EastEnders 5th June 2025
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📺
TVTranscript
00:00MUSIC
00:11Hey, hey, what?
00:12Painting over the cracks?
00:15That was a joke.
00:16Oh, Kat, come on.
00:18You've got to let Jean get used to the idea
00:20that you've now hopped into bed with Harvey, so to speak.
00:24She slapped me round the face and said I ain't a Slater anymore.
00:28No, I'll get it. That was yesterday, but today you should...
00:29It'll be different, you know.
00:31I only just said Amy's babysitting.
00:33And?
00:35Well, I don't need babysitting.
00:37And not by someone I hang around with.
00:38Are you trying to embarrass me or what?
00:40You said earlier, and I'm quoting here,
00:42I ain't babysitting while you two pretend Stag and Hen do it up.
00:46And if I get a phone call from Amy interrupting my Hen do,
00:49there will be trouble.
00:50You do know it's fair, you don't know.
00:52I'm not even getting married for real.
00:53OK, Mush. A couple of things here, all right?
00:55Number one, we're not getting married. Not yet,
00:58but we will be doing for real.
01:01And when we do get married,
01:04you're going to be best men.
01:06For real? You're mad for real, isn't it?
01:08All right, yeah, for real.
01:11Hey, Kat, look.
01:12Tommy Moon's cracked the smile.
01:14You lot are nice.
01:15Yeah, you're a nice.
01:16Hey, stop using my aftershave, because it stinks on you.
01:19I think I will go and see Jean.
01:20Very well, yeah.
01:21Now, maybe you're right.
01:22But, you know, now she's had time to sleep on it,
01:25she might see my point of view.
01:28Don't ever mention Kat's name in this house again.
01:31Oh, no, come on.
01:31I don't mean that.
01:32She's dead to me.
01:33Oi, you're the one that always says
01:34that we never turn our back on our family.
01:37But because they stab you in the back.
01:38No, it's the hag.
01:39You've got to be there.
01:40Hag.
01:41Hen and Stag.
01:42It's a mash-up, innit?
01:44Like Hen and Dick,
01:45I'm not interested in anything
01:46that woman ever does again.
01:49Kat and Harvey are are in limos.
01:51Not eloping.
01:53So, get a frock on
01:55and let's get hammered at their expense.
01:58You're going?
01:59Of course I am.
02:02Then,
02:03what are we going to do?
02:06Ignore her
02:07and let's get our groove on, yeah?
02:09Come on.
02:10Mm.
02:16This is our karaoke night.
02:31We should be heaving.
02:33Okay.
02:34What Marie does in her own time
02:36is her business.
02:37But I'm concerned about
02:39the lack of our business.
02:42Yeah, well, Kat and Alfie
02:43have got their bag thing
02:44going on over at Harry's Byron.
02:45It's bound to affect us.
02:46Oh, that's a bit pitchy.
02:48Oh, listen,
02:49I'm going to have to get Felix.
02:50Felix!
02:51Oh, very, oh,
02:51we're going to lose
02:52all our customers.
02:56Thank you, Sripley!
02:57Ooh, I think I might
02:59wander over to the Albert later,
03:00see if Cindy's even bothered
03:01to open up.
03:02But who does she think she is
03:03thinking we'd work for free?
03:05She is delusional.
03:06Darling, she doesn't care
03:07about anyone.
03:08Yeah, well, let's see how
03:09she manages with no staff.
03:11And no customers.
03:15Oh, no.
03:16Kill me now.
03:17Thanks and pray it's all
03:19It's all
03:20Welcome to the new era
03:25of inclusivity!
03:27The new Prince of Ireland!
03:32This, this is my song!
03:35Everywhere I'm going to,
03:37everywhere I'm going to,
03:41there's our sin.
03:43You're so important to me
03:45It's all
03:48Look, I know what you think of me,
03:54but I'm just,
03:55I'm just doing what's best
03:57for my family.
03:58And you're too important to me
04:00to just carry on.
04:01If I was that important,
04:02you would never have gone
04:03into business with Harvey.
04:04I was tricked into it.
04:05Well, then walk away.
04:07Well, the wedding's tied up in it.
04:09Kathy and Harvey are paying for half of it.
04:12Well, three quarters once I've fiddled the invoices.
04:14But that's it, they're nothing more to me than that.
04:17I wouldn't spit on them if they were on fire.
04:18So please, Jean, please, can we just move on?
04:22Move on, move on.
04:24That's all Freddie and Mo keep saying to me.
04:26Do you not think that I've tried?
04:29I can't.
04:30And believe me, I want to, but I'm stuck.
04:33Something's stopping me and I hate it.
04:35Look, you saw how I was in pieces when Phil cheated on me, eh?
04:42But look at me now.
04:44You know, I'm moving on with Alfie.
04:45I haven't got an Alfie.
04:47I haven't got a man to fall back on who thinks I'm wonderful
04:50no matter how badly I treat them.
04:53Hang on a minute.
04:54No, I won't.
04:56You betrayed me.
04:58You don't love me.
05:01Love?
05:02You reported my tummy to the social.
05:07I had my boy taken off me and you stand there
05:09preaching family loyalty to me.
05:13You only went next door to live with Zach.
05:15Didn't know that when you reported me, did you?
05:18What you did was far worse than me and Alfie
05:22renting a limo with Harvey and Kathy.
05:25You tore my family to pieces, yeah?
05:28But I forgave you in time.
05:31I moved on from the hurt and the pain you caused me.
05:35So no, Jean.
05:36No.
05:37I'm sick of feeling guilty about a business deal.
05:43You neglected Harvey
05:44and pushed him into the arms of another woman.
05:47All right, Kathy?
06:00Oh, yeah.
06:02Can I just grab an ice bun, please?
06:04Louie's been demanding one.
06:06About to leave the boys with Penny.
06:08Oh, yeah.
06:09All right.
06:11So did you know
06:12Peter's looking to get full custody?
06:15Er, he did mention it, yeah.
06:18Oh.
06:19Thanks for the heads up.
06:21Oh, look, Lauren, it won't come to anything.
06:24If you could just sort things out
06:25and move forward together.
06:27I know there's still love there.
06:30No, he's just waiting for me to fall off the wagon
06:32and then he's going to swoop in.
06:33He's going to take my boys away from me.
06:36Well, they are his sons, too.
06:39Yeah.
06:40Yeah, I know.
06:40And if he's happy with seeing him just, you know,
06:43every other weekend and half the summer holidays,
06:45then fine, he's going to have to take me to court then, isn't he?
06:47But until then, he's not getting a-looking.
06:51Look, I...
06:52I hope that I can trust you, Kathy.
06:55Because you, you can see the boys whenever you want.
06:58Honestly, you can.
06:58But just...
06:59Not Ian.
07:00Not Cindy.
07:02Well, you know I am always going to take Pete aside.
07:05You know that.
07:07But, yes.
07:09No, you can trust me.
07:10But don't go turning your back on everyone, Lauren.
07:13You are going to need help.
07:15Yeah, well, I have.
07:16I've got my own family.
07:24Look, come on, Tonys.
07:25You can do this.
07:26You'll be great.
07:26Come on.
07:27You come and sit.
07:28Come on.
07:29You've got this.
07:29Five, six, seven, eight.
07:38It started with a kiss.
07:42Never thought it would come to this.
07:47It started with a kiss.
07:51Never thought it would come to this.
07:54How long do you have to stay?
07:59Yeah, I know.
08:00Karaoke normally brings in a bit of crowds, so.
08:03Would you rather be back at mine, you know, just the two of us?
08:06Yes.
08:07But there's hardly anyone else here.
08:09And I don't want to watch that ground, all right?
08:13Well, babe, you need to decide which drag queen you want to play is the most.
08:16Yes, G.
08:20Any thoughts?
08:22I think I'll have a brandy.
08:25And before you ask if I'm sure and what am I doing drinking on my own, don't.
08:29Just pour the brandy.
08:31I knew it.
08:32Betrayed by my own family.
08:34Join the club.
08:36Put the mics down.
08:38Hello?
08:38Put the mics down.
08:40Look, I've got your costume at home, yeah?
08:42Where's this a support for the hen and stag organiser?
08:45Look, look, look, look, just forget this thing and come on, man.
08:50Oi, you can't just come in here and drag away all our hunters.
08:53I'm not being funny, Shalane, but you might want to do yourself a favour and come with us, yeah?
08:58It's dead in here.
08:59Unlike the Albert, now that's where the party is.
09:02What the hell are you talking about?
09:04The Albert, you know, Cindy's launch.
09:06Now, I will admit I did nip in for a free shot.
09:10And, mate, I had to push myself through a crowd of hot, sweaty men.
09:13Well, she's got no staff.
09:15Oh, she's got a load of staff.
09:16Even Jean is serving behind the bar.
09:18We didn't see him down.
09:19Come on, let's go.
09:20Come on, quick, quick.
09:25Jean, come on.
09:27Why would I want to go and celebrate anything to do with Cat and Alfie?
09:30Well, it's their big night, innit?
09:32And they want everything to be perfect.
09:34And you being there would make their night.
09:37Come on, you two.
09:37Let's go.
09:38Perfect.
09:43I suppose I could make an appearance.
09:47Oh!
09:48Oh, it's...
09:49I guess it was every time.
09:50I know, I know.
09:51It's like...
09:51Oi!
09:52You still want that limp, bro?
09:53She got you proper good, bro.
09:55She shoots.
09:56She scores.
09:57Cold drama.
09:58And it's manned out.
09:59Just a scare anyway.
10:01Watch your mouth, bro.
10:02You'll be a loser.
10:03Yeah.
10:04Total movies, right?
10:08Jean can go and stew, as far as I'm concerned.
10:11Oh, she'll get over it, ain't you?
10:12Are you excited?
10:14What about our fake wedding?
10:16Okay, get it.
10:16I know we're doing it back to front, right?
10:18But we're going to have some top-notch promo pics, a wedding package.
10:22We'll have a few drinks.
10:23Knees up.
10:24Before your night, you'll have a ring on your finger.
10:25And we'll be well truly spliced.
10:27I'm used to rob them, Nick.
10:29Come here.
10:30Well, you know, Kat, I love you within my heart.
10:41I know you do.
10:43Yeah.
10:44It's a deaf-est apart for sure, yeah?
10:46Mm-hmm.
10:47Okay.
10:50I love you, Kat.
10:51I love you, darling.
10:53Come.
10:55Cindy's party looks like a riot.
10:56Why don't we dump her and just join the game?
10:59Now, Kim's skin us for life, she will.
11:01Oh, I'm going to tell you.
11:03Now, it's about time.
11:04Yeah, okay, apologies.
11:05Okay, we just thought you were going to get the first round in, that's all.
11:07Oh, do me a favour, Steve.
11:09What is that limo doing here?
11:11Well, get a swish to arrive in Starmer.
11:13Welcome to your hang.
11:16What?
11:17Well, it's the theme of your hang, babe.
11:20Yeah.
11:20I'm not even down with me.
11:23What?
11:23What?
11:24Alfie!
11:25All right, Alfie, get your kit off and put this leopard print on.
11:34Yeah, Alfie!
11:35Put it on.
11:36All right, Alfie.
11:37All right, Alfie.
11:39All right.
11:41It's right.
11:42Oh, boy.
11:43Oh, boy.
11:43Oh, boy.
11:43Oh, boy.
11:43Oh, boy.
11:44Oh, boy.
11:44Oh, boy.
11:45Oh, boy.
11:46Oh, boy.
11:47Oh, boy.
11:48Oh, boy.
11:49Oh, boy.
11:50Oh, Mum.
11:52Oh, do you need more mixers?
11:54No, no.
11:55I just meant to say it's really good.
11:58I'm really pleased to go so well.
12:00Oh.
12:01I mean what I said, you know, about turning everything around.
12:04You, Anna.
12:05Peter, you're my focus now.
12:07My only focus.
12:08And I swear I am never leaving you again.
12:11I swear.
12:12I want you here with me running this place, yeah?
12:15Yeah, yeah.
12:16We'll see.
12:17I'm just going to play our paper song.
12:20Ha, ha, ha.
12:21I'm just going to play our paper song.
12:24Ha, ha, ha.
12:26All right.
12:27I'm going to go get your jaw.
12:28It's a good idea.
12:29Absolutely.
12:30You're not going to enjoy yourself.
12:33Oh, Ben said I need to get out of walks, though.
12:36What?
12:37Like a...
12:38Are you passed?
12:39No, no.
12:40Nothing like that.
12:41Just getting out of the flat, you know?
12:42Yeah.
12:43The dancer keeps smiling at me.
12:44Mm-hmm.
12:45I'll put a fiver in his pants.
12:47See where that gets you.
12:51Sorry.
12:52Congratulations.
12:53I bought you a bottle of the good stuff, don't you celebrate?
12:56Oh.
12:57Thanks, Elaine.
12:58I'm, er...
12:59I'm surprised.
13:00I'm flattered.
13:01Gina, a cup of drinks over here, please.
13:03I said to George, it's important to be supportive.
13:06Oh, well, I couldn't have done it without him.
13:08I mean, the agency staff were brilliant.
13:10I mean, the dancers, just a genius idea.
13:12Yeah, her staff walked out, so I helped out a bit.
13:15A bit?
13:16You and Gina were here helping me for hours.
13:19Oh, sorry.
13:20Did you not know?
13:22Course I did.
13:23It was my idea.
13:29Lannan.
13:30She was on her own.
13:31She just needed some help.
13:33This is the competition.
13:35She needs to fail.
13:37You say competition.
13:38Do you mean the Bic or you?
13:39Because all I did was move some boxes and do a bit of painting.
13:41Then why didn't you tell me?
13:43Then let me walk in here and get humiliated with egg all over me face.
13:47She's not your wife anymore, George.
13:49I am.
13:50And you need to talk to me like the partner you're supposed to be.
13:54And not keep things behind your back like some schoolboy.
13:57I knew you'd react this way.
13:58Then why did you help her?
14:00Can't you see she's trying to get in between us again?
14:03She's had the son, now she wants the father.
14:06Well, I'm not having it.
14:07I'm done.
14:08I'm done.
14:21All right?
14:22He's out.
14:23All right, baby.
14:25All right, all right.
14:27I wonder you've got a better back.
14:29I'm going to shake the snake.
14:35Shake the snake?
14:36Who says that?
14:37Elvis.
14:38Leave now, now, now, and see the attraction.
14:39I wonder you walk like that.
14:43I'll be excited.
14:44I'll be excited.
14:47You're supposed to be dressed like Kat.
14:48I don't want to dress as a woman.
14:50Oh, yeah?
14:51Since when?
14:53I was a lot younger, and if I remember correctly, you were the one who dared me.
14:56Yeah, well, your chest was still bigger than mine in that corset.
15:02I'll be back in a minute.
15:13Haven't seen you around in a while.
15:15Wouldn't have thought you wanted to.
15:18And I see that you've made absolutely no effort to get into the park, you're spirit.
15:23Well, it's hard to improve on perfection.
15:29It's good to see you, Denise.
15:32Yeah, it's good to see you, too.
15:38You made the right choice.
15:41Yeah, I know I did.
15:42Just saying it, Laurie.
15:43Oh, yeah.
15:44That's what people notice about you, babe.
15:45Your impeccable manners.
15:46I'll tell you now, Harry, Kat has a beard like that most mornings.
15:48Oi!
15:49I heard that.
15:50And also, I've got to tell you right now, I do have a nice set of pins.
15:52Have you ever shaved them?
15:53I don't want to do that, of course.
15:54Well, that's a better definition of me.
15:55Yeah, you think they look good now?
15:56You should see them after a bit of hair removal.
15:57Oh, yeah, exactly.
15:58Ladies, five shots.
15:59Oh, yeah.
16:00I've got to see you, ladies.
16:01One, two, three.
16:02Good, good.
16:03Oh, my God.
16:04Oh, my God.
16:05Oh, my God.
16:06Oh, my God.
16:07Oh, my God.
16:08Oh, my God.
16:09I've got to see you right now, I do have a nice set of pins.
16:12Have you ever shaved them?
16:13I don't want to do that, of course.
16:14One, two, three!
16:17Oh, goodness!
16:24Kira got me to shake my mind, Sia.
16:26It was a holiday drag contest.
16:28What? It was a what?
16:30It was a last holiday.
16:32OK, did you win?
16:33Come on, Miles.
16:34Oh, no!
16:35I can see it!
16:36No, no, no! I'm filming it!
16:38I've been filming it!
16:39Oh!
16:40What are you doing?
16:41Checking out the pins!
16:43In all!
16:44In all!
16:45In all!
16:46Come on!
16:47Nobody needs competition, to be honest.
16:58Jean?
16:59Oh!
17:00She was trying to set the fire alarm off.
17:02Why?
17:03No! Stop looking at me!
17:04I just want to go home!
17:05Why would you stoop so low and try to ruin our party?
17:08What are you thinking?
17:09Nothing!
17:10I wasn't thinking anything but to hurt you!
17:12And you!
17:14Dancing!
17:15Celebrating!
17:16You might as well be dancing on my grave!
17:18Oh, come on!
17:19No, you don't get to speak to me!
17:22Because you've ruined everything!
17:27Everything!
17:29Jean, come here.
17:30I don't think so.
17:35Your mum's paying me until they get back.
17:37Well, the twins are asleep.
17:38And there's no way you're babysitting me.
17:41Why are you hanging out with him?
17:44Because he's my mate.
17:46He's a creep!
17:49The girls around here are dead, bro.
17:52Want to pay my console?
17:53Maybe.
17:54Or, er...
17:56Maybe we could do something else?
17:59Does your...
18:01Does your dad ever let you use his credit card?
18:03Yeah.
18:04Once or twice.
18:05Only for games, though.
18:06Right.
18:07So, you know his card details then?
18:10His card's in the drawer.
18:12Right.
18:13Get it.
18:14I don't think so.
18:15Trust me, mate.
18:16It's going to be worth it.
18:17Woo!
18:18Woo!
18:19That's it!
18:20Yeah!
18:22Woo!
18:24Yeah!
18:25Woo!
18:27Yeah!
18:28Trust me, mate, it's going to be worth it.
18:41There you go!
18:43How come you're not dressed as me, then?
18:45Oh, it's too late to make an effort.
18:47But we need this manicured, well-class act.
18:49I am channelling my Margaret Street white boy
18:51well-classed sell-by date.
18:52OK.
18:53Keep the change, shall I?
18:54That's fine! Let's keep it! Keep the change!
18:56Leave my worst nightmare right there, little them cats!
18:59There you go, sweetheart. Come on, get it down your neck.
19:01Oh, no, I'm not in the mood.
19:03OK, enough, I get it. Why don't you just go to see Jean?
19:06What's the point? She hates me!
19:08Most people around here hate you, but you still talk to them, don't you?
19:10I just don't want to see her hurt.
19:12I know, I get it. Me neither.
19:15Right, I'll down this, I'll go round there and I'll make her talk to me, yeah?
19:18Good girl. If anyone can do it, you can. I'm proud of you.
19:20All right. Go on, go and join them.
19:22Yeah, I will do. Just me gusset's riding at the moment.
19:24Right, mate, space, I'm coming in!
19:26Oh!
19:36Do you know, I really hoped you would forget about this custody thing.
19:40I'm stepping up for my boys like you told me to.
19:42Do you think I'm going to wait around for Lauren to start drinking and popping pills again?
19:48Oh, stop it, Peter. You're just being spiteful now.
19:51No, I'm not. Lauren was an amazing mum to Louis. She was, but...
19:56Jimmy's blind, Gran.
19:58We have no idea how hard it's going to be on her if she just pushes me away.
20:02I've arranged to meet a family lawyer.
20:06Oh.
20:07Ben, don't. I need your support with this, 100%, yeah?
20:11All right.
20:13Mum's expecting me.
20:15Oh, you're not going over there?
20:17Like you said. I've got to support your family.
20:20Okay. I should have told you.
20:31Yes. You should.
20:35Cindy's trying her best to do what's right by Peter and the girls.
20:40Of course I stepped in when I saw she was struggling on her own. Anyone would have.
20:44I'm not bothered about anyone.
20:47I'm bothered about you.
20:50Going behind my back. Again.
20:57Oh, where are you going?
21:01I'm going back to the Albu.
21:03To apologise for my wife's behaviour.
21:06Okay?
21:07If I knew it was you, I wouldn't have let you in.
21:15We need to sort this out, Jean.
21:17All right?
21:21I'm sorry.
21:23I haven't thought about your feelings, and I should have done,
21:25and I'm sorry what I said about Stacey, you going off and leaving her.
21:30She said I could go.
21:33She said that she was getting better.
21:35I know.
21:37I'm sorry.
21:42And I'm sorry I tried to ruin your party.
21:46And I'm glad that you're marrying Alfie.
21:49I don't think I'll be able to attend, though.
21:52Ain't you meant to wait to hear when it is before saying that?
21:58I don't know why I'm being like this.
22:00I feel so old, alone, a victim to be scammed, cheated, lied to.
22:15I know.
22:17And I and no-one else should tell you to just get over it.
22:25I'm not getting fake married without you.
22:27God, that'd be silly.
22:28I'm not.
22:30I'll tell Alfie to wait till you're ready.
22:33I'm not trying to guilt trip you.
22:35I mean it, so I'll wait.
22:39Jean, you mean so much to me.
22:41More than you'll ever know.
22:44It's more than family with us.
22:58More than family.
23:00That's great, Mum. I'm really happy for you.
23:04For us.
23:06I'm doing this for you and the girls.
23:08I want to prove to you that I can be responsible and successful in business.
23:13You don't need to prove anything to me.
23:15Abby's thought things out with Lauren yet.
23:20For what it's worth, I've learnt the hard way not to give up on love.
23:24I...
23:27I'll be downstairs, yeah?
23:29I know.
23:31Right.
23:33Sorry, I didn't know you hadn't told Elaine.
23:36Don't give me that.
23:38If that dancer decides to sue me...
23:41Forget about the dancer.
23:43You should've kept your mouth shut and I've already spoken to Elaine about her behaviour.
23:47I'm really worried about Peter.
23:49I think he's blowing it with Lauren.
23:50I mean, what if she decides to take the boys and move away?
23:54Then I've never seen my grandkids again.
23:58I...
23:59I'm sorry.
24:00I'm just...
24:01I've been really stressed about tonight.
24:03I appreciate that.
24:04And I do understand, you know.
24:07I never deserved you, George.
24:09And neither does Elaine.
24:11I hope you know that.
24:13Stop before you say anything else.
24:16Because you don't know in my marriage...
24:18Maybe I don't deserve it, Elaine.
24:25Tommy's fast asleep.
24:27Three of them look like little angels when they're kipping.
24:29I've got a visitor.
24:31Jean.
24:33You alright?
24:34I couldn't leave things as they were.
24:38Good, I'm glad.
24:39And I want you to get married.
24:41Of course I do.
24:42And of course I'll be there.
24:45Don't give up on me, please.
24:47No.
24:48Come here.
24:49Oh, Jean.
24:51Listen.
24:52I ain't got to say this if you don't mean it right.
24:54It is okay.
24:56No, I do mean it.
24:57I do.
24:58When you went out the door, I said to myself, Jean, what are you doing?
25:02Pushing someone away who...
25:04Loves you.
25:06Listen, just because we've gone into business with Harvey and Kathy, it doesn't mean they're our friends.
25:10Yeah, I know.
25:11Let us and Kat's right.
25:12We don't really even tolerate them.
25:13No.
25:14So, let's not spoil it by talking about them.
25:17So, erm...
25:18Er, well, I've said what I've come to say.
25:20So, erm...
25:21Yeah, it's time for my cocoa now.
25:23Okay, can I walk you on?
25:24No, no, no, it's okay.
25:25No, no, I insist.
25:26I insist.
25:27Come on.
25:28See you later.
25:29Yeah.
25:31Right, erm, I'm gonna get on the website and book those doves, yeah?
25:35Yes.
25:36Make sure it's the real deal, okay?
25:37Cos pigeons do not have the same impact.
25:39Ha, ha, ha.
25:40Brr!
25:41Brr!
25:45Right.
25:52Alf?
25:58Ah!