- 4/24/2025
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00:01Good evening, everybody, and welcome to
00:04Whose Line Is It Anyway on tonight's show.
00:06Aw, jeez. It's Rayne Brady.
00:09Gee, Willikers, it's Kathy Greenwood.
00:11Criminy Pete, it's Colin Mochrie.
00:14And holy sh-sh-shaving cream, it's Ryan Stiles!
00:19And I'm your host, Zachary. Come on down, let's have some fun.
00:22Holy sh-sh-shaving cream!
00:34Welcome to Whose Line Is It Anyway, the show where everything's made up and the points don't matter.
00:37That's right, the points are like a wicker bedpan.
00:41They don't matter.
00:42Let's get started with a game called Questions Only.
00:45This is for all four of you. Kathy and Wayne, you're gonna start a scene, but you can only speak in questions.
00:48This is also a great party game. If you're ever at a party, there's no booze or chicks.
00:51And, uh, what happens is they try to stay out here as long as they can, only speaking in questions.
00:57And if they mess up, I buzz them out, and the other one takes their place, trying to see who can stay out here the longest.
01:02The scene is, uh, romance breaks out at a luxurious European health spa.
01:06Take it away.
01:08Have you seen my towel?
01:12Is this yours?
01:14Isn't this teeny?
01:19Can you always do that?
01:20Would you be mine?
01:25Are you asking me to be yours?
01:28Would you stay with me in this spa forever?
01:31Would you never leave me?
01:33Do you want a massage?
01:36Would you rub my neck?
01:40Are you really a man?
01:42How did you know?
01:43I'm sorry, that's my mistake. Keep on going. That was the question.
01:44Did you hear something?
01:45Are you just trying to find a way to get out of here now?
01:57Do I look like I want to stay?
01:59Do you not love me because I'm a man?
02:02I don't know.
02:06Now you can work.
02:08Would you like a towel?
02:10Do you have an extra large?
02:16Would this do the trick?
02:17Can you guess which part of Europe I am from?
02:22What do I get if I guess correctly?
02:24Wouldn't you like to know?
02:30Did you see an odd looking woman walk through here a few seconds ago?
02:35Are you still on that?
02:36Where's the manager?
02:38I don't know.
02:41Comment ça va?
02:45Okay?
02:47Are you the man offering free massages?
02:50Want one?
02:51Do I?
02:55Do you work out much?
02:57Why are your hands so soft?
03:00Would you believe that's not my hand?
03:04Would it be wrong of me to use the word lower?
03:19Have you ever felt in this way?
03:22What did you say?
03:23What did you say?
03:32Can you still love me?
03:37Would you take them out again?
03:40Can't you see that's the way I prefer you?
03:54A thousand points for everybody but Wayne.
03:56Hey thanks for this buddy.
03:59Thanks for that visual.
04:00I have enough trouble falling asleep at night.
04:02I'll see you tonight baby.
04:03Yeah.
04:08Okay.
04:10Next we're going to have a game called sound effects.
04:11This is for Ryan and Colin.
04:12Come on down here Ryan and Colin.
04:14Come over here.
04:16What's your name please?
04:18Ruth.
04:19Nice to meet you Ruth.
04:20Come on up here say hello to Ryan and Colin.
04:23What's your name?
04:25Lisa?
04:26Lisa.
04:27I want you, Ruth and Lisa I want you to stand right here on top of this thing.
04:37Here's a microphone for you.
04:39Here's a microphone for you.
04:40What's going to happen?
04:42Ruth you're going to do sound effects for Colin during the scene.
04:45And Lisa you're going to do sound effects for Ryan.
04:48And they're going to do a scene.
04:49The scene is there are two American GIs attempting the great escape from a WW2 German prisoner of war camp.
05:06A World War II German prisoner of war camp.
05:09So take it away whenever you're ready.
05:11I'm sick of this place I tell you sick.
05:15Four o'clock.
05:16Time to escape.
05:17Right.
05:19I have a plan.
05:21All right.
05:23You want to hear it?
05:24Yes.
05:25Sorry.
05:26What?
05:27I should never have the three bean salad.
05:30Come on let's get to it.
05:31The salad's going to be coming up.
05:35I'll open the door.
05:37Turn off the sprinkler.
05:38Yes.
05:40Then we'll run by the gate.
05:41Right.
05:42Dig underneath and run.
05:43Okay.
05:45I can barely hear you.
05:46Let me just turn off the radio.
05:48All right.
05:50And let's hope that only the sound effects that happen once we prompt them.
05:54Right.
05:55Will happen.
05:56Right.
06:00Oil that down.
06:04That's better.
06:06Quiet.
06:08Very quiet.
06:09We have to sneak past the dogs quietly.
06:10Go on your tiptoes.
06:15Done.
06:16I shouldn't be wearing my hot puppies.
06:20Take them off.
06:22Quiet.
06:23Oh.
06:24Oh.
06:29Boy they're having bad dreams.
06:30It's all right.
06:31Okay we're past.
06:32We've got to dig our way out of here.
06:34Do you have anything to dig with?
06:35Shovel.
06:36Oh.
06:37I don't know.
06:38Oh my God.
06:39There's someone in there.
06:40Oh.
06:41Come out.
06:42Go.
06:43Go.
06:44Go.
06:45Go.
06:46Go.
06:47Who is that?
06:48Hey guys.
06:49There's already a tunnel.
06:50They're home.
06:51It's the girls from the camp across the lake.
06:56All right.
06:57Let's jump in.
06:58Right.
06:59How?
07:04Boy.
07:05You know the corduroy pants they put us in.
07:07I know.
07:08It does.
07:15All right.
07:17Let's take our way through.
07:18The hatch must be on the other side.
07:21There seems to be a chicken on it.
07:27Push.
07:28Push.
07:29Help me.
07:30Push.
07:31All right.
07:32Pull yourself up.
07:33Oh.
07:34There's a ladder.
07:35It's like we're in the clear.
07:37Oh no.
07:38The alarm.
07:43Car.
07:49You better stop.
07:50You better talk German.
07:51Right.
07:52Harkun.
07:53Ja.
07:54Ja.
07:55Ja.
07:56I had no idea what they were saying.
07:58Let's get the hell out of here.
07:59Okay.
08:02Nothing.
08:05Battery must be dead.
08:09Oh.
08:10Those two wires are loose.
08:11I'll just...
08:12Be careful.
08:13All right.
08:14I don't want you to electrocute yourself on the battery.
08:15Oh.
08:16I've done this a thousand times.
08:17All right.
08:18There's no way I could possibly electrocute myself.
08:19Give her a time.
08:20It's not going to happen.
08:21All right.
08:22I know this.
08:23I will never ever electrocute myself.
08:24Get to it, Batman.
08:25Go go crazy.
08:26See?
08:27All right.
08:28We'll be right back with our Who's Line.
08:29Remember this.
08:30Don't go away.
08:31Welcome back to Who's Line Is It Anyway?
08:32Hey!
08:33If you want a free Who's Line Is It Anyway t-shirt, here's what you do.
08:38Take out an old t-shirt and a black marking pen and right across the front of it write,
08:44Whose Line Is It Anyway?
08:46Whose Line Is It Anyway?
08:47Woo hoo hoo.
08:48Who's Line Is It Anyway?
08:49Hey!
08:50If you want a free Who's Line Is It Anyway t-shirt, here's what you do.
08:53Take out an old t-shirt and a black marking pen and right across the front of it write,
08:57Whose Line Is It Anyway?
08:59.
09:02Let's continue the show with a game called Scenes From A Hat.
09:05Let's call for it.
09:06Now, before the show we ask the audience to write down different suggestions for scenes
09:12that they want to see acted out.
09:13they want to see act it out.
09:13We take the good ones
09:14and we put them in the hat
09:15and let's see how many
09:16they can act out for us.
09:17Starting with
09:18compliments you give
09:20your prom date
09:21that will definitely
09:21get your face slapped.
09:26You don't sweat much
09:27for a fat girl.
09:39Oh!
09:40Wow.
09:41I am going to get some, huh?
09:47All right.
09:49Inappropriate comments
09:50from the priest
09:51at your wedding.
09:56Way to go.
10:03Hey, that was an excellent
10:04confession yesterday.
10:05Okay.
10:11You may now kiss the cow.
10:12Bride.
10:13Bride.
10:18Everyone's getting married.
10:19That's great.
10:20Married.
10:28You have a good man
10:30and your husband.
10:31I know.
10:38Okay.
10:39People who shouldn't work naked.
10:52Welcome to the stage,
10:53if you will,
10:54Kathy Lee.
11:02Oh, yeah.
11:02She's great.
11:08My fellow Americans.
11:10original rejected poses
11:32for the Mona Lisa.
11:33said.
11:50Thousand points to whoever was in that
11:56for whatever you did.
11:59Let's go on to a game called
12:00Greatest Hits. This is for Ryan, Colin, and Wayne
12:02with Laura Hall and Linda Taylor.
12:05Underneath the audience is a suggestion
12:10of a profession in which you carry a gun.
12:15International Spy.
12:17We'll say
12:18James Bond, International Spy.
12:21Colin and Ryan are going to be
12:22TV commercial pitchmen talking about the latest
12:24compilation album they're trying to sell.
12:25We're going to make up the titles of the songs
12:27and Wayne's going to try to sing them with the help of Laura and Linda.
12:30Take it away whenever you're ready.
12:31Songs of James Bond, International Spy.
12:33Hi. We'll be right back to our
12:36wildlife documentary, Funky,
12:38the Diuretic Hippo, in just a second.
12:41But first,
12:42have we got a deal for you.
12:44Oh, as long as there's been music, there's been music
12:46about spies. And who's our favorite spy?
12:49James Bond.
12:50Exactly.
12:51Dr. No, Goldfinger, Octop...
12:54I don't think I can say the rest of that one, but...
12:56Still, some of our favorite
12:58movies and our favorite songs.
13:00Oh, and so many styles to choose from.
13:07What are you doing? Choking?
13:11I'm sorry. Was I speaking Hawaiian?
13:13I don't know. I'm Canadian.
13:15You know...
13:16I spent many, many, many years
13:21in Hawaii as part of the Navy.
13:26And I love the music
13:27as much as I love the people.
13:29And I think one of my favorite
13:31traditional songs over in Hawaii was
13:33How does an old guy like me
13:35get such young chicks?
13:48Tiny women
13:49looking at me
13:52I continue to date them
13:54even though I'm
13:55a hundred and three
13:57All of these scantily clad women
14:00walk right through my door
14:02And they'll lay down for you
14:03if you were me
14:05Sean Connery or Roger Moore
14:07How does an old man get such young women?
14:09I don't know
14:10Christmas in Hawaii. Don, ho, ho, ho.
14:38Ho, ho, ho.
14:41Oh!
14:43We're back on.
14:44Oh, no. I was just, uh, thinking.
14:53What's the matter, Ryan?
14:54I'm blue.
14:56Did I say blues?
14:57You know...
14:58I love blues, Colin.
15:03Oh, boy.
15:04And it's funny.
15:05When I listen to blues,
15:06I get blue.
15:08What are the odds?
15:09Well, unlike rock,
15:11when I listen to rock,
15:11I don't feel like a rock.
15:13Oh, you're kidding yourself.
15:17And, you know,
15:17I think one of my favorite blues...
15:20Was I talking about blues?
15:21You were talking about blues.
15:21One of my favorite blues songs
15:23of all times has to be
15:25My Shoe is a Gun.
15:27I got things hidden on my body
15:46that you will not understand.
15:47My arms are satellite.
15:51My left, left, and the right.
15:52They are forming canons.
15:56But here's one thing
15:58that your average spy cannot do.
16:01I've got to sell you plug up my butt
16:02and my shoe.
16:05My shoe is a phone.
16:06I call home.
16:09My shoe is a phone.
16:11Yeah, yeah, yeah.
16:12My shoe is a phone.
16:14My ass is a computer.
16:16My chest is sometimes rendered
16:19without a Roto-Rooter.
16:22My shoe.
16:23Yeah, my shoe is a phone.
16:28What a hundred and eighty.
16:38If only life were that simple.
16:40If only.
16:41Hey, Ryan,
16:42when I say to you,
16:43license to kill,
16:44what do you think of?
16:44My ex-wife.
16:47No, I'm talking, of course,
16:48about Jerry Van Dyke.
16:49Oh.
16:50Who worked...
16:51I knew him
16:54when his name was
16:55Jerry Van Lesbian.
16:56Years and years ago.
16:57Really?
17:01But I digress.
17:02You certainly do.
17:05Anyway,
17:06Jerry Van Dyke
17:07worked with the next artist
17:08that we're going to showcase.
17:09Oh.
17:10The late,
17:11great,
17:11wonderful Broadway star.
17:13Once you've heard
17:14this woman's voice,
17:15you'll never
17:16forget it.
17:17I'm talking about
17:18the incomparable
17:19Ethel Merman.
17:21Yeah!
17:22Yeah!
17:25And who can forget
17:26her big hit,
17:28Blofeld on My Mind.
17:29Well,
17:37I'm just chillin'
17:39Blofeld,
17:40I'm assuming
17:41he's a villain.
17:43I will sing it this time,
17:45Blofeld on my mind.
17:48There's no business
17:50like spy business.
17:52You can run around
17:53and shoot a gun.
17:54But shootin'
17:55Blofeld
17:56is a dizzy
17:57and God
17:59it's a lot of fun.
18:01And Blofeld
18:02on my mind.
18:04Blofeld,
18:05I'm so tired.
18:07I've got
18:07Blofeld,
18:08hey what the hell.
18:10Blofeld
18:11on my mind.
18:15All right,
18:20here we come back on
18:21and find out who the
18:21winner is,
18:22and we'll be right back.
18:31The winner is, we'll be right back.
18:37Yes.
18:38Welcome back to Who's Iron Man?
18:39Right, French winner, Kathy Greenwood.
18:41Kathy Greenwood is the winner.
18:43So the rest of us are going to do a little song for you called,
18:47a game for you called Irish Drinking Song is what it's called.
18:49And we're going to make up an Irish drinking song for you,
18:51one line at a time with the help of Laura Hall on the piano.
18:55Right?
18:57All we need from you guys is a suggestion of something
19:00that might have happened to you or would happen to you
19:01that you would want to keep secret.
19:04Get arrested.
19:05Get arrested.
19:07Get arrested, Irish drinking song.
19:09Take it away, Laura Hall, one line at a time.
19:12Oh, I-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee.
19:17I was driving down the road.
19:19I was driving fast.
19:21I was stopped by the cops.
19:23I knew it wouldn't last.
19:24He grabbed me and he cuffed me.
19:26And kicked me in the rump.
19:27And then he looked me in the eye.
19:30Oh, a speed bump.
19:31Oh, I-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee.
19:35Oh, I went to jail that night.
19:37Boy, it was so tough.
19:39All the other guys laughed at me.
19:41They treated me real rough.
19:42Oh, when I took a shower.
19:44Oh, when I took a bath.
19:46The soap fell right on the floor.
19:48And I began to laugh.
19:49Oh, I-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee.
19:52The bars really depressed me.
19:55I gon' go no more.
19:57Because I'm stuck here.
19:58My mother is a whore.
20:00Boy, that's a problem.
20:02But I don't care.
20:04Because you understand.
20:05I'm wearing her underwear.
20:07Oh, I-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee.
20:10Oh, people think I'm strange now.
20:13People think I'm weird.
20:14People think I'm funny.
20:16But I'm not a beard.
20:18I don't care what people say.
20:22I'll dance and sing all day.
20:23I'll redecorate.
20:24I'm gay.
20:25Oh, I-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee,
20:28Oh, I-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee.
20:37Are we right now?
20:39Welcome back to Who's Island?
20:43Welcome back to Who's Island?
20:46Tonight we're going to have Kathy Greenwood read the credits for you.
20:50Kathy, why don't you read the credits as a drunk with no inhibitions.
20:55You're drunk with all inhibitions.
20:56Thanks for watching, everybody. Good night.
20:58And Sam Patterson, and Kyle Patterson,
21:01and Drew Carey, and Ryan Stiles.
21:04And Mark Patterson again, and Bruce Gowers,
21:07and Char-Carr, and Drew Carey.
21:11Oh, thanks, baby.
21:13Cheers to Eric Wilker. I love you!
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