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00:00We're known as the Smarty Pants Society.
00:03Intellectuals who gather in the dead of night to swap ideas and share discoveries.
00:07This week, you'll hear from Lily Dew, Ty LeClaire, and Cameron Esposito.
00:13Welcome to Smarty Pants.
00:15Presenters are responsible for their own research.
00:17The makers of this program cannot guarantee anything to say is accurate.
00:20Welcome, members of the Smarty Pants Society.
00:23I'm your host, Rekha Shankar.
00:25And tonight's speakers have prepared presentations on a topic of their choice.
00:28But before we begin, let us say our sacred motto.
00:33Give me a V. Give me an E. Give me an R. Give me a Y. Give me a G. Give me an O. Give me another O. Give me a D.
00:42What does that spell?
00:43Very good.
00:45Now, let's bring up our first presenter.
00:52Since the Industrial Revolution, women have entered the workforce en masse and made incredible gains towards gender equality.
00:59In the 20th century alone, second-wave feminism has brought on the Equal Pay Act and Title IX.
01:04Yet true gender equality continues to elude us.
01:08Until now.
01:09Women should have second families.
01:14For too long, only men have been able to reap the benefits of having a second family.
01:20Benefits.
01:21Coincidentally, kind of looks like Rekha.
01:23Sorry.
01:26There we go.
01:27Creeping.
01:28Creeping too much.
01:31Loneliness is an epidemic and leads to an increased risk of heart disease, stroke, and dementia.
01:36The Surgeon General's office called it a health crisis.
01:39But with the love and support of two families instead of one, you will be quantifiably less lonely.
01:47Back up, family.
01:48Yeah.
01:49Let's say your first family dies in a freak accident.
01:52I think about my family dying all the time.
01:54Now you don't have to waste time starting from scratch.
01:56And lastly, biological imperative.
01:58It fulfills one's primitive need to procreate, to spread one's seed, or in this case, one's eggs.
02:05Now, at this point, I want to address that not all families look the same.
02:09And I personally cannot speak for every sexual orientation or gender identity.
02:14I can only speak for all cis heterosexual couples who choose to have kids.
02:19Okay.
02:20Let's look at the current gender distribution of people who choose to have second families.
02:25Wow.
02:25Wow.
02:26Yeah.
02:27That's, yeah.
02:28Yeah.
02:28Yeah.
02:30But I'm hoping through this presentation and spreading awareness about this issue, we can reach this.
02:36Wow.
02:3750 by 50.
02:38Yeah.
02:39I'm hoping for 50% of the people with second families to be women by the year 2050.
02:46Yeah.
02:47Now, we'll have to start small with just maybe one woman.
02:52And I'm willing to be that woman.
02:55Sandra Day O'Connor, the first woman Supreme Court Justice.
02:59Amelia Earhart, the first woman to fly solo across the Atlantic, as well as the first woman to disappear while flying solo across the Pacific.
03:06I am ready to be Lily Dew.
03:10The first woman with a secret second family.
03:15You might be wondering, why me?
03:16First off, I already have one family.
03:18Yeah.
03:19I'm halfway there, barring any freak accidents.
03:23Yeah.
03:23Secondly, I'm incredible at compartmentalizing.
03:27I would never let my feelings for one family get in the way of the other.
03:31In fact, when I'm with my second family, I would just pack up all my feelings for the first family into a figurative box and put it to the side in a way that is simply pathological.
03:40Cool.
03:41And lastly, and most importantly, I'm willing, where nobody else was, how I would do it.
03:48First off, there's the classic work trips.
03:51I'm a working woman, and work might take me out of town six months out of the year every year.
03:58Now, there's also the new self-care.
04:01If I should need to travel for a month-long yoga retreat or a restorative girls' trip, you know, six months out of the year, cumulatively every year, then who is my husband to question that?
04:14Yeah.
04:14Lastly, we have the hybrid.
04:16It's becoming the CEO of an innovative female-focused startup.
04:20You know the kind.
04:21It's disrupting pimple patches or blush brushes.
04:25I would need to travel six months out of the year every year for work and also just to, like, center myself, you know?
04:33Women have been hiding pregnancy well into their third trimester, eight, nine months.
04:39Courtney Cox on Friends to Julia Louis-Dreyfus on Seinfeld have been hiding their pregnancies sitcom style.
04:45Whether that be behind a big Amazon package, behind a big grocery bag, or behind a big stack of Ulysses S. Grant biographies, this is a tried-and-tested, fail-proof method to hide your baby bump up until delivery.
05:04Now, at this point, I feel like I've addressed everything.
05:07Maybe you have one or two questions left.
05:09Does this mean double the domestic labor?
05:13No.
05:13Oh, great.
05:14I'll only be with each family half the year, so actually that's a normal amount of labor.
05:18Will your absence hurt your child's development?
05:21No.
05:21Oh.
05:22Growing up, my father worked overseas six months out of the year every year.
05:28And I am perfectly normal.
05:30And so, next question.
05:33Will it be a financial strain to have two families?
05:37No.
05:38I'll be rich.
05:39Oh.
05:39Yeah.
05:40Isn't pregnancy incredibly difficult and painful?
05:44Yeah, absolutely.
05:46Lastly.
05:46Mm.
05:47Are you worried your kids will find each other causing irreparable psychological harm?
05:52No.
05:53Oh.
05:54I plan to breed a deep distrust of technology that will prevent them from ever wanting to do a mail-in DNA kit or even FaceTime me while I'm away.
06:03Oh, nice.
06:03Yeah.
06:04Wow.
06:04I can't do it alone.
06:06I need you and you to pledge your support, to raise awareness, and commit to starting a second family.
06:15Or encouraging a woman in your life to start a second family by 2050 and post about it using the hashtag 50 by 50.
06:27Thank you and have a good night.
06:29Wow.
06:32Lily, thank you for that enlightening presentation.
06:36Mm-hmm.
06:36And now to kick off the Q&A.
06:38I gotta say, you know, as somebody who's in a sapphic marriage and does gender fuckage, I think you're really leaving something on the table here mathematically.
06:45Mm-hmm.
06:46Because, see, now, if a woman is with a woman or whatever I am, right, then here's this opportunity over here, two additional families.
06:54And down here, two additional families.
06:57And then two additional families.
06:58Multi-level markets.
06:59A pyramid scheme of families.
07:00It becomes, exactly.
07:02I guess it's my pitch that we pay lesbians more so that we can really enact your dream, I would say, maybe even earlier than 2050.
07:12Wow.
07:12What do you think about this?
07:13Oh, wow.
07:15Just to clarify, I personally will not be paying anyone to have a second family.
07:19I'm hoping for people to do this for free.
07:22Right.
07:22I love your idea.
07:24I just didn't want to speak for other people, but if you would like to speak for all...
07:29I speak for all homosexuals.
07:31Wow.
07:32And Ty knows this.
07:34This is a verifiable fact.
07:35And Jen, you know this too?
07:36Yes.
07:37Yep.
07:37Okay, wow.
07:37And then Anna, you know this?
07:39Yep, I know this.
07:39Wow, Anna, okay.
07:40Could there be a world, if you have a supportive husband, where you tell him, hey, if you believe in gender equality, I'm going to start a second family.
07:48I personally plan to have a secret second family.
07:52That's your choice.
07:52But you can have a public second family as well.
07:57Yeah.
07:58How do you handle holiday cards?
08:00Are you sending a happy Hanukkah, a Merry Christmas, a Happy New Year?
08:04A photographic evidence.
08:05Oh, wow.
08:06Okay.
08:06I want to know if your two biological children from the two different marriages meet each other, let's say, at college or sleepaway camp and fall in love.
08:17How would you stop them?
08:19Royal families have been doing this for centuries.
08:21And look how pasty and interesting looking they are.
08:26They do have a lot of castles.
08:26If I want to be a good ally, how can I encourage my wife to start a second family without openly suggesting that to her?
08:35That's a brave question.
08:36Yeah.
08:36You could drop lots of hints.
08:39Okay.
08:39So maybe, like, while I'm ignoring her and looking at my phone in bed, I could be like, wow, seems like a lot of women are starting second families.
08:47Seems like a lot of eligible bachelors in Arizona.
08:50Aren't you traveling there for work next week?
08:53That's good.
08:53What if you just introduce her to me?
08:56Wow.
08:56Okay.
08:56All right.
08:57Yeah, well, get your number after that.
08:59And then you think it'll happen, kind of like...
09:01Mm-hmm.
09:01Well...
09:02If your plan succeeds, what do you see the trajectory of the lip liner industry looking like with so many CEOs?
09:11You can't forget about your shell company.
09:13It's a lot of disruption.
09:15We're hoping to go public by 2050.
09:17Oh, okay.
09:18A follow-up question on that.
09:20What about the inevitable sex scandal that happens within the company?
09:24You know, we all know these feminist companies.
09:26And then the big thing is you're a predator.
09:29Lilith, you don't...
09:30That's how it goes.
09:32That's how it goes.
09:34Yeah.
09:34Or is your sexual scandal going to be that you allowed two of your children to have a family together?
09:38And maybe be...
09:39I think that's sweet.
09:40Yeah.
09:42If the two...
09:43If the two young people I love the most fall in romantic sexual love with each other...
09:49Busting.
09:50Well spoken, your leash.
09:51Well spoken.
09:53I have a question.
09:54Wait, hold on.
09:55I have to answer.
09:56Oh, yeah.
09:56What was the question?
09:57What kind of sexual predator I'm going to be?
10:00Yeah, like talk me through the headline.
10:03What is your sex...
10:04At least give me one headline.
10:05Yeah, blue sky dream in here.
10:06The kind of toxic CEO I plan to be is like the CEO of Thinx, changing in front of people,
10:14changing in front of employees.
10:15It's a classic.
10:16Oh, that's the best answer you could have given.
10:17It's a classic.
10:18How are you going to disrupt the lip liner industry?
10:21Thicker.
10:22How thick?
10:22What?
10:23What are you about to do?
10:25What are you about to do?
10:25How did you do on it?
10:27Kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss.
10:28Kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss.
10:29We got a second family here.
10:34I actually didn't give that permission.
10:39That was a straight kiss.
10:41That was a straight kiss.
10:41Okay.
10:42All right.
10:42Yeah, unfortunately, that was an extremely boring straight kiss.
10:46How thick?
10:48Do you mean like it would be, you could feel it from here?
10:50That's how thick it is?
10:51Yeah, people usually have been thinking about lip liner thickness as on the face.
10:55I'm thinking out.
10:56Vagina lip liner?
10:57And it rolls off the tongue.
11:00Wow.
11:01Lily, thank you so much.
11:03Thank you so much for being able to have your face at.
11:05Thank you so much.
11:11I have one question for you.
11:14What is history?
11:16Is it a simple retelling of facts from the past?
11:19Or is it the winning side stumping the truth in their favor?
11:23Well, I can tell you for a fact, as a Native person, Native history is often overwritten.
11:27Our stories are not included, sometimes on purpose, within the history books.
11:31And today, I'd like to shine light on something that I believe has been kept from you for the
11:35last 200 years.
11:38Sacagawea, the Shoshone woman who led the Lewis and Clark expeditions.
11:41A couple of cool things about her.
11:42She was badass.
11:44She was a guide and an interpreter that traveled thousands of miles, all while being a working
11:49mom.
11:49Yep.
11:50She had a baby on her back the entire time she was doing this.
11:53And she's now on a coin.
11:54Yeah.
11:55But what if she is more than this?
11:57What if there is a part of her story that I am so passionate about, I am ready and willing
12:02to stake my personal and professional reputation on it?
12:05After extensive research, I've come to the conclusion that Sacagawea was America's first
12:10fag hag.
12:16We're getting into the gay portion of the presentation.
12:19Yes.
12:20Yes.
12:21And for those of you uncomfortable with me using the term hag in reference to my anti-Sacagawea,
12:26please know it comes from Native love.
12:29Okay.
12:29And for those of you uncomfortable with me using the term fag, please know that I can
12:34because I'm a Capricorn.
12:39Why do I believe Sacagawea was a fervent ally of the gay community?
12:43Well, Lewis and Clark were gay.
12:46If they existed in the last 10 years, they would be two Chromatica Oreo cookies.
12:50Yes.
12:52How did I come to this conclusion?
12:53Well, general vibes.
12:58Secondly, they're bad with directions.
13:01Oh.
13:01Yeah.
13:02They couldn't tell north from south, left from right, but they could tell European mink
13:06from North American beaver fur?
13:08I don't think so.
13:11Lastly, they're little bitches.
13:12They would complain a lot, and they were objectively rude.
13:18So much, and this is a fact, that when they did meet Sacagawea the first time, they didn't
13:22call her by her name, but gave her the pet nickname, Janie.
13:25Oh.
13:26Oh.
13:27Okay.
13:28That sound can only mean one thing.
13:30It's time for gay native science.
13:36Also, that sound was not an eagle, but a red-tailed hawk, but Hollywood says it's an eagle.
13:40So here we are.
13:41I want to talk about what I call the gays and gals ecosystem.
13:44This was a deep dive into three areas where the FH dynamic exists.
13:48FH being fag-haggery.
13:51Small boy, tall girl.
13:53Since the dawn of time, these two would find comfort and solace with each other on the playground
13:57and kind of be the coolest kids.
14:00Second, workplace settings.
14:02Because a toxic workplace besets a toxic relationship.
14:05Hence, Sacagawea and Lewis and Clark.
14:07The 90s.
14:08If you were alive, aware, or know someone who existed in the 1990s, there's a chance that
14:14you are closer to an FH dynamic than you even realize.
14:17How did Sacagawea fall into the fruit fly trap?
14:19Well, the same way anyone does.
14:22She was bored.
14:24There was no Advil, no ketamine, no fun.
14:27Secondly, she's a hot mommy.
14:31Was she a teen mom?
14:32Yes, but the times are different.
14:34And lastly, did you say free trip?
14:38These are basically the abracadabra words that create the perfect dynamic all to end with
14:42the perfect fruit bowl.
14:44I want to take a minute to talk about the actual expedition to the West.
14:46The only reason they got from North Dakota to the Pacific was because of her.
14:50She did trade negotiations, often exchanging the items on her for goods.
14:56She went to exchange a belt on her own body in exchange for horses across the Rockies.
15:01And that's an FH move.
15:02Lastly, she used her intrinsic knowledge of the land and her language to just keep everyone
15:07alive.
15:08Again, doing this with a baby on her back.
15:10And as someone who's moved from New York to Los Angeles, I can relate.
15:16Oh, we know what time it is.
15:18Gay Native Science!
15:21Ah, incredible.
15:22I asked myself, if NORAD can track Santa, then I can track this.
15:27And in a method the government uses to track tornadoes and terrorists, I created the Flame
15:30Dame Scale.
15:31The first level is FD1.
15:33A-OK.
15:33This is the most common of the FH dynamic relationship.
15:36They're usually BFS for four to five minutes.
15:38It's a short-lived scenario.
15:40Usually in the bathroom of a bar at like 2.45 a.m.
15:44A lot of things are being spilled.
15:46FD2.
15:47This is where things are starting to get a little dangerous.
15:49OK?
15:50At this point, she knows the best gay bars.
15:52She knows when to go and who to go with.
15:54He has her best shirt, her favorite shirt, that he says he looks cuter in.
15:58And objectively, he does.
16:01Lastly, this is the part that you should be most scared.
16:03They're traveling in packs specifically for Bachelorette weekends in Austin and Nashville.
16:08If you see a group in white cowboy boots with one gay, move.
16:13The final scale, FD3.
16:15Run, don't walk.
16:17This is basically the pairing that's like, if Hiroshima happened on top of a Sabrina Carpenter
16:22concert.
16:22Wait for the storm to pass.
16:27But sadly, for Secretary Lewis Clark, it ended.
16:30Like every M. Night Shyamalan movie in the third act, it kind of just went somewhere else.
16:34But what causes this?
16:35Well, unfortunately, it's men.
16:39In a move that sadly upholds patriarchy, the gay and the gal exit back to men in their respective
16:45corners.
16:45And I have to ask myself as a gay person, how do I feel letting go of this powerful dynamic
16:51to uphold the patriarchy just to ogle some cum gutters?
16:55And well, I could say that because I'm a Pisces moon.
16:59But guys, this is our win for forgotten history.
17:02We need to celebrate this.
17:03We need to honor the forgotten queens, the forgotten fag hags of the past, including Mary
17:08Todd Lincoln.
17:08Oh, yes.
17:10Obviously.
17:11Marie Antoinette.
17:12Oh, my God.
17:14Whose fag haggery arguably led to the gayest thing ever, the French Revolution.
17:18Right.
17:19Whoa.
17:20Slay.
17:21Pinocchio.
17:21R.I.P.
17:24R.I.P.
17:25May he rest.
17:28Lastly, if you feel any guilt for what happened to my people, either native or gay, feel free
17:34to Venmo me.
17:35DM me.
17:36I like all numbers to end with two zeros.
17:39Wow.
17:40This was my research on the hidden story of Sacagawea.
17:43Ty, thank you so much for your enlightening presentation.
17:47Now to kick off the Q&A.
17:48I want to know, do we know anything about Sacagawea's sexuality?
17:52I will say that's her business.
17:53Okay.
17:53Yeah.
17:54And actually, if you could not.
17:56You know what?
17:56I'm going to go.
17:59Do you have any thoughts about how we could further the usage of Sacagawea in our currency?
18:04In the honor of resistance, I think we should turn it into a weapon.
18:07That's great.
18:08Yes.
18:08I think we should get some sort of nerf-style gun that can hit, harm, but not kill.
18:14Yeah.
18:14Enough to leave a Sacagawea print kind of just right on the cheek.
18:17Like that one Ninja Turtles toy that fired pizzas, but for golden dollars.
18:20Yes.
18:20Okay, great.
18:21Also, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are indigenous.
18:24Wow.
18:26People never talk about that.
18:27I don't.
18:28I am a cishet male, but I have often been a small boy with a tall girl friend, and I
18:38just, you know, I'm not sure what the question is, but I'm just sort of wondering, what's
18:44that about?
18:45You're gay.
18:46Yeah.
18:47You're gay.
18:48You're gay.
18:48I am?
18:49I'm a very short girl.
18:51What dynamic do I fall into, if any?
18:54I'm just gay.
18:54I don't know.
18:55Oh, I'm sorry.
19:00You listed several historical figures that fit into the same category as Sacagawea.
19:05Are there any that you would say are the polar opposite that you can think of?
19:08Madeleine Albright.
19:11Yeah.
19:13Maybe Janet Reno.
19:15Perfect.
19:16Yeah.
19:17You mentioned that when you moved here, it was similar to how Sacagawea had a baby on
19:21her back.
19:21What was your baby?
19:22My baby was an eight-pound cat named Beans, who we thought died on the plane.
19:29Right.
19:29It turns out he was just very cold.
19:32Hi.
19:32Thank you so much for this wonderful presentation.
19:43Well, like a pig in pants, I wanted to introduce you to my topic.
19:47The most pivotal moment in film history was Linda Hamilton in Terminator 2.
19:52I know I could just stop here.
19:54We all already know this, but why don't we talk it through?
19:57Why don't you get your thoughts affirmed by me, Cameron Esposito?
20:03Let's start at the top.
20:05Yeah.
20:06Oh.
20:06Yeah, absolutely.
20:08Wow.
20:08Oh, yes.
20:09This next patient is interesting.
20:11Like Linda, I, too, have been to the loony bin.
20:13And my shoulder caps, not that bad.
20:16Ooh.
20:17Yeah, yeah.
20:17Yeah.
20:18Woo.
20:19Okay.
20:20Yeah, I mean, this is honestly what most women walking a red carpet want to look like.
20:24Why don't I run through my three indisputable points?
20:27Number one, Sarah Connor has the greatest character arc in film history.
20:31Now, not since the Virgin Mary has a more important person off-screen birth to savior, but we all
20:39know prior to this film, how was birth depicted?
20:44Ellen Ripley, straight out of the chest.
20:47Rosemary and her baby?
20:49Too scary to look at.
20:51And even my own mother would not positively review birth.
20:55But because of Linda Hamilton and the way she is connected to her son, John, we have
21:04a new view of motherhood, strong motherhood, mother that wants to be a mother.
21:09And because of Linda Hamilton's turn in this film, we got Emily Blunt in A Quiet Place.
21:15Just as a side story, I recently had to be in a TV show where a prosthetic nail was driven
21:20into my arm.
21:21I had to go get fitted for a prosthetic arm.
21:23The person who was directing it saw my arm, yelled out to his assistants, Horatio, bring
21:30me Emily Blunt's arm.
21:34Wow.
21:35And they just cast it off of that.
21:37They just cast it off of that.
21:39And then the next day, I still had to live.
21:41But it was hard.
21:42It was hard to follow that up.
21:44Now, greatest general improvement in here.
21:46Let's check it out.
21:47She's beautiful.
21:48I mean, it's permed and poofy.
21:50It's bushy.
21:50It's of the moment.
21:51But then look at this.
21:52Look at this.
21:53Look at this.
21:54Taught and tempting.
21:56Now, if there's anybody who understands hair evolution, it's me.
22:00I grew up with a bull cut.
22:01That's why I'm a stand-up comic.
22:02Eventually, in middle school, I had sort of what I would call a flight attendant.
22:06It was right down here, kind of a triangle.
22:09And then for some reason, I also wore a scarf around my neck, tied facing forward.
22:13We don't know why that was.
22:16After that, I had my legendary side mullet, you remember, where I had no hair here, but
22:23a lot of hair here.
22:24Briefly, I had a greaser swoop.
22:25Now, I'm sort of doing the Ty LeClaire.
22:27All right, damsel in distress to hunter-killer.
22:36Maybe we think, well, that's the end of Sarah Connor.
22:38She's going to run from murderous robots forever.
22:43But here she is, a damsel in distress.
22:46And don't worry.
22:47By T2, she is the hunter.
22:49She is the killer.
22:50Hunter-killer, obviously, also the name of the flying Terminator.
22:53Again, this is stuff you already know.
22:55Training for film.
22:56Previously, this is what we got.
22:58Women in sci-fi and action films.
23:00Now, Ellen Ripley, we love her.
23:02Why is this the size of her underwear?
23:06She's a space-born trucker.
23:08That's not the right size underwear.
23:11Now, obviously, Princess Leia, and we love Carrie Fisher, to death.
23:16This is her more relaxed look, but we all remember the bikini.
23:19Either way, what she's going for is a sister you kind of want to sleep with.
23:22And that's a different thing.
23:24Jane Fonda, Barbarella, obviously a huge political activist, but also like a robot that's going to sex kill you.
23:31Yeah.
23:32What do we have now after Linda?
23:34Ilona Marr from Dancing with the Stars fame.
23:36Also an Olympic rugby player that will score a try just by running you down.
23:41This is what we have in terms of bodies, bodies to look at these days.
23:45And it's all due to Linda.
23:47Why is that?
23:47Linda trained three hours a day, six days a week, starting two weeks after she gave birth.
23:54That's how she prepped for this film.
23:56Nobody had done that kind of physical prep before this film.
23:59In fact, Linda weighed 112 pounds.
24:02She could bench 85.
24:03Four, Chris Hemsworth, when he was training, yeah, pound for pound, she could outbench him.
24:09And by the way, all Marvel heroes and their bullshit training and their bunches of hard-boiled eggs and their chicken breasts, they all owe it to her.
24:19We weren't doing this before.
24:20Do you remember Christopher Reeve as Superman?
24:24Not a muscle on the fella.
24:26Just a straight up and down.
24:28Just a real Halloween costume without the fake muscles.
24:32And that's who we believed would be a superhero.
24:35This shit, this is Linda.
24:37Now listen.
24:39Whoa!
24:40Okay.
24:41Okay.
24:42Okay.
24:42Even if we're anti-gun, we have to admit that a one-arm shotgun reload is just cool.
24:49Yeah.
24:50Yeah.
24:50It's like when you see smoking in movies and you go, yeah, lung cancer's worth it.
24:56Yeah.
24:57Oh!
24:58You want to hold that?
24:59Yes.
25:00Whoa!
25:01Oh!
25:03There's live ammo in there, baby!
25:07Well, here, quick.
25:08Point it at everybody while you leave it.
25:10Relationship to technology.
25:14What Linda was able to do, there hasn't been a bigger moment in film tech and FX since.
25:20She had to act opposite animatronics.
25:22A robot so slow it feels like Frodo and Sam trying to get to Mount Doom.
25:28The level of acting that she is doing to run from essentially a puppet.
25:33It's like making It's a Small World scary.
25:37And I can't do that, can you?
25:38But not only was she acting opposite old school tech, she also was acting opposite new school tech.
25:47Now, in Terminator 2, there is groundbreaking facial morphing technology that had only before been used in Michael Jackson's black and white video.
25:54Now, these days, we can do this all on our phones.
25:56We've got AI.
25:57We've got filters.
25:58But at the time, nobody had acted opposite something like this.
26:00It's Robert Patrick in motion cap dots.
26:04And she's trying to make it seem like he's made of liquid metal.
26:08Wow.
26:08So we've got old school tech, we've got new school tech, but there's also one-of-a-kind technology in this film.
26:15Because you see, Linda, she's a twin.
26:17Her sister, a school teacher.
26:19And at the end of the film, when the T-1000 doubles Linda, doubles Sarah Connor,
26:24so that John Connor will be confused about who his real mom is and try to save the wrong one,
26:30well, that was just Linda's actual sister.
26:32What?
26:34She played opposite animatronics, groundbreaking effects, and the co-resident of her mother's womb.
26:42Nobody's done this before or since.
26:45I know this was really fun to watch, but would you like to participate?
26:49Yes.
26:50Yes.
26:51Please bring in the chin-up bar.
26:53Oh, my God.
26:54No, Cameron, no.
26:58Nobody's ever done exercise on dropouts.
27:01No.
27:04Cameron.
27:05You just jumped up there.
27:07Who's first?
27:08I mean, I'll just go.
27:09Let's go, baby.
27:10All right.
27:10Rekha.
27:11And you know what I always say?
27:12If you're not wearing a velvet blazer, that's a mistake.
27:15That's right.
27:16You got this, Rekha.
27:17Wow.
27:18There it is.
27:19Wow.
27:19There it is.
27:20Go, go, go, go, Rekha.
27:21Yeah, yeah.
27:21Try again.
27:23Yeah.
27:23It's actually quite easy.
27:30Just like Linda.
27:31Paul, Will, Paul, Will, Paul, Will, Paul, Will.
27:34There it is.
27:36Oh, my God.
27:37How dare you be this strong?
27:47Oh, my God.
27:48I mean, one thing I'm going to say is your tweet is going to smell terrible.
27:51Oh, yeah.
27:52You get that from being an animator?
27:54So not only was Linda Hamilton T1 and T2, but she took a break from Hollywood.
28:00And just as a sidebar, she has bipolar disorder.
28:04So do I.
28:05Yeah.
28:06Represent.
28:07But not too long ago, she came back in her mid-60s to reprise her role of Sarah Connor
28:13in Terminator Dark Fate.
28:15She had normal aging on her face, gray hair.
28:19I mean, I don't know what's going to happen to me in the future.
28:23But what I know is that I hope once I leave today, leave anywhere.
28:30Leave this plane.
28:31Well, I hope.
28:33I'll be back.
28:40Oh!
28:41Woo!
28:42Bravo.
28:43Wow.
28:46Cameron, thank you for that enlightening presentation.
28:51Now, let's kick off the Q&A.
28:52Yeah.
28:53You mentioned that Sarah Connor and this, like, fake Sarah Connor are, like, pitted against
28:58each other.
28:59Right.
28:59If I'm Linda Hamilton's twin sister, who you said is a teacher.
29:03School teacher.
29:04Hasn't been working out for a million hours a day.
29:06That's a great point.
29:07Did she look as ripped?
29:09I'm quaking in my boots to go on that set with my jacked-as-hell twin sister.
29:14And it's supposed to be like we're being confused for each other.
29:16Yeah, that's a really great point.
29:18So it's a pretty quick sequence.
29:19Okay.
29:20And she does look good.
29:21I've always wondered about her return to the classroom because Sarah Connor's a terrifying
29:26character.
29:27And if that was your teacher, I just feel like you'd do your homework.
29:29Yeah.
29:30Totally.
29:30Can you talk about the Linda Hamilton to Michelle Obama arms pipeline?
29:36That's such a great question.
29:37Great question.
29:37And the answer is Angela Bassett.
29:40I see.
29:41Yes.
29:41Yes.
29:42What celebrity's arm do I have?
29:44Like, you were lucky enough to have...
29:45Can you...
29:45Yeah.
29:46I'll give it to everyone.
29:47Take it off.
29:48Take it off.
29:48Take it off.
29:48Take it off.
29:49You can have a blaze around.
29:50Wow.
29:51Wow.
29:51Whoa.
29:52Cool.
29:53And show...
29:53And pop me a...
29:54Yeah.
29:54Oh, I'm sorry.
29:55It might not pop.
29:56But that's just a today thing.
29:57And now just sort of relaxed.
29:59Just...
30:00And just hanging.
30:01Alexis Bledel.
30:02You know what I'm saying?
30:03Oh.
30:04A long and storied grip she's...
30:07A Gilmore arm.
30:08She's beautiful.
30:09She's got a lot to say.
30:10Yeah.
30:10And she's going to do a huge career pivot, you know?
30:13That's right.
30:13I have a Yale arm.
30:14I have a stealing a boat arm.
30:16Mm-hmm.
30:16Okay.
30:17I love that.
30:18That's a perfect answer.
30:18Yeah, you're welcome.
30:19Do you think she would do another Terminator?
30:21She was pretty worked up about not wanting to do this Terminator.
30:25And I don't know the answer, but what I will say is that Mackenzie Davis was a Terminator
30:29in a film that Linda wasn't in.
30:32And that was just really excellent.
30:35Also, Lena Headey played Sarah Connor in a Terminator TV show.
30:39Oh.
30:40And so, I mean, listen, I don't work in Hollywood.
30:42But if I had to pick, I would say Mackenzie Davis, Terminator, and Lena Headey, Sarah Connor,
30:49but they have a sexual relationship.
30:52And it's at my house.
30:53Okay.
30:53Okay.
30:54I'm kind of getting the sense that Terminators are like jokers for women.
30:58That every woman, it's like prestigious to be one.
31:01Yeah.
31:01Mm-hmm.
31:02Is that okay?
31:03I can't believe I have not been cast.
31:06That's kind of what this whole thing is about.
31:07I think this is a great audition.
31:09I think this is fantastic.
31:11This is my reel, and you are all here for it.
31:14Thanks for reading with me.
31:15Yeah.
31:16We see a slate for your audition for Sarah Connor.
31:19And can you slate from that?
31:20Yeah, yeah, of course.
31:20Oh, yeah, perfect.
31:21Bar.
31:22Slay some bar, please.
31:23Hi, I'm Cameron Esposito.
31:25I'm 5'4".
31:25I live in Los Angeles.
31:26And I am reading for Sarah Connor.
31:29Yeah!
31:32Oh, my God.
31:34Cameron, that was incredible.
31:36Thank you so, so much.
31:40Woo!
31:47Well, we learned a lot tonight, everyone.
31:50And with that, our secret meeting must come to an end.
31:53Let us retreat back into the shadows just a little more enlightened than we were before.
31:58Thank you, and good night.