- today
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00:00Oh
00:06Hello, everyone. Oh my god. I
00:12Am Joanna Garcia Swisher
00:17Is it correct that you're not queer I am not we're very happy you're here I'm
00:22Unbelievably gorgeous. I cannot believe it. Thank you. Goodness. You are literally glowing under this you
00:30You're so sweet. Well, thank you. I'm really I'm so looking forward to getting to know all of you
00:33But tonight you're all here because someone in your relationship has issued an ultimatum
00:39one person is ready to get married right now and the other
00:44Isn't quite ready yet
00:47By a show of hands who in the relationship issued the ultimatum
00:52Okay, all right, okay
00:54Okay, well, let's get into it. Let's get to know each other want to start here Xander
01:01Vanessa and I have a great life together
01:04It has so much fun involved and I love that. I love that I'm like honestly every day. I'm like thank you
01:13Vanessa I met when we were seniors in high school and our boyfriends were best friends
01:18Fast forward five years I went to a taco truck first
01:25I asked if she was still dating her very long-term boyfriend and then my follow-up question. Are you gay?
01:31I had not come out to anyone except for my best friend, so I guess I felt comfortable enough. Yes, I am
01:39four years later here we are
01:41Your high school boyfriend blocked you he did block me
01:46I feel like that we have a connection that I'm never gonna find again and I don't honestly want to look for it again
01:54But I want to be married and I'm not sure if Vanessa's willing to do that or not
01:59I
02:01Love you so much
02:03But I never envisioned a long-term relationship
02:07I don't want permanency and I don't want stability. I want freedom
02:12And that's not really what marriage consists of
02:15Giving an ultimatum means at the end
02:18If she's not ready yet, you will walk away as much as I love our connection. I
02:23I
02:25I want children. It may be a little selfish
02:29But I am willing to walk away because I care about
02:33My future children more than I care about anything else
02:38The terms of the ultimatum are very clear
02:41You will either leave here engaged or you will break up
02:46And of course, it's possible that along the way
02:49You'll see a future and maybe even fall in love with someone new
02:56Yoli and Mal
02:58Who's issuing the ultimatum?
03:00Yoli, okay
03:02Yoli and I first met during pride about three years ago
03:06She was a men's stylist at Barney's at the time
03:08I asked her for Instagram so I could continue asking for discounts at Barney's
03:14That's really it
03:16I knew I loved Mal when I got sick with the flu
03:21She took care of me like she put the vix vapor rub on me like real rough on the neck and oh, I just love her so much
03:28Like I want you to choose me
03:31I need to feel that
03:32It's been three years. We talk about being married often
03:36But Mal has expressed to me that she wants to have the money for the rig money for the house money for the kids money for the kids
03:43Education yeah before even taking the next step she's a burgo
03:47And I'm just like I just want to be with you
03:52Yoli she wants kids right now because of her age
03:55But for me, it's not about if I want to marry her. I want to marry her
03:58I don't necessarily feel like I'm in the place to be able to provide for her
04:02Like I want to provide the down payment for the house exactly how much
04:05It is gonna be to like do in vitro at what point are we?
04:10Joining this journey of life together. I wouldn't put up with anybody else's bullshit for this long
04:16What's holding you back? I mean I knew her as a friend before I knew her as a lover
04:19Every time she's talked about another lover. It's been very similar and you've talked about your lovers
04:24So great same tenacity same like boisterous way, so I'm just like why why me?
04:33I want to figure that out
04:34Yoli falls in love with wherever she's watering the grass at and that is scary eight weeks from now
04:40However many weeks from now you can come back and be like actually now
04:42I know I told you you need to marry me and then be like
04:46I actually don't know I'm actually in love with this other person
04:48I don't I really don't know now I do want marriage, but I just want her to be really sure about me
04:54Sorry, you feel that way
04:58I feel like I found my person I want you to feel confident in me and in us and it takes a lot for you to feel confident in us
05:08True
05:09I I don't think it's possible for me to find another better person. I mean now. I don't think we're gonna break up. I do think that we'll choose each other
05:18I think
05:20What's making you so emotional right now ultimatums suck
05:23We've been at this for three years and
05:26At the end of this we could just not be together
05:29You lose the person that you thought you were building a life with
05:31We're both alphas and we're both very like
05:35If this is done, I'm not gonna chase her because like I respect boundaries and she's not the type of person that speaks to exes
05:41That sucks
05:43Or it's the beginning of the future
05:46Cheers to that
05:48So committing to marriage is it's a huge deal and there's a lot of reasons why
05:55People say that they're not ready
05:57But if we're all being honest
06:01It often comes down to one question
06:04Is this
06:05Person really the one person that I want to spend the rest of my life with or could there be someone else out there that could be a better fit?
06:14Well in this experience you're gonna get a chance to find out
06:19You're currently strangers, but each of you are compatible with multiple people here
06:26Your only focus over the next week will be deciding which of them you think could be marriage material
06:32And then at the end of the week each of you are gonna get a chance to choose someone
06:40That you think embodies what you look for in a spouse
06:45You'll move in together for three weeks as a new couple in a trial marriage
06:50And then you'll do the same thing all over again with the person that you arrived with
06:59Tonight is your last night as a couple
07:02Hmm no tomorrow morning
07:06You'll break up and become exes
07:09Sure at the end of this experience each of you will decide what your future holds whether you leave here engaged
07:18Single or newly in love choosing the person that you're gonna spend the rest of your life with is
07:23The most important decision that you will ever make
07:26But for now
07:28Enjoy your last night as a couple I will see you in one week at the choice
07:33Cheers to love
07:34My dreams come to love
07:36Cheers, y'all
07:37Cheers
07:38Cheers
07:38Cheers
07:39Cheers, everyone
07:42I'm very excited to begin dating new people
07:46People fall in love with me pretty easily
07:48It's like game on
07:50Now cheers to our trial marriage
07:56They're cute
07:59I'm not ready to see mal
08:01Explore other people and enjoy other people
08:05But I mean i'm willing to process that if it means at the end of this work sure as hell about each other
08:11Our dreams come alive
08:16Bye friends
08:17Bye
08:18We'll see you soon
08:19I hope
08:23This experience is the craziest thing that i've ever done
08:26Either i leave here engaged to vanessa
08:29I leave here single or with someone else
08:31No matter what this experience is going to change my life forever
08:35For now i got one big heart
08:38Just wanna let you got two hands out
08:40Just wanna hug your
08:42One big
08:43One big
08:44One big
08:45One big
08:45One big
08:46For now i got one big heart
08:48Just wanna let you got two hands out
08:51Just wanna hug your life
08:52One big
08:53One big
08:54One big
08:54One big
08:55You ready?
08:55Okay, that way maybe?
08:56One big
08:59Lexi, other way
09:02No
09:02God, fuck
09:03Okay
09:09Cheers to the last night
09:15I'm like wondering how it's gonna feel talking to other people and like
09:20Like did we flirt?
09:21I'm like curious to know i haven't been flirted with by another woman in a while
09:26I don't even know how to flirt so
09:28I don't know if you were good at flirting when we first started dating
09:31That's fair
09:33When i first met ray she was trying to booty call me
09:37I learned she's a bit of a boobs girl
09:40She's got a lot of what i like
09:43I'm sorry parents
09:45Oh my god
09:45Oh boy
09:46That's okay
09:47My mom doesn't know how to work the tv
09:48I love ray more than i think i ever will love another person
09:57We've been together for over three years now and i really want to marry this girl
10:02My mom plans weddings and my dad's a jeweler
10:05If that gives any hints
10:07You're the person i've been sleeping next to for the last three years
10:10I get like one last night of cuddles
10:12Oh my god stop it
10:14I do love you
10:16Come here
10:16We grew up envisioning this like
10:28picturesque like running down the street like screaming the i love you and like oh that's my person but like
10:35I don't know i don't know does if that exists for me
10:42Hearing you talk about this like picturesque
10:45Thing this perfect thing that you see that makes me think about like
10:51What your expectations are and like i just i'm not gonna live up to them
10:57You know i'm not gonna live up to perfect like if we're just
11:02We're not perfect and we're never going to be but i'm scared that you don't know how to be okay with that
11:07It's scary thinking like that you could be more sure if it was someone else
11:19Hate to use the words like i've given you an ultimatum because i don't want i don't like the idea of feeling like i pushed you against a wall but
11:29You know i hope that this experience gives us clarity
11:33You're so sexy what the fuck
11:49Have another dream
11:55It is a year and 11 months since i met your beautiful fine-ass self
12:03i actually found her on an instagram hashtag that's really embarrassing the hashtag was lesbian latina
12:10i
12:11Was lonely single i wouldn't say thirsty but a little parched
12:15i of course dm'd her and we just like never left each other after that
12:21And i want to be with you in the future so i hope that
12:25This experiment helps us
12:27Determine whether we want to move forward with that whether you want to because i know i do
12:33i gave tiff an ultimatum because you know i don't want to toot my horn or anything but she really likes what i do in bed
12:39yes ma'am
12:40Tiff knows i bring a lot to the table i think the sex is just a plus i love and hate
12:49that mildred is
12:51spicy
12:53As hell but who wants to date a boring person i already miss you babe i already miss you too
13:00If she wants to keep this spice in her life she needs to put a ring on it
13:04yeah
13:05yeah that's how it is
13:06We make each other happy in the moment
13:10but it's really hard to see clarity when it comes to a future with you
13:15and
13:15i want to be married now
13:18do you
13:19just want the
13:21concept of marriage with
13:23someone
13:24special
13:29what are you after
13:32i believe that everybody wants to be
13:36in a relationship with someone special
13:39but if this person is not
13:41on the same page as me
13:43then this person can't move forward with me
13:46so i must let them go and find who is actually on the same page as me
13:50and at the end of this experiment there has to be a decision
13:55yeah
13:57i guess it just doesn't seem
14:00that real not discrediting your your feelings it just doesn't seem that real because so many times
14:05when we break up or majority of the times you break up with me
14:09i feel like you throw me away and then
14:12two days later
14:14not even two days later sometimes two hours later you you want to get back
14:17i understand that but this is not another one of our breakups
14:28i won't come back after this
14:31i love mildred so much but i'm not ready yet to commit to marriage because mildred and i's
14:39communication is horrible we'll be great one week and then the next week we'll break up
14:44because we just shove all our problems under the rug and we're back to the same old
14:49bullshit i don't want to go into a marriage having these issues but i also feel like i don't want to
14:56lose her and it's hard it's hard
15:01i care about you i love you i think you're sexy as
15:05i just really hope that through meeting other people that we can really
15:16truly find connection with each other
15:22i think this is your opportunity because i'm ready whether it's with you or alone or maybe with
15:29someone else
15:36do you want to um work your way over here for a little kiss if you want to yeah
15:59i don't know
16:06i don't know
16:08i don't know
16:10Mildred's already been married to a woman.
16:23She's had a wife.
16:27She's had a family.
16:28She knows exactly what it is she wants.
16:31It makes me feel extremely pressured and uncomfortable, but Mildred is right.
16:42And Mildred does have a right to know whether we are going to leave each other
16:48or whether we're going to move forward together in a marriage.
16:51This is it.
16:52Yeah.
16:54Deep down inside, I know we truly do want this.
16:59We do want a future with each other.
17:01We just don't know how.
17:03And hopefully I'll find that how.
17:06But I can't make any promises.
17:11And I just want you to know that, you know, regardless,
17:17I will always, always care for you.
17:25I care for you, too.
17:26I care about you a lot.
17:34At the end of this experience, I'm going to have to make a choice.
17:39And I feel like it's going to be the biggest choice of my life.
17:47I feel like I literally just lost a part of me.
18:01But if I could choose right here, right now, to marry her, I still wouldn't.
18:16But for now, I'll be without you.
18:21I'm going to have to make a choice of my life.
18:22I'm going to have to make a choice of my life.
18:23I'm going to have to make a choice of my life.
18:24I know.
18:25Who's going to wake you up?
18:26My goodness.
18:27I don't have anything to wake me up now, now that you're not going to be next to me.
18:32You're going to have to learn how to use this alarm clock thing over here.
18:35I am.
18:36When we first touched hands, it was like something that you see in the movies.
18:44It was almost like the universe brought us together.
18:48Time stood still.
18:49Yeah.
18:50It was just magical, like butterflies and rainbows and unicorns.
18:55It was magical.
18:56Well, actual butterflies, I think.
18:57Yeah.
18:58No, they weren't.
18:59Oh, yeah.
19:01So last night was our last night together.
19:05It was really special.
19:07It was.
19:08I am ready to get engaged, have a ring on this finger.
19:13I am ready to get married.
19:15The idea of marriage to me is really like that ultimate commitment.
19:20And you also get to wear some flashy bling, which I'm not opposed to at all.
19:25I want to live with you for five years.
19:28And if this is meant to be where I want to go to that marriage state, then I'm open to it.
19:35Five years sounds like a long time.
19:37I've been waiting for like 10 already.
19:39Oh, my God.
19:40I just feel so, like, I'm so, like, anxious right now.
19:45Yeah.
19:46Like, my heart is, like, breathe.
19:50I feel that she is the one.
19:52I'm just, like, my processing takes longer than her.
19:57So I'm hoping this will accelerate that.
19:59You kind of have to.
20:01I know.
20:02Oh, God.
20:03It's not really a hope.
20:04It's like...
20:05Okay.
20:06Yeah.
20:07It's like a have to.
20:09I know.
20:10Yeah.
20:11You're gonna have somebody on the other side of the bed.
20:16I know.
20:17It's so weird.
20:18Weird, huh?
20:19Weird.
20:20Yeah.
20:21Good luck to you and that person.
20:24And I'm fully participating in this experience.
20:39So, you know, you.
20:41You be you and do your thing.
20:45You're gonna get the hug.
20:46No big hug.
20:48You're gonna get through this.
20:49And whatever happens, no attachment to the outcome.
21:02Yeah.
21:04I did give Ossie the ultimatum, and I fully stand by it.
21:16I just know that it is the right thing for both of us.
21:23It definitely feels real now, and I knew that this is when all the emotions were going to come out.
21:31Just a lot of sadness.
21:32Let's do this, girl.
21:41This is going to be different.
21:44I don't want to spend time without you.
21:46Yeah.
21:48Like, we haven't spent more than, what, like a week apart in three years.
21:54Yeah, it was hard.
21:56It's going to be super weird to see you with anyone else.
22:02And obviously, like, I cannot picture you with someone else right now, and I can't picture myself with someone else, but if that opportunity, like, comes and feels natural, let's both feel free enough to explore that.
22:16It's so shitty to say, but, like, let's not hold ourselves back. Like, we thought this experience was a good idea. That's why we're here.
22:23Commit to it.
22:25Commit to it.
22:27I kind of don't want to do this anymore. Let's just be together.
22:31I know, but that wouldn't solve anything. You know, like, that brings us right back to where we are right now, where you want to get married and I don't.
22:38I know, but I don't want to.
22:40You're having commitment issues, I think, fan.
22:45You think so?
22:47You know, don't get mad at me if I like someone, right?
22:54You know?
22:54I'll definitely be jealous.
23:01You've been so committed to me for so long and known you want to marry me and, like, be with me forever, which is terrifying, but, you know, give someone else a shot and see if maybe the connection you have with me is something you can see yourself having with someone else.
23:18I don't want to be away from you.
23:20You're a sucker.
23:20I think I have to go.
23:36I want you to be able to get to where I'm at. I want you to take this seriously.
23:42I will.
23:43Here's to hoping that it all makes sense.
23:47Here's to knowing that it never does.
23:49Here's to thinking it'll happen soon and here's to knowing that it never does.
23:56Always tried to do it right by you, but it's getting so hard to be bad.
23:59You have to let me go.
24:01I love you.
24:03I love you.
24:04It's getting too hard to be bad.
24:07Literally last night I fell asleep next to the person that I want to get married to and this morning I watched them walk right out the door and that sucked, but I think everyone's in the same boat as me.
24:32We're all kind of like getting used to this idea of calling someone our exes and like being in this weird dynamic where like we haven't been single in forever.
24:41I am literally here in my cutest bikini and I'm going on dates with eight beautiful women and as weird as that is to say, I'm here and I'm doing it and I am living in whatever this moment is.
24:55So why did you give your ex the ultimatum?
24:58I just want to feel chosen.
24:59Like, I just feel like you're not like, my thing is like, I want you to be like, hell yeah.
25:03This is going to sound really weird, but like, I'm super into like tarot readings and stuff.
25:08The fact that my now ex, Aussie, is going to be dating other people.
25:14I don't know how many feet away from me.
25:16I'm just going to kind of go with it.
25:20Hello.
25:20Hi.
25:21It's really rare that you go out and you find this many women that are all focused on marriage and commitment.
25:27Whether you were the ultimatum giver or the ultimatum receiver, we're all thinking about marriage in some capacity.
25:33What do you play?
25:34Basketball.
25:35Come on.
25:36Yes.
25:37Okay.
25:37I played in college.
25:38I've also dated my teammates before, so I know what that goes, I know what that looks like.
25:41Oh no, you're one of those.
25:42Normally you go into a date and it's like a lot of small talk, whereas here you're like deep diving at the first like question you're asking because we're all trying to get to what you want in a partner, what you don't want.
25:55I'm more of like a doer, like you do or you don't.
25:59I'm laughing only because you sound like my ex.
26:03I issued the ultimatum and I'm ready, I'm ready to commit and I want to be with someone that I know I can spend the rest of my life with.
26:12This beautiful pool with all these ladies, it's like going to Dinah Shore all over again.
26:17Where's my drink?
26:19So we're on this date.
26:21Yeah, I know.
26:22I would say I have to say flat out, you're the most masculine person I've ever been on a date with.
26:28Fair.
26:28But yeah, fair enough.
26:29I think for now, I think you might find out later.
26:31It's a little different.
26:33This is cool though.
26:35Like traditionally, I don't date mask.
26:39Yeah.
26:39But I'm also like, fuck it, we're here, I'm grown.
26:43Like I might have way more in common with you than anybody.
26:45I know.
26:46So I'm like, fine.
26:47We'll figure out who's top and who bottoms up another time.
26:49But like for now, we're good, we're good.
26:51Whether you dress more masculine or whether you dress more feminine or somewhere in between, I try to be more open-minded.
26:57But when it comes to the basic logistics of each other, I'm a picky person.
27:01So like a deal breaker for me, it's like I can't get down with a girl that flat out like eats like a juicy raw fucking steak.
27:09I really want to not eat meat.
27:11But interesting, definitely interesting.
27:16You, like what's your take on like having a child?
27:19No, not really my forte.
27:23That's a deal breaker for me.
27:25On to the next one.
27:27You're young, you're young, right?
27:29Yeah, I'm 24.
27:30You're 24.
27:32Oh no.
27:33Did you get the ultimatum or someone else?
27:35I gave.
27:35You gave the ultimatum.
27:36Okay, so you are ready.
27:38I'm ready.
27:38You are ready to go at 24.
27:40Yeah.
27:41As far as characteristics or qualities I see in a potential partner, I do want someone that is really good at communicating with me.
27:50And I want someone to validate my feelings.
27:53I also want someone that can keep it spicy and keep things interesting and keep me on my tippy toes because I get bored as fuck.
28:01I love your hair, by the way.
28:07It's awesome.
28:13Oh God.
28:14I haven't gone on a date in four years, but here we are.
28:20I'm ready.
28:21I'm going to get a drink or five and then I'm going to date everyone that I can.
28:25I'm going to date you and you and you and you and everyone I can, you know, get my hands on.
28:31Hi.
28:31Hi.
28:32Welcome to our date.
28:33Hi.
28:34You smell so good.
28:37Oh, thank you.
28:38You look so good.
28:40Oh, thank you.
28:41What do you look for in partner?
28:43Vibes.
28:45That's what I would say too.
28:48Vibes.
28:49Mal is strikingly good looking.
28:52You're August 26th.
28:53I'm August 26th.
28:54I always say that if I found a clone of myself, I would date them.
28:57Do you think people would think we're clones of each other?
28:59They saw us next to each other.
29:00I mean, yeah.
29:01We look alike.
29:02One thousand.
29:03I don't want someone who is just, like, all into work or, like, you're like, I love adventure.
29:10Taking red, that's my biggest thing.
29:12Oh, my gosh.
29:13She's the cutest thing I've ever seen.
29:14So, you're telling me, Tiff, that you date pillow princesses?
29:18Um, not always.
29:20Mildred's not a pillow princess.
29:21She dates pillow princesses, everybody.
29:23Mildred?
29:23No, no, no, always.
29:24No, no, no.
29:24Mildred's not.
29:25Mildred's not.
29:26But I have before.
29:27I have before.
29:29She's beautiful.
29:31She's a feisty little thing.
29:32So, how are you today?
29:37I'm feeling good, but it feels weird.
29:40I can see what Vanessa's doing.
29:42I definitely have not processed everything.
29:44And, yeah, I don't know.
29:46Like, yes.
29:49That's where everything is happening.
29:50One thing I'm not doing is looking to see if Tiff is looking at me.
29:54Because I'm looking really good.
29:57And I don't want to sound cocky, but I know she's thinking of me.
30:00Thank you so much.
30:05A change for me, and I'm feeling really happy and good about it.
30:09It's bizarre.
30:10Oh, my gosh.
30:12What are you drinking?
30:13Tequila water with some lime.
30:15How about you?
30:15Aperol spritz.
30:16I just want to make sure.
30:18Lexi wants to get married, right?
30:19Lexi is giving me the ultimatum.
30:21Yeah, Sandra's giving me the ultimatum.
30:23So, we both got it.
30:24But you don't even want to get married.
30:26Well, it's not necessarily that.
30:27I think it's just, like, it's such a big deal for me that it's, like, scary to commit to.
30:33The idea of, like, being with someone forever scares me.
30:37You know?
30:37I think most people, I don't know.
30:39I don't know.
30:40Apparently not for our partners, but, uh.
30:41I know.
30:42That's the thing that I don't get, is, like, how do you get to that point where you're so confident in saying you're my partner forever?
30:48I thought that you didn't want marriage.
30:50How about kids?
30:51Definitely kids.
30:52I would love to host a child in my belly if my body allows it.
30:55Mm-hmm.
30:56What about you?
30:57I have, like, a very, like, specific scenario for what I want with kids.
30:59Tell me.
31:00Okay.
31:00What is it?
31:00So, me and my partner, like, we have the same sperm.
31:03Okay.
31:04Because I want the mutual father.
31:05Sure.
31:05And then, like, I will have her embryo and, like, in me.
31:09So, like, I have a connection.
31:10Yes.
31:10And then the other one, like, she'll have mine.
31:12That's, like, a total transfer.
31:14Wow.
31:14That's a wild thought.
31:17So, what do you look for in a partner?
31:18Is it, do you have, like, a type?
31:20Great question.
31:20Is this, like, your type?
31:21Well, first, I'm pansexual.
31:23So, for me, like, it doesn't really matter, like, gender-wise.
31:26And I don't, I don't know if I have a real physical type.
31:29I like someone who's confident in themselves.
31:31I mean, that's, like, sexy.
31:32Yes.
31:32And, like, I like that.
31:33Just someone who knows what they want.
31:35Because I think I'm not like that sometimes.
31:37Not that I'm not confident.
31:38I feel like, in a general sense, like, I have a good career.
31:41Like, I have a good head on my shoulders, good family.
31:43And, like...
31:44You're pretty.
31:45Oh, thank you.
31:45So are you.
31:46I guess you can't say that about yourself.
31:47No, I can't say that.
31:48You can't be like, I'm pretty.
31:49Oh, I am shy, but I feel like I like someone who can, like, bring it out in me sometimes.
31:54Was she the first girl you've dated?
31:56Um, seriously, yes.
31:58Like, I had a girlfriend in college, but it lasted, like, a month.
32:01Now that I've found the word pansexual, like, I really feel like that's my vibe.
32:05Cheers.
32:06To get some clarity.
32:06Oh, my God.
32:07Yeah.
32:09I don't even know what time it is, so...
32:10Yeah, same.
32:11I mean, literally this morning, we all woke up with our partners.
32:15Yeah.
32:15And now we're, like, single.
32:16Yeah.
32:16Does it feel real?
32:18No.
32:18Kind of, no.
32:19But knowing that our girlfriends, our ex-girlfriends are over there laughing, I can hear them.
32:23I'm like, I don't know how you're going to be awake after having another one of these.
32:27You're so right.
32:29So we should laugh a little bit louder and throw each other in the pool.
32:36Yeah.
32:37So tell me about you.
32:42I love being outside and pretty much always moving.
32:46First thing I noticed about Lexi is that she is...
32:51She has this amazing...
32:53I am also pretty active, but I do, like, love a good movie day.
32:59Yeah.
32:59Yeah.
33:00That's huge.
33:02Just, I don't know, say it.
33:04Like, her appearance is extremely sexy.
33:07Show me what it is.
33:10Show me what it is.
33:11Show me what it is.
33:12Lexi knew what she was doing, picking the bikini she picked.
33:16I don't even know if people are going to be, like, talking to her or, like, talking to them.
33:19But they're honestly hard to hide, so there's no blaming her for what she's got going on.
33:24Um, okay, what makes you a catch?
33:26Oof.
33:27What makes me a catch?
33:28Wait.
33:29How about this?
33:30You tell me what makes me a catch, and I'll tell you what makes you a catch.
33:33Are we...
33:33I don't know anything about you yet.
33:35Cool.
33:35Okay.
33:35I'm going to not look at your boobs, because I know they're already great, so I'm just
33:40really looking at you.
33:41You're beautiful.
33:42She's hot.
33:43Did I say that?
33:43She's hot.
33:44Your eyes look like...
33:46Melted chocolate?
33:49I think.
33:50You have a bubbly personality.
33:52Um, I'm going to imagine that you are athletic to some degree.
33:56Very, yeah.
33:57You seem like you could talk to anyone, and I think that's a really great thing.
34:01Okay.
34:02Okay, those are all the things I know about you so far.
34:03That was very, very spot on.
34:05Oh.
34:06Yeah.
34:06Fantastic.
34:07That was very spot on.
34:07Should I make another guess, and we'll see if it's right?
34:09Your favorite color is green.
34:11Nope, blue.
34:12But I do like green on.
34:14All right, cool.
34:14So, it was a good start.
34:15I also really like yellow, so I'm enjoying the bikini.
34:18Yeah.
34:19Um, you're also super bubbly.
34:21I can hear you talking elsewhere, and, like, you just...
34:24No, no, no.
34:24Loud.
34:25No, no, no.
34:25Your energy is awesome.
34:27Like, it just, like, it's helping make this experience, because, like, amidst all the weight of
34:31this...
34:31Yeah.
34:32You need the light, and you definitely have that, like...
34:35Wow.
34:35I'm so glad we went through this route.
34:37Yeah.
34:38Keep telling me.
34:38This is amazing.
34:39Um, great smile, by the way.
34:42Artsy more than sporty?
34:44I'm definitely not sporty.
34:46Artsy more than sporty.
34:47Throw me into a sport, and I'll just do some somersaults.
34:50I don't know what I'll do.
34:51Yeah, definitely.
34:51But you have a good vibe doing it.
34:53Yeah.
34:54All right, I'm getting somewhere with that.
34:55You're really good.
34:56Okay.
34:56Well, cheers.
34:57Cheers, yeah.
34:58Thanks for playing that game with me.
34:59It made me feel really good.
35:00I hope I made you feel really good.
35:02Because you did a really good job.
35:03It made me feel great, even though you told me my eyes look like melted chocolate.
35:06No, I'm kidding.
35:07They're so beautiful.
35:08Melted chocolate is good.
35:09Chestnut.
35:09Chestnut.
35:09I am amazed at how well I am connecting with pretty much every single one of them.
35:15Their hesitation is not necessarily based on the fundamentals of marriage, but rather,
35:21do I want to marry this partner that I'm with right now?
35:23I see value in marriage for a lot of reasons, but for me, I'm searching for that real emotional
35:29desire to get married, and that's what I've been lacking so far.
35:32I feel like I'm always taking care of things right now.
35:35Interesting.
35:35In my relationship with Xander.
35:38Huh.
35:38Like, I don't want to have to fight battles for another adult.
35:41Interesting.
35:42Because I am younger, and like, I...
35:44You're 24, right?
35:45Yeah.
35:45And like, I have my shit sorted.
35:47I am a protector-provider type.
35:50I'm like, do you need me to call the doctor's office?
35:52Do you need me to get this together?
35:53Because it's like, I feel like I have to in my relationships.
35:56Or else it won't get done.
35:57It won't.
35:58There gets to be a point for me where it's like, I am...
36:02I'm exhausted of always being the one that feels like I need to do that for someone else.
36:06I get that.
36:07And I have not dated anybody who's like, I can get this done.
36:11Yes.
36:12Not even just for me, but for themselves slash us.
36:15I totally, totally get that.
36:18It's amazing.
36:19Yeah.
36:20I came here because I wanted to marry Rae.
36:22I still feel that way.
36:24But I think I'm seeing that there's other outcomes in this process.
36:27I feel like when I first saw Vanessa, I thought we were going to clash because we have very extroverted personalities.
36:34But as I'm talking to her more, I feel very comfortable with her.
36:37There's flirtiness and fun and like, it's coming my way.
36:41So it's totally weird.
36:42What are you drinking?
36:44An old-fashioned in water.
36:45Okay, I'm a Manhattan girl.
36:46Yes.
36:47I will tell you this, I make a freaking phenomenal Manhattan.
36:51What?
36:52You're amazing.
36:53Are you a Virgo?
36:54No, I'm not.
36:55I am a Capricorn.
36:57Are you a Virgo?
36:57I am.
36:58I've actually been told I do really poorly with Virgos.
37:02That's not true.
37:03That's actually like your soulmate.
37:05So whoever told you that was trying to keep you away from Virgos.
37:08Oh, so probably just a crazy ex.
37:10For sure.
37:12Virgos and Capricorns are like the match.
37:15All right, well, cheers.
37:16They're both brownie.
37:16Cheers to already finding it.
37:17Great.
37:18Our work here is done.
37:19Um, I got issued the ultimatum.
37:23You did.
37:23I put on me.
37:24I think you were the issuer if I remember.
37:26I was, yeah.
37:27I'm the attacker.
37:28I'm the bludgeoner.
37:29Yeah.
37:30Um, it's a timing thing for me.
37:33Yeah.
37:33My parents have been together for 45, 50 years.
37:35Wow.
37:36They didn't get married for like the first 10 years of their relationship.
37:39And I'm just like, you don't have to rush into these things.
37:41Mm-hmm.
37:42The other part of that is my ex loves really hard.
37:47She's a serial monogamist.
37:48Every relationship I've heard her talk about, she's super vested in.
37:50And I just don't feel different than them.
37:52So you're like wondering.
37:53If you wouldn't marry me, I want to know why I'm so different than where you've been.
38:00So, yeah.
38:01Yeah.
38:01Part of me is annoyed with the ultimatum.
38:04Because I'm like, you're putting it on me, but I kind of am unsure about how you feel.
38:07No, no, that makes sense.
38:08My ex, um, like when we talked about like our relationships, like her problems didn't change
38:14between me and the last girl.
38:16Right.
38:17And that's frustrating because it does scare me.
38:19Like it makes me wonder like, am I different?
38:22So I feel like similarly.
38:23Yeah.
38:23Except you're the one who issued those with me.
38:25I know, so I'm the asshole.
38:26No, you're not that.
38:27You just know what you want.
38:28Yeah, my parents have been married for 25 years.
38:31Like they, you know, nothing was perfect.
38:33It wasn't always easy, but like they love each other and they've gone through life together.
38:36I think no relationship's perfect.
38:39It's about being a team.
38:41It's not 50-50 all the time, but it's about like working through it.
38:44We got to grow.
38:45Yeah.
38:45But like I'm going to work through the hard shit with you because it's you.
38:48Yeah.
38:48That type of thing.
38:49That's interesting.
38:50Yeah.
38:51I feel the same way.
38:53Every single conversation I'm having with everyone I've been on a date with goes to another level.
39:01It's been really awesome.
39:03Vanessa is funny.
39:05She's quick-witted.
39:06It's fun.
39:07It's easy.
39:08But Lexi and I, she's talking about family dynamics.
39:11That's one of my core values.
39:12I didn't expect to have a connection so fast, but I would absolutely love to explore more connection with her.
39:19Go deeper.
39:20Do you want to just wrap this up and do the three weeks now?
39:21The last time I hung out with this many women at one time was right before Yoli.
39:28Hello.
39:29Hello.
39:30How are you?
39:31Good to see you.
39:32You too.
39:33So?
39:37So what are some things that you want from this experience being both of us are the ones that
39:43issued the ultimatum?
39:45Right.
39:46I am excited for like an outcome.
39:48I kind of just want to know yes or no.
39:50Uh-huh.
39:50Essentially.
39:51I totally feel that.
39:52I want it to be a hell yeah, or if not, then I'm okay with like letting that go.
39:57Right.
39:58It sucks.
39:59Yeah.
39:59But I want you to be like hell yes about me.
40:03I would love, like how great would it be to hear like, oh my God, like I have to have
40:08you.
40:08Yeah.
40:09Like you're the love of my life.
40:10Absolutely.
40:10And act on it.
40:11Yeah.
40:15I don't feel like that I've gotten that.
40:18Damn.
40:20I don't think I'm the worst person in the world.
40:22Right, right, right, right.
40:24You're like, I'm not terrible.
40:25Yeah.
40:26After today's round of dating, it's feeling really good meeting people who gave the ultimatum
40:32just because it's like an affirmation of like you're not crazy for expecting your partner
40:37to kind of show up.
40:39And here's someone like Xander who matches your energy.
40:42Like it feels awesome.
40:43This date is the best one that I've had.
40:46This is the one, this is the one, this is the one, this is the one I've been waiting
40:54for, this is the one.
40:57Yes, we're drinking tequila.
40:59Yeah.
40:59You're ready.
41:00Listen, I would say yes if we were going to like spend the night together.
41:03Oh my God.
41:04Take it back a step.
41:05We haven't even moved in together yet.
41:07Take it back.
41:07I take it back.
41:08Don't take it back.
41:08I'm okay with it.
41:10Everybody put your drink over the phone.
41:12Cheers to this wonderful experience that we're all going through and cheers to love, cheers
41:19to marriage, and hopefully we can all get our shit together.
41:23Wow.
41:24Cheers to that.
41:25That was pretty cool.
41:26I don't even know where my drink went.
41:28Oh yeah.
41:28I feel like we're all at a lesbian club and all our exes are here.
41:32No, I can't sleep.
41:33I can't sleep.
41:33I can't sleep.
41:33I can't sleep.
41:33I can't sleep.
41:33I can't sleep.
41:33I can't sleep.
41:33I can't sleep.
41:33I can't sleep.
41:34I can't sleep.
41:34I can't sleep.
41:34No, I can't sleep.
41:35I can't sleep.
41:35I can't sleep.
41:36It's weird.
41:37It's weird seeing your ex looking hot and then to be single.
41:42And dating around, it feels very uncomfortable, but I want to keep pushing myself forward
41:48to give me the answers that I need out of this process.
41:51I have a question and you guys might not want to answer.
41:54Um, would you guys be willing to tell everyone else who your number one was?
42:00No.
42:00No.
42:01No.
42:01No.
42:02No.
42:02No.
42:03Maybe, maybe Yoli.
42:05No.
42:06Don't worry about it.
42:07Are we jealous people?
42:08That's aggressive.
42:09I can't.
42:10It's a great question.
42:11All right.
42:12If Vanessa wasn't here, then I would have dated everyone at this table.
42:14I don't understand.
42:15I...
42:16Whoa.
42:17Ooh.
42:18Hostility, sarcasm, jealousy.
42:20It's just in the air.
42:21And I feel like me being born and bred in Jersey, I've got that in me.
42:25Game on.
42:26Okay.
42:27No one else?
42:28Nothing else?
42:29What I'm excited for is my new relationship with Mel.
42:32We have threesomes with Mel and E.E.S. present Mel and we have threesomes occasionally.
42:37That sounds very uncomfortable.
42:39I'll join that thruple.
42:40I'll be a part of that.
42:42Can we do that?
42:44Can all three of us be married together?
42:46It's not legal.
42:47It's not legal.
42:48But it can be consensual.
42:49We can be okay with that.
42:51They're both cute.
42:53I think it would be best if this experience just became like a polyamorous orgy.
42:58We're all like, okay.
42:59That's kind of how I feel.
43:00I like how you guys are like, yeah, let's do it.
43:04I'm like, hold on.
43:05It's just I feel awkward for that.
43:08Do the awkward dance.
43:10It's a small world out there.
43:12Very.
43:13It really is a small world.
43:14It really is.
43:15Like a lesbian world, I feel like.
43:16Oh, for sure.
43:17Especially if you live in one area.
43:18Yes.
43:19You just hang out with the same people.
43:20Even for the big city.
43:21It doesn't matter.
43:22It's really weird seeing my ex at the cocktail party because I know my mom bought her that dress
43:26and want to go give her a hug and like tell her how pretty she looks.
43:29Should we go find our own little cozy spot?
43:32Absolutely.
43:33Should we go to that fire?
43:34The fire.
43:35Ooh.
43:36But I deserve the person that is going to tell me that I'm the one.
43:39And I think when you're surrounding yourself with people who also have marriage on their
43:42mind, it's like fun.
43:44I kind of told you, you are not my typical type.
43:47Like I can't believe you're wearing jewelry and you're like playing with your hair and I'm
43:51into you.
43:52I just don't understand it.
43:53It does tend to have that effect on people.
43:55It's this really weird situation.
43:58Yeah, right?
43:59Like literally no other time in your life.
44:02You couldn't pay to have this happen to our lives again.
44:05You could pay me.
44:06I could pay you?
44:08I have a rate.
44:09Good to know.
44:10What are we talking?
44:11Are we like talking hundreds, thousands?
44:12Is this like a pretty woman situation?
44:14You are a sugary mama.
44:15You would definitely be 100% more successful than me in life.
44:19That's good.
44:20I mean if I make it, then at least I have somebody to spend it.
44:23Like.
44:24I'll spend it.
44:25Oh no, I'm sure.
44:26You are throwing me from it.
44:27Good.
44:28I swear, I think I've been referring to you as like a curve ball.
44:33Like, not that if you don't catch the sports reference.
44:36But like.
44:37Uh, baseball?
44:38Softball?
44:39Baseball.
44:40And I've been thinking about it a lot more than I would care to admit.
44:45Same?
44:46Too often.
44:47I feel like every time I talk to you, we have one of those like, whoa moments.
44:51Like a like, whoa, like why did this happen?
44:54But like, you're unexpected.
44:56Like I feel like I came into this and was like, I know myself pretty well.
45:00But you were like the one that like, I just didn't think.
45:04So what are we gonna do?
45:05I don't know.
45:06I think I objectively say I would like to go on a date with you tomorrow.
45:13Absolutely same.
45:14I'm so happy you wanted to go on another date with me.
45:18There's definitely something there.
45:21I don't know what to make of, I don't even know what to call it, but my like situation
45:27with Vanessa.
45:28And I think there's maybe some comfort that I can tell she feels the same.
45:32We just, we don't know what the hell it is about the two of us.
45:40But we both just kind of like hit each other on our asses.
45:43I feel like there's no doubt in my mind that it'll be fun.
45:52But like, I'm not sure if living with her would be madness.
45:55Like, I don't know what to do.
45:58There you go.
45:59To learning things from each other.
46:00She, she, she.
46:01I need a lime.
46:02Do you mind if we move over there?
46:04No.
46:05Let's do it.
46:06Let's do it.
46:07Yeah.
46:08What a, what a fun thing.
46:10You are someone that I never thought I would be interested in.
46:17Not because you are not beautiful, you are stunning.
46:20But I just didn't think you would be my type.
46:23But when we were sitting on the towels, I was like, oh my God, I like this girl so much.
46:28Please.
46:29No, I'm not joking.
46:30No, I know.
46:31I'm sorry.
46:32I'm serious.
46:33Like.
46:34Me too.
46:35That means a lot to me.
46:36Yeah.
46:37I think, same here.
46:38There's a little bit of like, confusion for me.
46:43I'm curious about you.
46:45I think.
46:46We're trying to make a connection here.
46:48And I think, anytime I date someone like, there's a nervousness to it, right?
46:53Like, we can continue to figure this out.
46:55Okay.
46:56The second date together.
46:58Somebody want to break up our exes?
47:00Who?
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