- 4/24/2025
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FunTranscript
00:01Good evening, everybody, and welcome to the Who's Line Is It Anyway.
00:05On tonight's show, private and confidential, Wayne Brady,
00:08top secret, Kathy Greenwood,
00:11for your eyes only, Colin Mochrie,
00:13and, yeah, go ahead, take a look, Ryan Stiles!
00:16And I'm your host, Secure, for our Dallas House of Five.
00:25Hello.
00:28Hello, and welcome to Who's Line Is It Anyway,
00:31the show where everything's made up and the points don't matter.
00:34That's right, the points are just like, I don't know,
00:36good taste to the man who makes Ryan's shoes.
00:47I'm just kidding around, I love Ryan's shoes.
00:52We've got a lot of show, let's get to it,
00:54with a game called Living Scenery.
00:55This is for all four of you.
00:56Now, Ryan and Colin are going to act out a scene for us,
00:58but doing the scene they're going to do,
01:00they're going to need a number of props.
01:01However, since you don't have any real props to work with,
01:03Wayne and Kathy are going to stand in
01:05and become the various props in the scene.
01:07Ryan and Colin, your scene is,
01:09two businessmen arrive at a gym and health spa.
01:12Two businessmen arrive at a gym and health spa.
01:14Gary?
01:15How's that new account going?
01:16Oh, it's not going too badly, thank you.
01:17Are you ready to work out?
01:18I thought I'd get in my...
01:19Let's get everything off.
01:21Hang everything up.
01:22Oh, it's the mirror.
01:23Hmm, you're looking good.
01:24I am looking damn good.
01:25All right, I'm just going to do a little on the treadmill.
01:29I am.
01:30Whoo!
01:31Wow.
01:32Oh, oh.
01:33.
01:34There you go.
01:35There you go.
01:36Oh, I'm a good guy laughing alright,
01:38there you go, I am so good shaking.
01:39Uh, I'm just going to do the little on the treadmill.
01:41I am.
01:54Whoa!
01:55Whoo!
01:57Wow!
01:59Oh! Oh!
02:01I just need a towel.
02:07Hey, don't wipe it all off.
02:09Let's go in the sauna.
02:11Get a little steam going.
02:13Or some water over the rocks.
02:15I'd better wear a towel.
02:17I think I'll, uh,
02:25I'll just go in au naturel.
02:27How long can I do that, too?
02:29Ugh.
02:31Ugh.
02:33I got no steam on my side.
02:37Ah, there we go.
02:39You gotta pour some water on the rocks.
02:41Blip, blip, blip.
02:43Ugh.
02:45Somebody left a donut.
02:49Ugh, well.
02:55I'm just going to, uh, use the, uh,
02:57the pulley thingy.
02:59All right? I'll sit over here in the jacuzzi
03:01and watch you.
03:02All right.
03:03Ugh.
03:05Doesn't really stretch out very far, does it?
03:09Whenever there's a...
03:11Oh! I have to readjust the tension.
03:13Ugh.
03:14There we go.
03:16There we go.
03:17Ah, there we go.
03:20Yeah.
03:21Yeah.
03:22Woo!
03:23Woo!
03:24Woo!
03:25Woo!
03:26Come on in the jacuzzi.
03:27Blip, blip, blip.
03:28Now when it's bubbling like that.
03:31Oh, you're already in.
03:32Ha, ha.
03:35Ugh.
03:36Woo, woo.
03:37That was good.
03:38That was so relaxed.
03:39I could, uh, use a massage.
03:41Mind if I lay down on your massage table?
03:43Sure!
03:44Ugh.
03:45Ugh!
03:49Ah!
03:50Ah.
03:51Ah!
03:53Ah!
03:55Ah!
04:00Yes!
04:01Yes!
04:02Ah!
04:04Let me just adjust the tension.
04:11Oh, man.
04:13It was sure fun to watch here live, wasn't it?
04:16That game is for Wayne Brady with Laura Holland and Taylor C.C. Guaro.
04:20We're going to do song styles for you.
04:22Song styles.
04:24Good job, C.C. Guaro.
04:27Hey, women in a sparkly shirt, what's your name?
04:31What's your name?
04:33Samantha?
04:34What do you do for a living Samantha?
04:35I'm an aerobics instructor.
04:37Okie dokie.
04:38Come on down here, Samantha.
04:39Yes, you are an aerobics instructor.
04:40I'm okay.
04:41Come on.
04:42Come on.
04:43Come on.
04:44Come on.
04:45Come on.
04:46Come on.
04:47Come on.
04:48Come on.
04:49Come on.
04:50You know, I kind of doubted you until you stood up.
05:00Yeah, I'm a aerobics instructor.
05:03And you're going to sing a song to Samantha, the aerobics instructor.
05:06Uh-huh.
05:07And you're going to sing to her in the style of river dance.
05:16Not only that, but as an extra added attraction, whenever you want to, the other guys are going
05:19to come down and join you.
05:21Oh, that'll be quick.
05:22That'll be quick.
05:23So take it away.
05:24We're going to be ready.
05:25To Samantha, the aerobics instructor.
05:27You can hear that.
05:28You can hear it.
05:29I've got the water.
05:30You can hear it.
05:31You can hear it.
05:32That's right.
05:33I heard it.
05:34Oh, that's right.
05:35You can hear it.
05:36I can hear it.
05:37You can hear it.
05:38Now hear the story I'll tell you ma'am.
05:43About a little girl named Sam
05:46She sings on and on
05:49Let's get physical like Olivia Newton-John
05:51Oh Sam, oh Sam
05:54Look how healthy I am
05:57Because it's my song
05:59And let me begin it
06:00Ooh, only 30 beats per minute
06:02Come along, come!
06:13Well, to get busy and dance
06:28I thought that there was my chance
06:31But let me tell you all, don't you see
06:35I didn't know she could actually river dance
06:37She said, she said, she said
06:41Oh, she said, she said
06:46A physically fit young man
06:49Thank you very much
06:54Thank you very much
06:56Thank you, Samantha
07:00Thank you very much
07:02Samantha, everybody, how about it?
07:06Thank you, Samantha
07:07Is that your boyfriend?
07:27Husband
07:28Husband?
07:29Oh, congratulations, buddy
07:30Good for you
07:33Hey, you know, some days
07:35She just loved coming to work
07:36You know what I'm saying?
07:37She actually started that
07:38I'm gonna give you
07:39You just
07:39Yeah, that thing kind of
07:44Throw us for a loop
07:45You're like, huh?
07:47All right
07:47Let's move on to a game now
07:49Called Two Line Vocabulary
07:50It's a real fun game
07:51For Ryan, Colin, and Wayne
07:52The idea of this game
07:53Is I'm gonna give our performers
07:54Two lines they can say
07:55They can't say anything else
07:57But these two lines
07:58The scene is
07:59Colin's a senior engineer
08:01How about that?
08:03Called in to help
08:04At the nuclear plant
08:05When two other engineers
08:06Ryan and Wayne
08:07Report a leak
08:08So they're reporting a leak
08:09To the senior engineer
08:10Wayne, the only lines
08:11You're allowed to say are
08:12That's not what you said earlier
08:13And what does that do?
08:15That's the only things
08:15You're allowed to say
08:16Ryan, the only things
08:17You're allowed to say are
08:18Oops, I did it again
08:19And are you enjoying this?
08:23Take it away
08:24With the nuclear
08:25Oops, I did it again
08:27I heard it over
08:28I heard there was a problem
08:29What's the deal?
08:31Oops, I did it again
08:32Oh, well, we'll have to
08:34Contain that right away
08:35Are you enjoying this?
08:36Well, not particularly
08:37This could cause problems
08:38This could cause destruction
08:39And death
08:40That's not what you said yesterday
08:41Well, because
08:45Nothing was wrong
08:45Yesterday, everything was fine
08:46Yeah, that's not
08:47What you said yesterday
08:48Oops, I did it again
08:50Don't do it
08:51You go
08:52You stand over there
08:53Don't go anywhere near that
08:54Are you enjoying this?
08:56Not as much as you'd think
08:57I'm tired of coming up here
08:59Cleaning up all your messes
09:00What does this do?
09:01Well, that
09:02That just
09:04Put on the air conditioning
09:05That's not what you said yesterday
09:06Because that's not
09:08Don't push that button
09:09What does that do?
09:10It's the same thing
09:11That's not what you said yesterday
09:12Look
09:13Don't you catch anything
09:15All right
09:15Put on that suit
09:16Your containment suit
09:17Put on your containment
09:18That's not what you said yesterday
09:19Shut up
09:19Shut up
09:20Put on your containment suit
09:26Are you enjoying this?
09:29I am not that hard up
09:33All right
09:34What are you doing?
09:37What does that do?
09:42Oops, I did it again
09:43It's just there for show
09:45What?
09:46What are you doing?
09:47What do you do?
09:48You spilled coffee on the controls
09:49There's no way of controlling this
09:50What does that do?
09:51Oops, I did it again
09:52Well, I'm doing it again
09:53Wait, quick, quick
09:55I want you to go into the center
09:56That's not what you said yesterday
09:57Are you enjoying this?
09:59No, I'm not
10:00Are you?
10:01Are you enjoying this?
10:02Move, I did it again
10:03All right, quick
10:04What does that do?
10:06What does that do?
10:09Does it clear that little thing
10:10You call a mind?
10:12That's not what you said yesterday
10:14Oops, I did it again
10:17All right, thank you very much
10:24We'll be right back
10:25With more Who's Line Is It Anyway?
10:26Ready or not?
10:26Don't go away
10:27Welcome back to Who's Line Is It Anyway?
10:35The show where everything's made up
10:37Hey, did you ever think the show
10:38Would be on the air this long?
10:39We didn't either
10:40Let's keep the show going
10:42With a game called
10:43Infomercials
10:44For Ryan and Colin
10:44And they're going to be
10:45Two guys on an infomercial
10:46Trying to sell a new Miracle product
10:47And they have to use the items
10:48In this box
10:49To help sell the product
10:50And I'm going to get a hand with it
10:51And what I need from the audience
10:53Is a personal problem you have
10:56That would be improved
10:56By a Miracle product
10:57Camerads
10:58Bad breath
10:59Bad breath
11:01Bad breath
11:03We're going to use
11:04Bad breath as the problem
11:06And you have to use
11:06All these items in the box
11:07To help cure bad breath
11:08Take it away, Ryan and Colin
11:09Hey, it's four o'clock
11:11It's time to shop, shop, shop
11:12Does your breath stink?
11:16We can smell you
11:17Through the camera
11:18You need our help, my friend
11:21Yeah, breath mints and gum
11:22Do the trick for a little while
11:24But to really alleviate
11:25That awful smell
11:26Have we got something for you
11:27We've come up with a program
11:28That will destroy your bad breath
11:30And it will never return
11:31Because it'll be too afraid
11:32To go into your mouth
11:33That's right, Colin
11:36You're not going to need
11:38One of these anymore
11:39With bad breath
11:39That's right
11:40Aren't you tired
11:42Of blowing your bad breath
11:43Up in the air?
11:44You won't have to
11:45I'm Canadian
11:49Hey, Colt
11:55What's that?
11:56It looks like something
11:57Magnified a thousand times
11:58That's right
11:59These are bad breath molecules
12:01Notice how they like
12:05To stick together
12:06Because stink clumps
12:08What happens is
12:12It comes out the mouth
12:13And wafts to an
12:15Woo, woo
12:17Does that smell?
12:18That's right
12:19And believe me
12:20You don't need a nose
12:22That size to smell it
12:23Now, let's show you
12:28How the two will work
12:29Colin, stick out your tongue
12:30Will you?
12:32We take the bad breath
12:33Off the tongue
12:34This will work
12:36When you buy it
12:37Taking the
12:39Scraping all the bad things
12:41Off the tongue
12:42Breathe on me now, Colt
12:49Oh, a bed of roses
12:51Bet the brakes is amazing
12:54Huh
12:58What do these have to do
13:02With bad breath?
13:04Who knows?
13:07Hey, Colt
13:08You know, sometimes
13:10To use the gerbil wheel
13:14I mean, bad breath scraper
13:17A lot of people
13:19Don't want to stick out
13:20Their tongue for that
13:21That's where this
13:22Comes in handy
13:22That's right
13:27Open up wide
13:29I like that
13:32Now, to make sure
13:35Your bad breath
13:35Is going away
13:37Use the bad breath
13:38Indicator
13:39Ryan
13:40Huh?
13:40Breathe
13:41Oh
13:42If it doesn't change color
13:44Your breath smells great
13:46If it turns black
13:47Get help right away
13:49Hey, we'll even throw
13:51On this
13:52Colin, I'm pregnant
13:53Sometimes
14:00If you have a really
14:01Bad breath problem
14:03We have to actually
14:04Root it out
14:05Ryan
14:07Yes?
14:08Swallow this entire thing
14:09All right
14:09It goes through
14:13The entire body
14:14And of course
14:41We'll be selling that
14:41Mesh after the show
14:42For five dollars
14:43A thousand points apiece
14:45Oh, God
14:46That went right through me
14:48Now, let's go on to a game
14:51One of my favorite games
14:52Actually, called
14:53Scenes from a Hat
14:53This is all four of you
14:54Scenes from a Hat
14:55And what we do is
14:58Before the show
14:59We ask the audience
14:59To write down suggestions
15:00For scenes
15:01And we take the good ones
15:02That we like
15:02And we put them in a hat
15:03And see how many
15:04Our performers can act out
15:05Starting with
15:06Things your mom says
15:09Or does
15:10That make you think
15:11She used to be a stripper
15:12Here's your roast beef, honey
15:19Mama's gonna mop
15:30Conversation topics
15:44That will derail
15:45A dinner party
15:46So, anyway
15:49It was coming out
15:50Of everywhere
15:51The first time
15:57You taste human flesh
15:58It's a little sickening
16:00Well, we are not
16:16Going to have any more
16:17Problems with that
16:17Henderson dog
16:18Are we?
16:18Things bald men
16:28Are sick of hearing
16:28Things bald men are sick of hearing
16:28Things bald men are sick of hearing
16:48We need your head
16:53To bounce the laser off
16:54Of to communicate
16:55With the satellite
16:55You're my only friend
17:09On this island
17:09No, I just had one
17:26I don't want to say anymore
17:28No, go on
17:29It's comedy
17:30Okay
17:34Will Johnny
17:36Take me to the prom
17:37I'll stop it now
17:54For you
17:55Oh, thanks
17:55Just in time
17:57It was the suggestion
17:58You know
17:58Yeah, stop at ten
17:59I say
18:00It's not me
18:00If rain man
18:03Had different jobs
18:04The points definitely
18:10Do not matter
18:10The points definitely
18:12Do not matter
18:12Take me five dollars
18:19Five dollars
18:20Five dollars
18:20All right
18:26Hillbilly dating service videos
18:28I'd like to meet someone
18:33Outside the family
18:34Hey, welcome back to
18:47Who's out
18:48Who's out
18:48Who's out
18:48Who's out
18:48Who's out
18:49Who's out
18:49Now
18:51For the game
18:54That we're going to be forced
18:54To do
18:55Which is called
18:56Hoedown
18:57Hoedown
18:59Hoedown
19:00Hoedown
19:00Hoedown
19:02Loves playing that hoedown
19:03We need a suggestion
19:05From the audience
19:05Of a first
19:06That you'll remember
19:07For the rest of your life
19:08A first
19:08We'll do the first kiss
19:11No, we'll do the kiss
19:12Hoedown
19:13With help of Laura Hall
19:14Take it away
19:15When you get a kiss
19:24You get a kiss on the mouth
19:26I've been kissed
19:27Lots of times
19:28I'm from Florida
19:28That's the South
19:29My first kiss
19:31Brother, it was the bomb
19:33It wasn't from a girl
19:34In high school
19:35It was from my mom
19:37Well, my first job
19:42Was in fast food
19:43Don't you know
19:44The hours were real long
19:46And the pay was real low
19:48My boss told me
19:50That he didn't like my sass
19:51So my first kiss
19:53Was a hearty
19:54Kiss my ass
19:55My first kiss
20:04Is something I won't forget
20:06It was really luscious
20:08Boy, it was wet
20:10It really changed my life
20:12I'll never be the same
20:13Oh, I wish I could remember
20:16The guy's name
20:17My first kiss
20:26Happened when I was really drunk
20:28But she wouldn't kiss me
20:30Cause she said my breast stunk
20:31When it came to that date
20:33I was really in a rut
20:35I should've run some string
20:37Through my mouth
20:38Nothing out of my butt
20:39I'll be right back
20:45I'm going to be right over there
20:46Welcome back to
20:51He's Lover's Anyway
20:52Today we're going to end the credits
20:53With everybody
20:54Remember Samantha, the Roberts instructor
20:55They're going to read the credits for you
20:57As if they were attending the Roberts class
20:58From Samantha
20:59Thanks everybody
20:59Good night
21:00You carry Dan Leverington
21:05You need more
21:07Look it out
21:08Hey Mark
21:09Look it out
21:10Who's better?
21:11You think the host is going to be doing this
21:13Here he is, he ain't million
21:16Give me
21:17Give me
21:18Give me
21:19Give me
21:20Give me
21:20How's your best?
21:22I can't
21:23I can't
21:25I can't
21:26I can't
21:27I can't
21:28I can't
21:29I can't
21:30I can't
21:31I can't
21:32I can't
21:33I can't
21:34I can't
21:35I can't
21:36I can't
21:37I can't
21:38I can't
21:39I can't
21:40I can't
21:41I can't
21:42I can't
21:43I can't
21:44I can't
21:45I can't
21:46I can't
21:47I can't
21:48I can't
21:49I can't
21:50I can't
21:51I can't
21:52I can't
21:53I can't
21:54I can't
21:55I can't
21:56I can't
21:57I can't
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