00:40:57I just
00:40:58You are the controller
00:41:02No, I just
00:41:03I didn't
00:41:04I swear
00:41:05I
00:41:06No problem
00:41:08No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no
00:41:09Whoa
00:41:14Look at this
00:41:15This one's right
00:41:16All right, all right.
00:41:17Hey, don't leave.
00:41:18Hey, Sue.
00:41:19What are you going, man?
00:41:22It's all right.
00:41:23Um, hey, Sue.
00:41:34Hey, didn't you hear me calling you?
00:41:36Yeah, I just needed to, um.
00:41:39Oh, sure.
00:41:41Listen, Sue, I was rethinking what I said earlier.
00:41:46You were?
00:41:48You mean...
00:41:50Yeah.
00:41:53So you think we should give it a try?
00:41:57Could we go get a drink?
00:42:01Wow, um, your toilet's really...
00:42:05You know what, I gotta go.
00:42:08Um, happy birthday.
00:42:09Uh, no, Chris, no, that wasn't, I didn't...
00:42:12Oh, God, never mind.
00:42:16This is the worst idea ever.
00:42:27Never going to have sex.
00:42:29Ow.
00:42:30Ow.
00:42:49Hello?
00:42:50A little attention here.
00:42:52Oh, yeah.
00:42:53Sorry.
00:42:59Lex, don't be selfish.
00:43:01Oh, right.
00:43:02Sorry.
00:43:03Sorry.
00:43:15Ugh.
00:43:16Jeez.
00:43:17Who invented this stupid position, anyway?
00:43:20Too much fucking multitasking.
00:43:22Yeah?
00:43:23I'm embarrassed to kill her.
00:43:24Okay, she's a man.
00:43:25I can't see her, she's a man, she's a man.
00:43:26All right, she's a man.
00:43:27She's a man.
00:43:28It's a woman, man.
00:43:29To me, man, she's a man.
00:43:30You're my laughing.
00:43:31And her having to do something.
00:43:32Screw it.
00:43:33Alright, she's a woman.
00:43:34I can't see her.
00:43:35Do something.
00:43:36What'd she say?
00:43:37I mean, I'm not gonna try to ride her.
00:43:38I'm gonna try to ride her.
00:43:39I'll do a ride.
00:43:40No, no, no, no, no, no.
00:43:41No, that was bad.
00:44:05That was so bad.
00:44:11Joanna, do you know a guy named JJ?
00:44:25I think that guy's name starts with a J. Hey, does your name start with a J?
00:44:34Yes, it does.
00:44:36So you're JJ?
00:44:38Yes, I'm completely concerned.
00:44:42Come and freeze at the...
00:44:44Hello. Welcome to 1-900-CONFESS. Would you like a priest or a nun today?
00:44:52A nun.
00:44:54Please punch in your credit card number.
00:44:56Please hold.
00:44:58Oh my goodness.
00:45:001-900-CONFESS, how may I be of service?
00:45:021-900-CONFESS, how may I be of service?
00:45:04It's been one day since my last confession. I accuse myself of the following sins.
00:45:08One day?
00:45:09Ow!
00:45:10Is that too long?
00:45:11I would have come this morning, but it's my 18th birthday.
00:45:13Go on.
00:45:14Uh, okay, well, I've been touching myself.
00:45:17Inappropriately.
00:45:18Well, actually, I didn't.
00:45:19Oh, a washing machine.
00:45:20What's her problem?
00:45:21What's her problem?
00:45:22A washing machine touched her.
00:45:23Your mom is the lying machine.
00:45:24It's like, oh yeah.
00:45:25Oh, you're trying to do something with this?
00:45:26It's been one day since my last confession.
00:45:27I accuse myself of the following sins.
00:45:28One day?
00:45:28Ow!
00:45:29I wha...
00:45:30Is that too long?
00:45:31I would have come this morning, but it's my 18th birthday.
00:45:34Go on.
00:45:35Uh, okay, well, I've been touching myself...Inappropriately.
00:45:37Oh, no.
00:45:38You're not even kidding.
00:45:39Go on.
00:45:40Well, actually, I didn't know.
00:45:41Oh, a washing machine.
00:45:45What's her problem?
00:45:47A washing machine touched her.
00:45:49Well, you know, I sat on a washing machine and, well.
00:45:54All right, freak, time's up.
00:45:56What?
00:45:57But what do I do?
00:45:58Just unplug the thing.
00:45:59No, but I think I might have had an orgasm.
00:46:03Well, then be happy.
00:46:05You found the perfect man.
00:46:06I'm serious.
00:46:07Look, honey, you seem like a nice young lady, so I'll
00:46:12tell you this.
00:46:13Masturbation isn't a sin.
00:46:16No contritions?
00:46:18You broke no covenant with God.
00:46:19It's not in the Bible.
00:46:21So the washing machine could touch me anytime?
00:46:25Like morning, afternoon, night?
00:46:28Yes, and other things can touch you.
00:46:30Accidental masturbation is not a sin.
00:46:33Neither is intentional masturbation.
00:46:36Huh.
00:46:37God's pretty cool that way.
00:46:39He sure is.
00:46:40Now run along.
00:46:44Wow.
00:46:45How do you know all that?
00:46:48Because I'm a nun.
00:46:49Now eat my pussy, bitch.
00:46:52Huh.
00:46:52Accidental masturbation.
00:46:54Who'da think?
00:47:04Revenge sex, what a stupid fucking idea.
00:47:07God, I'm getting out of here.
00:47:11Yeah, admit it.
00:47:12I've got no game.
00:47:14I guess I just get everything I guess so I'm a beautiful man.
00:47:20Fucking douchebag.
00:47:22Damn it.
00:47:24Now I have to get laid if it's the last thing I do.
00:47:26You go, girl.
00:47:28What?
00:47:31What are you doing here?
00:47:33We needed someplace private.
00:47:35But hey, listen.
00:47:36If you're serious about getting laid.
00:47:37Yeah.
00:47:38If you want someone great.
00:47:40I mean, really, the best ever.
00:47:44No offense.
00:47:46Frank, the blind guy?
00:47:48Really?
00:47:49I'm telling you, he's amazing.
00:47:52I had food sex with him a few weeks ago.
00:47:54It was like nothing I've ever experienced before.
00:47:58It was like we used all our senses, everything.
00:48:03If you're interested, I'll set it up.
00:48:07All right.
00:48:14What about him?
00:48:15Jeremy.
00:48:16Oh, yeah, I know Jeremy.
00:48:18Hey, I think I fooled around with him once.
00:48:20I didn't know his last name, though.
00:48:23It's Jones.
00:48:25Jeremy Jones.
00:48:26This all makes sense.
00:48:28Excuse me.
00:48:30Jeremy.
00:48:31Hi.
00:48:32Hey.
00:48:33Who's on the phone?
00:48:34Oh, that's my new girlfriend.
00:48:36You'll meet her.
00:48:37She'll be here in like an hour.
00:48:38Wait, you have a girlfriend?
00:48:53Oh.
00:48:55Hey, Frank.
00:48:56Sit.
00:49:00Oh, you meant, you meant the dog.
00:49:05Relax.
00:49:07You need to relax and calm down.
00:49:18Oh, I'm, I'm relaxed.
00:49:20I'm fine.
00:49:21Why are you biting your nail?
00:49:22Why are you biting your nail?
00:49:23I'm not.
00:49:26How did you know that?
00:49:30Corner.
00:49:34Sit.
00:49:36Roll over.
00:49:37I shouldn't even be doing this, but...
00:49:37I shouldn't even be doing this, but...
00:49:46I shouldn't even be doing this, but...
00:49:49I'm considering it a teachable moment.
00:50:03Okay.
00:50:03Oh.
00:50:04Oh.
00:50:05Oh.
00:50:06I shouldn't even be doing this, but considering it a teachable moment.
00:50:08A teachable moment.
00:50:09Okay.
00:50:13Oh.
00:50:14See me with your hands.
00:50:16See me with your hands.
00:50:21All right.
00:50:22Uh...
00:50:29You know, I should really...
00:50:30I have a boyfriend and I shouldn't be doing this.
00:50:32It's...
00:50:33Really.
00:50:37Oh.
00:50:46Mmm.
00:50:46Peanut butter.
00:51:02Great.
00:51:02Frank.
00:51:03Oh.
00:51:07Oh, Frank.
00:51:08Oh, man...
00:51:09Look, give me a chip.
00:51:13My chips, old boy.
00:51:14Oh, give me a chip, man.
00:51:18My chips, old boy.
00:51:18So, give me a chip, man.
00:51:19My chips, old boy.
00:51:20Look, give me a chip.
00:51:21You know what, ma'am?
00:51:33Dude, give me two.
00:51:34My chips, homeboy.
00:51:36Dude, give me two, ma'am.
00:51:37My chips.
00:51:38Dude, my chips.
00:51:39Dude, give me two.
00:51:41My chips?
00:51:43Guys, why are you making such a mess?
00:51:46Sorry.
00:51:51It's just a case of accidental masturbation.
00:51:57That's all.
00:52:01Come on, let me do this.
00:52:02Go away.
00:52:03I got it.
00:52:04No, really, please.
00:52:05I want to go.
00:52:09Okay, everybody out.
00:52:11Leave.
00:52:12I have to back you.
00:52:21You're not even getting the chips.
00:52:27They're over here.
00:52:29I see some dust over here, so...
00:52:32It's just so much dust on this floor.
00:52:38It's a dirty floor.
00:52:40It's such a dirty, dirty floor.
00:52:44I think I got all that.
00:53:07I'm just going to see how home.
00:53:10Frankie.
00:53:21Oh, my...
00:53:22What was that?
00:53:23What?
00:53:24Ow, fucking shit.
00:53:26Man, we got to smoke.
00:53:27Oh, we can smoke in here.
00:53:30Stop.
00:53:31Frank, stop teasing Frank.
00:53:33Oh, shit.
00:53:35I'm sorry, man.
00:53:36We're just looking for a place to finish this roach.
00:53:38All right, I heard something.
00:53:39You want to join us?
00:53:40Uh, no, I might...
00:53:41Come on, you got to do it.
00:53:43Come on.
00:53:44Seriously, guys.
00:53:44I need to...
00:53:45What's your dog, man?
00:53:45Dude, what's it like being blinded?
00:53:47It's tripping.
00:53:52Frank?
00:53:53Frank, are we going to do something soon?
00:53:58Bro, you are too funny.
00:54:02Thanks, man.
00:54:03Oh, this is some good stuff.
00:54:05I haven't smoked since junior high.
00:54:06Dude, I haven't stopped smoking since junior high.
00:54:09Wait, wait, wait.
00:54:10I feel like I was supposed to be doing something.
00:54:14Damn, I really can't remember.
00:54:16This is some good shit.
00:54:17Oh, no.
00:54:24You're the devil.
00:54:37No more.
00:54:39JJ, Jeremy, you have to remember that amazing time we had together, don't you?
00:54:48Please.
00:54:49Lex, I can't.
00:54:51I mean, I got a girlfriend.
00:54:53I really like this girl.
00:54:55Fine.
00:54:55It's just so sad because I'm wearing this coupless bra and I also have on crotchless panties with just a little string of pearl in front for extra stimulation.
00:55:09We've got like 30 minutes before she gets here.
00:55:16Perfect.
00:55:21Before she gets here.
00:55:22Perfect.
00:55:23Let's do it.
00:55:35Let's do it.
00:55:35Fuck me.
00:55:36Fuck me now.
00:55:41What?
00:55:42What's wrong?
00:55:43I can't get it in.
00:55:46Just fly down there.
00:55:47It's like desert down there.
00:55:49It's sandpaper.
00:55:51Okay, I get the picture.
00:55:53Just try it again.
00:55:56No.
00:55:57Why is this happening?
00:55:59We fooled around before.
00:56:01I was dripping wet.
00:56:02I came like four times, remember?
00:56:04Just do what you did then.
00:56:05Go on.
00:56:06I already did my thing.
00:56:07I already tried.
00:56:09What?
00:56:10What is different this time?
00:56:12I don't know.
00:56:14Last time, I honestly don't even know what you're talking about.
00:56:20What?
00:56:22You're not JJ?
00:56:24But your name is Jeremy Jones.
00:56:26How can you not be JJ?
00:56:28Who the hell is this JJ?
00:56:31Where are you going?
00:56:32We're not done here.
00:56:34I can still do this.
00:56:35I just need a little bit of foreplay.
00:56:36I can do this.
00:56:37I don't need JJ.
00:56:39I don't need anyone else.
00:56:40We can do this.
00:56:42Go team.
00:56:47What?
00:56:47Just keep going.
00:56:54Shit.
00:56:54Where's Jeremy?
00:57:07We were just, you know.
00:57:10Hey, babe.
00:57:11Just working out.
00:57:16How could you?
00:57:17You bastard.
00:57:18You might want to...
00:57:22What?
00:57:23What?
00:57:24What?
00:57:29Mariela!
00:57:30Mariela!
00:57:31You know, those are mine.
00:57:34At least not all of them.
00:57:36What is wrong with you?
00:57:38What is wrong with you?
00:57:44You used to be so pure.
00:57:46Well, no more.
00:57:47That's it.
00:57:49Really, that's the last one.
00:57:50What?
00:57:59Come on.
00:58:01Oh, man.
00:58:02Cheryl?
00:58:07What is it?
00:58:11What are you doing down here?
00:58:16Waiting for everyone to leave so I can sneak out and get far, far away from here.
00:58:31What?
00:58:32Why?
00:58:33Nothing.
00:58:34Just this lying guy and his dog.
00:58:37Honey, it's going to be okay.
00:58:40No, it's not okay.
00:58:42God.
00:58:44And you know whose fault it is?
00:58:46I'm sorry.
00:58:47It's Jake's.
00:58:48Jake's fault.
00:58:49That lying, cheating bastard.
00:58:51Yes.
00:58:52He is such a dickwad.
00:58:54You need to confront him.
00:58:55Yeah.
00:58:56Yeah, I need to confront him.
00:58:58I mean, it's my birthday and where is he anyway?
00:59:01Like, why isn't he hanging out with me?
00:59:03You know, you just call him here and give him a big piece of your mind.
00:59:06Yeah, a big piece.
00:59:07A big old chunk of my mind.
00:59:09A big piece of it.
00:59:10Yeah.
00:59:11You know, you might want to...
00:59:14You need to look hot while you break up with him.
00:59:16Yeah, you're right.
00:59:17Why am I wearing a sheet?
00:59:19No.
00:59:20No.
00:59:26I'm sorry.
00:59:27I'm sorry.
00:59:28I get shy around beautiful women like you.
00:59:34I got no game.
00:59:41It's not important.
00:59:50Hey, um...
00:59:51Eric, I can't talk right now.
00:59:56No, no, no.
00:59:57I really need to talk to you.
00:59:58Really, Eric, I can't right now, so...
01:00:01No, no, no.
01:00:02I just wanted to say I'm sorry about earlier.
01:00:04And I'm just embarrassed.
01:00:06And I want to make it up to you.
01:00:07Eric, really?
01:00:09I don't care.
01:00:10It's fine.
01:00:11No, but I do.
01:00:12I mean, I do.
01:00:13I care.
01:00:15I haven't known how to tell you.
01:00:17Maybe because, I don't know, I'm a little shy.
01:00:19But I was wondering, or hoping, that we could go out sometime.
01:00:25Soon.
01:00:26Because I'm going to be leaving for a little while,
01:00:28and it would be nice to go out.
01:00:30Really?
01:00:31Eric, you're shy.
01:00:32You have no game.
01:00:34No, not really.
01:00:36Yeah, no, I can't do this.
01:00:39Sorry.
01:00:43Okay.
01:00:44All right.
01:00:45I, uh...
01:00:49Happy birthday, then.
01:01:01Oh, I'm sorry.
01:01:02I was trying to kiss you.
01:01:03Oh.
01:01:04Here I come, baby.
01:01:05Get ready for your big birthday surprise.
01:01:16Oh.
01:01:17Eric, stop.
01:01:18Um, we can't do this.
01:01:19I'm sorry.
01:01:20Oh, God damn it.
01:01:21Not again.
01:01:22Oh, no.
01:01:23I'm sorry.
01:01:24Honey, happy...
01:01:25The fuck is this?
01:01:26Who the hell are you, dude?
01:01:27Okay.
01:01:28Guys, don't.
01:01:29Cheryl.
01:01:30Baby, what is this?
01:01:31Oh, gee, Cheryl.
01:01:32I've been looking for you all night, and you've been...
01:01:34Oh, man, no wonder I couldn't find you.
01:01:35You couldn't find me?
01:01:36Oh, what about all those girls' vaginas you were in, or your penis getting sucked?
01:01:37Cheryl, honey.
01:01:38I've been looking for you all night, and you've been...
01:01:39Oh, man, no wonder I couldn't find you.
01:01:40You couldn't find me?
01:01:41Oh, what about all those girls' vaginas you were in, or your penis getting sucked?
01:01:42Cheryl, honey.
01:01:43No, no.
01:01:44We can work this out.
01:01:45Baby, I love you.
01:01:46Jake, no.
01:01:47You have to go.
01:01:48Baby, I'll be faithful for not to be here.
01:01:49No, no.
01:01:50No, no, no.
01:01:51I'm sorry.
01:01:52Guys, don't.
01:01:53Cheryl, baby, what is this?
01:01:54Oh, gee, Cheryl.
01:01:55You're...
01:01:56I've been looking for you all night, and you've been...
01:01:57Oh, man, no wonder I couldn't find you.
01:01:58You couldn't find me?
01:02:00What about all those girls' vaginas you were in, or your penis getting sucked?
01:02:05Cheryl, honey.
01:02:06No, no.
01:02:07We can work this out.
01:02:08Baby, I love you.
01:02:09Jake, no.
01:02:10You have to go.
01:02:11Baby, I'll be faithful from now on.
01:02:12Please.
01:02:13I promise.
01:02:14No, Jake.
01:02:15I can't do this.
01:02:16I'm sorry.
01:02:17Cheryl, come on.
01:02:18No.
01:02:19Jake, please.
01:02:20Just go.
01:02:21I'm sorry.
01:02:22You're a heartless bitch!
01:02:23How can you do...
01:02:24Yay!
01:02:25You did it.
01:02:26I am so proud of you.
01:02:27You got your revenge sex.
01:02:28You left him in your shell of a man.
01:02:30Oh.
01:02:31Revenge sex?
01:02:32It's really not what it sounds like at all.
01:02:36Right.
01:02:37That all makes sense now.
01:02:40Wow.
01:02:41I feel really stupid.
01:02:43Eric, I'm really...
01:02:44I'm really sorry.
01:02:46Cheryl, I really liked you.
01:02:49And you used me.
01:02:51Eric, please don't go.
01:02:53Please, Eric!
01:02:54Aren't you happy?
01:02:57Well, no.
01:02:58That's not exactly how it's supposed to feel like.
01:03:01You mean the sex?
01:03:02Was it...
01:03:03Yeah?
01:03:04No, we didn't quite do it.
01:03:06Oh.
01:03:07You know, I couldn't seem to do it either.
01:03:08Really?
01:03:09I just never found the right guy.
01:03:11Or guys.
01:03:12Anyway.
01:03:13We better get downstairs.
01:03:14People are starting to leave.
01:03:16I wonder how Sue did.
01:03:18I can't believe she dumped me, man.
01:03:30This is bullshit!
01:03:31Oh!
01:03:32Oh!
01:03:33Oh!
01:03:34Oh!
01:03:35Oh!
01:03:36Suck it!
01:03:37What the...
01:03:38God, I'm out of here!
01:03:40Yeah!
01:03:41He has good hair, though.
01:03:46Don't keep fused on me.
01:03:48Don't keep in my car, either.
01:04:02Oh, Sue, are you all right?
01:04:05Was it from sex?
01:04:07Did you pop your cork?
01:04:08I don't think so.
01:04:09Not with a guy, anyway.
01:04:11Oh, don't ask.
01:04:12Every possible object.
01:04:14It's like every mechanical thing.
01:04:16It was like...
01:04:17Transformers.
01:04:18They just all became vibrators.
01:04:20Ha!
01:04:21I told you.
01:04:22It's addicting.
01:04:25So what about Chris?
01:04:26Well, last time I saw him, he was running away through your life.
01:04:29I told you he was gay.
01:04:30Oh.
01:04:31Well, I think I'm just...
01:04:32Oh.
01:04:33Cramp.
01:04:34Oh.
01:04:35Oh.
01:04:36I think it's broken.
01:04:37I think it's broken.
01:04:38So wait.
01:04:40None of us cashed an RV card.
01:04:46Oh, Joanna, you're so sweet.
01:04:49So I was gonna go grab some food.
01:04:50Can I go?
01:04:51No.
01:04:53I think I should finish up here.
01:04:55Did you ever find that guy you were looking for?
01:04:57No.
01:04:58I don't know.
01:04:59I don't know.
01:05:00For some reason, I just realized he needs to be my first.
01:05:04Or something.
01:05:05Why?
01:05:06Do you know him?
01:05:07Sort of.
01:05:08Oh.
01:05:09Well, hey.
01:05:10If you happen to run into him, tell him I'd like to see him again.
01:05:13Leave everything inside.
01:05:19Love him.
01:05:20Shut it.
01:05:21You wanna do it with him?
01:05:22I don't wanna hear it from you.
01:05:23You wanna get married?
01:05:24You wanna do it with him?
01:05:25All right.
01:05:26All right.
01:05:27All right.
01:05:28All right.
01:05:29All right.
01:05:30Um.
01:05:52No.
01:05:53No way.
01:06:00Oh well, there's always next year.
01:06:30It's you.
01:06:34I've been waiting for you, J.J.
01:06:38Jolana.
01:07:00And when the heat is on, you'll never take it away.
01:07:30Give me a robot no more.
01:07:36And when the heat is on, you'll never take it away.
01:07:40Wow.
01:07:41That's amazing.
01:07:44Yeah, I didn't know I had it in me.
01:07:47I guess something inspired me.
01:07:51You really captured his expression and his eyes.
01:07:54Yeah, even that little callic he has in his hair.
01:07:59Who's?
01:08:00Eric's.
01:08:01Well, it's him, right?
01:08:04Oh.
01:08:05Yeah.
01:08:08I have to go see him.
01:08:12Well, I think you know what we should do.
01:08:16One nine hundred confess.
01:08:29Sister Terese?
01:08:31Yeah, hon, there was a problem with your credit card.
01:08:34I just need the last three numbers in the back.
01:08:36Oh, sure.
01:08:37Oh.
01:08:38It's two seven one.
01:08:40Um, sister, I know this isn't a confession, but can I ask your opinion on something?
01:08:45Do you think if you do something bad that God will forgive you, like take you back?
01:08:51Sure, hon.
01:08:52Why not?
01:08:53As long as you're on the right path.
01:08:56Well, how do you know if you're on that path?
01:08:59I always look for some kind of sign from the universe.
01:09:02Something to let me know that it's all going to be okay.
01:09:06Sister?
01:09:07Can I get up now?
01:09:08I really gotta pee.
01:09:09No!
01:09:10Hush your trap!
01:09:11Okay, honey.
01:09:12I really need to get back to work, but call back any time.
01:09:15I will.
01:09:16Thanks.
01:09:17Sister?
01:09:18Shut up or I'll punish you hard, you shit fucker!
01:09:23Eric, wait.
01:09:48Cheryl?
01:09:51Eric, um, look, I am so sorry about everything.
01:09:56I was trying to have revenge sex with you at the beginning, but then at the end I wasn't.
01:10:02I just didn't want to do that with you.
01:10:05The revenge part, not the sex part.
01:10:08Um, I, I do want to go out with you.
01:10:13And I didn't realize that until this morning.
01:10:16I mean, you're a completely different guy than Jake is and he's all over these pink-
01:10:20Eric!
01:10:21Okay.
01:10:22Come on, I gotta get going.
01:10:24Oh.
01:10:25Wow.
01:10:26Um, Cheryl, uh, this is my sister Tina.
01:10:29Tina, Cheryl.
01:10:30Hi!
01:10:31Nice to meet you.
01:10:36Uh, so, um, do you mind if I call you in a few days when I get back?
01:10:41Yeah, sure.
01:10:42Oh.
01:10:43Sorry, no kissing.
01:10:44Right.
01:10:45No, kissing.
01:10:46Oh.
01:10:47Mm.
01:10:48Mm.
01:10:49Mm.
01:10:50Mm.
01:10:51Mm.
01:10:52Mm.
01:10:53Mm.
01:10:54Mm.
01:10:55Mm.
01:10:56Hey, did you ever, uh, get those flowers I sent you?
01:10:59I don't even care that you hooked up a plexi.
01:11:00Wait, what?
01:11:01I never did that.
01:11:02I mean, you don't have to lie about it.
01:11:03She told me all about your pierced tongue.
01:11:04She must have me mixed up with someone else.
01:11:05I wonder who it was.
01:11:06...
01:11:15I don't have to lie about it.
01:11:16She told me all about your pierced tongue.
01:11:17...
01:11:19She must have me mixed up with someone else.
01:11:21I wonder who it was.
01:11:22She told me all about your pierced tongue.
01:11:28She must have me mixed up with someone else.
01:11:31I wonder who it was.
01:11:52At least this birthday is over.
01:12:05Dear Lord, please forgive me.
01:12:08I mean, if you could just...
01:12:11I don't know, like send me a sign?
01:12:22Excuse me, excuse me.
01:12:44Do you know where the church is? It's on Fountain Street.
01:12:48Um, yeah, that's the church I go to.
01:12:50Or used to go to.
01:12:52Um, it's straight up that way and then left.
01:12:57You're more than welcome to come with me if you like.
01:13:00Oh, um, I don't know.
01:13:09Well, that's pretty powerful.
01:13:12Oh, 250 horsepower, 225 pounds of torque.
01:13:17Like I said, you're more than welcome to hop on.
01:13:21I don't think so.
01:13:23But thanks.
01:13:25What's your name?
01:13:26Sue. What's yours?
01:13:28Jesus.
01:13:30Really?
01:13:32Si.
01:13:34Maybe I could use the ride.
01:13:35Or I could use the ride.
01:13:36Or I could use the ride.
01:13:37Wherever you go, make I go to a side.
01:13:38Do you want to buy and go to a pool?
01:13:40I don't think so.
01:13:41Hello there.
01:13:42Are you guys all right?
01:13:43Oh, yeah.
01:13:44Just go outside.
01:13:45My goodness.
01:13:46Well, you're out there.
01:13:47Well, I need a pool.
01:13:48I've prepared for you.
01:13:49I've prepared for you.
01:13:50You go outside.
01:13:51Now I know.
01:13:52If I need to save my family and a lot of fun.
01:13:53I know.
01:13:54Well, you're out there.
01:13:55You're out there.
01:13:56You're out there.
01:13:57You're out there.
01:13:58And you're out there.
Recommended
1:14:03
|
Up next
1:14:00
1:14:03
17:42
1:07:48
2:01:44
1:19:22
2:25:13
1:13:31
1:52:09