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  • 6/25/2025

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00:00Okay, well, we've been up early to redecorate, so, er, we'll all just forget the epic meltdown.
00:22Keep calm, carry on.
00:24Yesterday was just a blip on what is going to be a lovely festive family day.
00:28Right, Billy and Honey are still coming and you boys are going to be there.
00:32God, this is a joke.
00:34Why don't you ever see Father Christmas in hospital?
00:37Because he's got private elf care.
00:39That's a joke.
00:41And this is half Christmas.
00:43And it's mandatory.
00:45I wouldn't be half Christmas if we weren't papering over cracks.
00:49I wouldn't miss it for the world, Mum.
00:57Right.
00:59Paddy's party.
01:01Which one of these makes my eyes pop the most?
01:03Listen, I was thinking maybe we should give Julie a call, you know, having another familiar face around the place might help knock stuff like yesterday on the head.
01:12I made my decision and we made a pact.
01:16I think it's got to be this one.
01:18But don't need any.
01:19Not bad for a last minute brainstorm, eh?
01:31Paddy.
01:32No one calls him Paddy.
01:33Well, maybe you should.
01:35It's very endearing.
01:36And do not worry, there is no whiskey or creme liqueur in that.
01:40Only rum and bitters.
01:41I've done my research because I wanted to give him a little bit of peacock panache for his birthday.
01:46Now, I know Yolandi shook on 300, but I think another 80 should cover it.
01:54As in when you've got it, Ops.
01:55Um, Mum.
01:56Hmm.
01:57Yolandi and Kim wanted this to be a classy event.
02:00Yeah.
02:00I don't think umbrella straws and rum punch is what they're after.
02:04Well, no one does class like us and there's more surprises to come.
02:08So tell Kim I've got it covered, yeah?
02:10OK.
02:11I am going to go get some coffees.
02:13I think we're going to need them.
02:14Oh, lovely.
02:16Mum, are you doing that thing where you throw yourself into something because something else is worrying you?
02:21And that something being George.
02:25George?
02:26George is ancient history.
02:28This is our pub.
02:31And getting it back on its feet has absolutely nothing to do with him.
02:35And he can whistle up a gum tree if he wants a slice out of it.
02:38Listen.
02:39Why don't you go to your meeting?
02:41In fact, have the day off.
02:43Look, I'm sorry I left you with all the hard work.
02:46But Mother is back now.
02:52Oh, there is Mother.
02:53Now, it's not just Raymond and Pearl that you're looking for.
02:55You've got cats, kids, too.
02:58So you tell your mates that they are the priority, right?
03:03Listen, no messing about.
03:04Don't worry, Mum.
03:05My boy's a good boy.
03:07So that was Howie.
03:08We've got Carter Cowabin Coop on our hands.
03:12I need to get over there.
03:13No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
03:14There's no time for that.
03:15What?
03:15We need Patrick to think that it's a fancy lunch.
03:18Remember?
03:19Not 12 rounds we've left at Laney.
03:21So let's fight.
03:22More pearly whites.
03:23Hey, look at the wonderful girls.
03:28Are you all ready for a good time?
03:30All the time.
03:31Let's go.
03:33Go on, babe.
03:36The call centre's rent's gone up and the mini-mart's overreads are a fortune, too.
03:40Well, I'm sure Ravi's got the same over at Walford East.
03:43It's, um, brisking the world, ain't it?
03:45And anyway, who are we to question the Palisar's empire, eh?
03:48Talking of questioning, have you seen these invoices from Mac and Sons?
03:54I'm presuming they're for work on some of the properties, but they are charging a bomb.
03:59Do you feel we should check with Sookie?
04:01Um, uh, don't, don't worry.
04:05I'll, um, I'll sort it.
04:08Less quarter day, yeah?
04:09Does Patrick even like cricket?
04:11He better.
04:12I mean, Graham's probably set a wicket up outside of Vic by now.
04:16Well, you're a trustman, Taylor.
04:17Are you coming to Patrick's party later?
04:20Um, maybe I'll, we'll see.
04:29So, have you already told her about us being official, or is that a way of showing us to all who knows?
04:34No, she's just jealous that you're stolen me away, that's all.
04:36I will tell her at the party, and all you need to do is pass the boyfriend.
04:40Right, who's for a top-up?
04:47Don't be shy.
04:48Yeah, sure.
04:50Billy, don't fill yourself up on those, it'll spoil your lunch.
04:55I was in there, pigs in blankets at Christmas, did I?
04:58Not in here, no.
04:59Oh, there's my baby.
05:02Oh, you're getting in the spirit, aren't you, darling?
05:05Well, Bob, keep calm and carry on, right?
05:11Oh, I'll get it.
05:12Right then, I'm going to top up these pigs in blankets.
05:16Seem to be running low.
05:17It's all right.
05:28What the hell's he doing here?
05:30Well, I invited him.
05:32Half Christmas is about family time.
05:35And he is family.
05:37Right?
05:37Brad, are you sure about this?
05:49It's just, I really don't think parties and limbo sort of scream, I see.
05:54It's a party, darling.
05:55Your mum asked for help, and you two have done nothing but poke holes in it, so pipe down,
06:00all right?
06:00OK.
06:01Hey, what do you think?
06:02Hey!
06:03Yay!
06:05Oh, there he is, the birthday boy!
06:07What do I see here?
06:09Surprise!
06:11Yeah, classy lunch.
06:13I should have known.
06:15Well, you know, we thought you, you, you know, deserves something special.
06:20And very, very classy.
06:23Yeah, well, my wife-to-be and the girls all know what I like.
06:28Yay!
06:30Come on, look.
06:33We shall come first.
06:35Yes, we'll pick.
06:36Is that you reporting?
06:41You know Chelsea's done a playlist, yeah?
06:44Yeah, of course, darling, but I added a few extra bits.
06:46Nothing says classy like Annie Kerby.
06:52Who invited him?
06:53Oh, well, they're good mates, aren't they?
06:57Sorry.
06:57No, no.
06:57He needs to go.
07:05Now.
07:06Like I told you, I was invited.
07:08Yeah, well, you are family.
07:10Oh, you think this is funny, do you?
07:13Doing this to your brother?
07:16Doing what?
07:17Making him face the truth.
07:19Making us all face it.
07:21This ain't out of spite, Mum.
07:22It's for his own good.
07:23For his own good?
07:24Look at him.
07:26I'm gonna go.
07:27Maybe we should go.
07:28Oh, sit down.
07:30Right, this is a family occasion.
07:32Okay?
07:33And he ain't family.
07:35Teddy.
07:37Get him out now.
07:38Listen, mate.
07:47I'm sorry, I would never have done this to you.
07:50I just thought...
07:53I don't know what I thought.
07:54Help me.
07:55What you doing?
07:59Listen.
08:01I ain't here to score points, play games, whatever.
08:04I'm here for you.
08:05If you ever need me, you know to call.
08:06See you later, mate.
08:12You all right, Mum?
08:14It's fine.
08:16We're all fine.
08:18Right.
08:19Who's up for charades?
08:21Me.
08:21Yes!
08:21Yes!
08:36I can't post this.
08:4280 quid.
08:43They're charging us an extra 80 quid for cultural aggravation.
08:46That's what they're going to say on the comments.
08:48It's appropriation.
08:49Well, it's aggravation for me.
08:50Can you just relax?
08:52I quite like this unit.
08:54This punch is pretty good, to be fair.
08:55It's supposed to be a classy party.
08:58You know?
08:59A drum over the rocks.
09:01Civilised chit-chat.
09:03Not limbo and Del Boy's Blue Lagoon.
09:05He's having a good time.
09:07And then we both know that deep down,
09:09you can't hold it as classy in your book.
09:12Well, just forget what some idiot says online.
09:14Enjoy yourself.
09:15There's something else in there.
09:19You know what?
09:21I say, if you can't beat them,
09:23you have to dip them out, innit?
09:24In there.
09:24Okay, here we go.
09:26Here we go.
09:27Here we go.
09:31Do I need to count the jugs when you're gone?
09:33I mean, you're only here to price up
09:35what you're going to steal from me, right?
09:36I'm here for Patrick.
09:38Well.
09:39Well, you're going to get one
09:40if you don't clear off.
09:42I'm sorry I lost my temper.
09:47I'm 58 years old.
09:48This place was my library.
09:49What do you want me to do?
09:50I don't care what you do.
09:52We signed a postmark.
09:54And if you were half the man I thought you were,
09:57you wouldn't be here cap in hand for my money.
10:02Yeah.
10:03And if you were half the woman I thought you were,
10:06we'd still be together.
10:12Overproof.
10:15I ain't drinking this.
10:17Mean evil.
10:18All right, shoot yourselves.
10:19It does the trick.
10:20How long is that film going to last?
10:22I don't know.
10:22Until I put the next one on.
10:23Obviously, Ricky's ducked us,
10:25so there's plenty more to go around,
10:26so let's drink up.
10:27Well, this is tragic.
10:29Get out before I throw you out.
10:30Come with a peace offering.
10:32That's all you can do with it.
10:36Look, guys,
10:37I've been an idiot, all right?
10:40I know there's probably
10:41nothing I can do or say to
10:43make up for it,
10:44but for what it's worth,
10:46I'm sorry, anyway.
10:50We can stop your sorries.
10:53But
10:53I will take that.
10:55Stay out my way, yeah?
10:57Where's that bottle of vodka you got, is it?
10:59I just walked past Patrick's, too.
11:01I reckon I could charm us
11:02a job or two off the lane.
11:03Dad, don't bother.
11:04We've got enough.
11:06Nobody's drinking that.
11:08It's a good idea.
11:09Oh, leave it to me.
11:10No, no, look,
11:11it's my family due.
11:13I'll sort it.
11:16Let's do it.
11:20Let's go!
11:21Let's go!
11:22Let's go!
11:23Let's go!
11:23Let's go!
11:24Let's go!
11:24Let's go!
11:24Let's go!
11:25Let's go!
11:25Let's go!
11:25Let's go!
11:25Let's go!
11:26Let's go!
11:26Let's go!
11:27Let's go!
11:27Let's go!
11:28Let's go!
11:28Let's go!
11:29It's nice to see Nigel having fun, isn't it?
11:31Yeah, he's really, er, bounced back, hasn't he?
11:34The cat wants to meet a cool Julian for some help, but, er, well, Nigel won't, I bet.
11:38Well, I just hope he was a blip, you know.
11:40It's all about distractions, isn't it?
11:42Yeah, I think it's really good how you've been taking care of Nigel.
11:47But don't forget to look after yourself and all, man.
11:51And Raymond's been missing you, too.
11:53Mm, yeah.
11:54Cheers.
11:54No bloodshed yet there.
12:03Ha!
12:04For now.
12:05I've texted mum, she's on her way over.
12:08Oh, no, here we go.
12:11That's more fun on the way.
12:12She hates me because of Keanu.
12:15And now Felix is going to tell her where I'm fishing.
12:19Do you really like him?
12:21Yeah.
12:24Well, then you better make sure that she likes you.
12:28Because the last thing that we need is the past coming back to haunt us.
12:35Come on, come on.
12:42Okay.
12:43Go on, then.
12:45So, are you going to sort her?
12:46Sort her.
12:47Wait.
12:49You all right?
12:56Sorry to hear about you and George.
12:57If I was 20 years old, I didn't know.
13:00You still wouldn't stand a chance.
13:05Look, come on, Elaine.
13:08I'm 17 sooner.
13:10You know me.
13:11You know the family.
13:13A glass each of this isn't going to hurt anyone, is it?
13:17We're celebrating Patrick, and my dad's over there.
13:20He said he's cool with it.
13:21Yeah, all right.
13:27One glass each, but that's all.
13:29Yeah?
13:30And then go and enjoy yourselves.
13:32That's what I intend to do.
13:34Cool.
13:40That's what I was going to say.
13:41Phil.
13:50Peter Rabbit.
13:52Oh, Peter Rabbit too.
13:53Oh, if you're not going to play properly, then don't play at all.
13:56You've caused enough trouble today as it is.
14:02Pretty woman.
14:03No.
14:03Come on, Barn.
14:04Get involved.
14:06Right.
14:09The devil wears Prada.
14:12Where's Prada?
14:13Yeah.
14:14Oh, no, not that you're the devil.
14:17It's just...
14:18Barn, where are you going?
14:19Barn?
14:21Barn?
14:21Oh, this is more me.
14:30It's cheap, Rooka.
14:31Well done, Dens.
14:32Fair play, mate.
14:33That was all you.
14:34It's your idea, though.
14:35Right.
14:36Well, me and you, we're sticking with the proper stuff.
14:38Don't want to be mixing our drinks, do you?
14:39Yes.
14:39Cheers.
14:40The devil's finished!
14:41It was rubbish, by the way!
14:44All right, well, I'll put another one on.
14:45You chose it.
14:46Oh, proper boards.
14:47Do you guys want the console on?
14:48Yeah?
14:49Put the console on.
14:49All right.
14:51Are you going to put some music on or what?
14:54Yeah, all right.
14:55Dens, you got a speaker?
14:57Uh, check around the kitchen.
14:58It's very own.
14:58It's Patrick's party, Mum.
15:01If he wants to have a drink with George, that is his choice.
15:04Yeah, and it's your choice to come back and get busy.
15:07When I told you to have a day off.
15:09I am fine.
15:11Look, I know you're angry.
15:12All right, but it's only money.
15:14George is trying to start a new chapter the same as you.
15:17Johnny texts me because he's worried about you, Mum.
15:21And so am I.
15:23Maybe if you calm down and lay off the drink a bit,
15:26you might realise that you're better off with a clean break and no bad feeling.
15:31Because this is becoming a problem, Mum.
15:33This is our pub, and I am entitled to have a drink.
15:36Look, my only problem is keeping George's hand out of my purse,
15:40and that is exactly what I'm going to do.
15:43Look, I know we weren't exactly subtle,
15:45but we just wanted to tell you that we're going to give it a proper go.
15:48I think officially.
15:49And you are my cousin and my best mate,
15:51so, uh,
15:52your approval's all I need.
15:54Right, on that note,
15:58I need a top-up,
15:59and I will leave you to give him the once-over here.
16:08So,
16:09it's going well, then,
16:11the panacea stuff.
16:17OK.
16:18I know you don't like me,
16:20and I understand,
16:21but I really like Felix,
16:25and he loves you,
16:26so,
16:27can we just try and put everything in the past?
16:32Yeah, no, you're right.
16:34No, why shouldn't I be happy about you
16:36being with my cousin and your family
16:37while I'm all on my own?
16:41Your mum killed my brother,
16:44and you helped her get away with it.
16:46It's not the past for me, Johnny.
16:48It's my life.
16:51I had to get out of there meself,
17:00but your mum is
17:02one glass of Buck's Fizz away
17:04from strangling your brother with them lights.
17:12I'm sorry, mate.
17:14You didn't deserve that.
17:16Your brother's a prat with a point to make,
17:18and in this world, there ain't much worse.
17:23He did it to you, too.
17:25Ain't you angry?
17:26Well, I'd be a lot angrier
17:29if I didn't think he had a point.
17:34Now, when we found out
17:36you were a boy,
17:39I remember thinking,
17:41why, they're all sussed.
17:42Nudy drill,
17:44bit of football,
17:45get round the ear every now and then,
17:47work for Harry.
17:49Thought that's how it was done, you know?
17:50And then you came along.
17:55And you were different.
18:00Well, you liked books for a start
18:02and hated anything with a ball that weren't Pokemon.
18:05Come on.
18:08You were cautious.
18:10Clever.
18:12Kind.
18:14And you used to give me a hug
18:15before you went to bed.
18:20I couldn't work you out.
18:23But I loved every second of it, mate.
18:26Every second.
18:27I've taken more hidings in my life
18:34than I'd like to admit.
18:37But finding out about this part,
18:40nothing's hurt me more.
18:46Nothing.
18:49But the truth is,
18:51nothing's changed for me.
18:54I look at you now
18:56and I still feel the same.
18:59The same as I felt
19:00when I held you in my arms
19:02as a baby.
19:06You're mine,
19:07but
19:07you're my son.
19:10And I am proud to be your dad
19:12and nothing's gonna change that.
19:18Your mum,
19:20she's embarrassed.
19:22She's taken it out on Zach.
19:24But for me,
19:28he's the unlucky one
19:29because he's the one
19:30that's not had you in his life.
19:34And if he cares enough
19:36to want to know you,
19:39then I'll love you enough
19:41to put my ego aside
19:44and let him in your life, mate.
19:49That's what you want.
19:50I want you to ignore it,
20:02but we can't, can we?
20:05And this ain't his fault.
20:07It's not ours either.
20:09I love you, Dad.
20:10I don't need him.
20:15What pushing him away
20:16ain't fair, is it?
20:18What he's doing
20:19is pushing us further
20:21from each other too.
20:22You're the smartest person
20:26I know, bud.
20:28So I know you'll make
20:29the right call
20:30for all of this.
20:33I want my clunkies.
20:48That's a shower.
20:49Are you all right, mate?
20:51Are you good?
20:52I'm fine.
20:53You don't look good.
20:55Bro.
20:55You don't.
20:56Do you want some water?
20:56I tried no more.
20:58I don't want to.
20:58Sorry.
20:59Guys, where's the other drug?
21:09Should I be checking
21:10for zip tyres and vans or what?
21:13We don't do gifts
21:15at half Christmas,
21:16but thank you.
21:18I know these are book vouchers,
21:20but I think this place
21:21sells board games as well.
21:23Might get Mum a new one
21:24for next year.
21:25I think today
21:26put her off Sherrods for good.
21:27Yes, mate, I'm sorry.
21:30Yeah, I'll just...
21:30No, it's OK.
21:32I'm sorry too.
21:34I mean,
21:35Harry did kidnap me,
21:36so I'm not really sure
21:37why you'd trust him.
21:38But still, I'm sorry.
21:40It's more hope
21:41than expectation, mate.
21:43Story of my life.
21:47Look,
21:48I know this is weird,
21:49but maybe
21:51it doesn't have to be
21:52this weird, right?
21:53Yeah.
22:00I don't need a dad.
22:02I've got one.
22:04I could always do
22:05with more friends
22:05because I'm not exactly
22:07Mr. Popular around you.
22:09You know,
22:10even if you are
22:10in your mid-thirties
22:11and share my DNA.
22:14So,
22:15maybe we could start there?
22:16I'd really like that, mate.
22:28I told him not to drink it.
22:30I can't believe
22:31they did the whole jug.
22:32OK.
22:33Look, I need water,
22:34I need water.
22:34Yeah, go ahead.
22:36Look, Raymond,
22:37you're OK, mate, yeah?
22:38I just need you to drink this
22:39and lay down.
22:39Come on.
22:40You're all right, mate, yeah?
22:40Come on.
22:41I feel sick.
22:43Dental,
22:43we need to call someone.
22:44No, no, no, no.
22:45We don't need to call anybody.
22:46They're going to be fine.
22:46I will sort it out.
22:49Can someone get him some water?
22:51It's all right, Bert.
22:53It's all right, Bert.
22:54It's all right, Bert.
22:58All right, all right.
22:59I want to thank all you
23:01for coming to me
23:01surprise party.
23:03You know,
23:04I had no idea at all,
23:05you know?
23:07Man,
23:08I want to thank me
23:09beautiful wife-to-be
23:11and me girls and them,
23:13you know,
23:13for organizing
23:14this surprise.
23:16You're welcome.
23:18OK, OK.
23:19So,
23:19why don't we all
23:20raise a glass,
23:22yeah?
23:23To Patrick!
23:27And to real men,
23:29unlike George over here,
23:31who would like me
23:32to maintain his lifestyle
23:34without his second name.
23:36Grant.
23:37No, no, no.
23:37Everyone loves George,
23:39don't they?
23:40But in the meantime,
23:41he's got his hand
23:41in my purse.
23:42You wouldn't get
23:43Patrick doing that
23:44or Phil
23:45or any man
23:47with any decency.
23:48Oh, calm down.
23:50Hey, Patrick,
23:51got your cake.
23:52She's drunk
23:53and she's
23:54the one who cheated.
23:56It's always the ones
23:57you least expect.
23:58Oh, yeah.
24:00Like you weren't
24:00in and out
24:01of your old
24:02rosebush
24:03every chance
24:03you got.
24:05I'm as sober
24:06as a judge,
24:08but I now see
24:09people for who
24:09they really are.
24:11So, cheers,
24:12everyone.
24:14It is.
24:14It is Raymond
24:15and the twins.
24:15They need an ambulance
24:16now.
24:17They've been drinking
24:17the punch.
24:18What?
24:18Come on,
24:18come on.
24:19So,
24:25he definitely
24:26failed the best friend
24:27boyfriend check them.
24:30I'm sorry,
24:31you're all right?
24:37Look,
24:37I know
24:38that I've been
24:39spending a lot
24:39of time with him
24:40recently.
24:41I promise
24:42I will make time
24:43for you too.
24:44because official
24:46or not,
24:46when you've got me,
24:48you're not alone.
24:51Okay?
24:54Okay.
24:59Come here.
25:02Ah,
25:03I love you.
25:04I love you.
25:04Come on.
25:14Right,
25:14where are they?
25:17Move.
25:19I said move!
25:22Come here,
25:22darling.
25:24You okay?
25:25Baby?
25:26Baby?
25:27Paul,
25:27you all right?
25:28Yeah.
25:28You sure?
25:30You're all
25:31going to be fine.
25:32Okay?
25:35You all are.
25:36Oh,
25:43there you are.
25:45You got it
25:46out of your system
25:46then.
25:48You know,
25:48if you're hungry,
25:49there's plenty
25:49of food left over.
25:50Well,
25:51bar the pigs
25:51in blankets.
25:52We'll have to get
25:53more in next year
25:54for Billy.
25:55Maybe we can
25:56give Monopoly
25:57a spin too,
25:57eh?
25:59Okay.
25:59Well,
26:00I'm going to
26:01head upstairs now.
26:02Let this play out.
26:06Today was supposed
26:11to be a nice
26:11family day.
26:12You know,
26:13to remember
26:13the good times
26:14and he's ruined it.
26:15I mean,
26:15you're an idiot
26:16but the front
26:17of him
26:18turning up here
26:19like that.
26:19Ain't his fault
26:20and it ain't
26:21Harry's either.
26:23It's yours
26:23and we went
26:25and saw Zach.
26:26Barney
26:27is going to have
26:27him in his life
26:28whether you like
26:29it or not
26:29and the way
26:31I see it,
26:32he needs more
26:33good people
26:34in his life.
26:36Merry
26:39half Christmas,
26:40Mum.
26:45How could
26:46you be so
26:46stupid?
26:47I let a
26:4816-year-old
26:48have one
26:49cocktail
26:49at a family
26:50do that
26:51he told me
26:51his father
26:52had okayed.
26:53How is I
26:53to know
26:54he's going
26:54to steal
26:54a couple
26:54of jugs
26:55and feed
26:55them to
26:55kids?
26:56Listen
26:57to yourself.
26:58You believed
26:58him without
26:59talking to
27:00Howie.
27:01You have
27:01put them
27:01kids in
27:02hospital
27:02and have
27:02a licence
27:03at risk.
27:03Chelsea
27:04said the
27:04paramedics
27:05told her
27:05they're going
27:05to be fine
27:06but don't
27:06worry
27:06Johnny
27:06you make
27:07me the
27:07villain
27:07because you'd
27:08rather be
27:08here with
27:09your pal
27:09George
27:10wouldn't
27:10you?
27:10What?
27:11I'm your
27:11mum and
27:12this is
27:12our pub.
27:13Yeah and
27:13you're acting
27:13like a
27:14spoilt brat.
27:15Mum calm
27:15down.
27:15No no
27:16alright she
27:17needs to
27:17hear it.
27:18Yeah your
27:19marriage is
27:20over and
27:20yeah it's
27:21sad but
27:22that doesn't
27:22give you the
27:22right to
27:23act like a
27:23teenager
27:24who's had
27:24her heart
27:25broken.
27:26I can't do
27:27this alright
27:28I can hardly
27:29look after
27:29myself I
27:30can't look
27:30after you
27:31and this pub
27:31as well.
27:32let me have
27:33a little
27:33think I
27:34might have
27:34looked after
27:35you a few
27:35times yeah
27:36you really
27:37want to start
27:37tallying up
27:38who's made
27:38more mistakes
27:39I've a long
27:39way to go
27:40before I
27:40catch up
27:41with you
27:41I don't
27:42need you
27:43looking after
27:44me or
27:44this pub
27:45I can look
27:46after both
27:46on my
27:47own.
27:48Be the
27:48landlords
27:48we've been
27:50informed that
27:50a mine own
27:51Walford
27:51general reserved
27:52alcohol from
27:53these premises
27:53we're to
27:54investigate
27:54well done
27:57mother.
28:02mother.
28:03mother.
28:04mother.