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  • 6/19/2025

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00:00Hey! Morning, wife. Are you asleep all right?
00:21I'm not officially your wifey yet.
00:23I know, I know.
00:24We're signing the register later, aren't we?
00:26Yeah.
00:27Who are you?
00:29Hey, nothing. Come on, bring it in.
00:30Come on, bring it in.
00:31I'm just getting excited about making it official, that's all.
00:34Excited?
00:35Yep.
00:36A bloke getting up before his alarm, excited about a marriage.
00:38Suspicious is a word, I call it.
00:40It's like Tommy bunking off and now he's skipping into school at the crack.
00:45Drinking last week.
00:47I'm worried about him.
00:49And you?
00:50Yeah.
00:51Yeah.
00:52Guys, come on.
00:56No!
00:57Come on!
00:58Give it!
00:59Never mind!
01:00Bye!
01:01No!
01:02Stace?
01:03Okay, listen, I'm coming round and we'll figure this out, all right?
01:09No.
01:10No, no, no, no, no.
01:11She hasn't got a clue.
01:13Are you not leaving any for the rest of us?
01:18Why?
01:19What?
01:20After everything I've done for you this week, the least you can do is talk to me.
01:25I need to go see Tommy.
01:27You two together are trouble.
01:29Okay.
01:30Well, he's planking me, so what do you want me to do?
01:32He ain't gone to the police or nothing, has he?
01:34Doubt it.
01:35He's involved.
01:36He's probably running scared.
01:38Well, just remember I saved your backsides, both of you.
01:42Bit of respect would be nice!
01:45You've stopped it!
02:10Oi, you.
02:12I've got to get to school.
02:13Now, you don't get to pretend nothing happened, either.
02:16I didn't do anything, though.
02:18Yeah? Tell your face that.
02:20Look, I know you're blanking him for some reason,
02:23but you are still involved and a little wronging, as far as I hear.
02:26You probably encouraged him.
02:29If you start shouting your mouth off,
02:31I will happily tell everyone round here it was your idea.
02:35So keep this shut.
02:40Now she's finally legged it,
02:42I can go and get the kids from Lynn's, go and get a bit of shopping.
02:45Yeah, hey, did you get any kip last night?
02:47No.
02:47No, me neither.
02:49Well, part of me's, like, relieved.
02:51What the hell is going on with her?
02:53I don't know, darling, I don't know.
02:54I mean, to react to cat like that, that's mad.
02:56And then she just ran.
02:58She was about to tell us what was going on
03:00and then now she's legged it to Barcelona.
03:04Sorry, do what?
03:05Yeah.
03:06She's booked a flight on my credit card.
03:08She's spending thousands.
03:09God knows how I'm going to pay it all back.
03:12Look, OK, well, that's great.
03:15No, that's great.
03:15Listen, don't cancel your credit cards, all right?
03:18Are you joking?
03:19No, no, no, just hear me out.
03:20OK, listen, we can track her,
03:23we can follow her,
03:24we can bring her back,
03:25she can tell us what's going on
03:26and she can talk to cat and everything will be fine.
03:28We can do this.
03:29Cat's the reason she ran.
03:31None of it makes sense, Alfie.
03:33All right, so something really bad is going on.
03:35She is scared.
03:37No.
03:38No, no eggs.
03:40What?
03:40Look, as far away as possible, please.
03:43Maybe you're just going back to bed.
03:44The only thing the queue's hangover, really, is just...
03:46Or you could have a sobering chat
03:48about what you did with our savings last night.
03:51Hmm?
03:53Bed sounds good.
03:55Mum?
03:56It was a few grand, Linda.
03:58It was five.
04:00Five!
04:01Five!
04:01What?
04:06Just stop mumming her.
04:10Mumming her?
04:11Yeah.
04:12Look, you were the same yesterday.
04:14She was patient with you when you were struggling.
04:16Just be patient with her.
04:21You're right.
04:23Of course you're right.
04:26Is, um...
04:28everything okay with you it's fine just not to start mumming you but um you
04:37would tell me if you weren't coping of course I would I'm fine sausage okay sorry
04:44yeah no good take your pick
04:58so she said she was in trouble with some people yeah but that was a lie so if that's the cover
05:20then what danger is she really in I mean she's left London so she she must be running from someone
05:24here well she was gonna meet someone but she bottled it yeah or or someone here wants to
05:29hurt her yeah but who wants to hurt her Stace oh I don't know Alf I mean there's nutters everywhere
05:32they could be still following her now all right so you know where she is now well she left Heathrow
05:38first thing this morning so she's I don't know she's probably landing about now ish okay this is
05:45what we do we follow her and we protect her we I've got kids okay it just means we can watch what
05:52she spends yeah oh yeah great just keep racking up my bill no no don't worry about that you leave
05:55that with me as long as we can stay on her tail Alfie I mean look yeah this is a great plan if you can go
06:02like today you are gonna have to keep it from Kat you know Alfie look we just have to make sure that Zoe is safe Kat will thank you in the long run
06:18mate I think I'm getting too old for this nothing a banking signing can't solve eh listen Priya I am a sophisticated businesswoman yeah I've got clients to schmooze I've got deals to do yeah I'm gonna be on it oh yeah who is schmoozing today then well actually I
06:25I've got lunch with Harry in the Vic right back now yeah okay just take that yes all right yeah shh happy to spend
06:32your own cash on bacon sarnies I see what's it to you how does no one want to talk to me about spending five grand
06:40oh yeah I don't know I want to talk to me about spending five grand
06:45oh yeah okay just take that yes all right yes happy to spend your own cash on bacon sarnies I see
06:49what's it to you how does no one want to talk to me about spending five grand
06:54I never asked your mum to pay for that cruise she offered
06:57people do silly things when they get drunk don't they
07:00what's that supposed to mean look we just need that money back all right
07:04who I ain't got it
07:06look the cruise don't do refunds the money's gone base
07:09like I say silly drunk should be more careful
07:12that's a sight for sore eyes
07:24sorry to hear about you and Elaine
07:30it got complicated but not as complicated as the washing machine in Cojo's flat
07:36yeah so she's just a whammy
07:38you men you think you're all modern and capable
07:42here's another one who thinks he can cope without a good woman
07:45Lisa I've just come in to see if there's any limo bookage
07:48no not yet
07:50must be calmer eh
07:52oh look just when you're waiting for one good for nothing bloke
07:55three turn up at once
07:57where you been all morning
07:59I've just you know sorting stuff out
08:01sorting stuff out I thought he was excited about signing this marriage register
08:05you haven't even picked your suit up look
08:07er I know cat see er
08:10okay thing is
08:12I need to go away for a bit
08:14what?
08:15when?
08:16today
08:18today?
08:20so where the hell are you going?
08:22no no where are you going?
08:28Australia
08:30Australia
08:32one minute
08:34I'll keep sticking
08:35maybe it's a sign Howie
08:38yeah maybe you need to lay off the booze a little bit
08:41me?
08:42nearly there
08:44ohhh
08:45it's a sign your liver's sending a sign
08:47you know look it's broken the pump
08:49oh Colonel
08:50fine Linda I'll just have a bottle instead
08:51make your mind up a bottle of a pint what is it?
08:54huh?
08:57I am sorry
08:59wow Linda
09:00first rule of business
09:01yeah customers are always right Linda
09:03I know
09:04I know and I'm sorry okay
09:06I'll bring your bottle over please take a seat
09:08I'll have a brandy and coke as well
09:12hey Brogan
09:13what?
09:14it's probably just a twisted pipe I'll take a look
09:18this is a joke you are a complete joke
09:21okay I get it I know it sounds ridiculous
09:23are you pulling my chain?
09:25hey?
09:26you say Australia but are you just gonna run off and not come back?
09:28no
09:29no?
09:30so why now?
09:33Spencer
09:34is having a tough time
09:35you know that anyway I spoke to him this morning
09:37and he's in a real bad way
09:39right so yesterday you were Stacey's hero
09:41today you're Spencer's hero
09:43how about being mine yeah?
09:45and our family
09:46I know I know
09:47Australia is the other side of the world
09:48are you trying to wind me up?
09:49no I'll be as quick as I can
09:51how do you afford your fare?
09:52eh?
09:53you're gonna play your didgeridoo
09:54well no Spencer's covering it all
09:55yeah he better be
09:58okay you know
10:00I love you
10:01you know that
10:06and this is for our family
10:07no it's not
10:08it's you sorting yourself out
10:10same old Alfie
10:11okay listen you gotta believe me alright
10:13okay
10:14we're gonna get married
10:15and then
10:16I'm gonna have to go
10:17but at least I'm gonna be two weeks max
10:22alright fine
10:24but you be careful when you're swimming out there yeah?
10:26big sharks this time of year
10:28big sharks this time of year
10:49Australia?
10:50really?
10:51your brother must be up on the right man mate
10:53I mean you know
10:54if you're a risk upsetting cat like that
10:57just make sure it's worth your marriage eh?
10:59okay
11:05cheers
11:06twisted pipe like that
11:08oh thanks Phil
11:10this place is this
11:11getting on top of you
11:13how were just now
11:14past night
11:15last night?
11:16no
11:17yeah
11:18I don't know
11:20I'm er
11:21I'm six months sober
11:23today
11:24yeah
11:25that's great
11:26don't feel great
11:27no
11:28no of course it don't
11:29I mean
11:30people think the hard bit is putting the glass down
11:32but it's the weeks the months the years that come after that
11:34that's
11:37but going back was just
11:38it's not an option this time right?
11:41of course not
11:43I know it's hard but
11:45but don't make it harder on yourself yet
12:04hey boys
12:08how's tricks?
12:09can't ask me to all come home
12:11she's gone to get drunk
12:13so come on
12:14how's that teacher of yours
12:15you know the one that's got the big hairy moly moly moly
12:19what's his name Mr Sprout?
12:20is it?
12:21at least if he gets that plucked
12:22what are we going to call him eh?
12:23oh
12:24and they know about Australia
12:25what?
12:26good news travels fast eh?
12:30okay well how about this then
12:32I'm not going to Australia
12:34you're not?
12:35really?
12:36that's right
12:37my team need me here didn't you eh?
12:38and Uncle Spencer needs you
12:39yeah okay so does my family need me and your mum's?
12:41she's done without you for years
12:43she'll be fine
12:44yeah so just go
12:45Tommy just
12:46what?
12:47just hang on a second okay?
12:48you don't normally rush home from school
12:50where are all your mates?
12:51why do you care?
12:52because
12:53oh why is everyone on my case all the time?
12:55just go to Australia
12:56Tommy
12:57Tommy
12:58Tommy
12:59don't you judge?
13:00wasn't?
13:01just come in to get some change
13:06oh look
13:07and no I ain't judging alright?
13:08why ain't you supposed to be making your marriage official today?
13:10Tommy!
13:20Don't you judge.
13:22I wasn't.
13:23I just came in to get some change.
13:30Oh, look.
13:32And, no, I ain't judging, all right?
13:35Why aren't you supposed to be making your marriage official today?
13:37Because I don't sink the register.
13:40I will appreciate you turning up half-cut.
13:43Might as well start my marriage as a joke.
13:46Most relationships round here end up like that, don't they?
13:49Yes, Kat.
13:50I know what you're getting at.
13:52And, no, I'm not saying that Jean and Harvey's relationship was a joke.
13:56But it wasn't perfect, either, by any means.
14:00I mean, they didn't talk, did they, about the important things?
14:04But you and Alfie, you're different.
14:06You're great at all that stuff.
14:09You are actually giving me relationship advice.
14:12Oh, God, no.
14:13I mean, if you're long in the tooth, then I must be bleating Bugs Bunny.
14:18Now, all I'm saying is, you talk to him.
14:22And you listen, too.
14:24Let yours be the one marriage round here that doesn't end up a joke, eh?
14:28Oh, God, you've got there at 6.90!
14:38Oh, yeah, come on.
14:40I used to love a massive marshmallow hot chocolate.
14:43Oh, God, come on.
14:48What's going on?
14:50Nothing.
14:52Literally, nothing is going on.
14:54Just go to Australia.
14:55But you and your mum?
14:56I ain't going to hit her if that's what you're worried about.
14:58Oh, I never said you would, right?
15:00Well, that's what everyone thinks.
15:01Expecting the worst of me.
15:03I ain't a bad person, all right?
15:04All right, Tommy, keep your voice down.
15:06I know you're not, OK?
15:07I know.
15:09And I trust you.
15:10I just hate seeing you distracted like this, you know, me and your mum.
15:14We're worried about you.
15:16I know she gave you a hard time about you bunking off with that Joel, kid.
15:19But I know you're better than this.
15:21That you're a good, honest kid.
15:23And that Joel's all right, you know?
15:25I just want to see you get him into trouble.
15:34And what's going on with you?
15:38Oh, it's just mad stuff.
15:40Like what?
15:42No, it's nothing.
15:43It's nothing.
15:45All right.
15:46They're saying about Uncle Spencer.
15:47Yeah, well, of course it is.
15:50Oi, I think I might have just saved your marriage.
15:54Yeah?
15:54Yeah, go and talk to Kat, go on.
15:55She's leaving the vic now, going home.
15:59Well, go on, then.
16:01But if you're nagging me about being honest,
16:03better do the same with Mum.
16:10Clary, I'm going to go and save my marriage.
16:11You save your friendship.
16:12See you later.
16:13Bye, Joel.
16:14Thanks, Kat.
16:17There you are.
16:19Sorry.
16:20Today's just...
16:22Just been a bit mad.
16:24Dad's going away to see his brother.
16:25Spencer?
16:27That melt of a man.
16:28Stop crying over my slapper of a stepmother.
16:30All I'm saying is...
16:32We might not be able to hang out as much.
16:36Yeah.
16:38Do what you like.
16:39I ain't really that bothered.
16:41Cool.
16:43Yeah.
16:44Just don't forget who your real mates are.
16:48I ain't told Vicky about you having that video.
16:52I easily could have done.
16:55I thought it was good.
16:56Anyway.
17:01Better go.
17:02He wasn't drinking now, was he?
17:03Saves me queuing.
17:05Cheers, mate.
17:05Cheers.
17:05Oh, Kat.
17:21By half hour, and you can bugger off to wherever you want to go.
17:25Well, hold on.
17:26You know, I am taking these wedding vows seriously, and we're going to be married proper, and we're
17:30going to be together forever, okay, but, okay, um, just before we leave, there's just something
17:38I need to talk to you about first, all right?
17:41All right.
17:44Go on, then.
17:47All right, um, so the thing is, it's, um...
17:52Blimey.
17:53I'll talk first, then, yeah?
17:55If we're doing this, these vows proper, yeah, I ain't in the market.
18:00For a future full of surprises sprung on me every five seconds because my nerves are
18:04shredded, Alfie.
18:05I'm old, and I need to put the boys first.
18:08The kids, they mean the world to me, and they always have.
18:10I know.
18:11Yeah.
18:11I get it.
18:12And last week, it was lovely.
18:14It was fun, you know, on the bus and all that, but this marriage is for the kids.
18:18I just want to be the best mum.
18:20I want my husband to get the best out of me, yeah?
18:25I don't want him to be a liar.
18:27Now, because if you're fibbing about this Australian thing, we are properly over, yeah?
18:36Did you get that?
18:41Right.
18:42What do you want to talk about?
18:42Now, see, the thing is, you know what, when we first met, when we first fell in love?
18:58Time is ticking, Alfie.
18:59Yeah, I know, but when we first met, you know, I used to say to you back then, I said, I wish
19:05I'd have known you before, you know, when you were younger.
19:09Rude.
19:10What?
19:10No, I don't, no.
19:11I don't mean that.
19:13I mean when you were having, you know, them bad years.
19:17Not that every year hasn't been a tough year, but it's, you know, when you were, you know,
19:22when you're hiding everything from Zoe.
19:25Now, hang on.
19:26I lied to protect her, right?
19:29My mum and dad made me lie, right?
19:31So don't make me act to be a liar.
19:32Dad, that's not what I mean, darling.
19:33I loved that girl.
19:39I love her.
19:41And if she was in my life right now, she'd be included in all of this, all right?
19:48I just want to be a good mum and I want to make up for all that and I need a good bloke
19:51by my side.
19:52I'm going to be that bloke.
20:00Because I love you, Cat Moon, and I'm going to give you everything you want.
20:05Okay, I'm going to do everything in my power so you can be the best mum.
20:11For all your kids.
20:13Hey, come on.
20:14Don't you worry about Tommy, because I had a chat with him earlier, right?
20:17And he wants to prove himself to be a good kid.
20:19Well, actually, he wants to prove himself to be a good young man.
20:21And it'd be nice to have a proper young bloke around, yeah?
20:24That's lucky, when I've just married a buffoon.
20:26Hey, hey, hey.
20:27Not yet, you haven't.
20:29Hey.
20:30Shall we?
20:32Yeah.
20:34Yeah.
20:35Okay.
20:36Right.
20:39Alfie, go to Australia, all right?
20:42I trust you.
20:44All right.
20:45Please don't let me down.
20:49Cat.
20:49I won't let you down.
20:52All right.
20:55All right.
20:57Sod fancy clothes.
20:59I'll just go and whack a bit of lip gloss on you.
21:00Yeah, let's do this.
21:01Come on, Cat Moon.
21:03Look.
21:13Alf.
21:15Sorry.
21:15Can you hear that?
21:20Yeah, well, they say change is healthy, isn't it?
21:22You know what I mean?
21:23Hey, mate, you're going to be Mrs Moon again soon.
21:26Right, they do it right.
21:26Quickly.
21:27Hurry up, mate.
21:27Rub against the clock.
21:28Go, go, go.
21:30Come on, now.
21:31Let's see.
21:31All right, ready to go.
21:32You OK?
21:32Yeah?
21:33Come on, get the belts on.
21:34Sure?
21:34Yeah.
21:36Look, I'm sorry about you girls.
21:38You absolutely should not have been dragged into this.
21:40Well, we're used to being dragged into things.
21:42Don't worry about us.
21:43You, uh, enjoyed your shopping trip, did you?
21:46Yeah.
21:46What did you do?
21:47Just wondering, my shopping's more important than I'm about Linda in the pub.
21:50Uh, don't talk to her like that.
21:52No.
21:52You know, you've got dodgy pumps on the blink in there.
21:54And you've got a door that ain't fully functioning either.
21:57Easy.
21:57Linda is coping fine, thank you.
21:59No.
22:00No, she ain't.
22:02You ain't got a clue, have you?
22:03Your marriage has broken down.
22:05Big deal.
22:05And now, it's time to start looking after your dogma.
22:11Don't listen to him.
22:12Like he's ever been able to hold down a marriage or a relationship with any son.
22:16Yeah, thank you.
22:17Yeah.
22:17All right?
22:39Can't stay away now, can you?
22:41A bit beggy.
22:42Look, I was only blanking, though, because these past few weeks have been a lot.
22:48Yeah.
22:49And I'm sorry.
22:51So this is about the video last week, too.
22:54What Drake Zagan was saying.
22:56You just take everything so seriously.
22:59I mean, watch them videos or not.
23:01You saw that girl on the tube dressed in that slutty skirt, but then when the butter wouldn't
23:05melt when I'd actually done something.
23:07And you know she shut up as soon as Vicky offered her some money.
23:09If she was so violated, then why would she do that?
23:18Chip.
23:23Cheers.
23:24And if you want to delete a video of me and her off your phone, then look yourself out.
23:30As I say, don't want you feeling uncomfortable, because it's not what VMAs is about.
23:34Yeah?
23:35Yeah, of course.
23:36Just put it on to me first, yeah?
23:40All right.
23:49Sweet.
23:52Sweet.
23:57You do know you're not completely off the hook, though, right?
23:59When I was on my phone, it's obvious that you filmed it, and you shared it with me.
24:11Hey, don't look so worried.
24:13We're mates again.
24:15So, I'm not going to snitch on you, just like you're not going to snitch on me, are you?
24:20No.
24:22So, we're cool, then.
24:23Hey.
24:38Feel it better?
24:40Not really.
24:42I'm sorry about this, Ma'am.
24:43What, for snapping at me?
24:45Or telling the rest of the square how useless I am.
24:47And I do not need Phil Mitchell telling me to pull my socks up.
24:52I never said...
24:53You made out like you were having some sort of breakdown.
24:57I'm fine.
24:59Clearly, you are not.
25:03Look, I want to be there for you.
25:05You know I am always here for you.
25:09I'm sorry.
25:11Sometimes, other things just get in the way.
25:13I know, look, I know that, and we've all got stuff going on, okay?
25:17But I'm fine.
25:19I'm fine.
25:25Well, so long as that's the truth.
25:27Yeah.
25:27Yeah.
25:43Hey, come on, you.
25:55Oh, I'm going to introduce you now to the all-new official Mrs. Moon Mark 2.
26:01Come on.
26:03Tell me, darling, you all right?
26:06Um, should we go and get his case?
26:08Huh?
26:09Yeah, his suitcase, Australia.
26:11Oh, right, yeah, thank you.
26:12I packed your passport, your favourite budgie smugglers with them shark-infested waters.
26:17You still want me to go, yeah?
26:19I said I'd trust you.
26:21Listen, if you think Spencer needs you...
26:25Hey, come on.
26:27The sooner I get there, the sooner I get back, yeah?
26:32Okay.
26:33You okay?
26:34Just don't be too long.
26:35No, come on, let's bring in.
26:37Come on.
26:38I love you guys.
26:38You look after your mum, yeah?
26:42Come on.
26:43Okay.
26:43Got the case.
26:44Lovely.
26:45Thanks, Tommy.
26:51Listen.
26:52Just bring me back the best present ever, yeah?
26:57Yeah, I will.
26:59Promise.
26:59Go on, then, off you go.
27:02Uh, Heathrow, please, mate.
27:05You all right, kid.
27:17Stacey.
27:18I'm going.
27:20Yeah.
27:22I'm going to bring her home.
27:23I'm going to bring her home, yeah?
27:24I'm going to bring her home, yeah?
27:25I'm going to bring her home, yeah?
27:26I'm going to bring her home, yeah?
27:27I'm going to bring her home, yeah?
27:28I'm going to bring her home, yeah?
27:29I'm going to bring her home, yeah?
27:30I'm going to bring her home, yeah?
27:31I'm going to bring her home, yeah?
27:32I'm going to bring her home, yeah?
27:33I'm going to bring her home, yeah?
27:34I'm going to bring her home, yeah?
27:35I'm going to bring her home, yeah?
27:36I'm going to bring her home, yeah?
27:37I'm going to bring her home, yeah?
27:38I'm going to bring her home, yeah?
27:39I'm going to bring her home, yeah?
27:40I'm going to bring her home, yeah?