- 7/4/2025
#ShowFilm98
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00In the world of modern dating, where romance has been reduced to a swipe of the screen, there is one man who still believes in finding love the old-fashioned way.
00:14I met my wife Fruitcake in the street. She had this incredible smile, beautiful eyes, and there was the energy, and I couldn't control myself. I was drawn to her.
00:30On the dating apps, it doesn't seem real. It's almost like a card game. You're just collecting people.
00:36I've been ghosted, catfished. Where do I start? I've just been swiping, and nothing. There's just nothing.
00:44In the heart of Britain's most romantic city, Fred and his team are matching hopeful singletons in a place where love is always on the menu.
00:57There's been phobia everywhere. Mine will always get stuck on my boob shelf.
01:01These daters... How old are you? Old enough for you.
01:05...are searching for the one... Oh, my God! ...in the real world.
01:10I grazed my needles this morning. It's all in for you. Oh, my God!
01:16For some... All right, what's the kidding? All right!
01:22...stepping into the unknown... How are you with your technology?
01:25Rubbish. I'm a dinosaur. Oh, thank goodness.
01:28If I want to get in contact with you, I have to WhatsApp you.
01:31Don't get too ahead of yourself.
01:33...can lead to surprising sparks.
01:36You keep blushing! I don't know what's going on.
01:38But finding a connection... What's the dynamic here?
01:43Epic is yours. ...isn't always easy.
01:47Help me!
01:49In the end... Hey, hey, hey.
01:51...it comes down to one... Hello. Hello.
01:55...big... This isn't awkward. ...question.
01:57Hello, Chris. Do you guys want to see each other again?
02:01This is the First Dates Restaurant.
02:19Good morning. Hey, bonjour. Good morning.
02:22How are you feeling? We are back. Ready. Yeah.
02:25So, we have two new member of staff. We have Gerald, who comes from New York, right?
02:29New York City. And we've got Kyle.
02:31Hello. I'm from Wales, South Wales.
02:33And, yeah, I've just come to see people fall in love.
02:37What we do here is unique.
02:39And we have delivered now for how long, Merlin?
02:41Twelve years. Twelve years!
02:43Twelve years!
02:45You didn't have any grey hair when we started.
02:47Nor did you!
02:48No.
02:50And I wasn't married.
02:51That's amazing!
02:55My wife, she's coming down for a drink later on.
02:58Yay!
02:59So...
03:00Woo-hoo-hoo!
03:01OK, let's go.
03:02Let's do this.
03:03Let's go. Woo!
03:07Cocktail, a new one.
03:12Tired of waiting in the bath, 26-year-old Connor just wants to be taken seriously.
03:18I would say that I'm a serial dater, to be completely honest.
03:21But I probably think the biggest misconception is that I'm, like, a massive cheater and this and that.
03:27Because I've got the turkey teeth, I've got the tattoos. I'm quite tall. I'm almost like a walking red flag.
03:33But, like, I'm actually a nice guy.
03:39Oh, oh, oh, hello.
03:40Ooh.
03:41That's a very self-assured confident walk.
03:43Yeah.
03:44I hope this is my last first date for a while.
03:46Come with me.
03:47Let's see what we can do.
03:48You're so smiling.
03:49That's so large.
03:50And he's taller than Fred.
03:52Well, congratulations as well for getting married.
03:54Thank you really much.
03:55Yeah, yeah.
03:56Hopefully it'll be me one day.
03:57Well, for sure.
03:58Well, you are here.
03:59I'm sort of at the stage now where I'm a bit too old for stuff that's just casual.
04:04I'm at Larchan's saloon.
04:06Let me get your drink.
04:07Can I get a Long Island iced tea?
04:09Long Island coming up?
04:10That's the strongest one, so I feel that will ease my nerves.
04:13So what kind of girls do you like, man?
04:15I usually go for some that's a bit like a barbie to me, so that kind of vibe.
04:19By the woman, I'd say just someone that's quite fun-loving and easy to get on with,
04:25but do like a blonde, not going to lie.
04:28Hey, Barbie, I like your style.
04:32I've heard you've described yourself as sexy and goofy.
04:37Yeah, I think when I said that, I'd probably had something to drink,
04:42but I probably had a glass of wine.
04:44Tech consultant Charlie is putting the numbers aside
04:48to discover the true formula for love.
04:54I love, like, analytical stuff.
04:57So, yes, I am quite geeky.
05:00You are like a ray of sunshine.
05:04Do you go on mini dates?
05:06No, no, not really.
05:07You don't?
05:08I don't like to.
05:09I'm fed up with the dating scene.
05:11I don't want to be on dating apps.
05:13I would rather just talk to one person and get to know them.
05:16I'm not a serial dater.
05:18Do you know what you're looking for?
05:20Someone that's kind, confident, but not a show-off.
05:23Teeth is quite a big one for me,
05:25because I do stare at people's mouths quite a lot.
05:27Not in, like, a horrible way,
05:29but it's just nice that someone has, like, a nice warm smile.
05:32Hi.
05:33Are you all right?
05:34Nice to meet you.
05:35I'm Charlie.
05:36I'm Connor.
05:37Nice to meet you, Connor.
05:38So, what was the commute like from heaven?
05:40That was very good.
05:43Can I get a margarita, please?
05:45Yes.
05:46Thank you so much.
05:47So, where do you actually come from?
05:48London.
05:49OK.
05:50Where do you come from?
05:51I live in Guildford, sorry.
05:52Oh, I know Guildford, yeah.
05:53So, we're fairly close.
05:54Yes, we are.
05:55What do you actually do for work, then?
05:56I work for a tech consultancy.
05:59Oh, OK, OK.
06:00Thank you so much.
06:01It's a pleasure.
06:02You have lots of tattoos as well.
06:04Yes, I've got my leg.
06:05I've got one on my chest.
06:06Oh, my gosh.
06:07I've got one on my back as well.
06:08Nice.
06:09We'll save that for the second date.
06:10Yeah, fine.
06:12What do you do for work?
06:13You've got really nice eyes as well, by the way.
06:15My eyes?
06:16Yeah, you've got really nice eyes.
06:17Thanks, yours are nice as well.
06:19I'm a carpenter.
06:20Are you?
06:21Nice.
06:23Yeah, I like someone that's got hands on.
06:25There.
06:26Yeah.
06:29You couldn't have picked anyone better.
06:31Yes, this is off to a good start, isn't it?
06:33Come with me.
06:35Let's go.
06:3629-year-old business owner Sophie is hoping to add romance to her agenda.
06:42I definitely did not used to look like this.
06:46Yeah, with bright-coloured hair.
06:49I used to work in the law, so tattoos weren't really kind of encouraged.
06:55I changed my career and started getting covered in tattoos.
07:01Nice to meet you, Sophie.
07:02I'm too.
07:03It's nice to meet you, Fred.
07:04What an incredible look you have here with all your tattoos.
07:08My children are my entire world.
07:10But I think I've got more love to give and it would be nice to be able to find another person to be able to share that with.
07:17Can I get you a drink?
07:18Yes, please.
07:19Can I have a porn star?
07:20Yes, you can.
07:22How are you feeling about things?
07:24Yeah, I'm good.
07:25Good.
07:26I'm nervous.
07:27Natural.
07:28Totally natural, yeah.
07:29Talk to me about the sort of person you want to meet today.
07:31So, I'm actually looking for somebody that is an alternative woman.
07:37I'm a bisexual woman, so I'm looking for a romantic relationship with a woman.
07:43I have female friends, but, you know, I think I'm looking for something that's a bit of a stronger connection than that.
07:49I quite like tattoos.
07:51I like coloured hair.
07:52I like it's people that embrace some individuality.
07:55Yeah.
07:56Something a bit different outside the norm.
07:57My ideal woman is like Megan Fox.
08:04Sophie's date is Emily, a massage therapist who's a pro at releasing stress.
08:12Growing up, I was always like the weird kid.
08:15To be honest, my mum's quite, like, punk, so she raised me on, like, the sex pistols.
08:22I was always taught to express myself and just be whoever I wanted to be.
08:32You're dressed to kill.
08:33I am.
08:34I'm given fox leopard.
08:36Yeah.
08:37I was thinking Betty Boo, you know?
08:38Oh, yeah.
08:39I love that.
08:40Yeah.
08:41Yeah, I love that.
08:42I identify as bisexual, which to me means I'm attracted to all women and a very specific type of man.
08:53Your date is at the bar.
08:54Amazing.
08:55Look behind me.
08:56Have a look.
08:57Can you see behind the bar there?
08:58I like alternative women, obviously, tattoos, just because we'd look cute together, to be honest.
09:04I love that for us.
09:05Enjoy.
09:07Have fun.
09:09Hello.
09:10Hi.
09:11Wow.
09:12I love you.
09:13I'm freezing.
09:14I'm so sorry.
09:15Nice to meet you.
09:16I'm Emily.
09:17Nice to meet you, Emily.
09:18You look stunning.
09:19I love this.
09:20So do you.
09:21I wasn't sure if this was a bit OTT, but, you know...
09:23No, I love it.
09:24I've honestly been so nervous.
09:26Have you?
09:27Now.
09:28I'm kind of chilled.
09:29You're feeling chilled.
09:30Yeah.
09:31That's good.
09:32That's good.
09:33No need to be nervous.
09:34No.
09:35No.
09:36No.
09:37Is it just me, or do you think that since he's been married, he is happier and a better mood?
09:45He just seems really happy.
09:46He certainly seems more settled, more grounded.
09:48Yeah.
09:49Maybe that's what it is.
09:51Do you have any funny, like, stories?
09:58Like, have you embarrassed yourself recently?
10:00Last year, I was seeing a girl, and she's put me on, like, a Facebook group saying, like,
10:05don't date this guy.
10:06Yeah.
10:07Oh, gosh.
10:08Why is that?
10:09I think she was just bitter, to be completely honest.
10:12I was, like, pretty sure out of her.
10:14I think she was a bit older than me.
10:15She was, like, eight years older than me.
10:17Ah.
10:18She went on another date, maybe three weeks later.
10:21Like, the day after, she screenshotted this and sent it to me.
10:24And, like, can I do better?
10:25I was, like, you don't even know, Mick.
10:27Like, what?
10:28Yeah.
10:29Oh, my gosh.
10:30Yeah.
10:31So, my dating life, it was a little bit coward, I'm not going to lie.
10:36I would say that I probably have commitment issues just because, like, when my first girlfriend,
10:41she didn't cheat on me, but it was a bit like, you know, the Ross and Rachel situation.
10:44Like, we were on a break.
10:45It was the same sort of thing.
10:47And, like, it's not really a nice thing to have happen to you.
10:51So, I just feel as if since then, I'm, like, I'm scared of getting hurt, to be honest.
11:00I've taken a bit of a step back.
11:01Like, I've deleted dating apps.
11:03I just feel as if now I've got the clear head space to give someone my all.
11:07To be honest, when I saw you coming, I was like, Jesus Christ.
11:13I was, like, shaking.
11:21How does the wage feel?
11:22Better nerves, right?
11:24But, yeah, it's, um...
11:27It's different.
11:28It is definitely different.
11:30Isn't his date coming?
11:31Well, I hope so.
11:32Actually...
11:36What's your date in, like, history?
11:40So, I'm actually really not practised in dating at all.
11:44OK.
11:46This is my first date with a woman.
11:49Really?
11:50Yeah, so...
11:52Well, you're doing great.
11:53I would not think this was your first date with a woman, ever.
11:56Like, I'm not getting that vibe at all, so...
11:59I've always, kind of, thought I was bisexual, but never explored it.
12:03I'm too afraid to, kind of, come out about it.
12:06Yeah, of course.
12:07But it's nerve-wracking.
12:09And I'm glad they chose you.
12:10Yeah!
12:11I'm glad they chose me and it's, like, yeah, it's such an honour to, like, be your first date.
12:18Well, you're stunning.
12:19So are you.
12:21Yeah, you are very my type, sure.
12:24You very much are.
12:27So, erm...
12:29I'm married.
12:32Really?
12:34Yeah.
12:39So, erm...
12:42I have a question for you.
12:44OK.
12:47My husband is at the bar.
12:52Would you like to meet him?
12:54Would you like to meet him?
12:55Yeah.
12:56Yeah.
12:57Yeah.
12:58It is.
12:59So, yeah.
13:00We found each other on Tinder.
13:01What was the first thing you said to me?
13:02Yep.
13:03Do you know the Muffin Man?
13:04And my response was, who lives on Jewelry Lane?
13:05So we bonded over Shrek, didn't we?
13:06Mm-hm.
13:07Typical parents.
13:08That's exactly what it was.
13:09Ricky, are you ready?
13:10Ricky, are you ready?
13:11Yeah.
13:12Ready as I'll ever be.
13:13Come on, man.
13:14Take your drink.
13:15Let's go.
13:17They call it a thruple, don't they?
13:18We are looking for love.
13:19Yeah.
13:20They're looking for something that's long-term.
13:21We've got a lot of love to give, so...
13:22We definitely have.
13:23It would be nice to sort of share it around.
13:24Hello.
13:25Hello.
13:26How are you?
13:27OK.
13:28How are you, OK?
13:29How are you good?
13:30I'm good.
13:31I'm good.
13:32I'm good.
13:33I'm good.
13:34So we bonded over Shrek.
13:35So we bonded over Shrek, didn't we?
13:36Typical parents.
13:37That's exactly what it was.
13:38Ricky, are you ready?
13:39Yeah.
13:40Ready as I'll ever be.
13:41Come on, man.
13:43Take your drink.
13:44Let's go.
13:45They call it a thruple, don't they?
13:46We are looking for love.
13:47Yeah.
13:48We are looking for something that's long-term.
13:50We've got a lot of love to give, so...
13:51How are you, okay?
13:52I'm good.
13:53Going good?
13:54Going good.
13:54This is Ricky.
13:56Nice to meet you.
13:57Let me give you a hug.
13:58I'm Emily.
13:59Nice to meet you.
14:00Nice to meet you.
14:01Should I get another chair?
14:02Yes, please.
14:03You can have mine.
14:05It'd be nice to share the moments with another person.
14:08To find somebody that likes to cuddle up on the couch and just to kind of fit in.
14:12It's like a missing piece to a jigsaw.
14:16How are you?
14:17I'm good.
14:18How are you?
14:18How are you feeling?
14:19A bit more nervous.
14:21Well, actually, no, not as nervous as I was.
14:24Yeah.
14:25It's very good.
14:26I think I was very nervous.
14:29I think I might get another drink in a minute.
14:31Yeah, nice.
14:33I don't think it would work if the other person didn't fancy both of us.
14:38Because obviously that would be upsetting for one of us, wouldn't it?
14:42A lot of it's communication.
14:44Yeah.
14:44It has to be there.
14:46It's really important.
14:46It has to be paramount.
14:47Otherwise, there's just no point.
14:49There's no point.
14:51Google, we've been having a nice time.
14:53Yeah.
14:53We're, like, settled into the date now and you're just, like, fresh.
14:57Hi, girl.
14:58Hey.
14:59We're like, yeah, yeah.
15:00We both, sort of, tend to, sort of, like the same women.
15:05Yeah.
15:06I think you'd be able to tell if we like them.
15:08Definitely look at each other and smile, wouldn't we?
15:10Mm-hmm.
15:11You both get on, like, house on fire, it seems.
15:18It's amazing.
15:19You were very nervous to tell me about your situation.
15:23Yeah, so I said, so, I have a husband.
15:26And I was just, like, slang.
15:27You know what I mean?
15:29Like, so easy.
15:30Like, proper, like, couple goals, energy.
15:33You two.
15:35I have to say, since I got married, I'm on cloud nine.
15:39Oh, I love hearing that.
15:40You know, it was such a, such an amazing day.
15:43We were in Jamaica and it's the most ideal location in the world.
15:48It's so beautiful.
15:48Oh, my God, look at these.
15:51These are so amazing.
15:56Ghost cheese salad?
15:57Yes, thank you.
15:59Nourish bowl for gentlemen.
16:01Mayonnaise.
16:02Thank you so much.
16:03You're very welcome.
16:03Enjoy.
16:09You are a bit of a pretty boy.
16:12Last year, I did a bit of Naked Butler.
16:16Um...
16:16What are you looking for?
16:19Are you looking for, like, a long-term relationship or are you...
16:21Yeah, 100%.
16:22I hate being single, I mean, like, I just don't enjoy it.
16:25So, what about you?
16:25I had a seven-year relationship.
16:27Seven-year relationship.
16:27Mm.
16:28So, how long ago was that?
16:29Two and a half years ago.
16:31I feel like I'd outgrown the relationship, um, and the town I was living in with him.
16:37Um, and I just needed to try something new.
16:40So, I'd moved to London two years ago.
16:42I kind of wanted to put myself in an uncomfortable position so I could grow as a person, which
16:49I feel like I have massively.
16:51Like, I wouldn't be doing this if I hadn't grown as a person.
16:54So, you sort of, like, ready, yeah, for something.
16:58Yeah, I guess I hit, like, 28 and I was like, mm, it would be nice to, you know, meet someone
17:02now.
17:02I, I have had enough alone time, but it's, it would be nice to have a relationship that
17:09is the one that I stay in forever.
17:15This is lovely.
17:16Nice one.
17:17I mean, the drink is really good, but you're good.
17:21You are as well.
17:22Oh, thanks.
17:23You're, like, the fittest guy I've ever gone on date with.
17:26Shut up.
17:26No, you actually are.
17:27No, I'm not.
17:28You 100% are.
17:29Thank you, that's very sweet.
17:31And you're also very good, I think.
17:37Are you excited for your first table of the day?
17:40Yeah, I'm confident I'm ready, yeah.
17:42And so it seems that we have talked before and laughed before, but who knows where or when
17:59I think it might be appropriate, that song, because meeting somebody for the first time.
18:06Meet Derek, 89 years young and ready to serenade his way into one lucky lady's heart.
18:14I like to sing when I go on cruises.
18:17Oh, and I won the singing contest at the end of the cruise.
18:22I don't feel my age, let's say 89.
18:28I feel 65.
18:31Or less.
18:37Nice to meet you.
18:39You're so young at heart.
18:41You're 20 going on 90.
18:42You're 90?
18:43In May.
18:44Wow.
18:45You look incredible.
18:48Shall I take your jacket?
18:49Please do.
18:49You dress very well.
18:53Do you travel a lot?
18:54I did a cruise in November.
18:57I go by myself now.
18:58You did not make any approaches to any of the ladies there?
19:01Oh, yes.
19:01Yeah, yeah.
19:02So, did it work?
19:03I had a nice lady from Honolulu and she's only 70 years of age.
19:07You are the king with the ladies.
19:09I don't know about that.
19:10Come with me, I'll take you to your table.
19:12You're the first to arrive.
19:12I'm old school, open doors, lift the chair away, take a ladies coat.
19:20There's guys, he knows how to play the ladies.
19:22Yeah, so I'm romantic.
19:25And I love to sing romantic socks.
19:28So what are you looking for?
19:29Somebody that's bubbly.
19:30Yeah.
19:31Outgoing.
19:32Yeah.
19:32I'd like to sing.
19:33You like to sing?
19:34I sing.
19:35Cool, yeah.
19:36What I'm looking for, I think she's got to be friendly, nicely dressed as I hope I would
19:42be for her, and can laugh, because I've got silly jokes.
19:46And if she's interested in music, that's half the battle.
19:51What song could your dream date sing to really win your heart?
19:56Lady.
19:58Lady.
20:00That's a nice song, isn't it?
20:02Could music be the food of love for 77-year-old June?
20:09I can even tolerate Dolly Parton.
20:16Looking so elegant.
20:18Oh, thank you very much.
20:19Perfect.
20:21Shall I take your coat, maybe?
20:22Yes, that would be lovely.
20:23I prefer an older man.
20:25If somebody's got a nice beard and they've looked after themselves and they've got groomed
20:30hair, but at the end of the day, isn't it the person themselves?
20:35Hello.
20:36Hello, Jean.
20:37I'm June.
20:38Okay, Jean.
20:39I'm Derek.
20:39Derek?
20:40Hello, Derek.
20:41Hello, Jean.
20:41Hello.
20:43This is a rather super restaurant, isn't it?
20:45Lovely.
20:46Yeah.
20:46I've only been to Bath a couple of times and it was only just...
20:50It's the most romantic city in Britain.
20:52Isn't it wonderful?
20:54When you meet in Bath, that's it.
20:56You look very nice, let me tell you.
20:58Beautiful top.
21:00You look rather lovely yourself.
21:08Cheers.
21:08Nice to meet you.
21:10It's bad luck otherwise.
21:11I don't know what I thought.
21:13Mm-mm.
21:14Wow, that is strong.
21:15It's like the connection.
21:21I'm really scared about my hair setting on fire.
21:23Although we already are on fire because our date is so there.
21:26Yeah.
21:26Don't, don't try to kiss me.
21:29Okay.
21:31We only met like two hours ago.
21:33Oh, fair enough.
21:33I actually like fancied the pants off her when she'd come in.
21:39I was like, I'm done.
21:40Absolute rocket, to be honest.
21:42I am a little bit nervous to what the outcome's going to be.
21:46I've never met someone that I just sort of click with quite, like, just quite easy to get on with.
21:51So, do you want to see each other again?
22:03Like, I'd definitely be lucky to see you again.
22:06Would you?
22:08Yeah.
22:08Really?
22:09Yeah.
22:09I know, obviously, I hid it quite well, but...
22:12Yeah, you really hid it really well.
22:14Yeah.
22:15The attempt kisses was, you know...
22:17Yeah, I'd like to see you again.
22:20Yeah?
22:21Yeah.
22:21We can see each other again.
22:23Nice one.
22:23If we can plan something even better than this.
22:26Yeah, yeah.
22:26I have the bill?
22:28Are you splitting it?
22:29I'll get it, I'll get it.
22:30You bring out, like, a side to me that I, like, could just have fun in, like...
22:36Good.
22:39Nice.
22:39I don't know.
22:41I don't feel as if I've got to try and be anything different around you.
22:45I just feel as if I could be myself.
22:47You can give me a kiss and cheek.
22:51I've never watched in this cheek.
22:58You know, we hold my hand.
23:00Oh, my God, we hold my hand.
23:01It's so sweet.
23:08I was watching television and they said they advertised...
23:12Oh, I don't know if you've ever seen this naked attraction.
23:15Oh, yeah.
23:16I watched it and I was gobsmacked.
23:18I mean...
23:18I was like...
23:20Yeah.
23:21And I was tempted to say to my children,
23:25I'm going on a television programme.
23:27And I was waiting for them to say what programme.
23:29And I was going to say naked attraction.
23:31Oh, brilliant.
23:33Well, I am just going to pop to the toilet,
23:35so I'll be back in a moment, OK?
23:36Of course.
23:40So.
23:43I have a date in who is in a polyamorous relationship.
23:48Right, OK.
23:49What's that mean?
23:49Sorry.
23:50It means that they are happy to date more than one person.
23:55That is nuts.
23:56You know what?
23:57I take my hat off to them, fair play.
24:00What's your experience with dating so far, like, together?
24:05We've tried dating apps.
24:07Mm-hmm.
24:08They all seem to be wanting one thing.
24:10Mm-hmm.
24:11And that's not really what we're after.
24:12Yeah.
24:13So you're looking for more, like, an emotional connection.
24:16Yeah.
24:16I'd definitely say emotional connection rather than physical.
24:19Yeah.
24:19I prefer being able to sort of cuddle on the sofa, watch a film.
24:25I think a lot of the time, like, even for me, it's very much just like, hey, like, dip in.
24:30Thanks for that.
24:31See you later.
24:31See you later.
24:31And now that couple is going to go and spoon on the couch and watch true crime.
24:36And it's like, I don't want to spoon on my true crime, do you know what I mean?
24:39And it's like, you do sort of miss that emotional bit, I guess.
24:45When I was in my late 20s, I discovered this thing, polyamory, non-monogamy.
24:50And I was like, oh, this is actually a thing?
24:54Like, so I started exploring it from there, really.
24:56And now, yeah, I think that's just how I identify and I probably wouldn't look back.
25:01You seem like a really strong couple.
25:07I'd like to think so.
25:08You have to be a strong couple if you are going to sort of dip your toes in.
25:14I would like to be swept off my feet, to be honest.
25:18I think that's another misconception about non-monogamy as well,
25:21is that we're not really into the big dream of, like, being swept off our feet and stuff.
25:26We definitely are.
25:27Like, I'm such a romantic.
25:29I love all that.
25:29Part of it for me is, like, witnessing that love and that connection between the primary couple.
25:36People will be like, are you not threatened that that couple will never love you the same way that they love each other?
25:43And it's like, no, like, it's connection is connection.
25:47I'm like...
25:47It's a process.
25:48Yeah.
25:49It's so true.
25:53I really need a weeb.
25:55I will venture to the loo.
25:57How are you getting on?
26:04Good, I think.
26:05Are you OK?
26:06Yeah, it's just an absolute.
26:07What do you think?
26:09Yeah.
26:10Do you think she's, like, into you?
26:13What's this one here?
26:26This is, um, this is the infinity sign.
26:28Um, I was...
26:29I was on holidays and I was really drunk and I thought that was a good idea, so...
26:33That's not a good idea.
26:35I thought some really random tattoos.
26:37They're wicked.
26:37These are all women from films that I'm obsessed with.
26:41So you've got Regina George.
26:43You know Regina George, right?
26:43Oh, yes, I do.
26:44I love that.
26:44And then this is, like, Penny Lane from Almost Famous.
26:48Just strong, independent women, babes.
26:50You know what I mean?
26:51I love that.
26:51What is this little badge I can see?
27:01I bought this jacket in my lane with my wife and it's got a little bit of character to it.
27:07It's double-breasted, you know.
27:08So, um, I used to go on cruises with my wife and, of course, she passed away so I didn't go cruising.
27:16How long ago did you lose your wife?
27:19Three years ago this month.
27:21Yeah.
27:24I sent my wife Valentine's cards every year we were married for 65 years.
27:31So I miss her terribly.
27:33Still think of her every day.
27:34Still say goodnight to her, say good morning to her.
27:37Her picture's there.
27:39All in all, she may be a better person.
27:43Yeah.
27:46Yep.
27:49I miss that.
27:51But as my friends and family say, you've got to move on, Derek.
27:58You've got to live your life.
27:59You know, after losing my wife and my kids said, Dad, you know, at an age now where you've got to, you know, the last five years, you've got to start to live your own life.
28:10I know my wife would love me to be with somebody and my daughter says to me, there's a nice lady out there, Dad, looking for you, as well as you're looking for her.
28:21And I think it was wonderful.
28:22And I think it was wonderful.
28:23A little pressy for you.
28:25Oh, really?
28:26Oh, I couldn't find any chocolate.
28:29No, thank you very much.
28:31It's lucky that they got this far.
28:33I might have eaten them if I hadn't have had a full English this morning.
28:35Yes.
28:36My train is at 6.14.
28:44What's the time now?
28:45I'm caught on 6.
28:46I ain't making that.
28:48No, you're not.
28:48And it's the last one.
28:50Yeah.
28:50I guess I'm in the bathroom another night, guys, so I might as well get comfy.
28:56Is she, like, your type?
28:58She's definitely...
28:59You did well.
29:00She is definitely our type.
29:01Our type, yeah.
29:02So, what happens if she comes in now and says that she wants to see you and not me?
29:13Yeah, erm...
29:14Right, you ready?
29:15That's good.
29:16Let's give it a go.
29:19It's all coming up.
29:20What's that, man?
29:21What?
29:26How are you feeling?
29:27I'm good.
29:28Good.
29:29You guys okay?
29:29Yeah, good.
29:30Yeah.
29:32So, would you like to see each other again?
29:37Absolutely.
29:39Love to see you again.
29:40I think you're lovely.
29:40And I think, kind of, we had a really good connection, I thought.
29:44So, I'd love to.
29:45Yeah.
29:46I agree.
29:47I would love to see you guys again.
29:48I'd love to see you again.
29:49The relief.
29:50No, yeah, I agree.
29:52Like, I think we had, like, such a good vibe.
29:54Like, us, and then, obviously, when you joined us, it's obviously that, oh, God, is this going to derail the whole day?
30:00Yeah, yeah.
30:01Like, but it didn't at all.
30:02Like, we all had a great vibe together.
30:05I'm glad you joined us.
30:06Yes.
30:07That was a nice little plot twist.
30:09Yeah, just a bit.
30:10So, our Fridays are probably going to look a little bit different from now on.
30:15Yeah.
30:15What do you reckon?
30:16Yeah, we've just got a new couch, haven't we?
30:18It's big enough.
30:18Is it big enough?
30:19Yeah.
30:19Yeah.
30:19I'm so lucky.
30:31That's a new one.
30:34Let's go and have a drink.
30:35Come on, let's do it.
30:37Let's do it.
30:37I owe you guys a few drinks, so let's do that.
30:40What should we do?
30:41Shots.
30:41Shots.
30:46Oh, hello.
30:46I have a little wedding gift.
30:49Oh, look at that.
30:50Federico and fruitcake.
30:51That's wonderful.
30:52I don't want them to see it yet.
30:53Look at that.
30:53I get first signature.
30:55Get first signature, because you're the late man.
30:57Right, oh.
31:03Are you a hot dad?
31:10Me daughter sees a few of her friends think I'm a dill.
31:12Probably more guilt these days.
31:13I'm kicking on.
31:15Wanting to prove there's more to him than meets the eye
31:17is singled out of three, Mike.
31:20Everyone thinks I'm a real lad.
31:22People just see tattoos and probably just think you're a bit of a rogue
31:25and a bit of a player and stuff.
31:27I'm a massive softie.
31:30I'll find a joke in anything.
31:33Life's for living and laughing, and that's what I'm here to do.
31:35How are you?
31:38My man crush, that is, right there.
31:40Nice to meet you, Mike.
31:41Are you all right?
31:42I am.
31:42So what's your type?
31:43What are you looking for?
31:44I ain't really got a type.
31:45You can't even explain what it is.
31:46It's like I never liked small people.
31:48That was my biggest turnoff, was small people.
31:50And I married a woman who was five foot tall, do you know what I mean?
31:52Well, in bed, we're all the same size.
31:55I wouldn't know.
31:56That's been that long, Fred.
31:57I forgot, but apparently so.
31:59I just hope I'm not too much sometimes.
32:02You can take us home if you want, Fred.
32:03I've always said you want my man crush.
32:05Come on, let's go.
32:07If I'm in a situation where people don't know,
32:08it'll be quite awkward because I'm one shut up.
32:10A beer, a Guinness.
32:12I'll try a cocktail, Fred.
32:13Are you paying, Fred?
32:15I'll say stupid things because I don't know how to cope
32:18in a particular situation.
32:20And then that can make us come across as a bit of a twat.
32:22If I can get on and have a laugh, what more, do you know what I mean?
32:25I never go out these days, so as long as I, like, have a laugh and that, do you know what I mean?
32:29But if I can meet somebody who can make us smile,
32:32take us some of that loneliness away.
32:34That's the nice thing about it, because you don't know who it is, do you know what I mean?
32:37It's, like, exciting in it, do you know what I mean?
32:38I love a fit best mate.
32:40That's what I'd love, do you know what I mean?
32:42But whatever that can happen, I don't know.
32:45Hopefully it's worth it.
32:46Hopefully it was worth the wait.
32:49Oh, is my hair okay?
32:52Hi!
32:54Hoping to cut out dating bad boys is hairdresser Carly.
33:00I started seeing a guy last year.
33:02It was going great.
33:03And then I found out he was actually going to prison.
33:06I know I need to stay away from them.
33:08So I'm looking for someone that's family-orientated and just somebody settled in life.
33:13I laugh a lot.
33:16So somebody has got to make me laugh, and that's a big, big thing for me.
33:21How are you?
33:24I'm fine, thank you.
33:25You're looking amazing.
33:27What kind of man are you looking for?
33:29Tall, dark, handsome would be nice.
33:31Any other particularity that you like?
33:34A bit of facial hair's nice.
33:35Yes.
33:36Tattoos, because I've got quite a few tattoos myself.
33:38So are you ready to meet him?
33:39I'm ready.
33:40Come with me.
33:40I'm ready.
33:43Oi, oi, Fred.
33:44How are you?
33:45Hi, how are you?
33:46Yeah, I'm very well.
33:47Yeah, do you have a good time?
33:48Yeah, you look lovely.
33:50Oh, you're cold, isn't it?
33:51It's freezing.
33:55Here you go.
33:55Thank you very much, Fred.
33:56You've done very well.
33:57First time I've been punching in a long time, this is Fred.
34:01Oh, my goodness.
34:04What's your poison?
34:06Cocktail-wise, I love a porn star martini.
34:09How much is it?
34:10I'm just checking the price before I order it.
34:12Fuck that.
34:13I'm a single dad.
34:14I call a porn star.
34:15Get a heart beside her.
34:17You'll get used to me.
34:18I just sat down.
34:19I don't care.
34:20I like someone that can make laugh.
34:22Well, you're in for a street tonight, then.
34:25Not much to look at, but I'm funny as fuck.
34:30How are you with your technology?
34:32Rubbish.
34:33I'm a dinosaur.
34:34Oh, thank goodness.
34:35And this is what I'm finding.
34:37How do you meet somebody?
34:39Very difficult.
34:41And my children thought, if I go on to one of these websites, well, that was an awful nightmare.
34:49I mean, I feel like a dinosaur, to be quite honest with you.
34:51Yeah, totally.
34:52I am.
34:52When I go around and I'm going to the ballet or I'm going somewhere, I seem to be the only one on my own.
35:02Everybody's there with their partners, their family, whatever.
35:06And I prefer to be with somebody.
35:09That's what I'm missing, somebody to do these things with.
35:15I would enjoy a nice cuddle and just holding hands with somebody and somebody to be there genuinely for me.
35:29Yeah.
35:29I mean, I've been known to take videos of my own feet, for goodness sake.
35:35Have I?
35:37I'm glad.
35:38Yeah.
35:39Many times.
35:40Filming out the back.
35:40How on earth did I do that?
35:42Both as bad as each other.
35:44Cheers.
35:44It's nice to meet somebody.
35:46Good health.
35:46Oh, I'm so happy about that.
35:50Let's go.
35:50Let's do it.
35:51Let's do it.
35:51Let's do it.
35:51Just write whatever you want.
35:58Beautiful.
36:02We do look very sun-kissed.
36:04First compliment I've had, you look sun-kissed, don't you?
36:07Yeah, you're not one for the compliments, I've noticed.
36:10Fucking hell, fishing and fishing, you're not good compliment.
36:14Being the saddest of times, I've managed to get through them all through the power of laughter.
36:18And it's been massive, like, and especially through recent situations in my life.
36:22So, you've got kids then?
36:24Aye, yeah.
36:24Yeah.
36:24I've got three kids, all the same, man.
36:26Really?
36:27Yeah, yeah, yeah.
36:27Oh, my goodness.
36:28I was like, mate, I don't know how to tell you or whatever, but my wife's dead, like.
36:33Oh, okay.
36:34Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
36:36Yeah, but I've been with her nearly 22 years.
36:38Yeah.
36:38Oh, my gosh.
36:39Always, yeah, yeah, yeah.
36:40Jodie had cancer of the esophagus.
36:44Give her a prognosis of three to six months to live, like.
36:48She was the purest and nicest person.
36:52The best, you know, the best man in the world, like.
36:57She didn't deserve it, like.
36:58Really didn't deserve it.
37:02As soon as my wife died, like, I was so lonely.
37:05I just didn't know what to do with myself, like.
37:06I'd just be sitting there in the dark every night.
37:08The kids would come down and say, Dad, what are you doing?
37:09I'd say, oh, just chilling.
37:11Yeah.
37:12And life had to go on.
37:14I couldn't crumble, like, my children needed this more than ever.
37:17It's your past and then.
37:19Yeah.
37:20So now I'm a single dad with three kids, like.
37:22I bet that's really hard.
37:23Being a parent anyway is hard.
37:25It's hard.
37:25But doing it on your own.
37:26Yeah, it is on your own.
37:28I've raised them 24-7, like.
37:30I'm not after a new mum for my children.
37:32I'm never, ever going to meet another Julie who never...
37:34If I get 1% of what I had with her again in the future,
37:37I'll be a happy man.
37:38You've got very nice arties.
37:43Oh, thank you.
37:43Yeah, I've got very nice arties.
37:45Very blue.
37:45I'm glad you noticed, like, you know what I mean?
37:47See, there's a compliment.
37:48It is.
37:49Very nice.
37:49You've got very nice tattoos.
37:53And very nice teeth.
37:56Everything I've listed aren't yours, though.
37:58It's a little box.
38:00Look, babe.
38:01I am a valet.
38:02Yeah, I mean.
38:03Proper valet.
38:04No, but I like that.
38:05But if I'm laughing and flirting, it means I like it.
38:07Yeah, I mean.
38:08No, I'm winning them at the moment.
38:10Oh, 100%.
38:10Yeah, 100%.
38:11That's all right.
38:16I've not been going to the gym recently because of injury.
38:20But, yeah, I do the row machine.
38:23Yeah, and how much can you press?
38:24The ski.
38:25240 pounds, your own weight.
38:27I do what they call the sumo squats because they're supposed to be good for you.
38:32Where you have your legs wide and your feet open.
38:35Oh.
38:36And you come down.
38:37Oh.
38:37The sumo squats.
38:38Oh, why?
38:38You don't have to be fat and 23-stown to do that.
38:43You're supposed to give you a magnificent bottom.
38:45I've always wanted a bottom.
38:46Can you get up and walk over there?
38:48No.
38:48You're not going to float your bottom to me.
38:57I really don't know what to wear today.
39:03I thought, shall I wear bright?
39:05Shall I wear something with a low cleavage?
39:08Oh, you're de go.
39:10Yeah, you should have done.
39:12No, I'm kidding.
39:16Thank you, my dear.
39:17Merci beaucoup.
39:18Don't hear it, mademoiselle.
39:19How old are you?
39:2543.
39:2643.
39:26You're meant to go, what?
39:2843?
39:29You're winding me up.
39:30Because I'm, like, 36 this year, so I'm still going to be closer.
39:32Wow, were you?
39:32I forgot, like, 18.
39:34See, I was better, more enthusiastic.
39:37How long were you with your ex for, like?
39:3912 years.
39:41What happened?
39:42He was seeing someone behind my back.
39:44Shit.
39:44It's one of them, and it happens.
39:45Yeah, it does, but...
39:47Um, because 12 years is a long time.
39:49It fucking is, yeah, yeah.
39:52I didn't realise what a heartbreak was, um, until we broke up.
39:57When somebody has broken your trust,
39:59it is really hard to put your trust into somebody else again,
40:02but I'm really happy with how my life is right now.
40:05I'm just missing that certain someone to share it with.
40:11Are you a good clerk?
40:12No.
40:13At least you're honest.
40:14I never had to do it.
40:15My wife was old school.
40:17Like, I'm not saying you should do that,
40:19and I'm not saying that's all right where you know what I mean,
40:20but my wife was, like, literally, like, a 19-20s housewife.
40:23She used to do them all, like, that.
40:24But that's the part.
40:24I think that's the way it should be.
40:25Just because...
40:26Are you old school?
40:27Yeah, 100%.
40:28Like, when me and my ex were together,
40:30every night, tea would be, like, waiting.
40:32Do you know what I mean?
40:32But that's the way...
40:33Would you cut the lawns?
40:35Oh, I love cutting lawns.
40:36Fred, but for a marriage.
40:38Come on.
40:39Would you take the bins out on a Monday morning?
40:41Oh, yeah.
40:42I've always done it.
40:42Two seconds.
40:42I'm just going to ring the kids.
40:43She cuts the lawns and takes the bins out.
40:47Yeah, so I'll bring her home.
40:49Ta-ra.
40:51Oh, my goodness.
40:52You do make me laugh.
40:57Will you go away?
40:59I can't go away.
41:00You're too handsome and too tall.
41:03I wanted to speak to you, Mr and Mrs Flirt.
41:05I was wondering, do you fancy a little dance?
41:09I don't dance at school.
41:11She doesn't dance.
41:12I am.
41:13But she sings.
41:17You make me feel so young.
41:21You make me feel that spring has spun.
41:25And every time I see you,
41:29you're such a happy individual.
41:33I want to go and bounce a moon just like a toy balloon.
41:42You and I are just like a couple of tots running across the meadow,
41:54picking up lots of forget-me-nots.
41:57Because you make me feel so young.
42:02We certainly gelled.
42:03I think she's a winner as far as I'm concerned.
42:08I certainly fancied the lady.
42:09Yeah.
42:11Because you make me feel so young.
42:17Is that good now?
42:18Wow.
42:22Oh, that's super cute.
42:24Wow, wow, wow.
42:31Thanks for meeting you.
42:35Would you like to see each other again?
42:38On the count of three.
42:41One.
42:41I can't count.
42:43One.
42:45Two.
42:45Three.
42:46Yes.
42:46Yes.
42:51Everything about this lady is amazing.
42:55I'm very lucky to have met you.
42:57Cheers.
42:57But we laughed as we laugh for now and talk, didn't it?
43:04No.
43:05Brilliant, yeah.
43:07Right, let's go and have a nice coffee.
43:09A nice coffee.
43:09It's just lovely.
43:15And how about you teaching me to do a little boogie?
43:18Why not?
43:23Well, that drink's lovely, man.
43:27Oh, that is good.
43:28Really?
43:28I prefer that mine to yours.
43:30Yeah, I prefer yours to mine as well.
43:33I make...
43:34Oh, you bastard.
43:37Whoopsie.
43:40Just to turn you on to the room inside me thighs.
43:42It was a strategic move, honestly.
43:43It was the plan.
43:44It wasn't me being a sweat.
43:46All part of the plan.
43:48I thought she was beautiful, eh?
43:49Lovely girl.
43:50I would definitely give her a swipe, right?
43:51Yeah.
43:52Yeah.
43:53Why can't I give too much of you, eh?
43:54Like, in case you mugged me off next, but...
43:56No, no, honestly, no, like, splits.
44:00Oh, stop being noble, I'll get it.
44:02I've got me family allowance today, it's all right.
44:08Hello, you are.
44:14Would you like to see each other again?
44:17Yeah, yeah.
44:18Definitely.
44:19Oh, bloody hell, definitely.
44:19Well, keen, yeah.
44:22Yeah, definitely.
44:23Yeah, she doesn't make her sound nice.
44:24Really friendly, really nice, and she ain't too bad on the iris.
44:30I'll be a gentleman and get the door, don't you?
44:32Definitely a bit of me.
44:33Oh, bloody hell.
44:35Definitely, yeah.
44:36I've always said if someone can make me laugh, then.
44:39That's it.
44:39Ugly fucker.
44:41You can't have that in.
44:42Ugly man.
44:43It would make us laugh.
44:45Nice, isn't it?
44:47Ooh.
44:47No, but your one-liners are good.
44:53Jokes are good.
44:54Yeah.
44:55No, I was like, I don't think you're laughing.
44:56Fuck.
45:09Hey.
45:10Hey.
45:11How are you?
45:12Oh, no, how are you, Mrs. Cyriac?
45:14I'm good, thank you.
45:16Lovely to see you.
45:17Lovely to see you, too.
45:21I think that's a successful first day.
45:23I would say yes.
45:25Yeah, agreed.
45:26Guys, we got you a little wedding gift.
45:49This is brilliant.
45:52Wow.
45:53And we've all signed to the back as well, so you've got a little wedding.
45:57Oh, brilliant.
46:02Jerec, you have a wonderful voice, but I'm sure you've been told that many times.
46:07I don't know about this, but it's nice to hear you say so.
46:12Thank you, guys.
46:14You've got a lot of sunshine into my life.
46:18You filled me with happiness I never knew.
46:22Cheers.
46:22Oh, thank you.
46:24Thank you, guys.
46:26And no one, no one can take the place that you will.
46:30It just made me laugh.
46:31And I love that.
46:33What does that?
46:33I laugh the whole way through.
46:35Yeah, we thought we'd been kicked out of the restaurant for laughing, didn't we?
46:37I might be a bit late tomorrow morning.
46:54Love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, from now on.
47:11From now on
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