- 6/3/2025
#ShowFilm98
#Ugliest
#House in America
#Ugliest
#House in America
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00Let me guess you came here to get a gander at the beautiful houses didn't you I feel like I
00:07have to remind you once again this is ugliest house in America people lower your expectations
00:16we've seen some unattractive homes over the last few years it is and that's putting it nicely I
00:25don't know how it's possible but America you stepped up your game big time the ugly is back
00:35and it is back with a vengeance it looks like Jabba the Hutt in the corner what is going on you're
00:46gonna find out so get ready for 15 of the weirdest oh my god I just realized there's
00:54the same most dysfunctional how do you sleep down here and downright disastrous places that people
01:01are calling home where do we go from here the worst one of them all we'll get a 150 thousand
01:08dollar renovation designed by Allison Victoria perfection so kids I guess the lesson here is
01:15that sometimes it's good to be bad creepy critters live in the rug for sure I'm coming for you ugly
01:23houses the question is are you ready for me with vast acreage of beautiful farmland and miles of
01:33freshwater coastlines who would have thought the Midwest was so chock-full of ugly first up I'm
01:40visiting the city of Painesville Ohio I'm here to meet Alex and Brandon let's see if they have the
01:48ugliest house in America is it rock in my field yeah I see faces hello come on out cuz you know we got to
02:14talk about the outside okay Alex yes Brandon yes ma'am what's your name Robin Robin Robin and
02:24what's your Jamie Jamie yeah okay tell me about this home well it was made out of concrete by an artist
02:31named Wayne Trapp he had a bunch of art students camp out here and work on the home okay I gotta say
02:37this I'm Brandon this is Alex we live in Painesville Ohio with our kids in a cave house the house was
02:44commissioned by a family with eight kids it's like an indoor playground but it is a challenge to live in
02:52it's more work than I was expecting there's one flat wall in this house one okay I'm nervous but we're
03:00gonna see it what I feel like I don't even need to like point things out it's all right at you what
03:19is going on first of all I'm fearful of like rocks it is deteriorating this right here I feel hemorrhoids
03:27acting up just looking at it what is that there was a portal in the roof they put debris in there
03:34and concreted over it it looks like there's stuff living in there probably actually where do we go
03:43from here so you can see we don't have much of a backyard but we get lots of critters here toad
03:50families in the hall we have toads that live in the house better you than me how long you been here
03:58just a few months you've just yes why I saw the house online and I fell in love with it now I'm
04:06Captain Caveman let's check out the kitchen more skylight yes the concrete has eroded away and this
04:18leaks so we have to be careful when it's raining it's annoying like to introduce you to our part-time
04:24range our stovetop sometimes works you guys I'm stressed okay what are you gonna show me next we can
04:34show you the main bedroom what is going on in here I guess you'd call that a headboard first
04:40of all I would feel like someone was trying to kill me every night it's like gonna come down there's
04:47a guillotine over your head come on it does not say come rest we have our ensuite sort of bathrooms well
04:57sort of the toilet toilet room separate room yes I'm so annoyed so annoyed and then to wash
05:03your hands you have to come over here only one of our sinks works in fact only one bathroom sink
05:09in the whole house works oh and there's only one shower in the whole house that works why did you
05:14it's she's crazy it's a house for kids what is happening right here oh our chickens are inside
05:20chickens in the house oh chicken you know it's impossible to catch a chicken
05:32so then the shower is back here yes oh boy this is too narrow what is this my brain cannot accept
05:46that this is the shower and this is the only one in the house that works yes we'll go to the children's
05:54way so this is one of the kids bedrooms it's there's a tunnel between bedrooms would you like to go
06:09that way I'm 100% sure I would not be able to make yeah that's gotta be fun for the kids right I get it
06:17and did you notice where the lights are coming from they're shaped like noses
06:21I'm dying okay let's go check out another room okay do you want to show Retta what this is over here
06:33look at that it doesn't look very deep we need more balls okay right now that is a concussion pit
06:43do you want to show Retta the hoop that we use there you go
06:49I'm gonna tell you what I like about this house I like the kids thank you guys for showing me your home
07:06thank you you are a sunny finalist in the Midwest region if you are chosen to move to the next round
07:14you'll be that much closer to a hundred fifty thousand dollar renovation by Allison Victoria it's
07:20a big change I'm gonna wish you good luck and I'm going to leave here in the hopes of not seeing your
07:28toes this is bedrock bedlam do I have to say anything about the appearance it's a concrete cave full of cracks
07:42holes and deadly features hanging from the ceiling where would you find function in this thing nothing
07:49worked the only way this house functions is as a playground for kids the surprise there's chicken
07:56luckily I didn't see frogs the Midwest has got me shook next in the Midwest I'm gonna see if a small town
08:06has some big ugly I'm making my way to central Ohio to a village called Glenford I'm here to meet
08:13Lissy and Cory do they have the ugliest house in America let's find out is it a house it looks like
08:24a bank let's see in Cory living in the Bank of Glenford yes okay let's go inside well today that's my bank lobby
08:48like no changes I'm Lissy and this is my husband Cory we live in Glenford Ohio and we live in a bank we
09:04were searching for homes and this was a weird cool house so we just decided to buy it we're very short
09:10term thinkers it was impossible a couple months after moving in we realized it wasn't quite functional the
09:15rooms are a little weird we don't really have closet space we have a bank teller desk it was cool at
09:21first but now it's annoying so your foyer is in the round great wood and it's got some stained glass
09:31architecturally it's pretty cool not functional but cool we have all of the bank thing is this
09:40where you fill out your deposit slips yep wait am I seeing through it yeah oh snap yeah oh my god
09:50that's hilarious I want to see this that was the first public phone in Glenford Stonehenge 314 but it
09:58doesn't work it doesn't work not even a plant just the lobby is this like a teller space
10:08I'm here to cash my check 1 million dollars I'll have it in 10 minutes please oh I can check the safe for
10:16you see if we have it oh my god I just realized the safe is wrong there's a safe okay we definitely have to look at that we can go around this way okay
10:24oh this is where the cash was were there ever any bank robberies here so not that we know of but our
10:33vents still have burglar bars in them but that vent is so tiny what are they setting it down there
10:38little monkeys two pantsies to come rub the place
10:43what's behind this door that's our bedroom it's our only bedroom
10:48this is a weird space now I'm not really as into the space in your bedrooms right here but I need to
10:55see inside the safe oh geez Louise oh it's like a Russian doll
11:05so this space was the safe mm-hmm I thought it was probably just gonna be like a storage space
11:16no full bathroom I mean this is the thing you gotta get rid of that because if I'm here hanging out
11:24having drinks and then I have to go to the bathroom like it oh geez I gotta go through all through those
11:27doors where to next we're gonna go to the kitchen oh my gosh I can see from here the kitchen is smaller
11:39than the foyer well that's not fair no that's so weird that this sink is in the corner it's awful
11:45it is the most inconvenient thing ever water goes everywhere that's a pain in the neck you want to go
11:50downstairs yeah let's go downstairs it's a stairway to a toilet oh yeah that's our throne toilet
12:03okay let's go in the game room so the second bedroom is downstairs that was this
12:12they call this giant space the bedroom mm-hmm the guest room yes I want to be the guest what's that
12:21short door where are all those all those doors I just realized they're all short half of them are
12:26just little rooms oh weird I'm sorry this is dumb uh-huh you buy a place like this you can bank on it
12:35suck it they need to cash out what are banking words other than deposit in the bathroom thank you
12:50for showing me your home I'm going to wish you good luck thanks for coming thanks for coming out if I
12:55do visit this is where I'll stay that was the bank of bamboozlement
13:03appearance wise it looks like a bank you've got a lobby complete with areas for bank tellers and a
13:11spot to write checks functionality the kitchen is terrible those doors to get into the bathroom
13:16nightmare it has a lot of useless space the surprise how dare you call that entire basement a guest bedroom
13:25ridiculous I gotta say when it comes to being ugly this place is money
13:30for our next stop in the Midwest we traveled to a town just outside of Akron Ohio known as Copley Township
13:40I'm here to meet Shannon she thinks she has the ugliest house in America it's interesting
13:47huh hi it's so nice to meet you can we um talk about the house yeah let's step out here yeah so I'm
14:03curious when you walk up I'm Shannon I live in Copley Ohio in a house that looks like a 1980s pizza joint I
14:21wanted something non-traditional and every time I would drive past this one I would say that's the
14:27one the previous owner built this property based on one of the Frank Lloyd Wright homes just the style
14:33the architecture of it it was like nothing I'd ever seen before but living in it is hard I have a love
14:40hate relationship with my house I want to love it but right now I hate it oh Jesus yeah there's not a
14:51very wide opening there whoa it's mid-century marvelous lots of wood it's lots of brick wow they kept the
15:08bricklayers paid using the little crevices to store little tchotchkes you had to use them for something
15:16besides collecting dust it's such a weird long seating you can only have a conversation with the
15:25person next to you yeah I mean because you can you even put a TV up there no my TVs around the corner
15:30on an easel in order to watch TV we have to swing the television around this way and then we take these
15:38chairs and table so they're facing this direction oh boy no yeah hard pass where are we off today let's go
15:45this way okay oh my goodness first of all the different brick cracks me up this is the smallest
15:59kitchen ever and a big giant bridge right in the middle of the room so it's like if you're standing
16:04like this in the fridge nobody can get past not a lot of workspace no it's definitely way too small
16:12you can't make a whole pizza in there I want to show you what's behind the kitchen okay okay let's
16:18go this way okay so we're going down this hallway are we wow it's tight like my both my arms hit each side
16:30one hundred percent touching both walls is this a bathroom I'm I'd rather lose the bathroom and have
16:40a bigger kitchen if it were me yeah yeah head on down the angled steps I got a little vertical at the top of
16:55those steps guess what the steps did oh my gosh I'm gonna fall down these steps okay okay oh boy this brick
17:16it's kind of a wannabe bathtub you gotta get a leg in there this is work to get in okay let's go that
17:29way the very end of the hall okay I feel like the curtains are gonna open and a performance is gonna
17:39happen what is this murder corner this is a fireplace but doesn't work and it's like stub your toe in the middle of the night
17:50it's so close to the bed I'd be fearful and to the door it would spark right catch my bed on fire so what
18:00room is this oh oh look at that it's beyond sweet without a door you sit on the toilet and you can look
18:11in the mirror and look somebody's in there and they can see you I have a poo with a view too I can see you can you see me I can see you
18:21hi they should put like a special kind of mirror so you can't at an angle you can't
18:27all right there's no sir poo with a view thank you for showing me you're home thank you for coming
18:34it is lovely and weird thank you I'm gonna wish you good luck and then I'm gonna make my way up all
18:41right okay all right it's the third Little Pigs brick house appearance-wise this house is nothing but
18:50bricks and wood too many bricks not enough drywall functionally there's a tiny kitchen and tiny
18:57You can't prep food. There's not enough counter space.
19:00And a brick shower-slash-tub in one bathroom
19:04and an open layout in the other.
19:07There were two surprises.
19:08The narrowness of the hallway
19:11and the shifted stairs to go to your bedroom.
19:15Midwest, that was a sturdy choice.
19:21The Midwest was full of houses with hard rock,
19:23hard brick, and too many bricks,
19:26but only one will have a chance at that rocking home renovation.
19:32Midwest, there was nothing middle-of-the-road
19:35when it came to your ugly.
19:36While all three contenders were ugly enough
19:38to give America's heartland a heart attack,
19:41only one house can move on to the finals.
19:44It's between a concrete cave that's a dream come true for children
19:48and a nightmare for adults.
19:50Where do we go?
19:51From here.
19:53A former bank with a bathroom out of Fort Knox
19:55and a basement that will give you a run for your money.
19:58If you buy a place like this, you can bank on it sucking.
20:01They need to cash out.
20:03And a house that resembles an old pizza restaurant
20:07and gives the term brick-and-mortar new meaning.
20:10You got to...
20:11Yep, get a leg in there.
20:14Once again, I get to tell some lucky homeowners they are the ugliest house
20:20in their region.
20:21It's my favorite.
20:23Here we go.
20:25Here we go.
20:34Alex and Brandon!
20:35Hello!
20:37Hi!
20:38Um, guess what?
20:39You have the ugliest house in the Middle West.
20:42That's amazing!
20:43That's awesome!
20:45Thank you!
20:46Between your home's cavernous appearance and rocky function,
20:49your ugly left the others in the dust.
20:52Oh, my gosh.
20:53So exactly.
20:54If you move to the next round,
20:56you'll be that much closer to getting that renovation.
21:00That would be amazing.
21:01Yes.
21:02So I'm going to wish you luck.
21:04If you do move on, you'll hear from me.
21:06Thank you so much, Retta.
21:08Well done, bedrock bedlam.
21:09Your cave dwelling was a sinkhole of ugly.
21:12But is it ugly enough to take it all the way?
21:15There are still more ugly houses to see.
21:17They have a boat.
21:19Aye, aye, Captain.
21:20What is this house?
21:21Bring me to your leader.
21:22Oh, it's kitschy.
21:24Great Lakes?
21:26Ha ha.
21:27Hate lakes.
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