- 4 days ago
Good Girls Gone Wild
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#reelshort
#dramabox
#short
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Tele : t.me/khmovies_com
#shortfilm
#reelshort
#dramabox
#short
#shortdrama
#kalostv
#fyp
#film
#shortmax
#tv
#movie
#movies
#reelshorts
Tele : t.me/khmovies_com
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:00Oh, bad.
00:00:30Hello?
00:00:31Cheryl, we have to talk about our birthday plans.
00:00:34I mean, it's only two days away,
00:00:35and we still haven't decided the perfect way to celebrate.
00:00:38So I was thinking maybe we could all take a trip to...
00:00:42Me too.
00:00:43Um, I meant to tell you before, but I wanted to be sure.
00:00:46Um, I think I'm going to spend my birthday with Jake.
00:00:49Uh, I'm going to lose my virginity to him.
00:00:52You know, I want to surprise him.
00:00:54What? But you can't.
00:00:56I mean, I thought we were going to wait until marriage.
00:00:59Besides, you can't do that to us.
00:01:01You can't break tradition that way.
00:01:04This is bad.
00:01:06You know, I'm going to tell Lexi.
00:01:07She's going to be very unhappy about this.
00:01:16Come on, Lexi.
00:01:18So girls, what are we going to do for our birthday?
00:01:33Sue, we have plenty of time to figure something out.
00:01:38But this is the big 1-8.
00:01:40I mean, every year since our mom's met in the hospital,
00:01:42we've done something new and special,
00:01:44but this has to be newer and more special.
00:01:47So what's something we've never done before?
00:01:49Mushrooms?
00:01:51No, not like that.
00:01:52Like something nice.
00:01:54Like maybe a trip.
00:01:56Like a mushroom trip?
00:01:57No.
00:01:59Sorry, Sue.
00:02:00I have a date.
00:02:02So do I.
00:02:04Sorry, Sue.
00:02:05Don't worry, Sue.
00:02:06We'll figure it out.
00:02:19Oh, flowers.
00:02:20Are these from you?
00:02:21Yeah, sure.
00:02:22Here you go.
00:02:24No card, but I thought I saw one.
00:02:27I didn't know how to put my feelings into words.
00:02:30I guess you still make me nervous.
00:02:35Oh, Jake.
00:02:40Maybe I should come in and hang out for a minute.
00:02:43No, Jake.
00:02:44Not yet.
00:02:45When we do it, I want it to be really special.
00:02:47The best night of my life.
00:02:49It will be.
00:02:50I promise.
00:02:51It will always be amazing.
00:02:53With you and me.
00:02:54Together.
00:03:03Jake, no.
00:03:04I have to go.
00:03:05I have to work on my art project.
00:03:07You know, I thought art was going to be a really easy elective,
00:03:10but I guess I should have taken more math.
00:03:14So you're going to come to my birthday, okay?
00:03:16This Saturday?
00:03:17Of course.
00:03:21Thanks.
00:03:22Okay.
00:03:23Bye.
00:03:24Nothing.
00:03:25Nothing.
00:03:26Nothing.
00:03:27Oh, baby.
00:03:28You're so hot.
00:03:29I'm going to do you so good.
00:03:30Oh, yeah, baby.
00:03:31Yeah.
00:03:32What was your name again?
00:03:33Rod.
00:03:34Sex guy.
00:03:35Lexi is so upset, she's speechless.
00:03:36You're right, I bet.
00:03:40Cheryl's losing her virginity on Saturday?
00:03:41Oh, no.
00:03:42Does not compute.
00:03:43Want to talk in person ASAP.
00:03:44Oh, huh.
00:03:45Oh, huh.
00:03:46Hi.
00:03:47Hi.
00:03:48Hi.
00:03:49I'm.
00:03:50She's so upset, she's speechless.
00:03:53You're right, I bet.
00:04:00Cheryl's losing her virginity on Saturday?
00:04:04Oh, no.
00:04:05Does not compute.
00:04:07Want to talk in person ASAP.
00:04:12Oh, huh. Hi.
00:04:16When did you get home?
00:04:17So is it true?
00:04:18Yes, it is.
00:04:20It's just, it's the right time, and Jake's the right man.
00:04:24I mean, he's handsome and smart and wealthy,
00:04:29and he has a really bright future ahead of him.
00:04:31So I just think it's the right time.
00:04:34Lexi, tell her.
00:04:35Losing our virginity is one of those milestones
00:04:37we should all face together.
00:04:39On our birthday, yes, but not on this birthday.
00:04:41Like, maybe on our 23rd birthday,
00:04:43or maybe even, like, our 28th.
00:04:47Maybe.
00:04:48Maybe.
00:04:49Listen, guys.
00:04:50I'm, I know it's tradition, but...
00:04:53I'm sorry.
00:04:57I know it's tradition, but...
00:04:59I'm sorry.
00:05:05But Cheryl, Sue is right.
00:05:08We do always do something special on our birthday.
00:05:11Does Jake really have such a tiny little needle dip?
00:05:14It's not Jake.
00:05:16It's the male ideal.
00:05:18Like, a Greek god or Sue's dad.
00:05:22Right.
00:05:23Yeah, I guess you're right.
00:05:25I mean, it kind of sucks.
00:05:27I'm not really an artist.
00:05:28Girls, can you just stop changing the subject?
00:05:30The point is, we should all lose our virginities together
00:05:33on the same day.
00:05:34And I'm just not ready yet.
00:05:36I'm waiting for a sign.
00:05:37And then I'll know it's right.
00:05:39Look, I can go either way.
00:05:41I mean, I'm fine with just 69, 79, anal.
00:05:46I don't feel any rush to actually do the deed.
00:05:49Besides, I know it'll never live up to my rabbit anyway.
00:05:52But if you want to do it this year, then maybe we all should.
00:05:57You know, it could be like our big 18th birthday thing.
00:06:04Where are you going at 6.30 in the morning?
00:06:07To church to pray for you.
00:06:09Wanna be first in line.
00:06:11I'm getting some sleep.
00:06:13Yeah, me too.
00:06:16Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.
00:06:25It has been four days since my last confession.
00:06:27I accused myself of the following sins.
00:06:29Okay, so I'm really embarrassed to talk about this,
00:06:34but it's about sex.
00:06:37I mean, not me.
00:06:41I've never gone past second base with a guy.
00:06:43I've never even seen a guy's...
00:06:47Well, there was that one time I took the pants off my Ken doll.
00:06:50But I was dressing him up as Jesus,
00:06:52and I wanted to see his thing.
00:06:54But there was nothing there.
00:06:55Okay, so it's about my friends.
00:07:00My best friends.
00:07:02They're gonna do something really bad this weekend.
00:07:04Okay.
00:07:05Third base.
00:07:07What?
00:07:08No.
00:07:09Like, sex.
00:07:10Like, intercourse?
00:07:12With boys, they barely even know.
00:07:13I mean, they really need us intervention.
00:07:15If you know what I mean.
00:07:16All the way.
00:07:17Go all the way.
00:07:19What are you?
00:07:21What's it?
00:07:23Ah!
00:07:24How could you do so?
00:07:27You're a bad, bad person.
00:07:32What?
00:07:37Yes!
00:07:38Yes!
00:07:39Run!
00:07:40Run!
00:07:41Home route!
00:07:43Ah!
00:07:44Damn it!
00:07:46You fucking Yankees.
00:07:50Sorry.
00:07:54Sue, it is 1 p.m.
00:08:15Would you have a little consideration?
00:08:17I'm trying to sleep.
00:08:19Jeez, can you guys please keep it down?
00:08:21I have an announcement to make.
00:08:24I want to do it.
00:08:26Do you hear me?
00:08:27I want to do it.
00:08:30This weekend.
00:08:31On our birthday.
00:08:33Do what?
00:08:35It.
00:08:36Screw.
00:08:37Screwing.
00:08:38Boning.
00:08:39Making the beast with two backs.
00:08:40You know.
00:08:41Shagging.
00:08:42Fucking.
00:08:44You do.
00:08:46But what about all your religious stuff?
00:08:48And what about your sign from heaven?
00:08:50Oh, I got a sign.
00:08:51At church.
00:08:52Really?
00:08:54Well.
00:08:55Okay, great.
00:08:57We're all in then.
00:08:59So we'll have a big pool party and we'll do it there.
00:09:02Right?
00:09:04Right.
00:09:06I'll start making the shopping list.
00:09:07Hey, Frank.
00:09:08Hi, Sue.
00:09:09Guys, we didn't invite Frank to the party.
00:09:10I don't know.
00:09:11Do you think he'd even have fun?
00:09:12Yeah.
00:09:13He's blind.
00:09:14Blind people can do everything regular people can do.
00:09:15Wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:09:16Wait, wait, wait.
00:09:17Hey.
00:09:18Hey.
00:09:19Um, I was wondering.
00:09:20We're throwing this party tomorrow night.
00:09:21It's for our birthdays.
00:09:22Do you want to come?
00:09:23Do you think he can see up my shorts?
00:09:24Yeah.
00:09:25Do you think he can see up my shorts?
00:09:26Yeah.
00:09:27Hey, Frank.
00:09:28Hey, Frank.
00:09:29Hi, Sue.
00:09:30Hey, Frank.
00:09:31Hey, Frank.
00:09:32Hey.
00:09:33Um, I was wondering.
00:09:34We're throwing this party tomorrow night.
00:09:35It's for our birthdays.
00:09:36Do you want to come?
00:09:37Do you think he can see up my shorts?
00:09:42Well, my house looks done.
00:09:56Tomorrow's a big day.
00:09:58We finally turn 18.
00:10:00And finally lose our virginity.
00:10:02Well, we better get our beady sleep,
00:10:04because the party starts tomorrow at 2.
00:10:06So, OK, we know who Cheryl's going to do it with.
00:10:08Jake.
00:10:09And I'll probably do that guy Rod.
00:10:11But, Sue, who are you going to pick?
00:10:13To pop your chair.
00:10:14It's easy.
00:10:15I've known for the past six years,
00:10:17ever since catechism.
00:10:20What the fuck is catechism?
00:10:22I think it's a baby panda wrapped in peanut butter.
00:10:24Yeah.
00:10:28My soulmate.
00:10:34Chris?
00:10:36Sue, you, um, might want to think about picking a backup.
00:10:42I mean...
00:10:43What?
00:10:44No.
00:10:45Chris is perfect.
00:10:46He played Jesus in Jesus Christ Superstar last year at camp.
00:10:48Plus, his name's Chris.
00:10:49It's a sign.
00:10:50Sue, the only sign is that Chris has a major case of gay face.
00:10:55What?
00:10:56He does not.
00:10:57Anyway, there's no such thing as gay face.
00:10:59He looks just like Justin Bieber.
00:11:01With a little bit of Zac Efron and just a hint of Ryan Seacrest.
00:11:05Who the fuck's Ryan Seacrest?
00:11:07Look, Chris is my soulmate.
00:11:10OK, well, sweet dreams.
00:11:12Mm-hmm.
00:11:13See you in the morning.
00:11:22I knew it would happen someday.
00:11:23I just didn't expect it to happen so soon.
00:11:25I knew it would happen so soon.
00:11:35You're so perfect.
00:12:05I knew that's what I look like.
00:12:35Too bad no one could ever compare to you.
00:12:54Tomorrow's the day.
00:13:05Oh, my gosh.
00:13:26They're coming.
00:13:28Lexi, Cheryl, hurry.
00:13:34Ew.
00:13:35Why?
00:13:36It's for Jake to unwrap me.
00:13:37It's going to be really sexy.
00:13:38It's unministered.
00:13:39You're going to die of asphyxiation.
00:13:41It's going to be really sexy.
00:13:43It's stupid.
00:13:44Just screw him.
00:13:45That's what he wants.
00:13:46That's what all guys want.
00:13:47Who hurt you as a child?
00:13:49Oh, Christ.
00:13:50I don't have your mouth, too.
00:13:52Anyway, what guys want is someone who's sexy, not someone they can just have sex with.
00:13:57You're an idiot.
00:13:58A very smooth, plastic-wrapped idiot.
00:14:02Guys, seriously, come on, hurry up.
00:14:05Oh, what a cool bracelet.
00:14:11I love it.
00:14:13Um...
00:14:14You should put that down, though, because it's like...
00:14:16It's very fragile.
00:14:17Yeah.
00:14:18Okay.
00:14:19Set it down.
00:14:20Hurry up.
00:14:21Okay.
00:14:22Those were your anal beads, right?
00:14:24Yeah.
00:14:25Okay.
00:14:26Let's go.
00:14:43Oh, this part of the hat!
00:14:44Oh, Jesus.
00:14:45Whoa!
00:14:46Oh, we're going to have some fun.
00:14:47Oh, Attack of the Wet t-shirts.
00:14:48Nice!
00:14:49Ha, ha, ha, ha!
00:14:50Let's go.
00:14:51Let's go.
00:14:52Let's go.
00:14:53Let's go.
00:14:54Let's go.
00:14:55Let's go.
00:14:56Let's go.
00:14:57Let's go.
00:14:58Let's go.
00:14:59Let's go.
00:15:00Let's go.
00:15:01Let's go.
00:15:02Happy birthday, Lex.
00:15:04Oh, Joanna.
00:15:05We said no gifts.
00:15:08That is lip poison to plump your lips, but be careful it stings.
00:15:12And the other one is edible miscellular.
00:15:15Oh, how did you know?
00:15:17I mean, I'm going to use both of these tonight.
00:15:19Let's go.
00:15:24Busters.
00:15:25Such a cutie.
00:15:27Please don't touch my service time.
00:15:29All right.
00:15:30Sorry.
00:15:31Are you okay now?
00:15:32Yeah, I'm fine.
00:15:34Okay.
00:15:35We'll see you later.
00:15:36I can't believe you haven't heard of it.
00:15:38This is crazy.
00:15:39Oh.
00:15:40Jake.
00:15:41Hi.
00:15:42Happy birthday.
00:15:43Happy birthday.
00:15:44Oh, you didn't have to give me anything.
00:15:47What?
00:15:48You want a beer?
00:15:49No.
00:15:50Oh, hon.
00:15:51Come here.
00:15:52I have your present here.
00:15:53I'll give it to you later.
00:15:54The time's right.
00:15:55You didn't have to give me anything.
00:15:56And I have a present for you that I want you to unwrap later.
00:15:57Hey, bro.
00:15:58We need you to settle this bed over here real quick.
00:15:59We'll bet.
00:16:00All right.
00:16:01All right.
00:16:02All right.
00:16:03This is my man right here.
00:16:04Hey.
00:16:05How are you doing?
00:16:06Hey.
00:16:07Hey.
00:16:08How are you doing?
00:16:09Hey.
00:16:10Check it out.
00:16:11Deremy?
00:16:12Deremy?
00:16:13Deremy?
00:16:15Woo.
00:16:16Woo.
00:16:17Woo.
00:16:18Hey.
00:16:19Hey.
00:16:20Hey, bro.
00:16:21We need you to settle this bed over here real quick.
00:16:23A little bit.
00:16:24All right.
00:16:25Hey.
00:16:26Hey.
00:16:27Hey.
00:16:28How are you doing?
00:16:29Hey.
00:16:30Hey.
00:16:32Check it out.
00:16:36Deremy?
00:16:37Woo.
00:16:38Woo.
00:16:39Look at the ducky.
00:16:40Look at the ducky.
00:16:42Woo.
00:16:43Woo.
00:16:44Woo.
00:16:45Woo.
00:16:46Woo.
00:16:47Woo.
00:16:48Woo.
00:16:49Woo.
00:16:50Woo.
00:16:51Woo.
00:16:52Woo.
00:16:53Woo.
00:16:54Woo.
00:16:55Woo.
00:16:56Oh, dude.
00:16:57Look at those.
00:16:58Are those real?
00:16:59I don't...
00:17:00Have you guys seen Cheryl?
00:17:01Hey.
00:17:02Ah.
00:17:03Dude.
00:17:04Move.
00:17:05Oh, lame.
00:17:06Oh.
00:17:07All right.
00:17:08Okay.
00:17:09I'll see you guys later.
00:17:10Go do some pushups or something.
00:17:11Aw, the booze.
00:17:1220 bucks says by the end of the day, I will be motorboating those titties.
00:17:13They're fake anyways.
00:17:14Who cares?
00:17:15Okay.
00:17:16Oh, dude, dude.
00:17:17I'm blind, you fucking asshole.
00:17:21I'm blind.
00:17:22You fucking asshole.
00:17:23You asshole.
00:17:27Sue, no, it's your birthday.
00:17:28Here, let me.
00:17:29Joanna, no.
00:17:30Just go enjoy the party.
00:17:32What?
00:17:34Open.
00:17:37Hey, do my lips look any plumper?
00:17:39I put this stuff on, but I can't really feel anything yet.
00:17:43Have you guys seen Jake?
00:17:44I haven't seen him anywhere.
00:17:45It just, like, disappeared.
00:17:53Are these real?
00:17:59Of course they are.
00:18:02How come I haven't met you before?
00:18:04I don't know.
00:18:05Maybe he's gonna be around.
00:18:06Ryan, have you seen Jake?
00:18:08Um, I think he's around or something.
00:18:10Maybe upstairs.
00:18:11I don't know.
00:18:13Maybe you want to go get my birthday present.
00:18:15That's probably where you went.
00:18:21Liquid Courage?
00:18:22Yeah.
00:18:23Mm-hmm.
00:18:24Atta girl.
00:18:28Vodka, cranberry?
00:18:29It's really simple.
00:18:32Well, I guess it's now or never.
00:18:33I gotta go meet Rob.
00:18:35Sue?
00:18:36Are you okay?
00:18:38Sue?
00:18:39Relax.
00:18:41They're just lies.
00:18:42Okay, nothing to be scared of.
00:18:43Seriously.
00:18:44It's gonna be fine.
00:18:45Is Chris here?
00:18:46I'm gonna do it.
00:18:47I'm gonna do it.
00:18:48I'm gonna do it.
00:18:49I'm gonna do this.
00:18:50Good luck.
00:18:51Good luck.
00:18:52Hey.
00:18:53You can do this.
00:18:54Just act like a slut.
00:18:55Just act like a slut.
00:18:56Just pretend you're lexical.
00:18:57I'm gonna do this.
00:18:58I'm gonna do it.
00:18:59I'm gonna do this.
00:19:01wow it's even worse in person isn't it no he does not have gate face i'm gonna prove it to you
00:19:11i'm gonna do it i'm gonna do this good luck
00:19:14hey you can do this just act like a slut
00:19:20just pretend you're lexi
00:19:31yeah my favorite chapter is sodom and war chris hi can i talk to you
00:19:39uh in private
00:19:42oh hey lexi hey lexi
00:19:57what chris you're so sexy ever since you played jesus at camp i've just
00:20:06i've known that we were meant to be together
00:20:08and i really want to
00:20:11oh what are you doing is that wrong sue what's gotten into you nothing i'm sorry i don't know
00:20:20how to do this sue sue sue sue sue i understand these urges and you know i like you too really
00:20:34you do i do i really do i like you too really you do i do i really do it's just
00:20:45i've devoted a lot of my life to one certain man right lexi said you were jesus oh that man of course
00:20:57what did you think oh nothing so we can still do this then oh sue sue
00:21:05you know for me when i think about that man who died for our sins when i think about him up there on that cross so helpless yet so muscular with his strong thighs crossed over each other so delicately beneath that ragged loincloth
00:21:35so sweaty under that hot hot sun i just feel such compassion i think about those things too so you understand why i can't do this not really i just find it too hard it is to give in to carnal pleasure when he sacrificed so much for us so
00:21:57he sacrificed so much for us so
00:22:10we're gonna go out there right and then we're gonna tell you three months
00:22:14hey hi whoa
00:22:17can you see him jake?
00:22:18uh no no
00:22:20all right
00:22:22okay all right focus focus focus
00:22:26oh there he is
00:22:33oh he got me the puppy that i wanted
00:22:38how could he?
00:22:51who do you?
00:22:52sue?
00:22:53what happened?
00:22:54did you guys do it?
00:22:58sue?
00:22:59he doesn't want me
00:23:00because he's gay
00:23:02no he's not
00:23:03he just really loves jesus
00:23:05oh come on sue
00:23:06the only reason you even liked him is because you knew he was never a real possibility for you?
00:23:13look the only way you're gonna find out what kind of man you really want is to know what kind of woman you really are deep inside
00:23:21what?
00:23:22what?
00:23:23come with me
00:23:24where?
00:23:25to meet your dark side
00:23:28leave
00:23:29come with them
00:23:30out
00:23:33everyone out
00:23:34Everyone out!
00:23:44Sue, it's time for you and your vagina to meet face to face.
00:23:59I really can't. I really don't think I can do this.
00:24:03I'm not letting you out until you look.
00:24:08I'm not letting you out until you look.
00:24:13Sue?
00:24:15Can you see it?
00:24:17Sue.
00:24:21I'm almost... I'm almost there.
00:24:24It's there.
00:24:29What?
00:24:31What? Sue, what happened? What did you see?
00:24:34A raccoon?
00:24:36What?
00:24:38You overshot it. Aim the mirror further up.
00:24:39I can't. Please don't make me do that again.
00:24:49Okay, fine. Fine. I didn't want to do this, but you leave me no choice.
00:24:54What?
00:24:56You really need an orgasm.
00:24:58Honestly, I don't know how you expected to ever have sex with someone else
00:25:01when you've never even had it with yourself.
00:25:04This really has to be your first step.
00:25:06Les, I'm waiting.
00:25:08Coming.
00:25:09Sue, my black vibrator is somewhere in the top drawer.
00:25:10Just find it and use it.
00:25:13Wait, what does the black vibrator look like?
00:25:16It's black. It vibrates.
00:25:19Come on, Rod. Let's go to Sue's room.
00:25:22Don't come back until you have at least one orgasm.
00:25:25Don't come back until you have at least one orgasm.
00:25:37Hey, cutie! Cutie!
00:25:43Boozeye!
00:25:45Oh, yeah!
00:25:46Bang! Bang! Bang!
00:25:53Good boy. Straighten up.
00:25:55Good boy. Good boy.
00:25:58He knows over a hundred commands.
00:26:01I'm sorry. I can't see anything.
00:26:04That is not funny, Cheryl.
00:26:06What a bitch.
00:26:08Fortunately, when you're blind, you get used to things like that.
00:26:10Oh, shit.
00:26:38Oh, shit.
00:26:41What's wrong with this thing?
00:26:46Nice shot.
00:26:48Direct hit.
00:27:01Cheryl, what is wrong?
00:27:04Lexi, it's Jake.
00:27:05He was getting a blowjob by some pink-haired girl.
00:27:09For sure?
00:27:11I mean, I know I've been putting off having sex with him, so maybe, maybe it's my fault.
00:27:15That's no excuse. He's a dirtbag. How dare he?
00:27:18No, it's awful.
00:27:20I mean, I thought I was gonna marry him.
00:27:27It's a text. It's from him. I can't bear myself to read it.
00:27:30Okay.
00:27:32Uh, he's looking for you. He wants to give you your birthday gift.
00:27:36Oh, I can't face him. Um, I have to go. I'm going.
00:27:39No, you can't just leave.
00:27:41Well, I can't stay and just pretend like nothing happened. I mean, maybe I should confront him.
00:27:45No.
00:27:47He'll either deny it or admit and promise never to do it again.
00:27:50Either way, it's bullshit. I see only one option.
00:27:53I'm leaving.
00:27:55Revenge sex.
00:27:57Re- I mean, what? What does that even mean?
00:27:59It means you find a guy, you screw his brains out, and you let Jake catch you.
00:28:05Revenge sex.
00:28:07Re- I mean, what? What does that even mean?
00:28:08What? What does that even mean?
00:28:09It means you find a guy, you screw his brains out, and you let Jake catch you.
00:28:14But he- I mean, he doesn't even care. He doesn't even care about me. I mean, why would-
00:28:18He's just into other girls.
00:28:20Trust me, he'll care.
00:28:22Seriously, this is the worst thing you could do to him. To his ego.
00:28:26To screw someone else when you've never even had sex with him.
00:28:29Especially if it's with someone smarter, better looking, and with a bigger dick.
00:28:34No, I- I couldn't. Plus, I mean, there's- there's no one smarter and- and better looking.
00:28:40Eric! He's perfect!
00:28:43Eric Hall? Are you kidding?
00:28:45I mean, he wouldn't even be into me. He likes your type.
00:28:49Really? And what type is that?
00:28:51Spuddy.
00:28:53Yeah. Trust me, he's amazing. I fooled around with him once. He has this great tongue ring.
00:28:58Oh, no. I could never fool around with somebody you fooled around with.
00:29:01Okay, then. Fine. We will find someone else. Someone that I haven't.
00:29:06Fooled around.
00:29:10Okay, what does it matter that I fooled around with him? I mean, it's- you're not going to marry the guy.
00:29:15No, I just couldn't do it.
00:29:17Fine. If you want to live the rest of your life knowing that you had one chance to do the right thing,
00:29:21to make your boyfriend feel like a total, worthless piece of garbage and possibly even scar him with the rest of his existence,
00:29:27and you chose not to do it, go ahead. But honestly, I don't know how you'll be able to live with yourself.
00:29:33I don't know.
00:29:38But honestly, I don't know how you'll be able to live with yourself.
00:29:41I don't know.
00:29:43Trust me. It's going to work.
00:29:45I will intercept Jake and get him upstairs.
00:29:54Hi, Cheryl.
00:29:55Okay, enough to chat with her.
00:29:57Oh, no.
00:29:58Hello.
00:30:09Hey.
00:30:11Happy birthday.
00:30:13Thanks.
00:30:28Have you guys seen Jake?
00:30:41So...
00:30:43Happy birthday.
00:30:46Uh, do you know that most people think that the happy birthday song was from Britain?
00:30:51But it's actually from us. U.S.
00:30:53America?
00:30:56United States?
00:30:57I know where we live.
00:30:59Right.
00:31:00Of course.
00:31:04I know where we live.
00:31:05Right.
00:31:06Of course.
00:31:11Hey, Jesus, Erica. Are you going to make your move or not?
00:31:14Oh, you want me to move?
00:31:15Yeah, no. I can totally move. I just...
00:31:17No, you're fine.
00:31:28Jake!
00:31:33So, Eric, do you want to do it or not?
00:31:35Oh.
00:31:37I'm sorry. It? What, um...
00:31:40It. Like monkey boning and, like, pigs in a blanket. Get real nasty.
00:31:45Oh. Oh. Oh. You mean, like, uh...
00:31:51Right now?
00:31:52I mean, well, yeah. You know, the sooner the better.
00:31:56Yeah, sure. I mean, well, yeah, of course. Um, I just never realized that you...
00:32:01I mean...
00:32:04Whew. Uh...
00:32:06It's just...
00:32:08You're so...
00:32:11You're so beautiful.
00:32:12Okay. Um...
00:32:13Hmm?
00:32:14Uh, no Cassine.
00:32:17Right. Um, of course. Sorry.
00:32:23So, um...
00:32:25Do you want to unwrap me?
00:32:28Oh, wow. Uh, you're wrapped up like a Hot Pocket or a leftover macaroni and cheese.
00:32:34Now that you're left over, you're not.
00:32:36You're fresh.
00:32:40Now that you're left over, you're not.
00:32:42Yeah, uh, you're fresh.
00:32:44Organic.
00:32:46Yep.
00:32:48Uh, so the wrap.
00:32:49Right.
00:32:51Um...
00:32:53Where's the, uh...
00:32:54It's, uh, the end is...
00:32:55I just, like, right over here.
00:32:56Oh, oh, yeah, here it is.
00:32:57Yeah.
00:32:58That's where I see it.
00:32:59Um, let me just, uh...
00:33:01Ow. Ow. Ow.
00:33:02Oh, sorry. Sorry. Sorry. I, um...
00:33:05It's okay. Here.
00:33:06Do it again.
00:33:08Sorry, I, uh...
00:33:10I bite my nails, so it's a little difficult.
00:33:11You know what? Let me just lay on the bed.
00:33:15Okay.
00:33:20Uh, let me just see.
00:33:23Oh, here it is. I got it.
00:33:25All right. Just, um, pull it.
00:33:27Oh, let me just...
00:33:28Ah!
00:33:30Oh!
00:33:31Oh, jeez. Uh, Cheryl, are you...
00:33:34You okay?
00:33:35Help! Help!
00:33:36Uh...
00:33:38Hey, Cheryl, are you okay?
00:33:41Oh, jeez.
00:33:42Uh...
00:33:43Uh...
00:33:44Uh...
00:33:45Uh...
00:33:46Uh...
00:33:47Uh...
00:33:49Well, that was stupid.
00:33:50Uh...
00:33:52Yeah.
00:33:53Uh...
00:33:54Uh...
00:33:55Uh...
00:33:58How you doing tonight?
00:33:59I'm good.
00:34:00You having a good time?
00:34:01Yeah? You good?
00:34:02Jake!
00:34:03I think I saw Cheryl upstairs.
00:34:05What?
00:34:06I can't hear you!
00:34:08I need another beer.
00:34:10The chips are so damn salty.
00:34:12Jake!
00:34:13Up...stairs.
00:34:14Yeah.
00:34:15Hold on.
00:34:16I'll take a piss.
00:34:17How much beer?
00:34:18How much beer?
00:34:32Ah!
00:34:33Ah!
00:34:34Ah!
00:34:36Ah!
00:34:37Ah!
00:34:38Ah!
00:34:39Ah!
00:34:40Ah!
00:34:46Finally.
00:34:47I, uh...
00:34:49Let me just get the blinds.
00:34:50Oh!
00:34:51No, no, no!
00:34:52Um...
00:34:53Don't worry about it.
00:34:54What?
00:34:55I mean, I want us to be able to see each other.
00:34:59Oh.
00:35:01Well, okay.
00:35:02Okay.
00:35:16Okay.
00:35:17Okay.
00:35:18Mm-hmm.
00:35:19Okay.
00:35:20I don't know.
00:35:21I don't know.
00:35:22Okay.
00:35:23I don't know.
00:35:24I don't know.
00:35:25Come on.
00:35:26Okay.
00:35:27Okay.
00:35:28Okay.
00:35:29Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
00:35:30Um, don't worry about it.
00:35:31What?
00:35:32I mean, I want us to be able to see each other.
00:35:34Oh.
00:35:35Well, okay.
00:35:36Okay.
00:35:37Mmm.
00:35:38oh
00:36:04oh
00:36:08What are you doing?
00:36:20Uh, I think it's time, you know, to do it.
00:36:28Um, not yet.
00:36:29More foreplay.
00:36:30Huh?
00:36:30Oh.
00:36:31It's so good.
00:36:40Oh.
00:36:42Yep.
00:36:43Oh, my God.
00:36:45Jaw, jaw, jaw.
00:36:46What?
00:36:47What?
00:36:47Ah, ah, oh.
00:36:49Ah, dear.
00:36:51Lock jaw, lock jaw.
00:36:52Is that even a thing?
00:36:54I don't know.
00:36:57Ah.
00:36:58Are you okay?
00:36:59No, no, no, no, it's, uh, it's fine.
00:37:04I'm just, uh, embarrassed.
00:37:06It's probably TMJ or fracture or swollen.
00:37:13You sure you're okay?
00:37:15Yeah, yeah, I'm fine.
00:37:16Okay, great.
00:37:17Have fun.
00:37:17Oh.
00:37:23Now.
00:37:24Now, let's do it now.
00:37:25No, no, not yet.
00:37:26Not yet.
00:37:29I'm gonna come.
00:37:30I'm gonna come.
00:37:31Are you ready?
00:37:31No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:37:34No, no, no, no, not yet.
00:37:35Lexi!
00:37:36Lexi!
00:37:36Oh, shit.
00:37:38Oh.
00:37:41No, no, no, no, not yet.
00:37:42Lexi!
00:37:43Lexi!
00:37:44Oh, shit.
00:37:45Oh.
00:37:46No means no.
00:37:47Huh?
00:37:48Oh, I'm so sorry.
00:37:49I'm sorry.
00:37:50I'm sorry.
00:37:50It's been a really long time and I just, I haven't masturbated for anything.
00:37:54Uh-oh.
00:38:00Oh, hey, Jake.
00:38:01How you doing?
00:38:05How's it going?
00:38:06Good.
00:38:07Eric?
00:38:08Come.
00:38:09Eric, help me.
00:38:10I'm glad I can't see anything.
00:38:12Excuse me.
00:38:17Cheryl's in here.
00:38:17What's up, bro?
00:38:24What the fuck is...
00:38:25Hey, wait!
00:38:29Lexi, babe, I'm still waiting.
00:38:37Oh, I'm sorry.
00:38:38I can't see.
00:38:39I'm blind.
00:38:41Damn it.
00:38:43I'm going to say something to that bitch.
00:38:45Hey, you!
00:38:47You better stop making fun of the blind or I'm going to teach you a lesson.
00:38:53I'm so sorry.
00:38:55I'll never make fun of the blind again.
00:38:57Ah!
00:38:58Oh, man.
00:39:22No more water balloons.
00:39:23This party's ass.
00:39:27Yeah!
00:39:32This just isn't working.
00:39:35Nothing.
00:39:36What's the big deal about these vibrators anyway?
00:39:37I'm care of the man.
00:39:41The life sticks.
00:39:43Spark it up.
00:39:44All right.
00:39:45Yes!
00:39:45Yes!
00:39:48Oh, man!
00:39:49I love this game.
00:39:50We're in the controllers.
00:39:51We got to play.
00:39:52Here, here, here.
00:39:52Okay, let me find another one.
00:39:54All right, watch on.
00:39:55Whoa!
00:39:57Look at this!
00:39:59Whoa, whoa, whoa!
00:40:01Get that thing away, Jesus!
00:40:05Hey, dude, nice shot.
00:40:11Wasn't me.
00:40:15Whoa, whoa, nice!
00:40:19Are you sitting there or something?
00:40:21Hey, you found the grenade launcher. Nice, nice!
00:40:25Do you have the extra controller?
00:40:29Do you have the extra controller?
00:40:33I don't know.
00:40:35I don't know.
00:40:37I don't know.
00:40:39I don't know.
00:40:41I don't know.
00:40:43I don't know.
00:40:45I don't know.
00:40:47I don't know.
00:40:49I don't know.
00:40:53Whoa!
00:40:55You are the controller.
00:40:57No, I just...
00:40:59I didn't.
00:41:01I swear, I...
00:41:03I don't know.
00:41:13Hey, Sue.
00:41:15What's going on, man?
00:41:17It's okay.
00:41:19Hey, Sue.
00:41:21Didn't you hear me calling you?
00:41:23Yeah, I just needed to...
00:41:25Um...
00:41:27Oh, sure.
00:41:29Listen, Sue, I...
00:41:31I was rethinking what I said earlier.
00:41:33You were?
00:41:35You mean...
00:41:37Yeah.
00:41:39Yeah.
00:41:41So you think we should give it a try?
00:41:43Could we go get a drink?
00:41:45Wow.
00:41:47Um, your toilet's really...
00:41:49Oh, you...
00:41:51Do you know what?
00:41:53I gotta go.
00:41:55Um, happy birthday.
00:41:57Uh, no, Chris!
00:41:59No, there wasn't!
00:42:00I didn't...
00:42:01God, never mind.
00:42:03This was the worst idea ever.
00:42:05Never going to have sex.
00:42:07Ow!
00:42:08Ow!
00:42:09Ow!
00:42:37Hello?
00:42:38A little attention here.
00:42:39Oh, yeah.
00:42:40Sorry.
00:42:41Lex.
00:42:42Don't be selfish.
00:42:43Oh, right.
00:42:44Sorry.
00:42:45Uh...
00:42:46Uh...
00:42:47Uh...
00:42:48Uh...
00:42:49Uh...
00:42:50Uh...
00:42:51Uh...
00:42:52Uh...
00:42:53Uh...
00:42:54Uh...
00:42:55Uh...
00:42:56Uh...
00:42:57Uh...
00:42:58Uh...
00:42:59Uh...
00:43:00Uh...
00:43:01Uh...
00:43:02Uh...
00:43:03Uh...
00:43:04Uh...
00:43:05Uh...
00:43:06Uh...
00:43:07Uh...
00:43:08Uh...
00:43:09Uh...
00:43:10Uh...
00:43:11Jeez.
00:43:12Who invented this stupid position, anyway?
00:43:15Too much fucking multitasking.
00:43:17Screw it.
00:43:27Uh...
00:43:28Uh...
00:43:29Uh...
00:43:30Uh...
00:43:31Uh...
00:43:32Uh...
00:43:33Uh...
00:43:34Uh...
00:43:35Uh...
00:43:36Uh...
00:43:37Uh...
00:43:38Uh...
00:43:39Uh...
00:43:40Uh...
00:43:41Uh...
00:43:42Uh...
00:43:43Uh...
00:43:44Uh...
00:43:45Uh...
00:43:46Uh...
00:43:47Uh...
00:43:48Uh...
00:43:49Uh...
00:43:50Uh...
00:43:51Uh...
00:43:52Uh...
00:43:53Uh...
00:43:54Uh...
00:43:55Uh...
00:43:56Uh...
00:43:57Uh...
00:43:58Uh...
00:43:59Uh...
00:44:00Uh...
00:44:01Uh...
00:44:02Uh...
00:44:03Joanna, do you know a guy named JJ?
00:44:20I think that guy's name starts with a J.
00:44:25Hey, does your name start with a J?
00:44:29Yes, it does.
00:44:31So, you're JJ?
00:44:31Uh-oh.
00:44:55Hello.
00:44:56Welcome to 1900 Confess.
00:44:58Would you like a priest or a nun today?
00:45:00A nun.
00:45:01Please punch in your credit card number.
00:45:08Please hold.
00:45:09Oh, thank goodness.
00:45:141900 Confession.
00:45:15How may I be of service?
00:45:16It's been one day since my last confession.
00:45:18I accuse myself of the following sins.
00:45:21One day?
00:45:22Is that too long?
00:45:30I would have come this morning, but it's my 18th birthday.
00:45:32Go on.
00:45:33What's your problem?
00:45:35Uh, okay, well, I've been touching myself inappropriately.
00:45:39Well, actually, I didn't know a washing machine did.
00:45:41What's her problem?
00:45:42A washing machine touched her.
00:45:44Well, you know, I sat on a washing machine and, well.
00:45:49All right, freak, time's up.
00:45:51What?
00:45:51But what do I do?
00:45:53Just unplug the thing.
00:45:54No, but I think I might have had an orgasm.
00:45:58Well, then be happy you found the perfect man.
00:46:01I'm serious.
00:46:02Look, honey, you seem like a nice young lady, so.
00:46:05Well, I'll tell you this, masturbation isn't a sin.
00:46:11No contritions?
00:46:13You broke no covenant with God.
00:46:15It's not in the Bible.
00:46:17So the washing machine could touch me anytime?
00:46:20Like morning, afternoon, night?
00:46:23Yes, and other things can touch you.
00:46:26Accidental masturbation is not a sin.
00:46:28Neither is intentional masturbation.
00:46:31Huh.
00:46:32God's pretty cool that way.
00:46:34He sure is.
00:46:35Now run along.
00:46:39Wow.
00:46:40How do you know all that?
00:46:42Because I'm a nun.
00:46:44Now eat my pussy, bitch.
00:46:47Huh.
00:46:47Accidental masturbation.
00:46:49Who would have thought?
00:46:59Revenge sex.
00:47:00What a stupid fucking idiot.
00:47:02God, I'm getting out of here.
00:47:04Yeah, admit it.
00:47:07I've got no game.
00:47:09I guess I can skip everything.
00:47:10I guess I'm a beautiful man.
00:47:15Fucking douchebag.
00:47:17Damn it.
00:47:18I know I have to get laid if it's the last thing I do.
00:47:22You go, girl.
00:47:24What?
00:47:26What are you doing here?
00:47:28We needed someplace private.
00:47:30But hey, listen.
00:47:31If you're serious about getting laid.
00:47:33Yeah.
00:47:34If you want someone great.
00:47:35I mean, really, the best ever.
00:47:39No offense.
00:47:41Frank.
00:47:41The blind guy?
00:47:43Really?
00:47:44I'm telling you, he's amazing.
00:47:48I had food sex with him a few weeks ago.
00:47:50It was like nothing I've ever experienced before.
00:47:52It was like, we used all our senses.
00:47:56Everything.
00:47:58If you're interested, I'll set it up.
00:48:02All right.
00:48:09What about him?
00:48:10Jeremy.
00:48:11Oh, yeah.
00:48:12I know Jeremy.
00:48:13Hey, I think I fooled around with him once.
00:48:16I didn't know his last name, though.
00:48:18It's Jones.
00:48:20Jeremy Jones.
00:48:21This all makes sense.
00:48:23Excuse me.
00:48:25Jeremy.
00:48:27Hi.
00:48:27Hey.
00:48:28Who's on the phone?
00:48:29Oh, that's my new girlfriend.
00:48:31You'll meet her.
00:48:32It'll be here in like an hour.
00:48:34Wait.
00:48:34You have a girlfriend?
00:48:41Oh, hey, Frank.
00:48:51Sit.
00:48:55Oh, you meant...
00:48:56You meant the dog.
00:49:00Relax.
00:49:02You need to relax and calm down.
00:49:11Oh, I'm...
00:49:14I'm relaxed and fine.
00:49:16Why are you biting your nail?
00:49:18I'm not.
00:49:21How did you know that?
00:49:25Corner.
00:49:29Sit.
00:49:31Roll over.
00:49:35Oh, you mean me.
00:49:39Roll over.
00:49:41Oh, you mean me.
00:49:44Oh, how do you...
00:49:45How do you want me to...
00:49:47Just lay down.
00:49:48You want me...
00:49:48Oh.
00:49:59Oh.
00:50:00Oh.
00:50:00I shouldn't even be doing this, but...
00:50:03I'm considering it a teachable moment.
00:50:05Okay.
00:50:09Oh.
00:50:11See me with your hands.
00:50:17All right.
00:50:18Uh...
00:50:18You know, I should really...
00:50:26I have a boyfriend,
00:50:27and I shouldn't be doing this.
00:50:28Really.
00:50:28Oh.
00:50:28Oh.
00:50:29Ooh.
00:50:41Mmm.
00:50:41Peanut butter.
00:50:42Frank, Frank, oh, oh, Frank.
00:51:12Frank, oh, Frank, oh, Frank, oh, Frank, oh, Frank.
00:51:42It's just a case of accidental masturbation, that's all.
00:51:56No, let me do this, go ahead.
00:51:58I got it.
00:51:59I got it.
00:52:00No, really, please, I want to help.
00:52:04Okay, everybody out.
00:52:06Leave, I have to back you.
00:52:12You're not even getting the chips.
00:52:22They're over here.
00:52:24I see some dust over here, so...
00:52:28It's just so much dust on this floor.
00:52:33It's a dirty floor.
00:52:35Such a dirty, dirty floor.
00:52:56Okay.
00:52:58Oh, all right.
00:53:00Oh, I think I got all that.
00:53:03I'm just going to see you at home.
00:53:11We got it.
00:53:12Oh, here we go.
00:53:14Frankie.
00:53:16Oh, my.
00:53:17What was that?
00:53:18What?
00:53:19Ah, fucking shit.
00:53:21Man, we got a smoke.
00:53:22Oh, we can smoke in here.
00:53:25Stop.
00:53:26Frank, stop teasing Frank.
00:53:28Oh, shit.
00:53:30Oh, sorry, man.
00:53:31We're just looking for a place to finish this roach.
00:53:33Oh, I heard something.
00:53:34You want to join us?
00:53:35Uh, no, I might.
00:53:36Come on, you got to do it.
00:53:38Come on.
00:53:39Seriously, guys, I need to go back.
00:53:40What's the dog, man?
00:53:41Dude, what's it like being blinded?
00:53:42It's trippy.
00:53:47Frank?
00:53:49Frank, are we going to do something soon?
00:53:53Bro, you are too funny.
00:53:57Thanks, man.
00:53:58Oh, this is some good stuff.
00:53:59I haven't smoked since junior high.
00:54:01Dude, I haven't stopped smoking since junior high.
00:54:04Wait, wait, wait.
00:54:05I feel like I was supposed to be doing something.
00:54:10Damn, I really can't remember.
00:54:11This is some good shit.
00:54:12Oh, no, you're the devil.
00:54:26Oh, no, you're the devil.
00:54:33No more.
00:54:37JJ, I'm Jeremy.
00:54:39You have to remember that amazing time we had together, don't you?
00:54:42Please.
00:54:43Lex, I can't.
00:54:46I mean, I got a girlfriend.
00:54:48I really like this girl.
00:54:50Fine.
00:54:51It's just so sad because I'm wearing this coupless bra,
00:54:56and I also have on crotchless panties
00:54:59with just a little string of pearl in front for extra stimulation.
00:55:05Oh.
00:55:09We've got like 30 minutes before she gets here.
00:55:12Perfect.
00:55:16Before she gets here.
00:55:17Perfect.
00:55:18Perfect.
00:55:18Oh, yeah.
00:55:28Do it.
00:55:29Let's do it.
00:55:31Fuck me.
00:55:31Fuck me now.
00:55:36What?
00:55:37What's wrong?
00:55:38I can't.
00:55:39I can't get it in.
00:55:41It's too dry down there.
00:55:42It's a desert down there.
00:55:44It's sandpaper.
00:55:46It's just...
00:55:46Okay, I get the picture.
00:55:48Just try it again.
00:55:51No.
00:55:52Why is this happening?
00:55:54We fooled around before.
00:55:56I was dripping wet.
00:55:57I came like four times, remember?
00:55:59Just do what you did then.
00:56:00Go on.
00:56:01I already did my thing.
00:56:02I already tried.
00:56:05What?
00:56:05What is different this time?
00:56:07I don't know.
00:56:09Last time...
00:56:13I honestly don't even know what you're talking about.
00:56:15What?
00:56:15You're not JJ?
00:56:19But your name is Jeremy Jones.
00:56:21How can you not be JJ?
00:56:23Who the hell is this JJ?
00:56:26Where are you going?
00:56:27We're not done here.
00:56:29I can still do this.
00:56:30I just need a little bit of work.
00:56:31I can do this.
00:56:32I don't need JJ.
00:56:34I don't need anyone else.
00:56:35We can do this.
00:56:38Go team.
00:56:39What?
00:56:43Just keep going.
00:56:46Shit.
00:56:59Where's Jeremy?
00:57:00Hi.
00:57:01Uh, we were just, you know, cooking.
00:57:05Hey, babe.
00:57:06Just working out.
00:57:11How could you, you bastard?
00:57:16You might want to...
00:57:17What?
00:57:19What?
00:57:20Mariela!
00:57:25Mariela!
00:57:26You know, those aren't mine.
00:57:29At least not all of them.
00:57:31What is wrong with you?
00:57:36What is wrong with you?
00:57:39You used to be so pure.
00:57:41Well, no more.
00:57:42That's it.
00:57:44Really, that's the last one.
00:57:45Come on.
00:57:46Come on, man.
00:58:15Cheryl?
00:58:16What is it?
00:58:20What are you doing down here?
00:58:22Waiting for everyone to leave so I can sneak out and get far, far away from here.
00:58:27What?
00:58:28Why?
00:58:29Nothing, just this blind guy and his dog and ugh.
00:58:33Honey, it's gonna be okay.
00:58:35No, it's not okay.
00:58:37God.
00:58:39And you know whose fault it is?
00:58:41I'm sorry.
00:58:42It's Jake's.
00:58:43Jake's fault.
00:58:44That blind, cheating bastard.
00:58:46Yes.
00:58:47He is such a dickwad.
00:58:49You need to confront him.
00:58:50Yeah.
00:58:51Yeah, I need to confront him.
00:58:53I mean, it's my birthday and where is he anyway?
00:58:56Like, why isn't he hanging out with me?
00:58:58You know, you just call him here and give him a big piece of your mind.
00:59:01Yeah, a big piece.
00:59:02A big old chunk of my mind.
00:59:04A big piece of it.
00:59:05Yeah.
00:59:06You know, you might wanna...
00:59:09You need to look hot while you break up with him.
00:59:11Yeah, you're right.
00:59:13Why am I wearing a sheet?
00:59:15No.
00:59:21I'm sorry.
00:59:22I'm sorry.
00:59:23I get shy around beautiful women like you.
00:59:29I got no game.
00:59:30It's not important.
00:59:37Hey, um...
00:59:38Eric, I can't talk right now.
00:59:39No, no, no.
00:59:40I really need to talk to you.
00:59:54Really, Eric, I can't right now, so...
00:59:56No, no, no, no.
00:59:57I just wanted to say I'm sorry about earlier and I'm just embarrassed and I wanna make it up to you.
01:00:02Eric, really?
01:00:04I don't care.
01:00:05It's fine.
01:00:06No, but I do.
01:00:07I mean, I do.
01:00:08I care.
01:00:10I haven't known how to tell you.
01:00:12Maybe because, I don't know, I'm a little shy.
01:00:15But I was wondering or hoping that we could go out sometime.
01:00:21Soon.
01:00:22Because I'm gonna be leaving for a little while and it would be nice to go out.
01:00:25Really?
01:00:26Eric, you're shy.
01:00:27You have no game.
01:00:28No, not really.
01:00:31Yeah, no, I can't do this.
01:00:34Sorry.
01:00:35Okay.
01:00:36Alright.
01:00:37I, uh...
01:00:40Happy birthday, then.
01:00:44Happy birthday, then.
01:00:55Oh, I'm sorry.
01:00:56I was trying to kiss you.
01:01:06Wow.
01:01:14Here I come, baby.
01:01:15Get ready for your big birthday surprise.
01:01:21Oh.
01:01:22Babe, stop.
01:01:23Um, we can't do this.
01:01:24Oh, God damn it.
01:01:25Not again.
01:01:26Oh, no, um...
01:01:27Honey, happy...
01:01:28What the fuck is this?
01:01:29Who the hell are you, dude?
01:01:30Okay, guys, don't.
01:01:31Cheryl.
01:01:32Baby.
01:01:33What is this?
01:01:34Who the hell are you, dude?
01:01:35Okay, guys, don't.
01:01:37Cheryl.
01:01:38Baby.
01:01:39What is this?
01:01:40What is this?
01:01:42Oh, gee, Cheryl.
01:01:43You're...
01:01:44Yeah, I've been looking for you all night, and you've been...
01:01:45Oh, man, no wonder I couldn't find you.
01:01:46You couldn't find me?
01:01:47What about all those girls' vaginas you were in, or your penis getting sucked?
01:01:48Cheryl, honey.
01:01:49No, no.
01:01:50We can work this out.
01:01:51Baby, I love you.
01:01:52Jake, no.
01:01:53You have to go.
01:01:54Baby, I'll be faithful from now on, please.
01:01:55I promise.
01:01:56No, Jake.
01:01:57I can't do this.
01:01:58I'm sorry.
01:01:59Oh, Cheryl.
01:02:00No.
01:02:01No.
01:02:02No.
01:02:03No.
01:02:04No.
01:02:05No.
01:02:06No.
01:02:07No.
01:02:08No.
01:02:09No.
01:02:10No.
01:02:11Oh, Cheryl, come on.
01:02:12No.
01:02:13Jake, please.
01:02:14Just go.
01:02:15Please, come on.
01:02:16Just go.
01:02:17I'm sorry.
01:02:18You're a harmless bitch!
01:02:19How can you do...
01:02:20Yay!
01:02:21You did it.
01:02:22I am so proud of you.
01:02:23You got your revenge sex.
01:02:24You left him under your shell of a man.
01:02:26Revenge sex?
01:02:28It's really not what it sounds like at all.
01:02:31Right.
01:02:32It all makes sense now.
01:02:33Wow.
01:02:34I feel really stupid.
01:02:35Eric, I'm really...
01:02:36I'm really sorry.
01:02:37Cheryl, I really liked you.
01:02:38And you used me.
01:02:39Eric, please don't go.
01:02:40Please, Eric!
01:02:41Aren't you happy?
01:02:42Well, no.
01:02:43That's not exactly how it's supposed to feel like.
01:02:44You mean the sex?
01:02:45Was it...
01:02:46Yeah?
01:02:47No, we didn't quite do it.
01:02:48Oh.
01:02:49You know, I couldn't seem to do it either.
01:02:50Really?
01:02:51I just never found the right guy.
01:02:52Or guys.
01:02:53Anyway.
01:02:54We better get downstairs.
01:02:55People are starting to leave.
01:02:56I wonder how Sue did.
01:02:57I can't believe she dumped me, man.
01:02:58This is bullshit.
01:02:59No, we didn't quite do it.
01:03:01You know, I couldn't seem to do it either.
01:03:04I just never found the right guy.
01:03:06Or guys.
01:03:08Anyway, we better get downstairs.
01:03:10People are starting to leave.
01:03:12I wonder how Sue did.
01:03:24I can't believe she dumped me, man.
01:03:26This is bullshit!
01:03:29Oh! Oh!
01:03:31Suck it!
01:03:32What the?
01:03:33God, I'm out of here!
01:03:35Yeah!
01:03:36He has good hair, though.
01:03:41Don't you puke on me.
01:03:43Don't puke my car, either.
01:03:45Oh, Sue, are you all right?
01:04:01Was it from sex?
01:04:02Did you pop your cork?
01:04:03I don't think so.
01:04:04Not with the guy, anyway.
01:04:06Oh, don't ask.
01:04:08Every possible object.
01:04:10It's like every mechanical thing.
01:04:12It was like transformers.
01:04:14They just all became vibrators.
01:04:16I told you.
01:04:18It's addicting.
01:04:20So what about Chris?
01:04:22Well, last time I saw him, he was running away for dear life.
01:04:24I told you he was gay.
01:04:25Oh.
01:04:26Well, I think I'm just all cramp.
01:04:31Oh.
01:04:32I think it's broken.
01:04:33So wait.
01:04:35None of us cashed an RV card.
01:04:41Oh, Joanna, you're so sweet.
01:04:43So I was gonna go grab some food.
01:04:45Wanna go?
01:04:46No.
01:04:48I think I should finish up here.
01:04:50Did you ever find that guy you were looking for?
01:04:52No.
01:04:55I don't know.
01:04:56For some reason, I just realized he needs to be my first.
01:04:59Or something.
01:05:00Why?
01:05:01Do you know him?
01:05:02Sort of.
01:05:03Oh.
01:05:04Well, hey, if you happen to run into him,
01:05:06tell him I'd like to see him again.
01:05:14Love him.
01:05:15Shut it.
01:05:16You want to do it?
01:05:17I don't want to hear it from you.
01:05:18I want to get married.
01:05:19You want to do it?
01:05:20All right.
01:05:21All right.
01:05:22All right.
01:05:43All right.
01:05:46Um.
01:05:47No.
01:05:48Nowhere.
01:06:04Oh, well.
01:06:05There's always next year.
01:06:13It's you.
01:06:28I've been waiting for you.
01:06:31JJ.
01:06:35Joanna.
01:06:43I need an answer!
01:07:05I got to reach out to do so.
01:07:08You know, you guys should have been moving.
01:07:11Wow.
01:07:36That's amazing.
01:07:39Yeah, I didn't know I had it in me.
01:07:42I guess something inspired me.
01:07:45He really captured his expression and his eyes.
01:07:49Yeah, even that little callic he has in his hair.
01:07:54Whose?
01:07:55Eric's.
01:07:56Well, it's him, right?
01:07:59Oh.
01:08:01Yeah.
01:08:03I have to go see him.
01:08:09Well, I think you know what we should do.
01:08:11Mm-mm.
01:08:21One-nine-hundred confess.
01:08:24Sister Theresa?
01:08:26Yeah, hon.
01:08:27There was a problem with your credit card.
01:08:29I just need the last three numbers in the back.
01:08:32Oh, sure.
01:08:34It's 271.
01:08:36Um, sister, I know this isn't a confession,
01:08:38but can I ask your opinion on something?
01:08:41Do you think if you do something bad
01:08:43that God will forgive you, like, take you back?
01:08:47Sure, hon.
01:08:48Why not?
01:08:49As long as you're on the right path.
01:08:52Well, how do you know if you're on that path?
01:08:55I always look for some kind of sign from the universe,
01:08:58something to let me know that it's all going to be okay.
01:09:03Sister, can I get up now?
01:09:06I really got to pee.
01:09:07No! Hush your trap!
01:09:11Okay, honey, I really need to get back to work,
01:09:13but call back any time.
01:09:15I will.
01:09:17Thanks.
01:09:20Sister?
01:09:21Shut up or I'll punish you hard, you sheep fucker!
01:09:24Mwahahahaha!
01:09:28Eric, wait!
01:09:43Cheryl?
01:09:46Eric, um, look, I am so sorry about everything.
01:09:52I was trying to have revenge sex with you
01:09:54at the beginning, but then at the end I wasn't.
01:09:56I just didn't want to do that with you.
01:10:00The revenge part, not the sex part.
01:10:03Um, I, I do want to go out with you.
01:10:08And I didn't realize that until this morning.
01:10:12I mean, you're a completely different guy than Jake is,
01:10:14and he's all over these pink hair.
01:10:17Come on, I gotta get going.
01:10:20Oh, wow.
01:10:21Um, Cheryl, uh, this is my sister, Tina.
01:10:24Tina, Cheryl.
01:10:26Hi, nice to meet you.
01:10:31Uh, so, um, do you mind if I call you in a few days
01:10:36when I get back?
01:10:37Yeah, sure.
01:10:38Oh.
01:10:46Sorry.
01:10:46No kissing, right?
01:10:47No, kissing.
01:10:48Oh.
01:10:49Mm.
01:10:49Hey, did you ever, uh, get those flowers I sent you?
01:11:09I, I don't even care that you hooked up a plexi.
01:11:12Wait, what?
01:11:13I never did that.
01:11:14I mean, you don't have to lie about it.
01:11:17She told me all about your pierced tongue.
01:11:24She must have me mixed up with someone else.
01:11:27I wonder who it was.
01:11:28At least this birthday's over.
01:11:49Dear Lord, please forgive me.
01:12:03I mean, if you could just, I don't know, like, send me a sign.
01:12:07I don't know.
01:12:26I don't know.
01:12:27I don't know.
01:12:27I don't know.
01:12:28excuse me excuse me do you know where the church is it's on fountain street um yeah that's the
01:12:45church i go to or used to go to um it's straight up that way and then left thank you you're more
01:12:53than welcome to come with me if you like oh i don't know well that's pretty powerful oh 250 horsepower
01:13:10225 pounds of torque like i said you're more than welcome to hop on i don't think so but thanks
01:13:19what's your name sue what's yours jesus really si maybe i could use the ride
01:13:30oh
01:13:42oh
01:13:46We'll see you next time.
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