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#eastenders

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00:00Okay, well, we've been up early to redecorate, so, er, we'll all just forget the epic meltdown.
00:22Keep calm, carry on.
00:24Yesterday was just a blip on what is going to be a lovely festive family day.
00:28Right, Billy and Honey are still coming and you boys are going to be there.
00:32God, this is a joke.
00:34Why don't you ever see Father Christmas in hospital?
00:37Because he's got private elf care.
00:39That's a joke.
00:41And this is half Christmas.
00:43And it's mandatory.
00:45I wouldn't be half Christmas if we weren't papering over cracks.
00:49I wouldn't miss it for the world, Mum.
00:57Right.
00:59Paddy's party.
01:01Which one of these makes my eyes pop the most?
01:03Listen, I was thinking maybe we should give Julie a call, you know, having another familiar face around the place might help knock stuff like yesterday on the head.
01:12I made my decision and we made a pact.
01:16I think it's got to be this one.
01:18But don't need any.
01:19Not bad for a last minute brainstorm, eh?
01:31Paddy.
01:32No one calls him Paddy.
01:33Well, maybe you should.
01:35It's very endearing.
01:36And do not worry, there is no whiskey or creme liqueur in that.
01:40Only rum and bitters.
01:41I've done my research because I wanted to give him a little bit of peacock panache for his birthday.
01:46Now, I know Yolandi shook on 300, but I think another 80 should cover it.
01:54As in when you've got it, Ovs.
01:55Um, Mum.
01:56Hmm.
01:57Yolandi and Kim wanted this to be a classy event.
02:00Yeah.
02:00I don't think umbrella straws and rum punch is what they were after.
02:04Well, no one does class like us and there's more surprises to come.
02:08So tell Kim I've got it covered, yeah?
02:10OK.
02:11I am going to go get some coffees.
02:13I think we're going to need them.
02:14Oh, lovely.
02:16Mum, are you doing that thing where you throw yourself into something because something else is worrying you?
02:21And that something being George?
02:25George?
02:26Is ancient history.
02:28This is our pub.
02:31And getting it back on its feet has absolutely nothing to do with him.
02:35And he can whistle up a gum tree if he wants a slice out of it.
02:38Listen.
02:39Why don't you go to your meeting?
02:41In fact, have the day off.
02:43Look, I'm sorry I left you with all the hard work.
02:46But Mother is back now.
02:52Oh, where is Mother?
02:53Now, it's not just Raymond and Pearl that you're looking at.
02:55You've got cats, kids, too.
02:58So you tell your mates that they are the priority, right?
03:03Listen, no messing about.
03:04Don't worry, Mum.
03:05My boy's a good boy.
03:07So that was Howie.
03:09We've got Carter Caribbean Coop on our hands.
03:12I need to get over there.
03:13No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
03:13There's no time for that.
03:15What?
03:15We need Patrick to think that it's a fancy lunch.
03:18Remember?
03:19Not 12 rounds we've left at Laney.
03:21So let's fight more pearly whites.
03:23Hey, look at the wonderful girls.
03:28Are you all ready for a good time?
03:30All the time.
03:31Let's go.
03:33Go on, babe.
03:36The call centre's rent's gone up and the mini-mart's overreads are a fortune, too.
03:40Well, I'm sure Ravi's got the same over at Wolf of the East.
03:43It's, um, brisking the world, ain't it?
03:45And anyway, who are we to question the Palisar's empire, eh?
03:48Talking of questioning, have you seen these invoices from Mac and Sons?
03:54I'm presuming they're for work on some of the properties, but they are charging a bomb.
03:59Do you feel we should check with Sookie?
04:01Um, don't worry, I'll sort it.
04:08Less quarter day, yeah?
04:09Does Patrick even like cricket?
04:11He better.
04:12I mean, Graham's probably set a wicket up outside of Vic by now.
04:16Well, you're a trustman, Taylor.
04:17Are you coming to Patrick's party later?
04:20Um, maybe I'll...
04:22We'll see.
04:29So, have you already told her about us being official, or is that a way of showing us to all who knows?
04:34She's just jealous that you've stolen me away, that's all.
04:36I will tell her at the party, and all you need to do is pass the boyfriend.
04:45Right, who's for a top-up?
04:47Don't be shy.
04:48Yeah, for sure.
04:50Billy, don't fill yourself up on those.
04:53You'll spoil your lunch.
04:55Well, we didn't have pigs in blankets for Christmas, did we?
04:58Not in here, no.
04:59Oh, there's my baby.
05:02Oh, you're getting in the spirit, aren't you, darling?
05:07Be calm and carry on, right?
05:11Oh, I'll get it.
05:12All right, then.
05:13I'm going to top up these pigs in blankets.
05:15Seem to be running low.
05:27It's all right.
05:27What the hell's he doing here?
05:30Well, I invited him.
05:32Half Christmas is about family time.
05:35And he is family.
05:37Right?
05:37Brad, are you sure about this?
05:49It's just, I really don't think palm trees and limbo sort of scream, I see.
05:54It's a party, darling.
05:55Your mum asked for help.
05:57And you two have done nothing but poke holes in us, so pipe down.
06:00All right.
06:00Okay.
06:01Hey, what do you think?
06:03Hey.
06:03Hi.
06:04Yay.
06:05Oh, there he is, the birthday boy.
06:07What do I see here?
06:09Surprise.
06:12Classy lunch.
06:13I should have known.
06:14Well, you know, we thought you, you, you know, deserves something, uh, special.
06:20And very, very, classy.
06:23Yeah, well, my wife-to-be and the girls all know what I like.
06:28Yay!
06:30Come on, look.
06:34Mission accomplished.
06:35Yes.
06:39Is that you reporting?
06:41You know Chelsea's done a playlist, yeah?
06:43Yeah, of course, darling, but I added a few extra bits.
06:46Nothing's as classy like Ali, can I?
06:52Who invited him?
06:53Oh, well, they're good mates, aren't they?
06:57Sorry.
06:57No, no.
07:04He needs to go.
07:05Now.
07:06Like I told you, I was invited.
07:08Yeah, well, you are family.
07:10Oh, you think this is funny, do you?
07:13Doing this to your brother?
07:16Doing what?
07:17Making him face the truth.
07:19Making us all face it.
07:21This ain't out of spite, Mum, it's for his own good.
07:23For his own good?
07:24Look at him.
07:26I'm gonna go.
07:27Maybe we should go.
07:28Oh, sit down.
07:29Right, this is a family occasion.
07:32Okay, and he ain't family.
07:33Teddy.
07:35Teddy.
07:37Get him out now.
07:46Listen, mate.
07:47I'm sorry, I would never have done this to you.
07:50I just thought...
07:50I don't know what I thought.
07:54The hell, mate.
07:55What are you doing?
07:59Listen.
08:01I ain't here to score points, play games, whatever.
08:04I'm here for you.
08:05If you ever need me, you know to call.
08:09See you later, mate.
08:10Are you all right, Mum?
08:14It's fine.
08:16We're all fine.
08:18Right.
08:19Who's up for charades?
08:21Me.
08:21Yes!
08:21I can't post this.
08:4280 quid.
08:43They're charging us an extra 80 quid for cultural aggravation.
08:46That's what they're going to say on the comments.
08:48It's appropriation.
08:49Well, it's aggravation for me.
08:50Can you just relax?
08:52I quite like this, you know.
08:54This punch is pretty good, to be fair.
08:56It's supposed to be a classy party.
08:58You know?
08:59A drum over the rocks.
09:01Civilised chit-chat.
09:03Not limbo and dull boy's blue lagoon.
09:05He's having a good time.
09:07I mean, we both know that deep down,
09:09Carnival gets classy in your book.
09:12Well, just forget what some idiot says online,
09:14and enjoy your city.
09:17There's something else, you know.
09:19You know what?
09:21I say, if you can't beat them,
09:23you'll have to dip them out, innit?
09:24Innit.
09:24Okay, here we go.
09:26Here we go.
09:27Here we go.
09:31Do I need to count the jugs when you're gone?
09:33I mean, you're only here to price up what you're going to steal from me, right?
09:36I'm here for Patrick.
09:38Not well.
09:39Well, you're going to get one if you don't clear off.
09:42I'm sorry I lost my temper.
09:47I'm 58 years old.
09:48This place was my library.
09:49What do you want me to do?
09:50I don't care what you do.
09:51We signed a postmark.
09:53And if you were half the man I thought you were,
09:57you wouldn't be here cap in hand for my money.
10:02Yeah.
10:03And if you were half the woman I thought you were,
10:06we'd still be together.
10:07Overproof.
10:15I ain't drinking this.
10:17Mean evil.
10:18All right, shoot yourselves.
10:19It does the trick.
10:20How long is that film going to last?
10:22I don't know.
10:22Until I put the next one on?
10:23Obviously, Ricky's dark dust,
10:25so there's plenty more to go around,
10:26so let's drink up.
10:27Well, this is tragic.
10:29Get out before I throw you out.
10:30I come with a peace offering.
10:32What's all you can do with it?
10:36Look, guys.
10:37I've been an idiot, all right?
10:40I know there's probably nothing I can do or say
10:42to make up for it,
10:44but for what it's worth,
10:46I'm sorry, anyway.
10:50We can stop your sorries.
10:53But I will take that.
10:55Stay out my way, yeah?
10:57Where's that bottle of vodka you got, is it?
10:59I just walked past Patrick's, too,
11:01so I reckon I could charm us a job or two off the lane.
11:03Dad, don't bother.
11:04We've got enough.
11:04Nobody's drinking that.
11:08It's a good idea.
11:09Oh, leave it to me.
11:10No, no, look.
11:12It's my family, dude.
11:13I'll sort it.
11:14It's nice to see Nigel having fun, isn't it?
11:32Yeah, he's really bounced back, hasn't he?
11:34Carol wants to make a cool Julian for some help,
11:36but, well, Nigel won't, I bet.
11:39Well, I just hope it was a blip, you know.
11:41It's all about distractions, isn't it?
11:42Yeah, I think it's really good, eh,
11:45you've been taking care of Nigel.
11:47But don't forget to look after yourself, normally.
11:51And Raymond's been missing you, too.
11:54Cheers.
12:02No bloodshed yet, then.
12:04Oh, for now.
12:05I've texted Mum, she's on her way over.
12:08Oh, no, here we go.
12:11That's more fun on the way.
12:12She hates me because of Keanu.
12:15And now Felix is going to tell her we're official.
12:19Do you really like him?
12:21Yeah.
12:24Well, then you'd better make sure that she likes you.
12:26because the last thing that we need
12:29is the past coming back to haunt us.
12:42OK.
12:43Go on.
12:44Said you were going to sort it.
12:46Sort it.
12:47Wait.
12:49Wait.
12:54You all right?
12:54Sorry to hear about you and George.
12:57If I was 20 years old, I didn't know.
13:00You still wouldn't stand a chance.
13:05Look.
13:06Come on, Elaine.
13:08I'm 17 sooner.
13:10You know me.
13:11You know the family.
13:13I'll ask each of this.
13:15It isn't going to hurt anyone, is it?
13:17We're celebrating Patrick,
13:18and my dad's over there.
13:20He said he's cool with it.
13:21Yeah, all right.
13:27One glass each, but that's all.
13:29Yeah?
13:29And then go and enjoy yourselves.
13:32Because that's what I intend to do.
13:34Cool.
13:37Phil.
13:50Peter Rabbit.
13:52Oh, Peter Rabbit too.
13:53Oh, if you're not going to play properly,
13:55then don't play at all.
13:56You've caused enough trouble today as it is.
14:01Pretty woman.
14:03No.
14:03Come on, Barn.
14:04Get involved.
14:06The devil wears Prada.
14:12Where's Prada?
14:13Yeah.
14:14Oh, no, not that you're the devil.
14:17It's just...
14:18Barn, where are you going?
14:19Barn?
14:21Barn?
14:21Oh, this is more me.
14:30It's cheap, Rooka.
14:31Well done, Denz.
14:32Fair play, mate.
14:33That was all you.
14:34It's your idea, though.
14:35Right.
14:36Well, me and you,
14:37we're sticking with the proper stuff.
14:38You're not only mixing our drinks, do you?
14:39Yes.
14:39Cheers.
14:40The devil's finished!
14:41It was rubbish, by the way.
14:44All right, well, I'll put another one on.
14:45You chose it.
14:46Oh, proper lords.
14:47Do you guys want the console on?
14:48Yeah?
14:49I'll put the console on.
14:49All right.
14:51Are you going to put some music on or what?
14:54Yeah, all right.
14:55Denz, you got a speaker?
14:56Uh, check around, Nicky.
14:58Stay on.
14:58It's Patrick's party, Mum.
15:01If he wants to have a drink with George, that is his choice.
15:04Yeah, and it's your choice to come back and get busy.
15:07When I told you to have a day off.
15:09I am fine.
15:11Look, I know you're angry.
15:12All right, but it's only money.
15:14George is trying to start a new chapter the same as you.
15:17But Johnny texts me because he's worried about you, Mum.
15:21And so am I.
15:23Maybe if you calm down and lay off the drink a bit,
15:26you might realise that you're better off with a clean break and no bad feeling.
15:30Because this is becoming a problem, Mum.
15:33This is our pub, and I am entitled to have a drink.
15:37My only problem is keeping George's hand out of my purse,
15:40and that is exactly what I'm going to do.
15:42Look, I know we weren't exactly subtle,
15:45but we just wanted to tell you that we're going to give it a proper go.
15:48Thank you, officially.
15:49And you are my cousin and my best mate,
15:51so, uh,
15:52all your approval's all I need.
15:56Right.
15:57On that note, I need a top-up.
15:59And now I'll leave you to give him the once-over here.
16:08So,
16:09it's going well, then,
16:11the panacea stuff.
16:16OK.
16:18I know you don't like me,
16:20and I understand.
16:21But I really like Felix.
16:25And he loves you, so...
16:27So, can we just try and put everything in the past?
16:32Yeah, no, you're right.
16:34No, why shouldn't I be happy about you being with my cousin and your family
16:37while I'm all on my own?
16:41Your mum killed my brother,
16:44and you helped her get away with it.
16:46It's not the past for me, Johnny.
16:48It's my life.
16:51It's my life.
16:58Had to get out of there meself, bum.
17:01Your mum is one glass of Buck's fizz away
17:04from strangling your brother with them lights.
17:12I'm sorry, mate.
17:14You didn't deserve that.
17:16Your brother's a prat with a point to make,
17:18and in this world, there ain't much worse.
17:21He did it to you, too.
17:25Ain't you angry?
17:28Well, I'd be a lot angrier
17:29if I didn't think he had a point.
17:32Now, when we found out you were a boy,
17:37I remember thinking, why, they're all sussed.
17:42Nudy drill.
17:44Bit of football.
17:45Clip round the ear every now and then.
17:47Worked for Harry.
17:49Thought that's how it was done, you know?
17:50And then you came along.
17:55And you were different.
18:00Well, you liked books for a start
18:02and hated anything with a ball that weren't Pokemon.
18:05You were cautious, clever, kind.
18:14And you used to give me a hug before you went to bed.
18:18And I couldn't work you out.
18:23But I loved every second of it, mate.
18:26Every second.
18:30I've taken more hidings in my life
18:34than I'd like to admit.
18:35But finding out about this, well...
18:41Nothing's hurt me more.
18:46Nothing.
18:49But the truth is...
18:51nothing's changed for me.
18:55I look at you now and I still feel the same.
18:59The same as I felt when I held you in my arms
19:02as a baby.
19:06You're mine, Bart.
19:08You're my son.
19:10And I am proud to be your dad.
19:12And nothing's gonna change that.
19:18Your mum...
19:20she's embarrassed.
19:22She's taken it out on Zach.
19:26But for me...
19:27he's the unlucky one.
19:29Cos he's the one that's not had you in his life.
19:31And if he cares enough
19:36to want to know you,
19:39then I love you enough
19:41to put my ego aside
19:44and let him in your life, mate.
19:49If that's what you want.
19:50I wanted to ignore it.
20:03But we can't, can we?
20:05This ain't his fault.
20:07It's not ours, either.
20:09I love you, Dad.
20:10I don't need him.
20:15Pushing him away ain't fair, is it?
20:18What he's doing is
20:19pushing us further from each other, too.
20:24You're the smartest person I know, Bart.
20:28So I know you'll make the right call.
20:32For all of us.
20:33I want my clunkies.
20:48That's a shout-out.
20:49Are you all right, man?
20:51Are you good?
20:52I'm fine, I'm fine.
20:53You don't look good.
20:54No, you don't.
20:56Do you want some water?
20:57No, I don't want some water.
21:00Guys, where's the other jug?
21:03I should be checking for zip-tyres and vans all up.
21:13We don't do gifts at half-Christmas, but thank you.
21:18I know these are book vouchers,
21:20but I think this place sells board games as well.
21:23Might get Mum a new one for next year.
21:25I think today put her off Gerard's for good.
21:28Yes, mate, I'm sorry.
21:30No, it's OK.
21:31I'm sorry, too.
21:34I mean, Harry did kidnap you,
21:36so I'm not really sure why you'd trust him.
21:38But still, I'm sorry.
21:40It's more hope than expectation, mate.
21:43Story of my life.
21:47Look, I know this is weird,
21:49but maybe it doesn't have to be this weird, right?
21:53Yeah.
22:00I don't need a dad.
22:02I've got one.
22:04I could always do with more friends,
22:05cos I'm not exactly Mr. Popular around here.
22:09You know?
22:10Even if you are in your mid-thirties and share my DNA.
22:12So, maybe we could start there?
22:25I'd really like that, mate.
22:26I told him not to drink it.
22:30I can't believe they did the whole jug.
22:32OK.
22:32Look, I need water.
22:33I need water.
22:34Yeah, good.
22:36Look, Raymond, you're OK, mate, yeah?
22:38I just need you to drink this and lay down.
22:39Come on.
22:40You're all right, mate, yeah?
22:40Come on.
22:41I feel sick.
22:43Denzel, we need to call someone.
22:43No, no, no, no.
22:45We don't need to call anybody.
22:46They're going to be fine.
22:46I will sort it out.
22:49Can someone get him some water?
22:51Sorry, Bert.
22:53Sorry, Bert.
22:58All right, all right.
22:59I want to thank all you for coming to me surprise party.
23:03You know, I had no idea at all, you know?
23:07Man, I want to thank me beautiful wife-to-be
23:11and me girls and them, you know,
23:13for organising this surprise.
23:16You're welcome.
23:18OK, OK.
23:19So why don't we all raise a glass, yeah?
23:23To Patrick!
23:27And to real men, unlike George over here,
23:31who would like me to maintain his lifestyle
23:34without his second name.
23:36Go on.
23:37No, no, no.
23:37Everyone loves George, don't they?
23:40But in the meantime, he's got his hand in my purse.
23:42You wouldn't get Patrick doing that or Phil
23:44or any man with any decency.
23:48Oh, calm down.
23:50Hey, Patrick, got your cake?
23:52She's drunk.
23:53And she's the one who cheated.
23:55It's always the ones you least expect.
23:58Oh, yeah.
24:00Like you weren't in and out of your old rose bush
24:02every chance you got.
24:04I'm as sober as a judge.
24:07But I now see people for who they really are.
24:11So cheers, everyone.
24:13Miss, Miss Raymond and the twins,
24:15they need an ambulance now.
24:17They've been drinking the punch.
24:18What?
24:18Come on, come on.
24:24So, he definitely failed the best friend.
24:27Boyfriend checked them.
24:28I'm sorry, you're all right?
24:37Look, I know that I've been spending
24:39a lot of time with him recently.
24:41I promise I will make time for you too.
24:45Because official or not,
24:46when you've got me,
24:48you're not alone.
24:51OK?
24:54OK.
24:54Come here.
25:02I love you.
25:04I love you.
25:04I love you.
25:14Right, where are they?
25:17Move.
25:19OK.
25:20I said move!
25:22Come here, darling.
25:23You OK?
25:25Baby?
25:26Baby?
25:27Paul, you all right?
25:28Yeah.
25:28You sure?
25:30You're all going to be fine.
25:32OK?
25:35You all are.
25:43Oh, there you are.
25:45You've got it out of your system, then.
25:48You know, if you're hungry,
25:49there's plenty of food left over.
25:50Well, bar the pigs in blankets.
25:52We'll have to get more in next year for Billy.
25:55Maybe we can give Monopoly a spin too, eh?
25:59OK.
25:59Well, um, I'm going to head upstairs now.
26:02Let this play out.
26:03Today was supposed to be a nice family day.
26:12You know, to remember the good times.
26:14And he's ruined it.
26:15I mean, you're an idiot.
26:17But the front of him, turning up here like that...
26:19It ain't his fault.
26:21And it ain't Harry's either.
26:22It's yours.
26:24And we went and saw Zach.
26:26Barney is going to have him in his life,
26:28whether you like it or not.
26:30And the way I see it,
26:32he needs more good people in his life.
26:35Merry half-Christmas, Mum.
26:45How could you be so stupid?
26:47I let a 16-year-old have one cocktail
26:49at a family do
26:50that he told me his father had okayed.
26:53How is I to know he's going to steal a couple of jugs
26:55and feed them to kids?
26:56Listen to yourself.
26:58You believed him without talking to Howie.
27:01You have put them kids in hospital
27:02and have a licence at risk.
27:03Chelsea said the paramedics told her
27:05they're going to be fine.
27:06But don't worry, Donny.
27:06You make me the villain.
27:07Because you'd rather be here
27:09with your pal George, wouldn't you?
27:10What?
27:11I'm your mum.
27:12And this is our pub.
27:13Yeah, and you're acting like a spoilt brat.
27:14Mum, calm down.
27:15No, no.
27:16All right, she needs to hear it.
27:18Yeah.
27:19Yeah, your marriage is over.
27:20And yeah, it's sad.
27:21But that doesn't give you the right
27:23to act like a teenager
27:24who's had her heart broken.
27:26I can't do this, all right?
27:28I can hardly look after myself.
27:29I can't look after you
27:31and this pub as well.
27:32Let me have a little think.
27:34I might have looked after you
27:35a few times, yeah?
27:36You really want to start
27:37tallying up who's made more mistakes?
27:39I have a long way to go
27:40before I catch up with you.
27:42I don't need you looking after me
27:44or this pub.
27:45I can look after both
27:46on my own.
27:48Be the landlords.
27:50We've been informed
27:50that a minor in Walford general
27:52reserved alcohol
27:52from these premises.
27:54We're here to investigate.
27:54Well done, Mother.
27:57We're here to see you next time.
27:58Bye.
27:59Bye.
28:00Bye.
28:01Bye.
28:02Bye.
28:03Bye.
28:03Bye.
28:04Bye.
28:04Bye.
28:05Bye.