Sumo and The Mortician

Beasley Digital

Dave & Chuck the Freak talk about a female sumo wrestler who broke into someone's house to retrieve her stolen cat named after James Bond. She brought her mortician friend along with her and the show imagines the pair as a tag-team wrestling duo.

Transcript

00:00i'm not sure i'd mess with a female sumo wrestling champion i didn't know they existed

00:10i didn't either to be honest and there's a 27 year old woman named helen del popolo

00:18she's from westfield new jersey she is a middleweight national champion in sumo wrestling

00:24while she recently had her roommate move out that roommate took helen's cat named james bond

00:32so what did helen do well helen wanted to get her pussy back helen went to her former roommate's

00:43house in pennsylvania she brought her friend a 34 year old woman who's a mortician oh no

00:51when the ex-roommate saw a sumo champ and a mortician breaking down her door to try and

01:07get james bond back she ran yeah in the end though helen and lauren got out of there with the cat

01:15but now they've both been arrested for burglary criminal trespass and assault it's funny to

01:22bring a mortician with you i know lisa is very interested in the story but really the only

01:27thing she really wants is to see james bond yes what does james bond look like well i got a picture

01:34to show you there we go put a picture up at davidjepthefreak.com there's james bond yep

01:38gotta get james bond back that is helen and that is james bond her pussy he's like i'm back

01:45he's cool he's got a cool face he is cool i like how his like little lips or whatever are white

01:53yeah and he's got a like the black chin hello that was a wild winking

01:59yes if he spoke with a british accent it would make it even better yeah i i feel like helen could

02:07mess you up if she wanted to yeah helen is much tougher than any of us yes sumo wrestling people

02:13are tough yes they are they're not just like big fat people pushing each other around i mean the

02:19strength yeah so she's like they allow themselves like to eat and get huge but at the same time that

02:25i think they're like doing stuff to like be huge underneath all of that yeah chub too she's

02:30just like ah like the dwarf exploded in the splinters i bet meet my mortician friend give me james

02:40bond i just see the friend i just i feel like the friend is just like paul bearer from

02:46yeah what a duo yeah that's crazy sumo and the mortician yeah i mean it's like the undertaker

03:00shows up

03:01bust your door in

03:06yeah

03:08oh you've really screwed up now here kitty kitty kitty you've upset my friend my sumo wrestling friend

03:20you've upset them and now you're gonna pay the ultimate price you're gonna die you're gonna die

03:31you're listening to sumo and the mortician yeah on david chuck the brick i wouldn't buy that tag

03:35teams t-shirt i know you would i know you would what a a crazy pair yeah the mortician aspect of it's

03:44great and then meanwhile james bond's like oh my mom said she's crazy yeah yeah you shouldn't have

03:50messed with my mom you shouldn't have messed with me mom james bond needs his own instagram account

03:55i would follow him i bet he probably has it yeah he's an incredible cat i don't know if i had that

04:01cat i might think about it that cat has an awesome face yeah he does he's a cool looking cat yeah um

04:07that's the sumo yeah yeah right that's the big i call this one the cremation bitch

04:14i call this one the cremation bitch

04:20oh there's there you go yep there you go yeah it was they brought they showed up with about uh

04:27you know 400 pounds of fun yeah oh yeah yeah i'll get that cat back yeah nothing middleweight about

04:35them no one went through the door one went through the wall man style that helen is a

04:43masculine looking lady yeah yeah yeah i wouldn't say that to her no i wouldn't say it to her face

04:48but honestly you just saw that picture yeah i think it was a guy yeah total dude

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